Chapter Text
As Crowley took his mouth Sam kissed the demon back. Truthfully his mind wasn't really into it this time. In all the times they had been together it had always been him topping Crowley. Crowley had never once shown the slightest interest in topping him. Sam's mind was busy over-thinking the reasons why Crowley wouldn't want to be in him. He wasn't stupid, he knew he was an over-thinker, he just couldn't stop himself.
"Moose?"
And that was another thing. Crowley had stopped calling him Moose anywhere outside of the bedroom. Truthfully Sam missed the nickname. He just couldn't put his feelings into words yet. He always analyzed everything before he talked about it.
"Is something wrong?"
"Why don't you want to top me," Sam blurted out suddenly.
Crowley blinked several times. "Um… What?"
"In all the times we've been together you've never shown the slightest interest of being the top in this. Is it me? Am I doing something wrong? I mean, is there something I can do to make you want to be in me or…" Sam ran a hand through his hair. "Damn it!" This was why he thought everything through thoroughly.
"Oh Sam," Crowley whispered. "I'm sorry."
Sam frowned. "Sorry?"
"I didn't realize you were feeling that way. I told you from the beginning that everything we did was your choice. I figured if you wanted to bottom you would have told me. I'm sorry I wasn't clear enough."
"Wait." Sam propped himself up on his elbows. "You were just waiting for me to ask?"
"Yes."
"That's it?"
"Yes."
"Really?"
Crowley sighed and lay back against the bed staring at the ceiling. "I love you Sam. I told you, 'we do what you want, how you want, when you want to do it'. I didn't mean just that once. I meant every time. It's my fault. I wasn't clear enough. Gods Sam do you know how long I've wanted you that way?"
Sam blushed, he couldn't help it. "So…"
Crowley turned to face him. "Is that what you want tonight?"
Sam hesitated. As much as it bothered him that Crowley was always the bottom he wasn't sure if he was ready to try it. Honestly the thought still made him nervous.
"Some other time, then. I'm just happy I can be with you anyway I can have you."
"No," Sam insisted. "Tonight."
"You're not ready."
"Excuse you?"
"I mean you're having doubts, Sam, that's all."
"Of course I'm having doubts Crowley. I've never done it before. I'm going to keep having doubts until I actually do it."
"I will never push you Sam."
"You're not, I just need to do this."
Crowley frowned.
"What," Sam asked.
"Why do you 'need' to do this?"
Sam sought for a good answer.
"If you're pushing yourself because you think I want you to do this then don't. I don't ever want you to feel pressured."
"I'm not pushing myself because of that. I just… I need to do this some time and I trust you."
"It doesn't have to be right now."
"I don't know if I'll have the nerve later."
"Then we should wait. If you're not sure-"
"No! Tonight. I need this."
"As you wish, my love."
Crowley propped himself up on one elbow and leaned in to kiss Sam gently. Moving slowly Crowley straddled him and finally broke the kiss. "Sam?"
"Yeah?"
"You know you can say stop any time you want?"
"I don't want to. I want this."
Crowley kissed him gently again. "For now you do. If you change your mind I want you to know you can stop this at any time."
Sam nodded. "Understood."
"Any time."
"Yes, said I understood."
"Good. Now lay back and let me take care of you."
Sam shifted his arms so that he was no longer propped up on his elbows. For the longest time all Crowley did was kiss him and run his hands over Sam's arms and chest. Sam was almost ready to shove the demon off of him when Crowley nipped his earlobe and sucked on it. Sam arched in pleasure. His nervousness was slowly starting to ease. Crowley's hand moved down to play with his cock and Sam groaned.
"God yes," Sam moaned as his eyes slid shut.
"So beautiful," Crowley whispered. "Mine."
"All yours," Sam moaned back.
Crowley released Sam's earlobe and swirled his tongue over it. Moving down Crowley nipped at Sam's neck until he reached the junction where his neck branched into his shoulder. Biting lightly Crowley sucked at the skin while running his tongue across it. Damn, that felt good. Slowly Crowley increased the pressure of the bite. When the pressure became too much Sam tensed and Crowley released the skin.
"Shh love. Testing the pressure is all."
Sam nodded.
"More," Crowley asked.
"More," Sam agreed.
Licking over the skin from his previous bite Crowley moved to the other side of Sam's neck and nipped the skin several times. Each time Sam tensed anticipating a bite that never came. Tilting his head upwards Crowley sucked on Sam's right earlobe grazing his teeth across it, and occasionally his tongue. Sam let himself relax into Crowley's careful ministrations once again. After several minutes Crowley moved to kiss him again.
