Alex was very lonely most of the time—he lived by himself in his little
burrow, venturing out for food and always being cautious of the other,
bigger animals who would try and snatch away any food he had gathered for
himself. But Alex was quick on his little legs, and he could outrun most of
them, except for one.
Mulder the fox.
Mulder was wily and sleek, with very soft fur and big brown eyes. Secretly,
Alex thought he was beautiful, but Mulder didn't like Alex much, for Alex
was only a rat and rats were not as smart or as clean as foxes. So every
time Mulder saw Alex, he would chase him. He chased him and chased him,
barking his high-pitched bark. Little Alex's heart would pound in his ears
like a drum as he ran.
Over and over the forest floor, Mulder chased Alex until he was exhausted
and his little fox legs couldn't run anymore. Then he would laugh.
"Stupid rat," he would sneer to his friend, Scully the red squirrel.
Scully shook her flouncy little tail. "You really shouldn't scare him like
that, Mulder," she warned. "One day he's going to teach you a lesson."
"Alex? Not likely!" Mulder's fur bristled. "He's just a rat, and everyone
in the forest knows that rats are scoundrels. He steals food that rightly
belongs to other animals, so I chase him. It's the natural order of
things."
"Mulder, I think you have issues about the rat," Scully said, batting her
round blue eyes. Her whiskers twitched, and she suddenly screeched and
skittered up the nearest tree.
"What the—"
Then Mulder saw it: Skinner the bald eagle, swooping down on him from above!
"Yeow!" Mulder dove into the nearest shrub. For all his cunning and
bravery, Mulder knew that eagles liked to carry off small prey like rabbits
and foxes and eat them, and he didn't want to be eaten!
"Come on out, scaredy-cat," Skinner said, flapping his wings as he landed on
the ground. "It's only me."
Mulder poked out his head. "Scaredy-CAT? That's an insult! I am a member
of the canine family." Mulder barked, to prove it.
Skinner opened his beak and let out a loud cry that made Mulder's fur stand
on end and sent him diving back into the shrub.
Skinner stamped the ground with his feet. "I'm just patrolling the forest,
keeping order. I got a call earlier that the three blind mice had found
their tails and wanted help bringing the farmer's wife to justice. But when
I checked it out, there was nobody there."
"Sounds like the gophers again," Scully said.
There were three gophers who always made trouble. They lived together in a
burrow deep beneath the forest floor. None of the other animals knew how to
get there, except for Mulder, and he wasn't telling.
Skinner said, "Now I'm just looking to see if any other animals need help."
"Mulder needs help." Quick as a lightning flash, Scully ran down the trunk
of the tree. "He's got issues about the rat."
"The rat? You mean Alex?" Skinner squinted his knowing black eyes at
Mulder.
"I do NOT have issues about the rat!" Mulder hopped up from his place in
the shrub and stood in front of Skinner, tail vibrating.
"He can't leave Alex alone," Scully taunted. "Why would he chase him all
the time if he didn't?"
Mulder leapt in front of her as if to pounce, and Scully skittered away to
hide behind Skinner.
"Just—wait—til—I—catch YOU!"
Mulder and Scully ran around and around in circles. Mulder swiped at
Scully's tail with his silky paws, with her shouting "ISSUES!" and laughing,
just out of reach. Skinner tried to separate them with his wing, but soon
gave up when the feathers started to fly.
Little did they know that high above them in the treetops, coiled around a
branch and peering out with his beady black eyes was Spender the snake.
"S-s-s-o, Mulder has issues, does he?"
And so Spender (CGB to his friends, of which he had none) slipped silently
down from his branch and slithered off into the forest.
"Aha!"
Alex couldn't believe his luck! Here was a huge pile of acorns, ripe for
the taking! It wasn't what he normally liked to eat, but if you were Alex,
you'd know that a rat must never pass up an opportunity for food.
"Some squirrel must have gone off and left it," Alex mumbled to himself as
he munched.
"Not quite."
A huge shadow fell over Alex, and he jumped, dropping his acorn on the
ground. He swallowed hard, and his little body trembled from nose to tail.
