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Bumper Sticker – Tailgate

Part V
by Raven


"I didn't do it!" Fox's protest rang with innocence, and more than a few hurt feelings.

Alex and Walter shared a look, both men confused. Fox had been home all day, alone. Walter and Alex had needed to buy some materials for the birdhouses they were building together. It was a charity project, with the houses being sold at silent auction to raise money for the local homeless shelter. It was a themed auction, every item needing to be connected to the idea of home. The three men had settled on the idea of building and selling birdhouses, with Walter and Alex doing the construction, while Fox handled design and painting. Fox simply wasn't safe around power tools, even when he tried.

"But, Fox, sweetheart, you were the only one home. Alex and I just got back, you know that."

"I don't care, I didn't do it." Fox was beginning to sulk, just a bit. Any hint that he wasn't believed completely and immediately could bring out his vulnerable side. It took Fox right back to the FBI, and being "Spooky" Mulder, with his wild theories and lonely vigilance.

Walter made no move to touch Fox, knowing it wouldn't be received well, but he hastened to say with great sincerity, "I believe you, Fox. We believe you, this is us, your lovers. Don't do this, babe. Keep it in the here and now."

Fox struggled a moment, then flushed a bit, ducking his head. "I'm sorry."

It was heart-felt, and Alex and Walter both moved to take him into their arms, giving him the reassurance he could now accept.

"It's alright, Foxy." Alex, using a rare pet name to cheer his lover, kissed the still pouty mouth soundly. "Walter's right, we do believe you. We're just trying to figure out where it came from, and when. Between the three of us, we should be able to figure out something as simple as the sudden appearance of a bumper sticker."

Relaxing, Fox allowed a small smile. "If we can't, we were seriously overpaid during our time with the Bureau."

Walter patted the round bottom under his palm affectionately. "That's my Fox. Now, let's start at the beginning. We left about two hours ago. While we were gone, did you go anywhere?"

"No. I stayed here the whole time. I wanted to finish the final revisions, so I did that first. Then I went downstairs to the basement and started mixing the paint colors I wanted for later. After that, I took a shower and got dressed. I came downstairs, turned on the TV to get ready for the game, and you guys pulled up."

They had entered, and begun teasing him about the bumper sticker. Like the last one, it was only put on with tape, not really attached, and when Fox had seemed bewildered, Alex had brought it inside. It was on the table now, and Fox glared at it.

"I think I'm a little hurt that you assumed it was me, based on the wording. Am I really that...arrogant?"

"Yes." Alex answered it with no hesitation, causing Walter and Fox to both turn to him. When he had their attention, he winked and continued. "Just like I'm really that soulless and Walter's really that repressed."

The grin broke through then, and Alex accepted the light punch on his arm from Fox for the tease.

"C'mon, Fox, you know better than that. But you are extremely bright, and constantly amaze both of us with just how much you've got packed in that pretty head of yours."

"Exactly, Fox. Look, I know you worry about that, being arrogant. But do you honestly think Alex or I would let you get out of control in that area? No, love, you start getting too big for your breeches, we'll just take them down and paddle that ego back to size."

Fox's face took on an almost shy aspect, and he leaned against Walter's chest. "Promise?"

It was faint, but needy, and Alex and Walter both hugged him tighter.

"We promise."

"Now," Walter eased him back, and the three men looked again at the bumper sticker. "Where the hell did that thing come from? It obviously wasn't one of us, so who else would do it? Neighbors?"

"Nah." Alex was frowning as he thought. "Not mean-spirited or funny enough for a prank."

Suddenly, Fox snapped, his face showing clearly that he thought he'd figured it out. Grabbing the phone, he punched numbers, while Walter and Alex listened curiously.

"Hi, how are you? ... Good, that's good... We're fine, thanks. Listen, could you put the little woman on for a minute? I need to ask her a quick question. ... Thanks. You, too. ... Scully? Listen, did you come by earlier? ... When? ... I was in the shower, sorry... So that sticker... They assumed it was me... Oh, now it occurs to you that I might have gotten my ass tanned..."

Walter and Alex grinned, mystery solved. They weren't surprised by Fox's plain talk about punishment, either. They'd told her, somewhat reluctantly, when they'd begun the discipline relationship, knowing that as Fox's primary care physician, the truth might reveal itself to her in more embarrassing ways. To their surprise, she'd handled the news well, just silently handing Walter a pamphlet on Carpal Tunnel Syndrome.

"No, they weren't mad, but I'm hurt. Is that what you really think of me, pard? ... Oh, really! ... Hang on, I'm going to put on the speaker phone, okay?" He did so, pushing the button and hanging up the receiver. "Now, would you please say that again?" Fox looked smug, and his lovers braced themselves. Scully's voice, somewhat tinny from the speaker, dutifully spoke.

"I said, I didn't buy it for you. I bought it for Alex."

"Me? I know shit compared to these two." It was an instinctive response, and while Walter and Fox said nothing, they each noticed the comment, filing it away for later.

"Alex, last week, when your husbands and mine were out of town and I had that leak, what did you do?"

Alex blushed. He hadn't exactly mentioned this to Fox or Walter. "I fixed it for you, but that was nothing."

"The roofer I called took one look and told me there was nothing else that needed done. He said that, quote 'Your friend's patch job is better than most professionals final fix.' And the week before that, when I mentioned that William was having trouble adjusting to daylight savings time?"

"Dana, that was..."

