Work Text:
Title: Stay
Author: Maxine
Fandom: The X-Files
Rating: MA (to be safe)
Pairing: Sk/M, Sc/M, SK/D
Warning: A bit of Mulder bashing. Not going to warn about the slash… you know it’s here.
Disclaimer: Chris Carter and company owns these characters, I just like playing with them from time to time. No harm, no foul intended and no money made from this.
Summary: Walter wants Mulder to stay.
AN: This was inspired by the heart-wrenching song Stay by Sugarland. Lyrics are after the story. You should watch the video if you haven’t seen it, really!
Stay
The knock at the door startled Walter.
“Excuse me, John.” He got up to answer.
Surprised to see Mulder on the other side; “Mulder I wasn’t expecting you. Come in.”
“I was … oh, sorry I hadn’t realized you had company.” Mulder said meekly.
“That’s okay, Mulder. Walt, we can do this tomorrow. I appreciate your help.” John stood and collected the papers laid out on the coffee table.
“You don’t have to leave on my account Agent Doggett.” Mulder offered, unconvincingly.
“It’s all right. We were just … AD Skinner was just helping me sort through some old files. Nothing that can’t wait.” John turned to Walter and asked silently if he was okay. With a brief nod Walt assured him he was fine.
“Good to see you again, Mulder. Tell Scully I said hi next time you see her.”
Mulder blanched at the mention of his significant other’s name. He was sure Doggett had no idea why he was here, but that didn’t stop his slightly paranoid mind from thinking otherwise.
“I will, thanks,” he answered soberly.
“I’ll see you at the office tomorrow, John.” Walter said then whispered “I’m fine, really.”
John nodded, grabbed his coat and left quickly.
Once he was gone Mulder breathed a sigh of relief. “I’m sorry I didn’t think you’d be busy. I would have called first.”
“It’s okay, Mulder. As John said we weren’t involved in anything that couldn’t wait. Would you like a drink or something?” Walter asked as he headed for the kitchen.
“No.” Mulder took hold of Walter’s arm. “Nothing to drink, just you,” he said, leaning in to kiss Walter’s neck. “I’ve missed you.”
Walter sighed then relaxed. He had missed his lover also, far too much these days. Allowing Mulder to fold him into his arms, Walter gave himself over to the pleasure of being held by the younger man.
The kiss on his neck became one on his cheek then his lips were covered by the warm, wet smoothness of Mulder’s. How long had it been? Too long obviously from how Walter’s body was responding.
“Let’s take this to the bedroom,” Mulder whispered. “I want to see you naked, now.”
Taking the younger man’s hand, Walter obeyed the command and led him upstairs.
Clothing were removed, kisses were exchanged, then body heat and fluids. The bed was rumpled, sheets eschewed. When both men sated, Walter gathered Mulder into his arms and reveled in the feel of him. They’d started this affair a little over a year ago, after what Walter thought was years of dancing around their attraction.
Fox Mulder was more than willing to sleep with his ex-boss. Mulder told him that every time they were together that he really liked having sex with Walter. And then….
The ringing of Mulder’s phone brought reality back into view.
“Mulder. Hey Scully, yeah. Okay. I’ll be there in a bit. No, no Walter and I were just sitting around talking; I needed to get my suit from his closet. Saw Doggett too, he… yeah. I’ll tell you when I get there. Bye” Mulder was already out of bed and moving toward the bathroom.
“Sorry, I have to go. Scully is the guest of honor at some Science thing, starts at 8 p.m. I really don’t want…”
“It’s okay, Mulder. I understand. It’s important to her career. I wish you didn’t have to leave, that you could stay. But she’s important.” Walter sighed and got out of bed, pulled his sweats on and grabbed his robe. “Take a quick shower; I’ll get your suit. Doesn’t Dana wonder why most of your dress clothes are here?”
“No, no, I told her that I’d moved most of my suits and dressier things here since you offered when I had to go into hiding that time. And I just never thought to collect them, didn’t really need them when I got back.” Mulder answered sheepishly.
“I see, and she doesn’t want you to move them into your place? It would make more sense be at your place. After all, there isn’t any threat anymore and the two of you have been living together for almost two years.”
“It’s never come up.” Mulder started to fidget. Walter understood the nerves.
“Go on, Mulder, I’ll be in the kitchen.” Walter left the room and went downstairs.
When he got to the kitchen he saw that he’d forgotten to clean up after the dinner he and John had shared. Well, no, correction, he hadn’t forgotten, he hadn’t had a chance to. Mulder came by and that was the end of Walter doing anything other than pleasing his lover.