Moving lower Crowley licked at the hollow in the base of Sam's neck. Dragging his tongue downward Crowley made his way to Sam's left nipple. As the demon sucked on the nipple Sam began to shift. His need was growing faster and faster. Crowley released Sam's left nipple and Sam groaned in annoyance. When Crowley descended on his right nipple Sam's hips bucked upward against the demon involuntarily.
"Mmm," Crowley moaned. "That's my Moose."
"God, Crowley."
"Demon," Crowley reminded him playfully.
Sam lifted his right hand and smacked the demon's ass.
"You know what I meant."
Crowley merely chuckled and released his nipple. Running his hands over Sam's chest Crowley made his way lower. Placing light kisses all the way down Crowley made his way to Sam's groin. Sam tensed as Crowley lowered his head once again. Instead of touching his cock Crowley placed light kisses on the inside of Sam's left thigh.
The intimate gesture still made Sam nervous but eventually he found himself relaxing into the kisses. Crowley switched to the right thigh treating it every bit as reverently as every other part of Sam's body he had touched. Sam found himself becoming less and less self conscious about having another man between his legs. Moving back upward Crowley gripped Sam's left shoulder and tugged lightly.
"Turn for me, Sam," Crowley whispered.
Sam turned over and instantly became more self conscious. He was naked, exposed and unable to see what was coming or defend himself in this position. It made him extremely antsy.
"Shh, my love. You're safe."
Reaching up Crowley massaged Sam's shoulder muscles.
"I will never hurt you. You're safe, my love."
"Mmm, feels good."
"I'm glad," Crowley answered.
Crowley continued the massage down Sam's back, pausing every so often to work on a specific group of muscles. Slowly he made his way down to Sam's hips. Crowley began to lightly massage Sam's ass
and Sam tensed once more.
"Sam?"
"Hmm?"
Crowley's hands moved to massage the underside of his ass cheeks.
"I love you."
"Love you too," Sam murmured with his face pressed against the bed.
Crowley ran a finger lightly down the crack of Sam's ass. Sam stiffened slightly.
"Thank you for everything."
"Welcome," Sam replied.
Crowley ran his finger down the crack a second time pressing slightly at his hole.
"We can stop any time you want."
"No," Sam stated adamantly.
Crowley ran his finger over Sam's hole once more with a touch more pressure.
"I would never hurt you."
"I know."
A finger pressed into his ass and Sam froze.
"Shh, love. Just relax and it'll be easier. Promise."
Sam tried but he couldn't force himself to relax.
"Sam?"
Sam whined slightly and Crowley withdrew the finger.
"No. I can do this."
Crowley began massaging Sam's lower back once again.
"I know you can. You're just too tense right now. You have to relax, okay?"
Sam nodded.
"You've got this. All you need to do is relax, okay?"
Sam nodded once more.
Slowly Crowley moved his hands down Sam's ass. Taking his right hand Crowley rubbed a finger against Sam's hole again. "It's just me Sam. I won't hurt you, you know that, right?"
Sam nodded once again fighting his muscles to keep them from tensing. When Crowley inserted the finger again his muscled locked. He couldn't help it.
"Shh, love. It's just me. You're safe, no one is going to hurt you."
"Crowley?"
"Yes?"
Sam clenched his jaw shut. He could do this. All he had to do was relax.
"I love you Moose," Crowley whispered.
For some reason the use of his nickname helped more than anything else. Sam took a deep breath and finally relaxed. It wasn't actually as bad as he had envisioned. It was… Sam searched for a way to describe how it felt. Odd, he finally decided. It felt odd.
"That's my Moose," Crowley whispered kissing Sam's lower back.
Slowly the finger started moving farther inward. As Sam began to tense once more as the finger began moving outward. Sam did his best to remain relaxed as Crowley continued moving the finger in and out, in and out slowly. Every so often Crowley would pull lightly against the side of his hole. He always returned to the slow in and outs before Sam could tense at the slight pulling feeling.
"Mmm," Sam hummed.
"Just like that, Moose. You're so beautiful."
"Mmm," Sam hummed again.
After a while Crowley added a second finger and Sam tensed up once more. Crowley didn't move the fingers immediately. Reaching up he ran a hand over over Sam's back whispering to him. After some time Sam finally relaxed. Finally Crowley began moving the fingers. Sam tried to analyze how this felt. Not much different then with one finger. Just slightly more pressure is all, he decided.
"There's a good Moose," Crowley whispered still rubbing Sam's back with his other hand. "Mine?"
"Yours," Sam agreed.
As Crowley moved the fingers in and out he began scissoring them open and closed. Sam lowered his brows as he focused on just the feeling. Definitely not as bad as he had anticipated. The relief that maybe this might not be that bad helped relax him further. Surprisingly this was actually nicer than he had thought it would be.
"Sam?"
"Moose," Sam muttered against the mattress.
"Moose," Crowley stated affectionately. "I'm going to add a third finger. Okay?"
