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Peja's Wonderful World of Makebelieve Import
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Published:
2020-11-05
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3,387
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Don't Give Up

Summary:

Jim and Blair are fighting like they never have before. Will this be the end of their relationship?

Work Text:

Don't Give Up
By PattRose
Summary: Jim and Blair are fighting like they never have before. Will this be the end of their relationship?
Warnings: Angst and language
Rating: Teen
Genre: Slash, established relationship
Word count: 3327

 

 photo dontgiveup_zpson9rxlco.jpg

 

The silence between the two lovers was deafening. Everything seemed louder suddenly to Jim and he didn't want to hear Blair's increased heart rate, he didn't want to hear little hitches in his breath and he sure didn't want to hear the loneliness that seemed to be hanging like a cloud over both of them.

It had all started at the station house that night. Jim saw Blair kiss someone and it wasn't him. Yes, he had been drinking, but can everyone blame that on drinking? Jim thought not. He thought they had been happy. They seemed to be happy. Blair had showed no signs of wanting out of the relationship, but yet there he was at a party in front of other people, kissing a woman. They were plastered together like glue.

Jim looked over at Blair who was very quiet since they had started the discussion. Jim feared that Blair did want out and just didn't know how to do it without hurting him. Jim knew they were going to have to discuss it since they were finally at the loft, away from the station. He had thought Megan was going to kill Blair. It's not just me. She thought it was odd too. Megan was the only person in the bullpen that knew about them so far. Jim was planning on telling Simon in the next few weeks, but he wasn't hurrying. He was truly dreading the coming out part. All the rest of it, he loved, but the coming out part scared the crap out of him.

Jim sat down on the sofa and sighed loudly. Blair still hadn't moved from the doorway of the apartment. "Blair, come inside and shut the door. We need to talk."

Blair moved into the house, shutting the door behind him. Then he walked towards the sofa and just stood there, looking lost.

"Sit down across from me. I don't want you by me right now, Blair. Would you like to tell me what is going on?"

Blair sat on the coffee table, not even thinking about the house rules and put his head in his hands.

After about ten minutes, Jim said, "Well, I guess that's the end of us. I thought you would have at least something to say, but since you don't, I'm leaving."

"Jim, don't leave. I'm so fucking sorry..."

"I'm so fucking sorry isn't going to cut it tonight. I need much more than that to keep me here."

"Don't give up, Jim."

"Why? You did. You showed me just how important I really was to you by kissing Melissa Gibson. Of all people, Melissa? You know she's got a thing for you. You know it drove me insane with jealousy and yet you still kissed her. I can't imagine anything you say helping this."

"You already gave up didn't you?" Blair asked, the sound of defeat hovering low in the room.

"Yes, I did give up. I don't share. I won't share and I don't know that I could ever trust you again. I can't even begin to talk about forgiving you yet."

Blair rushed to the bathroom just in time to throw up what little dinner he had in him. When he was done, he started having dry heaves. Oh the joys of being a jerk.

Jim normally would have been next to him making sure he was all right. But not tonight. Blair was on his own tonight. Jim was so angry at him, he could hardly see straight.

Blair finally came walking out with a cold wash cloth against his forehead and running it over his mouth from time to time. "I'm not making excuses, but Jim I'd like you to test my drink from tonight. I only had one drink, not even one. About half of one and the next thing I knew we were kissing. I swear to you, it wasn't planned and I don't want her kissing me."

Jim pulled his cell out and called Megan Connor.

"Connor..."

"Megan, is Blair's drink still sitting on the desk by my desk?"

"Yes, why?" she asked.

"Could you take it down to Dan Wolf and have him analyze it for us. I think Blair might have been drugged tonight."

"Oh for God's sake, Jim, he was kissing her. What would make me him do that?" Megan asked angrily.

"I don't know. That's the point. I'm not saying I believe it to be true, I'm just saying it could be true. He said he only has a sip of a drink and then next thing he knew he was kissing her."