That thought sounded bitter, even to himself. Was he angry? Bitter? Why should he be? He’d chosen to accept Mulder as his lover, knowing full well that the younger man was involved, completely, with Dana Scully. Did he have the right to be upset about the bits and pieces of time he got to spend with the other man? It just seemed to Walter that whenever Dana called, regardless of what the reason was, Mulder ran out the door, leaving Walter standing there with a word – a plea, hovering on his lips – for Mulder to stay. That he could give Mulder everything Mulder needed, that Dana couldn’t possibly love Mulder as Walter did.
Once, Walter caught himself just before he got on his knees to actually beg the younger man not to leave him. Walter shook his thoughts from his head. As much as he wanted to ask Mulder why he kept leaving, when time and again the younger man had said he would leave Dana to be with him, Walter knew in his heart that those words, weren’t true. Mulder would never do that to Dana, and it still hurt to have to share someone he loved with another.
Mulder came down the stairs at a trot. “I have to hurry, Walter, Scully gets impatient, and you know how it is.”
“Sure, Mulder, have a good night. I’ll see you soon.”
Mulder gave him a quick kiss on the cheek and he was out the door.
Walter stood staring at the door long after it had closed. Again, wondering why he was doing this. Well, it was obvious, he loved Mulder and Mulder had to love him, he kept coming back. Continued to need Walter. So, Walter would just wait, wait for the time when Mulder realized that Walter was all he truly needed, and realize that Dana couldn’t give him the same love and devotion.
Six weeks later
“John, why don’t you come by after work? We can go through more of those files. I’m really interested in a couple of them, myself.”
“That’ll work, Walt. I’ll bring dinner, maybe Cuban tonight?”
“Perfect, it’s been a while.” Walter’s office phone rang; “Excuse me. Skinner. Oh, hi. Doing? Tonight? Agent Doggett and I were… No, Mulder I don’t think I can.”
John waved him off “It’s okay Walt, tomorrow is just as good. It’s Saturday, no plans here. Whatever Mulder needs you for, it’s all good, honest.” John put on his best smile. He would never let on that he knew what was going on between his boss and Mulder, or how much he hated to see Walter kowtow to the other man, John figured Walter must love Mulder deeply to put up with being a side item.
“Are you sure, John?” Walter asked, his hand covering the phone.
“Yeah, no big deal. It’s not like these cases are pressing. It’s all just idle curiosity. I’ll come by tomorrow around one or two, after I finish a few things… Go on, Mulder’s probably getting antsy being kept on hold.”
Once again, John found himself collecting his files and his thoughts, and removed himself quickly, before he could tell his friend - and boss - the man was being a fool. Anyone who knew Mulder and Scully knew they’d never be apart from each other. Without a glance, John left the office, causing Walter to sigh. He really didn’t want to alienate his friend.
“Sorry, Mulder, No, Agent Doggett left, he took a rain check. Yes, fine. I’ll see you at my place in about an hour.”
Later that night, as he and Mulder lay in bed, again, Walter couldn’t help but wonder. Why did it have to always be like this? They’d barely spoken before the two of them were falling into Walter’s bed. Mulder began stripping him as soon as the door was closed and Walter had to stop Mulder from fucking him right there on the living room floor. Mulder had been particularly harsh tonight, almost angry, although Walter couldn’t figure out what Mulder could be distraught over. Hadn’t Walter, once again, changed his plans, put his life on hold for Mulder?
“Want to tell me this was all about, Mulder?”
“What this. Walter?” Mulder asked as he turned away and got out of bed.
“You seemed to be pissed at me.”
“No, why would I be?”
“Exactly, so why the rush job and the need to cause pain?”
“Didn’t you like what I did? I thought you enjoyed…”Mulder began defensively.
“Mulder, listen, I don’t mind it rough every now and then. Hell, I encourage it sometimes. I’m just confused as to what prompted the episode tonight. You came through the door agitated and seemed to take it out on me, like I’d done something wrong.”
“No, it’s not you. I … I guess I was just pissed about Doggett.”
“What about John? What does he have to do with any of this?”
“Everything! It seems like whenever I call or come over lately, he’s right there. Staking you out.”
“What?” Walter laughed. “Mulder, don’t be ridiculous. John works for me, reports directly to me. Of course, he’s around a lot. It’s part of his job, part of my job to be in contact with the agents under my immediately supervision. You know this.” Walter was baffled by the younger man’s behavior.
“Yeah, well, I guess I just don’t like that he thinks you’ve got nothing better to do than spend your evenings with him.”
“Most of the time I don’t have anything planned. And not that I have to explain myself to you, but, today was the first time in weeks John and I had made any kind of plans to do anything outside the office. Which, need I remain you, that I cancelled the minute you called.”
