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Sub-Urban Legends I

The Couch
by Gaby


Isn't it a beauty?"

Alex Krycek stood in the middle of the living room, staring at their newest acquisition—a huge white leather couch. His lover and fellow sub, Fox Mulder, rested his chin on Krycek's shoulder and wrapped one arm around the slim waist in front of him.

"Hmm-hmm," he mumbled. "Walter sure knows how to pick 'em."

Their Dom, Walter Skinner, was scheduled to return home the next day, after spending four days at a very boring conference on office management and leadership skills. As if Skinner needed any more skills in how to deal with recalcitrant agents, Mulder thought ruefully, remembering the days when he was still one of Skinner's agents, receiving some of the worst ass chewings in his life. Now he was a free-lance writer, sometimes contributing to psychology magazines, sometimes working on his first novel, but still, a few things never change. He was still Skinner's sub, if in an albeit slightly different way, and his ass was still on the line for some chewing as well on occasion. Mulder grinned.

"You know, I don't mind helping out and stuff. But I didn't sign on to be the 'little woman' who's stuck at home just so furniture can be delivered," Krycek groused. "That was certainly never part of the job description."

"Sounds to me that you need to go out and get yourself a real job, Alex. I mean, we've been feeding you and housing you for the longest time now," Mulder teased gently, kissing the other man's neck immediately to take away the sting his words had caused. Krycek turned around, obviously miffed because that was exactly how he felt—like someone who was paying for the privilege of staying in this household by being the perfect sub—and saw the arousal in those hazel eyes. He shook his head adamantly. Not only was that exactly the problem—his life seemed to revolve around nothing but sex—but their Dom had given his boys explicit orders: no fooling around while he was gone. Krycek had no intention of disobeying.

"It's been three days, Alex," Mulder wheedled, pressing his erection into the other man's groin. "Don't tell me you don't want to." He pushed his hips forward, and was rewarded by a helpless hiss coming from Krycek. "We could christen that couch. Haven't we christened every single room in this house since we bought it?"

"Well...yeah. But Walter was with us at the time!"

"We could still christen that couch with him once he's back. But come on, Alex...three days..." Mulder dove in, forcing his tongue between willing lips, licking and sucking, fighting for dominance. Heck, he was as subby as the next guy—who, in this case, happened to be a very subby Krycek—but a little domming didn't go amiss. He enjoyed those little fights for dominance with Krycek, and knew how they turned on the other man. He had calculated right— Krycek couldn't resist, and shoved his tongue down Mulder's throat in return, frantically grabbing a handful of chestnut hair, pressing and rubbing their groins together.

Mulder somehow maneuvered them over to the new couch, stumbling and twisting along the way, until they fell down on it, Mulder on top of Krycek, frantically trying to get the other man's jeans undone.

"We...we can't," Krycek gasped. "I'm not clean." Heck, he hated enemas to begin with but he had to admit they did make sex... less messy. Why should he take an enema while his Dom was out of town?

"Doesn't matter. Don't care," Mulder replied panting, pawing at the now open jeans but having no real luck tugging them off Krycek's long legs. Finally, he just grabbed the other man and turned him around so Krycek was lying on his stomach, in the middle of the white couch. His tanned skin looked even darker on the sofa, and Mulder actually stopped for a second to appreciate the view.

Snapping out of it, he fished two condoms out of the wooden box they kept on the end table, and opened one for his lover. "Here. That way you won't stain the new couch," Mulder explained, and Krycek grinned at him thankfully. The wide smile undid Mulder even more, so he just roughly grabbed the other man's hips to haul him into position, freed his cock, rolled on the condom, and with a minimum of lube and preparation, shoved himself inside the tight heat up to the hilt. His lover gave a desperate gasp before he dug his elbow into the sofa and pushed back with all his might. They both loved rough sex, and that was exactly what they indulged in, only careful not to mark the other person in any way so their Dom wouldn't be the wiser.

Once they had both come explosively, Mulder slumped forward, on top of his lover. They lay there, panting, desperately trying to catch their breath, immensely proud of themselves for having done something forbidden but not going to be found out, when Krycek suddenly felt something weird going on in his lower abdomen. "Fox?" he asked tentatively. "Fox, get up, I gotta go."

"Hmph?" Mulder merely snuggled closer, a dead weight on Krycek's back.

"Fox, I mean it. Get off me!" The younger man tried to push himself off the couch, but his one arm was trapped between his torso and the couch, and he hardly could get any leverage. "Move it, dammit," he finally all but yelled, and the desperation in his voice roused Mulder who then did push himself up, pulling his now flaccid cock out of Krycek with a soft plopping sound. The condom was stained, he realized with dismay, not paying too much attention to his lover who was desperately trying to get up but got tangled in his jeans which were still around his knees. Falling backwards to sit on the couch again, he couldn't control his bowels anymore, before he then made a desperate dash towards the downstairs bathroom, clenching his butt cheeks tightly.

When he came back into the living room, he saw Fox Mulder standing in front of the white couch, still dressed with just his dick hanging out of his open fly, his right hand still holding the stained condom in place, staring mournfully at the sofa in question. If it hadn't been such a grave situation they were in, the younger man probably would've laughed at the picture of total misery his lover provided. But Krycek already knew what he would find on the couch. Still, some kind of need made him go look anyway. Yup, just as he thought. And worse. Skinner was going to kill them. "Oh shit," he breathed with feeling.