"I'll do it right now. I see Dan at the end of the hall, I'll catch up with him. For Sandy's sake, I hope he was drugged, or he's going to have a lot of explaining to do."

Jim wiped his hand across his face, with sadness, tension and exhaustion. "Call me with whatever you find out, Megan and thank you." Jim closed his cell and looked at Blair. "Are you all right?"

"No, I'm not all right? Someone fucking drugged me and you think I'm making it up?"

Blair raced for the bathroom once more and began a new round of puking a lung up. Jim knew he hadn't had that much to drink. Why would he be puking so much?

Jim heard Blair's body fall to the floor and his head smack the tile. Jim rushed to his side and asked, "Chief, are you still with me here?"

Blair was totally unconscious. Jim dialed 911 and told them to come at once. He made Blair comfortable on the floor with towels under his head and went to open up the front door. Jesus, what if she drugged him and he had some type of reaction to it? Jim kept track of his blood pressure and his breathing and noticed that both were getting lower. When the EMTs walked in, Jim was ready for them to take over.

"What do we have here, Jim?" Chad asked.

"I think he might have been drugged or poisoned. He's been acting strangely all evening long. And then he couldn't stop puking.

Chad and his partner, Marlene got Blair onto the stretcher and put the oxygen on him right away.

"Jim, we need all the room in the back, so you follow us in your truck," Marlene said, calmly.

"I know the drill, Marlene. Thank you. Take good care of him."

Jim closed up the loft, got in his truck and started his way to the hospital. He flipped on his lights and siren to get him through traffic. While driving he called Megan.

"Have you heard anything yet?" Jim asked. "The reason I ask is Blair is on his way to the hospital right now. He's had some reaction or something to something. Did Dan find anything?"

"Oh my God, and I was so mean to him tonight. Here is Dan, let him fill you in."

"Hi Jim, what is happening?" Dan asked, using his calming voice.

"I think Blair was given something tonight and he had a reaction to it. Do you know anything yet?" Jim asked, hurriedly.

"It's Rohypnol and he had a large dose. I can see why he's having a reaction. But he's not out of the woods yet, Jim. Sometimes it affects the blood pressure, the memory and causes confusion. Try and be patient with him when he comes around. And Megan told me about you and Blair. This wasn't his fault at all. I got prints off the cup. They belonged to Melissa Gibson, so Simon has been notified and is contacting Rafe and Brown right now for the arrest. If the doctor needs me for anything, give him my cell phone number, Jim. Take good care of him and take it easy on Miss Gibson."

"Thank you, Dan. I'll see you later." Jim set his phone on the bench seat of the truck and wanted to scream. Blair could have died earlier and Jim was too focused on himself to even notice that Blair's vitals were off by a long shot. Jim was never going to forgive himself for this. And if he had his way, Gibson was going to be put in prison for attempted murder.

 

*

 

When Jim arrived at the hospital, Simon was already there waiting for him.

"How did you beat me here?" Jim asked.

"I was close by and didn't have to go very far. Dan filled me in on what's happening, now we just need to see what the doctor here says."

"Jesus... I wasn't paying any attention to his vitals at all. Instead I was worried about my poor ego, with Blair kissing someone else. And he could die from this, Simon."

"Hold on a moment. You and the kid are a couple?" Simon was a little surprised. Yeah, sure he knew they were close, but not that close.

"Does that change things for you, Simon?" Jim asked in a not that friendly tone.

"Hey, you're the one with the secret, don't use that tone with me. I'm just surprised. I mean, I knew you were best friends, but when did this happen?"

"We've been together for about six months now." Jim knew he needed to keep calm and focus on Blair, not Simon.

Jim told the nurse who he was and what he was there for. The nurse named, Sandi said, "Sit down in the waiting room and I'll have the doctor call for you when it's time to go back."

Jim was going to argue, but Simon grabbed his arm and pulled him over to the waiting room which was empty for a change. Jim was glad of that.

