RATales Archive

Falling

by Satina


Title: Falling (sequel to Leave)
Author: themkshrine@yahoo.com (Satina)
Website: http://themkshrine.angelfire.com/satina.html
Rating: NC-17
Keywords: M/K, slash, songfic
Disclaimer: Not mine. None of it. I'm a thief and proud of it.
Summary: "I'm sorry," said Mulder again, in a voice much softer than the first time. "I never meant to hurt you." His eyes met Alex's and he let the double meaning cross the electric current between them. Alex swallowed hard and made his face impassive. "I'm fine. It's nothing I haven't been through with you before."
Spoilers: Um...nope. Not this time, folks.
Notes: Thank you to Fran, who gave me glowing feedback and made "Leave" sound so sad I almost cried. That's when I sat down and started this. And thank you to Ratadder, who inspired the beginning of this trilogy with her lyric choice, "Too Little Too Late," And of course, thank you to the BareNaked Ladies for their CD, "Maroon," from which all three songs in this series are taken. Big thanks to my beta and baby, Shan, and my beta and buddy, Rachel. Without you, this wouldn't "suck" as well. Ha ha!
Archive: Sure...share the love. Just tell me where so I can visit.
Feedback: Oh god yes please. I can't go on without it. Yeah...ain't too proud to beg. themkshrine@yahoo.com


"I told you not to hurt him!" Mulder snapped, hurrying over to the chair in the middle of the warehouse in three swift strides.

"What, are you fucking kidding me? The son of a bitch almost killed me!" replied the other man, wiping the blood from his nose and mouth with a shaking hand. "I should charge you extra! This is gonna take stitches!" He pointed to the jagged tear, shallow but bloody, gleaming in the middle of an obvious bootprint on the side of his face.

"Whatever," said Mulder, waving him away dismissively. "Bill me."

The angry man spit on the cement floor and left, slamming the heavy metal doors behind him with an echoing clang.

Mulder sighed heavily and went down on one knee in front of the chair, reaching out to touch the face of the man who was slumped in it, unconscious. Slowly he traced his fingers down the stubbly cheek, pausing to wipe the blood from the soft, plump lips with his thumb.

"Jesus, Krycek," he murmured to himself. "Is it always going to be this way with us?" The sprawling man didn't respond. Mulder pressed his fingers to the side of Alex's neck to check his pulse, and satisfied with its strength, reached around to the back of the chair and felt the cuffs to make sure they weren't cutting into his captive's wrist. He winced a bit at the thought of Alex waking up scared and bound, but he wanted to make sure he got the chance to say everything he had come here to say. He hadn't meant for his little helper to knock Alex unconscious. He'd only paid the man to stake out the bar and catch and restrain Alex for him at this empty warehouse. He'd specifically told the man that his target was not to be harmed.

Of course, he should have known that Alex wouldn't go down without a hell of a fight. Enough of a fight that the thug had had to coldcock him with his Sig Sauer to save his own life. Mulder closed his eyes and offered thanks that the asshole hadn't just decided to shoot Alex and be done with him. After all, he definitely was going to need stitches for that face wound, and from the way he walked, a rib or two might be at least seriously bruised. Mulder wondered what injuries Alex had sustained in the fight, since he hadn't been there to see it. His eyes narrowed at the bootmarks on Alex's jacket, and he wondered if they had been put there before or after Alex had been knocked out.

"Fuck," he said under his breath. "I'm sorry, Krycek...Alex." Funny how he had no problems calling the man by his first name when he was too deeply unconscious to appreciate it. Mulder decided that that would be the first thing he would do to try to make amends to his former enemy.

Frowning, he decided he should be ready for anything. Leaning in close and stroking his hands through the dark, soft hair checking for head wounds and finding none, Mulder determined from the total lack of response that Alex was still deeply under. He quickly made his way out to his car, grabbed his emergency first aid kit, and came back in. He then grabbed another chair from the dark corner of the old building and dragged it up in front of Alex's to wait.

Mulder was slumped in the chair, his head lolling back, eyes closed, when a low, raspy groan brought him snapping to attention. He quickly sat up straight, blinking as he watched Alex drift back from his fugue.

The dark lashes fluttered against pale cheeks as Alex struggled to lift his head and his forehead creased as he groaned again in obvious pain. Mulder leaned in close and tried to make his expression gentle. It didn't seem to help as Alex suddenly widened his eyes and jerked his head back, realizing whose face was a few feet from his own.

