Wayfaring Stranger: Lost and Found by Amazon X and Ursula lex Krycek rolled over in the early morning sun to stretch and yawn. His arm bumped the man sleeping next to him, jolting him awake. "Ow!" he cried, rubbing his forehead. Alex rolled toward him and kissed the boo-boo. "I'm sorry, Walter. It was an accident. How can I make it better?" Walter Skinner sat up, blanket slipping aside, and covered Alex's body with his, giving the man a long, deep good-morning kiss. "I would say you could give me the high, hard one, but I don't think I can lie in that position after what we did last night." "The high, hard one? You *are* old!" Alex exclaimed as Walter rolled off him. He untangled himself from the sheet which had twisted around his leg and slid out of bed, his ass offering a tempting target for the swat on his ass that Walter gave him. Alex giggled as he closed the door, satisfying his lover's need for personal privacy. It didn't make any sense to Alex, having his mouth all over his lover, but Walter had a certain old fashioned sense of propriety, and it was a small concession to keeping his lover happy that he closed the door when he used the toilet. After washing his face and hands, and rinsing his mouth with the orange-flavored stuff Walter liked, Alex walked out, prepared to get back in bed and snuggled, when from behind the door, a huge grizzly bear jumped out at him. Alex's head spun a moment, until the bear laid him out on the bed and straddled his body, baring his teeth and growling. Alex couldn't help but laugh. "Are you laughing at me?" Walter asked, more mock growling following. "Um, yeah, I am. Whacha gonna do about it?" Alex mocked back. He was used to Walter playing games like this, and none of them were scary in any sort of way. Once, and only once he'd had a bit of a flashback, but when he smelled Walter's cologne, it brought him back to the moment, back to the lover who cared for him and only wanted to worship his body. Walter smothered his face and neck with kisses, pausing every few minutes to dive deeply into Alex's mouth, tasting all of his essence. Alex responded with fire and fervor, allowing Walter access to every part of him, regardless of the rough hands he used. It was Walter, the man who loved him and believed in him, who gave up his career and life to be with him. Walter was his safety as he was Walter's. Walter settled between Alex's legs, pressing into the hole that he'd spent so much time in the night before. He'd put a condom and lube on before his attack and Alex relaxed, letting the long, thick rod slide in where it belonged. "Oh, god, Walter, you are so fuckin' big," he moaned. Walter latched his teeth into Alex's neck, biting to bruise, but not shed blood. Alex knew talking dirty turned Walter on. "Fuck me hard, lover. Fuck my ass so I can't sit!" With renewed fervor, Walter braced his arms on the bed and pounded into Alex, harder than he had in a while, knowing that Alex would need to use the foam ring for his chair, but welcomed it anyway. After both men came explosively, they lay together, ignoring the semen that was gluing them together, they held each other, sharing kisses and nuzzles, assuring Alex he was loved and revered. "Why do you like that, Baby? All the heavy stuff?" Walter asked. "I like to feel it for a week," was all Alex answered, kissing Walter's face. "Really? I mean, I get kinda rough with you. Are you sure you like that?" "Don't you?" "Well, yes, I do. But I'm asking you." "It's only you, Walter. I know you'll never hurt me, after what you went through for me," Alex said, "all those years we were apart and now it's almost over. In a few years, the aliens and the project will be fading nightmares." Walter cleaned himself up and then settled beside Alex. Lying in his lover's arms, Alex couldn't have felt safer in his life. "Let's stay in bed forever," Alex mused before burying his face in Walter's neck, inhaling his after shave and beneath it, the unique smell of his lover's very male scent. "I would love that, Baby. But you have to write that security manual and I have to work on this month's billing statements." Walter gave Alex a deep kiss on the mouth and sat up from the bed. "I want to know what the execs at Hopkins looked like when the opened in the morning and found you in the CEO's office with your Gameboy." "I told you! He spit his coffee out and choked for about ten minutes before he calmed down enough to realize his 'world renowned security firm' was fuck-all good against an 'international assassin and spy'. That was a great sell, Big Guy." "How do you think I can afford this big house you want to continually remodel?" Walter said before walking into the bathroom. Alex waited for the telltale flush and then barged in to join Walter in the shower. The rule was about toileting, not about washing afterward. Later that morning, Alex sat at his computer sipping coffee and downloading his email. He had a boring morning of writing ahead of him, before he would start on the next chapter of his fan fiction novel. He'd loved "Andromeda" since he first saw it and knew that Captain Hunt didn't really like that blonde chick. He'd rather have the brainy blond twink, just the way Walter wanted him. Alex was far from a twink, but Walter still wanted him, still felt young around him, as if Walter was actually old. Alex laughed to himself at the thought; his lover had more energy and more stamina than any one Alex had ever known. When an email popped up with an address reading MamaDeb@thepitts.com, he choked on his coffee, causing Skinner to look up from his desk across the room. They shared a large den as an office, but both sides were decorated in radically different styles. Skinner had a big desk, dark mahogany wood and a rich burgundy leather chair. His bookshelf and computer armoire matched the same dark wood, and there was a deep, thick brown rug under everything. Alex's side was the polar opposite, all light-colored wood, glass and metal. Everything was as new age and futuristic as possible on the bare wood floor. Alex liked simplicity, so he only used a laptop with everything optical and wireless. With so much infrared around, Walter was sure one of them would get cancer soon enough. "You OK, Alex?" Walter asked, starting to stand. "Yes, fine, thanks," he coughed out. "Email caught me...funny." Alex sat stunned for a moment, thankful Walter dismissed his coughing fit with a nod. The subject read "Come Home", and it was most definitely from Debbie. He could just picture her threatening Ted for his secure email address and then badgering Brian until he let her send the message, after she forced him to create the account for her and type the message for her. It was short and to the point. "Lex, there was a boy murde="center"> [Stories by Author] [Stories by Title] [Mailing List] [Gallery] [Links] [Resources] [Home] red and left in the dumpster. It sounded like the way those men wanted to leave you. Come home, maybe you can help me find his name. Love, Mom." Alex fought with all his might not to cry, not to vomit, not to run screaming from the room. He'd been through too much the last few years. Hong Kong and all the lovely pharmaceuticals Jeri got for him, the alien possession, the silo, his arm, hunting the aliens, Tunisia, faking his death, spending a year in the regeneration chamber for his arm and head. And now to finally being happy with Walter, who took retirement instead of trying to get promoted after Kersh was ousted. No, Walter proclaimed to the astonished director that he was just a silly fairy who wanted to give blowjobs for the rest of his life. His retirement party was well attended, not only by the large number of FBI agents who loved and respected him, but by the minority who just wanted to see what gossip said was true. Alex got up and went to the kitchen to empty his cup and wash it. He needed to get a hold of himself. He had other work to do, with the security company he and Walter were running as a money front for the resistance. Mulder and Scully were almost done, using the magnetite to stop the super soldiers and the aliens, exposing the remains of the Project to the clean white light of publicity just as Alex had told Mulder to do so long ago before they went to Russia. They would be finished soon and then they could reclaim their son from the Van De Kamps. There was so much to do. It was already April 15th; Skinner must be reviewing their taxes, even though they were done in January, the money spent on a week in Aruba sunning their buns and drinking Margaritas on the beach. There was no way he was going back to that freezing burgh, not if he was in his right mind. As much as he missed Debbie, the way she...no, there was nothing back there but hurt, hate and heartbreak. Pittsburgh, on the whole, no matter what friends he made there, was not good for him, in any way, shape or form. Alex poured a glass of orange juice for himself and went back to work, determined to push the thoughts of Debbie, the dead boy and his former life as Lex as far back in his mind as he could, relegating it back to its cobwebbed corner for another dozen years or so. If it were that simple, Alex would have been happy. If it were that simple, Walter would never have known, never found out, never be aware of what his lover went through. Walter didn't know what was in the email, but that had to be the catalyst for the months of strangeness that he and Alex went through afterward. It didn't seem like a big deal at first. Alex just seemed a little nervous to Walter. He didn't want to go to the bar with him, their favorite bar, Breezers. No, Alex wanted to stay home, cuddle on the couch, watching television with all the lights on. Which was very odd, considering, Alex didn't really like television much at all. Then, he would want to make love for hours, with the lights out. But Walter needed to speak to him the whole time. He'd even asked Walter not to wear deodorant, but to smell really gamy. Walter knew his body scent was particular, but not unpleasant. He would maintain the highest level of personal hygiene, but if he did not use deodorant soap and an antiperspirant, he would be ripe by midday, especially when the weather got warmer. Alex did not care. He professed to like a stinky lover. The calm lovemaking was fine by Walter. Alex was so very tactile, always wanting to touch and taste far longer and with more imagination and passion than any other lover Walter had been with. After a while, though, he became frantic in bed, wanting to hurry through their time together to get to sleep. Walter thought it was very strange, and finally asked Alex about his odd behavior. He'd spent enough time, the entire summer, dealing with it. Alex sat on the couch in the living room, watching "Spartacus" and drooling over the gladiators, sweating and fighting on the sleek plasma TV. Once upon a time, Alex would be the one sweating as he danced at the club. "Alex, I need to talk to you. It's important." Alex nodded and with a sad sigh, turned off the television. "What, lover?" he asked. Alex had a way of getting Walter to forget what he was trying to discuss, usually by exposing some of his body. Walter was focused this time. "What has been going on?" Walter looked intently into Alex's eyes, the jade depths hidden by quivering eyelashes. "What do you mean?" Alex asked. "I mean, you are becoming a completely different man," Walter said. You're having nightmares and not only won't you tell me what they're about. You're either shoving me away so hard I fall out of bed or you pull me so close, you bruise me. This is...very weird. And not like you at all." "I'm just...having some bad dreams. It's no big deal." Walter stood and swiped a hand over his smooth pate. He went to the oak bar and poured a glass of scotch, foregoing the ice. He took a sip, trying to calm himself. Fighting with Alex would not get him to answer the questions he asked any faster or more honestly. Since they'd reunited as a couple, they laid down ground rules, and "no lies" was one of the top five. "Alex, I love you more than anyone I've ever loved in my life. You know that. You mean more to me than anyone and anything. I need you to be straight with me. What was in that email last spring that set you off?" Walter asked, standing straight and looking directly in Alex's eyes. Alex turned his head a bit, looking away, his eyelashes veiling his eyes. Walter always caught Alex in his lies when he looked him in the eyes. Putting his hand on Alex's shoulder, Walter said, "Look at me! I want to know why you're so highly strung lately. If I don't make a sound before touching you from behind, you flinch. If I reach for you in bed while you're laying on...Oh, God, Alex...all those years as a fucking investigator and it just clicks now. Who hurt you?" The calm exterior that Alex always wore in the face of accusations broke briefly. Anyone who didn't really know Alex wouldn't have seen it, but Walter knew right away he'd made contact with a memory that Alex had locked away for a long time and used the pain to make him stronger, to get through things like losing his arm, being in Tunisia, and eventually, submitting to having his entire body regenerated to return to the fight in perfect shape for the battles yet to come. Pity the process that wiped one's body of scars didn't do the same for the brain. "It was a long time ago..." Alex started, then stood and said, "Pour me some vodka and meet me on the back porch. We should talk about this where I can wander around and get it all out." Walter was quick to pull Alex's favorite vodka, Stolichnaya infused with vanilla, from the freezer and pour two glasses. He sat and listened while his lover told him about the times between when he'd left Walter sprawled in the stairwell, and when he'd arrived in Hong Kong. He'd always left out the details, saying he stayed with friends, and Walter finally understood just how good those friends were. He'd seen checks to the Waylon Fund in Pittsburgh, but just thought Alex was donating to a generic charity for the tax write off. He never saw them, now that he thought about it, in Alex's monthly statements of deductions. Things were beginning to fall into place. When Alex was finally finished with his story, about friends he'd made, and the ultimate hurt and humiliation they had helped him through, he knew Alex would feel better for having told him everything. He stood to settle beside Alex leaning against the railing of the wraparound porch, and put his arm on Alex's shoulder. Alex pulled away. "Please, just...don't touch me right now. I'm there, in my head, right back there on Liberty Avenue, worrying about Deb and Vic and Michael and...I can't call her. She wants me to help her find the guy who killed the kid. I can't go back there, Walter. I can't." The tears were freely streaming down Alex's face as he finished the last of his drink. He walked past Walter into the house to put his glass into the sink, run the water, and splash some on his face. He stood there a moment, indicating to Walter that touching was welcomed again. They had a very strange unspoken language, each knowing the other's mannerisms as means of invitations or declinations. Walter slipped his arms around Alex's waist, prompting the younger man to turn and bury his face in Walter's strong neck. He cried a few more minutes before standing up straight and looking out the window. It was a clear night, still chilly. "Deb's probably still be awake, watching 'Gay as Blazes' reruns." He looked up at Walter's face. "I don't know if I can..." "Baby, go call your mother," Walter said softly, pushing Alex towards the phone. Walter knew Alex's history, growing up to the present day. And now, he knew everything. With his quiet words, he accepted Debbie as Alex's Mom, something he knew that Alex needed. Wiping the last tears from his cheeks, Alex walked to the phone and lifted the receiver. He dialed the number from memory, impressing Walter deeply. There was a pause while it rang and Walter could hear the loud, "Hello!" on the other end. Alex took a deep breath and squeezed his eyes shut. "Hi, Mom. It's Lex." "Angel! Holy Fucking Christ! What took you so fucking long to call me back, you little shit!" Alex winced at her words, but knew they were meant with love and concern. "I'm sorry...I just...I mean..." He couldn't stop from stuttering. "I know, Angel. I know what you're trying to say. It's OK, Lex. Just...come home. This is your home. It'll always be your home." Her voice was soft and soothing, the way she soothed him when he had nightmares and called out for Walter. He needed to tell her. "I, uhm...I've been living in a really nice home, Mom. With someone...a while now." "Oh, Angel, that's so great. Who is he?" She sounded like she still loved him, the way she did so many years before. "Mom, it's...Walter." Her squeal of delight brought him to tears. "Oh, that's wonderful! You better bring him to meet me, damn it. I know how much he means to you. Oh, Angel, it's so fucked up around here. You have to come home. Bring Walter with you. I'm dying to meet him." Alex paused a moment. He wanted to ask, but it hurt to think about the way...what they did to him. "Mom, I just...I don't know if it's safe to come back. It might not be safe for you." "Look, kid, I need you to come here and look at someone's picture. I think one of the men that hurt you killed himself after he was identified as having killed Jason Kemp." Alex was shocked back to the moment he was raped, when he first felt Thing One breach his body. "Wh...who's J-Jason Kemp?" "He was the boy that I found in the dumpster behind the diner, Lex. They got him. As soon as the dust settled, I sent that email. I need you, Angel. We have to find the other man." Alex took a deep breath and willed his voice steady. After all he'd endured in his life, after all the Consortium bullshit, alien possession and imprisonment, his arm, everything, this one little situation could bring him to his knees with fear. "Yeah, Mom, Walter and I will come to see you. I'll help you." "OK, Angel, we'll be waitin' for ya! Hurry!" She hung up on him, knowing that she was telling the whole diner about him. He stood there for a moment, shaking and crying, letting go, yet again. Walter, who had stood outside the room listening, was beside him, pulling his against the broad, muscled chest and stroking his hair gently. "Oh, Alex, I'm sorry you have to relive all that horror. We'll get the bastards that did this to you, I promise." "Bastard. Just one." Walter pulled back and looked down at him. "I thought you said..." "He killed himself. Well, that's what Mom thinks. I don't know the whole story. She wants to meet you." Walter smiled. "Meet me? Yeah, we can do that." "I don't know if *I* can. I mean...of everything that happened...I..." A large paw swept through Alex's sable, unruly hair. "This is the worst, isn't it? I'm just thankful that since I couldn't be there for you, you had support. At least, if nothing else, let's go so I can thank them. Please." Alex nodded and smiled. "Of course, Walter. We'll go." And so the decision was made. Of course, they needed to conclude their business with the security firm they were working with, then alert their clients they'd be gone for a while. Walter figured on a week, two at the most. They locked up the car and the truck, let the security company know they were out, and got into the rented Expedition. They shared the driving, but the four hour trip flew by quickly, with both men burying their noses in books when they weren't driving. Alex pulled the truck down Liberty Avenue, feeling the familiar warmth of brotherhood as he watched the pairs of men, and women, walking hand in hand, arm in arm, kissing and touching and laughing openly. It was truly coming home. Alex had warned Walter that it would be very cold, being almost Thanksgiving. Pennsylvania embraced the cold weather early, and held on tight. They packed sweaters and jackets and coats, knowing full well they'd also end up buying more clothing. Alex parked the SUV down the street from the diner and they stood together on the sidewalk. Alex just looked down the block as if seeing ghosts. "We should get indoors, Baby. It's too cold out here." Walter was always the voice of reason. Alex took his hand and pulled him to the diner. The colorful decorations made both men smile, with dozens of pride rainbows streaming in the wind. Alex pushed the door open and quickly surveyed the small, quiet crowd. "Mom! I'm home!" "Angel!" Debbie yelled and opened her arms to enfold him. It was like holding a stray cat. He never felt this wary. He also never had this much bulk, solid and well muscled flesh rather than the lean length of the boy he had been. When he met her eyes, she saw so much pain. He had been hurting when she knew him, but now he looked as if he had been to hell and back. She could see faint marks of scars on his face and, although his eyes still seemed wary, he seemed more confident, more likely to deal with danger by fighting than by running. Oddly, he was even more beautiful than she remembered as if life had carved away everything of the pretty boy, leaving this wounded warrior. "This is my Walter," Lex said, nodding his head toward the man with him. Well, Lex's Walter was Debbie's wet dream. Tall, built like a stack of brick outhouses. Things rippled when he moved and those tight hips and that high round ass made Debbie want to try for a conversion. Then Walter reached out, placing the tip of his hand on Lex's elbow. It was a small gesture, but it said a mint. 'He's mine,' Walter's attitude said, 'and I'm his.' Walter's body inclined toward Alex's, protective, possessive, intimate. "Hey," said Debbie. "You look fucking fantastic. Your Walter must be good for you." Oh man, look at that. The look Lex gave Walter was pure radiant love and wonder. Someone had found his knight in shining armor, but it wasn't no fucking princess. Debbie winced as she thought for a moment about her dreams. She always told herself that she was better off without, but that was just sour grapes. "I thought you would never come home," Debbie said. "All this time, wondering, afraid for youÉ" "I had a world of trouble in my life," Lex said. "It's just now got to the point when I could come here without putting you all in danger." "Are you in trouble, Angel?" Debbie asked. "Not anymore," Lex replied. "There's so much that has happened. You wouldn't believe most of it." "Yeah?" Debbie inquired, "You trying to act all mysterious? Michael used to do that when he was a kid. Thought he was a fucking comic book hero." Lex's Walter chuckled at that. He had a great laugh, sexy as hell. "Alex does mysterious pretty well. Ms. Novotny." "Don't I know! Didn't realize until he left that he really never told us much," Debbie said. "He mentioned you though, his Walter." The man looked pleased. He glanced at Lex and said, "He was on my mind a lot, too." Brian came strutting up, his hazel eyes summing up Walter's appearance and dismissing him. "Lex, you came back. Looks like the world's been treating you better. No more stray cat." "I was more like a stray rat," Lex replied. Debbie could see that Lex did not want Brian to spill anything about the brief relationship they'd had. Debbie joined her warning glance to Lex's, but Brian shrugged it off. Justin, bless his heart, smelled a rival. Brian's light of loves were one thing, but a mysterious stranger from the past with Lex's looks was another thing. "Hello. Brian, are you going to introduce me to your old friend?" Justin asked. He emphasized the old in a catty way. Sometimes, Debbie thought that Justin and Brian deserved each other. "Justin, this is Lex Arntzen, as you said, an old friend," Brian said. "Alex Krycek, actually," Lex corrected. "That's my real name." Lex glowed when he looked towards his partner. "This is Walter Skinner, my lover." Debbie saw that Walter did not like what he saw when he looked at Brian. When Justin claimed his territory, curling his body as close to his lover as possible, Walter's face went two shades toward beet. Debbie knew Justin well enough to know he was nineteen going on ninety. Hell, Brian was good with his young lover in ways no one expected, protecting him and trying to encourage him to continue his studies. Everyone was used to the age difference by now, but Lex's friend wasn't happy with it obviously. "I'm Justin Taylor," Justin said, "A very close friend of Brian's." "How old are you?" Walter asked. He sounded like a cop and Justin bristled in response. His voice dripping with snotty defiance, Justin said, "Old enough. I date older men. Not as old as you, though." "Justin!" Debbie reproved. Tossing his hair like a diva, Justin trotted his tight little ass across the floor to sulk in a booth. LexÉAlex laughed. Debbie didn't hear Lex laugh often, but she remembered his laugh. It had been delightful. Now, he sounded happy and his Walter smiled at the sound. "Brian, him?" Alex asked. "I thought you don't believe in long term relationships?" "It's not," Brian said. "Justin is...he's...Ah, shit, we're not exclusive. He's just the guy I fuck more than once or twice." "We are exclusive," Walter said, his hand on Alex's arm again to emphasize his words. He pulled himself straighter and puffed his chest. Debbie said, "I think it's wonderful that you got back together. Did Lex go back to you when he left here?" "Not then," Alex said. "It was years later." "Oh," Debbie said, hearing the pain. "Anytime you want to talk." "Thanks," Alex said, in a tone suggesting that he would rather be dragged over hot coals. Well, that hadn't changed. Alex was no more inclined to open up than Lex had been. "What's with all the decorations?" Alex asked. "Oh, we're celebrating!" Emmett said. "The defeat of the candidate from hell!" "Let me put some food up for you while the guys tell you what's been happening on Liberty Avenue," Debbie said. "Stockwell was shutting down all of our places, busting guys for anything, running campaigns that made us look like the greatest danger to the straights that every existed. If he had won, life wouldn't have been worth living," Justin said. "Brian was running the ads for the asshole, making him look like the all around family guy with an edge," Justin said. Alex remembered thinking that Spender would have loved to get his hooks into Brian. Brian had morals so situational that they hardly merited the name morals. "Seems self defeating," Alex remarked. "Whatever money you received, you wouldn't enjoy spending it in a homophobic nightmare of repression." "It was a challenge," Brian said. "A product is a product. I'm not supposed to decide whether it was moral or not. I'm supposed to sell it. My job was to make consumers buy Stockwell. That's what I did." Emmett sniffed dramatically. Alex glanced his way, suddenly aware that a couple of people were missing. Where the hell were Michael and Ted? He thought Ted and Emmett were glued together. They were a set. Emmett said, "You make your excuses, Brian. I nearly froze my beautiful ass off when all the places to fuck closed." A roll of the eyes and Brian said, "He lost, didn't he?" "No thanks to you," Emmett replied. Brian gave a strange, smug look in response to that. He was as always, keeping secrets. Brian was a natural born spy. Alex wondered what this one was. Something about this asshole StockwellÉ "So what brought the guy down?" Alex asked. He leaned toward Walter, wanting to know his lover was close. He hated feeling this way. He had always been able to take care of himself except after being assaulted here