"Sit down, Jim and tell me why you didn't tell me about the two of you. I thought we were friends."

"I wanted it to be just us for a while. It was bad enough that Megan knew. Blair let it slip one night while we were out having a drink with her. She's kept it very quiet and we had planned on talking to you next week. I'm sorry, Simon."

Jim stood up suddenly and said, "Blair's heart just stopped and they had to start it again."

Simon pulled him down into the chair and said, "We can't let anyone hear that, Jim. Take it easy and let the doctor do his job. They'll call you when it's time."

Megan walked into the emergency room waiting room and sat next to Jim. She patted his hand and said, "Melissa Gibson has been arrested for attempted murder. So she might not even get bail. With any luck they'll keep her in there all night long so she can think about it."

"Think about it? Blair's heart just stopped, Megan. I'm not worried about her right now. I'm fucking worried about Blair. I'm going to stay good and focused on him so that I won't leave and kill her."

"Oh my God, have you seen him yet? Jesus, what's taking so long?" she asked, tearfully.

Simon said, "Connor, you need to stay strong for both Blair and Jim. Don't fall apart on me now."

"I was so fucking mean to him tonight. I said terrible things that I'll never be able to take back," Megan said, sadly.

Jim put his arm around her shoulders and held her close to him. "It makes two of us, Megan. I should have known something was wrong right away. But no, I was too busy feeling sorry for myself and not paying attention."

"Detective Jim Ellison?" A man called out.

All three of them stood up and walked towards the man in the white coat.

"Your partner has been given an ungodly dose of Rohypnol and we think we finally have him stabilized. You can come back as long as you don't upset him. But only you. Your friends will have to wait until he gets a room upstairs. I'm Doctor Reynolds, by the way. I'll be his doctor the entire time he's in here."

Simon and Megan went back to the chairs and sat down as Jim walked into the back with the doctor.

When Jim walked in, he was a little surprised at how Blair looked. He was awake, but seemed out of it. His skin was so pale, he looked like he was as white as a sheet. Jim walked over to Blair and kissed him on the forehead. Blair opened his eyes and smiled.

"You didn't give up did you?" Blair whispered.

"I would never give you on you, Chief, never."

The doctor brought a chair and told him to get comfy because it was going to be hours before they could move him up to a room.

Jim sat in the chair and held Blair's hand.

"What happened tonight, Jim? I remember saying, ‘don't give up', but I don't remember why."

"It doesn't matter right now, babe. Just relax and close your eyes and rest."

Jim began to talk to Blair. He told the younger man how much he meant to him and how life would always be complicated with it came to the two of them. But they were still worth it.

Jim was watching the monitor and saw that Blair's blood pressure was getting better and so was his pulse. Jim was so relieved that his mate was going to be all right.

"Chief, Simon and Megan are in the waiting room. They're waiting for you to get a room so they can see you for themselves. Of course, Megan is upset. But Simon is downright pissed off."

Blair opened up his eyes again and said, "What did I do to make him angry?"

"Someone drugged you, Blair. You didn't do anything. Relax. Close your eyes and rest."

 

*

 

Simon and Megan were still sitting there four hours later when the doctor came out and said, "You can see him in his room now. He's in room 534. Try not to upset him. He's had quite the night."

"Thank you, Doctor," Megan said, shaking his hand and almost running for the elevator.

 

*

 

When they walked in, Jim was sound asleep in the chair, but Blair was looking out the window, wide awake.

Megan walked in and hugged him close and softly said, "I'm so glad you're okay, Sandy."

"Let's not wake Jim up. He's been so stressed out and I want him to sleep," Blair whispered.

"Are you feeling better?" Simon whispered.

Jim woke up before Blair could answer. "Hey. He's supposed to be sleeping."

"I couldn't sleep, Jim. I'm sorry."

Blair looked so pitiful that Jim's heart just about broke. "Chief, don't be sorry, just take it easy. I'm not mad."