Mulder just nodded, his eyes never leaving the brown stain. "I'll say," was all he said.

"So, what are we gonna do now?" Krycek asked frantically.

"Buy a new couch?"

"Don't be ridiculous! That thing was imported from Italy. It took months to get here. You don't seriously think they happen to have another one stashed away somewhere?"

"Well, maybe we're lucky?"

The quelling look Krycek gave his lover spoke volumes.

"Okay, okay," Mulder groused. "Okay, first things first. Let's clean this mess up."

"And how are we going to do that, Sherlock?"

"We'll just use a wet towel and scrub."

"This is a leather couch, idiot. You can't just use a wet towel on a leather couch!"

"Of course you can. I used to do it all the time with my couch."

"Yeah, that's how it looked like," Krycek muttered. "Look, this is a very new, very white couch which Walter loves very much. He will inspect every nook and cranny of that thing. He will see any and all stains on that thing. That includes water stains, Fox."

Mulder bit his lip. He hadn't thought of that. "Okay," he finally conceded. "You go ahead and clean up that mess, and I'll come up with an excuse."

Krycek gave the other man another quelling look, realizing he was once again reduced to housemaid while Mulder took care of the cerebral part, but went to get some cleaning equipment anyway.

The stain was all but gone, and Krycek had been careful enough not to let a water stain emerge. If you didn't know what to look for, you wouldn't see it. He was pretty damn proud of himself. He was not, however, too proud of his lover and his ideas.

"We'll go and buy a dog," Mulder finally exclaimed, running out of options.

"And we would be doing this because...?" Krycek raised an eyebrow while he went to stash away the cleaning equipment.

"The stain is the dog's fault. We still might get our asses blistered because we went out and bought the dog, or because we didn't watch him close enough when the 'accident' happened, but it shouldn't be as bad as being punished for...you know, what we really did. And anyway, Walter is forever talking about getting a dog, so we could say that we wanted to surprise him. A welcome home gift, so to speak."

Mulder watched his lover carefully for any kind of reaction. Krycek seemed to mull the whole idea over, realizing that—short of telling the truth—this was their best option. He finally nodded, causing Mulder to break out into a huge, relieved smile.

"What kind of dog?" Krycek asked.

Mulder's smile faded instantly. Damn. Good question. "Uh...I dunno...a German Shepard?"

Krycek frowned, and shook his head adamantly.

"St. Bernhard? Doberman? Greyhound? What???"

"Gotta be smaller. Much smaller."

"Poodle? Pekinese? Chihuahua?"

"Don't be ridiculous, Fox! Think of Walter! Can you imagine him walking around with a chihuahua on his leash?" They both grinned.

"Well, a bulldog would fit," Mulder argued, causing them to grin wider.

"Seriously though, when I said smaller, I was thinking a puppy. A pup that would turn into a big dog later on. But we don't need a grown dog now. First of all, only pups make messes. And second of all...think cuteness factor." Krycek raised a meaningful eyebrow.

Mulder immediately understood, and nodded enthusiastically. "Oh yeah! With huge puppy dog eyes. Walter will go all gooey on us!"

"Well, considering that your puppy dog eyes never make him so much as waver..." Krycek grinned.

"I don't have puppy dog eyes," Mulder replied, pouting.

"Yes, you do. But it doesn't matter right now. Come on, let's go buy a dog!"

They decided to drive to the animal shelter, thinking that they might find just the right dog there among all the different breeds, and realizing that the poor creatures there had had enough hardship in their lives already so at least one of them deserved a break.

Both Mulder and Krycek had had dogs as kids, and they actually looked forward to having another canine in their lives, now that the decision had been made. Skinner had always been a dog person but argued he wasn't home enough and it wasn't fair on the animal, though with both of his subs being home most of the time...

The men were saddened to see so many animals waiting for a new home, and their heart went out to each and every one of them. But they could only take home one, and when their eyes spotted the black bundle of scruffy fur, they both knew immediately that they had found their new best friend.

"What's his breed?" Krycek asked the shelter employee while he watched several dogs jumping against the fence of the cage they shared, and only the animal they wanted sitting calmly next to the door, looking at the strange men with sparkling, knowing eyes.

"We're not sure. There must be some Lab in there, and some Golden Retriever. But the fur's not soft enough for that, so there must be some other breeds in there as well."

"Dachshound, maybe?" Mulder chuckled.

The employee smiled politely at the joke, and wrestled the dogs until he managed to get the black one out of the cage without setting the others free as well. "He's obviously still a pup," he explained. "And he's gonna be a big dog once he's grown up. You said you've had previous experiences with dogs?"

Mulder nodded. "Lots," he agreed. "And we have a huge house in the suburbs, with a giant back yard. He'll have tons of fun frolicking around there. Won't you, boy?" he asked the dog that promptly barked in return.

It was obvious that the dog also approved of his new owners, so they were soon on their way home.

"Don't you think you went a little overboard?" Krycek looked at all the bags with dog toys, dog treats, dog shampoo, and what nots. He could understand that they had to buy a doggy bed and a leash, as well as some bowls and dog food, but in his usual exorbitant way, Mulder had outdone himself again.

