Chapter Text
Disclaimer: I don't own Captain Jack Harkness, Rhys Williams, Ianto Jones, Owen Harper, Suzie Costello or Toshiko Sato. . .they are all the property of Russell T. Davies, BBC, and Starz Studios. Major Will Lennox, Sergeant Robert Epps, Secretary of Defense John Keller, Ratchet, and Optimus Prime (and any other TF character mentioned here) also do not belong to me. They're the property of Hasbro and others. Who does belong to me? Lacey Keller Harkness, Corey Harkness, and the rest of the extended Keller-Harkness clan. Don't mind if you borrow them: just please ask first and return them to me intact.
Cattin' Around
Prologue
A Tour Gone Awry
Hoover Dam, Nevada
Six weeks after Canary Wharf, 2006
By the end of his first day of cross-training, Rhys Williams was growing more certain that his life took a turn toward the outright bizarre. Well, it did that when he met Wheeljack for the first time. But over the months, he grew more and more comfortable with the idea of talking cars and talking lorries. He enjoyed his time with the Autobots and with the humans in NEST. Then came the day when Major Lennox showed up and told him that he would be cross-training at Hoover Dam with the institute that was NEST's forerunner. . .Torchwood.
Rhys heard of Torchwood even before he left Cardiff. . .they were a constant source of aggravation for the residents of Cardiff as far back as he could remember. They simply swanned in and took over crime scenes from the police, they were rude, they were arrogant, and they got even worse when the gits from London came down. So, he was more than a little surprised to discover that there was now a Torchwood in the United States, run by one Captain Jack Harkness. He should have expected something, by the way Major Lennox and Sergeant Epps reacted when he asked about the cross-training. Sergeant Epps laughed hysterically, while Major Lennox discreetly kicked the other man's ankle, explaining that the US branch of Torchwood was headed up by a rather. . .unusual individual.
That should have been his first clue. . .first two clues, rather. And then, he actually reached Hoover Dam. The first person he met there was a slim, dark-haired young woman about his own age, whom Major Lennox greeted warmly as ‘Lacey.' She asked him ruefully if Rhys was the latest hire for the agency she didn't know about (had to be a story there) and Major Lennox gave her an apologetic smile. She waved it off, reminding the major that she was no novice when it came to classified. Rhys blinked, but before he had the chance to ask her, she was offering to accompany them on an impromptu tour of the facilities. It was then that Rhys learned she was married to Captain Harkness. Well. . .that certainly explained a lot, especially her comment about being no stranger to classified!
However, as he learned, that wasn't the whole story. She was also the daughter of the Secretary of Defense, John Keller, who created NEST with Major Lennox and Optimus Prime, the leader of the Autobots. She knew a few things, but didn't know about the Autobots (yet). And Rhys had to give Major Lennox credit, for explaining that without mentioning the Autobots once by name. It was, ‘our new allies.' Lacey Harkness, for her own part, chimed in with information that Rhys appreciated, though he wasn't entirely sure if most of this information would be useful to him. Still, you just never knew. They were reaching the old experimentation room (or so Major Lennox said) when a tall, dark-haired man burst out of the room, calling, "Lacey-girl! Where. . .oh, there you are!" Before Rhys had time to do anything other than gawp in total and complete astonishment, Lacey was being literally swept off her feet, disappearing in a flurry of swirling coat. Only the major's quick thinking kept Rhys from being swept up in that cloth maelstrom, as Lennox grasped Rhys' forearm and tugged him out of the way.
The young Welshman blinked in astonishment as his new friend was twirled around, drawing delighted laughter from her. Major Lennox whispered, "That's Jack Harkness, Lacey's husband and the director of Torchwood America. And before you ask, yes, he usually does greet her like that when she shows up here, and no, he didn't know she was coming today." Rhys blinked at the rather passionate snog. . .and were her legs wrapped around her husband's waist under his coat? They were! How did they manage that? Lennox added softly, "We don't ask certain questions. Jack will answer, but his answers usually break our brains." Yeah. Rhys could imagine. At last, Jack Harkness settled his dazed wife on her feet again, keeping an arm around her as he turned to face Rhys and Major Lennox.
