"Is she going to be all right?" Mulder asked.
"The doctor will be able to tell you when he knows anything."
"We'll wait here for you," Alex said, squeezing his hand.
She looked much smaller and paler than he could remember
seeing her since she was a child. She gave him a smile. The doctor
was in the room with her, writing on her chart.
"So, we're going to order those tests, and then we'll see what's
going on," he said. He turned as he heard the door open. "This is
your brother?"
She nodded. "Yup. He comes back from the dead, too. It
runs in the family."
"It's the Mulder family characteristic," he agreed. Turning to
the doctor, he asked, "How is she?"
"I want to run some more tests before I can tell you that."
"She's fine," Beth said, waving. "Hello, I'm over here.
Remember me, the patient?"
"Oh, so fainting and bleeding in ladies' rooms is normal for
you?"
"Well, not for a while, but—"
"I'll get those tests ordered," the doctor said, interrupting
them. Mulder walked him out.
"So, what's really going on?" he asked.
"We'll know better tomorrow. Luckily, we've been able to get a
medical history sent from her doctors in Canada. I'm having an
oncologist on staff look at it right now."
"An oncologist?" All the colour had drained out of Mulder's
face. "Cancer?"
"You didn't know? Yes, Mr. Mulder, your sister had cancer as a
child. The oncologist will be able to tell you much more than I can."
"And tonight?"
"She's comfortable. Her vital signs are stronger. Until we
know what we're dealing with, all we can do is keep an eye on her.
She'll probably sleep through the night."
When he returned to the room, Dana was in with Beth.
"Tell your mom I'm sorry I fainted on her," Beth smiled, weakly.
"It's not the first time it's happened. She had four kids. She's
seen everything." Dana gave her hand a squeeze. "Don't worry
about it." She glanced at Mulder. "I'll leave you alone."
After she left, he asked, "Why didn't you tell me?"
"We haven't exactly had much of a chance for the catch-up
discussions, have we? I mean, ever since I got here, we've both just
been rushing around, with one thing and another. It just caught up
with me, that's all. I'm sure I'm fine."
"The cancer—"
"Is something I beat a long time ago. I can do it again. I'm
strong." She smiled at him. "I never did tell you how I met my
husband, did I?" He shook his head. "Jack and I met when we were
sixteen, at a summer camp for kids with cancer. We couldn't have
been more different—me, Little Orphan Annie, he—he had money,
opportunities, and no hair," she laughed. "I had a little bout with
leukemia, that was completely treatable. But nobody ever said it
wouldn't come back."
"They don't know that that's what it is."
"Oh, they do. They all have the 'doctor' look on their faces. I
got real good at reading that when I was a kid." She squeezed his
hand. "Don't worry. Come here." He perched on the edge of her
bed, gingerly. "I haven't even had a chance to say how glad I am
that you're here, and okay. What happened?"
He shook his head. "It's not important."
"Oh, yeah, I forgot—you disappear all the time."
"Occupational hazard," he shrugged.
"Where's Alex?"
"Outside."
"Go home."
"I'm not going to leave you."
"Fox, I'm going to be here for a while. They're going to come
in, take most of my blood, take my temperature, and generally poke
and prod at me. In a couple of hours, probably tomorrow, they'll
have a educated guess. Until then, there's nothing you can do
except watch me sleep. Believe me, it's much less fascinating than
it seems. Go home, hug your boyfriend—or whatever it is you do."
She laughed, teasing.
"If you're sure—"
"I'm sure. It's all I can do to keep my eyes open now." She
gave an exaggerated yawn.
"I'll be back first thing in the morning."
"I'll count the hours. Now go."
He gave her a kiss and reluctantly left the room.
"How is she?" Alex asked, as Mulder left the room.
He shook his head. "She seems fine. I'm a wreck. It's cancer."
Alex nodded. "Dana told me." He put an arm around Mulder's
shoulders. "What can I do?"
"Take me home and put me to bed."
"Gladly. I've been waiting to do that for days."