"But Jim, I actually remember what I did last night. I don't know how you can even look at me."

Megan hugged him close and said, "It was the drug. Some people die from exposure to this drug. You're damn lucky that Jim got you to the hospital as fast as he did."

Blair smiled at Jim in thanks.

"Don't thank me, Chief. Because of me, you almost died. I didn't listen to what you were saying or doing. I was too focused on feeling sorry for myself."

"Jim, could you hold me?" Blair asked tears welling up in his eyes.

Jim practically knocked Megan off the bed, sat down and took Blair into his arms. "I love you, Blair. Never forget that."

Simon cleared his throat and said, "I hate to break up this hug-fest, but I need to take your statement, Sandburg."

"I'm ready when you are," Blair pointed out.

"Are you certain that Melissa Gibson gave you the drink that made you sick?"

"Yes, sir. First of all, it had a very odd taste to it. That's why I only drank a small portion of the drink. But it was enough to affect me. It was like I had no control and then I started to get sicker and sicker."

"Why do you think she did that to you, Blair?" Simon asked, gently.

"She's been asking me out for about three months now and doesn't want to take no for an answer. She touches me, rubs by me and just makes me uncomfortable when I'm around her. She told me three days ago that I would be very sorry if I didn't go out with her."

"Did you by any chance see her put the substance in the drink?" he asked.

"No, why? Is she going to go free?"

"We can't prove that she didn't just give you punch instead of spiked punch. This might be hard to prove."

Jim stood up and started to pace. "Did you find any on her when you picked her up? How about at her house?" Jim needed these questions answered.

"We have a search warrant for her house, her car and her office at the station. If it's there, we'll find it."

Simon's phone went off and he walked out into the hallway to take the call.

"Don't you worry, Sandy. She'll never get close to you again," Megan promised.

"Don't you do anything stupid, Megan. And you either, Jim," Blair ordered.

"I'm going to behave myself, because if I went after her, she'd be dead," Jim said.

Simon walked in the door before Blair could answer Jim. "Good news, Blair. She admitted to spiking the punch. Said she had no idea it would make you sick and make you almost die. She doesn't want you to have to go to court, so she'll plea bargain. They're talking about giving her 18 months, probation, and suspension from her job and has to do two months of community service of Blair's choice. What do you think, everyone?"

Megan was the first to answer. "I think it sucks. She's basically going to walk. What a little bitch."

Blair sighed and said, "I'll think up a really good community service for her. She won't know what hit her."

Jim leaned down and kissed Blair. "I'm sorry, Chief. I wish I would have been paying closer attention to you during the party."

Simon decided to make everyone feel a little better. "It's none of your fault. It's hers. She's to blame, not us. So everyone stop feeling guilty. We had no idea that this was going on underneath our noses and Blair didn't inform us of any of it."

"Sorry, Simon. I didn't want people to think I couldn't handle it by myself."

"Chief, now you see what happens when you go off on your own. We need each other. This is what friends and lovers are for. From now on, we talk about things."

"Got cha," Blair answered, smiling at last.

Blair yawned and laid back on his pillow and closed his eyes.

Megan said, "Goodnight, Sandy. Sleep well. I'll see you tomorrow."

"Night, Megan. Thank you for your support."

"I'll talk to you tomorrow, Jim and Blair. Sleep well, both of you," Simon said as he walked out the doorway.

"Night, Simon," Blair called out.

Jim flipped the switch and the lights were dimmed to almost nothing. "Need to go to the bathroom, Chief?"

"As a matter of fact, I do. Don't tell me you can tell," Blair said, eyes big as saucers.

"These senses are really good sometimes, Chief."

Jim helped him in the bathroom and then got him tucked in bed. Jim pulled his chair over to Blair's bed and lay his head on the side of Blair's leg. Jim knew he would have a pinched neck tomorrow, but there was no way he was leaving Blair. He was never giving up.

The end