"There's nothing good enough for Elvis," he informed his lover, grabbing a rubber bone and tossing it in the dog's direction. The pup, with his still too big paws, stumbled across the hallway, gliding over the marble floor and ending up with all fours stretched out. He gave an excited yelp before he scrambled back on his paws, and slithered after the toy, looking like a skater the first time on the ice.

"Elvis?" Krycek repeated, completely aghast. "You can't be serious!"

"Why the hell not? He ain't nothin' but a hounddog," Mulder intoned, with a little hip rotation the King would be proud of. "I think it fits perfectly. And he thinks so, too. Watch!" Mulder squatted down, and called the pup by name. They heard another excited yelp from somewhere in the house, and after a few seconds, a black whirlwind of animal came to a skidding halt in front of Mulder, expecting and receiving a hearty cuddle and some loving pats on the head.

Krycek couldn't help but grin. The pup was already bigger than the average poodle, but he still was mostly paws and big eyes, showing a certain eager clumsiness with every step he took, his long tail wagging constantly with excitement. Skinner would never stand a chance against that dog. He had to admit it; Mulder's idea was brilliant.

Just as they were beginning to settle in for a nice afternoon of watching talk shows which they would then take apart with sarcastic remarks, the phone rang. Mulder, feeling groovy and exhilarated, grabbed the receiver and purred, "Mulder's Mansion of Madness!"

The deep, rich laughter on the other end of the line told him his Dom was calling. "Fox! What would you have done if your publisher had called just now?" Skinner chuckled, a smile obvious in his voice.

"Ah, she knows I'm crazy," Mulder replied with a dismissive handwave. "So, what's up, Walter? Missing us? Want some cheesy phone sex with your pleasure slaves during lunch break?" He grinned when he saw Krycek's eyes light up, realizing who was calling.

"No, slave," Skinner purred in a deep, very sexy voice, causing Mulder's erection to stand at attention. "I was going to inform my harem boys that I'll be home sooner than we thought."

"Oh, you will be? That's great! Hey, Alex, Walter will be home sooner!" Krycek's smile turned into a big grin. Both subs were looking forward to seeing their Dom again. "When, Walter?" Mulder knew Skinner's flight back was scheduled for the next afternoon, and he tried to remember if there was another flight in the morning.

"Actually, in about half an hour or so. I'm at the airport." When silence was the only thing that greeted Skinner, he tentatively asked, "Fox? You still there?"

"Uh-huh."

"So anyway. I told everyone that it's a waste of time and Bureau resources to spend another day in San Diego when all we would be doing was have an expensive dinner tonight and a huge brunch tomorrow morning, as the conference itself had already ended around noon. So, I bid farewell and took the same flight I was scheduled on, only a day early."

"Uh-huh."

"Fox, are you okay?"

"Uh-huh."

"Let me talk to Alex."

There was some bustling, then Krycek's tentative voice came over the line. "Hi, Walter."

"Alex, my sexy boy, are you two all right?"

Silence, then, "Uh-huh."

"What did you do?"

"Whaddya mean?"

"Well, seems to me you boys have been naughty. Fox never shuts up except when he's feeling guilty. So, what gives?"

Krycek gave his fellow sub a dirty look for being so obvious, then turned his attention back to Skinner. "Nothing's wrong, Walter, I promise. Guess we're just a bit overwhelmed you're coming home early, that's all."

Skinner laughed. "Ah, I see. Indulged yourself in some late night video session, and the house is still in shambles, huh? Okay, tell you what. I'll drive slowly, so you have enough time to tidy up the place. Good? Okay. Be there in an hour. Missed you." And he hung up the phone.

Krycek stared at the receiver for another long moment before he turned to Mulder. "We have one hour. We gotta get our story straight and prepare the couch."

Mulder nodded, frantically looking around the living room for their most important 'prop.' Finally realizing that it was nowhere to be found, he just gave a blood-curling yell, "Eeeel-vissss!"

Less than an hour later, they heard the car door slam shut, and rushed to get into their respective positions. Krycek kneeling in front of the couch, scrubbing frantically at the already almost invisible stain, while Mulder was readily striking a pose of stern master who scolds a bad puppy. It broke Krycek's heart to scold an innocent Elvis who was sitting next to him, tail wagging happily, watching his new master rub a towel all over the big white thing that looked very comfy indeed.

Skinner opened the front door to hear Mulder busily telling someone off, repeatedly saying something about "naughty pup" and "look what you did." At first, the balding man thought his subs were acting, engaging in some role play as a home coming gift for their master, until he saw that the "naughty pup" was...a pup.

Elvis, who had started to whimper when one of his new masters began to scold him, was happy to see someone new coming into his new home. He had no idea who that man was, and he looked just as stern as the man who had bought him all the fun stuff to play with. At least the newcomer also wore a slightly confused look on his face, so he decided to take his chances with that man. Scampering towards Skinner, yapping happily, Elvis greeted his newest master.

"What is going on here?" Skinner thundered, taking in one sub scrubbing his beloved new couch, his other sub scolding a pup, and a pup that hadn't been part of the household when he left only a few days earlier. Elvis flinched when he heard the newest master yell like that, and he stopped a few feet away from the man, not so sure anymore about greeting him.

