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English
Series:
Part 1 of Hogswallow
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Peja's Wonderful World of Makebelieve Import
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Published:
2020-11-05
Words:
737
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1/1
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6
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1,735

Chances

Summary:

Spoilers for the stills of 5x04- Dean finds a future that almost breaks him
Disclaimer: So not mine, never have been, never will be. They belong to Kripke/McG/et al, and a bunch of other corporate-type ppl, in other words, not me.
Beta: My beautiful kitty_alex who not only planted the seeds of Dean/Cas and continues to feed the fire, but has the guts to tell me when my writing sucks!

Work Text:

~~~~~~~~~

It had been several years since Castiel had laid eyes on the man standing before him, and he hadn't aged a day. Actually, neither of them had, but to say neither had changed would be ludicrous.
Cas knew Dean hadn't changed- he remembered four years ago, when Dean had confided in him about his little visit to the future. Though now, Cas understood Dean's reluctance to talk about it.
Castiel himself had changed so much. He was comfortable in his human skin, comfortable with his beliefs and where his faith lay. And it was all due to this man.

"Cas?" Dean's tone was incredulous, at best. This couldn't be his angel, this creature was scruffy and charismatic, but the power that radiated from him and those piercing sapphire eyes that saw down to his soul and still deigned to look at him, care for him were unmistakable.

Castiel's smile threatened to split his face in two as he approached Dean and pulled him into a powerful embrace. It had taken losing the hunter for Cas to truly accept his humanity, for him to understand the depth of his feelings, and what he was capable of feeling. There was so much he wanted to tell Dean, things he hadn't been able to before, things he doubted he could have put words to even had he been aware of them. But he knew Dean would be leaving all too soon and once again he'd lose his hunter, so he held Dean slightly longer than necessary and tried not to read anything into the fact that Dean seemed to return the embrace just as fiercely.

~~~

That night Dean slept in Castiel's bed and as he had done so many nights years ago, Cas watched over him. Every line and curve of the hunter's face and body were etched into Castiel's mind. He'd caressed and traced each and every one in his mind. Now that Dean was here in Cas' world, in his bed, the angel ached to touch him. He'd become an incredibly tactile creature in the years without Dean's presence. He knew he was merely attempting to fill the emptiness Dean left him with, but touch had become very important to him. Right now, he needed to touch.
For the first time since he'd cradled that slack body in his arms, tears rolling down his face into the short mousy hair of his hunter, Castiel unfurled his wings. He didn't trust himself to actually touch the man, but his wings, they could caress and feel in their own way- a sensation more spiritual than physical, though more vivid to his being, yet easier not to act upon.
Cas slowly trailed his wingtips over Dean's sleeping body, letting his heat and life fill him. He had no idea how long he spent stroking the hunter, but he started at the broken cry that rang through the small room. He pulled his wings back quickly, afraid he'd disturbed or awakened his hunter. It was only when the second sob was wrenched from his chest that he acknowledged the outcries were his.
The angel squeezed his eyes shut and backed away from Dean, unused to the intensity of his emotions.

Castiel's cries pierced Dean's sleep and he shot up out of the bed, instincts on alert. What he saw tore at his heart; Castiel, wings outspread, eyes screwed shut, hand rubbing the beads around his wrist- an obvious soothing gesture. "Cas?" Dean whispered as he slowly moved towards the angel. "Cas, buddy, what's wrong?"

Holding his position, Cas grit out, "I'm not the being I once was. I no longer have the strength to fight my desires. I'm sorry, Dean."

Dean moved closer, invading the angel's personal space the way he had always done with Dean. "Sometimes desires are there for a reason, Cas. Sometimes they need to be acted on."

The words ghosted over Castiel's lips, Dean's warm breath tantalizing in its proximity. Then Dean's lips were on his and his world spun on its axis. As their kiss depended, Castiel clung to the knowledge that time was fluid, ever changing, that this was but one possible timeline, that when Dean returned to his own time they would have a chance. A chance to save the world and a chance to save each other.

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