"Wha...What the fuck?" He struggled to bring his hands around, hissing in pain as the cuffs cut into his wrist and he strained his bruised ribs.

"Shhh...easy, Alex." Mulder reached out to place a gently restraining hand on the other man's chest and Alex jerked back from the touch, eyes wide in fear and confusion. "I'm sorry," said Mulder in a low voice. "I didn't mean for you to get hurt. I just wanted to talk."

Alex's eyes narrowed and he stopped struggling, still breathing shallowly. His jaw clenched but he said nothing.

"He was just supposed to bring you here..." Mulder's voice lowered even further, "and restrain you, so I could get you to listen to me. I told him you weren't to be harmed."

Alex fixed him with an intense stare, face void of emotion now. "So talk. I'm listening." His voice was edged with sarcasm.

Mulder ignored the tone, leaning in to again take Alex's face in one hand, checking for injuries. Alex's breathing became louder as he jerked just once, then let Mulder's hand turn his face this way and that. "I'm sorry," said Mulder again, in a voice much softer than the first time. "I never meant to hurt you." His eyes met Alex's and he let the double meaning cross the electric current between them.

Alex swallowed hard and made his face impassive. "I'm fine. It's nothing I haven't been through with you before."

Mulder sighed again. "I know. But things are...different now..." He trailed off, never taking his hand from Alex's jaw. "Are you okay? I brought some supplies." He gestured with his head to the white tin on the floor beside them. "Where do you hurt?"

At this, Alex arched his eyebrows and his cracked lips turned up in a smirk. "Why? Are you going to make it all better?" This time his sarcasm was evident.

Mulder's own lips turned up in a half-grin and he gave Alex a slow look from head to toe and back again. "That was the plan, yes."

Alex's breath came out in a soft gasp and he swallowed again and looked away, the smirk gone, his face impassive.

Mulder saw the change and his own smile faded. "Listen, Alex. We need to talk. I don't want to play games any more." He sat back in his chair, giving the other man some space. "Why did you do it?"

Alex looked up at the softly spoken question, letting the ice in his eyes melt just slightly, still wary. "I told you," he half- whispered.

Mulder raked a hand back through his hair, leaving unruly spikes in his wake. He looked away, remembering the way Krycek had groaned his need into his ear, grinding against him. He felt his heart speed up and his groin swell. He swallowed and looked up at Alex from under lowered lids. "You said you needed me. What did you mean by that?"

Alex sighed, exasperated, and looked at the floor. "I think that's pretty fucking obvious, Mulder." He didn't look up, and Mulder studied the way his soft, bruised pink lips pursed as he blinked rapidly.

"No. It isn't." Mulder reached out again, gently lifting Alex's chin, and looked him straight in the face. Alex could do nothing to avoid the intensity of that gaze. "You said you needed me." Alex's eyes flickered at that, but he held steady. "What? What do you need from me?"

Alex frowned and swallowed, shifting uneasily in the chair, trying to look anywhere but at those burning hazel eyes. "Christ, Mulder," he finally replied, eyes squinting but unable to escape that stare. "I honestly don't know."

Mulder studied his face intently for a moment then nodded, pursing his lips in thought. "I guess that makes us even, then," he said, releasing Alex's jaw and leaning over to pick up the first aid kit. Alex watched warily as Mulder flipped open the tin and sorted through its contents, pulling out small packets and tubes.

"I'd uncuff you but I think that would just make this more awkward." Mulder's voice was barely audible. Alex's head nodded once just perceptibly in agreement. Mulder scooted his chair in closer, so that their knees were touching. He spread the supplies out on his legs, ripping open a small packet with his teeth and taking out a small white square with slightly trembling fingers.

He raised the antiseptic wipe to Alex's face and began gently cleaning away the blood and sweat and grime there. Alex closed his eyes and his face was tense, his breath panting out from between parted lips. As Mulder stroked over a smudge and discovered a cut underneath, Alex inhaled quickly and twitched a bit in pain.

"I'm sorry," Mulder murmured, leaning in closer, feeling the warm puffs of Alex's nervous breathing on his face.

"S'okay," Alex mumbled, keeping his eyes shut. Mulder listened to his loud, ragged breathing and felt his own chest rise and fall with his own accelerated respiration.