The big man stared at the dog, saw the huge puppy dog eyes in what could only be described as an impish face with fur that stood on end and looked like Mulder with a bad case of bedhair. He squatted down, and held out one hand. "Well, who are you?" he crooned at the dog, a smile tugging at his lips. That dog definitely had a certain something, and Skinner felt his bad mood wither and die away.

Elvis cocked his head, trying to decide whether or not to trust the newcomer, before he bravely walked closer. It's always good to know your friends, and even more so, your enemies, so in case that stranger decided to be mean to his two masters... He came to a halt in front of Skinner and sniffed his hand. When Skinner started to scratch his head just so, Elvis decided that, enemy or not, that man was not going to leave his house!

"That's Elvis, Walter," Mulder explained. "We wanted to surprise you with him. I mean, you've been talking about getting a dog for the longest time, so we went to the animal shelter, and when we saw him there, we just couldn't resist..."

"Fox named him. I still say we should come up with something better," Krycek muttered.

"Like what? Rover? Spot? Rex? Sparky?" Mulder argued. "No. He likes Elvis. Watch, Walter!" Mulder squatted down and called the pup that immediately reacted and trotted towards him. After receiving the obligatory pat on the head, he ran back towards Skinner. That man was just a natural when it came to scratching a pup's head behind the ears.

"Well, I guess Elvis it is, then, huh?" Skinner crooned at the pup with a silly grin on his face. "Yes, you're a real cutie, aren't you?"

Mulder gave Krycek a knowing smile and mouthed, "Putty in our hands."

His fellow sub grinned in reply before he turned his attention to Skinner. "I'm really very sorry about the mess though, Walter," he said mournfully. "We didn't watch Elvis and...well, it just happened. I managed to get most of it out but I think there's gonna be a stain..."

Skinner stood up and walked over to the couch to take a closer look. A really close look. He even squinted. "Well, if you don't know what to look for," he mumbled before he turned to the dog. "No pups allowed on my furniture, Elvis, remember that in future," he lectured sternly. The pup whimpered mournfully, slightly confused why everyone was suddenly on his case.

"We've already punished him. Rolled up paper and all. I'm really sorry, Walter. You can punish us for not being more careful," Mulder mumbled, his eyes downcast, the picture of a miserable sub.

Skinner sighed.

"Oh, shut up, you. Come here, boys!" He opened his arms, and his subs happily fell into the waiting embrace, giving and receiving hot and demanding welcome home kisses. "And thank you for Elvis. I already adore the little fella," Skinner added, looking down at the pup fondly. "And now I'll go and unpack my things while you boys take care of dinner!" Both Krycek and Mulder scrambled to do their Dom's bidding.

***

They all sat in the kitchen eating a take-out dinner while laughing at the stories Skinner told about the conference when they suddenly heard a whimper as well as scratching noises. The big man stood up, urging his subs to stay seated and finish their meal. Mulder and Krycek shared a look, pretty damned proud of themselves for having gotten off so easily, yet also feeling slightly guilty for the little white lie they had told. But, all things considered, things were looking good. Skinner wasn't inclined on punishing them, and considering the fact that they hadn't been together for several days, the night was promising to be long and hot and exciting and exhausting. And, if they were really lucky, the next day, Saturday, promised to be a day full of erotic, arousing, sexy role plays that might even extend into Sunday. Life was good.

Until they heard the angry bellow coming from the living room.

Running to their Dom at full speed, Mulder and Krycek frantically tried to come up with a reason why he might suddenly be so angry with them. When they saw Elvis sitting in front of the patio door, whining and scratching the glass, wanting to be let outside, they both realized that the pup was obviously already house trained. They hadn't talked about that with the shelter's employee. Damn. Double damn!

"Care to elaborate?" Skinner asked in a deceptively mild tone while he opened the patio door and allowed Elvis to run outside. "Seems a bit strange that the dog would leave a mess on my new couch when he's obviously trained to go outside, wouldn't you say?"

His subs stuttered for a long moment before Krycek decided the best idea was to just come clean, so he told his Dom the truth, with Mulder chiming in when necessary. They were both blushing a furious red, deeply ashamed at being caught as well as having disobeyed and then lied to their lover in the first place.

Skinner listened to his subs without showing so much as one emotion, and then nodded. "Fine," he finally said, nodding to himself as if coming to a decision. "Seems to me that I now have one cute little pup and two naughty hounddogs that need some correction. Both of you, upstairs, get yourself ready, and then report back to me here. Now!" Skinner gave both subs a hearty swat on their jeans-clad bottoms, sending them to their respective showers and enemas.

When Mulder and Krycek came back into the living room half an hour later, Skinner—now in full Dom mode once again—stood waiting for his naked subs, toys in hand. He silently pointed at the floor in front of himself, and his boys immediately obeyed, kneeling at his feet. They felt badly for what they had done, they knew they deserved to be punished, but they were a little confused by the toys they saw...and the ones they didn't see. There weren't any paddles, or straps, or even canes in the living room. Skinner merely held two collars with leashes in his hands, the oxblood red one for Mulder and the rich green one for Krycek.