Alex didn't sleep at all that night, but, happily, it wasn't with worry.
Although concerned about Beth, he couldn't focus on anything right
at the moment except for the fact that his lover was there beside
him, in his arms, in their bed. Safe. Alive.
Mulder shifted against him.
"You don't have to pretend you're asleep, you know."
A sigh, and then Mulder moved to turn the bedside light on.
"You want to go out on the couch?" Alex asked.
A shrug. "I don't know."
"You want to make love?"
A smile. "Always."
Alex kissed him. "Why don't you tell me what happened?"
"When?"
Alex raised an eyebrow. "Anytime."
"You know, that couch thing is sounding better and better—"
Alex's mouth cut him off. "Don't."
"I don't understand any of it," Mulder said. "What happened to
me, what's happening to Beth, Juda—" He shook his head. "None
of it makes any sense."
"So we figure it out."
"As easy as that?"
"I don't think the word 'easy' is one that should ever be
included in our respective vocabularies," Alex said, ironically.
"Oh, I don't know," Mulder smiled. "I've often found that the
word coming into my mind when I'm thinking of you."
Alex picked up a pillow, threatening him, but had to laugh.
"Fine. I deserved that."
"An admission that I'm truly grateful for, believe me." He slid
his arms around Alex's waist. "I love you."
"I know." Alex tightened his arms around Mulder for a minute,
and added, "Don't go anywhere again, okay?"
"Promise. The next time, I'll take my anti-knockout-drug pills,
before I leave the house."
"I'm serious. I couldn't go through the last two days again.
Your mother—"
"My mother," Mulder groaned, cutting him off. "I didn't call her."
"Dana did, when you were in with Beth."
"Did she say anything?"
"Nothing that Dana mentioned."
"Damn."
"You can't force her to care, Mulder."
"I know that she cares. She's just afraid. I just don't know if
she could handle losing her daughter again."
"She didn't really handle it the first time," Alex pointed out.
"When Samantha disappeared, I thought I wasn't enough for
her," Mulder said. Alex stilled, surprised at the admission. "I knew it
wasn't about that, but I felt like I was invisible to her, sometimes.
She just shut down all of her feelings, so she couldn't be hurt by
anything anymore. I don't know that my father didn't deserve that,
somehow—"
"But you didn't," Alex said. "You were a kid."
"Not for long. Or maybe I didn't ever really grow up at all." He
shrugged. "I don't know."
They were silent for a while.
"Thank you for telling me that," Alex said.
Mulder shrugged, again. When it was obvious that neither of
them would be able to sleep anytime soon, Alex got out of the bed.
He grabbed Mulder's hand and pulled him out, too. "Come on," he
said, snagging one of the blankets.
"Where—" Mulder started, then let himself be dragged along.
Alex walked into the living room, lay down on the couch, and
held his arms open. Mulder smiled at him, and lay down in front of
him, laying his head on one crooked arm. Alex spread the blanket
over them, and Mulder clicked the tv on. When he arrived at a truly
terrible infomercial, he stilled his channel-surfing.
He arched his neck, feeling Alex's mouth kissing it's way
down...
When Walter and Dana arrived home, it was late, and both were
exhausted.
"Are you hungry?" Walter asked.
"Starving," Dana replied. They looked at each other for a
moment, glanced at the kitchen, and she said, "Let's go to bed."
He nodded, wrapping an arm around her.
She started to undress as he went into the bathroom. It
seemed to take a great deal of effort just to get her stockings off.
She snagged a corner of them—new ones, of course- on the
bandage on her finger, then sat stock-still as she realized what she'd
done.
Glancing at her watch, she realized that it was probably too late
to call the lab. But her phone hadn't rung, and Diane said that she'd
call when she knew anything, so—Grabbing her purse, she groaned
when an inventory of it's contents revealed the lack of her cell
phone. She vaguely remembered dropping it in the car on her way
to the hospital that afternoon.
"Dammit."
The light on the answering machine was blinking, and she was
almost afraid to switch it on.