Mulder continued wiping Alex's face clean with the small cloth, stroking more gently over the soiled places, fearful of finding more hidden wounds. He studied the dark lashes laying against Alex's cheeks, fluttering as the eyes struggled to stay closed, as Alex struggled to trust Mulder not to hurt him. Mulder felt a tightening in his chest at the way Alex let him care for him, knowing firsthand what courage it took for he himself to let anyone take care of him. He'd never really considered the man's strength before. His resiliency to danger and his will to survive. Now he could see that Alex's passion extended to more than just staying alive. He obviously had a passion for living, and was willing to take risks for that, too. It made Mulder nearly breathless.

Now all of Alex's face was washed clean except his lips, which Mulder figured would be better off without the foul taste of antiseptic on them. They weren't dirty anyway...just slightly swollen and a bit cracked. Mulder had wiped away the blood with his thumb when it was fresh. He removed the traces of it from the pad of his thumb thoughtfully then dropped the little square to the floor. He picked up a tube of ointment and opened it, squeezing a dab onto the pad of his right ring finger, as he had seen Scully do so many times.

"This may sting a little," he murmured, slipping his left hand around the back of Alex's head to hold him in place. Alex said nothing, his breath now coming in short, hard pants. Mulder reached up and very gently smoothed some of the cool, clear gel on the worst of the cuts, watching Alex's facial muscles twitch at the discomfort and wanting to take it all away. "There," he said, his voice high and breathy. "I think we got them all." He dropped the tiny tube to the floor and the quiet tap it made as it hit was the only sound except for the breathing of the two men.

Alex's eyes were still shut, darting frantically beneath the lowered lids. Mulder looked at the false innocence created by those heavy, sensuous lashes and that turned up pixie nose. Without really thinking about it, he took Alex's jaw in his hand gently and leaned in to press his lips softly against that tempting mouth.

The little answering moaning whimper that resulted made him forget to be as gentle as he had planned and he pressed harder, licking against the cracked lips with his tongue, tasting blood for just a moment before they parted and swept him inside. Pulling Alex harder into the kiss with the hand in his hair, Mulder moaned fully into his mouth, probing and sucking and licking hungrily, Alex's tongue answering Mulder's stroke for stroke in a heated struggle for oral dominance.

He was no longer seated now, raising up out of the chair to press in closer to Alex, their mouths hungrily getting to know one another with quiet grunts and moans. The hand at Alex's jaw slid down his neck and shoulder, pushing the leather jacket down over the shoulder impatiently, then pushing its way into the collar of the black dress shirt underneath, desperate to feel skin. Mulder heard Alex murmur something against his lips and pulled back just enough to hear, without breaking contact completely.

"What?" he said, punctuating the question with another kiss.

"I said," mumbled Alex against Mulder's lips, "Uncuff me goddammit, so I can touch you."

Mulder smiled against his mouth. "Mmmm...I will, I will. But first, I think I owe you something." He pulled completely out of the kiss now, still holding the back of Alex's head with one hand and staring intently into his flushed and sweaty face. The other hand was brushing down Alex's abdomen to the waistband of his jeans, then lower, trailing softly over the straining bulge at his crotch.

Alex's breath left him in a tortured gasp and his hips thrust forward on the chair, pressing harder against Mulder's teasing hand. Mulder smiled and stroked over the bulge with the tips of his fingers, watching the agonized expression on Alex's face avidly. So beautiful to see him so tortured. He licked his lips and Alex blinked slowly.

"I hope we can do this with you in that chair," said Mulder, now frowning down at Alex's very tight black jeans with concentrated intent.

"Fuck, Mulder," growled Alex. "We can do it. We can do it!" He tried in vain to grind himself against Mulder, who only pulled his hands back far enough that they continued to just brush against the rock-hard erection seeking them.

Mulder nodded, struggling to steady his breathing so as to project an air of control. His face was serious as he switched hands, continuing to tease Alex, now scratching up and down through the denim with the fingernails of his left hand as his right worked the button of the fly. Alex was whimpering now and writhing, making the job a bit more difficult, but Mulder took his time and continued to work the small metal button with the fingers of one hand, while he worked Alex with the other. He got it loose, enjoying the squirming and moaning of the man under his touch, then stopped the torture long enough to carefully use both hands to unzip Alex's pants, reaching in and finally squeezing the hot, jumping cock within.