Skinner buckled both around his subs' necks, making sure they were snugly against the skin, before he informed them of his plans. "Since you made a mess like all puppies are wont to do, I've decided to treat you like pups for the weekend. That also means you're not able to speak, boys. Whimpering, barking, whining is okay. But I will not hear any words coming out of your mouths, is that understood?" He stared at his chagrined subs who merely nodded miserably. "That also means you'll be walking on all fours. Alex, I will make certain allowances if need be," the Dom added softly, looking at Krycek's left arm. His sub nodded. It wasn't the first time they played puppy games, though up till now it had been just that—games. This was punishment. He knew that he had a hard time crawling upstairs with only one hand to steady himself, and he was naturally slower than Mulder when they were walking around on hands and knees.

"Since you've already eaten your dinner, you'll be happy to know that you won't have to eat out of your dog dishes tonight," Skinner went on, causing his subs to make faces. They weren't overly fond of that particular part. "If I should feel generous, I might allow you to drink out of a glass or soda can with a straw, but other than that it's water out of the bowl, boys," he continued, tugging at their leashes to ram the point home that they were puppies for now.

At that moment, Elvis came running into the room, watching his new masters play a game he thought was quite funny. Not wanting to be left out, he wiggled his way in between the two kneeling men and sat back on his haunches, looking up at Skinner expectantly. The Dom had a hard time keeping his face and voice stern when he saw his three puppies lined up like that, and he couldn't prevent the ends of his lips curling up in a slight smile.

"Okay, time to veg out in front of the TV on my new couch," Skinner announced, tugging at the leashes and forcing his subs to crawl after him. He positioned them on either side of his long legs once he had settled down, and grinned when he saw the way Mulder looked wistfully at the comfortable couch. "I've already told you, no pups allowed on my furniture."

Skinner grabbed a Lone Gunmen magazine, rolled it up, and ordered his human pups to raise their butts. Then he proceeded to spank them at a leisurely pace with the magazine while he watched TV. It didn't hurt, really, and the bottoms only slightly pinked up, but both Mulder and Krycek felt thoroughly chagrined by that action.

Elvis watched the proceedings, utterly confused, but decided that no matter how many silly games his three new masters liked to play, he loved his new home and he wouldn't want to leave. He jumped on the sofa and walked up to the balding man, the one who most obviously was the master of all masters, and was enveloped in a crushing hug.

"I thought no pups were allowed on the furniture," Mulder groused under his breath, only to receive a couple of very stinging spanks with Skinner's big, hard hand as punishment for speaking. The sub yelped in reply, sounding quite like a puppy.

"Elvis isn't on the furniture, he's on my lap," Skinner informed his subs, settling the dog on his broad thighs. "And since I'm the master, I can do whatever I want."

Neither Mulder nor Krycek had any snappy remark for that.

The evening was spent in front of the television, with Elvis receiving all the cuddles and attention the subs had hoped would be bestowed upon them, while they were glumly sitting on the floor, leashes held so tightly by Skinner that they couldn't even lie down comfortably.

Krycek had haltingly dared to lean against his Dom's strong legs, not entirely sure that this was allowed, but realizing with a happy sigh that the big man obviously enjoyed this kind of show of affection. Skinner was carding his fingers through Krycek's soft hair, massaging the scalp gently, and murmuring soft nothings. The sub decided that things weren't really as bad as he at first had thought—until he witnessed Mulder's predicament.

Mulder had realized quite a while earlier that the beer that he had been drinking during dinner was making itself felt, but he tried to ignore it. At some point, he just couldn't hold it in anymore though, so he nudged Skinner with his head and pointed in the direction of the small guest bathroom down the hall. Skinner feigned ignorance.

"What is it, Fox?" he asked innocently, looking where his sub pointed, and quite obviously knowing what the man wanted. Mulder pointed again, this time more forcefully. Skinner shrugged his shoulders again. "What, pup?" They began a staring contest, Mulder willing Skinner to give in, Skinner trying to force Mulder into doing something that would be humiliating and therefore another perfect punishment for disobeying his Dom.

Finally, realizing that he had absolutely no chance of winning, Mulder hung his head and raised his right leg. "Ah," Skinner exclaimed. "You need to relieve yourself!" Mulder gave his Dom a murdering look which Skinner happily ignored. "Why didn't you say so?" the bigger man asked with a broad smile on his face before he deposited Elvis on the floor and stood up. "Come on, pup." He tugged on Mulder's leash, looking over his shoulder at Krycek. "What about you, Alex? Gotta go as well?" When Krycek shook his head, Skinner added, "Okay, but stay right where you are, you hear? Stay!" He pointed a stern finger at his sub, and the growled order even forced Elvis to immediately sit down on his haunches.

Mulder crawled in the direction of the bathroom, thinking that they really should've just told Skinner the truth. Even if that stupid Elvis had not been house broken, he was still sure that the Dom would have somehow found out about their disobedience. It had been stupid and silly of them to think otherwise. Now they paid the price. A smarting behind wasn't half as bad as this humiliating puppy play, though he had to admit that it did drive the point home quite nicely. Still, a punishment spanking would've been the better choice. Mulder sighed forlornly. Too late for that now.

Then he suddenly choked. Skinner was forcefully tugging on the leash. Mulder turned around and looked at the Dom, realizing with a shock that Skinner was walking towards the patio door.

Oh, no.

No way in hell.

Mulder gave a pathetic little whimper, shaking his head adamantly. Skinner just nodded his head just as adamantly, and opened the sliding glass door meaningfully. "I thought you needed to go, Fox," he said calmly. "It's either this or nothing at all. And you'd better not make any messes on my carpet, pup."