and when he lost his arm. Walter wasn't supposed to be his protector even if he was protective by nature. Alex wanted to love as an equal, not be weak and dependent. Shit. And here he was, two hairs from falling apart. This was a fucking stupid idea. He wasn't handling this very well. He had to get his shit together or he wouldn't be worth anything to Debbie. "We had a lot of rallies," Debbie said, "a big community meeting to meet the candidate, but we were ready. We had the victims of all the gay bashing around here and we had the kid who was killed. The one we found in the dumpster." "Like me," Alex said, shuddering. Walter's hand came up, resting on his shoulder. "I'm fine," Alex lied. "Right," Walter said, sounding as if his patience was being tried. "I'm here, Alex. Let me be here for you." "Yeah," Alex replied, reaching his hand up to cover Walter's. "I'm trying. It's still hard." "To be here?" Walter asked. "No, to let anyone care," Alex replied. "Get used to it," Walter replied. Damn, Walter was a man. His man. And that felt pretty good to think. Everything was okay until Justin unrolled the poster. Before he saw the poster, the story had made Alex feel good, even lifting the habitual cynicism with which he viewed the world. Maybe it wasn't the defeat of alien invaders, but it was a human victory and they were important too. The kid, Justin, had done most of the talking. Damn brat reminded Alex a little of both Mulder and Brian, sexy, self-centric like both Brian and Mulder, but as self righteous as Mulder at his worst. "I got kicked out of school when they caught me making these," Justin said. He unrolled a coil of stiff paper. Alex, at first, just caught the style, but when he saw the face, his knees buckled. His mind blanked out and if hadn't nearly fainted, he would have probably ran all the way back to DC. He must have blacked out for a while, because the next thing he knew, he was in Debbie's nap room, his feet up in Walter's lap while Debbie sponged his head with a cool cloth. His throat hurt as if he had been screaming. "Angel? Was it something about that poster? Something about Stockwell?" "No, it wasn't," Alex lied. "It was just being back here." Walter took his hand. Alex held on for dear life. He could see a trace of hurt in Walter's eyes as if his lover suspected that he wasn't being truthful yet Alex couldn't force the words out. He was back in the past where no one ever believed him, not about an upstanding member of the community like Stockwell. "I shouldn't have made you face this," Walter said. "I'm sorry, Alex." "No," Alex said, "I wanted to see everybody again. I'll be fine. Let me up." "I'm here for you," Walter said, his big hand still holding Alex's. Alex's head slowly cleared. Could he be wrong? Was the man in the poster, the fucking police chief, the other guy who raped him? His memories were a jumble. He hadn't really seen the guy clearly. He could have just projected the guy's face onto the ominous figure that Justin had created with his graphics. "So, Justin? Is that guy still police chief?" Alex asked. "Sort of, but the new mayor is keeping tight reins. I guess he thinks if he fires the guy that it would look bad because the chief ran against him. His contract runs out in a few months and the city council probably won't renew it. There are too many questions. Conspiracies." "I know about conspiracies," Alex said. He had thought CSM Spender was the most frightening man he ever had met. His head knew that his old enemy had posed a major risk to humankind, but his body told him that Stockwell was a horror. It made him feel sick with terror and with disgust for himself. Stockwell had reduced him to a suffering body and taken even the shreds of dignity that Spender had left him. His fear of Stockwell was personal, not like the way he had felt about Spender. Alex's stomach churned. Damn, Alex realized he was going to lose it. He ran for the bathroom, barely making it in time not to disgrace himself. Walter followed, of course. Alex waved him out, not wanting his lover to see him like this. A long time later, Alex emerged to find Walter waiting with Debbie. "The guys will close up for me," Debbie said. "Come on, Angel, let's go home." The bed was a double, not enough room even for lovers when the lovers were as tall and well built as the two of them. It was a relief when Debbie left. Walter liked her, he really did, but he wanted to be alone with Alex. Old habit made Walter pull on pajamas before going to bed. Sharon had insisted that he wear nice pajamas to bed when they stayed at a hotel or with friends. Alex wouldn't care. He preferred Walter naked, but Sharon had trained Walter well. He was always closed the toilet seat even when Alex was the one who had left it up. He never drank out of milk cartons or scratched himself in public. Alex had inherited a well trained husband whether he wanted one or not. Alex came back, pink scrubbed. Alex always loved to bathe. Hell, their bathroom was sybaritic, one of the best furnished rooms in their home. However, lately he had been showering or bathing several times a day. Still wet, Alex got into bed, huddled away from Walter. "Alex," Walter said, sounding grief stricken even to his own ears. "Alex, don't do this to yourself." Touching him felt like touching rock beneath the velvet of his flesh. This was not what Walter hoped would happen. His hand remained on Alex's shoulder, not forcing, but offering. Slowly, almost reluctantly, Alex turned. Walter moved a little closer and Alex folded into his arms, head buried in Walter's shoulder. "Spender always said I was weak. Mulder used to call me a coward every time he saw me. Guess they knew me." "You're no coward. Even Mulder knows that now. You are brave and beautiful," Walter said. Alex opened his robe and unbuttoned Walter's pajama top. "I need to feel you," Alex explained. "And, kiss you," Alex added, following through with a tentative kiss. Walter gathered him even closer and the kiss became passionate. Walter's tongue found Alex's unique flavor beneath the guise of mouthwash and toothpaste. He nuzzled Alex's neck, inhaling him deep, the scent beneath the soap telling him that this was his lover, his mate. Their hands explored each other, finding those familiar places that gave the most pleasure. Alex's lips parted beneath his and Walter's tongue became a gentle, but relentless invader. Alex's moan vibrated beneath Walter's lips. Walter could feel Alex's cock becoming insistent as it pressed against his groin. His own had no problem joining the joust of flesh. Alex's hands pushed down his pajama bottoms and the two paused to remove the barriers to bare flesh. Alex's leg rode over Walter's and Walter started to think he wanted to be fucked. At which point, there was a rap on the door, a cheerful voice yelling, "Ovaltine? There's nothing like a good cup of Ovaltine." And damn if Debbie wasn't in the room. The two men sprang apart, clutching bed sheet and blankets to conceal wilting erections. Walter seriously thought about pulling the covers over his mortified face. "Did I interrupt something?" Debbie asked, not quite as innocently as she probably wanted to sound. 'Mom!!" Alex said. "Damn Mom, you knock and then you wait." "Well, I didn't know," Debbie said. "I'm sorry." However, Debbie didn't move to leave the room. She picked up the strewn garments and said, "I'll just add these to the wash. Now don't bother getting up. I'll pour for you right in the bed." Walter waited in horror for Debbie to tuck herself right into the bed with them, but it didn't happened. She went around to the night table and set down a steaming cup of Ovaltine and a plate of cookies. "Alex always liked a cup of cocoa or Ovaltine before going to bed. This is going to be so much fun. Just like old times." Clutching an armload of pajamas and underwear, Debbie blew Alex a kiss and said, "I'll pick up the dirty dishes later. Don't move a muscle." Alex's machine gun chuckle was almost worth the surprise and embarrassment of Debbie's entrance. Almost. Walter waited until he was sure Debbie was out of hearing distance and said, "Love, we are going to a hotel tomorrow night. I don't think I can take this another night." "Yeah," Alex agreed. "Deb can be a little bossy and intrusive, but she means well. I think she loved me back to life when all that shit came down on me. These people here gave me understanding, help, even love when I thought I had lost everything." Guilt flooded over Walter. He said, "I know. Forget about it. We can stay here. Push a dresser up against the door or drug her if we want to make love." Alex chuckled again and said, "No, we go to the hotel. Making love to you makes me feel safe." Pouncing on his lover, Walter tickled his ribs and said, "Just safe? That's all you feel when we have sex?" 'No, no, no," Alex said. "Come on! Uncle!" Letting up before Alex's plea brought Debbie back down on them, Walter said, "We'll stay at the nicest hotel in Pittsburg." "Well, it's better than Jersey," Alex said with a smirk, "No St. Petersburg, but it's my second home. Here, drink your Ovaltine. Debbie will be back to tuck us in soon." "That's what I was afraid of," Walter remarked. Still, Debbie's intrusion had lifted Alex's spirits and made him laugh, which he surely needed as much as he needed Walter's love-making. Maybe coming here wasn't as bad a mistake as Walter feared it would be. Alex fell asleep in his arms, an Ovaltine mustache above his pretty mouth. Walter stroked his lover's forehead and promised that he would keep him safe here. There were ghosts in Alex's past, but maybe a few could be put to rest. Walter hoped. Walter and Alex woke early and made their way through their morning routines quickly. Debbie had already made her way down to the diner, so they decided to join her there for breakfast. When they walked in, Alex's two missing faces, he wished for the day before, were there waiting. Michael was the first to step over with a handshake to Alex, and then a polite hello to Walter. A blonde man brought up the rear behind him. "Lex, this is Ben, my boyfriend." "Alex, actually. I prefer that. Ben, it's nice to meet you." Alex smiled and Walter immediately put a hand on his forearm. "Walter, Michael is the kind soul whose bedroom we slept in last night." Walter nodded. Behind Ben came a familiar face, one looking tired and sad, but hopeful. The man looked at Alex and Alex couldn't stop himself. He threw his arms around new man, causing Walter to cock his head and look carefully. "Teddy, it's so good to see you," Alex said quietly. He pulled back and said, "This is my Walter. Walter, this is Theodore Schmidt, my friend. Ted and I have kept loosely in touch these last years. How have you been, Ted?" "Oh, lots of things have happened, but we can talk about it later, I guess. I...um...I have to go, but...we can get together later?" Alex looked down at Ted, trying to comprehend what was going on in the man's head. He would call Teddy later, and get to the bottom of his absence. Walter waited for Alex to get into the booth first, and was surprised to find Emmett slide in behind him. He'd enjoyed spending time with Emmett, who was your typical southern belle queen. It was a joy to see a real honest to god queen in all of his glory. "So, you're the Walter that Lex...um...Alex was yearning for all those years ago. We were wondering if he'd just been delirious and dreamed you up." Emmett smiled widely and looked Walter up and down. Alex knew when his man was being checked out. Walter had winced when Justin called him old, and Alex never considered Walter old. Mature and experienced, yes, but never old. No, Walter was a big bear that needed to love and be loved, and never showed his age. "No, I exist. We dated some before Alex...wandered off," Walter explained. Alex could hear the caution in his voice and he was thankful. It was far too early to tell them about what he had been through, what he had put Walter through, even if they knew most things from what was told to the press. "Well, thank God for that. I swear, Alex sure knows how to pick 'em, huh? First Brian, now you. Well, I suppose you were around before Brian, huh?" Emmett cheerfully ran on about how Brian and Alex sniffed around each other a while, like wary dogs, until finally giving in. Walter looked at Alex pointedly and Alex didn't know what to say. "Oh my God, you didn't...know...did you? Oh, Alex, honey, I'm sorry! My Aunt Lula always told me I ran off at the mouth." Alex knew he was in for it. He tried not to talk about his time in Pittsburgh, and just felt that talking about Brian wasn't necessary. He'd kept so many secrets from Walter, and the big, beautiful man just always took it in stride and said that it was part and parcel of loving one Alex Krycek, rat bastard. They always laughed at that nickname, and Alex knew Walter was kidding when he said it. This time, maybe Walter would say it, and mean it. "It's OK. I don't care what Alex did when I wasn't there. The past is the past. What's important is what's now." Alex looked into Walter's rich brown eyes and could barely keep the tears from welling up. That man truly loved him. "I keep trying to tell Michael that, but he thinks it's just a bunch of Buddhist nonsense," Ben said, pinching Michael's side. "I do not! I just think that...you know, the past is important." Alex smiled widely at the ever-present whininess of Michael's protests. Some things truly never change. "Buddhism isn't about ignoring the past, Mikey," Alex started. "We must be ever-mindful of the past, but that shouldn't hinder our movement forward. I'm sure Ben has told you that, as well." Ben cocked his eyebrow at Alex and asked, "Where did you study?" "I didn't. After I left Pittsburgh, I spent a number of months in Hong Kong, picking up the language and some religion. And a heroin habit. The only things I kept were my love of shark fin soup and all forms of cooked groupa, and a huge dislike for airports." The table got quiet, and Emmett excused himself to the bathroom. Michael looked pointedly Alex and said, "Ted and Emmett were together for a while." Immediately, Alex smiled. Whereas, he knew the kind of slut Emmett could be, he also know that the man was looking for a boyfriend, and not casual lovers. Michael didn't return his smile. "Some things happened here, thanks to our police commissioner, and Ted's website got him into trouble. Long story short, he was using crystal meth for a while, and he's finally gotten himself clean." "Oh, God, not my Teddy," Alex said. He shook his head, immediately feeling guilty that he hadn't kept in closer contact with his friends. "Lex," Brian started, "don't go there. This isn't something you could have prevented by coming here and trying to fix it. Ted took care of himself when he needed to. Anyway, Emmett and he aren't...together anymore. So...let it go around him, OK?" "Sure, no problem." Alex thinks back to when he first met Emmett, thinking the man just a silly queen, and learning that Emmett might talk a lot, but what he said mattered. When Emmett returned, Alex noticed Justin walk by with a dish bin tucked under his arm. "He works here?" Alex asked. "Oh, yeah, he's got your job. Had your room for a while, too. His family was less than thrilled when he came out." "If my mom were alive, she would have sent me to the monastery!" Alex commented. The table again became quiet. "That's why I chose Deb as my mom," he said quietly. "See, Mikey? Wish hard enough, you'll have a brother to fight your battles." Leave it to Brian to save the conversation with a smartass comment, thought Alex. "Somebody bothering you, little brother?" Alex said, smiling. Michael smiled back. "I'll be sure to get you to beat 'em up for me, big brother," he said, giggling. Justin walked by, carrying his dish bin and smiled at everyone at the table. "Hey, Justin! I didn't know you worked here," Alex said. "I used to do that when I was here." "Well, isn't that special?" Justin said, bitchy attitude dripping from each word. "Yeah, when his parents didn't appreciate his...'lifestyle', he stayed in your room, too," Brian explained. "MY room, damnit," Michael whined. Everyone laughed with him. Justin looked down at Alex and stated, "But I'll bet you didn't lose your virginity to Brian, or live with him?" He tilted his head up and looked down his pert little nose. Alex could smell a fight brewing. "Justin, I'm not in competition with you. I'm just observing our similarities. I'm here to visit. Don't forget, in a little while, I'll be going home." Alex locked on with Justin's hazel eyes. Alex noticed they reminded him a lot of Mulder's eyes. Justin nodded and went back to work, trying to get as much done before making his way back to school. Alex turned to Walter and said, "I should show you around, you know. Pittsburgh is a pretty cool place, if you have the right guide." Alex loved using that line from "Silence of the Lambs" on Walter, knowing Walter hated Dr. Chilton and was happy the man became dinner. "I think that's a great idea. We can do some shopping..." "Shopping! That's *my* department," Emmett stated. "Lex...uh, Alex, sorry. It'll take some getting used to. You've been the infamous Lex for a decade." "It's OK, Em, I still love you," Alex said and smiled. "Yes, Walter, shopping with Emmett is an amazing experience. Trust me, you'll never go back to Wrangler jeans again," he stage whispered. "Wranglers?" Emmett cried, a dramatic hand draped across his forehead. "Are you sure you're gay?" "He's gay, all right," Alex attested, "but he's a good old boy. Got them style issues, I'm afraid." With a kiss on Debbie's cheek from then entire pack, and some lemon bars for the road, the group made their way out of the diner. Brian and Justin excused themselves, with Brian driving Justin to school. Emmett and Michael started leading Alex and Walter down Liberty Avenue, in a direction Alex knew all too well. "Mikey, why are you taking me to Buzzy's? I never read comics, you know that." "I bought it," Michael stated proudly. "No way! That's fucking awesome, babe," Alex said, pressing a kiss to Michael's cheek. He looked over at Walter, whose cheeks had gained a little color. "Walter, I'm sorry. There's something about being home that makes me into a cuddly, raging queen." "I noticed," was all Walter offered. "Well, if a raging queen is what you become here, what are you like most of the time, Lex...uh, Alex." Emmett gave Alex a sadly pretty pout. "Usually, Alex is very driven, works very hard, low key and quiet. The difference is...it takes getting used to." Alex looked into Walter's deep brown eyes and asked, "Am I bothering you?" After a breath and a smile, Walter shook his head. "No, Baby, not at all. It's interesting to see you like this. You're really gay." He and Alex laughed heartily, getting strange looks from Emmett and Michael. Alex reached out and patted Emmett's shoulder. "We have a running joke that we're not really gay. Neither of us are at all queen, we can't decorate a house or coordinate a 'fah-bu-lus' outfit, so we must not really be gay. We like beer and sports and farting and shit like that. DC has a very quiet gay population. They all live in Georgetown near the college." "That must suck, keeping who you are under wraps," Michael said. "Bullshit, little man. I hide from no one. I retired from the bureau. The fucking president can kiss my ass. And that's what I told the bastard the last time he offered the directorship to me." Walter's grumble warmed Alex's belly. They all knew how important Walter had been to the bureau, but they probably didn't make the connection with the suited, bespectacled man on TV in the Senate hearings to the contact-wearing, very casually dressed man walking with them. Walter never left the house without his cowboy boots these days, unless he was going for a run. "Well, Big Man, let me be your guide to the gay side of town!" Emmett declared and took hold of Walter's arm. Michael and Alex laughed as Walter looked back at them with a worried expression. "Get 'im, Em!" Alex shouted. Michael hugged Alex at the door of his comic shop, but Alex asked Walter if they could go in and look. He'd been to Buzzy's, when it was Buzzy's, with Michael before, but wanted to see the new place. He looked around, enjoying the view, then saw the huge display for "Rage." "You make a comic book of Brian?" Alex asked, confused. "How did you know it was Brian?" Michael asked. Alex gave him a knowing look, but didn't want to say the actual words in front of Walter. Michael smiled back. Walter stood beside Alex and they looked at the issues of the comic that Michael and Justin authored together. Alex gathered a copy of every issue and took them to the register. Michael smiled, then frowned. "Sorry, Alex, but this first issue is actually a reprint. We ran out of first issues almost immediately." "Really? Oh, that's great! Man, I wish I had known, I'd have bought a few. What made you guys want to start a comic series with a gay hero? I think it's just awesome that you're finally doing something that you really love, Mikey." Emmett, getting impatient, grabbed Walter's arm and said, "Sorry, Mikey, but we have more important shopping to do!" Laughing and waving, Alex followed the comical pair out of the store and all over Pittsburgh. Well, the Pittsburgh that really mattered to metropolitan gay men. Knowing that Walter loved only him, he felt completely at ease letting Emmett fawn all over Walter, dressing him from the different stores, showing him how to buy pants that showed off his high, tight butt. "I swear, Walter, I could work out for years and never be in as good condition as you are!" Emmett gushed. "Well, Walter loves to drink this nasty protein drink and it helps pack on the muscles. He power lifts where I just want to maintain strength for agility. It's essential in our work. I love breaking into those high security buildings and waiting for the CEOs while sitting at their desks reading their hidden porn." Alex smiled, remembering finding that guy who seemed to enjoy erotic toe sucking and videos of guys giving feet the attention Alex gave Walter's cock. Trying the techniques on Walter ended up with his feet beside his ears as Walter pounded into his ass. As the men finished lunch at a very chic restaurant and walked together back toward Debbie's house, Alex caught site of an old campaign poster of Stockwell. He turned away and quickly grabbed hold of Walter's shoulder. Walter turned to Alex and saw that his lover had gone pale. He asked, "Baby, what's wrong?" Looking over Alex's shoulder, Walter saw the poster. Emmett looked as well. "Oh, God, that's one of Brian's posters, before Justin went nuts with his own. I still think he's sexy," Emmett said. "Stockwell is a prick, but sexy." Walter put his arms around Alex and said, "Emmett, I think our day is concluded. We'll be here for a while, so, can we continue this tour another day? My Baby needs to rest." Emmett smiled and said, "Of course, I'll...just...see you guys tomorrow." Walter walked Alex back to Debbie's house and went upstairs to the bedroom they were to share. "That man, Alex, the one on the poster; he's one of the men who raped you, isn't he? And don't deny it; I can see it in your face." Alex just nodded miserably. He took a deep breath, trying not to cry, willing the tears back into his eyes. "Yes, he raped me, beat me up, and left me for dead. I found some kind of strength to get away, and ran right into Mom's arms. You know the story." "I do, Baby, I do. You just rest here on the bed, let me pack us up and go to a hotel. OK?" "Yeah, OK." Alex closed his eyes and tried to rest. He drifted to sleep listening to Walter make their reservations. He was held down. They were on top of him, in him, around him, creeping down his throat like the black oil, splitting him open, filling him with venomous cum. They cut him with knives, carving away his limbs until there was nothing but his trunk and his screaming head. All the while, the room was filled with laughter, not only of his rapists, but Spender's horrible chuckle that Alex had heard too often in his life. Others joined them. Foster parents, social workers, Mulder, Scully, and Kersh. The final horror was to hear Walter's voice saying, "Look at him. Can you believe he thought I loved him? That he was worth anyone loving him?" Hands still held him down when he woke. He started to fight before he heard Walter say, "I'm here, love. I'm here. Shhh, Baby, I'm with you. I'll never leave you." It was his Walter. His lover. As Alex came back into his present, Walter freed him only to wrap his strong arms around Alex's body. Walter was on the bed with him, Alex pushed back, finding Walter's furry chest, his heated groin, his soft, but still ample cock between thighs like pistons. Walter's lips were against Alex's neck, his breath warm against the tender flesh of his throat. "Don't let me go," Alex begged. "Is he okay?" Debbie's frightened voice asked; she must have been just outside their door. "Yeah," Walter answered. "Angel, do you want Mom?" Debbie asked. No, he didn't. Alex knew it was terrible, but if Debbie reached for him, he would push her away. Walter was his harbor, his stone. He had left so long ago to protect Debbie, knowing that she was strong, but never as strong as she pretended. Walter was rock. Walter could take him, all of him, the evil he had done, the evil that had been done to him. Turning, Alex buried his face in his lover's neck. "I need you. God, how I need you, Walter. I don't know how you can stand me this way." "You're my love," Walter reassured. "We can get through this together. I promise you. We're going to get that bastard." "The man who raped Lex?" Debbie asked. "He's dead." "There were two men," Walter explained. "Alex saw a poster that Justin made. The other man was in it." "Stockwell?" Debbie said, horror in her voice. "You're shitting me! I knew he was terrible, but this? Is Alex sure?" "I'm not lying now!" Alex said. "Everyone thinks I lie all the time." "Oh, Angel, I don't think so," Debbie said. She sat down on the bed and put a hand on Alex's shoulder, petting him. She leaned into him until Alex was held between the two people he trusted to care for him. Gradually, his heart stopped trying to hammer out of his chest and Alex became aware that he was naked. Not the first time Debbie had seen him this way, but he had less excuse now. He also reeked of fear to the point that he couldn't stand his own smell. "I need a bath," Alex said. "Mom, can I have some of your chicken soup?" "Yeah, Angel, I have some stock in the freezer and I just made noodles," Debbie said. "Thanks, Mom," Alex said. A few minutes later, Alex was crammed into Debbie's bathtub with Walter. He hoped the hotel had a king sized tub. He was spoiled from the one that Walter had commissioned in their house. It was big enough for them to stretch out together and had steps that allowed them to play in the tub. He loved that bath from the first time he had seen it when Walter brought him back from what he thought was his birthday present, a vacation trip to Mexico. Debbie's tub barely fit them both and there wasn't much room to actually wash. Walter was very willing to do all the work however so Alex lolled in his lover's arms, letting the hot bath relax him and soak away the smell of his fear until all he could smell was good clean flesh. "I love you," Alex said. Kissing his neck again, Walter swirled a washcloth around his nipple and said, "You know you rock my world, Alex. Love you more than life." That made Alex shudder. He said, "Don't