"Oh. Hello. You must be the new recruit. . .Rhys, wasn't it? Rhys Williams, from Cardiff?" the dark-haired man asked, giving Rhys an appreciative once-over. Rhys nodded a bit warily and the newcomer continued, "Captain Jack Harkness, Director of Torchwood America, and husband to this beautiful lady." Lacey rolled her eyes, but Rhys had to smile. . .because it was clear to him, at least, that to Jack Harkness, his wife was beautiful. He wasn't sure how that worked, exactly, when he was clearly flirting with Rhys only seconds earlier, but apparently, Jack Harkness flirted, even though he obviously loved his wife deeply, and Lacey was okay with that. Major Lennox mouthed, ‘you get used to it.' Rhys didn't know about that, but. . .
Out loud, Major Lennox explained, "Rhys is doing his cross-training this week, Jack. Try not to frighten him off, okay?" Frighten him off? Yeah, he flirted, and that was a bit. . .odd. . .but why would he be frightened? Major Lennox explained, "It isn't Jack that freaks most new recruits out. . .at least, not any more. . .it's what Torchwood deals with. Yeah, he's a little on the odd side, but once you've met Simmons, Jack's downright normal." That drew laughter from Lacey, who was now reclining comfortably against her husband's chest, followed by a squeak when he evidently tickled her. Lennox added with a sigh, "I did say, compared to Simmons, Lacey."
"Good point. . .and I'll say no more on that subject. I don't want to make Rhys any more nervous than he already is," Lacey observed. Which, of course, had that very effect. Any time someone said something like that... Rhys was on the point of asking about Simmons when a ruckus caught his attention. Lacey muttered, "Oh, you have got to be kidding me. . .Jack, so help me God, if I find out that Owen is giving Ianto a hard time again, I'll put my foot up his arse. I warned him about that." Captain Harkness released his wife just long enough to take her hand, though he didn't look especially happy either.
"Let's have a look. . .but I'm sure Ianto is more than capable of taking care of himself. Remember what happened the last time Owen decided to be a git?" Captain Harkness reminded his wife. Lacey actually snickered and Captain Harkness explained as he, Lacey, Major Lennox and Rhys headed in the direction of the ruckus, "Ianto is a new hire of mine. . .sort of a receptionist/butler/archivist/whatever we need him to be. Our doctor, Owen, has evidently forgotten a lesson that Lacey taught him years ago. . .it's the quiet ones you need to be wary of. Ianto's capable of nearly anything."
Ianto? There was another Welshman here? However, Rhys simply followed the married couple downstairs, Major Lennox at his side. On the way down, the captain and his lady discussed their daughter, five year old Corinna). . .Lacey's two younger sisters (Bronnie and Cissie, the former of whom was coming for a visit). . .and about a trip Lacey took to a nearby hotel. (Major Lennox explained in an undertone that Lacey was conceived near Hoover Dam. Rhys regarded that as too much information, but apparently that was part of an in-joke around here)
"Okay, kids, what have we got? Tosh, is that part of the most recent shipment from Three?" Captain Harkness inquired. A young Oriental woman nodded, but it was a tall, stunning brunette who approached the newcomers. Rhys was devoted to his Gwen, who was gorgeous in her own right, but he could still appreciate a stunner like this lady. The girl addressed as ‘Tosh' was quite pretty as well, and Lacey was cute in a ‘girl next door' kind of way. Rhys was beginning to wonder if Captain Harkness had anyone on his team who wasn't attractive.
"We can't quite figure out what it is, Jack. . .Lacey, you made it!" the brunette said, scooping the woman in question into a fierce embrace. Lacey squeaked (again), and the woman released her, turning her attention to Rhys, saying, "I'm Suzie Costello and this is Toshiko Sato. . .nice to meet you." British. Definitely British. Captain Harkness and his wife were both American. Ianto was a Welsh name, and Tosh was. . .well, he wasn't sure yet. Interesting group. Torchwood America, it seemed, was as varied as NEST was. . .and NEST had a wide variety of people and backgrounds. Oh, and Captain Harkness also mentioned someone named ‘Owen.'