"Don't be nervous, Alex-s-s-s-s." Spender coiled himself around Alex so he
couldn't run away, not that it made a difference—he was frozen to the
spot.
Alex's eyes glittered with fright. Spender's long, black tongue darted out
from between his lips. "You know, Mulder is-s-s looking for you," he said.
Oh great! As if Spender wasn't bad enough. Now, if he survived this, he
had to worry about Mulder too?!
Alex's teeth chattered. "W-what does he want?"
"Oh, you know." Spender slithered around Alex, letting his hard, rough
scales rub against Alex' soft fur. "He wants to chase you again. But this
time, he wants to catch you—" Spender lowered his head until he and Alex
were nose-to-nose. "And EAT YOU!"
Alex squealed. Oh, no no no! This was too much! No rat could handle this,
not even the bravest—
"But I can help you, Alex," Spender said. "For a price."
"A-a price?" Alex was still very nervous, but at least Spender didn't want
to eat him! Not today. He didn't think...
"W-well, what could I have that you would possibly want?" Alex asked.
Spender lowered his face to Alex again. "What've you got?"
"Well—" Alex quickly reached behind him and pulled out a crumpled package
with some sort of strange markings on the front.
Spender gave it and him a strange look. "What is-s-s THAT?" Spender asked.
Alex said: "I don't know. I found it under a tree this morning."
Before Alex could say any more, Spender snatched the bundle away and shook
it. Something fell out! Spender bent down and sniffed—then he sniffed
again.
The sun was shining high in the sky... and then one of the objects began to
smoke!
"Fire!" Alex screamed, and ducked behind the pile of acorns.
"No. Wait." Spender picked it up in his mouth and breathed deep.
Alex held his breath, and waited.
"Oooooh, yeah!" the big snake cried out. "Where have you been all my
life?"
Alex peeked around and saw Spender lying on the ground next to the cigarette
with a strange, blissed-out look on his face.
"I'll help you, Alex," Spender said, taking another long drag. "And I'll
take these—" He snapped up all the cigarettes into his mouth at once.
"This will do as payment—for a s-s-start."
Spender slithered off into the trees, leaving Alex to wonder what had just
happened.
"Not again!"
Alex raced through the forest, running so fast he almost flew. He had to—
Mulder was breathing down his back paws!
"Hold still, you little coward!" Mulder shouted at him.
With a burst of speed, Alex sprang ahead.
"Come back here!"
"Mulder, get a grip!" Alex called back. His little heart was pounding in
his ears, and he was breathing fast. "I never did anything to you!"
"You stole my sunflower seeds!"
"Those were just lying there, underneath the sunflower. Anybody could have
them!"
"You killed my father!"
"No, I didn't! Your father got caught in a bear trap and I just happened to
find him. He was already dead when I got there!"
But that wasn't what Mulder wanted to hear. "You're lying!" he panted. He
was gaining on Alex again! "You're a lying, twisted, murdering rat-bastard!
...And you've got a stupid-ass haircut!"
"Oh, come now, Mulder. That isn't very nic-s-s-s-s-se."
Mulder's paws skidded to a stop as Spender dropped from a tree in front of
him. He was eating something Mulder had never seen before—whatever it
was, it was on fire and it smelled horrible!
Meanwhile, Alex continued to run. The pounding of his heart and feet and
his breathing were all so loud in his ears that it took a long time for him
to realize that Mulder was no longer behind him.
"What?" Alex sniffed the air. His tiny brown nose twitched and pulsed.
There, on the wind. He could smell it—Mulder was in trouble!
"Oh, Mulder. Is that the bes-s-st you can do?"
Mulder snarled. "Just try me."
Spender lashed out. Mulder snapped his body backwards, but it had been a
very close shot.
"Hey, I was just chasing the rat, minding my own business—" Mulder
sidestepped another swipe. "But if I'd known you were so fond of him—"
"'Fond?' Of the rat? You make me laugh!" Spender's tail shot out,
wrapping around Mulder's neck. He dragged the fox to the ground.
Looming over Mulder, Spender's face dropped closer. "I only used the rat to
get to you. Only he was too s-s-s-stupid to know that."