fucking say that, Walt. Because I'm not going to live without you. Not one minute longer than it takes to follow you wherever you go." No argument. Walter said, "Then I will just have to live forever, Baby." That brought a smile to Alex's face. He said, "Even though I'm a wreck?" "Anyway you are," Walter said. "Just the same way you take me, even when I have those moods when I seem to have to beat on my chest to prove I'm a man. Even when I flashback to Vietnam and you have to peel me off the ceiling to get me to calm down. We take care of each other, Alex." "And you really know how to say the right thing," Alex said. Debbie pounded on the door at that point and said, "Soups on." "That's Mom," Alex remarked ruefully. "Always knows when to barge in." "It makes me feel good that you had someone like her when," Walter started. He grimaced and finished, "When you left me." Walter toweled him dry and Alex returned the favor. Sometimes he thought they were more familiar with each other's bodies than with their own. Finishing with a kiss, they were ready for soup and for Debbie. As ready as you could be for the Pittsburg hurricane. Debbie fussed at them all the way through the door. She didn't think they would change their minds about the hotel, especially not after Brian called to say he had wrangled the Taj Mahal of executive suites. The damn thing had a marble sunken bath! Debbie wondered if just maybe she could borrow that tub for an afternoon. A bubble bath in a grand tub like that should be worth some mileage with the other PFLAG moms. "Gone?" Vic asked. "Yeah," Debbie said. "Where's Rodney? Isn't he going to spend the night?" "We were going to go out," Vic said. "Might spend the night at his place. Will you be okay alone?" "I think I'll go check on Lex later," Debbie said. "He's having a rough time." "Alex has a lover now, Sis," Vic said. "He's going to turn to his Walter more often than he will to you." "Don't you fucking think I know that?" Debbie said. "Christ, what is it with all of you? Do you think I enjoy mothering the world?" Vic's smirk was answer enough. Yeah, her brother had her number, but Debbie was happier than she had been for ages. She might have only known Lex for a short time, but she had taken him deep with her heart. She was happy that he was with his Walter, but Alex was still hurting inside. He needed everyone in his corner that he could get. Narrowing her eyes, Debbie picked up the phone. There was someone who was her more than willing ally in any of her noble quests. Justin was as idealistic as she was. This time Stockwell was going all the way down. Walter had applied the best sedative in his bag of tricks. A good hard fucking had exhausted Alex to the point that the only muscles working on his body were the ones that had him smiling in his sleep. The suite had a separate working area and that was where Walter went. He had managed to get some words out of Alex, a bit more about what happened. His final comment was a huge surprise. He wanted Mulder to help and told Walter to go ahead and tell his former agent what happened. Walter kept his anger from his body and his voice, but he was fighting the urge to run through this town, confronting everyone and anything that might have hurt his lover. "Foxhole," Mulder's laconic voice answered. "What kind of flak you sending my way?" "Mulder, they're going to have your ass if you keep answering the phone that way," Walter lectured. "Not any more," Mulder remarked. "I finally learned to play dirty. I'm under serious protection. What's up, Walter?" "How busy are you?" Walter asked. "Not very," Mulder replied. "All the spooks and extry-terrestials seemed to be holiday. What can I do for you? Is your private haunt leaking ectoplasm?" Mulder thought it funny to pretend that Alex had really died. He persisted in claiming that Alex was a vampire or something and it had taken a shouting match to keep him from checking Walter's neck at odd intervals. Mulder had a child inside him that should have spent a century in a corner. "Get serious, Mulder," Walter said. "I need your help and... yes, it does happen to be about Alex." The sordid story spilled out. Thank God that Mulder decided to leap onto his white horse and don his knightly armor. "That reeks of the old days," Mulder said. "We can't let the guy get away with it. Is Alex willing to press charges or does he want us to go after this guy personally?" Mulder sounded almost as angry as Walter felt. He was glad that Alex had wanted Mulder's help. Alex's friends might be loving and they certainly wanted to help him, but Walter needed someone who he trusted to help him. Normally the only person he trusted this much was Alex, but his lover was hurting badly. Mulder could help investigate and help Walter protect Alex from Stockwell and his friends. "Well?" Mulder said, sounding impatient. "He says that it wouldn't be any use. It would be his word against Stockwell and who would believe him?" Walter replied. "I'm coming down. Get me a room," Mulder said. "Mulder?" Walter said. "Alex is not in good emotional shape. He stuffed this part of his past into a box and never dealt with it. He doesn't need your rapier wit slicing new wounds." "And I don't need you to tell me that," Mulder said. "I know how to work with victims and that's what Krycek is in this case. He wouldn't have asked for me if he didn't think I was the one who could help." "Thanks, Mulder," Walter said. "Yeah, I owe you, Walt," Mulder replied. Hanging up the phone, Walter took a deep breath. He had pushed Alex hard to get him to agree to at least try to build a case. Stockwell was still police chief. He had power. What he had done once could happen again and next time, the victim might not survive. Fucking hell. It felt like he was coming out of a three day drunk. His hole was still pulsing, a little sore from the prolonged fucking. He didn't want to move yet. He looked through his lashes toward his lover. Walter was on the phone again. It had been a mistake to tell him about the rape. If only he hadn't let Debbie's e-mail suck him in, bring him back here. All those years of trying to become a guy tough enough for what had happened to never happen again and Walter took it all away. How the hell did Walter do it? How did he get so far inside Alex that Alex had no defenses left. Walter always said he would take care of Alex. Walter always did. There was just some part of Alex that never believed that people you loved stayed. It just wasn't his experience. Still wearing nothing more than his tight white briefs, Walter said, "Mulder's on his way." What in fucking hell? Alex tumbled out of bed and said, "You sent for Mulder? You told Mulder!" Cringing inside, Alex could already hear Mulder's laughter. He had always had a way of getting under Alex's skin and saying things that hurt like hell. Like when Alex was sitting on that crate, all that boom boom under his ass. Mulder had been going on about how Alex was going to be raped in prison and Alex had just about freaked. It was just Mulder. Mulder had a big perve for the prison rape scene. Mulder needed to be fucked so badly so he would stop venting his frustration on people in his custody. Somehow those thoughts had not occurred to Alex at that time. He had been falling apart inside, remembering the night it happened and scared to death that the rest of his life was going to be like that, one rape after another. "Why Mulder?" Alex raged. "I don't want him here." Walter had this big dumb kicked dog expression on his face. He opened his mouth then closed it, his lips going tight. He said, "You asked for me to send for him. You said you wanted him to help us get Stockwell. You want me to call him back and say you changed your mind?" Oh shit, it was coming back to Alex now. He had done it. He had asked Walter to send for Mulder. Mulder was an asshole, but Alex respected him. He knew Mulder would hate what Stockwell stood for, the abuse of power, the hurting of innocents. Mulder would never let it go now. "I remember now," Alex said. "Come here, Walter, lie down with me. Hold me." Not wanting to talk, not wanting to do or think or experience anything, but the safety of his lover's arms, Alex lay back on the bed. Walter's scent, the familiar shape of his arm, the fur on his chest that bristled against Alex's face when he used him for a pillow were all that anchored him. "I can be strong enough for both of us," Walter said. Nice mind reading trick, Walter, Alex thought. Taking one deep breath after another, Alex fought with himself. He wasn't that kid anymore. He wasn't Lex. He was stronger. He had fought Spender. He had fought and helped defeat the aliens, the project, all those evil old men. He had lived through hell and he had come to a hard won paradise with the man he loved. There was just this last demon to face and Alex realized he wouldn't have to face it alone. He had his Walter. He had Debbie, Ted, Michael, and, like it or not, in a few hours, he would have Mulder on his side. Why did that scare the shit out of him? Walter thought that Alex should stay with Debbie when he picked Mulder up from the airport. The man said he was bringing equipment with him, enough to make the SUV Walter had rented the best idea for transportation. Besides, the drive would give Walter a chance to lay out a few facts...such as the fact that Mulder was to keep his mouth in check, treat Alex with respect as Walter's partner, and to work the case without any inappropriate comments to the victim or Mulder would find Walter's foot up his ass. All of that was a tall order for a man who was not mellowing with age. Mulder rode a tall horse now. He had won and he was the media darling, but that hadn't quite taken away the sting of all the years of being Spooky Mulder. If anything, Mulder didn't even try to be respectful to most of the upper ranks these days. They kept calling Walter and asking how to handle his wandering boy. They didn't get the answer they wanted. Mulder respected Walter because he had earned that respect. It hadn't come easy either. Alex however was just about as bullheaded as Mulder. He was going to the airport. He was not taking any shit from Mulder. This was his investigation more than it was anyone else's. "But it's snowing," Walter said. "And I lived in Russia in the winter," Alex said. "I'm going. That's it. And I'm not riding in back after we pick up Mulder!" Of course, Mulder wasn't riding in the back either. Alex ended up jammed in between his lover and his best enemy. Walter prayed that there were few red lights and that no one threw a punch with him behind the wheel on an icy road. However, Mulder wasn't seeing his old enemy. His eyes sparkled with the light of crusade. The man was a born fanatic. In another time, he would have been either burned for a witch or been the one that hunted them. With Mulder's luck, he would have been both. "I pulled as much as I could on the case. It's cold. They tried to hide as much as they could, but they haven't been up against the Gunmen. There's enough to build a pattern and it's not a pretty one," Mulder said. "It wasn't just Krycek and Jason Kemp. There have been other prosti...there were other rapes and they didn't all die. One of the kids lived, but he ended up in a psych ward. He's still there, completely withdrawn. "Krycek...Alex, we have to get this guy. He's like the old men. He's the kind of man my father was," Mulder said. He was turned toward Alex, his face very intense. "Men like him must not have power. He needs to pay for what he's done to those boys. He has to pay for what he did to you." Moving toward Walter, Alex said, "Like you care, Mulder." "Why the fuck would I jump on a plane and come if I didn't care?" Mulder spat. "I care about Walter and I know what hurts you, hurts him. You know I care about those kids. I don't like to see kids hurt." "Yeah, I know," Alex said. "I guess that's why I asked Walter even if I didn't remember it later." "You're having memory problems?" Mulder asked. Walter knew that Alex hated to admit to weakness, but finally he said, "Yeah, blacking out on some stuff." "Acute trauma," Mulder said. "You never had a chance to let yourself heal and now it's coming back around and hitting along side of the head." "Thanks for the diagnosis, Doc," Alex remarked. When Walter's lover and Fox Mulder were around each other, it was a school yard brawl in the making. This time, Mulder didn't let Alex goad him. He said, "Denial isn't going to work, Alex." Mulder grinned and said, "Neither is picking a fight with me going to distract me. You're going to get through this, all the way through with my help, whether you want it or not. First of all, we're going to punish the man who hurt you and then, Walter will help you heal." Maybe Mulder had his moments. Walter saw Alex slowly nod before leaning back, his right hand reached across to anchor on Walter's thigh. "No," Walter argued. "He told me everything. Why put him through it again?" They had been arguing every since coming back to the hotel. Alex sat on the bed, arms around his knees, uncharacteristically silent when it came to a discussion about his business. "Because he needs to be interviewed professionally," Mulder said. "Since when am I not a professional?" Walter asked. "I have years of experience on you." "You're his lover," Mulder said. "That's why in this case; you're not able to be objective. Let me do my job, Walter. That's why you both wanted me here." Walter hated it when Mulder was right. He fumed, standing in front of Alex as if to shield him from a physical threat. "He's right," Alex said. "I have to do this. I have to face it." "Where do you want to talk?" Walter asked, remembering that when Alex had told him, he wanted to be outside where he could pace and not feel trapped. "Safest place I can be," Alex said. "You hold me, Walter. Just hold me tight." "I will, Baby," Walter said. He jutted his jaw at Mulder, challenging him to react to the endearment. Mulder didn't take the bait. He carefully set up a tape recorder before taking a seat some distance from the bed where Alex chose to sit. Walter was wrapped around his lover, supporting him physically. Even so, Alex reached back to hold onto him. "Let's start with coming to Pittsburg," Mulder said. "Spender had just tried to kill you." Mulder had heard the story of how Spender tried to kill Alex a dozen times or more. The media had eaten every detail up and then broadcast them to the world. Spender's treatment of his men had probably contributed to his defeat. He tried to keep them in terror with the end result that they all secretly hoped for his death. "I hadn't slept much nor had much to eat," Alex said. "I didn't have any money. What little I had on me I spent getting this far. The trucker dropped me in front of Woody's. I guess he had some pretty good gaydar. Pegged me right away." Alex could remember everything that happened up to the time of the rape. How Woody's smelled of beer, peanuts, and horny guys... The look in the man's eyes when he looked at Alex still chilled Alex after all these years. He had seen Alex as prey, something he could use and discard, a toy to bring to the man he really wanted. "You weren't there, Mulder, it wasn't happening to you," Alex said. "I was desperate. The only reason I didn't lie down and die was because that was what Spender wanted." "I understand," Mulder said, nodding, his voice gentle. "Let's keep going. You walk into the place. What does it look like?" "A place, shabby, carpet on the floor," Alex said. "Paneling, it's a little crooked here and there. Staples not right. There's a card table, coffee rings on it. Old futon with some stains on the cover. I don't like the place. There was a smell..." "What kind of smell?" Mulder asked. "Blood? Decay? Mold?" "No, a strong cleaner like the guys who clean up crime scenes used," Alex said. "It was exactly like that." "Was the paneling like do it yourself home repair?" Mulder asked. "Yeah, the man who picked me up goes in the bathroom. I'm tired. I want to get the thing over because I'm getting cold feet. I'm wondering if I can con the guy so I don't really have to do anything. Why is he taking so long in the bathroom?" Alex said, his voice losing some of the rasp that afflicted it since the silo and the Tunguskan forest. His voice sounded more like the Alex that Mulder had first met. "What happened next, Alex," Mulder said, his voice gentle, almost seductive. "Hear something behind me when I'm looking out the window. He's going to...He hit me with something. I have to escape. I need help. My head!" Alex screamed, his eyes tightly squeezed. "It's all right, Alex. Remember, it's just the past," Mulder said. "You're here with Walter. You're safe." "Why does he have to go through this again?" Walter asked. "We need something, a handle, some way to find evidence," Mulder said. "Alex, let's go back now. Where are you when you wake up?" His voice continued to be very calm, monotone, almost hypnotic. "Handcuffed to a bed frame, someone's on top of me. Oh, fuck, he's raping me. No, I can't. I only let Walter do that! He's taking what belongs to Walter!" Alex said, moaning with the horror of his memories. "He can't touch what really belongs to Walter," Mulder said. "He can't take your love for Walter from you. Stay with me a bit, Alex. You were a good agent. You had a head for details. How tall was he?" "Two of them," Alex said. "One not so heavy. He's older. He has a harder time keeping it up. He pulls it out without coming. The other guy gets on me. He's tall, strong." "As tall as you?" Mulder asked. "Yeah, but he's heavy. He crushes me. Not fat heavy. Heavy like he works out a lot. Muscle. He smells like sweat. His hands are hard. Gun calloused. He shoots a lot and something else. Edge of his hand is hard, too," Alex said. "When he's done, the other guy gets back on me. Now he's really excited. He's fucking me so hard. Think it was watching the other guy. I'm all torn up. I'm bleeding all over. I think they want me dead." "Okay, Alex, you're doing fine," Mulder said. "What else do you remember?" "They put me in a body bag...no, I think it was just a big garbage bag. They dropped me on the floor and I'm scrabbling to get away. I don't want to die, not like this. I don't want be garbage. My hand scrapes something. It's metal. I look. It's a badge. It's a fucking police badge. These guys were cops!" Alex said. "Then one of them kicks me in the head. I go black for a moment, but I'm trying to hold on because if I pass out, I'm dead." "What happened to the badge?" Mulder said. "Did you take it?" "Yeah, when the other cops find me, maybe it will be evidence. I hold onto it tightly, but when they try to dump me, somebody turns on the lights. They drop me and I lost the badge," Alex said. "Shit," Mulder said. "That would be conclusive evidence." "I found it later," Alex said. "I put it under the roof of Michael's tree house. It might be still there," Alex said. "We'll look later," Walter said. "He's had enough. We're going to take a nap. You should get some rest too, Mulder." "No, I need a native guide," Mulder said. "Should I call this Debbie?" "Have Justin do it," Alex said wearily. "Justin is on a crusade to get Stockwell anyway." Curled up in Walter's arms, Alex seemed incredibly young and fragile. Walter held on tight, wishing he could have been there for his lover the first time. There was so much pain that they could have been spared. "I got good looking men coming out of the woodwork," Debbie crowed when Justin brought the new one over. The FBI agent smiled and said, "I'm glad to meet you, Mrs. Novotny. I'm Agent Mulder. Walter Skinner and Alex Krycek asked me to help out here." "You going to help us nail Stockwell?" Debbie asked. "Right into a coffin," Mulder said. "Alex remembered that he put a piece of evidence in Michael's tree house. I want to see if it's still there." "Sure, go right ahead," Debbie said. "It will ruin your suit thought. Neighborhood kids still use that place. I don't have the heart to stop them." Mulder had a very nice smile. Despite his crooked nose and pointy chin, he still was to die for. However, Debbie sniffed. Yeah, she thought he was playing for the other team, too. Damn, what did she do? Exude some kind of chemical attractant for gay men? You would have thought the man was twelve the way he went up that tree. Justin followed, taking his time to appreciate the view. Brian had just what he deserved in that brat, Debbie thought, two birds of a feather. Climbing around as if he was part monkey, Mulder almost fell out of the tree to search the top of the tree house. He said, "Mrs. Novotny?" "Call me Deb!" Debbie said. "Good grief, I'm not that old!" "You said that kids play in here? We need to talk to them. See if any of them found something, a badge," "Okay, I'll get them when they come home from school," Debbie said. "Just ask them if they found a toy badge," Mulder said. "Give them this if they can find it." Mulder waved a ten dollar bill at Debbie. "They would do it for a dollar, too," Debbie remarked. "Money don't grow on trees." The man just grinned at her. Walter's arm had gone numb long ago, but he was afraid to move. Alex was asleep in his arms, tender lips parted, eyelids dusky with sleep, eyelashes so long and thick that Walter still couldn't believe they were real. One of Alex's fists curled loosely against Walter's chest. Walter would have been willing to hold his lover forever. His lover stirred now, startling, but then as he saw Walter, Alex's face relaxed. "Hey," Alex said. "Hey, sleeping beauty," Walter said. "Mulder on the job?" Alex asked. "Yes, he didn't want to wait for you. He went to search the tree house," Walter explained. "Always so fucking impatient," Alex said. Stretching out, Alex said, "Walter, I want to go see that kid." "What kid?" Walter asked. "The one that cracked up after being raped," Alex said. "That's not a good idea," Walter said. "I want to do it," Alex insisted. He shook his head and said, "No, I need to do it. I have to do it with you or without you." "I don't think you can just go waltzing in and ask to see a minor mental health patient," Walter cautioned. "I bet Tekumi could get me in," Alex replied. "Tekumi probably knows about the kid. Face it, Walter. I love how you take care of me, but I'm Krycek. I know how to make things happen." Alex smiled at Walter. "When I remember that I'm not Lex anymore. It's been a long time since I was that frightened kid." Walter said. "All right. You may not believe this, but I love you. I love all of you, not just my Baby. I love the man you are. I love the man you were." Kissing Alex's hand, Walter raised his eyes to meet Alex's. "I believe you," Alex said. Getting up, Alex groaned and said, "I hope they don't notice that I'm walking funny when we get there." "Jesse, someone is here to see you," Tekumi said. The boy didn't move. Long hair hid his face. His arms were scarred, mottled with track marks, straight scars that Alex had seen on more than one wrist when he had been in group care for a while between foster homes. There were pocked round craters, older than the other wounds that Alex recognized as cigarette burns, and twisted scars that showed the kid had been tied tight and had fought the ropes desperately. Alex's left wrist would have been scarred like that from the cuffs if it had not rotted in Tunguska. "Jesse, these men want to talk to you," Tekumi said. Alex moved around in front of the kid. The only thing that showed he was alive and aware was a subtle withdrawal. The boy wore a clean white tee shirt and faded Levis. His tennis shoes were white, too; cheap cloddish things no teenager would wear willingly. They had Velcro straps, no laces. Kid was a suicide risk. Animal eyes gazed from beneath the shaggy bangs. Alex said, "You have to fight it, kid. You put yourself in a cage in your head and they won. You never let them win." A hand came out, exploring Alex's face before the kid threw himself across the room, trying to cram under the bed that was fastened to the wall. Tekumi shook his head when the orderly brought a needle. "Give him a chance to come out of it on his own," Tekumi said. "Come on, Alex, I'll walk you and Walter out." Nodding at the orderly, Tekumi said, "Just watch him. He's been able to calm himself more often recently." Tekumi borrowed a friend's office to talk. He moved around, pouring coffee, opening the blinds, while he waited for Alex to talk. "That could have been me," Alex said. "You mean after what happened?" Tekumi said. "No, I mean if I hadn't had halfway decent foster parents," Alex said. "If I hadn't been caught every time I ran. What's the kid's background?" "Severe physical and sexual abuse in the home," Tekumi said. "Placed in foster care at ten, but it didn't work out. Too much for foster parents to handle. Moved twenty-seven times until one day he walked out of the state foster care office and no one went looking. Arrested six times for solicitation. It didn't stop him. Nothing stopped him until the day he picked up the wrong john. They found him in a dumpster with the belt of a robe around his neck. I suppose they thought he was dead or just didn't care. He lived, but he's never talked about what happened. He says a few words now and again. Likes to play video games. Other than that, he sits in that room and lives in his nightmare." "Fuck," Walter said. "Fucking bastards." "Yes," Tekumi said. "You have that right." "It's going to happen," Alex said. "We're going to get Stockwell for what he did to that kid." "For what he did to you too, Alex," Walter reminded. "Maybe," Alex said. He stood up, handed Tekumi a handful of cash and added, "Buy the kids a Play Station and a shit load of games. Some new shoes, too. Have to be something that looks like a kid would wear that doesn't have laces. I hated it when I wore shoes like that when I was a foster kid." Mulder's round up hadn't helped. He was still at Debbie's though, half-way through what looked like more than a quarter of a cherry pie. "Jesus, Mulder, you're going to get fat," Alex remarked. Then looking at Debbie, he said, "Mom, any more of that?" "You bet, sit right down," Debbie said. "Right out of the oven with the best vanilla ice cream on the planet." "Alex doesn't like vanilla," Mulder said, muffled from a big bite. "Mulder," Walter warned. "I warned you." "It's okay, Walter," Alex said, "It's just the way he is." Under his breath, Alex added, "An asshole." "Angel," Debbie said. "Be good. Mulder's trying to help you." "Angel?" Mulder said, almost choking on his pie. "Here let me help you," Walter said, pounding on Mulder's back hard enough to render him speechless for a few minutes. The pie distracted Alex and Mulder went back to filling his face as well, making little noises of ecstasy as he ate. Peace and quiet, Walter thought, not to mention a damn good cherry pie. After they ate, Alex insisted on looking himself. Of course, he did. Walter thought that he would have died of stress faster if the two of them had stayed partners. They would have driven him nuts! Climbing down, Alex had cobwebs in his hair. A crow cawed at him, sounding very pissed off. Laughing, Debbie said, "Never mind him. He and his mate nest at the top of that tree. He thinks he owns the place." Walter contented himself with dusting off his lover, smoothing dead leaves, the cobwebs, and a smudge of tree resin from Alex's face. "It's been a long time since you put that badge there," Mulder said, "Could be some older kid took the badge and moved away." "I did have it," Alex said. "I put it there." "Yeah, I