"Rhys Williams, NEST. What are you doing?" Rhys inquired. For the first time, he saw what the two young women were handling. It was a relatively small item, about the same size and shape as a fire extinguisher. Judging by the ease with which that the two women were handling it, however, it was far lighter. Suzie immediately launched into an explanation, half of which he understood. . .but he wasn't really worried. Before he encountered the Autobots and NEST, everything she said would have been Greek to him. And not for the first time, he wished he could have told Banana and Dafydd about the Autobots.
He learned from Suzie that about once a month, Torchwood America received a shipment from their counterpart in Cardiff, consisting of items that they couldn't quite figure out. Suzie was of the opinion that like Torchwood London, Torchwood Cardiff wasn't interested in anything that wasn't a weapon. She lowered her voice, adding that their newest member was originally in Torchwood London, but he actually seemed to be a nice kid. Rhys heard about the massacre at Canary Wharf in London, and he shuddered. He was working with Ratchet on that day, learning about the inner workings of the Autobots, and witnessed that rarest of sights: Optimus Prime when he was enraged. It wasn't something one forgot readily, not when it came to such a gentle being as the Autobot leader. Apparently, the events at Canary Wharf hardened Prime's resolve not to share Cybertronian weapons with humanity as a whole. Rhys really couldn't blame him.
While Rhys, Suzie, and Toshiko inspected the cylinder, Captain Harkness warned them to take it into a safe area. . .they had no idea what it would do, and the last thing he wanted was to accidently vaporize anyone. Suzie nodded, backing away a little, toward another area. At the same time, the captain and the other two moved a short distance away, discussing something. No one was entirely sure why it happened or what they touched, but the cylinder began shaking and whining. The captain froze and pivoted to face them. Rhys was struggling to control the cylinder, trying to make sure neither of the girls was hurt. Captain Harkness called out something that Rhys couldn't make out. . .the cylinder was making too much noise, but his worried expression warned Rhys that this wouldn't end well. As the man started over to them, a white beam shot out from the cylinder. . .striking the captain in the chest. The cry that emerged from Jack Harkness would likely haunt Rhys' nightmares for the rest of his life: a sound of pure agony. Lacey cried out and started to run to her husband, but Major Lennox grabbed her around the waist and held on tightly. No easy task, as she writhed in his grasp and kept trying to kick his shins. However, the major had that covered as well.
Behind Rhys, Suzie and Toshiko were crying in horror, but the Welshman was struggling to find the off-switch. Captain Harkness was screaming in agony, collapsing to his knees, and Rhys felt something, an indentation under his hand. He pressed it. . .and his own world went white. When he came back to himself, he was lying on the ground, his head resting on. . .something. . .and a grumpy, ‘shift yer arse!' informed him that it was someone's body part. Leg, he realized when he did, indeed, move. . .more to the point, it was Suzie Costello's leg. He groaned and rolled away from her, smacking into the cylinder at the same time. Rhys wobbled his way to his feet, looking around to check on the others. Suzie and Toshiko were helping each other up, holding onto each other for support. A quick glance across the room told him that Major Lennox was helping Lacey to her feet, both looking as wobbly as Rhys felt.
"Jack? Sweetheart, wh. . .oh, God!" Lacey cried out. She lurched out of Lennox's grip finally, but didn't get far. For the first time, Rhys noticed the long, dark-colored greatcoat lying in the middle of the floor. His blood ran cold, because it was the exact same greatcoat that Captain Harkness was wearing earlier. Things quickly went from bad to surreal when a tiny head poked out from under the coat and Lacey gasped, "Jack?" She dropped to her knees and scooted across the floor as an equally small body emerged from the massive coat with an inquisitive, ‘mrroww?' Lacey eased the body into her arms, cradling the small creature against her chest protectively. The creature made a contented noise, snuggling into the young woman's arms as she carefully rose to her feet.
Tosh made a horrified noise in the back of her throat, Rhys stared in utter shock, while Major Lennox left his position to pick up the greatcoat, along with the rest of the captain's clothes. But it was Suzie who said in a hollow voice, "It's Jack. Jack's been turned into a cat. That thing turned my boss into a cat!" Rhys couldn't swear to it, but it almost sounded like Major Lennox mumbled something along the lines of, ‘Welcome to Torchwood.'
TBC