"Hello?" he said a second time, only to receive a soft click as his
response.
Forget it, Mulder. Happens to millions of people, every day.
Doesn't mean shit.
Just the same, he thought it might.
It had been over three months since that Saturday morning when
Krycek rose from Mulder's bed, dressed slowly, and left with only a
single, hesitant, backward glance.
And Mulder had let him go.
He couldn't blame Alex, he guessed. He knew from the events of
the night before that the younger man was in a far more fragile state
than he ever could have imagined. He should have been more
sensitive. More reassuring...
Alex had awakened to find him turned on his side, head propped up
in one hand, studying him intently. He'd held Alex's gaze for only a
few seconds before the green eyes flitted away.
"You don't look very comfortable."
Very softly replied. "And you look very comfortable."
"My bed."
Alex kept his eyes averted.
"Breakfast?"
"No...thank you."
"Not hungry?"
"I just...I don't usually eat breakfast."
"It's the most important meal of the day."
"That's what my mother always told me..."
"You have a mother, Krycek?"
Alex's head snapped to the right, and he looked at Mulder. Hurt
flashed in his eyes so quickly that the older man thought he might
have imagined it. But as fast as it had appeared, it was gone,
replaced by that practiced, blank stare.
Mulder shrugged. "I was just...I was curious about you, that's all."
Alex's eyes again slipped away. "I have to go."
"Right now?"
"...Yeah."
"Working on a Saturday, Krycek? What kind of slavedrivers do you
work for?" The right corner of his mouth dropped back down into
place when Krycek slipped out of bed, pulled on his clothes, and
walked slowly toward the door. He stopped, hand on the knob, and
looked over at Mulder for at least four seconds before his eyes
lowered, and he opened the door and left.
And now, months later, he hadn't seen him. Hadn't heard a thing.
He tried like hell to convince himself that he wasn't concerned, but
there wasn't a day that went by that he didn't think of Alex and
wonder where he was. There wasn't a night that his body didn't
hunger for that sweet, restrained wildness he'd tasted so briefly. But
what was he to do? He'd blown it that morning.
Or maybe he hadn't. Maybe Alex would have left no matter what he
did or said. It had looked as if he'd never know. Until now.
It wasn't him.
Mulder rubbed his hand across his forehead and down his cheek,
then walked into the kitchen.
"Hello?"
Mulder pressed the tiny button on the side of his watch, illuminating
the face.
One twenty-four.
And no response.
His heart leapt into his throat. Too much coincidence.
"It's you, isn't it?"
More silence.
"I thought we might be past this....um...been a long time..."
Soft sound of a breath being drawn.
"Are you in town? If so, I'd like to see you....that is, if you'd like to
see me."
He waited.
Seconds later, the caller hung up.
He replaced the phone in the cradle and turned onto his side. He
stared into darkness for quite a while, thinking.
So he was around. And obviously still thinking about them. Even
so, he wouldn't show. Not tonight, anyway. He was just calling to
feel things out. To hear Mulder's voice...try to make a
determination on where they might stand...
Well, hopefully he'd made it clear where they stood. Where he
stood, anyway.
Mulder closed his eyes and fell into an uneasy sleep.
"I think you've lost it, Mulder..." Scully practically ran to keep up
with him as they left the Credit Union. "...Why in God's name
would Skinner sign off on such a ridiculous..."
Scully's words faded and were lost, as Mulder caught a fleeting
glimpse of a tall, leather-jacketed figure, disappearing through a
crowd of people across the street. He stopped cold, causing Scully
to swerve quickly, just barely avoiding a collision with him.
"Mulder?" She attempted to follow his gaze. "What is it? What do
you see?"
Mulder gave no answer. All his concentration was focused across
the street.
"Mul-der..."
"Yeah?"
"What's so fascinating over there?"
His eyes finally dropped away, unable to find what he was looking
for. "Nothing."
"Nothing? You looked like a leopard eyeing its next meal."
Mulder returned a bland expression. "Just thought I saw someone I
knew."
"Tall, leggy blonde with blue eyes?"
"What?"
"The look in your eyes was downright predatory."
Mulder shrugged. "You're exaggerating, but...tall, yes. Long legs?
Yeah, I guess so...but you got the hair and eyes wrong. Dark. With
laser green eyes."
"Killer."
"Huh?"
Scully frowned at the reaction. "I just meant that whoever it is must
be gorgeous."
Mulder gave his partner a trace of a smile. "Yeah.
Yeah......gorgeous. Come on, let's go get some lunch. You can
finish yelling at me at Benny's..."
Six-eighteen.
Mulder stuffed the last two bites of his pizza into his mouth and
answered the ringing phone. Silence met his muffled 'hello'. He
swallowed quickly and spoke.