"Answer the question, Alex. What did you do?" It was pure Agent Scully interrogating, but with a top coat of 'Mom' voice.

Alex stood a fraction straighter, and quietly answered. "I told you how to reset his internal clock."

"When I couldn't get the rust stain off my silk jacket, you told me how to fix it. When I didn't have any buttermilk for that recipe, you told me what to sub."

"So?" The face was faintly pink but, despite his awkwardness, Alex felt himself warming with what Scully was saying. He'd never imagined that they could be friends, much less that she'd be praising him like this someday.

"Alex, I call you a dozen times a week, usually just to talk to an adult that knows what it's like to work in the home all day, but I've never had a question you couldn't answer, a problem you couldn't solve. It just seems like you know about everything, Alex, and if you don't know, you know where to find out. You always know where to begin, Alex, and that just floors me."

Alex was picking at the zipper of his jacket, eyes firmly down, but he was smiling, too.

"So, I was in the store with William, thinking how wonderful it was to have him back on schedule, and I saw the bumper sticker. It just made me think of you. I don't even try to figure things out sometimes, Alex, I just call you, because I know that you'll know. I'd been noticing the bumper stickers on the van, and thought you wouldn't mind, but I put it on with tape in case. Is it okay?"

"It's great." His voice was husky with emotion, and Scully the mother picked up on it, understanding that her casual praise and thank you were threatening to overwhelm Alex.

"I'm glad. Oh, hey, when's that auction again? I've got those forms to turn in still."

"The 18th. They need to be in by noon." Alex took a deep breath, the change in subject helping him regain his control.

"Got it. Okay, anything else, guys? I've got two guys of my own over here, and they're both staring at my breasts." A choked sound of outrage in Doggett's flat tones could be heard in the background and, with a laugh, they hung up.

"Walter, somebody's been a very good boy." Fox teased it, and Alex's mouth broadened of its own volition.

"Yes, he has. I think he deserves to have that rewarded, don't you?"

"Absolutely. I think he needs some pampering. A long hot bath, a massage, a total body massage." Fox's hand drifted to the zipper of Alex's jeans, stroking the flesh just beginning to stir.

"I think you're right, Fox. But first, there's a small unpleasantness to deal with."

Alex's eyes lost a little of their sparkle, and his mouth grew serious.

"What did you mean, when you told Dana that, compared to us, you didn't know shit?"

Alex swallowed. Walter wasn't angry, but he was serious.

"I just mean...well, you're a certified genius, Fox. Documented genius, if you hadn't gone into this field, you could have done anything, been anything. And you, Walter, you've got a degree from one of the better schools in the country, not to mention your training in the Marines and FBI. You're both just smart, I listen to you talking sometimes, the conversations you have about philosophers and art and music and..." He trailed off, but Walter's hand came under his chin, gently tilting it up.

"And?"

"And I know I don't fit. Not there, not like that. I'm not denying my importance to you, or my place here with you. You both love me and need me, and even if I don't have your education, I have my own talents and abilities. I'm not less, just different."

Alex's words allowed Fox and Walter to relax, and when he saw that they believed him, Alex couldn't help a small sigh of relief. The last time he'd said he didn't belong with them, they'd taken turns spanking him until he'd re- tracted, re-canted and re-enlisted. It had been a couple of days before his ass had fully recovered from that little bit of flawed thinking.

"That's all I meant, Walter, honest."

"Good enough. But I still don't like hearing you talk that way about yourself. And you should have talked to us about this sooner, Alex, that's the rule."

"I know. It just wasn't easy to bring up. And I didn't want you to stop talking together like that. Even if I don't know what the hell you're talking about, watching you two debate the finer points of the Bauhaus movement is a thing of beauty. I didn't want to lose that."

"Point taken. Now, drop your pants, sweet. A short spanking, but a good one."

Alex caught Fox's rueful glance, but knew Fox agreed with Walter on this or he would have spoken up by now. He unfastened his pants, and slid the denim down to mid- thigh, his navy boxer briefs following. He was somewhat surprised when Fox provided the lap, but stretched out across the long thighs without protest.

Fox only held him, a hand carding through his hair, the other resting on one of Alex's thighs. Walter knelt beside them, and slapped down firmly on the bare bottom. It was a sharp hot smack, and Alex flinched a little. Fox's hand in his hair soothed him, as two more hard spanks landed.

"Talk to us, Alex."

"Yes, Walter."

"Done."

Alex felt them both ease his clothing up, and then he was being cuddled, his smarting backside forgotten under the press of their kisses.

"Okay, punishment's over. Now, it's time for your reward, baby, and we're going to make it good."

Fox's tongue echoed Walter's promise, and Alex was glad Scully had bought the sticker, even if he'd gotten spanked. He'd take it anytime, if it meant Scully was impressed with him, Fox wanted to pamper him, and Walter wanted to reassure him. And deep down, where even he wouldn't admit it, Alex really, really liked that those words were for him.

" To save time, let's just assume I know everything. "

THE END.

xx

raven@aeneas.net

Title: Bumper Sticker Series - Tailgate, Part 5
Author: Raven
Email: raven@aeneas.net
Pairing: M/K/Sk
Rating: PG-13
Warnings: contains a few swats
Summary: The guys are living the American Dream, happiness reigns. Expressions of love and appreciation, left on the back of a van.
Disclaimer: The characters within these stories belong to Fox, 1013, CC et al. There is no profit made or intended from these stories, and they should be considered as being for entertainment purposes only.

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