believe you," Mulder said. "Justin and I are going to go talk to some street kid that Michael has hanging around. I'm curious as to whether Stockwell has totally abandoned his behavior since his partner died or if it continues." "He's been in the public eye," Debbie said. She shook her head and one of her large and flashy earrings flew from her ears. Before Debbie could get it, the crow flew down and grabbed it. Alex chased the bird, trying to save it, but the bird flew just out of reach until he surged upwards and landed at the top of a telephone pole. He sat there with the earring in his claw, cawing at them in triumph. "Damn bird steals everything," Debbie remarked, taking the other earring from her ear. Mulder scooped up a small rock, balanced it in his palm, grinned, and spun back to lob it at the bird, almost scoring a direct hit. The earring fell and Alex finished the good deed by rescuing it from the branches of a rosebush. "There you go," Mulder said. "See, Walter, we can work together. This is how it's going to be. We're all three going to pull together and get Stockwell. He's going to jail for a long, long time." This time, Mulder avoided the obvious and refrained from painting one of his Bubba cellmate scenarios. They returned to the house where Justin waited. "I'm going to go interview that kid," Mulder said. "I think it's better to keep it to just Justin and myself. If he gives us any leads, we'll go talk to some of the street hustlers who might have run into Stockwell or his partner." "Alex and I going to go out," Walter said. "I want to get his mind off things for a while." Walter gave his lover a look that told him that there wasn't going to be an argument. "We promised Emmett that we would go to Babylon with him. We're going." "Only if you dance with me," Alex said, smiling at Walter. "You got it," Walter promised. "We're going to relax and forget about everything for the night." Mulder and Justin walked down the street toward Michael and Ben's building. Mulder thought the young man was very handsome, almost prettier than Krycek. He also knew that Justin was spoken for. Furthermore, Mulder kept telling himself that now was not the time to question if how straight he was. Standing beside Justin as they waited for the door to open, Mulder thought briefly about taking the lithe young body in his arms... "Fuck, what?" came the shout from inside the apartment. The door was yanked open by a thin, blond man dressed only in his white briefs. "What the fuck do you want, twink-boy?" he asked. "Hunter, this is Special Agent Fox Mulder of the F.B.I. He wants to talk to you. Are Michael and Ben home?" Justin asked. "Hunter? Who's at the door?" Ben called out, coming out of the kitchen. "Justin...what's going on?" "Hi, Ben. This is Special Agent Fox Mulder. He wants to talk to Hunter about Jason Kemp." "Fuck no," Hunter stated, retreating into the apartment. "I talked to enough people about that little fag." Ben invited the two men in and served the water they agreed to. Hunter had slammed his bedroom door closed, which wouldn't stop Mulder. Michael came out of the other bedroom and looked up at Mulder. "Um...Justin?" "I'm Special Agent Fox Mulder of the F.B.I," Mulder announced, pulling his badge out. "I'm investigating the serial rapes and murders in this area over the last decade. I was told that Hunter, your foster son, knew one of the victims, and had helped find one of the suspects." "Hunter has stopped hustling," Ben announced. "He's a good kid." "I'm not denying that or implying otherwise," Mulder explained. "But I believe that Jason Kemp's murderers, and Alex Krycek's rapists are the same men. Now, regardless of the fact that Ken Reichert is dead, there is another man out there who very well may have helped in Jason Kemp's murder, and also in Alex's rape and attempted murder." "So, what?" Michael questioned. "The F.B.I. comes out for stuff like this?" The look on Michael's face was three steps past dubious. "The serial nature of the crimes warrants the bureau to investigate. I will be enquiring with the local police as to why the bureau was not consulted when a pattern was detected." "I wouldn't do that," Ben interjected. "Ken Reichert and the chief of the Pittsburgh PD were once partners. You will be shut down." "Mister...." "Bruckner. Professor Ben Bruckner." They shook hands briefly. "Professor Bruckner, I am not just some green agent sent here to appease the community..." "I know who you are, Agent Mulder," Ben said, gently. "Please, call me Ben." "Ben, then just call me Mulder, as everyone does. If you know who I am, you know that a lot of people owe me favors, and my name carries a lot of weight. Personally, I don't really care. It never appealed to me to be famous. I just wanted the truth. This situation is exactly the same to me. I will treat this..." "The way you looked for your sister?" Hunter asked, peeking out of his doorway. Mulder turned toward the boy, who had dressed, and said, "Yes. I already think of Alex as a brother. He and I have...connections that go deeper than duty to my position. I want to catch the second man who hurt him." "OK, then, sit down, cuz I know a lot of guys who Reichert fucked," Hunter said. Alex stepped out of the shower and dried himself thoroughly. He had laid out all of his clothes and was excited to get on with their night out at Babylon. He was going to wear his tightest black jeans, his emerald silk shirt, and his Ferragamo ankle-height boots, the buttery soft black leather ones that were perfect for dancing. He rubbed the sparkle-version of Calvin Klein's Escape for men on his skin, knowing Walter thought it was silly, but thinking that being in Pittsburgh, with his friends, he felt just a little fey. The inner queen that he tried to keep down seemed to want to run out screaming on Liberty Avenue. Walter was already dressed and in the outer lounge of the room. They had splurged and rented a suite, which was the only room that came with a Jacuzzi tub as they required. Their room had an actual wet bar with a fully stocked refrigerator, meaning fresh fruit and vegetables to snack on, several kinds of frozen meals to heat up in the microwave oven they provided, or there was some rudimentary cookware if one wanted to make a meal the old fashioned way. You make yourself a home there, at least on a temporary basis. When he emerged, Walter stood from the chair he occupied, watching the news. "Wow, you look fantastic!" he exclaimed, walking toward Alex. "You look pretty great yourself," Alex said, falling into Skinner's arms. The man was simply dressed in a tight black t-shirt and faded blue jeans. He wore his favorite cowboy boots, as well. "You are going to make everyone at Babylon drool, Walt. I know it. Just be prepared, it's all dance music." "I know, sweetie. I've been to a few of those." He smiled and kissed Alex's lips. "So...when we go home, I can take you to Flashers? Or Boy-Boy?" Those were two of the top gay dance clubs in the DC metro area. Alex had always been afraid to ask Walter to go, but going to Babylon might whet his appetite to go to other clubs. "I may be persuaded, yes," he said. Alex knew that one of Walter's main pleasures was pleasing his lover. And Alex, a bit spoilt at this point in his life, tried to match if not top his lover's antics. "God, let's get out of here, it's already after ten," Alex announced. They grabbed their leather jackets and went for the SUV. They parked in the back of the club, as Brian always had, and walked around to the front. Alex was positive after ten years, the bouncers at the door would be different. He was wrong. "Holy fucking shit! Lex! Sexy Lexy! You're back!" the big, bald black man said. "Warner! You're still here!" Alex shouted and hugged the man. Walter came quickly up behind the embracing men and waited impatiently for the scene to end. "Warner, this is my boyfriend, Walter. Walter, this is the man who had pity on me oh so many years ago and let me into this joint." The men shook hands. "Are you dancing for us tonight?" Warner asked. "I'm dancing..." Alex started. "But he only dances for me now," Walter finished. Alex looked back at him, a bit annoyed. 'Didn't I just introduce you as my boyfriend?' Alex thought to himself. 'Relax, this is my old stomping ground.' Alex also noticed a possessive hand creeping around his waist. Walter would have to understand that Babylon-Alex liked to show off. Warner allowed them to cut the line, not even asking Alex for his membership card, and then allowing Walter to enter as well, with a bow. They walked down the long dark tunnel that led to the club. The music was pumped so loud, it shook Alex's ribcage. When they entered, the site was one of familiarity and almost comfort. Men danced with other men so sexually, it never ceased to amaze Alex that they weren't fucking on the dance floor. Of course, there was the occasional public blowjob, but other than that, it was what he remembered. He grabbed Walter's hand and they made their way to the bar to order drinks. He leaned over to shout to Walter, "So what do you think?" "It looks like all the other clubs I've been to in my life. Tokyo, Hong Kong, London, Paris, New York, L.A.; Sharon loved these places, you knew that." Alex looked up at Walter with a bit of an annoyed look. This was the past he never talked about. Walter never really pried, since he wasn't exactly open either. They stood there for a few minutes until Brian, Michael, Ben and Emmett joined them. Justin reluctantly trailed behind them. Immediately, Brian pasted himself to Alex's side and laid his head on Alex's shoulder. "Brian, stop, you'll make your boyfriend jealous," Alex shouted over the music. "I don't have a boyfriend," he shouted back, ignoring Justin. "I just fucked him more than once." "Well, my boyfriend will not allow me to fuck you twice, so ease up, sweetie," Alex warned. "Oh, come on, let's fucking dance!" With that, Brian grabbed Alex's hand and pulled him onto the dance floor. Alex looked back to try and find Walter, but they were swallowed by the sweaty, gyrating bodies and Walter was lost in a sea of faces. 'Que sera sera,' Alex thought and pulled Brian against him. The songs flowed into one another without any real break or change in melody. Dance music wasn't very defined anyway. They began moving together, picking up the beat and grinding their bodies together. The last ten years melted away and it was as if they were twenty-something again. At that time, Alex was almost thirty-something, but he would never tell the truth. After what Alex thought was fifteen minutes or so, which turned out to be an hour, a hand on Alex's shoulder pulled him off the dance floor back to the bar. "What the fuck, Walt?" he shouted. "I was enjoying myself!" "I would like to spend some time with you, too, Alex!" he shouted back. The volume of the music was beginning to try Walter's tolerance. "You live with me, Walt," he reminded. "I haven't seen these people in ten years. I've been with you nonstop for the last few years. You think you can calm your jealousy for a night, maybe?" Alex thought a moment that he might be acting like a queen on the rag, but Walter was being a little overbearing. Hopefully, the man would step off a little. He did more than that. "OK, Alex, you have your cardkey, see you back at the hotel." With that, Walter turned and walked out of the club. Alex stood there, staring at his back and just watched the retreating back of his lover. 'Fuck him,' he thought. Walter couldn't believe that Alex was being such an ass. Did Alex honestly think he would stand around and watch him dry hump that Brian all night long on the dance floor? If he did, he had another things coming. There was a hand on his wrist. Walter turned, smile blossoming at the thought of Alex chasing him to say he was sorry. When Walter turned, it wasn't Alex holding his hand. "Walter! Where are you going?" Emmett drawled. "The night is young, you should be dancing!" "My lover wants to dance with someone else," he said, sadly. "I should just go and let him have his fun." "What? Come on, dance with me, you'll feel much better!" Emmett pulled Walter onto the dance floor just as another hard-pumping tune started. Walter wasn't a regular dancer, thinking himself old and awkward. Emmett just let go and began to move. Walter watched him move for a moment and then thought, what the hell! It felt good to dance, let go, gyrate his entire body to the music. Emmett moved with him, and when their bodies touched, immediately Walter knew it was a mistake. Emmett was grinding on him, then lips touched his neck and he had to pull away. Emmett gave him a questioning look, but Walter just shook his head and made his way back to the bar. A scotch in his hand, two sips already burning down his throat, had Walter starting to get a hold of himself. He was faithful. Even kissing on the dance floor, to him, was a betrayal. He would not just hook up with Emmett to strike a blow at Alex, he wasn't that petty. He was, however, getting more and more jealous by the moment. Brian did not have the same boundary issues that Walter had, and Alex wasn't exactly in a hurry to exercise their rules about tricking. Walter stood there and watched, with the feelings of hurt, infidelity, and sheer rage washing over him, each wave canceling the other. It was as if Alex, in his search for catharsis, was taking Walter down to hell with him. Walter needed to piss. He headed for the back room to make his way through to the bathroom. Alex wasn't sure, but he knew Brian had shoved a popper under his nose. He knew Brian was picky with his drugs, considering he was a business man, so just the once wouldn't really hurt anything. The buzz filled his head, making everything expand and vibrate, spreading down his neck into his body, making everything feel good and his skin more sensitive to the hands that caressed his body. "Come on, let's go to the back room," Brian said in his ear. Ah, the back room at Babylon. He'd never been there to stay. He watched once, passed through to the john, but in all the time he'd spent in the club, he had never partaken of physical pleasure there. Brian's hand on his wrist was insistent as he dragged a still-dancing Alex to the back. Head still swimming from the drug, Alex followed. Brian pressed him against a bare space of wall and tried to kiss his mouth. Alex did not want to make out with Brian, though, for some reason. The back of his mind kept shouting, "This is not Walter! This is not Walter!" Alex shook his addled head and looked back at Brian. The tall, dark, beautiful man stood there, swaying to the music, sucking on his own bottom lip, waiting for Alex to make a decision. What in the hell was he doing? He wanted to fuck Brian again, badly. He loved the feel of Brian's lean muscles, his hip bones protruding, ribs that were always prominent even though he was in fine health. Except for height, physically, Brian was the exact opposite of Walter, with his thick muscles softened by age with the tiniest layer of fat, due to the cooking the men enjoyed doing together. Alex knew every wrinkle in his face, every scar on his body, ever ticklish spot and erogenous zone... With a shove to his shoulders, Alex eluded Brian's embrace and started out of the back room. He charged straight out onto the dance floor. He found what he was looking for, Walter shaking his booty with Emmett. Although he could see Emmett trying desperately to get closer to Walter, he knew his lover too well and saw the subtle movements to move Emmett back. A wave of guilt washed over Alex and he knew he needed to treat Walter with the same consideration the big man fawned over him. >From behind, he slid his hands around Walter's back and pressed his body against the large frame. Two big paws covered his clasped hands and pulled Alex tighter. They moved together like that, sliding their bodies against one another, Alex pressing his erection into Walter's ass. Pulling slightly away, Walter turned in Alex's arms to face him. He pressed his lips to Alex's ear and whispered, "I knew it was you. I'd know your hands anywhere." The song changed, flowing into a slower tempo, and the men began to grind against one another. Their lips met and their kiss lasted through the end of that song. When the tempo changed and went up again, Alex pulled Walter off the dance floor toward the bar. "Let's get a drink, then go to the back room. I'm sure you'd love to see it." "I saw it. I passed through going to the john." "What did you see?" Alex asked and turned to get two beers for them. "I saw you, and Brian. I saw him trying to kiss you, and you turning your head." The look in Walter's eyes was unreadable to Alex, but he knew that Walter felt both betrayed and relieved by what he saw. "I didn't kiss him. And I didn't let him suck me. Yes, I still have feelings for Brian, but it was just sex. It was only ever sex. And it would only ever *be* sex. With you, I can't even describe the depth of my love, Walter. I swear, I will never hurt you like that again." Alex did his best to convey all of his love into his eyes, trying desperately to make Walter understand that the impulses that pulled him back and forth were not meant to hurt him. Sometimes, he just didn't know how to stop himself, but giving in to the impulses seemed to be helping him. Walter's lips met his and they shared a deep kiss, not caring who was watching. When they pulled away, Justin had appeared, with Mulder in tow. Behind them, Michael and Ben brought up the rear. Mulder was dressed casually, almost too casually. He wore his favorite Knicks t-shirt with the bit torn out when he tricked Luther Lee Boggs, well-worn jeans and his black Air Jordan sneakers. Alex leaned in to Walter and said, "Can I fuck with Mulder?" Walter turned to him, brows coming down in a scowl. "Not fuck him, fuck WITH him. Just to mess with his head." "He's helping us, Alex. Maybe you should be nice to him?" Alex knew Walter was right, but he couldn't help himself. He grabbed Walter's hand and pulled them back out onto the dance floor, motioning to Justin to bring Mulder out as well. Mulder was thankful that Hunter had given him so much information about Kenneth Reichert and the other hustlers who had had him as a trick. The next day he would start looking for the boys who usually sold their wares starting at lunch. It would take some of the Mulder trust money to get them to open up, but it wasn't anything Mulder hadn't done before. He was surprised that Justin asked Mulder to come to the dance club with him. What would that mean? A gay dance club? Mulder had been to clubs all over London, gay, straight and mixed when he was in college. It would be nice for a change to go somewhere that he didn't have to be all wound up. Mulder ignored Justin's dubious appraisal of his clothing and drove the young man in his economy rental to Babylon. "Any chance this place we're going *isn't* harkening to the Bible-fabled city of sin?" "No chance whatsoever. It's truly a sinful place. Although, I once danced there wearing an angel's costume." Justin seemed proud of the fact that he used to be a club dancer. Mulder decided he'd make his final assessment when he entered the club. He was far from shocked. It looked like any other club he'd been to, minus the scantily-clad women. The scantily clad men were a refreshing change, though. Hard bodies shaking and swaying and not a jiggle to one of them. Mulder understood why gay men would come to a place like this. He followed Justin to the bar where he saw Skinner and Alex, both dressed in tighter, more appropriate clothing, and boots, which he wished he'd brought with him. They were standing so close to each other, Alex's arms wrapped around Walter's neck. Mulder didn't change expressions, knew he could keep the unaffected, bland look on his face, having practiced to do so when he thought he'd be a psychologist. He tried hard not to stare, but just had to give in. No matter how long Walter and Alex stayed together, and no matter how many times he saw them be physical with each other, it would still strike an odd chord inside him that this was his former boss and his former double-crossing partner, and they were fucking. Yes, he'd come to terms with the reasons behind Alex's betrayals, and knew that the ends did justify the means, otherwise the human race was doomed. It still unnerved him occasionally when they held each others' hands, or kissed, or Alex sat on Walter's lap. It was innocuous, but Mulder still had to consciously remind himself that they were actually in love and it wasn't Alex manipulating Walter. He was learning to keep that thought at the forefront of his brain. "Mulder! I didn't see you as a gay clubber. Nice to see you're not a bigot." The look on Alex's face was of pure impishness. "No, Alex, I'm not. This isn't the first gay club I've been to," he shouted back, warranting impressed expressions from Brian, Justin and Emmett. "In London, the clubs aren't this decadent, though. At least, they weren't in the times when I went to them, in college. I *did* go to Oxford, you know." Mulder hated saying that. He almost never waved his Ph. D. around, but if Alex wanted to be a bitch, he could bitch right back. Emmett seemed to like that Mulder had a brain. He came over to Mulder, slipped his arm around Mulder's shoulders and said, "We need to take a spin around the dance floor. I've had Alex, Walter, and now I need to have you." Emmett's gap-tooth smile had a pixie-like quality to it, Mulder thought fleetingly, until the words 'have you' sunk in. "Have me? I think you'll be disappointed when you find I'm straight." "I meant, have you on the dance floor. Wanna dance, sexy?" Emmett nuzzled Mulder's ear a bit. "Lead the way," Mulder said, taking Emmett's hand. He looked back to see Alex and Walter followed by Brian and Justin making their way out onto the dance floor. Mulder hadn't danced in a long time, really let go and get sweaty dancing. So he let go and danced with Emmett, and it felt good. Two hands came about Mulder's waist from behind and grabbed at the tail of his t-shirt. It was whipped over his head in seconds and lost in the crowd of dancing men. The two hands alighted on his hips and pulled him back against someone's groin. Concerned for his safety, Mulder turned to look directly into the cheeky smile of Brian, and knew he was officially welcomed. As he danced, he let the music and the heavy bass beat move him. It was liberating. There was no Scully telling him he was nuts, there was no Consortium telling him he was never going to find his sister, and there were no aliens threatening to cull the planet of humans. No, this time, there were only friendly hands accepting him as is, making him feel warm and welcome. If he could remember this feeling for the rest of his life, he would be a happy man. After a while, and two more beers that Brian pressed into his hand, Mulder's bladder made itself known to him. He pulled away and yelled to Emmett, "Where's the little boys' room?" "The whole place is a little boy's room, Mulder. Can I call you Fox?" Emmett winked at Mulder. "No, sorry. The last person who called me that was my mother. The john?" Mulder looked at Emmett with the schooled expression on indifference. Emmett pointed to an open steel door labeled "Back Room". "It's there?" "Through the back room, past all the...loungers..." Emmett turned and grabbed the arm of a handsome man and spun back out onto the dance floor. Mulder walked toward the back room and right away he knew he was making a mistake. As he walked past the bar, he looked for Walter, or even Alex, to go with him, but they were nowhere to be found. The last thing he needed was to sort out an investigation for the attempted rape of a federal officer. After taking a last deep breath, Mulder entered the back room. Right away, he knew he didn't belong. The heavy stench of sex, sweat and smoke hung in the air, only overpowered by the groans and moans of the men who were having sex. The agent warred with the man; should he do something about the hoard of naked bodies coupling in public, or should he just go piss? He opted to piss. As he shook off and washed his hands, he was amazed. No one approached him, more than a look or a touch on his shoulder, that is. He shrugged off the hand and politely said, "No thanks." The others just watched him go past. He was impressed and scratched out another stereotype from his list. As he rounded the last corner, he saw a man standing against a wall that he'd missed when he was going in. The man had his head back, mouth open in a silent scream of ecstasy. There was another man kneeling before him, head bobbing into the crotch in front of him. Mulder was drawn like a moth to a flame, and knew that this situation would burn him so deep that the scars would mark him forever. He watched his former superior officer, his friend and confidant, get a blowjob from the man Mulder still had mixed feelings about. Alex's hands rose and roamed over Walter's torso as he continued to fellate his lover. After an indeterminate amount of time, Walter jerked in orgasm. Alex remained in position for a few more minutes, then stood and kissed Walter. As they pulled apart, Mulder and Walter made eye contact. Mulder could feel the flush in his face, even if no one could see it in the murky backroom. He spun around and made a beeline for the bar again. Mulder ordered a bottle of water, hoping to calm himself. He needed to sober up and get out of Babylon and fast. Walter made his way over to where Mulder stood and ordered his own water. "Mulder, are you OK? I...I..." "Sir, please, don't say anything. I shouldn't have stared. You're acting appropriately in your surrounding. I'm the man out of place. I...God, Walter. I mean, I know you two are together and happy. I just...I never imagined you two...together. And seeing it slammed it home. I mean, I still have nightmares seeing my father dying, bleeding in my arms, you know? And I know that Bill Mulder was planning to have me murdered, but...I just...I'm sorry. I shouldn't be dumping all this on you." Walter placed a friendly hand on Mulder's shoulder and squeezed. "Apart from my relationship, you are my friend, Fox." Mulder turned abruptly at the use of his first name. "We should talk about this, just you and I alone. But not tonight. Go back to the hotel and get some rest. That's where Alex and I are going. Do you need a ride?" Mulder shook his head. "I have a rental. I'm gonna finish my water and then go. Thanks, Walter." "No problem, Mulder." Mulder understood that Walter went back to the last name to put Mulder back in a comfort zone. Walter was one of the most caring and intelligent men Mulder knew. And Alex was lucky to have Walter as his lover. When Alex emerged from the back room and draped his arms about Walter's shoulders, kissing the bigger man's cheeks, Mulder understood that Alex knew exactly how good he had it. "I want you to make mad, passionate love to me," Alex said. His hand slid back to its favorite position between Walter's legs. "Your wish is my command," Walter replied. He glanced over at Alex and almost ran into the car in front of him. He didn't want to take his eyes off his lover. Alex had shining eyes, shining hair, and his cheeks blushed pink still from the exertion of dancing, from the attention of so many handsome men, and from the delights of swallowing Walter's cock in public. Although Walter hadn't confessed, it was the first time he'd ever had sex in public. He didn't know if he wanted to repeat the experience, but it had been hot, incredibly hot. He saw