"Ooohhnnnngod Mulder..." moaned Alex, his hips lifted completely off the chair, his body rigid with need.

"Mmmmyeah, that's better," replied Mulder, using his lifted ass as an opportunity to jerk Alex's jeans and boxers down over his hips, freeing his bobbing erection. Mulder's voice was getting breathy again. "I think this is gonna work after all."

Alex said nothing, just whimpering as his hips undulated on and off the chair, seeking more of Mulder's touch. Taking pity on him, and unable to contain his own urges any longer, Mulder wrapped one hand firmly around the long, warm shaft and squeezed, grunting slightly as the arousal made his cock jump like it was the one receiving the attention. He gave himself one quick stroke through his dress slacks, then kicked the chair behind him back further, out of the way, going to his knees. His hand still around Alex's now weeping cock, he settled in with his other hand gripping Alex's hip, his thumb stroking up and down the ridge of bone there. He looked up into Alex's fluttering eyes, biting his lower lip.

"I've never done this before," he said quietly, suddenly a bit embarrassed. "I'm not going to be as good as you."

"Uuhhnnngod Mulder," gasped Alex, looking down incredulously into the hazel eyes fixed on him, "Anything you do to me is going to be fucking amazing. Just get those pouty lips around my cock and shut up."

Mulder grinned, showing teeth. "How am I gonna get my lips around your cock if I shut up?" he asked, at the same time leaning toward the other man's twitching member, sliding his hand down to grip it firmly at the base.

Alex's smartass reply was lost in an open-mouthed groan as Mulder opened that sarcastic mouth of his and took in as much of Alex's cock as he could, swishing his tongue against it firmly all the way down.

"Oh fuck! Fuck! Mulder!" Alex's hips jumped on the chair, thrusting him more deeply into Mulder's slurping, humming mouth. Mulder gagged and jerked back a bit, but kept Alex deep in his mouth, swallowing and smacking and struggling to breathe as he worked his head up and down, trying to mimic what Alex had so expertly done to him. Absently, he wondered if the amateurish wet sounds would turn Alex off, but as he listened to the desperate grunts and groans above him and struggled to stay in control of the cock trying to jam its way down his throat, he supposed not. He pulled back, sucking the tip noisily for a moment before letting it pop free of his drooling mouth.

He licked his lips noisily. "I wanna make it good for you," he said, panting. "Tell me what to do."

"Jesus! Fuck! Mulder! Just get back down there! You were doing fine!" Alex writhed on the chair, cursing the cuffs and pushing his hips into the other man's face.

"Are you sure?" Mulder asked, extending his tongue and running it quickly back and forth just under the head of Alex's cock the way he remembered Alex doing to him.

"Gah! Fuck! Yeah!" Alex cried out eloquently, struggling to push between those infuriatingly still-speaking lips.

Mulder closed his lips around Alex's shaft once more and applied suction, drawing him in hard, feeling his teeth scrape lightly against the silky flesh and struggling to remember if Alex had let his teeth graze him. Alex didn't seem to be complaining, but Mulder couldn't remember anything but swirling hot tongue and lips and throat from that night, so he stretched his lips over his teeth and continued fucking his head up and down on Alex's cock, working his tongue whenever his brain would let him remember to. He wondered if it would take Alex a long time to come this way, since he really didn't know what he was doing, and couldn't really use his finger the way Alex had, what with the chair in the way and all. He needn't have worried.

Alex's moans and whimpers turned into gasping sobs, and Mulder was vaguely disquieted by how much they sounded like the ones Alex had made in the past when Mulder had hit him. This was an infinitely better way to have him at his mercy, thought Mulder, gasping for breath and swallowing the saliva that was building up in his mouth. It was a total head trip in fact, and Mulder moaned as his own cock surged in his pants, wanting to get in on the fun.

The moan reverberated against Alex's cockhead at the back of his throat and before he knew what was happening, it was suddenly, erratically, ramming itself roughly against the sensitive tissue there, a hot, salty, thick liquid spreading around the thrusting flesh, drooling out the sides of his mouth as he struggled not to choke on the force of Alex's orgasm. As he screwed his eyes shut and forced himself to swallow and not just pull off spitting, he registered the loud cry coming from the throat of the man above him.