Mulder exchanged a helpless look with Krycek who sat next to the couch with a panicked look on this face, watching the scene unfold in front of him. Another pleading look in Skinner's direction didn't help either. It was obvious that the Dom meant business.

Resigning himself to his fate, Mulder slowly made his way into the backyard and crawled to the nearest bushes. At least their house didn't have any immediate neighbors—one of the reasons why they had bought it in the first place. That way they could indulge in some hot sex games in the swimming pool, or on the grass, or hanging upside down from the big oak tree if they so desired. Now Mulder cursed the fact that there weren't any neighbors that might keep Skinner from playing this particular humiliating game. He sighed.

"You may use your hands, Fox," Skinner told his sub softly when he saw Mulder stopping in front of the nearest bush. The younger man looked gratefully at his Dom, and knelt up, grabbing his cock to direct the stream of urine into the bush. After shaking himself off, he went back on all fours and buried his face in Skinner's knee as a show of contrition. He had learnt his lesson. He didn't want to be punished anymore. "Good pup," Skinner praised softly, ruffling Mulder's hair affectionately. "Come on, let's get you back inside." He grabbed the leash and led his sub into the warm living room where Krycek watched them with undisguised horror, and Elvis happily jumped up and down, hardly able to wait until Skinner was seated so he could curl up on his lap again.

The night was spent on the hard master bedroom floor, with only a blanket to sleep on, their leashes tied to a respective foot of the big bed all three men usually shared. It was a warm summer night, so neither sub grew cold even though they were naked and didn't have any covers. Still, what kept them mostly awake was the fact that they were being punished this way. They still didn't dare talk to each other, even after Skinner fell asleep, because they knew from experience that this man just had some kind of sixth sense when it came to his subs. But the looks Mulder and Krycek shared spoke volumes. They both would have preferred the beating of their lives as punishment instead of the less painful yet more humiliating punishment Skinner was dishing out right now.

Elvis didn't seem to mind. He happily curled up between his two human puppy friends and slept the sleep of the innocent.

The next morning meant another turn in the backyard, for both of them, and eating breakfast out of bowls. Skinner quite obviously had decided to teach his subs a lesson, and he made sure they would learn it once and for all. Mulder and Krycek felt horrible, now less for themselves but for Skinner, for the way they had treated him by disobeying and trying to cover it up. Most of all, though, they realized that Skinner had immediately fallen in love with Elvis, thinking that his boys had wanted to share some joy with him by giving him something he had pined for for a long time, and then having to find out that the pup was only a way of covering up their misdeed.

Mulder and Krycek spent Saturday morning tied to the coffee table, watching Skinner trying to teach Elvis some basic tricks. The pup was smart, and learning fast. He enjoyed that kind of game, where his master-master told him to sit and then pushed on his bottom. Or when his master-master threw the rubber bone and told him to fetch. He was a little confused that his sub-masters, as he had decided to call them, weren't allowed to participate because he was sure they would enjoy a good game of fetch as well, but then again, master-master knew them longer than he did, so he probably knew best.

Judging from the forlorn looks on his sub-masters' faces though, Elvis wasn't entirely sure that they were all too happy just watching him play with their master-master, so he made sure to run over and lick their faces every once in a while, trying to make them understand that he'd love to spend more time with them but that he was just too busy playing with their master-master.

Finally, Krycek had enough, and he decided to be daring. "Sir?" he asked tentatively, looking at Skinner through his long eyelashes, trying to gauge the big man's attitude.

Skinner turned around with a stern look on his face, ready to scold his sub for his disobedience. When he saw the dejected faces though, he decided to hear Krycek out first.

"We are really sorry, Sir," Krycek began hesitantly, watching Mulder nod enthusiastically. "What we did was wrong. We shouldn't have disobeyed you. And we shouldn't have lied to you."

"And we're sorry about using Elvis like that. We knew you'd go all gooey over him, but we really did want to give him to you to make you happy. Not just to save our asses," Mulder added, shame-faced.

Skinner merely watched his boys in silence. Finally, he nodded and walked over to them. "You know, it wasn't so much that you disobeyed me by having sex while I was gone. Or that you lied to me so blatantly—and really, did you seriously think I'd believe that cock and bull story of yours? That this pup was responsible for the mess? I kept waiting for you to 'fess up, and you didn't. I bet you never would've said anything if Elvis hadn't blown your cover by showing he has better manners than you do."

Mulder and Krycek flinched at that, and hung their heads even lower.

"I don't care about the couch, boys. I don't care about you being naughty and not being able to keep your hands off each other." At his subs' surprised looks, Skinner smiled a little and conceded, "Okay, so I care a little." Then he grew serious again. "But what I do care about is the issue of trust. You boys obviously didn't trust me enough to tell me the truth. You played with my feelings when you lied to me and brought Elvis into our home. You showed me that you don't value what we have here, and that is what hurt the most."

Both Mulder and Krycek stared at their Dom in shock. They had no clue Skinner had interpreted their silly white lie this way.

"God, Walter, we're so sorry!" Mulder exclaimed, forgetting his place as proper sub for a moment, too focused on making his lover see that he was wrong. "Everything we did was because we wanted to save our asses! We never wanted to hurt your feelings that way! And there's nothing I value more in my entire life than what we have between us. I swear!"