The first two were work, for Walter. The third was Alex. The
fourth proved to be from Diane:
"I didn't want to leave a message, but I knew you'd want to
know, and I couldn't get a hold of you. There wasn't anything in the
needle, Dana—from what I can tell, it was a new one."
She let out a breath that she hadn't even realized she'd been
holding, and sank down on the bed.
"That was the lab?" Walter asked, coming out and sitting on the
edge of the bed.
Dana nodded.
"Well?"
She collapsed beside him. "Thank god," was all she said, then
she burst into tears.
When he awoke, he could feel Alex's still-steady breathing against
the back of his neck. The infomercial had ended, and he was about
to reach for the remote, when he realized what had replaced it: "War
of the Worlds."
He gave a laugh. The small movement was enough to wake
Alex up, behind him.
"What?"
"Look," Mulder said, pointing at the tv.
Alex had to laugh, too. "Do I finally get to see how it ends?"
"That depends," Mulder grinned, turning carefully on the couch.
"On—"
"On whether you really want to watch the movie, or—" Mulder
trailed off, kissing him.
"Oh," Alex moaned. "Um—"
"You have to think about it?"
"Well, it has been a long time since I've seen this movie—"
he teased, but it was cut off by a moan as Mulder started kissing his
neck. "We could always rent it," he said, pulling his lover closer.
"Uh-huh."
"Let's go to bed."
"We've never made love on this couch," Mulder said, wrapping
his arms around Alex.
"I know," Alex said, smiling. "Let's go to bed."
"I want to have children."
"Right now?"
Dana smiled. "I'm serious," she admonished him, brushing her
hair across his chest. "We've never really talked about it."
"No," Walter agreed. "So, when?"
"You want them?"
"I want everything that we can possibly have together.
Besides, I think we'd have some pretty cute kids—if they all turned
out to look like their mother."
"Well, if they're boys—"
"Doesn't matter." He kissed her. "So, when do you want to
have them?"
She thought for a while. "I can't think of a good reason to wait.
I mean, anything could happen to either of us, at any time. I think
today just proved that to me." She shifted. "I'm not doing this
because I'm afraid of dying, but—"
"But, there isn't really a good reason not to start trying now."
She smiled. "No." She closed her eyes, and felt his hands
trailing up her back. "I love you. I want to have children with you. I
want us to have a long life together, and not look back and regret that
we didn't do something. Besides," she added ruefully, "I'm not
getting any younger."
He raised an eyebrow at her. "I hardly think you're pushing
over the hill. You should be more concerned about me. I'm the one
who's going to be chasing these kids around, a job suited for a much
younger man."
She kissed his strong chest. "I don't know many men who are
in better shape than you are, older or younger. You'll do fine, believe
me."
"So, how many do you want?"
"Could we start off with one?"
"Oh," he teased, "you don't want to just have triplets, and get it
over with?"
She grimaced at him. "Don't joke—multiple births run in my
family."
"Really?"
"Yes," she nodded. "I've got three sets of twin cousins, and
one set of third-cousin triplets. So it's a definite possibility."
He looked at her for a long minute. "What?" she prodded.
"I'm just trying to imagine you pregnant," he said. "I can't
picture it—you're so small."
"Well, that will all change, believe me. Will you still love me
when I've gained thirty pounds and am retaining water?"
"I'll still love you when you've gained fifty pounds with our
twins." She punched him, and he laughed.
"I'm serious," she said. "If I end up having a multiple birth just
because you insist on tempting fate—"
"We're not going to have anything if we don't get some
practice in," he said, and turned her on her side. He slid his hands
down the curves of her body, making her shiver. "I love you."
"I love you."
The bedroom proved to be almost too far away, but they made it.
Mulder pushed Alex down on his back, and straddled him, pushing
his arms up over his head, pinning him down. He held Alex there
with one hand grasping his wrists, and trailed the other down over his
body. The touch was feather-light, and punctuated by kisses. Alex
was biting his lip, trying not to give in to the teasingly light caresses,
but the onslaught was rapidly breaking through his control. Mulder
wouldn't let up until he was rewarded with a moan.