the attraction, the spice of being watched, envied, and lusted after. He almost felt as if he was having a blowjob from the entire room. Sparing a hand to cover Alex's, Walter said, "That little episode in the backroom was just a taste. When I get you in private, you're going to feel like the entire room had you." Eyes peeking from beneath the languor of veiled lashes, Alex sighed and said, "But only you, Walter, I promise. For the rest of our lives...forever." Joy and sorrow exploded through Walter. Joy because he heard the love and the passion in Alex's voice. Sorrow because he was older and because he had not had this sooner. Alex looked at Walter and said, "Hey, there, lover. We're here. We're fucking here. When you think how many times death called our names, something kept us alive, something kept us from killing each other until we were back where we belonged, back with each other . . ." "Remind me to kiss each one of these people, everyone that glued you back together," Walter said. "Even Brian?" Alex teased. "Even him," Walter said. "But if I kiss him, that doesn't mean that you get to." "Only you," Alex said. "Already said that. I admit it. I like the way that people looked at me in that club. I like the way that I am free of my history here. Nothing matters but me and these people, Brian, Michael, Mom, Ted, and Tekumi; they care about me without all the history I have with everyone else. I owe them for what they did for me. They mean a lot to me. They love me." "Not as much as I do," Walter said as they pulled up in front of the hotel. Going around to open Alex's door for him, Walter welcomed an armful of his lover. Damn, the boy was heavy! Manfully, Walter took the weight, wishing that he could carry Alex up to their room. They kissed and groped their way into the lobby, onto the elevator...Alex holding the door open for him this time. When they reached their room, Walter summoned his inner chi and swept his lover off his feet, staggering to the bed before they both tumbled down onto it, clothing flying in all directions as if one of Mulder's beloved X Files was involved. "I love your shoulder, this inside thing, whatever you call it..." Walter muttered though his kisses. "Scully would know," Alex teased, "I could give her a call and..." "No way in hell," Walter replied. "Love your arm, your neck, your tit..." "I don't have a tit!" Alex said in mock outrage, "unless some thing has changed a lot there since the last time I looked." "Your nipple," Walter said, "so cute, so hard, so..." Anything further was buried in Alex's flesh. "I like where this is going," Alex growled. "Keep going, bald man. I am so glad you have big ears, big lovely ears that I can use to..." "No hurry, we have all night," Walter reproved, his tongue finding Alex's belly button a moment later. He hummed. "I can feel you smiling," Alex said. "Am I missing something about that tune?" "Must have missed a few vital pieces of information along the way in school," Walter said before going back to humming Battle Hymn of the Republic. There was no lightening yet, but the terrible swift sword was developing nicely. "What'cha doing?" Alex asked, noticing Walter was alternating tongue action with a peculiar motion. "Getting ready," Walter said. "Oh, I thought," Alex replied. "Kind of thought you'd want on top." "Later," Walter answered. "on top, bottom, hell, just lying in bed next to you." He hadn't always liked the taste of come, but he liked the taste of Alex, liked the way that Alex made those begging sounds. Walter stopped just before he knew from experience that Alex was going to lose it. He smirked as he pulled away to finish preparing himself. "I'm going to ride you," Walter said. "Yeah? Guarantee I'll buck," Alex said with a grin. Green eyes devoured him as Walter lowered himself onto his lover's cock. Alex steadied himself as Walter guided him inside. They knew each other so well, every move, every breath, every sigh, was in unison. Funny, Walter never saw himself as a beautiful man until he saw himself in Alex's eyes. People talk about getting lost in their lover's eyes; Walter found himself. Rising up slowly, Alex following him, thrusting upwards, Walter smiled down at his lover before taking it back down. Alex's mouth opened, gasped, his eyes fluttered closed for a moment before opening again, lashes fluttering, a hard exhalation celebrating the seismic events within. His hands reached to hold onto Walter, tug him back down. Walter obeyed, relishing the feeling of total control as he rode his lovers cock. "Faster," Alex gasped. "Beg me," Walter invited. "Please. Please. Please," Alex uttered, each repetition louder and more prolonged until the last word was a howl of animal need. "Don't mind if I do," Walter said, grinning at Alex's complete surrender to him. He stepped up the pace. He couldn't have managed this for much longer anyway despite all those exercises at the gym. Alex usually liked to jack him when he was on top, but at the moment, only seemed capable of holding on to him. His lover's head rolled across the pillow, his mouth open, his eyes so dilated with pleasure that the green was nearly obscured. Walter could almost have come from the sensations within him or from the sight of his lover lost in bliss, but the need was too urgent. He closed his eyes, sucking deep breaths of air as he stroked himself to the rhythm of his rise and fall on Alex's cock. He could feel it inside himself when Alex was ready to come, could feel the way the thrusts upward became wild and then the stillness before he felt the heat even through the condom. Arching back, he opened his eyes to see his come splatter across Alex's sweating chest, marking him, claiming him, and perhaps that was why he wanted to do it this way. Carefully rising up from Alex, forgetting for the moment that Alex now had two arms, Walter helped his lover keep the condom on. Exhausted, riding the aftershocks of pleasure, Walter rolled to the side. Alex turned to nestle to him, his arm around Walter's chest, his face buried in Walter's neck. "If it gets better than that, I'm going to forget to breathe," Alex said. "Mmm," Walter said, not one for chatter after sex. He didn't even feel like cleaning up. Alex would probably see to it later. The nice thing about male lovers is that they often went to sleep after sex, too. Morning, Alex was face down on the bed, round bottom in the air, as much as to say 'fuck me'. The bedding had slipped to one side; a small section of blanket draped across one leg and the rest had fallen nearly to the floor. His pillow was clutched in his arms like a lover and his hair was in black sweat-curls at the base of his neck. Alex didn't wake when Walter sat up and that moved him; there was a time when Walter could not so much as turn over in his sleep without his lover sitting up with an adrenaline overcharge. Walter loved to look at him, the long, classic lines of his back, the broad shoulders, the pale, plush mounds of his ass, and then his legs, acres of legs, sprawled apart, innocent yet inviting. Walter's eyes explored the dusky hints between the abandonment of those legs. He smiled at the pink mark that he had left on Alex's thigh, the clear outline of his teeth. It was irresistible. Walter had to kiss Alex's shoulder, earning a sleepy murmur. Following the trail of his lover's spine, Walter kissed his way down to the riches of his ass. There it was worth lingering, hands stroking the smooth skin, gently parting the cheeks, thumbs stroking inside lightly. Walter knew his lover was awake, had felt the alertness gather and heard the quickening of breath. He leaned close, smiling, and laved his tongue in the hollow of Alex's spine. Paused above his lover, Walter waited until Alex's husky voice said, "What'cha waiting for? Do it to me, Walter. Don't keep me waiting." "Waiting for you to invite me," Walter replied, reaching for the lube. He watched Alex raise one leg, opening himself, his face turned so he could watch Walter. Today's mood was not frantic. Walter took care, his every touch making this a ceremony, his every movement conveying tenderness, love, cherishing this beautiful, fierce, wounded man that he adored. When Alex was ready, Walter reached for a condom, but Alex took it from him, smoothing it carefully over Walter's erection. His touch was fire, but Walter held still, waited, and the moment passed. He needed to be inside. They needed to be so close that they were like one body. What it felt like to be inside Alex...his ass was all silken skin, plush flesh, the curve of it fitted to Walter's thighs. The inside of him gripped Walter's cock, fitted around him, yielded yet resisted in perfect proportions. He was fire, incandescent fire. Walter's face hard against Alex's back, his lover's scent, the sandalwood based scent he liked, mixed with Alex's natural musk, making him drunken. They moved together as if they were connected by more than flesh, the synapses of their brains, the ganglia of their nerves meshed. The sounds Alex made, his sighs, his greedy little grunts, the whisper of Walter's name, the growl of satisfaction coming. The pace of their joining speeding, their hearts beating faster, the sound of flesh against flesh, the feeling of lightening about to strike, on the brink of coming, no more thoughts, nothing but...bodies igniting. Desire completed. Falling apart yet reaching for each other even as they did. Alex turning, a weary kiss and then holding each other, realizing that as wonderful, as delightful as this was, there was more. There was love that held them to each other even if they could never make love again. It had been self-indulgent to fall asleep again, even if this was a quasi-vacation. The rapping at the door seemed annoyed. Alex's voice held wry amusement as he said, "Mulder's here." "How do you know?" Walter asked. "Because he knocked that way when we were partners," Alex said. "We would work until I fell asleep at my desk. He would wake me up, chide me as if I was a toddler past my bedtime, drive me home, and the next day, show up at some ungodly hour of the morning to wake me up to work again. Have I ever told you that Scully must have been a saint to put up with him?" "Scully knew how to say 'no'," Walter pointed out, enjoying the rosy blush that followed. "I'm getting in the shower. Put on your robe, get the door, and let Mulder inside. Then come and join me." "Why me?" Alex whined. "Because Mulder seems to freak out when I demonstrate that I have sexual needs like the next guy," Walter pointed out. "I think it's some kind of primal scene scenario with him." That made Alex laugh as he grabbed a robe and went to stop Mulder from causing their eviction. It hadn't taken Alex long to settle Mulder; Walter's lover climbed into the shower not long after the water hit the right temperature. "Mulder brought breakfast," Alex said. "Fruit, muffins, cheese, honey...yum. He said Emmett put it together for him. Makes me wonder if he spent the night with Easy E." "Easy E?" Walter asked then said, "No, don't explain." "Emmett's a sweetie," Alex said. "A real doll and a great cook." "Maybe we should marry him," Walter said. "Eh, just hire him to cook," Alex said. "Why bother with the rest when you have the best?" A sentiment with which Walter could agree. Alex knew this Mulder. Hell, he even liked this Mulder...this was the one that woke you up at three in the morning because he suddenly saw how all the pieces to a puzzle fit together and he had to tell someone, someone that understood. And Alex had nearly always understood even more than Scully had. This was the Mulder with shining eyes and a wry smile, his long fingers nervously brushing through his hair as he expounded some weird theory that turned out to be gospel truth. This was the Mulder who had smiled at him, reached out to brush his shoulder when Alex had supplied a small part of the pattern to a case. "I have an idea," Mulder said, bouncing on their bed, apparently not caring that the bedding looked as if water buffalo had been mating amidst them or that the sharp tang of sex and sweat pervaded the air despite the more than adequate circulation from the furnace fans. "You know how you said that Reichert's place looked as if some home handy man had decorated it? I mentioned that to Brian last night," Mulder said. "He told me that when he was visiting Stockwell's home that there was a roll of carpet outside in the driveway. Stockwell said that he had refurbished the recreation room over the garage himself. Real macho daddy kind of roll. Stockwell was pretty surprised when they came back out. Brian said that some scruffy appearing man in an old truck was driving off with the old carpet. Stockwell tried to cover it, but he was freaked. So you know what I'm thinking?" "Daddy played when the family was away? Something happened there?" Alex replied. "Yes, that's what I think," Mulder said. "He's smart enough to know that it's almost impossible to remove all DNA traces from flooring. He pulled the carpet, probably resurfaced underneath using some excuse or another, but to his surprise, a scavenger notices that the carpet isn't in bad shape and takes it. The rug could still be out there. We have to find the man who took it without alerting Stockwell. Brian described the guy as Asian or Hispanic, maybe fifty years old, sparse beard and mustache, dark slanted eyes, hair greasy, black, and below his ears. Brian said the guy was wearing something that looked like worn out khaki. He had a logo on the truck, DVV." "Disabled Vietnam Veterans," Walter said. "There are loosely organized branches all over America. The man probably has some sort of charity operation to benefit disabled vets and their families." "So we have a lead," Mulder said. "Something I can follow up," Walter said. "They'll talk to me before they talk to anyone your age, Mulder." "I can live with that," Mulder said. "Besides, Tekumi is going to take me to talk to street kids. See if we can find any other victims." "Alex, why don't you spend the day with Debbie?" Walter suggested. "To make up for us moving out?" "Sure," Alex said. "Good idea." Walter should have known that was too easy. Alex should have known better than to get involved with a case where he was, no use denying it, a victim. There were so many of them. Mulder knew in his head about teenage prostitutes, but the sheer numbers astounded him. They were as young as thirteen or fourteen; Tekumi said there were younger ones still, but most of them were rented out by pimps in private. Some of them were even sold by their parents as Mulder learned had happened to Michael and Ben's foster son, Hunter. Tekumi had a van filled with useful things. Shoes, socks, sandwiches, little kits of bleach even though he wasn't allowed to distribute clean 'works' that might prevent infection, cases of fresh fruit, a few boxes of candy. Each of these donations had the number and address of youth shelters that served gay and lesbian youth. Other than that card, Tekumi didn't preach. Mulder stood back or distributed sandwiches when a kid wanted to talk to Tekumi alone. He started the day impatient to find kids who might have information about Reichert or Stockwell; but by noon, Mulder had a lump in his throat, an ache in his heart, and a conviction that Tekumi was an angel in human form. After a half hour talk with a kid who looked as if he should be hanging out in a video parlor, Tekumi came back and said, "Bobby will meet us later. He's scared to talk on the street. Word is that Stockwell is finding ways to bust any kid who says anything about his dead partner. These kids are incredibly vulnerable. No one gives a damn about them." "I wouldn't say that," Mulder remarked. "They have you. I'd say that Brian's Justin gives a damn. Hell, if you loaded them all up and gave them to Debbie Novotny, she'd thank you for it." "I would, but she's not done taking care of the brats she already has," Tekumi said. "So where are we meeting Bobby?" Mulder asked. "At the hospital where I used to work," Tekumi said. "I promised him a meal at the cafeteria and then we can use the chapel to talk. It's usually empty during the day. I told him a couple hours. I have to finish this route." "The hospital? That's how you met Alex?" Mulder asked. Silence. "Tekumi, I know what happened to Alex, obviously," Mulder said. "They called me in to help since I'm still with the FBI and these days I have some pull." A flicker of a smile greeted his words. Tekumi said, "I suppose it's old habit, guarding privacy of victims." That bothered Mulder. Much as he had hated Alex, he would never have wanted that to happen to him. In retrospect, it made Mulder queasy to think about all the times he made some leering threat about jail house rape to a suspect. He vowed that he would ask Scully to wash his mouth out with soap if he ever so much as hinted at that ever again. Funny, being here, spending time with Alex and Walter brought back some feelings that Mulder had repressed. He had started to trust Alex. Started to enjoy the young agent following him around, bringing him coffee, listening to him, not without question, but with an open-minded attention he seldom had from Scully. Then the shit had hit the fan, Krycek was gone, taking with him a great deal of Mulder's sparse supply of trust in anyone but himself and Scully. Coming here, Mulder knew he was here for Walter, not Walter's lover. Here also, because cover-ups pissed him off. Now? Now, he was remembering the Alex he had liked. To be honest, despite the pain he had felt last night, seeing them together...he could see how much they loved each other. He wished to hell he trusted anyone as much as those two trusted each other. It didn't make him jealous though. He wanted to help them, give Alex back as much peace as he could find by putting the man who had raped him where he could do no further harm. Walter's research started with the yellow pages. He looked up and found the number and address for the vet center. It was in a shopping center for God's sake! That struck Walter as odd and wrong, but at least there would be parking for the SUV he had rented in a fit of macho humor. Inside, it felt more like home. Walter had been places like this before. From the bulletin boards in the lobby to the bored receptionist at the desk, it was like the color khaki, the color of a period of his life he would never forget, no matter how hard he tried. Walking through, Walter noticed the young ones first. Returned soldiers from the Middle East. He wondered how different it was for them...fewer protestors, but the same lack of honesty from the veteran's administration. He had followed the stories about the Gulf War Syndrome with outrage. He had always counted himself lucky that Agent Orange hadn't killed him. Walter suspected however that Agent Orange was the reason that he and Sharon had no children. "Can I help you?" the large man at the front desk asked. "Yeah, I'm looking for some who knows about a program called Disable Vietnam Veterans. DVV. They pick up used donations to sell for Vietnam era vets," Walter said. It was a guess, but he knew of similar programs in DC. He could be wrong. DVV might have been the name of some other type of company, but something rang a bell about that description. "They're not official," the receptionist said. "but they're not scam artists." "I'm looking for someone who picks up donations for them, a dark skinned man with black hair, greasy black hair. He might be Asian or Hispanic. He has slanted eyes," Walter said. An older man had come out of his office and was listening. He said, "Sound like Bill Alexander. He drives a truck with a DVV logo. You know Bill, Dave. The Alaskan Indian who brings the flags to ceremonies." "Oh, yeah, the big success story," the receptionist said. "Seems to be doing well these days." "What's the problem?" the newcomer asked. "My name is Walter Skinner. I'm...I used to be a FBI agent, but now I'm working on something personal. A friend of mine was assaulted here some years back. Recently we found out that he was one of many victims. Bill might have accidentally picked up something that could be evidence." "All right," the man said. "Leave your number. I can talk to Bill. Try to set up a meeting. My name is Ed Parsons. I'm one of the counselors here." Parsons smiled at Walter and asked, "How long were you over there?" "One tour of duty when I was eighteen," Walter answered and then realized that he had not mentioned being a veteran. "What made you ask?" "I know ghosts when I see them," Parson said. "I have them myself. Ever need to talk, here's my card. Vietnam era group meets every Tuesday night. You would be welcome." "Thanks," Walter said, accepting the card. His ghosts were mostly at rest now, but he understood that not everyone was as lucky as he was. Not everyone had friends, a lover. A beautiful lover as sexy and devoted as Alex. None of the other kids were talking. Between Stockwell's campaign that had driven them off the streets a few months back, the slayings that were finally being talked about, and the current harassment by the police force, these kids weren't looking for any more trouble. Mulder shook his head as Tekumi climbed back into the van after distributing the remaining food. "Aren't you just enabling them to stay out here?" Mulder asked. "These kids should be home or in some kind of shelter, at least." "For most of these kids, family is not an option," Tekumi said, his Egyptian-like eyes dark as they turned their beauty on Mulder. "Their families are often the reason they are here. Seventy percent or more of these children are victims of sexual abuse. Most of them have been in the foster care system at one time or another. There aren't throngs of people coming forward to offer a home to kids like this. I feed them, I offer them a reminder that help is out there if they can trust anyone. Once in a while, one takes my hand. You want them locked up? Some of them had their first sexual experience inside and it wasn't because they were ready or wanted it either. Wise up, Mulder. You just don't want to have to see this. No one wants to see this. They wish your aliens would just abduct these children so no one has to deal with them. The only one who would truly mourn is their johns." "Don't sugar-coat it for me, Tekumi," Mulder drawled. The social worker blushed and said, "Sorry, I'll get down off my soap box now." "I didn't know," Mulder said. "I want to help." "Getting rid of Stockwell will help," Tekumi said. He ran his hand through his fluff of kinky hair and glanced at his watch. "It's time to have that talk with Bobby." Mulder would have never guessed that Bobby was a baby pro. In this setting, he looked like any other young teen, his scuffed tennis shoe swinging as he drank a Coke, his faded jeans not much different from the scattering of other kids in the cafeteria. His blue eyes looked at the families with a hungry look. Red hair and freckles, not too different than William would look in a few years. The kid loaded a tray with enough food to feed a busload of kids. Mulder paid for it without a question and watched wrapped cookies and a container of juice find a home in Bobby's battered jacket. After Bobby had stuffed an amazing amount of food into his thin body, he let out a loud burp, earning him frowning looks from a harried motherly type at the next table. Mulder felt like adding a belch of his own to the atmosphere, but instead frowned back at the woman. The chapel was as Tekumi predicted deserted. He said, "You find people here in the morning and night. Somehow the bright light of midday gives you comfort of its own." "Church sucks," Bobby announced. "Don't look at me," Mulder said. "I'm Jewish. Kind of." "Oh," Bobby said. "So is it okay for you to be in here?" "It's non-denominational, I think," Mulder said. "Bobby, you had something to tell us?" "Yeah, about Stockwell and Reichert." Bobby said. "Reichert was around a lot. Guys knew he was a cop, but they were all afraid of him. No one wanted to be with him. We heard things happened to a few kids. Anyway, he picked me up one night. It was a slow night and I needed...I needed money bad and he promised me a lot. Next thing I knew I had a sack on my head and I was all tied up. I was really scared. Then I heard this other voice that I didn't know. He was asking how old I was...I was fourteen then and I'm sixteen now. Anyway, the new guy said, 'What the hell are you thinking? This is sick. The kid is no older than my son. Let him go.' The guy left. Reichert ending up not doing anything to me. He gave me money and said not to talk about anything. I was just glad to have the cash and be out of there and didn't think anymore about it until I heard that voice again on the TV. It was Police Chief Stockwell. He was running for mayor." "Are you sure?" Tekumi asked. "Yeah, I'm real good at voices," Bobby said. "But you didn't see the man?" Mulder asked, feeling disappointed. "No, just heard his voice," Bobby said. "I guess I'm lucky that I look young for my age. I could be dead now if I'm guessing right. I heard all about Reichert. Stockwell probably saved me, but I don't owe him anything. Right?" "Dead right," Tekumi said. "Bobby, I think you need to get out of town. I have a foster home in Philadelphia. Would you go there?" "Are they creeps? You check them out? Cuz I'm not giving it away for free to some jerk who scammed the social workers," Bobby said. "I know this couple personally. They work with teenagers and they will treat you with respect if you earn it," Tekumi said. "Okay, but just because I got a feeling that this town isn't safe for me," Bobby said. "If Stockwell remembers me, he might wonder if I saw him. That wouldn't be good." "I'm going to drive you to my friends personally," Tekumi said. "Mulder, can you get Bobby put in protective custody? That way I won't have to go through the system here. Stockwell has a lot of friends on the bench. I don't want them to get word about Bobby." "Yeah, hit the road with Bobby and I'll get paperwork to follow," Mulder said. Whatever they said about power corrupting, Mulder found it damn useful now that he had it. After his foray to the vet's center, Walter visited two other veteran's programs, finding that Bill was known to both of them, but that he dropped in when he felt like it, on no set schedule. He left messages in both placed and then decided to check on Alex. He assumed that Alex had done as he suggested and spent the day with Debbie. "I haven't seen him all day," Debbie said unhappily. "Vic dropped in, hoping to see him, but there wasn't an answer at the hotel when I called." "Maybe he went to Babylon or dropped in on Brian," Walter said. "Brian's maybe, but it's still too early for Babylon," Debbie said. "Christ, he shouldn't be wandering around on his own. What if Stockwell finds out that he's back in town?" "That wouldn't be good," Walter said. "But, believe me, Alex can take care of himself. He's a different man than the one you knew." "Sure, but I'm still worried," Debbie said, wiping her hands dry on the dish towel. "Have him call my cell if he..."Walter started to say, but the cell rang. "Alex?" he asked. "No, this is Bill Alexander. You've been asking around about me. Why?" a gruff voice demanded. "It's very complicated," Walter said. "Can I meet you to talk about it?" "Depends on who you are," Alexander said. "I'm a former FBI agent," Walter said. "I'm trying to help a friend who was assaulted here a few years back." "A fed?" Alexander said with a sneer in his voice. "I don't talk to feds. Fuck off, Mr. Skinner. Leave me the hell alone." Great, Walter thought as the phone hung up. 