Krycek, who had been silently kneeling next to his fellow sub, nodded, wiping a few stray tears away. "Please believe me that living with you two is the best thing that ever happened to me. You make me feel safe, Sir. You keep me grounded." He angrily wiped more tears off his face but kept his eyes locked on Skinner. "I'm sorry I disappointed you so much. That was never my intention. Please, don't take away what we have here..."

Skinner frowned, momentarily confused by what his sub was talking about. Then he realized Krycek was scared he would call off their relationship. Shaking his head, he squatted down in front of his subs, staring at them intently. "Listen to me, Alex," he said with grave seriousness. "You two are my subs. 24/7. Forever. We agreed on that a while ago, and our decision is binding. Forever. We might act like equals some of the time, but never forget that you still are my subs, no matter what. When you screw up, you get punished. Then life goes on. I know how much this arrangement means to you, and I would never, ever call it off. It is too important to me, too. That's why I was so hurt when I saw how easily you two were able and willing to manipulate me, even though I can now understand that you didn't mean it that way."

Both his boys gave a sigh of relief.

"However, when I say you two need to be punished, then this is what's going to happen. You have no say in this matter, since you forfeited this privilege when we officially consumated our arrangement. No safe words. You trust me enough to know if and when and how to punish you if need be. That's what we're about, right?" Mulder and Krycek nodded, glad that Skinner said out loud what they felt. "Good. The fact that you tried to manipulate me into not punishing you means that I need to get a bit creative in my punishments."

Skinner turned his attention to Krycek again. "The fact that I haven't blistered your butt yet doesn't mean you're not being punished, Alex. Punishment isn't always about pain, baby. Punishment should fit the crime. You have to admit that you'd've preferred a good hide tanning to being treated like pups since yesterday, right?" Two dark heads nodded emphatically. Skinner grinned. "Good. That means my plan worked." He stood up, stretching his long frame and feeling some joints pop.

His subs stared at one another, realizing what had happened. Heck, yes, they would've gladly begged for a strapping instead of having to go into the backyard to relieve themselves. Normally, they loved role play, and being Skinner's puppies had been lots of fun in the past. Having to eat out of a bowl and then being patted on the head lovingly had given them the feeling of being cherished. Curling up next to the big man's legs and having one's belly tickled had shown how much Skinner loved them...but none of these things had happened during the last 24 hours, and both Krycek and Mulder had felt miserable. Well and truly punished.

"I'm sorry," they mumbled as one, heads hanging lower than ever. No matter what Skinner would decide as their next punishment, they would accept it without hesitation. It was the least they could do, all things considered. They would be the bestest puppies in the whole wide world, if that's what Skinner wanted. Anything, as long as they were able to prove to their Dom how much he meant to them, as Dom and as lover.

"Okay," Skinner finally growled with a husky voice, startling his subs out of their reverie. "I think I'm in the mood for some bestiality right now..."

Both Mulder and Krycek stared at Elvis who was happily licking his balls a few feet away, oblivious to what was going on. They seemed to have a quick telepathic discussion on who would save their beloved Elvis, but before Mulder could open his mouth and tell Skinner that there were limits they weren't willing to cross, Skinner guffawed and pointed at the couch. "Up, pups," he instructed his subs. "Alex, on your back, Fox, on all fours, in the 69 position."

His subs grinned, relieved that Elvis was safe, and happy that they were obviously forgiven, and they scrambled to obey. Krycek lay down, and Mulder knelt over him, ass enticingly in the air at the perfect height to be breached by Skinner's thick shaft. Krycek licked his lips when he watched Mulder's cock dangling a few inches away from his face, and demandingly raised his own hips in invitation.

Skinner chuckled, watching his two beautiful boys in the beginning throes of passion, and grabbed the lube and a condom from the wooden box on the end table. Then he prepared Mulder, driving him slowly and purposefully insane with his knowing fingers.

"Okay, boys, listen to me. You can come whenever you're ready, but don't you dare spill a drop. I don't want any stains on my new couch, is that understood?"

Krycek had the insane urge to giggle hysterically but decided to swallow Mulder's cock in one go instead. His fellow sub gave a desperate gasp before he dove into Krycek's groin to torment the other man's balls.

Mulder had a better leverage with his two arms than Krycek would have had with only one, so they usually ended up in that position when they engaged in this particular sex game, and Mulder wasn't one to complain, because he did not only get the living daylights sucked out of his dick, but he also got fucked within an inch of his life by Skinner who was shoving his cock into his sub's tight ass with a brutal thrust of his hips.

The coupling was fast and desperate. All three men were trying to get the others off as soon as possible, engaging in a race to climax that in the end was won by Krycek who brought Mulder over the edge with a lethal combination of deep throating and ball squeezing. Mulder, who needed both hands to keep himself propped up, had the disadvantage of only being able to use his mouth, but knew how to use his tongue to the best of his advantage, so he coaxed an orgasm out of his fellow sub mere seconds after his own, simultaneous with Skinner's climax which was forced out of him when Mulder's ass clamped down on his throbbing shaft. The Dom gave a hoarse yell before slumping forward, forcing Mulder to hold them both up in order to not crush Krycek.