"NNnnngahhh! Ahhh! AhhhhhhhhhgodfuckMulder!" Alex's head was thrown back, his voice a broken roar echoing through the empty warehouse. Mulder kept his mouth moving, struggling to take a breath between thrusts. As Alex came down off his climax, he continued to cry out, but the sound resembled a cross between laughter and sobs now. Mulder struggled not to gag against the strange, bitter, slick substance coating his mouth and pulled back off the twitching, slightly deflated member with a slurping smack. He made himself quickly swallow several times, washing the strange taste away. He looked up into Alex's face, which was still thrown back toward the ceiling, eyes closed.

"You okay?" asked Mulder quietly, worried by the strange sobbing noises.

"Ahhhahaha...Mulder...god...okay...god..." Alex opened his eyes and let his head loll back around to face Mulder.

Mulder grinned, wiping his mouth with the back of his hand. "So I did all right?" he asked, eyebrows raised with genuine curiosity.

"What are you, stupid?" Alex finally answered, chuffing out an exhausted laugh. "I don't know if I've *ever* come that hard before in my life."

Mulder grinned proudly. "Well I guess that makes us even again," he said, getting up into a standing position. He gazed down at Alex, who looked up and grinned in reply.

Mulder stepped back then, giving his back a stretch.

"Uh...you're not going to leave now are you?" asked Alex, frowning slightly.

Mulder made his face serious. "Yeah, I think I'm done here."

Alex's face schooled itself into the familiar blank expression, and Mulder immediately felt sorry for teasing him. He smiled warmly. "Wanna ride back to my place?"

Alex looked up quickly, eyes warming once more. He smirked and gave Mulder a mock glare.

"Well yeah, since I don't even know where the hell we are and my damned car is back at the bar." His grin was all happy little boy and made Mulder's smile widen in response.

He reached into his pocket and fished out a small silver key, tilting his head and giving Alex a measuring look. "If I let you out of those, are you going to be good?"

Alex's eyes gleamed and his smile turned dark, dangerous, and wild. "Mulder, you have no idea."

Mulder huffed out a nervous laugh, his teeth gleaming once more in a full smile. "In that case..." He left his comment unfinished, kneeling once more on the floor, now behind the chair, and carefully unlocking the cuffs.

The prosthetic arm swung forward to Alex's side and he brought the real one around in front, grimacing, flexing it and shaking it to rid himself of the cramping and pins and needles. This is the point where you would take your wrist in your hand and rub it, thought Mulder, his eyes squinting a bit as he realized Alex was unable to perform that small self-comforting behavior. He crouched beside Alex and reached up, squeezing his way down the flexing arm, feeling the hard muscles bunch under his touch.

"I'm sorry," he said once again, now taking Alex's wrist lightly in his hands and smoothing over the abrasions there, looking up into Alex's face.

Alex's head tilted and his eyes were warm, his lids heavy. "You're really something, you know that?"

"What?" asked Mulder, still stroking over the maligned wrist, which was now limp in his two-handed grasp.

"You've beaten the shit out of me, Mulder, and cuffed me a lot worse than this numerous times." His tone was warm, not accusing.

Mulder sighed deeply and looked down at their hands. "I know. I'm sorry, Alex."

"Stop it," replied Alex, turning his hand in Mulder's in order to grasp it. "I didn't mean to bring up the bad stuff between us." His eyes were serious now as he tried to get Mulder to look at him again. It wasn't working, so Alex gently removed his hand from Mulder's and it was his turn to reach out and pull Mulder's chin up so that he could look him in the face.

"Mulder, we have a lot of shit between us," he began, and Mulder's hands flexed on Alex's thighs but he said nothing, still kneeling in front him. "I've done stuff, and you've done stuff, and still, somehow...we're here." His voice was soft and his thumb stroked along Mulder's jaw.

Mulder sighed again, turning just slightly into Alex's touch. He nodded. "Yeah, I guess when I said we're even, I was talking about more than a mind-blowing orgasm." One side of his lips quirked up and Alex answered it with a full smile. Mulder smiled back, then let his gaze trail down over Alex's chest to his prosthetic arm, which still hung limply at his side. "I'm sorry about that," he said, his voice barely above a whisper. "It almost happened to me, too. I can't imagine..."

