<FWMldr> Excuse me?
<HandyMan> All work and no play makes Spooky a dull boy, you know.
<FWMldr> Do I know you?
<HandyMan> Well, certainly not in the Biblical sense, but yeah, you know me.
<FWMldr> Langley?
<HandyMan> Nope. I have much better hair.
<FWMldr> Skinner?
<HandyMan> Such wit! You do need to get out more.
<FWMldr> Okay, I'll bite. Who is this?
<HandyMan> And you're famed for your remarkable intuition and spooky
knowledge? I'm disappointed.
<FWMldr> Well, I'm not known for being a fucking psychic, so either you tell
me who this is or I sign off.
<FWMldr> Besides, there's only one person I can think of and he wouldn't be
harassing me online.
<HandyMan> Tsk, tsk. Such language. Well, I'm bigger than a breadbox,
smaller than an alien bounty hunter.
<HandyMan> What, you don't think I have the requisite computer skills? I'm
hurt.
<FWMldr> What do you want?
<HandyMan> Well, you still haven't positively identified me.
<FWMldr> I know who you are, you bastard. Wait, why the hell am I still
talking to you? Go play your games somewhere else.
<HandyMan> Um, because you have no life, and chatting with me is the most
interesting thing you could possibly do right now?
<FWMldr> Fine, Mr. Social Life....why the hell are you online on a Friday
night? Did your date cancel?
<HandyMan> Nah, too busy to date right now.
<FWMldr> Of course. How long did it take you to come up with that excuse?
<HandyMan> Hey, no one appreciates how much fighting for world domination,
not to mention betraying people left and right, cuts into your social life.
<FWMldr> I'll ask one more time. What do you want?
<HandyMan> Well, that world domination thing, another Swiss bank account, a
decent blow job. What do you want Fox?
<FWMldr> Krycek, I really don't care about your personal life. Do you have
more information for me or is this just the way you waste your valuable time?
<HandyMan> Oh, don't worry, I'm not wasting time. I've time to kill while I
wait for this encryption program to do it's magic.
<FWMldr> What are you talking about?
<HandyMan> Nothing you need to worry about. I cracked the FBI database ages
ago.
<FWMldr> Okay, Krycek, as much as this has been a blast, I'm going to have to
say goodbye.
<HandyMan> Such a slut for information. Okay, here's some. Aliens are
trying to take over the world, and you shouldn't trust that chain-smoking
bastard. Happy? Can we chat some more now?
<FWMldr> Are you drunk?
<HandyMan> Nah, it's a weak habit. I'm high on life.
<FWMldr> Then why do you want to chat with me? More importantly, what makes
you think I'd want to chat with you?
<HandyMan> I'm bored, this little project of mine is taking longer than I
thought, and if nothing else, you're always amusing. And you shouldn't
discount my charming wit or obvious sex appeal.
<FWMldr> Hah! Okay, you're barking up the wrong tree, Krycek. They have
chat rooms for what you're looking for...and quite a few websites, if the
rumors are true...
<HandyMan> Methinks you do protest to much. But can you give me the urls
anyway?
<FWMldr> You're a smart guy. Do a search.
<HandyMan> I'd love to know what you think is worthy of recommendation
though. You being a connoisseur of such things...
<FWMldr> Well...what are you into?
<HandyMan> Stubborn FBI agents with animal names and pouty lower lips.
<FWMldr> Try www.inyourdreams.com Come on, Krycek...even you can't think
that would work.
<HandyMan> Ha. Your wit slays me. And, as I've told you before, I do
believe in extreme possibilities.
<FWMldr> Well, good, because that would have to be the most extreme thing
you've ever believed in.
<HandyMan> You know, I don't think so. I know how you look at me, you can't
say the thought's never crossed your mind. And, I could point out a few hard
truths about sexual desire masqueraded as violent impulse. But that would be
too obvious.
<FWMldr> LOL Wow, Krycek...so you've taken some psych classes at the local
community college. Good for you!
<FWMldr> Not to say you're right, of course....but nice try.
<HandyMan> Well, if you can't bear to think I'm your intellectual equal, I
could care less. But my educational background was at least true.
<FWMldr> Krycek, I know how intelligent you are....that's why I don't
understand what you think you're doing. Your kiss notwithstanding, I think
you'd be hard pressed to seduce me...especially online. So, what else are
you up to?
<HandyMan> I told you —I'm hacking into a database you're best not knowing
about. And I'm bored. And horny. No need to change the subject.
<FWMldr> Was I changing the subject? I'm sorry. So, you're horny and you
thought the best way to relieve this would be to somehow convince me to cyber
with you? I have to admire your confidence.
