RATales Archive

Some Jazzy Feedback

by RhymePhile


JazzieBee sent me some *excellent* feedback on my most recent story, "The Rat and Alanna Sue", and I chose to respond this way. Of course, you won't find out what Jazz wrote to me, but suffice to say I wanted to share this with the group to show you what great feedback will get you.


The small Asian girl yawned and kicked at the covers. It had been a long day, what with all the feedback letters she had written and her crazy requests for votes in that poll. All she wanted now was to get a nice, long night's rest.

Sighing, she turned over, and just about rolled on top of a very handsome, very nice-smelling, *very* leather-jacketed Alex Krycek.

"Hullo," he said nonchalantly.

"Oh My God," she sputtered.

"Not quite, but close. You can call me Alex."

"Um, Alex. What the hell are you doing in my bed?"

He yawned and put his good arm behind his head to prop himself up. "A friend sent me, Jazz."

A friend? She didn't panic, because first of all this *was* Alex lying here in her bed, and secondly, only one person she knew called her "Jazz".

"Who?"

"Oh, I think you know," he said with a wink. "She sent me on a personal mission...I'm not one to argue with her."

"*She*, huh? Would this person happen to be..."

"Yes," he answered for her. "Rhyme sent me."

"All the way to Australia?"

He shrugged, which was kinda hard considering he only had one really good-working shoulder. "I get frequent-flyer miles."

"Must have been an important mission to get all the way down here..." she looked down at his gorgeous form, sprawled across her covers, "...and into my bed."

Alex moved closer to her and grinned his trademark wry smirk. "She sent me personally to thank you for that fantastic feedback she received from you. It was one of the best pieces of inventive writing she has read in a while." Alex lowered his eyelids. "I kinda liked it myself."

She looked slightly perplexed for a moment. "Personally?"

He smiled again. "Uh-huh. She and I are real close, if you know what I mean. She couldn't think of a proper way to repay you, so she suggested I come for a personal visit, since you're all the way down here in Oz."

"How nice of her."

"Yes," he nodded, "but that's not all."

She swallowed, the heat rising to her face. "It's...it's not?"

Alex slowly removed his jacket, and brushed a hand through his unkempt hair. "No....but wouldn't you rather *see* what else I'm here for, instead of listening to me *tell* you about it?"

"Are there any weapons involved?" she asked, worried. This was RhymePhile, after all.

His eyebrows rose. "Not unless you want them to be."

"Uh, no."

Alex now kicked off his black steel-tipped boots. "Can you toss me an extra pillow?"

The pillow was tossed and tucked under Alex's head. "Better," he sighed. "Do you know how long it takes to fly from New Jersey to Australia?"

"Are you tired?" she asked.

Alex wrapped his arm around her head and licked his lips. "Jazz, my dear, I'm just getting warmed up."

Exeunt