'I have no idea where Alex is. My source won't talk to me and my cell phone is going dead.' While Mulder was on the phone with his new boss, arranging for Bobby Lawrence's protective custody, he decided to pull in a few more favors. He wanted to get a warrant to have a forensic team tear Kenneth Reichert's garage apartment to pieces. Reichert had died before he could be charged, but that didn't mean an investigation couldn't be ordered. Mulder made it clear that he suspected a cover-up and that Reichert was not alone in his crimes. Ah, it was sweet. He was going to get what he wanted. Stockwell had his small conspiracy here. Now he was going to find out that his power wouldn't keep his sins hidden. Not if Mulder could do anything about it. Both orders would be faxed to local FBI headquarters by the end of the working day tomorrow. It wasn't as fast as Mulder would have liked it to be, but it would have to do. Mulder's mind roved around and he couldn't think of anything more he could do until the orders arrived. Not legally anyway. He would have liked to have confronted Stockwell, made the man sweat, but even Mulder knew that wasn't a good idea. Stockwell was a piece of slime, but that didn't mean he wasn't smart. So far, they had kept the investigation quiet. Stockwell wouldn't know that what he thought was a cold trail was getting very, very hot again. Mulder smiled to himself. They were going to nail this asshole. For the kids and for...Alex. Walter awoke that Saturday morning, six days after they'd arrived in Pittsburgh, and found the bed, and room, empty. Immediately, he picked up his cell phone and called Alex's. He got the voicemail, so he left a message asking Alex to call him as soon as possible. After calling Brian and Michael, both men not having seen him, he tried Debbie's house, and got her answering machine. Debbie didn't own a cell phone, so Walter then tried the diner. Saturday was her day off. Exhausting all possibilities, Walter resigned to the fact that he had the morning to himself. He told himself that Alex was well able to take care of himself, but that didn't really stop the slow rise of panic. "Jesse? Do you remember me?" Alex asked, inching into the room. The kid was curled up on his bed in the fetal position, still wearing faded jeans, but he wore a green t-shirt, similar in color to the shirt Alex had worn to see him a few days earlier. The boy also had a pair of Air Jordans sitting on the floor, the kind they make that have zippers on the front instead of laces. Alex silently blessed Tekumi for his exquisite attention to detail. Jesse looked up, but then looked away at the far wall of his room, not acknowledging that he'd even seen Alex. Taking a deep breath, Alex tried again. "Jesse, I brought someone to meet you. Tekumi told you that we think the men who hurt you had done the same thing to me years ago. Well, I want you to meet the woman who helped me. Maybe she can help you." Alex fought hard not to let the tears fall and upset Jesse. He walked to the door and opened it to lead Debbie into the room. She was dressed in full regalia: pink and lavender sweater, faded jeans and sparkly sneakers. She wore lots of costume jewelry and a big pink scarf around her hair. She handed Alex a white baker's box and pulled her rainbow mittens from her hands. "Hi, handsome. I'm Debbie Novotny. I'm the resident mother hen to all the young men who need one." Jesse didn't look at her but sat up from his position and wrapped his arms around his knees, hugging them close to his chest. Debbie, being her usual pushy self, took that as an invitation and sat on the bed. Alex handed her back the box. "I brought you the specialty from the diner where I waitress. These are our lemon bars. They're really good. You can keep them for yourself or share them with your...friends. Just for you." She placed them on the bed beside Jesse who didn't even look at them. Debbie took a deep breath and looked up at Alex. He silently pleaded with his eyes to keep trying. Alex knew deep in his heart that if someone didn't start giving more of a shit about this kid than the fucked up notion of care they were providing at the state hospital, Jesse was going to succeed in killing himself one day. Debbie reached out and touched one of Jesse's long, thin hands where it gripped his opposite wrist. Jesse jumped a bit, like a high-strung animal. "Oh, sweetie, don't you be afraid of me. I'm the last person who would hurt you. No, when my angel, Lexi over there, when he needed a mama to take care of him, after those bastards left him for dead, I took care of him. I can do the same for you, I promise. Let me take care of you, sweetie." Her warm hand caressed his arm, and surprising to Alex, he let her stroke him, like a scared dog. "Look, sweetie, I'm not gonna push you, but I just want you to know, that I care about you. You don't have to be alone in your head. You can just reach out and trust someone. You can always trust me. I'll love you like you were my own. I promise." They waited a few more minutes, but Alex was concerned they were antagonizing Jesse. He began rocking in place, the way some children do to calm themselves. Debbie turned back to Alex and began to shake her head, thinking that it hadn't worked. As she started to rise, a strong hand grabbed her wrist. She turned quickly toward Jesse to see him holding onto her tightly. The face she showed Alex was questioning and touched with fear. Alex moved forward, to possibly thwart a physical attack. He would be prepared for Jesse's attack. He wasn't prepared when the boy started to cry and wail, like a young child. Debbie covered her quivering mouth with her hand and tried to touch Jesse with the other. The boy just gripped her around her waist and buried his face under her bosom, hiding in the thick folds of mother. Quickly, she took the boy's thin body into her arms and began soothing and crooning to him, rocking back and forth, telling him he was safe. "Mamaaaaaa!" he cried out, as Debbie fought back her tears, trying to be strong for the boy someone threw away. Quickly, Alex left the room, alerting the orderly to watch to make sure Debbie was safe, even though he knew she would be. He made his way quickly to the visitors' men's room and locked himself inside. God bless single occupant bathrooms. He lowered the lid on the toilet and sat down, burying his face in his hands to cry. After he recomposed himself, Alex washed his face and went back to the room. Tekumi had shown up and was happily sharing lemon bars with Debbie and Jesse. The boy was on the floor in the corner, having stopped crying. Tekumi was sitting in a chair he'd brought in. "Alex, hi, how are you doing?" the beautiful man asked. "I'm OK now. Is he OK?" "He spoke. Two words, 'brick house'. Then he took a lemon bar and sat on the floor. I'm shocked." "All it takes is a mother's love. All my boys know what it's like to be loved, Jesse won't be any different, right, sweetie!" She looked over at him, wearing the same look of devotion she gave to himself, to Brian, to Justin and even to Michael. Jesse had been adopted. Walter Skinner decided he would not waste the day waiting around for Alex to return. If Bill Alexander wouldn't go to him, he would go to Bill Alexander. He stopped at a Circuit City store and quickly purchased a GPS. He wouldn't be able to manage a map in the truck by himself, but the rented Expedition had a spot where one could mount the electronic tracking device. He could drive around the streets of Pittsburgh alone and not get lost. It was slow going at first, since late morning commuters were still littering the streets. After ten that morning, things began to get quiet. He cruised the outer limits if the urban area moving further into the borders of suburbia and caught a glimpse of the truck. Adrenaline pumped up and he fought hard not to pull beside Alexander and force him to pull over. Walter knew he didn't have a badge anymore. He couldn't just act crazy. The man was already angry. Antagonizing him wouldn't do any good. He drove casually, trying to stay a good distance from the truck, Skinner followed Alexander through the city until traffic began picking up around lunchtime. He had to pay close attention, but keeping Bill Alexander's truck in site was his main focus after driving safely. He was only conscious of the GSP inasmuch as he wanted to know his location. Other than that, he ignored it. Once or twice, he knew he'd gotten too close, and saw the bearded, grizzled face of Bill Alexander staring straight at him in the rearview mirror. The man was cautious, but when they wended their way into a less-populated neighborhood, Walter almost thought the man was going to try and lose him. It was the exact opposite. The barrel-shaped man, no taller than Scully, with graying long hair that was held back in a ponytail under his Pirates baseball cap, emerged from his truck and started toward Walter's truck. Walter, taking a deep breath, got out and started toward Alexander. "You sonofabitch! I told you on the fucking phone to leave me alone!" Alexander shouted before taking a swing at Walter. Thinking quickly and carefully, Walter blocked his punch and jumped backward. He needed to diffuse the man before going any further. "Mr. Alexander, I'm not trying to bring you any harm. I need to talk to you." "Too fucking bad!" he yelled back at Walter and took another swing, connecting with Walter's belly. With the wind knocked out of him, the little man grabbed Walter by the jacket collar and threw him against the truck hood. "Leave me alone!" "Please, I need your help. My lover was..." "What? What you need my help for?" he yelled, with another punch to Walter's stomach. "He was...raped...like the other boys...years ago..." As Walter tried to catch his breath, Alexander stepped back and looked down at him. "What?" Alexander stepped back, but didn't back down. "My lover was one of the boys who were raped by those men. By the grace of God, he wasn't murdered, left bleeding in the freezing cold in a dumpster to die. You may have picked up a piece of evidence to put one of the murderers away. Please, help me." Alexander stood there for a moment, not moving as Skinner rose from the hood of his truck and straightened his jacket. "What do you mean I have a piece of evidence?" "I mean, you removed a carpet from in front of a large brick home that may have trace DNA evidence on it. I need that carpet, to test it. Please, I need your help. The help of one ex-marine to another." Alexander looked Walter up and down, sniffed twice, then said, "What did the carpet look like?" Alex sipped his sparkling water, waiting for his lunch guest to arrive. Ted had taken Alex to Nakama Steakhouse years ago, hoping to have one last chance to seduce Alex. He didn't succeed, but they sealed a friendship so deep, it lasted through the years Alex was gone from Pittsburgh. Alex realized that if he had come back sooner, he might have been there for Ted when Ted needed him. The other man arrived and smiled at Alex, taking his seat gracefully. "Hello, Alex. It's wonderful to see you again." "Hi, Teddy. I missed you this last year. I'm so sorry..." Ted held his hand up, stopping Alex mid-word. "You have nothing to be sorry about. All the mistakes I made, I made freely on my own. One of the twelve steps, you know." Alex nodded, remembering back to a time when his left arm was a reminder of his time in Hong Kong, not the lack of it his time in Russia. "Ted, I've been where you are, sort of. When I left here, I went to Hong Kong, remember?" "How could I forget? I was so frightened...we risked our lives to get you out of the country." Ted took a sip of his water and cleared his throat. "For that, I'm sorry. While I was there, I...picked up a little habit. Heroin. And I was shooting up...every night. Sometimes in the early afternoon, as well. I wore the track marks on my arms..." Ted reached out and held Alex's hand. The two men looked at each other, both seeing each other's pain and kinship in their needs to escape into their own worlds. "Have you ever fallen off the wagon, Alex?" The look in Ted's soft brown eyes conveyed comfort to Alex. "Uh, no, I didn't. The...addiction was corrected. You *do* know about what Walter and I did, the aliens and Agents Mulder, Scully, Doggett and Reyes, right? You were vaccinated, yes?" Ted pulled the neck of his loose sweater down to show the telltale circular scar on his left shoulder. "Hurt like a bastard," Ted said, picking up his menu. Both men ordered drinks and steaks, salads and Ted's favorite green tea ice cream for dessert. They waited for their "virgin coladas" to arrive. Even though Alex wasn't in any danger, he respected his friend's sobriety. "The vaccine you were given is an antibody extracted from my bloodstream. I carried the oil alien in my body from Hong Kong to its ship. Her ship, really. She rewarded me for allowing her to use my body as a transport by healing my addiction. I was left with antibodies to defeat the alien threat. I'm...sorry that with all I have done in my life and in my travels, I wasn't there for you." "Well, saving the planet from enslavement by aliens can keep a person busy." Alex reached across the table and touched Ted's hand. "Ted, you and I have always been friends. I have always felt differently about you. I should have gone with you the night that I was...hurt. Of all the men in my life, other than Walter, you're the only other man I trust completely." Ted sat back, shocked look on his face. "I...don't...I mean...well, what about Brian? I mean you two together..." "Brian and I fucked. Both Walter and Justin seem to think that since he's got a magnetic personality that Brian and I will be together again. This isn't true. Sure he was fun when I needed something like that in my life, but that's over. Walter is my future as he was my past." "So, you truly are committed to that Walter after all," Ted said. "I always was. Now, enough about me. Tell me about why you felt like you needed to make yourself almost die taking that...shit," Alex said. Alexander's face blanked out, all expression vanishing. He stepped back, hitched up his sagging pants and pulled his heavy jacket closed. "You drink coffee? Got some money?" "What?" Walter asked. "Coffee, buy me some coffee," Alexander said, "Over there." Over there was a hole in the wall cafe. Walter accepted Alexander's plan and walked into the dark little place. Alexander slouched into a booth. "Pie's good here too." "What kind?" Walter asked. "The cherry is best," Alexander said. "Waitress, two coffees and two slices of cherry pie," Walter ordered. "I don't like people following me," Alexander said. "Trying to make me do stuff I don't want to do." "I was told you are a man who cares about kids," Walter said. "Yeah, I like kids," Alexander said. "I look after them." "The man who hurt my lover has killed more than one boy and he's badly hurt several more," Walter stated. "Yeah?" Alexander said. "Carpet I took. I know that house. It's that asshole Stockwell. Indian Center got after him for racial issues...like his guys beating the shit out of any skins they arrested. Next thing we knew the center was rezoned. Never did get another place. You telling me this guy is a mo?" "A mo?" Walter asked, then realized that the it was a shortened version of child molester. "Yeah, this guy rapes kids, teenager, young men." "So what does that mean? You were fucking with a teenager? That's how your lover got messed with?" Alexander asked. "No," Walter said, more forcefully than he should have in a public place. In a quieter tone of voice, he said, "My lover looks younger, but he was in mid twenties when it happened. They might have thought he was younger or it could have been because he is very beautiful." "Okay," Alexander said. "I have kind of a nephew who was that way. He had a drug problem, ended up on the streets." Alexander looked sad for a long moment. "At least, he didn't die like that. Yeah, I got the carpet. I cut it down to fit my living room. It's a small room. There was a piece that looked like it had a bad stain and someone tried to clean it. Just made a bigger mess. I put that out in my dog house. The dog likes to sleep outside some nights. He's like me. He's seen hard times." "Mr. Alexander, I need that carpet and I may need for you to testify where you found the rug," Walter said. "Cops? Courts? I don't do neither," Alexander said. "Then boys like your nephew will keep on dying," Walter said. "What would he think of that?" "He's dead," Alexander said. "AIDS got him." Alexander's scarred fingers stroked the sparse wisps of hair that sprouted on his dark skin. He shook his head. "Going up against the Chief of Police is a dumb move. Maybe I don't have all the papers I need for my program to help the veterans and their families." "I see," Walter said. "Funny, someone said you were a hero, a man who threw away medals he won until he decided to kick the society who disrespected him in the teeth." "Skinner, if you were in 'Nam, you know that there aren't any heroes. There are just guys who have different instincts. Still I got balls. If I didn't, I'd still be looking for my soul in a bottle," Alexander said. "Help these kids," Walter said. "Help them because you can, because you are here in this moment and you can make a difference." "Talk like the preacher man who blessed our heads and shivered in his bed back a base camp," Alexander said. He let his thin lips twist into a smile and said, "Okay, I'm in for it. Do we go get the rug now?" "May as well," Walter said, a deep sigh releasing the tension in his chest. "I was tired of being myself," Ted said. "Tired of being a disappointment to my friends. I wanted to be someone else. On crystal, I could have everything. I felt powerful. Can you understand that?" "Yeah," Alex said. He hadn't felt that way in Hong Kong. The only thing the stuff he took there had done was let him stay awake longer, endure the pain of his existence. Maybe the way he felt when he had a gun in his hand was close to what Ted felt. Sometimes when he was in the game, all of his senses engaged, he didn't care who he worked for. All that mattered was taking his life to the edge and looking down. Every time he survived, he had felt incredible. The problem was that he found himself dancing closer and closer to the precipice. There was only so many times that you can fuck with death before he takes you and keeps you. "You have a car?" Alex asked. "Yes," Ted said. "I'm working for Brian, doing well. It's not in Brian's league, but it's a nice little Honda Civic." "Fine," Alex replied. He turned his most intense gaze on Ted and said, "How about an adventure?" "Wh-what?" Ted asked, stammering. He twisted his napkin in his hands. "What kind of adventure?" "I want to see what Stockwell is doing," Alex said. "I'm tired of everyone investigating this case but me." "Should you do that?" Ted asked. "Isn't it dangerous?" "I'm a big boy," Alex replied, "How about you?" After a long pause, Ted said, "I'm in." "Good, Alex and Ted's big adventure," Alex said. It took him a moment to see that Ted did not get the reference. He would have to remedy that in the near future. Alex's hand rested on Ted's knee as his friend drove. It was not a seduction; he had no intention of being faithless to Walter. He needed the connection and the comfort. It was hard to admit that, but it was the truth. Coming back here was a mistake. You would think that with all the horrors that he had experienced after Stockwell and Reichert raped him that the purely human evil of the rape would lessen. Not so, Alex found the memory as raw and aching as if it had happened yesterday. Stockwell was throwing snowballs with his boys when Alex and Ted pulled up across the street. An overgrown hedge kept them obscured while giving them a clear view of the house across the street. Alex wasn't sure what he expected to see. For the record, Stockwell's kids didn't seem afraid of him and his manner with them was untainted of the man that Alex knew existed beneath the veneer of family man. Maybe Stockwell saw the world as some cops did, them and us. If you weren't people Stockwell clearly recognized as good citizens, then you were prey. "So deep in the closet, he can't even admit what he wants to himself," Ted said. "Justin thinks that Reichert and Stockwell really wanted to fuck each other, but they were too macho to admit it. So instead they picked up young men and boys, not too young when Stockwell was involved, but when Reichert was on his own, he wasn't as picky. He went after kids like Hunter." "I don't fit the victim profile," Alex said. "I wondered about that." "You looked younger than your age, Alex," Ted said. "You looked like a college kid. That's what I thought you were when you walked in. Uh, until you walked out with Reichert. Then I suspected that you might be...hooking. I wished I had made an offer. I don't normally do that kind of thing, but you were something else. Still are." "Yeah, I was desperate. I thought my life couldn't have been worse," Alex said. Stockwell scored a hit against his youngest son. The boy laughed and darted across the street, skidding until he thudded into Ted's car. "Sorry, mister!" The boy cried out. A moment later, Stockwell ran across. He tapped on Ted's window then saw Alex's face. His face turned red then purple before he grabbed his kid and almost pushed him back across the street. Ted pulled out and away before Stockwell came back, but Alex saw the police chief writing something down. Ted's license numbers, no doubt. "Sorry, Ted," Alex said. "Don't be. I have my own problems with Stockwell. I forgot to tell you about my rise and fall as a porn mogul," Ted said. "Thanks to Stockwell, I went from rags to riches nearly to jail." "Tell me about it," Alex said. "You might remember I was fond of my porn, used to surf a little at work," Ted said. "Yeah, Brian used to rag you about it," Alex said. "Nothing wrong with liking porn." "That's what I thought, but the boss caught me. I guess he thought I was wanking at work," Ted said. "Really I had just spilled something in my lap, but I did have some pretty boys on the monitor. He fired me." "Bastard," Alex said. "So there I was unemployed and rumor washing out most of the jobs I was trained to do," Ted said. "Then I had this idea. Do what I loved. So I started my own porn site. It was doing okay, but Emmett was the one that made it big for me. He was my star. Always my star." Having heard bits and pieces of what happened, Alex patted Ted's arm and said, "He loves you." "Yeah, I hope so. I'm still trying to make him believe how sorry I am," Ted said. "If my Walter could forgive me, your Emmett will forgive you," Alex said. He said, "Are you in any trouble right now? I have a feeling Stockwell isn't going to play nice." "No, I'm back to being a gainfully employed good citizen," Ted replied. "I was lucky enough not to get caught with the crystal." "Let me know if there are any problems," Alex said. "I have enough money to afford a good attorney if he harasses you." "I will," Ted said. "Where to now? Your hotel?" "No, I should spend some time with Mom," Alex said. "Take me there." With Tekumi on his mission to get Bobby to the foster home, Mulder found himself at loose ends and thinking about Debbie's kitchen. He loved being there; could see why Alex had remained attached all those years to the big, loud woman with the brassy hair. She was as far from Mulder's mother as two members of the same species could be, but he liked her a lot. She did things Mulder had secretly wished his mother would have done, from baking pies to ruffling his hair. Mulder arrived to find Alex's surrogate mom outside swinging a broom at the thieving crow. It cawed at her, just out of her reach and then flew off to a tall tree that overlooked a neighboring garage. "He has my earring again!" Debbie said. "Don't worry," Mulder said. "I'll get it." Handing Debbie his jacket, Mulder crossed to the garage. Just as the started his way up the tree, Alex showed up. Mulder called out, "Hey, you, Walter was worried about you." "I tried to call him, but his cell phone wasn't working," Alex said. "What the hell are you doing?" "The crow took one of your mom's earrings again," Mulder explained. "I think he has a nest up there in the pine." "You'll probably break your neck," Alex said. He joined Mulder under the tree. "Give me a hand and I can grab that big branch," Mulder said. "All right," Alex agreed. Mulder really had a thing about trees. Must have a little monkey in his genome. It wouldn't surprise Alex. From what he understood, there was a little of everything in the hodgepodge of genes that made up this human remain of the project. Mulder grabbed another branch and inched his way further up. Debbie joined Alex below the tree and called up, "It isn't even an expensive earring. Come down, Mulder!" Hugging his mom, Alex said, "He won't listen. He'll be okay. Mulder takes a thousand chances a day. It's just who he is." Teetering precariously, Mulder said, "I can almost reach it. It has a mess up here. I can see someone's keys, bunch of paper, here's your earring, a bunch of earrings. Uh, Alex? Damn, Alex, I think I have the badge." Mulder's voice crackled with excitement. Alex felt a jolt of nausea. His legs went weak and he leaned on Debbie for a moment as Mulder came scrambling down the tree. Grinning, Mulder handed Debbie her earring and then held the badge out toward Alex. It was tarnished from long exposure to the elements, but Alex could still see a few threads clinging to the pin. There was a darker spot, the remains of his blood after all these years. Flinching away, Alex took a step back, swayed, and might have fallen except Mom and Mulder both grabbed for him. "Take a deep breath," Mulder advised, his hand somehow comforting as it sat squarely on his back. Humiliating as this was, Mulder was right. Alex slumped down, drew a steady deep breath, ignored the bitter fluid in his mouth, and fought the nausea and dizziness away. "I'm okay," he announced as much to himself as to Debbie and Mulder. Despite his assertion, Mulder and Debbie kept hands on him as they walked inside. Moments later, Alex found himself with hot tea in front of him. When he tasted it, he could detect the bite of vodka. Debbie said, "Sometimes you need more than tea in your cup." Nodding, Alex held his hand out for the badge. It was already encased in a plastic evidence bag although Alex doubted that any fingerprints remained after all this time. With new methodology, Alex's DNA could be detected on the badge although with no chain of evidence; that was no real proof that Stockwell was involved. "He knew it was missing," Alex said. "A cop knows when his badge is gone. I think he suspected I had it. He shot at me afterwards. Barely missed me. If I hadn't been bending down to get my key, that would have been the end of the story." "Might have been the end of a lot of stories," Mulder remarked, as near as he could come to acknowledging the role Alex had played in the war against the aliens and their human collaborators. "Yeah," Alex said. He drank the rest of the vodka laced tea. "I'll call it in and confirm that it was Stockwell's badge number back then," Mulder said. "Alex, you better come with me. I think you had better keep close to Walter or myself. Stockwell may still think that killing you will end his problems." "Since when did I need anyone's protection, much less your help?" Alex asked. "Since you asked for my help," Mulder