"Mmm."
"I'd like a more definitive answer, please."
"Mmm, 'k," Sam murmured.
"Is that a yes?"
"Mmm."
Crowley continued massaging Sam's lower back with his left hand as he added the third finger. Sam didn't tense up half as much as he had with the others.
"Mmm, feels good," he muttered.
"Glad," Crowley told him. "It'll feel even better soon."
Sam hummed once more and continued focusing on the feeling of Crowley's fingers inside of him.
"That's my good Moose," Crowley murmured.
As the fingers moved in and out slowly Sam found himself pressing back against them slightly. Every so often Crowley would spread them apart as he moved them. The pressure from the fingers was actually becoming enjoyable. Sam hummed again as he rocked back onto the fingers once more.
"Yes, just like that Moose."
"Mmm, mine."
"All yours, love," Crowley answered. "Always."
Crowley began humming softly as he continued to finger him. Sam began to relax more and more. After a while he couldn't remember why he'd been so nervous about this. This was definitely better than he had ever anticipated.
"Crowley?"
Crowley froze.
"Love you," Sam muttered against the mattress.
The fingers started moving again. "Love you too, Sam. Sam?"
"Hm?"
"Are you ready for this?"
"Bit late to ask that," Sam answered still rocking against Crowley's fingers.
"Not this part, love. Are you ready for me?"
"Mmm."
"I need a yes or no, Sam."
"Don't want you to take the fingers out."
Crowley chuckled. "We can keep doing this if you like. Whatever you wish."
"I want you," Sam moaned.
As the fingers were removed Sam let out a soft whine.
"Shh, love," Crowley soothed. "Soon, I promise."
Crowley tugged upward on Sam's hips and Sam raised them. Shoving a pillow underneath him Crowley lightly pressed Sam's hips down onto the pillow. Placing one hand on either side of his ass Crowley spread him open carefully. When he felt Crowley's cock pressing into his hole he had to fight not to tense up again. Sam focussed all of his thoughts on how good the fingers had felt. Despite his best efforts the second the head of Crowley's cock breached him Sam's muscles locked up again.
"Shh, love. You're doing fine. We're just going to wait right now. Relax Sam, just relax."
"No more right now. Please?"
"No more," Crowley agreed. "We're going to stay like just this and wait until you get more used to the feeling. That's all."
Sam nodded unable to speak.
"Sam?"
"Moose," Sam whispered.
"Moose," Crowley agreed. "My beautiful, beautiful Moose. I love you so much." Crowley ran a hand down Sam's back over and over again.
Sam's muscles finally began to relax against the intrusion. It was still slightly painful but not that bad anymore. Sam took several deep breaths.
"Crowley?"
"Moose?"
"I think I'm good now."
"You think?"
"Move? Please?"
"As you wish, my love."
Crowley pressed into him a little farther before pulling back slightly. Carefully Crowley eased himself in and out; forward slightly and back again over and over. Finally Sam was beginning to get used to the movement and the light burn. Maybe he really could do this.
"More," Sam asked.
"You sure?"
Sam nodded.
"I need a yes or no, please."
"Yes. More."
Crowley pressed in slightly farther and held himself there.
"God, Sam. So fucking tight."
"Move?"
"Gods, give me a second," Crowley muttered. "I'm about to embarrass myself here."
Sam smiled. He had been worried he wouldn't be good enough for Crowley because he was too inexperienced. The fact that Crowley was having problems not getting off too soon this early made Sam ridiculously happy. Unable to help it Sam snickered.
"Damn it, Sam," Crowley growled panting.
"Mmm sorry."
Grabbing onto Sam's hips Crowley began moving again. The movements were still slow but each one moved farther and farther forward. Each time Crowley entered him farther Sam wasn't sure if he would be able to take any more inside. Finally he felt Crowley's hips against his own. Crowley pulled back on Sam's hips while pressing his own hips forward.
"Damn it, Sam," Crowley growled. "You're so fucking tight."
"Love you," Sam groaned into the mattress. When Crowley didn't show any signs of moving Sam looked back over his shoulder.
"Crowley?"
"Give me a minute Moose," Crowley panted. "Fuck, you feel amazing."
Smiling Sam laid back down and waited. Finally Crowley began moving again. Each movement was slow and controlled. Before long Sam was rocking back onto Crowley's cock just has he been with Crowley's fingers earlier.
"Faster," Sam moaned.
Crowley sped up slightly.
"Sam?"
"Hmmm," Sam moaned in response.
"I'm going to pull out okay?"
"No," Sam gasped struggling to turn his head to face Crowley.
"Just... just long enough… for you to… flip over."
"Flip over?"
"Yes. When you come… I want to… see."
"'K," Sam acknowledged.