<HandyMan> Confident? Rash? It's a fine line. Indulge me.
<FWMldr> I don't think so. Don't worry, blue balls never killed anyone.
<HandyMan> Well, I'm already working on that —multi-tasking, you know —
but some additional stimulation from you would be nice.
<FWMldr> Okay....how about thinking about Scully in a teddy? Does that do
anything for you?
<HandyMan> Hmmm. Has potential, but I think I'll save it for another time.
<FWMldr> Really? You'd go for Scully?
<HandyMan> Who wouldn't?
<FWMldr> Well, I wouldn't but that's just because I can't see her that way.
<HandyMan> Your loss. But back to you. I can't stop thinking about your
mouth tonight. Sometimes it's your hands, other times, that skimpy Speedo,
but it's definitely your mouth tonight.
<FWMldr> Oh really? What's so special about my mouth?
<HandyMan> Fishing, are you? Okay, it's shape —especially that lower lip.
When you're nervous you lick it, I used to imagine the moisture was my
precum, staining it right before I filled you with my cock, sliding down your
throat, holding you by the hair and fucking you hard.
<FWMldr> okay...that's a visual...
<HandyMan> Here's another... I'm stroking my cock right now, it's aching
it's so hard. I'm circling my palm over the tip, spreading the moisture,
pretending it's your mouth wetting it, licking it. When I close my eyes I
can see you kneeling in front of me.
<FWMldr> Krycek...I'm not going to do this....
<HandyMan> Stop thinking so much. Go with it. You're on your knees, your
mouth almost where I want it, but you're teasing me, long slow swipes of your
tongue, glancing kisses, your fingers ghosting over my balls, the crack of my
ass...
<HandyMan> Tag, Mulder, you're it.
<FWMldr> Tell me, Krycek, how many nights have you jerked off while
fantasizing about me? I'd be flattered if you weren't such a scum-sucking
son of a bitch.
<HandyMan> Quite a few, really. I'd say you were in my top ten.
<FWMldr> Is that so? That's pretty sad, really. Can't get any real life
people to pay you any attention?
<HandyMan> One night stands do get stale. I'm sure you can appreciate that
my line of work doesn't exactly lend itself to attachments. What's your
excuse?
<FWMldr> I have no interest in forming attachments. They'll just leave me,
anyway. At least my right hand is permanently attached.
<HandyMan> Yes, yes, everyone you love leaves or betrays you, I know the
drill. But you being needy and self-pitying doesn't really work with the
fantasy I've got going.
<FWMldr> It doesn't? You mean, the idea of me being completely vulnerable
and trusting never fits into your fantasies?
<HandyMan> No, I'll leave that kink to the pirhanas you call girlfriends and
partners.
<FWMldr> Careful, you sound jealous
<HandyMan> Nah, just realistic —stating the facts, you know. So, why are
you still talking to me? I mean considering your frequently expressed lack of
interest? I'd hazard a guess, but being the uneducated thug I am, I'm sure
I'd be wrong.
<FWMldr> no, please. go right ahead.
<HandyMan> I'd much rather you enlightened me with your delightful, Oxford
education. Besides, I'm curious about why you think you haven't logged off
yet.
<FWMldr> Well, like you said, I have nothing better to do on a Friday night.
It's either be amused by you or look up information on the flesh-eating
virus. You're slightly less nauseating, so here I am.
<HandyMan> You sweet flatterer, you.
<FWMldr> I'm known for my charm.
<HandyMan> Well, it's unnecessary. You had me at hello.
<FWMldr> Okay, that made me laugh. Seriously, you don't really expect
anything to happen, do you?
<HandyMan> I live in hope.
<FWMldr> so, besides me being on my knees with your cock in my mouth, what
else do you hope for?
<HandyMan> World peace?
<FWMldr> really? I was hoping you'd say something about you bent over my
desk with my cock up your ass. Oh well. World peace has a certain charm, I
suppose.
<HandyMan> You were hoping for that? Progress at last!
<FWMldr> Hey, I'm human. Reading the right words can give me a hard-on like
any guy. With that comes fantasies....
<HandyMan> Fantasies? Do tell. I'm intrigued.
<FWMldr> sorry, Krycek. I've said too much. I'll leave the graphic
descriptions to you. Besides, I'm not as desperate as you are.
<HandyMan> Not as desperate? I think you're projecting.
<FWMldr> Am I? Correct me if I'm wrong, but aren't you the one who started
coming on to me because you're horny?
<HandyMan> Okay, I'll concede that much, I suppose. So, just to get the
record straight —you're at least admitting to being a willing audience for
my desperate fantasies?
