I'm walking through the halls of the Hoover building, and although everyone
is looking at me as if I'm deranged, there's not a thing they can do to me.
Stopping outside Skinner's office, I begin a pleasant conversation with his
secretary and she tells me that I was really missed. I smile pleasantly and
ask if the old guy's here. She nods and says he's expecting me. I don't
bother to knock before going in.
"Good morning, Alex." Skinner smiles as he gets up to shake my hand. "Have
a seat."
I return the smile, and sit down. For the first time I notice that my left
arm is whole and for a brief moment I wonder how it happened. The details
suddenly seem trivial so I turn my attention back to Skinner.
"Thank you for seeing me on such short notice, Sir."
"Well, I was happy to hear that one of our best agents was ready to return to
his position here at the Bureau. You were really missed."
"I'm grateful for the chance to redeem myself."
The door suddenly flies open and Mulder bursts into the room screaming my
name. Before I can react, he's knocked me from my chair and has me down on
the ground as he punches me mercilessly. I don't resist him and simply put
my hands in front of my face to shield myself from his blows. For some
reason I feel no pain when each strike makes contact. Skinner's voice is
booming over Mulder's angry shouts and I feel Mulder lifted off me. I lower
my hands and see that Mulder is smiling down at me.
"Welcome back. We really missed you." He puts out a hand to help me to my
feet and pulls me to him in a warm embrace. After kissing my cheek, he lets
me go and looks at Skinner, who is watching us with a peculiar expression on
his face.
"I told you he wouldn't fight back." Skinner seems smug as he makes this
statement and I'm about to tell him why when Scully walks into the office.
"Hello, Alex. I have a letter for you. It's from Luis Cardinale." She
hands me an envelope, but there's nothing in there from my former associate.
When I look at her, puzzled, she smiles. "Well, he's dead. Of course
there's nothing there. He died because he killed my sister. Welcome back.
We really missed you." She walks out of the office and closes the door
behind her.
I turn to Mulder and see that he is talking on his cell phone. "Yeah, he's
here. Hold on." He holds it out to me. "It's for you."
"Thank you." My voice sounds so young to my own ears and I see Skinner laugh
as if I've told the funniest joke he's ever heard. I put the phone to my
ear. "Hello?"
"Alex. I see you've regained their trust. Good. I have a job for you to
do."
I recognize the voice of the man who ruined my life and throw the phone
across the room. It bounces off the back wall and Mulder frowns as he goes
to retrieve it.
"I'd like to get back to work, Sir. Where have I been assigned?"
Skinner walks to me, stopping only a few inches away. I should feel
uncomfortable because of his proximity to me, but I relax and wait for him to
speak. He doesn't say anything, continuing to stare at me.
"Sir?"
Mulder comes up behind me and places his hands on my shoulders, rubbing them
as if I'm a boxer he's getting ready for a fight.
"You can take him," he whispers in my ear. "Do it. You've regained his
trust, now fuck him over, Alex."
I shake my head and look into Skinner's eyes. They're completely blank
though not unfriendly. He leans toward me and for a fleeting moment I'm
convinced he's going to kiss me.
"He trusts you, Alex," he whispers in my ear. "Now you can really hurt him."
Again I shake my head. They don't understand why I'm here. I thought they
were going to give me a second chance but they don't really expect me to
change. I realize I can't be in the same room with them and make a move for
the door. Mulder's fingers dig into my shoulders and Skinner steps closer,
trapping me between the two of them.
That's where I always wake up.
END
Beggars Would Ride
by Frankie
May 1999