"Are you going to talk to me, tonight?"
Nothing.
"I saw you today. I know it was you...I'd know you anywhere. If
Scully hadn't been with me...would you have stayed? Would you?"
Receiving no answer, he pressed on. "Would you have let me come
across the street and follow you? Maybe you would have led me
back to the place where you're staying and let me in, and we
could've....talked...I would have liked that very much. Would you
have liked that? ........Alex?"
He heard the faint gasp then the return to silence.
"What is it?" he asked softly. "Do you like it when I say your name?
Hmm? Why don't you come on over, and I'll whisper it in your
ear..."
Still nothing.
"I don't know how else to say it you....Alex.....I want you here.
Please come."
Mulder pulled the phone away from his ear and disconnected.
He slouched back against the sofa and wondered if he'd done the
right thing.
He wouldn't be finding out tonight.
Friday.
Again.
Followed by Saturday.
Again.
Mulder lay back on the sofa and switched the television on. He
wandered from channel to channel, stopping on some cheesy,
plotless smut. Unable to stay interested, he turned the sound down
and closed his eyes. As he drifted toward sleep, his remaining
shreds of consciousness filled with images of the beautiful,
emerald-eyed man who for months had hidden from him and who
only now had resurfaced, placing himself squarely at the center of
Mulder's thoughts.
Again.
Mulder jerked into a sitting position, listening. A quick glance at his
watch gave him the time.
One thirty-one.
He cocked his head, concentrating on the silence.
Something woke him; he was sure of it. He rose from the sofa and
headed for the door, telling himself that there was no point.
Still, he walked.
When he reached the door, he listened carefully.
Quiet.
He turned the knob and swung the door open, practically jumping
out of his skin when he met a pair of startled green eyes. The two
men stared at each other for an eternity before Mulder stepped
back, allowing his visitor to enter.
Krycek walked in slowly, not at all sure he should have done this.
Too late now, ain't it?
"Why don't you ever talk to me on the phone?"
The younger man shrugged and looked away.
"Where've you been?"
"Here and there," he answered softly.
Mulder walked past him, entering the living room. He reached the
sofa and turned around. Alex remained by the door.
"Think you're safer over there?"
Alex swallowed hard. He took a deep breath and stepped into the
room, stopping a few feet from where Mulder stood.
"Want something to drink, or eat, or anything?"
Krycek shook his head, watching the other man's mouth. He fought
down the urge to take the last few steps over to Mulder and devour
that fucking incredible mouth. It had been far...far too long...
Mulder read Alex's expression and decided that he wasn't going to
wait around for the younger man to act on his feelings. He closed
the distance between them and hooked an arm around the trim
waist, yanking Alex against him. His mouth grazed the perfectly
bowed lips in front of him, and he whispered against them, "If this
isn't what you want, tell me now."
Alex flinched, trying to imagine such words leaving his lips. He
couldn't. He pressed forward, offering Mulder his body and his
mouth.
The older man jumped on the overture instantly. He covered Alex's
lips with his own, drinking in the soft whimpers. His hands slid up
and over the expanse of the muscular back, stroking and gently
kneading as he continued to feed on the exquisitely pliant mouth.
He pulled away just a bit, moaning against Alex's cheek, "I missed
you."
The admission startled the younger man.
Mulder smiled, stroking the furrowed brow. "Why does that
surprise you so much?"
"I...I don't...I didn't think..."
Mulder cocked his head. "Didn't think what?"
Alex fell silent and looked down at the floor.
"Why did you leave that morning? And why did you stay away so
long?"
"It...it just didn't seem like..." Alex shook his head and turned away.
Mulder moved with him, maintaining face to face contact. "Didn't
seem like what? Alex, if I did something that bothered you...if
something I said has kept you away all this time, I'd really like to
know what it is so I don't do it again."
"I didn't..." He stopped and started again. "I thought I was reading
way too much into it. That morning...I woke up next to you, and
my heart was in my mouth. You asked me to stay, and I can't...I
can't tell you how that felt. But in the morning...you just seemed so
nonchalant about the whole thing, and I realized that it was no
biggie for you. I was just another body in your bed..."
"Is that what you thought? Is that what you still think?"
Alex lowered his gaze, but Mulder caught his face between both
hands, forcing him to look back.
"Do you know how long it had been since I'd slept with anyone?
Do you also know that I haven't been with anyone since you?
Jesus, Alex, you fucked me up but good. If you hadn't come back
into my life, I probably wouldn't ever have had the desire to have
sex again."
Alex merely sighed.