<FWMldr> Why not? I can blame it on boredom and not enough blood to the
brain.
<HandyMan> Anything as long as you don't admit that you want to hear this, I
suppose?
<FWMldr> You got it in one.
<HandyMan> I like a man who can be honest about his own delusions. Charming,
really.
<FWMldr> And charming you is high on my list of priorities, Krycek.
<HandyMan> I'm flattered. Well, going back to your comment about the desk...
It's not really your cock up my ass that I'm fantasizing about right now.
Have you ever been fucked, Fox? I like to imagine you haven't. Maybe you've
indulged in a few secret explorations of your own, sweaty nights on your
couch, frantically stroking your cock with one hand while you use the other
to send greedy fingers exploring, searching for that one spot, the one that
makes you tremble and buck, sending semen shooting all over your hand.
<FWMldr> Hmmm....don't tell me, you want to go where no man has gone
before....
<HandyMan> Sure, why not? It's my fantasy —you're just the bored voyeur.
<FWMldr> right....right.... okay, so what's your set up?
<HandyMan> Well, let's see... I'll go back to where I'm fucking your face.
I'm lost in your mouth, and I know I'm holding your hair too tightly,
slamming too hard into you, but I'm almost to far gone to care. One of my
thrusts is too much for you, and I'm brought back to reality when I feel,
then hear, you gag. I pull out and stare down at you as you shudder and
cough. I almost feel a little bad about it, but then I look down and see how
hard you are, how your neglected cock is straining upwards, begging for
attention.
<FWMldr> you... you know... if you ever made me gag...I'd have to kick your
ass...
<HandyMan> Would you? I'd like to test that sometime.
<FWMldr> Right.
<HandyMan> Well, at least that's not an outright no. Anyway, it's my
fantasy, so, you're still coughing a bit, but haven't kicked my ass. I pull
you up, and push you back onto your couch (we're in your apartment for this
one, I think). I run a hand lightly along your cock and you moan, pushing
upward, seeking more. I'm in a generous mood, so I bend over you and take
your cock deep, sucking and licking, showing you exactly how it's done.
<FWMldr> oh god....
<FWMldr> sorry, that slipped
<HandyMan> No apologies necessary. So, let's see. I'm still sucking you,
but it's just a distraction for you really. I begin caressing your balls
with my hand, before stroking behind them, moving carefully upwards. My
finger glances against the puckered opening and you buck up into my mouth.
(Note, however, that I still don't gag.) On the crest of your moan, I shove
the finger inside of you and revel in the feeling of you opening up, taut
muscles rippling and grasping my finger as I insinuate a second inside you.
<FWMldr> I push against your finger, only aware of the heat of your mouth on
my cock and the pressure of you pushing your finger inside me... I don't know what feels better....
<FWMldr> Um, that slipped too
<HandyMan> You're cracking... at last! Okay, with two fingers inside you
now, I angle up and push. You shout and push yourself even further down my
throat. I'm suddenly aware of how violently your thighs are trembling, how
close to the edge you are. I pull my mouth away and you whimper at the loss,
your cock straining helplessly into the air.
<FWMldr> don't get too cocky... I'm taking pity on you. I want to feel your
mouth on me again, but when I look in your eyes, I can tell you have
something else in mind....
<HandyMan> Ah! The infamous Spooky intuition —right as usual. My other
hand reaches for the surface of the coffee table and scrambles for a bottle
of lube (yes, in my fantasies, such necessities are always readily
available). Flipping open the cap, I carefully coat my cock with it, my
fingers in your ass giving a few last lingering strokes. Pulling them out, I
begin pushing my cock against your open, fluttering hole.
<FWMldr> oh god...it's almost too much and I resist at first...but as I
adjust, it starts to feel so good... my body relaxes and I hear myself groan
as you slide into me...
<HandyMan> I've got such tight rein on myself, holding back, waiting for you
to adjust, that it's almost become painful. When I feel you begin to relax,
I let out a sigh of relief that turns into a moan. Grabbing your hips, I
pull your further onto my lap and begin pounding, wanting, needing, to get
deeper, further inside you.
<FWMldr> I've never felt anything like this before...I want more of you
inside me and I meet each thrust, wanting as much of you as possible.. My
cock is aching and I move my hand down to grasp it.
<HandyMan> Oh good, you've got things in hand then —which is fortunate,
because I've got to go. My encryption program came through, and I'm in.
Have a good night, Foxy. I enjoyed it.
Hit and Run
by Lucy Snowe and Frankie
<HandyMan> Surfing the web on a Friday night? Do you ever get out?