“Reluctantly.” Mulder grumbled.
“Mulder, you can’t possibly be jealous of John Doggett. I’m not fucking him.” Walter no longer found this conversation amusing. His entire life revolved around phone calls from Mulder, snippets of time he could get to spend with his lover and said lover was acting as if he was being jilted.
“Maybe not, but not for lack of trying on his part,” Mulder spat.
“Oh my god!” Walter shook his head; he wasn’t going to have THIS argument with his lover. Not now, not tonight. “Mulder, who is in my home? Who just got out of my bed? Who is the only one ever in my bed with me? You, not John, not Kim, not anyone else. What is wrong with you?”
“Nothing is wrong with me, I’m just concerned that you don’t see what John’s doing. He’s trying to come between us.” Mulder accused.
“No, he isn’t. John is a subordinate who also happens to be a friend, nothing more. Look, I’ll call him and cancel the arrangements for tomorrow. Dana is out of town until Monday, we’ll spend the weekend together. Wouldn’t you like that?”
Walter wrapped his arms around Mulder, hugging him close, hoping to reassure him that Walter wanted only him.
“Yeah, yes, let’s do that. We can have a nice quiet weekend together. I think Scully said she’d be gone until late Monday night. I’ll text her and let her know that I didn’t want to be alone so I’ll be here with you when she gets back.”
“Okay, fine. I’ll go call John. I’m sure he’ll understand. It’s nothing too important.”
“Good.” Mulder smiled, pleased. He grabbed his phone to send the text message when it began to ring. “Mulder. Oh, hey Scully. Yeah, yeah. Oh, really. I see. Well, no, no I’ll meet you. Honestly, it’s okay I was just going to be hanging around the house all weekend alone anyway. Sure, okay, see you in a couple of hours then.”
Walter had frozen mid-step when Mulder answered his phone and was still just standing there, somewhat dumbfounded as he heard Mulder lie to Scully and just dismiss him like that.
“Sorry, Walter, Scully wants me to go up to Scarsdale and meet her there for this family thing. Guess her brother is harassing her about me never going to family reunions and sutff. I’ve got to run, she said there’s a train leaving DC in an hour. I need to catch it.”
“Wait! Mulder, I thought we… you hate those Scully family things, you never do go. We could just stay here all weekend. Call her back, be honest, tell her you don’t do the family thing, like you’ve always told me. Isn’t that what you usually say to her?” Walter knew he was pleading, that he sounded almost desperate but he really didn’t want Mulder to leave this time. He would get on his knees if he had to. He really couldn’t go on like this anymore.
“I can’t call her back. No, I said I’d meet her I have to go.”
“You said you’d spend the weekend with me!” Walter yelled, instantly regretting losing his temper. He knew this was all part of the deal that Dana Scully would come first, he was just tired of being used, tossed to the side, then picked up again when it was convenient for Mulder.
“Walter, I have to go. I can’t disappoint Scully.” Mulder whined
“But ME you can disappoint? It’s okay to break plans with ME to be with Scully? Even though you didn’t have plans with her to begin with?” Walter was humiliated. And tired. It was time to get off his knees, figuratively speaking. Time to stop begging for bits and pieces of a life. “You know what, Mulder. Go, go on. Meet your lover. Forget about your fuck buddy, he’ll be fine. But this is it. No more. Next time you want to leave her bed to come to mine, stay there, because I’m not available anymore. You can no longer give me what I need,” Walter stated coldly, truthfully. He was done.
“Walter! No, don’t be like this. You know, you knew when we started that Scully would come first.”
“Yes, and I accepted that then, but not anymore. You just spent five minutes ranting about John Doggett and how he was trying to steal me from you. Then Dana calls and you jump, not giving any thought to the fact that we’d just made our own plans. Hell, Mulder you lied to her, told her you were at home, going to be there all weekend, alone. Or you lied to me, when you said you’d text her and let her know you’d be here because you didn’t want to be alone all weekend.
“You know what, it doesn’t matter, anymore. I’m off my knees, I won’t beg This isn’t the life I want to live. Just go.” Walter walked into the bathroom and closed the door behind him.
“Walter, please don’t do this. I do need you; you do give me what I need,” Mulder pleaded. “I don’t want to leave it like this, please baby, come out.”
Walter snorted, Endearments weren’t what was needed here. He knew what was needed, what he needed. Finally. He fished his cell phone out of his pants pocket and hit the speed dial for John Doggett.
It rang twice before John answered. “John, hi, it’s Walter,” he spoke quietly. “Listen, I want to apologize for canceling on you today. I was wondering, if you still don’t have any plans for this evening, I could use a friend right about now.”