Little did Spender know that Alex had hurried back over his steps and was
now crouched close by.
"So what? I guess his father never taught him not to get into bed with a
snake."
Spender tightened his grip around Mulder's neck, and he hissed.
"Wait! If those are gonna be my last words, I can do better!"
"You won't have the chanc-s-s-s-se!"
"I wouldn't be so sure about that!"
Spender and Mulder looked around, and there they were—his friends, the
three gophers!
"Are you completely stupid?" Spender said.
One of them shrugged. "Hey, don't yell at us. We just came here with that
guy."
Suddenly there was a terrible screeching overhead. Mulder and Spender both
looked up.
Spender's tail slipped from around Mulder's neck. Every scale on his body
went completely white. "Oh no."
"H'oh yeah!" Skinner the bald eagle lunged at Spender, snatching him up in
his claws. He carried Spender off high above the trees, and he never
bothered any animal in the forest again—until next season.
The three gophers cheered, dancing around and high-fiving each other.
A sound caught their attention. They looked over at where Mulder lay. He
was a mess—his coat was dirty, and patches of his fur were missing.
"Oh boy," one of the gophers said to the other two. "We'd better go help
him."
"No, really. I'm fine," Mulder said, his voice weak. He started to
chuckle, then he coughed. "I can walk." He tried to get to his feet. "I
really want to thank you guys for coming to my rescue like that. You're
true friends."
The three gophers blinked. "Rescue?" "What's he talking about?" "Dunno,
man."
Mulder lifted his head. "Didn't you guys go find Skinner while I was
fighting the snake?"
The gophers shook their heads. "Huh-uh," they said. Then one spoke up:
"We were just hanging out over by the abandoned badger's den."
"We're thinking of moving," the second gopher said.
"Shut up!" hissed the third.
The first gopher looked at the other two. Then he said, "We heard running,
and so we followed the sound."
"That's how we found your friend the rat talking to Skinner," the second
gopher said. "We just followed them here."
"My `friend' the rat?" "Yeah." "Yep." "That's right."
There was a rustle of leaves, and then Alex stepped out, blinking in the
afternoon sun. His whiskers twitched.
"Well, we'd better be going now," the first gopher said. "We'd offer to
take you back to our burrow and clean you up, but—uh, uhm..."
"I'll take care of it," Alex said, stepping forward.
The three gophers sighed with great relief, and scurried off. As they
disappeared into the woods, Mulder heard one say: "Scully was right. The
fox DOES have issues..."
"What are you going to do?" Mulder bared his teeth. He was anxious now.
Alex had walked around and was now standing behind him, out of sight.
"Now Mulder, is that any way to talk to someone who just saved your life?"
The fox blinked as he thought about this. "Well, I guess I—hey! What are
you doing to my tail?"
"Oh, nothing." But it was far from nothing, as Mulder saw when carefully
lifted his head and peered around. His large brown eyes grew even larger.
"Hey—stop that! What if somebody sees?!"
"Then they'll see me doing this!" Alex wrapped Mulder's tail around him
like a fur stole, and paraded around. Then he took the fox' bushy tail in
both hands and used it as a jump rope!
Mulder laid his head on the ground. "This is so humiliating."
Suddenly, the sensations changed. Alex was no longer tugging on his tail,
but he was...tickling him? Mulder could feel it—Alex's tiny nose and
whiskers, twitching and nudging away in the spot right underneath his tail,
and—"YEEEEEEEOOOOOWWWWW!" Mulder had never felt this good in his life! If
he had been able to stand, he would have done summersaults in the air!
"Alex, where did you learn—whoa!" Every strand of fur stood on its end,
and the fox' entire body rocked with pleasure.
In the skies overhead, Skinner looked down on the scene in the forest. He
saw the fox, and the little rat behind him.
"A rat in a foxhole." The great eagle shook his head. "Uh-uh. I am not
getting involved in that."
And he flew away. And Alex and Mulder became the best of friends. They soon
moved into a burrow of their own together, and Alex was never lonely again.
The Fox and the Rat: An Animated Adventure
by Cattnip
Once upon a time in the forest, there lived a rat named Alex.