said. "Don't make me put you in protective custody." Withholding a nasty comment, Alex settled for sulking. Where the hell was Walter anyway? Bill's dog had blue eyes, a thick coat of silver and black fur, and a bad attitude. Bill had to lock it in his bedroom to allow Walter in the house. Bill pointed to the neatly laid carpet and said, "This is it." It was Berber in a medium blue shade and the part of it that covered Bill's living room was barely worn. Going outside, Bill pulled out the piece he used for the dog house. At first, it was too covered in dog fur for Walter to see the stain, but after it was shaken several times, the discolored stain was plain to see. Alexander asked, "Does the good part have to go too?" "Yes, but I'll pay to have it replaced," Walter said. "You're going to have to testify about where you picked up the carpet." "Sure, nice big brick house," Bill said. "I picked up a big donation from the people next door and then I saw the carpet. It was too nice to go to the dump. I made out a receipt for the donation and all. I keep them all. Got this lawyer friend who helps me out. He said it's important to keep records." "Good job," Walter said. "I'll take the scrap now and we can send some people to pick up the larger rug. It will have to be tested too. There may be smaller traces of evidence on it. There are only a few things that will completely destroy DNA evidence. It's harder than people think. Blood can seep down into the wood or to the substrate of a room. Once we get a warrant, we'll test in the man's house too." "Stockwell's house," Bill said. "Creep. Never thought he was that kind of man. I thought he was a bully cop, but a rapist?" Bagging the scrap of rug in a garbage sack, Walter dusted off his hands. Bill said, "Wait up a minute. Pull up a chair. I owe you a cup of coffee." Nodding, Walter sat down in the small kitchen, watching Alexander produce a pot of coffee from his old Mr. Coffee. The man winced and said, "Got a leg full of shrapnel. Hurts like hell during the winter. Hurts some in the summer, too." "Took me in the gut," Walter found himself saying. "I woke up in a body bag. Lucky on of the medics noticed me take a breath." "No shitting?" Bill said. "Think I might have died of the fright if that happened to me." "Nearly did," Walter said. He accepted the cup of coffee he was handed. "Fried bread," Bill said. "It's good with jam. Have some." The golden colored bread was good, rich. Like a doughnut that was unsweetened. Walter slathered on the jam from the jar with the hand printed label. He wasn't sure what kind of berries made the jam, but it was sweetly tart and good. He shrugged and took the real butter, too. He would make it up later...eat broiled fish a couple of days. By the time, Walter remembered to glance at his watch, another hour had passed. Bill and he had journeyed from the Ho Chi Minh to the more pleasant topic of fishing in Alaska, something that Walter had managed to do once in his lifetime and would do again if he could persuade Alex to go with him. "I better go check on Alex," Walter said. "Yeah, better. Hope he's doing okay with this," Alexander said. "I know all about PTSD. Learned about it at the treatment center. Tell him no matter how tough he thinks he is, it's better to get help." "I will. Thanks, Bill," Walter said. Taking the piece of stained rug, Walter hid it behind the seat. Hopefully, Stockwell wasn't worried about what happened to the carpet. He probably assumed that the dump had picked it up or at least, that it was unlikely. Arriving back at his hotel, Walter found a Mulder he knew very well: hyper, high on the pursuit of some truth, and a bit full of himself. Unfortunately, he knew this Alex, too. His lover had a closed down expression, eyes narrowed to hide their beauty, mouth pulled tight, and brows furrowed. He looked like a thug about to be booked. "Where you been?" Alex said. "Called you three times." "I found Bill Alexander, the guy with the rug from Stockwell's recreation room," Walter said. "And we found Stockwell's badge," Mulder said. "I just confirmed that the number matches Stockwell's old badge number. I'm having it flown to DC for analysis." "Good, let's send the carpet too," Walter said. "Stockwell still has a lot of friends." "I just heard that he has been indicted for his cover-up of Reichert's crimes," Alex said. "Ted mentioned it. He'll find his friends are fewer by the day." "Wait until the rest comes out," Mulder said. "You going to tell Walter what you did or am I?" "Hey, I didn't mean to even tell you," Alex replied. "What, Alex?" Walter said. "Out with it." "I was having lunch with Ted," Alex said. "We were talking and I decided it would be a good idea to see what Stockwell was doing. His kid skidded across the road and into Ted's car. Stockwell saw me." "Shit," Walter said. "Fuck. Alex..." "I had to know if I could face him," Alex replied. "I can't be helpless, Walter. I can't hide behind you and Mom and Mulder." "There's no one who would question your courage," Mulder said. Both Walter and Alex stopped to stare at that utterance. Was that really Mulder? Walter's former agent and Alex's former partner grinned. He shrugged and said, "I'm full of surprises." "Listen," Mulder said. "I think I should get a room here, too. I also want to call in some favors. Get someone down here to help watch the situation. From what I've learned, Stockwell is well respected as a cop. The boys in blue don't believe he's guilty. They're blaming the faggots for him losing the campaign and they see his loyalty to his partner as commendable. Pittsburg has a small reputation for out of control police. Whatever protection Alex has, it had better be from the outside." "I'll think about it," Walter said. "I could call in some favors, too. Can you afford this place, Mulder?" "Yeah, I'm using the money my father left me," Mulder said. "I've stopped punishing myself for my father's sins." "That's good, Mulder," Walter said. "I'd offer you a couch, but..." "I wouldn't get much sleep," Mulder replied. "I get the picture." "As for you, Alex," Walter said. "You can work with us, but you stay where I can keep an eye on your ass. That's MY ass and I want it safe and sound." That comment earned a flicker of a smile, but Alex still looked as if he meant trouble. Mulder sat at the desk in his room, a very well-appointed room, typing on his laptop, making more notes for his report. He didn't want to miss a thing. Sometimes, in his zeal to get to the exciting climax of his cases, he missed many minor details. One thing he wanted to mention was the location of the found badge, and its pristine condition. He wanted it clear that the badge had been hidden from human hands for a decade and was not moved by anything other than the crow. Hell, for Mulder, a terrestrial explanation was more difficult to prove. How he wished for just one instance of a rebel shape-shifter alien to rear its head. Beside him, the phone chirped gently to life and he flipped open his latest cellular purchase and brought it to his ear. "Mulder." "Mulder, it's me. I got the results back from the badge. Krycek's DNA is on it, blood and semen." "I knew it. Alex wouldn't lie." Mulder sneered into the empty room. "Alex? Is there something you aren't telling me, Mulder?" "Scully, don't be fresh." He shook his head at her, knowing she could probably picture what he looked like. "There's another sample on here, too. I accessed the database for known sex offenders, and I came up with the name Kenneth Reichert. Does that mean anything to you?" "Oh shit. He was suspected of killing Jason Kemp, and several other young men in this area fingered him as their rapist. Alex identified him, as well." Mulder deflated a little, thinking about the situation at hand. "I'm sorry, Mulder. I just...I'm still having..." "After all this time, Scully? After everything he's done and gone through? You're still blaming him for something he'll never forgive himself for. It's like carrying around a load of bricks on your back, this hate. Lay it down, Dana. So everyone else can." The silence on the other end was self-explanatory. "So, is there any news on the carpet, Scully?" Mulder asked, hoping to bring Scully back around. "Yes, there are several samples on here. I'm running the databases on them now. As soon as I have them all, I'll email you my report." "OK, Scully, thanks. I really appreciate you putting in the overtime for this." "This is an investigation, Mulder. I would do the same for any other victim. You know that." With that, he was assured of her complete professionalism. They hung up and Mulder finished his report. He was far too keyed up to sleep, so he took advantage of the luxury hotel's fitness center with Olympic-sized pool. He'd brought along his suit in his kit and changed in the locker room. He didn't worry about goggles, since he wasn't seriously swimming. He just wanted to work off some nervous energy by gliding effortlessly through the cool water. Something tickled at his brain, like there was another presence in the pool area. He reached for the wall and brought himself upright, wiping his eyes clear. The familiar form of Alex sat on a chaise lounge, watching him. Mulder hauled himself out of the water and walked over. Alex handed him a towel as he sat on the chaise next to the younger man. "What's up, Alex? Shouldn't you be...with..." "Don't, Mulder. He's upstairs reading. I just..." Alex reached into his pocket and Mulder started. He didn't know what Alex would produce, a weapon maybe, but he pulled out a dollar. Mulder looked at it curiously and asked, "What's this for?" "I need to talk. And you don't see patients for free, do you?" Alex cracked a half-smile and put the dollar on Mulder's wet knee. "I don't really see patients, but if I did, no, I wouldn't see them for free. What's on your mind?" Mulder rubbed his head with the towel and waited for Alex to collect his thoughts. "I think I made a huge mistake coming here." Alex let out a huge breath, as if he'd been holding it for days. "What makes you think that?" Mulder eased back, not looking at Alex. He knew looking at clients would inevitably make them clam right up. "Nothing is going right. All I wanted was to help find Jason Kemp's murderer, and to help capture the men who hurt me, and all I keep doing is making more mistakes. I'm gonna screw this whole thing up and Stockwell is going to go free, then kill me." "I have a hard time believing that he can get the drop on you to kill you, Alex," Mulder said, being perfectly honest. "He did once upon a time, took a shot at me. If I hadn't bent down to pick something up, my brain would have decorated the sidewalk. Mulder, I really was a fool today, going to Stockwell's house. I was with Teddy, too. I love that guy, really. I should have gone home with him the first night I was here. Then none of this would have happened." "True, you wouldn't have suffered. I'm sorry you did, Alex. Believe that. But you have vital evidence, the badge, eyewitness testimony to offer, and you are one of the strongest men I've ever met. While this is a test, it's one I'm sure you can pass." Mulder hoped Alex understood he meant every word he said. "I'm not so sure," Alex said. "I'm making Walter crazy, I know that much. I love him so much, you can't possibly..." "Yes, Alex, I can. I do know how much you love him, how much he loves you. It's...difficult for me, considering my eidetic memory, I forget nothing. I still don't quite get how he's forgotten..." "He didn't forget, he forgave. And after all the work we've done to get the vaccine out, to get the information around, I would have thought you would have looked past me shooting Bill Mulder. He was going to tell you things that would have gotten you killed. No one on the project would have let you live with that information, no matter what protection you had from the Smoking Man, Mulder. You have to understand that. I was sent to protect you, ultimately. I'm sorry it had to be so extreme. I'll be sorry every day for the rest of my life. But you gotta let me off the hook one of these days, OK?" Mulder took a deep breath and cleared his throat. He reached over and patted Alex's hand that rested on the arm of the lounge. "I already have." Walter sat on his bed, reading the autobiography of Benjamin Franklin. He knew Alex was wandering the hotel and wouldn't leave the building, as he made Alex promise. Walter put the book down and strolled into the sitting room. The Omni Presidential suite was something else. He sat on the wide sofa, looking around the room at the wet bar area that concealed a microwave oven and refrigerator in addition to the honor bar. Walter knew he was getting comfortable here. And Alex wasn't. They needed to wrap this case up so he could take his lover home and re-acclimate the man to their former life. The door opened and Alex wandered in, looking tired and depressed. Walter stood and met him halfway into the space. "Baby, talk to me. You OK?" "I'm...I don't know. Mulder was down by the pool. We...talked." Walter did not like the sound of that. He'd always felt that there was an underlying sexual tension between the two men, and no matter the affirmations from Alex that he and Mulder never slept together, he felt that given the opportunity, they both would, just to see if they could tolerate each other long enough to make love. Walter's rational mind told him Alex would never betray him, but the small part of Walter's heart, the part that still chastised him for losing Sharon, for working for the Consortium once upon a time, for letting Alex get the drop on him so many times, that part also told him a beautiful man, so sexual and sensual, would eventually grow beyond Walter's protective nest and search for greener pastures. "What did you talk about?" Walter asked. "Us, this whole case...a lot of things..." Alex walked to the honor bar and poured himself a vodka. "Things you couldn't talk to me about?" Walter asked, quietly. Alex stood still in the middle of the room. He was facing away from Walter and didn't turn back around. "Sometimes, Walt, I just want someone who isn't emotionally involved to tell I'm doing this right," Alex answered, equally as quietly. "My word isn't good enough for you?" This time, Walter stood and strutted over to where Alex remained. "I thought we were doing this together. We need an outside opinion? Someone who doesn't like you anyway?" The level of betrayal Walter felt at that moment was palpable in the air. "Walter, you...love me, anyway. I mean, how can I gauge if I'm doing this right from you? If I'm making a mistake being here? You're the most apologetic person I've ever met, Walter. You apologize to me for Mulder. You apologize to me for Scully. Shit, and you kow-tow to them about me at every turn. Walt, I...I just needed someone who doesn't give a shit about me to tell me I wasn't fucking everything up." Walter bowed his head. "And what did you find?" "That Mulder gives a shit. And I'm not fucking everything up. Walt..." Walter turned to Alex and found himself gathered into the arms of the man he loved. He let Alex kiss him breathless. They made their way back to the bedroom to make love until both fell asleep exhausted. Before he was asleep, Walter kissed Alex's head and whispered, "I'd tell you if you were screwing up." A beat later, Alex whispered back, "Thanks." In the morning, Mulder was banging on their door early, to wake them up. Walter trudged to the door, wrapping himself in his robe, and tore open the door. "This had better be good, Mulder," Walter stated firmly. "It is. Scully is on her way here. She has the results of the tests on the rug." Walter stepped back and allowed Mulder in. "Hey, sir, did you guys order breakfast?" Walter sighed. "No, Mulder, you woke us up. We, unlike you, actually sleep." "Sleep is overrated, sir." Mulder smiled at him, a really sarcastic smile, the kind Walter wanted to slap off his skull. Mulder walked into the suite and looked around. "Have you gotten breakfast yet, sir?" "Breakfast? You woke us up, Mulder! I just told you that! You can order it while Alex and I get dressed." Walter stomped angrily into the bedroom and slammed the door behind him. Alex sat up and looked at Walter. "What's the big idea? I was sleeping." "Get up, get showered, get dressed. Mulder's here and Scully is on the way. She has the lab results for the rug." Walter was already pulling clothes out of the drawers. "Well, if she's gonna give us that kind of news, everyone should hear it. Have Mulder make her meet us at the diner. I want my mom there when we hear this." Walter thought about it a moment, then nodded. "Yes, you're right. The entire community has a right to know. And I like that diner's food better than the breakfasts here." Walter went to the door to stop Mulder from ordering breakfast, telling him they'd be going to the diner, which Mulder preferred anyway. He'd fallen completely in love with Debbie, who obviously treated Mulder better than his own mother had. Mulder was more than happy to cancel the room service and wait for Alex to finish his hair to go to the diner. Mulder called Scully on the drive over to tell her where to meet them. Alex sat in the booth next to Walter with Mulder on the end, with Emmett squished in with Michael and Ben on the other side. They'd pulled another table over for Ted, Brian and Justin, who were all eating their breakfasts and anxiously awaiting the arrival of Mulder's partner. Debbie also hovered around the table. "When the fuck is your partner getting here?" Debbie demanded of Mulder. He looked up, lost for words and just smiled. "Sorry, Mom, I dunno." Mulder shrugged his shoulders. "Mom?" Emmett asked. "Does that mean you, Michael and Alex are all brothers? Mikey! Your family is just growing every day!" "Fuck off, Em. Christ, Mom, do I have to share you with the world?" Michael pouted, with a quick arm around him from Ben. "Relax, Michael. You don't have to share me with anyone." They shared a quick kiss. "Thank God!" Michael exclaimed. They continued eating and just waited, not speaking, not looking around until Emmett dropped his fork loudly. "I cannot take this! My Aunt Lula always said, I was the one with the gift for gab. So, everyone tell me one thing that makes them happy." "Emmett? Shut the fuck up," Brian said, sweetly. He leaned forward and looked at Alex, giving him and intense stare. "You're gonna be fine, man. I'm telling you. Alex looked back at Brian and smiled. Over Brian's shoulder, he could see Justin starting to simmer. "You're a lucky man, Justin. Brian's a good guy. Of course, not as good as Walter, but he's good." Walter gave Alex a gentle elbow to his ribs. He followed it with a kiss on Alex's cheek and they settled back quietly. All too soon, the familiar tiny form of Special Agent Dana Scully came through the door and she stopped cold. Scully wasn't ignorant of Walter and Alex's relationship, but the men were very restrained when she was around. They didn't have to make public displays of affection to tell each other they were happy together. Scully also managed to stay clear of the local gay community in Georgetown; not by design, but just the fact that she knew no one in that part of town to visit with. Upon entering the neighborhood where the Liberty Diner was located, it was almost like a new experience for her. The presence of rainbow flags adorning everything that stood still was a shock in and of itself. More than that, the sight of men walking hand in hand, kissing openly on the streets, some going a little further, as far as they could in the cold weather, was a definite eye-opening experience. Scully had sat at a stoplight and shook her head gently. 'I can deal with aliens from other planets wanting to take over our species, but I can't handle some same-sex couples doing things other couples do? That's not right,' she thought to herself. If she could get past almost having been a colonist's host, she could certainly be comfortable with Gay America. "Hey, sweetie, whacha doin' standing in the doorway? Come on in!" Debbie shouted. Everyone turned to Scully and Mulder, trying to be a gentleman, stood and walked over to welcome his partner. "Debbie Novotny, this is my partner, Agent Dana Scully. Scully, this is Debbie, the resident mother to Pittsburgh's gay community." The women shook hands. "Mulder, I'm sorry, sweetie. When you said partner, immediately I thought it would be a man. Well, come on in, girl! Everyone's dying to hear the results of the tests you did on the rug." Debbie started toward the table, but Scully grabbed Mulder's arm and pulled him back. "Mulder, this is still an official bureau investigation. We should keep this information quiet until it's been seen by a judge." "Oh no, little lady!" Debbie shouted at her. "The stuff you found out is important to everyone here. Not just my angel." Scully turned to Mulder with questions in her eyes. "Angel? Is she serious? She calls Alex her angel?" Scully asked, eyes rolling. She held Mulder's arm, keeping him from walking away. "Scully, Alex is a beloved person in this community. Don't test them. They'll defend him to the death." Scully was taken aback by the serious look on Mulder's face. "OK, Mulder, I get it. But if he's rude to me, I reserve the right to fight back." "Scully, you're going to be surprised when you get to the table; it's a different Alex than we have ever known." Mulder and Scully walked to the table and immediately, room was made for her next to Walter. She sat beside her former boss, who kissed her cheek warmly. She waited for the inevitable "Hey Red!" from Alex, but it never happened. "Good morning, Dana. Thanks for...all your hard work. You didn't have to do this on a rush." Stunned to silence for a moment, Scully cleared her throat and said, "I knew that the expediency of the case was paramount, considering who the suspect is. And who the victims are." "Thank you," was all Alex said back. Scully looked up at the woman who placed a cup of coffee in front of her and said, "Thank you...um..." "You can call me Deb like everyone else. Or mom, like your Mulder there." Scully turned to Mulder and quirked up her eyebrow. "Mom?" "Lay off, Red," Emmett said. "What turns other people on doesn't have to do it for you." Scully turned toward the man wearing the loud neon green paisley shirt. "Excuse me?" "Oh, I'm sorry. Emmett Honeycutt. And you are..." "Oh Christ!" Alex exclaimed. "Where are my manners?" "Beats the shit out of me," Debbie said, chomping on her gum. "Special Agent Dana Scully, this is..." and Alex introduced everyone around the table. When he'd finished, Walter turned to her and held his hand out. "Hi, Walter Skinner, Sugar Daddy." Scully laughed at that, finally seeing her former boss in a new light. "Sweetie, you used to work for this big, bald, beautiful man?" Emmett asked. "Yes, why?" "Before you knew he was gay, how did you keep your hands off him!" The table erupted in nervous laughter until Debbie slammed the steel-bottomed coffee pot on the table and said, "Can we shut the fuck up now so the other gorgeous redhead here can tell us what she came here to tell us?" Scully cleared her throat and smiled. "Thank you. Well, it seems as if there are several different DNA samples on this carpet. I detected four different traces of DNA, one belonging to Jason Kemp, another to the teenage victim whose name we have kept confidential, and the other two belonging to Kenneth Reichert and James Stockwell." The cheers heard around the diner were deafening. Debbie called for quiet and said, "Is that it? Can you arrest him?" "The federal warrant will be coming down with two other agents from our department, John Doggett and Monica Reyes. They will connect with the local bureau office to affect the warrant. I doubt the local police department will be very cooperative under the circumstances." Scully looked over at Alex who had turned his face upward and was smiling gently, tears streaming down his face, and it finally hit her. This man...was a real man, like any other, like her brothers and Mulder and her father. He'd had something terrible happen to him, as terrible as when she was abducted. When she helped Mulder and Alex and Skinner bring down the Consortium, she'd gotten her revenge, taken something back of herself. This was Alex getting back some of his own. Debbie brought over a plate and set it in front of Scully and said, "Dana sweetie, this is our pink plate breakfast special. On the house!" On the plate were two pancakes, scrambled eggs and bacon. "I'm sorry, I can't eat all this...the fat content alone..." "Calm down, sweetie. One thing about gay men, they watch their fuckin' figures closer than women. Those are whole wheat pancakes, egg whites and turkey bacon." Debbie put down a small bowl and a pitcher of what looked like maple syrup. "That's heart-smart margarine and sugar-free pancake syrup. Eat up, sweetie. Who knows when your next meal will be once the shit hits the fan?" Scully smiled and saw the shadow of her mother in this woman. Albeit she was a lot gruffer, and the language would have made her sailor father and brother blush, she was definitely the mother figure of all the men who were turned away from their own. And it seemed her heart was as big as her mouth. Scully began to eat, fully aware of the six sets of eyes trained on her. She patted her mouth with the napkin and turned to Mulder to ask, "Do they always stare like that?" "Straight women are a rarity here," Emmett explained. "Hey, asshole, what am I?" Debbie shouted. "You are...mom, Mom," Michael said. "What Michael means is," Brian broke in, "It's interesting to see a natural redhead." "Where?" Alex said, and began looking around the diner. "I don't see a natural redhead, unless you mean that twink in the far booth...OUCH!" Scully smiled at the way Alex rubbed his right arm where Mulder punched him. "Have some manners, Alex. It's not polite to comment on a lady's appearance with anything other than a compliment." "Well, ladi-fuckin'-da, Mulder," Michael said. "When did you grow culture?" "Mulder was grown with the blue bloods in New England," Alex explained. "Lived up there with the Kennedys on Martha's Vineyard and the like. So he knows how to treat a lady." "Mulder, you reach across me to hit Alex again, you're not getting your arm back," came the low growl from Walter. Mulder sat back and everyone looked at Debbie, looking to change the subject. "Walter, I love you, but if you lay one finger on Mulder, you'll answer to me. And Mulder?" "Yes, Mom?" "Keep your fuckin' hands to yourself." There were snickers around the table. "She told you off, Mulder," Justin commented. "Scully! Save me!" Mulder whined. "OK, Mulder, calm down. I'll shoot anyone that hurts you, I promise," Scully cooed, patting Mulder's head where he put it on her shoulder. "Pardon me?" Emmett asked. "Shoot whom?" "Oh, be careful, Em," Alex warned. "I seen her in action, she doesn't miss." "So, what happens now?" Ben asked, getting everyone back to the matter at hand. "I mean, you have conclusive proof, the warrant is being transported, what do we do now?" "We wait," Walter said. Scully looked over at him and smiled to see the familiar visage of AD Walter S. Skinner in place. "There's nothing we can do now. If we move too quickly, we can lose him, or jeopardize the arrest. Right now, patience is a virtue." "Oh, I got chills, Walter," Mulder said. "Just like you're back at work! See, look at the goose bumps." Mulder pulled up his sleeve to show his arm, which promptly received a slap on the wrist. "What did I tell you?" Alex slammed