All three men panted heavily for another minute or so, before Skinner ordered Krycek to move away slightly and sit down on the couch. Once Mulder had nobody to watch out for, he crumbled down, sprawling over the rest of the sofa in a vain attempt to catch his breath.

"Up, pup," Skinner panted, tugging on Mulder's leash. "No pups on my furniture."

Mulder gave his Dom a murdering look, while Krycek just looked confused. Hadn't Skinner just ordered him to sit down on the couch? He kept silent, trying to be unobtrusive, and watched Mulder slowly getting to his feet.

Skinner smiled at the obviously exhausted sub in front of him and unclipped the leash from the collar which he left on, for no other reason than the fact that the oxblood red leather looked sexy as hell on Mulder. Then he went over to Krycek and did the same, also taking an appreciating look at the dark green of his other sub's leather collar.

"Okay, boys, come here," the big man mumbled, lying down on the couch and opening his arms invitingly. Krycek immediately scrambled over his Dom's strong legs and cuddled in between the man and the back of the couch while Mulder took the other side, being held closely by a strong arm. The couch was wide and comfortable but still too narrow for three men at once, so both subs ended up lying on top of their Dom, snuggling close and sighing contentedly. "As I said before, no pups on the furniture, but my lap is fine," Skinner smiled.

"We're really sorry about what happened," Krycek muttered into a hairy chest, receiving a sharp slap on the naked butt in reply. Mulder received one as well, just for the heck of it.

"I told you it's okay. We've talked it over, and we've agreed to move on. Stop apologizing, or I'll punish you some more." Skinner grinned evilly. "And you won't like it," he added, chuckling with a devilish gleam.

Krycek groaned, and buried his face into his Dom's neck. "I'd apologize for apologizing, but I guess I'd better not," he mumbled, causing Skinner to laugh out loud and almost dislodge his subs from their perch on top of him.

"Shut up, Alex, or do want our dog days to never be over?" Mulder groused, causing Skinner to laugh out even louder. His subs held on for dear life, and snuggled closer until all three were safely tugged together once again.

They were just about to slip into some well-deserved midday nap when their carefully built human pyramid was jostled by a loudly barking black whirlwind that jumped on top of them, tail wagging happily and hitting the subs' butts in the process. Krycek and Mulder muttered under their breath and tried to dislodge Elvis from his position on top of their backs, or at least tried to get him to stop wagging his tail, until Skinner managed to raise his head enough to see what the problem was about.

When he realized that Elvis was hitting his subs with his tail, he burst out in a hysterical laughing fit that did cause all three men and the pup to fall off the couch. Krycek and Mulder stared morosely at the big man, asking themselves what in hell could be so funny.

Only after several minutes of catching his breath, Skinner was finally able to explain what he found so funny. "You boys go out to buy me a dog I've wanted for the longest time though we never talked about what kind of dog. And out of those dozens, maybe hundreds of dogs in the shelter, you chose the one that fits perfectly to me. Because he obviously enjoys spanking your butts as much as I do!"

Skinner hugged Elvis close to his chest and laughed even louder.

xx

gaby@gaby.slashcity.tv

Title: Sub-Urban Legends I—The Couch
Author: Gaby
Fandom: X Files
Pairing: M/K/Sk
Rating: NC-17
Archive: DitB, RatB and BIC—yes Slashing Mulder, Skinks, SKSA, Mulder in Jeopardy—archivists, please use the following direct link http://gaby.slashcity.tv/legends/legends01.html instead of archiving the story as text...I'm weird that way—thank you! :)
Feedback: Why, yes, please, as long as it's friendly! gaby@gaby.slashcity.tv
Series/Sequel: I'm still fighting temptation but I think my muses are seriously ganging up on me so...[dejected sigh]...yes, I guess I now have yet another series to take care of...
My home is at http://gaby.slashcity.tv/
Disclaimers: Mulder, Krycek, and Skinner belong to someone else, or so TPTB claim. Elvis is mine, though! [g]
Beta by the ever-wonderful Josan...big bear hugs, my dear! (and yes, I'm sure I'll manage to write a story without the Pouty One one of these days...[g])
Notes: This is a very late birthday pressie for Ursula! Look, Urs, I squeezed in a doggy, just for you! [g] Thanks for sending me all the tapes, and for entertaining me with your wonderful stories! :)
Additional notes: It's all Ursula's fault. [g] No, really! I mean, here I was, honestly thinking I'd never write again what with my muses gone on permanent vacation (or so it seemed) and up comes Ursula with that Urban Legends challenge. Bad Ursula! [bg] For those of you who don't know, go take a look here http://www.snopes2.com/ and have a good laugh at someone else's expanse. I sure did. Heh. Anyway, my muses went wild when they saw some of the legends I found there, so I guess there will be more stories set in this universe. Sigh. I repeat: Bad Ursula!!! [g]
Last notes, I promise: More of a warning, really...this story deals with a D/s relationship, so be prepared for the following: mind games, humiliation, sex toys, kinky sex games, hot threesome sex, some toilet humor, a teary-eyed Rat, a pouting Fox, a hurting Surly One (don't worry, the boys comfort him [g]), quite a bit o' angst (and I really tried for a funny snippet! Sigh!), ugly furniture...oh, and did I mention bestiality? [seraphic smile]
Summary: Go read the last notes, people! [g] Based on this urban legend: http://www.snopes.com/sex/kinky/sofa.htm

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