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Derek walked through the front door and quickly punched in the code for the alarm. Then he dropped his go bag to the side and turned to hug Dave tightly. He buried his face in the side of Dave’s neck.
Dave rubbed Derek’s back. “It’s okay, Derek.”
Derek’s voice was small. “Dave.”
“It’s okay,” Dave murmured. “We’re home. Just breathe.”
They stood there for a long while, just holding each other and listening to each other breathe. Then Derek shuddered. “You heard JJ and Blake. All those boys at that camp. They were tortured and stripped of all identity. Some of them were even sexually molested and their parents let it happen.”
Dave kissed the top of Derek’s head. “They need help and it will take a long time, but they can come back.”
“Or be broken beyond repair,” Derek retorted bitterly. “In another ten or fifteen years, we’ll have another Paul Westin.”
“Not necessarily. Some people come back stronger after being broken. You did,” Dave said in a voice barely above a whisper.
Derek stiffened but didn’t explode. He held Dave tighter. “I had family at my back and the same can’t be said of all those kids. And I still made a lot of mistakes trying to find my way,” he admitted in a low voice. “Mom told me that there was a time when she thought I’d die on the streets. I came close once and the only thing I could think about was Dad. After that, I was determined I was going to get things right.”
Dave pushed Derek away just enough to see his face. He managed a crooked smile. “My mother was afraid I’d end up with the outfit like Ray. She hated that I went off to war but she liked what being a marine did for me.” He continued to rub Derek’s back. “Events help shape us but we still make our own choices. Instead of getting the professional help he needed, Westin lashed out. He let the past eat at him until there was nothing left except for hurt and rage.”
Derek sighed heavily. “I’m not defending what he did, but you’re screwed when your only parent keeps drilling it into your head that you’re broken or defective. He loved another boy instead of a girl. Who cares? A father is supposed to love his son no matter what. I can’t say that I’m sorry that we didn’t make it in time to save Westin’s old man.”
“True and the people who pervert religion don’t help.”
Derek pulled away. He shook his head. “If there is a God, I don’t think He gives a damn about us.”
Dave patted Derek’s shoulder. “He does, but he also gave us free will. We’re free to make our own mistakes but He loves us no matter what.”
Derek squeezed Dave’s hand. He gave a half smile. “Let’s not get into that argument again. I’m too tired.”
“Me too.”
Derek kissed Dave softly and then rested his forehead against Dave’s. “How about a shower, a scotch, and then bed?”
Dave smiled against Derek’s lips. “That sounds like a good plan.”
Derek cupped the side of Dave’s neck. “I love you.”
It was Dave’s turn to kiss Derek. “I love you, too.”