"You think that's bullshit?" Mulder asked softly, tracing the swell of
the other man's lower lip with the tips of two fingers. "I swear to
you it isn't."
Alex's lips twitched and parted. His eyes dropped shut as his tongue
inched out, tentatively stroking the fingers before it.
"I'm so glad you came back," Mulder told him, once again
wrapping one arm around his waist, while he allowed Alex to lick,
then suck, on his fingers. He exhaled heavily. "What do you say we
take this into the bedroom?"
Alex nodded and followed the older man into the next room. Shaky
hands fumbled with buttons and zippers until both men were naked
and falling onto the bed, slithering and writhing all over each other.
"Alex," Mulder gasped between ravenous kisses, "baby...I can't...I
can't take this slow. Not tonight." He rubbed his cock frantically
against the other man's thigh. "Please...I missed you so much."
This was different.
On their first two encounters, Mulder had been in control.
Completely and totally. And now, here he was, very much out of
control. Rubbing against him like a cat in heat, begging for all
Alex's attention. It was too much to take.
Alex spun the older man beneath him, attacking his throat, his
chest...biting and sucking everywhere, driving Mulder past the point
of insanity.
"God...oh....ah, oww....fuck, baby...don't stop..."
Mulder twisted under Alex's weight, inciting the younger man to
greater heights of sexual violence. He sank his teeth into the padded
muscle of Mulder's shoulder, just shy of drawing blood. The older
man's head burrowed into the pillows, and he shrieked in pain. Alex
tried to draw back, but a pair of hands at his head forced him to
remain where he was.
"Fuck me, Alex," Mulder sobbed in desperation. "Come on, do it!"
Unable to deny his lover, Alex pulled him into position and
slammed into him, unprepared. This time the scream came from
both men. Alex couldn't waste time on letting Mulder adjust. He
pulled out almost all the way and rammed back in, causing Mulder's
head to hit the oak headboard on every thrust.
"Shit...oh.....oh, fuck!" Alex increased his speed, now wrapping
Mulder's aching cock in his fist and jerking it quickly. "Can't hold
it...come on..."
Both men exploded simultaneously, hurling gut-twisting screams
into the air as they came inside and all over each other. Alex fell
onto Mulder's chest, sliding on the sweat-soaked skin. Except for
the occasional tremor, both men lay motionless, unable to even
breathe. Long minutes later, Alex raised his head and drew some air
into his lungs. He looked down at the man who still lay virtually
unconscious beneath him. He cautiously caressed one slick
cheekbone.
"Mulder?"
No answer.
"Mulder....talk to me."
The older man's eyelids fluttered, and he drew in a long, sharp
breath.
Relief.
The older man gave him a weak grin. "Oh. My. God."
Alex chewed on his own lower lip. "I'm sorry...I...you...you wanted
me to..."
Mulder nodded slowly. "And it was fucking fantastic. God....Alex,
you blew me away."
Alex closed his eyes and lowered his head to Mulder's shoulder. He
purred with contentment as the older man stroked his hair.
"You realize, of course, that I can't let you go, now."
"What do you mean?"
"Just what I said. You're dangerous, Krycek. I can't in all good
conscience let you loose on the street. I'm going to have to keep
you here where I can keep an um.....an eye on you."
Alex tucked his arms under Mulder's back and trailed a line of
kisses along the bruises that were already forming on his shoulder.
"Oh, really?"
"Really. And don't give me any shit about it. I don't want to have to
cuff you to the bed...wait a minute, what am I saying? Go
ahead...give me some shit."
Alex laughed softly, and the sound of it filled Mulder with
happiness.
"Hey, Fox?"
"Uh....Fox? Give him an inch, he'll take a mile..."
"Mulder's just a little impersonal, don't you think? If you really hate
me calling you Fox, I won't..."
Long sigh. "It's...it's okay. I suppose you could call me Fox. Just
don't let it get around. Before you know it, everybody will want
to do it." Fox kissed the top of Alex's head. "What were you
going to ask?"
"I was just going to say, you don't have to wait until I give you a
hard time, you know. You can cuff me to the bed whenever you
want."
"I'll remember you said that..." He stroked the younger man's back
and nuzzled the damp hair. "Will you stay with me?"
"For the weekend, you mean?"
Fox looked up to the ceiling, opening and closing his mouth. His
gaze shifted down to the man in his arms, and he gave him a
devastating smile. "For a start."
Disconnected
by Aries
Mulder walked into apartment forty-two, to the ringing of the
phone. He took off his coat,and threw it on the sofa before walking
over to the desk to answer it. He'd long given up on the notion that
one day the voice on the other end would belong to one Alex
Krycek, but when he delivered his usual deadpan greeting, it was
met by silence.