"That's what I wanted to hear," he smiled, moving his mouth up
to nibble Alex's ear. "Was that so hard?"
Alex answered by arching his body up to contact with Mulder's.
The proof of just how hard it was, indeed, met with his lover's erection.
Mulder laughed, delighted. "Oh, well, okay, then."
"Has anyone ever told you that you're an expert at torture? I
think your true calling is being lost in the X-Files."
"Oh?"
"Uh-unh." Alex's words were getting shorter, as he struggled
to catch his breath. "You should be interrogating guerrillas in some
jungle."
"I hardly think they'd let me use these methods."
"You never know—" He gave a push, and managed to get
Mulder over on his side. "Ah—this is better." He moved his mouth
closer to Mulder's, but his head turned at just the last second, and
the kiss ended up catching his ear. "Tease," he whispered, giving
the earlobe a nuzzle.
"Takes one to know one."
Alex burst out laughing. "That is the most juvenile thing I've
ever heard come out of your mouth."
"You're kidding me."
"Nope," he shook his head. "You're usually so—so—"
Mulder raised an eyebrow. "Serious?"
"I was going more towards 'dour', but serious would do."
"Dour?"
Alex nodded, biting back his grin.
"I'll show you dour—" He pushed Alex over again, in a mimic of
their earlier position, and straddled him. The fingers once again
brushed down his body, but this time the touch was surer. He
started tickling Alex.
"No, Mulder—Mulder, please, I apologize."
"Say uncle."
"Never." He yelped with laughter. "Mulder—" When the
tickling didn't stop, he breathed—"uncle, uncle, uncle!" It still didn't
stop. "Mulder!"
"No, it's not good enough. You should have said it the first
time. The penalty is going to be much worse, now."
"Wh- what?"
"You have to do whatever I want."
"That's easy," Alex said, on the verge of hiccups. "I always do
whatever you want."
"Well, good." He finally stopped the onslaught. "Am I too
controlling?"
"Yes. You're controlling, and single-minded, and anal—"
Mulder made a face "- and you fold your socks instead of rolling
them—"
"It's a wonder you haven't left me yet."
"—and beautiful, and loving, and silly, and I'm in love with
you." Alex kissed him. "That, plus your exceptional taste in men, is
why I fell in love with you."
"Is that all?"
"Well, you love me back, and that always helps."
"It's the exceptional taste in men that you mentioned." Mulder
licked at his neck. "Mmm, and you do taste very good."
They lay there together, not moving, as Alex caught his breath.
"Do you think we're ever going to take that vacation?" he asked.
"Eventually. Things have to even out after a while. It's the law
of averages."
Alex rolled his eyes. "Please—'average' is another bad word
for us."
"I guess so. How about we start planning now?"
"But Beth, and the investigation." Alex groaned. "Not to
mention what InSec is going to—"
Mulder's mouth cut him off. "We plan it out, get an itinerary,
pack a bag, and the first sight of anything even remotely resembling
normality, we get the hell out of here. Okay?"
"Okay." Alex's eyes followed the path of his hand as it trailed
down Mulder's chest. "What is it that you wanted me to do for my
punishment?"
"I think you've come up with a pretty good idea on your own."
"Do you have any preference for names?"
"Are you that sure that it worked already?" Dana laughed.
Walter smiled. "Well, you never know."
She thought for a moment. "What were your parents' names?"
"Hillary and Thomas."
"Hmm. That's not bad—Thomas Skinner. It has a ring to it."
"What about your parents?"
"I don't know—for middle names, maybe. My mother's still
alive, and my brother's named for my father."
"Katherine's always good."
She scrunched up her nose. "Every Irish-Catholic family has at
least one Katherine."
"Why buck tradition?"
"How about something completely new? Give this kid a
chance to forge his—or her—own path."
"I always liked Emily." "Let me guess—you dated an Emily."