“You okay, Walt?”
“I will be, John. Listen, if you’re busy or annoyed at me, I’ll understand.”
“No, no, I’m on my way. Do I need to bring my shotgun or something?”
Walter laughed, “No, the way will be clear by the time you get here.”
“Fine, good. I’ll be there shortly, honest. And I won’t run out on you, Walt. I hope you know that,” John said with affection.
“Yeah, I think I finally got it all figured out, John. I’ll see you soon. Oh and don’t forget the Cuban, I haven’t eaten yet.”
“Sure thing.”
Walter hung up and then took a deep breath, steeling himself for the confrontation he was sure would occur once he opened the door. He shook his head when he discovered he was alone. Of course, Mulder wouldn’t stick around not to fight over a dead issue. At least, it was a dead issue in Walter’s mind.
He turned around and went back to the bathroom; he needed to shower then clean up the bedroom. Walter suspected that John had known what was going on between him and Mulder but there was no sense in ramming it in his face, especially if what Mulder said was true.
Not that Walter wanted to start anything with anyone else right now. But perhaps in the future.
Six months later:
“Did you forget your key again?” Walter laughed as he opened the door for his lover, only to swallow that laugh immediately when it wasn’t John on the other side.
“Mulder, I wasn’t expecting you.”
“Hi Walter, can I come in for a minute?”
“Umm, sure, yeah, sorry, where are my manners. Come in”
“Were you expecting company?”
“What? Oh, no. It’s just… well I thought you were John.”
“I see. Well, I won’t keep you. I just wanted to tell you that Scully and I aren’t together any longer. Seems she found out about you and I and decided that if I wasn’t happy with what she could give me, I needed to go and be with the one who could.”
“I’m… sorry. How did she find out? I mean we haven’t been in contact for six months. What did she mean…? I’m somewhat confused. Does Scully think that you and I are together now?”
Mulder had the good sense to blush. “Well, yeah. She’d been wondering where I’ve been going all the time in the past couple of months and I mentioned that it was the same place I’d been going for almost two years. I sort of implied that I was visiting you.”
“What? Why? I really am baffled here, Mulder. Why would Dana think we’ve seen each other at all over the past six months? I haven’t called you nor have you called me.”
“I implied… It doesn’t really matter, I suppose. I was going to see if you were busy, thought we could talk about us. What happened the last time we saw each other.”
Walter looked past Mulder and smiled slightly.
John Doggett stepped around Mulder and stood next to Walter, putting his arm around his lover.
“I see, well, you’re busy. I’ll just leave you be for now. Perhaps another time, Walter.”
“No, Mulder, there is no other time for us. There never really was an us, and the last time I saw you that was driven home hard. I’m happy now, I have what I need. I do hope some day you will find what you need. Perhaps Krycek is the best person for you, but you should tell Dana that it’s him you’ve been sleeping with for the past six months, not me. I’m not going to be the one who breaks it her, that’s your responsibility.”
Mulder hung his head down, turned away and left.
Walter waited for the pang of distress to hit, and when it didn’t, he realized he was really all right and with the person he should be.
Walter smiled at John again, gave him a one arm hug, and grabbed his bag. “Come on, those fish aren’t going to hang around waiting for us,” he said cheerfully as he led his lover out the door and into their future.
End
Oct 31 2008
Stay by Sugarland
I been sittin' here staring At the clock on the wall
And I been layin here praying Praying she won't call
It's just another call from home And you'll get it and be gone
And I'll be crying And I'll be beggin you baby
Beg you not to leave But I'll be left here waiting
With my heart on my sleeve Oh for the next time we'll be here
Seems like a million years And I think I'm dying
What do I have to do to make you see
She can't love you like me
Why don’t you stay Im down on my knees
Im so tired of being lonely Don't I give you what you need
When she calls you to go There is one thing you should know
We don’t have to live this way Baby why don’t you stay
You keep telling me baby There will come a time
When you will leave her arms And forever be in mine
But I don't think that's the truth And I don't like being used
And I'm tired of waiting It's too much pain to have to bare
To love a man you have to share
Why don’t you stay Im down on my knees
Im so tired of being lonely Don't I give you what you need
When she calls you to go There is one thing you should know
We don’t have to live this way Baby why don’t you stay
I can't take it any longer But my will is getting stronger
And I think I know just what I have to do
I can't waste another minute After all that I've put in it
I've given you my best Why does she get the best of you
So the next time you find You wanna leave her bed for mine
Why don’t you stay Im up off my knees
Im so tired of being lonely You can’t give me what I need
When she begs you not to go There is one thing you should know
I don’t have to live this way Baby why don’t you stay.