Work Text:
Title: "Doom"
Author: Kat Lee
Rating: PG/K+
Summary: Logan's doom is impending, and it's all Jubilee's fault.
Disclaimer: All recognizable characters, names, codenames, places, items, fandoms, titles, and etc. are always © & TM their respective owners, not the author, and are used without permission. Any and all original characters and everything else is © & TM the author and may not be reproduced in any way without the author's express, written permission. The author makes absolutely no profit off of this work of fan fiction, and no copyright infringement is intended.
"Jubilation, you are never having your birthday party on these hallowed, school grounds again."
"Geez, One Eye! Lighten up!"
"Yeah!" Morph sniggered. "It's not like you're the one that got the ice cream dumped on you!"
"Good Heaven, I didn't!" Scott exclaimed haughtily, but even Jean was smiling behind her husband's back.
Warren's perfectly unblemished, white feathers ruffled. "They're right, Scott. Lighten up. Even the Professor wasn't as mad as you are!"
"We should all be furious! That was the utmost sight of indignation bestowed upon our poor Professor's head!"
Hank shrugged his massive, furry, and blue shoulders as several X-Men shot curious glances back and forth between the X-Men's original team leader and the team's usually eloquent Beast. "Do not cast your accusatory glimpses upon my humble, intelligent hide!" Henry told them. "I had not the slightest indication that he intended to employ the advancements of the English language I have taught him recently to decree that fun should be punished, and although I can see his point, you all are well aware, too, that should I actually agree with our fearless leader in his current endeavor, I would not label the area that inflicted the embarrassment our poor, cherished Professor as his head but quite rather his cranium!"
Logan sniffed but sheathed his claws. "Whatever," he growled, causing several more of their team mates to laugh at the word that he'd picked up from his best friend whose special day had caused the interests in all their minds. He cast a warning glower at Cyclops who tried, unsuccessfully, to hide his responding gulp. "But Jubes is still havin' her birthday here next year, if she wants it."
"Oh, you know I want it, Wolveroonie!"
"Yeah, but how on Earth are y'all evah gonna top this year, shugah?" Rogue implored.
"Yeah," Bobby added, laughing, "I don't think it can be done, Jubes! Not even I have ever managed to land ice cream on the Professor's head!"
Even Kitty giggled, and Jean at last erupted with laughter. She slid between Warren and Bobby as her husband turned his imperious glower onto her. "Save it, Scott!" she told him, waving a hand dismissively at him. "Poor Charles' expression was one of the most hilarious sights we've seen since we became X-Men!"
"Ahem." Jean instantly straightened and grew solemn. Scott looked justifiably proud. Hank, Remy, Rogue, Kitty, Kurt, and Ororo all ceased their laughter as did Warren, who also nudged Bobby until he hushed and hit Morph. Morph almost swallowed his tongue.
"Thank you, Ororo, for that cleansing rain," Charles spoke quietly to the lady at his side. She nodded and stepped away. Then, in a louder voice, still free of admonishment, Charles stated, "You are all dismissed."
The others hurried away, leaving only Wolverine standing between Jubilee and the Professor. "This ain't a Danger Room session, Chuck."
"I deserve some time alone with our birthday girl, Logan."
Wolverine glanced at Jubilee, who looked like she'd gone paler than Ororo's pure white hair, but in the end, nodded his acceptance. "Go easy on her," he demanded before walking away to leave the kid to her fate.
"Prof., I really didn't mean -- "
Charles waited until every one was out of earshot, and then he smiled upon his youngest charge. "I know, Jubilation, but a modicum of respect is to be expected and perhaps even required in all aspects of life."
"Yes, sir." She tried to blow a bubble, but it popped. She didn't even move to wipe the gum from her face.
Charles did instead, handing her a tissue and then an envelope. "Do not open it at this time," he instructed her. "Go to the address on the seal, and bring none of it home with you."
Jubilee remained puzzled until she and Wolvy reached the address in question. When they spotted the location, she screamed so loudly that Wolverine was thankful for his healing factor yet again for it would speed the mending of his shattered eardrums. Unlike Jubilee, however, he grimaced when he saw the ice cream shop and realized that Charles had tucked a gift certificate into the envelope. Payback really was a bitch. Now it was his time to wear ice cream everywhere, and Ororo and her rain were back at the house, safe, dry, and far away from Jubilee's impending mess. "Happy birthday, darlin'," he growled, "but don't you dare coat me in that mess."
"I would never!" Jubilee batted her eyelashes, but her innocent look confirmed his worst suspicions as she dragged him into the shop.
"Aw, Hell." Then the smells of chocolate, vanilla, strawberry, caramel, whipped cream, and most of all, ice cream hit his nose. He sighed inwardly as he heard Remy's bike, Hank's car, and Rogue's jeep in the near distance. If he had to want to die or want to kill his "daughter" for embarrassment, at least it would be by way of chocolate. He let her drag him to his impending doom.
The End