Alex's smile tightened. "We've both lost a lot, Mulder, but I don't really want to talk about that now." Mulder nodded, and Alex's smile warmed again. Hey, did you say something about a ride to your place?"

Mulder laughed. "Yeah I did. Let's get going before my shorts explode." He stood and reached down, helping a laughing Alex to his feet. As Alex gained his balance, straightening slowly against the pain of his bruises, Mulder became serious. Instead of apologizing yet again, he pulled Alex in close, one hand around his waist, one around his shoulders. He held him gently, the two men eye to eye, not saying anything, just breathing together. Alex's arm came around to rest on Mulder's hips. He gave Mulder's ass a squeeze to lighten the moment, and Mulder smiled and pressed his erection into Alex's crotch with a quiet grunt. Alex tilted his head just slightly, compensating for Mulder's sizable olfactory organ, then leaned in and pressed his lips gently against the other man's, sighing into the soft kiss.

Mulder moaned quietly, his own need yet unassuaged, but he kept the kiss slow and gentle, just stroking around Alex's lips with his tongue, feeling the other man melt against him, into him, amazingly passive and gentle. Their tongues lovingly caressed each other as they each pressed the other harder into the embrace, hands stroking and rubbing and gently squeezing. Mulder's moans became frustrated whimpers and he broke the kiss, gasping.

"God, Alex, I don't want to do this in this filthy warehouse but I'm not gonna make it if we don't get out of here *now.*" He ground his painfully erect cock against Alex's answering firmness for emphasis, gritting his teeth.

Alex kissed his lips chastely, then his nose, making it wrinkle, causing Alex to laugh and do it again. "Let's go then, Mulder. So I can show you what I've wanted to do to you since the first day I walked into the FBI bullpen."

Mulder's eyebrows rose at that but he grinned and slid his hand down Alex's arm, grabbing his hand and yanking him out of the warehouse, pulling him along behind him, stumbling to keep up, as he dragged him to his car. He let go long enough to unlock the door and Alex laughed again.

"You locked your car?"

Mulder grinned sheepishly. "Well, ya never know what kind of seedy element you're gonna find around these warehouses."

"Indeed." Alex's eyebrows arched and he smirked as Mulder went around to his side of the car and quickly got in. He lowered himself into the seat and pulled the door shut. "Kidnappers, rogue FBI agents, murderous double-crossing triple-agent Consortium thugs..." he looked sideways at that and laughed again at the shocked, blank look on Mulder's face. He kept his amused gaze straight ahead.

Mulder shook his head and started the car, and music filled the interior. Mulder glanced over at Alex, whose smile had widened to show his rarely seen, straight, white teeth.

"This is my favorite CD, Mulder," he said, still looking out the front windshield and grinning.

"Mine too," answered Mulder, glancing over at him with a smile, before stepping on the gas and throwing dirt and rocks up as he fishtailed his way out of the parking lot. The Barenaked Ladies were pounding his speakers so loud the seats were vibrating, and he couldn't help but move his lips to the song, mouthing the incredibly familiar lyrics.

***

Falling For the First Time
by Barenaked Ladies

I'm so cool, too bad I'm a loser
I'm so smart, too bad I can't get anything figured out
I'm so brave, too bad I'm a baby
I'm so fly, that's probably why it
Feels just like I'm falling for the first time

I'm so green, it's really amazing
I'm so clean, too bad I can't get all the dirt off of me.
I'm so sane, it's driving me crazy
It's so strange, I can't believe it
Feels just like I'm falling for the first time

Anyone perfect must be lying, anything easy has its cost
Anyone plain can be lovely, anyone loved can be lost
What if I lost my direction? What if I lost sense of time?
What if I nursed this infection? Maybe the worst is behind
It feels just like I'm falling for the first time
It feels just like I'm falling for the first time

I'm so chill, no wonder it's freezing
I'm so still, I just can't keep my fingers out of anything
I'm so thrilled to finally be failing
I'm so done, turn me over cause it
Feels just like I'm falling for the first time

Anything plain can be lovely, anything loved can be lost
Maybe I lost my direction, what if our love is the cost?
Anyone perfect must be lying, anything easy has its cost
Anyone plain can be lovely, anyone loved can be lost
What if I lost my direction? What if I lost sense of time?
What if I nursed this infection? Maybe the worst is behind