Crowley pulled out suddenly and strong hands gripped Sam's shoulders. Crowley flipped Sam so he was on his back with his ass propped over the pillow. Carefully Crowley slid back inside of Sam. There was only a brief pause this time before Crowley continued moving.
"Damn it Sam, so fucking tight."
"Harder, Crowley."
"As you wish… my love."
As Crowley sped up Sam panted with need. Who knew it would feel this good? Reaching up he grabbed Crowley's shoulders and dragged the demon down against him. Just as Crowley's body covered his own Sam felt something similar to lightning shoot through him. Groaning loudly he arched upward against Crowley's body.
"Like that… did you," Crowley asked, panting heavily with exertion.
Sam moaned loudly, completely incapable of speech. Crowley slammed into him again hitting the same spot and Sam arched his back off the bed once more. He realized he was going to come soon. Looking up he met Crowley's eyes, intent on warning him. Beautiful dark blue eyes glittered back at him and, before he could warn his demon, Sam was coming.
*-*-*-*
Crowley stared at Sam as the hunter's eyes opened. Sam's mouth opened like he was about to say something. Desperately trying to hold his back own orgasm Crowley struggled trying to focus on what Sam was about to say. Instead of speaking Sam's hole instantly tightened on his cock and Crowley let out a loud moan. Gods, his Moose felt amazing. So tight. So hot. It was too much for him to hold himself back any longer.
Crowley's hips shot forward and stuttered as he came. Crowley struggled to keep his eyes open. He needed to see Sam's face. Needed to watch his Moose coming apart underneath him. Crowley's hips rocked slightly several times as his body's instincts took over. Sam lying below him, moaning with his head thrown back in pleasure, was a beautiful sight. Crowley desperately tried to commit this image to memory as his brain was trying to short circuit.
"God, Crowley," Sam moaned.
Crowley could only respond with an undignified groan as he finished riding out his orgasm.
"Crowley?"
Crowley's arms shook with the effort of keeping himself upright. He couldn't collapse on top of his hunter. "S-Sam," Crowley stuttered.
Sam frowned. "You're shaking."
"Arms," Crowley replied. His brain was too fried for more than the most simplistic of answers. Instantly Sam's hands were on his shoulders helping to hold him upright.
"Lay down. I need to feel you against me."
Crowley did his best to shove himself sideways before dropping onto the bed. Twisting he scooted over to curl up around Sam and rested his head on Sam's shoulder. Flinging one arm across Sam's chest Crowley sighed in absolute contentment.
"Love you," Crowley muttered against Sam's chest.
"Love you too," Sam answered.
Sam's hand reached up and stroked his hair. Crowley relaxed into the touch momentarily before he realized he needed to check on Sam. This was Sam's first time. He had to make sure Sam was alright. Shifting he managed lift his head enough to see Sam's face.
"'Kay?"
"Hm?"
"'Kay? You?"
"I'm better than okay, Crowley. Now rest."
Crowley nodded once and dropped his head back onto Sam's shoulder.
"Clean," Crowley asked.
"Clean what?"
"You?"
"I can't get up right now," Sam stated.
"With powers," Crowley answered with a yawn.
There was a brief pause.
"Not just yet," Sam answered putting an arm around him.
Crowley nodded.
"Crowley?"
"Hm?"
"Thank you."
"Welcome Moose."
"Crowley?"
"Hm?"
"Why did you stop calling me Moose outside of the bedroom?"
"Don't want anyone else calling you that." Crowley snuggled against Sam. "My Moose."
Crowley yawned again. As a demon he didn't need to sleep. The bond with Sam allowed him to maintain access to the humanity he had gained during the trials. If he chose he could let the human side take over sometimes. He almost always chose to when he was with Sam.
"Can you start calling me that again. Sometimes?"
"Moose?"
"Yeah."
Crowley craned his neck to look up at Sam. "It bothers you that I don't call you that in front of others?"
"Yes. I don't know why. It's just, I got used to it and then you stopped using it."
"It's a nickname Sam. When I first used it I was trying to be insulting."
"When you use it now all I hear is how much you love me."
Crowley blinked several times. "Really?"
"Yeah."
Reaching up Crowley put a hand on Sam's cheek. "Anything you want, love."
"If you clean me with your powers you don't have to…"
"I don't have to what?"
"You don't have to take everything away do you?"
"You mean the… feeling?"
"Yeah."
Crowley grinned. "No, Moose. I can leave that if you like."
"I'd like that."
"As you wish, my love."
Reaching up with one hand Crowley snapped them both clean.
"Sleep now," Sam asked.
Crowley yawned as he stretched. Finally he settled back against Sam and snuggled in until he was comfortable. His Moose. Crowley smiled at the thought.
"Mmm sleep," Crowley agreed.