Actions

Work Header

Rating:
Archive Warning:
Category:
Fandoms:
Relationship:
Additional Tags:
Language:
English
Collections:
Peja's Wonderful World of Makebelieve Import
Stats:
Published:
2020-11-05
Words:
1,163
Chapters:
1/1
Kudos:
15
Hits:
1,251

Suction

Summary:

Reponse to the urban legend challenge.

Work Text:

Disclaimer: All publicly recognizable characters, settings, etc. are the property of their respective owners. The original characters and plot are the property of the author.  The author is in no way associated with the owners, creators, or producers of any media franchise.  No copyright infringement is intended.

Title: Suction
Author: Jen lmr

Date: Jan 2001
Rating: NC-17
Category: Slash
Pairing: Starbuck/Apollo
Feedback: jennylmr@yahoo.com


Summary: Reponse to the urban legend challenge.


Starbuck sighed and rolled his eyes for the umpteenth time. "Come on, Apollo, let's go already."

"In a centon."

"You said that fifteen centons ago."

"I won't be too much longer."

"I'll believe that when I see it. Why do you have to be such a neat freak anyway?"

"I'm not a neat freak. I just don't like coming home to a mess. Is that so wrong?" Apollo said as he continued vacuuming the carpet in the main living area.

"It is when it's stopping us from going out and having a good time."

"We'll still have fun. I'm almost through here. There's plenty of time. I don't know why you feel the need to go out so often anyway. It's not like we couldn't have a good time at home." The brunette stated as he pulled out the vacuum's attachment hose to get the dust balls that had collected in one of the corners.

The blond eyed his lover who was now bent over giving him a nice view of his delectable rear end. "You know, I think you just might be right."

"I am?" Apollo turned and looked at Starbuck questioningly.

Starbuck gave him an evil grin and began taking off his clothes. "Oh, yes. I just thought of a wonderful way we could have a good time at home."

"If it involves the two of us being naked together, I'm all for it." The captain started hurriedly pulling off his own clothes.

When he was fully naked Starbuck moved over to him with a mischievous gleam in his eyes.

Apollo started to lean in to him then stopped. "Just let me put this vacuum cleaner away."

"Oh, no you don't, Sire Neat Freak. I have plans for that vacuum."

"You do?" Green eyes blinked in confusion.

"I most certainly do." Starbuck kissed his lover teasingly then reached down, switched the vacuum cleaner on, and grabbed the hose.

"You're not thinking what I think you're thinking, are you?" Apollo started backing up.

"If you're thinking that I plan to use this on you, then the answer is yes."

"S-s-starbuck, I don't know about this."

"Relax. You'll love it. I used to hear about guys doing this all the time back at the academy." He gave his lover a reassuring kiss.

"Well if you're sure."

"Positive." The lieutenant took the hose and lightly placed it above his lover's already semi-hard penis.

"Oh! Oh! That feels so weird!"

"Weird good or weird bad?" Starbuck asked as he moved the hose further onto Apollo's organ.

"Ohhhhh! Weird good. Don't stop!"

Covering Apollo's cock entirely with the hose, Starbuck began kissing his wingmate hungrily. The captain moaned into his mouth and pumped his hips back and forth.

"Mmmmmm. Mmmmmoooooorrrrrreeeeee."

Starbuck held on tight to the hose and began teasing Apollo's nipples with his tongue until they became hard little buds.

"Ohhhhhhhhhhhh! This feels soooooooo goooooooooodddd!! Oooooooooohhhhhhhhhh yyyeeeeeessssss!" The brunette buried his face against his lover's shoulder as he came forcefully.

"Didn't I tell you you'd love this?" Starbuck breathed.

"Ooohh yesss. I should have never doubted you," Apollo panted.

"I've never steered you wrong before, have I?"

"That's debatable. Help me get this thing off of me so I can take care of you." He gestured meaningfully at the blonde's erection.

"Sure thing. Uh oh..."

"What do you mean 'uh oh'? Get it off."

"It doesn't seem to want to come off. Don't panic, just give me a centon."

"Starbuck, this thing had better not be stuck." Apollo said menacingly after his lover had been tugging and wiggling on the hose unsuccessfully for several centons.

"Don't worry, don't worry. I'll get it off."

"You better."

After ten more centons of unsuccessfully trying to get the hose off of his increasingly agitated lover Starbuck finally admitted defeat.

"I don't believe this!" Apollo stormed. "How do I let you talk me into these things?! What am I going to do now?!"

"We could try cutting it off," Starbuck suggested, trying not to snicker at the sight of that hose jiggling around whenever Apollo moved.

"Cut it off?!! Are you crazy?!!!!!"

"Well the only other thing we can do is go to the life center and see if they can remove it."

"The life center?!!!! Now I know you're crazy! I can't go to the life center for this!!"

"I don't know what else to do. We can take the hose off the vacuum and hide it under your jacket. Nobody will see it."

"The doctor will see it!!!"

"Do you have any better ideas?"

After trying oil, hot water, cold water, and quite a bit more tugging, Apollo finally agreed to go to the life center. "You know I'm going to get you for this, don't you?"

"Apollo," Starbuck said pleadingly, "there's no way I could have known something like this would happen."

"Stuff like this always happens when you're involved," Apollo snapped.

"Actually this is a first for me too."

"Oh, shut up."

At the life center they went up to the registration desk and asked to see a doctor, refusing to tell the med tech why.

"Just take a seat and I'll see if there's a doctor available," the tech said giving them both a look of disapproval.

They waited in the chairs for over fifteen centons with Apollo shooting murderous glares at his lover the whole time.

"The doctor will see you now," the med tech called over to them.

Apollo stood up and the next thing he knew the med tech was gaping at him with a shocked look on her face. The hose had fallen out of his jacket and onto the floor!

'Oh, Sagan! Just when I thought things couldn't get any worse!' Apollo moaned inwardly as he hurriedly grabbed the hose and stuffed it back under his jacket. He followed the med tech to an exam room refusing to look anywhere but at the floor.

He could swear he saw a smirk on the doctors face when he came in to the room to examine him. On the way out of the life center he was absolutely positive he heard a few snickers.

When they got back to his quarters Starbuck did his best to soothe his fuming lover. Giving the 'injured' body part his full attention with his mouth and tongue seemed to do the trick.

The next morning Starbuck was jolted awake by his lover's outraged scream. Running out of the bedchamber his saw his lover standing in the middle of the living area staring at the view screen in abject horror.

The news of last night's incident was on the IFB!


The End