He chuckled. "She was my girlfriend in third grade. She used
to bring me cupcakes for lunch. They were terrible."
"I bet you ate every one."
"Of course. I was four feet nothing, and she was bigger and
heavier than me. My mother didn't raise no fools."
She laughed. "Always the gentlemen."
"Maria?"
She shook her head. "My roommate in college. She stole my
boyfriend."
"Helen?"
"Too blonde."
"Okay, you suggest."
She lay back and thought, wrinkling her forehead. "Brian?"
"Lawyer."
"Steven?"
"Way too blonde."
She smiled. "I give up."
He twined their fingers together. "I know it's not strictly new,
but how about Melissa?" he asked, softly.
Her smile faded a little, and she closed her eyes, but when she
opened them again, she looked serene. "I think that's a beautiful
idea." She ran their still-joined hands down across her stomach.
"Melissa Skinner. It even sounds good together."
He nodded, kissing the top of her head. "I don't know if you're
in there yet, Melissa, but your mom and I are anxious to meet you."
"Maybe we should try it again—just to make sure it worked?"
She slid in a bit closer to her husband.
"Oh, by all means," he agreed, and pulled her mouth up to
meet his.
Alex moved his mouth down Mulder's chest, then up again, capturing
that beautiful mouth with his own, as his hands continued their
exploration, by feel alone. He found the erection pressed up
urgently against Mulder's stomach, and wrapped his hands around it,
stroking lightly. Small moans sounded from deep in Mulder's throat,
even as their mouths were still exploring each other.
The gentle stroking continued, unabated, as he brought his
lover closer to climax. His own body was on fire, as Mulder pulled
him closer, hands at the small of his back, bringing their bodies into
contact, crushing his own hands in between. He opened his eyes to
stare into deep hazel, searching for what, he couldn't say.
Mulder smiled. "I love your eyes," he said, kissing Alex's
cheeks just below them. "They're so beautiful. I used to stare at
your eyes when I thought you weren't looking."
"I know," Alex said, softly. He turned easily onto his side,
keeping Mulder's arms around him. "I want you," he said, "just like
this, always."
They rubbed up against each other, giving each other deep,
languid kisses, feeling the brush of skin against skin, the hardness of
nipples and cocks, the soft tickle of hair, the gentle slide of slick skin,
each movement catalogued for an eternity, and remembered and
passed on and re-experienced.
They moved easily towards the edge, eyes still open, hands
still moving against each other. "I need you," Alex breathed, and
Mulder groaned, feeling himself coming, and then watching his lover
come, their bodies thrusting together, moving scant millimeters
apart, staring into the deep green as they came and came and
collapsed together, alone, in love.
The opening of the hospital door woke Beth out of a light sleep.
"Don't tell me you've come for more blood," she groaned. "I don't
have any left to give." She blinked her eyes open, and stared at the
woman standing in front of her.
"I wanted to see how you were."
"I—I'm okay," Beth said. "I didn't think they let visitors in
yet."
"I told the nurse that I was your mother," Sarah said. "They
made an exception. I can leave, if you want—"
"No. Please, it's okay." She gestured to the chair beside the
bed. "Sit down."
There was awkward silence for a moment, then Sarah said,
"Fox is all right?"
Beth nodded. "Yeah. I guess Dana called you."
"Yes. She told me—about everything. I would have called him
myself, but I didn't know if he wanted to hear from me."
"I'm sure he does."
"Well," Sarah smiled, "it's early, still."
Beth nodded, and they lapsed into silence again.
"I shouldn't have come so early," Sarah apologized. "I didn't
intend to wake you, I just wanted to see for myself that you were all
right." She paused. "But you aren't, are you?"
Something broke in Beth's control. She started to cry. Her
mother perched on the edge of her bed, and took her daughter into
her arms.
"No," Beth agreed, letting the tears come. "I'm not."
Two
by Mona Ramsey
"She's awake now." The nurse came up to them in the waiting
room. "You can go in—only one of you at a time."
