Work Text:
Hippy Juice
By PattRose
Summary: Someone has had too much to drink and it's all Naomi's fault.
Genre: Pre-slash
Warnings: Mild Language,
Rating: Teen
Word Count: 899
Jim was on his way home from work and decided he would call Blair to see if dinner was made, or if he should pick something up. He dialed Blair's number and heard, "Hi there, good looking. When are you coming home?"
Jim was certain he dialed the wrong number, because Blair never called him that. Jim wished he would call him that, but he never had.
"Babe, cat got your tongue?" Blair asked, slurring his words.
Well, fuck, he's drunk and is going to be so embarrassed when he wakes up tomorrow.
"Chief, are you drinking on an empty stomach?"
"That's so like you, man. You worry about me all the time. I love when you do that. I love you so much. Hurry home, okay?"
Jim looked confused. "Blair, what are you drinking?"
"My mother made a new drink and it's really, really good. So smooth you don't even know it's got alcohol in it," Blair assured him.
"Naomi is there?"
"Well, yeah, she's the one making the drinks. Wanna talk to her, babe?"
The next thing Jim knew the phone was dropped on the floor and then picked up. Naomi said, "Hi sweetie. Wait until you get home to taste this new drink."
"What's in it, Naomi?" Jim wondered what had both of them so drunk.
"One shot of watermelon vodka, one shot of triple sec, one shot of Malibu Rum, a cup of pink lemonade and a strawberry at the bottom. It's so good sweetie, wait until you taste it."
"I'm parking right now, Naomi. I'm on my way up," Jim answered.
"I'm so happy about you and Blair. It's about time you were together," she said happily.
Jim just shook his head all the way up the stairs. He knew that Blair was going to be embarrassed. But wait a minute, what if these were feelings Blair always had but was afraid to act on them? Jim could live with that.
He opened the door and Blair came carrying a mason jar filled with a pink substance. Blair handed it to Jim and then pulled him down for a kiss. Their first kiss, but Blair acted like it wasn't. Jim pulled back and asked, "Are you feeling all right, Blair?"
"I'm a little hungry. Hungry for you, that is," Blair whispered.
"Blair, I think you might have had too many of these drinks. How many have you had?"
Blair looked like he was really thinking about it for a moment and then called out, "Mom, how many of these have I had?"
"How many what, sweetie?" Naomi asked drunkenly.
Jim just smiled and shook himself again. Blair was actually a cute drunk.
Naomi walked over and said, "Blair, don't make him stand against the front door. Let him come in and relax. He wants another drink, I'm sure."
"Naomi, I haven't even had this one yet," Jim pointed out.
"Do you like it?" she asked.
Jim sighed and took a quick drink so he could answer her. It was delicious. It did go down easy. Blair was right about that. Before long, the mason jar was empty and he was slurping nothing out of the straw. "It's really good, Naomi. What's it called?"
"You're going to love the name, Jim. Hippy Juice. Isn't it perfect for me? And Blair likes it, too."
Jim smiled at her and kissed her cheek.
She patted his chest and said, "Save the kisses for my son. He's been longing for you for the last hour. Thank goodness you're home."
Jim took Blair by the hand and pushed him onto the sofa. Then Jim sat next to him. Naomi grabbed his empty mason jar and went into the kitchen to make him another drink.
Blair started kissing Jim once more and this time, Jim went with it. What the hell, may as well live it up.
Before long Naomi brought him another drink and said, "I'm exhausted. I'll see you in the morning."
"Naomi, it's only 6:30. You might not want to go to bed that early."
"Jim, I think you two need your alone time, if you know what I mean."
She walked into the bedroom and shut the door.
Jim turned back to talk to Blair and found him sleeping on his shoulder. "Chief, come on, let's get you up to bed."
Blair woke up and asked, "We're going to bed?"
"Yes, Chief. We'll talk tomorrow. Tonight you have to sleep off the hippy juice. Come on and I'll help you get up the stairs."
Jim helped him get up there and settled in the big bed. Blair said, "I love you, Jim."
"I love you, too, Blair."
"But mine isn't the hippy juice talking," Blair replied.
"Neither is mine. Now, go to sleep and we'll talk tomorrow."
Just like that, Blair fell asleep with Jim smiling like crazy. For the last six months all he wanted was to tell Blair he loved him and tonight all he did was drink one Hippy Juice and blurted it out. Jim stripped and got into bed with Blair. He was going to snuggle with this man of his dreams all night before Blair woke up and wanted to talk.
Jim's stomach was growling and he thought to himself, Eating is overrated.
The end