his coffee cup down and asked to be let up. "I can't just sit here and wait for Doggett and Reyes to get the warrant. All I want to do is just...go. OK?" Alex looked down in Walter's eyes and Scully recognized that look: caged animal. Alex needed to let off some aggression. Mulder and Scully stood to let Alex scoot out of the booth where he started toward the door. He turned to Walter and said, "I have my phone and I won't get into anything. I just need some time to...walk. OK?" "Sure, just be careful, Alex." As Alex walked to the door, Justin elbowed Brian. "Go with him, Brian." "What?" Brian asked. There was silence at the table. "Don't let him go alone, Brian. Come on, I know what it's like to be bashed. It's cool with me. Make sure he's safe, OK?" The two men kissed as Brian grabbed his coat and followed Alex out the door. Scully turned to Walter and asked, "OK, what was that?" Walter smiled and said, "It's kind of complicated..." *-*-*-* Alex walked along Liberty Avenue towards Babylon, but this was not his intention. He didn't know where he was going, but he needed to go somewhere and sitting around with his old family, waiting to see if he was going to be vindicated or set up. If the warrant was quashed, or there was some problem and Stockwell wasn't arrested, he was good as dead because Alex knew he couldn't let Stockwell go unpunished. As much as Alex loved his life, he knew that murder was in his heart. If he had to take his private revenge, Alex knew he would be plunging into the abyss and he didn't know if he could make it out this time. "Hey! Wait up, man!" came the shouts from behind him. He turned to see Brian bringing up the rear. "Slow down, it's hard to run in these Bruno Maglis." "Sorry, I didn't know I had to set the pace for your couture." Alex continued walking, but allowed Brian to fall in step beside him. "It's going to be alright, Lex. I swear it." Brian sounded as sincere as he ever had, Alex thought. "Alex. Stop calling me that other name. I'm not that man anymore. I'm Alex KrycekÉ" "Leader of the human resistance, aide to the president and the famous Fox Mulder to save the planet. Yes, I have a scrap book." Alex turned to Brian, tired of the snarky comments, sick of being strong and annoyed that everyone expected him to be rational, after all the years he spent being irrational. "Fuck you, Brian. You think I give a shit about your little hurt feelings? Huh? I got bigger shit on my plate than your ass scorecard!" Grabbing Alex's shoulder, Brian hauled him around and swung to punch Alex square in the jaw. Blocked with one hand, and countered with the other, Alex swung Brian around and threw him down on a parked car hood, arm twisted up behind him. Alex pressed down against Brian's back and whispered harshly in his ear, "Don't invite trouble you can't handle. I am not the person you want to play macho boy with." Alex let go of Brian and jumped back, waiting for Brian to either retaliate or straighten up. Brian took a moment to stand up and turn around, rotating his shoulder. "Nice moves. I see your jaded past has done wonders for your sense of self preservation. I wasn't going to hurt you." "No, you were going to punch me in the mouth. I'm not that easy, boy." "I'm not a boy, *Aaa* -lex. Maybe once upon a time I was, but no more." "So, what? You wanted to take me back to that loft, ply me with drugs and alcohol and see if you can get a little of my ass, the way I had yours? I know what you're like, remember? Was I one of the precious few who topped you? And you can't deal that I'm with the man I've always loved?" Brian sniffed the brisk morning air. He smiled sarcastically and shook his head. "I thought I would keep you company, listen if you wanted to talk. It's not safe for gays out on the streets alone, remember? And it's even less safe for you. I know being at the diner was just too much. Let's just go to Woody's and have a drink..." Alex started to laugh. "Woody's? Where he found me? Sure, that's great." Brian looked down, trying to breathe deeply. "Man, I'm sorry. Look, I just want to be here for you, OK? It's...I'm sorry, OK? Sometimes I feel like I should have been at Woody's that night to help you out. I feel guilty. And I'm fuckin' pissed that you left and didn't say goodbye!" Alex regarded Brian carefully. He didn't have ulterior motives, just wanted to comfort Alex, make sure the man was safe. "Yeah, I know. So, you still got the best weed in the Burgh? Or do I have the wrong man?" Alex cracked a little smile. He and Brian had gotten high quite a few times, but it had been a decade ago, and Alex hadn't done any illegal drugs since he'd gotten clean after Hong Kong. This would be interesting. Brian replied, "Yeah, I still have everything you want. Come on. Let's go to my place." A short while later, Alex watched Brian roll them a joint and light it, inhaling deeply. He handed it over to Alex then went pour them both shots of vodka. Alex downed his, then let out his smoke, already feeling the familiar tingle and haze overcoming him. He loved being stoned, relished it. It was his only comfort when he was hiding away in Hong Kong, scared of his own shadow, being hunted by two sets of people, both unofficially. It was a nightmare. But that place, that soft and sensual place, stoned and drunk, thinking about Walter and jacking off for hours, that was the place where he wanted to be again. Alex felt a hand on his crotch and turned his head to say something to Brian. His mouth wouldn't work, but Brian's did, right over his, inserting the questing tongue between Alex's lips. Oh, how easy it was to go back to that other place, the one where comfort and hot, sweaty sex soothed him after he left Walter, after he was hurt and left for dead. Brian eased Alex onto his back, slipping his hands under Alex's shirt to feel his body. Alex knew he'd was different than when he last did this with Brian, more muscle, more hair, a little fat, too. He was different. Everything was different. Sitting up quickly, Alex pushed Brian off him. "I'm sorry, I can't do this. I love Walter. I live with him." Alex got up and went to Brian's bathroom, slamming the door and locking it. He looked in the mirror and saw the damning evidence of kiss-swollen lips. He ran water to rinse his face and looked carefully at the bathroom sink. On it was a cup, black and gray marble, and two toothbrushes, one blue and one pink. He figured the pink one to be Justin's as a joke. The boy didn't seem the least bit of a fairy, but a boy trying to find where he fit in the gay community. Brian had it good and didn't even know it. He had a young man who was totally enamored of him and was throwing it away on faceless fucking in the back of Babylon. Alex shook his head. He wasn't going to do that to Walter, no matter what history he had with Brian. His history with Walter went back further. Alex walked out of the bathroom and looked to where Brian sat, bottle of vodka in his hand, holding a cigarette. "Brian, I'm sorry. I'm in love, man. You gotta understand that." Two lazy hazel eyes turned to him and the full lips smiled. "Yeah, I know what you mean, Lex." It didn't bother Alex that Brian continually used that old name. Probably to push his buttons, but it didn't work. In his head, Alex reasoned that Brian said it to hold onto that wonderful time they spent together, that innocent sexual bond they had, when Brian helped Alex get past a devastating time in his life. "Look, I'm gonna grab a cab back to the hotel and rest. I can't...I just want this all to be over and to go back to my life. You know? I have work to do. I want to redecorate my study." "You decorate?" Brian asked, eyebrow askew. "I like that show 'Trading Spaces'. They have a couple of really hot carpenters on there, total eye candy." Brian smiled. "You sound more and more like Ted every time I see you." Alex nodded and took that for the compliment Brian meant it to be. He walked toward the door and looked back at Brian. "Make no mistake. I do love you and I always will. But Walter is my life. And I can't ruin what I have with him to keep alive something we weren't even serious about a decade ago." Brian nodded and with a sad smile said, "Be careful, Alex." Alex nodded and left the loft. *-*-*-* Still feeling a haze of both dope and the sexual charge of Brian's kiss, Alex felt as if the tension wasn't going to eat him alive anymore. He needed Walter. Hell, maybe he could persuade Walter to take him someplace and fuck the remaining worry out of him, get the taste of temptation out of his mouth. He had to wonder, how do the ordinary people do it? Alex smirked at himself; the person he used to be wouldn't have thought twice about fucking Brian. He used to grab little bites of feeling good, feeling human, whenever he could. Now, he knew better. Now he knew it was better to say 'no' sometimes if it meant waiting for something better. Better was Walter. Walter was the best. Without thinking about it, Alex's stride took on his old swagger as he walked down the street. He caught sight of himself in the window of a shop and paused, at first drawn by his distorted reflection. He looked in that fleeting moment to be so young, the man who once walked down this street frequently on his way to the cafe. Standing there, Alex moved until he could see himself in a mirror which stood in the trendy body piercing shop. There he was, an older, happier, and wiser person. He wouldn't trade it for his youth and the perfection of his younger body. Someone came up too close behind him. Alex jumped away, but relaxed when he saw it was one of Emmett's twink friends. "Oh, sweetie," Marve said. Marve was a young, thin, and very pretty light skinned black man that Emmett regarded as one of his sisterhood. "Look at those moss agate earrings. You and the big butch lover of yours would look so good in those. Such a bargain. You'd only have to buy one pair of them." Grinning, Alex said, "You working for this place now, Marve?" Caught, the man grinned sheepishly and said, "Well, maybe, but it's still true. Come one. I'll give you my employee's discount." "I have to check with Walter first," Alex said. Saying it, Alex realized how very true that was. He really needed to check in with Walter. He reached for his cell phone. Damn, where did he leave the thing? Oh, shit, Alex assumed it was back at Brian's. He hesitated. Go back for the cell phone or go back to Debbie's? "This isn't good," Walter said. "I've called him three times now and he's not answering." "He's with Brian," Debbie pointed out. "He might have left his phone on manner mode or who knows. Brian doesnÕt like anyone he's with to think that someone else is more important than him. He might have asked Alex to turn it on." "He might have lost it," Mulder said. "He isn't you," Walter and Scully said at once, before they grinned at each other despite the tension of the moment. "I have mine!" Mulder said, whipping it out. He glanced at his phone and said, "Oh, I had mine turned to silence all by accident. I forgot to lock the keypad." A moment later, Mulder said to his cell, "Hey, Doggett, what's up?" A moment later, Mulder held the phone away from his mouth and said, "Stockwell is gone. He has his service weapon. Reyes has called in an all points, but they're giving her a lot of shit, saying that Stockwell hasn't been arraigned and that he's not a criminal." Enough. Walter stood up so quickly that Emmett, who had been sitting too close to him again, spilled on the floor, uttering a shrill scream of dismay. "I have to find Alex," Walter said. "Take it easy," Michael advised. "Let me check with Brian. See if he's still with him." That didn't take long. Michael said, "He left a few minutes ago. He's alone." "Damn it," Walter growled. Pointing a finger at Scully, he said, "Grab a car and start looking. Anyone else who has a car, do the same. Mulder, come on. We can make good time on foot." Federal Law enforcement and friends of Alex alike responded quickly to Walter's confident bark of command. Mulder, at his side, Walter headed in the direction of Brian's apartment. Mulder and he kept stride. He appreciated Mulder's silence. He didn't want to hear any assurances. He wanted to have Alex in his arms and felt as if he never wanted to let his lover out of his sight again. Mulder occasionally paced to the side to check the alleyways. Walter had no comment although it irritated him that Mulder assumed that Alex had reason to skulk in the darkness. They should all have moved past that. "Stockwell's desperate, over the edge," Mulder muttered. "He doesn't want to face trial and he's not the kind of man who would run away. I know enough from studying the records to know that Stockwell genuinely loves his family. Without them, he has no reason to live. I also know that Stockwell's wife has already filed for divorce. She's not the 'stand by your man' type." "I know," Walter said. "Don't you think I've read everything I can get on the man?" "I know you have, Walter," Mulder said. "Walter, are you armed?" Showing Mulder his sidearm, Walter admitted, "I packed this when Alex and I decided to pursue what happened to him here." "How about Alex?" Mulder asked. "I don't know," Walter said. His conscience stabbed at him as he admitted, "I asked him to not carry. I love Alex. I know he's a good man, but I also know what was hammered into him. He would shoot to kill if threatened. It's the way he lived." "Yeah," Mulder said. "Shit, I wish I knew that he could protect himself." "He might be able to do that even without a gun," Walter said. "He may have been domesticated, but there's still nothing fat and lazy about my lover." "I believe that," Mulder said. He paced ahead and turned back to say, "Come on, Walter. I have a feeling." "I know," Walter said, speeding up. "I have the same feeling. God damn it, Alex, why didn't you stay put?" Someone was following him. Alex felt that creepy sensation that started in the middle of his back and seemed to climb upwards, making all of his hair stand up. He paused to gaze in another window, using the opportunity to glance behind him at the street. Alex saw a car that seemed to pull over suddenly and he abandoned the window. Confirmation. He has a shadow. Reaching for the back of his pants, Alex felt a jolt as his hand brushed nothing but his firm ass. Shit, years of wearing that small of the back holster made it seem like part of his body. Why the hell had he ever agreed to stop going armed? Oh, yeah, Walter...the man who made taking a chance at going undefended worth every risk. Instinct warred in Alex. He wanted to head back to Walter, his safety, his love, but he fought that impulse. If it was Stockwell or someone Stockwell hired, Alex wanted Mom and the rest of the civilians to be safe. No more innocent bystanders, certainly not from among the people he loved. Alex decided to head for the hotel. He could call Walter from there. He weighed the alternatives and decided his best shot was to grab a bus. Stockwell would have to be utterly mad to start firing on a busload of people if it was Stockwell pursuing him. Alex had to consider that not everyone forgave him for his past because of his acts of heroism in defeating the invasion. He had other enemies besides Stockwell. As Alex headed for the bus stop, he saw the car waver as if the driver was considering turning around then it headed toward Debbie's again. Shit, the back of the head looked as if it could be Stockwell's. Alex changed his mind, setting out for the cafe. As soon as he turned around, the car swerved, almost hitting him. He jumped aside and the car went at him again, driving him toward a narrow courtyard between two stores. Alex tried to jump over the car, but it jetted forward, nearly catching him between the vehicle and the side of the building. Scrambling up on the lid of an overflowing dumpster, Alex intended to grab the fire escape ladder that dangled from the building side, but now Stockwell was out of the car. He grabbed Alex by his foot, toppling him to the ground. "Now," Stockwell said, his foot on Alex's throat. "Now, you are going to pay. You made me lose everything. You took my family, my career, my partner from me. You and those other worthless faggots." Finding a snarl of a smile, Alex said, "Fuck your lies, Stockwell. You threw your life away. No one made you." "You're garbage. You belonged in that dumpster. Ken and I did the world a service, killing the scumbags we did. So a few kids got hurt; Ken did a lot of good. He deserved a little recreation. He was a fine, honorable man, a good officer. He didn't deserve to die. You do. You have to die," Stockwell said. "Here, in the trash, where you belong." If some part of Alex believed it, if old feelings surfaced that made him believe his life wasn't worth fighting for, it didn't prevail. Stockwell's foot released a fraction of an inch when he aimed his gun. Enough, enough for Alex to twist his weight to one side, throwing Stockwell off balance for a moment. It was enough for Alex to slam his shoulder into Stockwell's legs and knock him down. Alex's hand reached for the gun. Stockwell grunted as he struggled to shoot. Alex forced the rogue cop's hand down to the filthy concrete. He slammed the gun hand down hard, but Stockwell wouldn't let go. Stockwell was strong, big, athletic, and he was desperate. Alex hadn't let himself go, but he wasn't the man he used to be. He hadn't needed to fight for his life for many years. Stockwell managed to break free of the struggle and rolled to his feet, firing at Alex. Fragments of concrete flew into the air, a shard striking Alex's cheek. He charged Stockwell again despite the gun. The Glock flew into the air, skidding under the dumpster. Alex went after it, grabbed it, twisted and aimed, thinking it could end here. It had to end here. One shot and no more Stockwell. No more boogey man tormenting his dream. "Alex, Alex, no!" Walter's voice said. What did Walter know? He wasn't the one Stockwell had raped. He wasn't the one who still heard Richter and Stockwell grunting and laughing as they forced themselves inside him. "Alex, don't do it," Walter shouted. "We have him. We can take him to trial. That's the right thing. Alex, let's do this right." Ah shit, Walter's voice penetrated to his rational brain and Alex's trigger finger relaxed on the gun. He blinked as he saw Mulder waiting and he lowered the Glock. Alex said, "All right. Arrest him, Mulder." Scully had arrived right behind her partner. The two of them started toward Stockwell. Mulder vaulted over the hood, but as the agent did, Stockwell reached for his back, producing another pistol. It sounded like a barrage of shots. Alex pulled the trigger, his aim deadly, professional, and accurate, saving Mulder's life. Walter and Scully fired at the same time. Stockwell spun as if caught in a hurricane wind. His arms flew out from his sides, his second gun clattering across the courtyard. Mulder and Alex reached Stockwell at the same time, searching the dying man for other weapons with well-coordinated movements. "He's clean," Mulder said. "You okay?" he asked Alex. "Shaky," Alex admitted. Walter came across the car, crowding the other two. Alex let himself find harbor in his lover's arms. It was over, finally over. Sirens sounded, not too far away. Scully said, "Get out of the way, everyone. I have to stop the bleeding." "Let him die," Alex said. "Please, just let him die." Mulder and Walter looked as if they agreed, but they helped Alex over the car, bringing him to rest against Scully's rental vehicle. "Watch over Scully," Walter ordered. "Always," Mulder said, with a brief smile. "She's my partner." Stockwell mumbled, "Ken, Ken ..." Breath rattled out of his chest. There was a silence. Another hitch of breath then no more. "He's gone," Scully said. Alex didn't feel sorry for the man. He got better than he deserved. He let Walter hold him, a handkerchief pressed to his cheek, Walter's hand rubbing his back. He was shaking and he wanted to laugh at his weakness. Shit, there was a time when he played with death, taunted it. Now, he had so much to live for. "I love you," Alex whispered. "I know," Walter said. "I love you, too, even when you make me crazy by doing things like running off on your own. If we hadn't come looking." "Stockwell would have died sooner," Alex replied. Now police swarmed on the scene and medics arrived at the same time. Doggett and Reyes arrived as well. "What happened here?" demanded an older cop. "He tried to kill Alex," Walter said. "Why would Chief Stockwell try to kill anyone?" the cop asked. He looked shaken and disgusted. "If your unprofessional police force had taken that all points, Stockwell would be under arrest," Doggett said, eyes more icy blue than Alex remembered. "There's going to be an investigation. I'm not letting it drop." "Who shot him? That fag?" the police officer asked. "I'm going to arrest him." "Well," Mulder said. "You better be prepared to arrest a couple FBI agents too. I know I got a shot in and I think Walter and Scully shot him at the same time that I did." Frustrated, the officer shook his head and said, "No, sir, I was mistaken. No one will be arrested." "That's damn right," Doggett said. He glanced at Walter and Alex and asked, "You okay?" A medic insisted on looking at Alex. Others loaded Stockwell onto the ambulance. Alex could see they were still working on the man, but he could tell by the wounds that Stockwell wasn't coming back. That was a comfort. A bandage on his cheek, Alex let himself be helped into Scully's car. They would all have to go into police headquarters for questioning, but, at least, Alex wouldn't have to ride in a police car. He and Walter sat in the back, Walter holding onto him after he buckled Alex's seatbelt for him. "We could have nailed him," Mulder said, sounding disappointed. "I think we had enough evidence. The other victims ..." "The other victims who lived will sleep better, knowing the bastard is dead," Alex said. Mulder must have opened his mouth to argue because Walter said, "Enough, Mulder." "Yeah," Mulder said. "Sorry, Alex." "It's all right," Alex said. "All I want is to go home, for this to be over." The inquest was short, but even so, Alex could hear the media shuffling around outside the courtroom. Stockwell's body had four bullets in it, one from Mulder's gun, one from Scully's, one from Walter's, and the last, from the gun that Alex had wrestled from Stockwell's hands. It had proved to be Kenneth Reichert's service pistol. Stockwell had taken it from the evidence room, perhaps, he had intended to shoot Alex with both guns, taking revenge for himself and his partner. The judge ruled the death a justifiable homicide, in the line of duty for Mulder and Scully, self defense for Alex, and Walter...well, Walter's shot was creatively interpreted self defense too, since Stockwell had been aiming in his direction as well as at Alex. Half of Liberty Street seemed packed into the corridor outside the court room. Alex walked into Mom's fervent embrace while accepting pats on the back from Mike, Ted, Emmett, and Justin. Brian stood back, smirking quietly as if he didn't care, but Alex understood that. Brian was here and that said enough. "Angel, do you think you can pull some strings to have that boy placed in my care?" Debbie said. "I've been visiting Jesse and he's making a lot of progress. They said he might be ready for a foster home soon. Hearing that Reichert and Stockwell were both dead did him a lot of good. He said that dead was better than a trial." "There'll be enough trials," Alex said. "They have enough internal investigations going on to keep them busy for the next year." "You and Walter have to come back for some of the hearings," Mom asked. "Yeah," Alex said, "But don't worry. I wouldn't stay away. Not anymore. My ghosts are laid to rest now. When I come back here, the only thing I will be thinking about is spending time with you and my friends." "You betcha," Mom said. "I'm going to be seeing Mulder, too. He needs meat on his bones. Besides, I'm sure that Tekumi and him just need to spend some more time together and ..." That made Alex laugh. Mom, the matchmaker... Brian leaned on the wall, looking sexy and elegant. Alex walked over and with a glance backwards at Walter, kissed his one time lover goodbye. "Listen, Brian," Alex said. "You got something good with that kid, Justin. You're wasting it. Believe me. You're not going to miss fucking around. Stop being such a coward. Commitment isn't a bad thing." "Commitment is for wannabe straight guys," Brian said. "And maybe for dykes." "Got to grow up at some point, Peter Pan." Alex said. "Love you anyway." Brian shrugged and said, "See me when you get tired of the old stud." "Ain't never going to happen," Alex said. Sitting in the rented Expedition, Alex reached over, letting his hand rest on Walter's knee. "Regrets?" Walter asked. "About Brian?" Alex said. "No, just that I wish I could make him stop running away from anything that looks like love. He doesn't know how good it can be. Like it with us, Walter." "I can't believe I was jealous of him," Walter said. "Can't believe you were either," Alex said. "You ready to go home?" Walter said. "More than," Alex said, leaning back. Still as Liberty Street faded from his view, Alex knew that part of him would always feel that this was his home. Now the horror of the past was fading. When he thought of Pittsburg, Alex would remember Deb at the diner, Emmett's flamboyant gestures, Ted's sad eyes, and Brian's beauty. He would think of Michael and his sibling rivalry at war with his loving heart. This was the first place where Alex had a taste of really living, of the chance to have friends who cared about him. Reaching for Walter's leg again, Alex realized that he was leaving home at the same time he was returning home. Walter glanced at him, his eyes questioning. Alex said, "Love you. Love you always. When I come back here, I want it always to be with you." And Walter's eyes lit with love. The End ursula4x@aol.com yankeestarbuck@yahoo.com

Title: Wayfaring Stranger: Lost and Found Author: Amazon X and Ursula E-mail: yankeestarbuck@yahoo.com and ursula4x@aol.com Feedback: Why, yes, thank you! Category: slash, X-over (XF/QAF) Rating: NC-17 Summary: Alex goes home, to settle old scores. Archive: We'll send it ourselves. Disclaimer: Not mine, never were, I have no money. Amazon X Notes: Well, it too long enough but here is the exciting conclusion to "Wayfaring Stranger". And yes, it's VERY exciting. I oughta know, I just reread it and I was excited all over again! I'd like to thank Ursula for coauthoring this with me. We both went through a rough patch while writing this, and thankfully, we could both be there for each other. It was a great pleasure writing with you, sweet lady. I hope to do it again, very soon. My love to Mama Beast as well, for her amazing beta. What a wonderful lady! Enjoy everyone! Ursula Notes: Linda and I thought of the idea for this story over a year ago. When we worked out the story frame, we realized we needed a prequel to set the scene. So we wrote Wayfaring Stranger 1. Then we worked on the actual story body over months of time as each of us had the time between the pressures of work and the pleasures of play. I am proud of this story and am proud to co-author with Linda. Our different visions of the characters produced a hybrid that is part of us both. Thanks also to Paula...a.k.a Mama Beast for the insightful beta. We didn't use every suggestions, but we thought about each of them. back to top

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