Work Text:
Legolas' Wild Ride
by Pirate Turner
Wide blue eyes peered out from green bushes at the passing forms. {What matter of magic is this?} he thought worriedly for he had never seen such things before. True, he had rarely been out of his forest home, but he had never even heard of such things as the creatures that currently zipped past him, roaring hungrily.
The Elf straightened his shoulders bravely. This route could provide a quicker way to their destination, and the sooner they could destroy the ring, the sooner all Mother Earth's children would be safe. A large white beast came by more slowly than the others, and Legolas leapt from the shrubbery as it neared. As the beast passed, he sailed onto its back only to nearly fall back to the hard, black ground again as he struggled to find a place to hold on.
Finally pulling himself onto what he mistook for the saddle and managing to hold on to the strange railing attached to the creature's back, he pressed his body against the beast and turned his head to look out at his bizarre surroundings. His blue eyes saw that the other beasts seemed to have slowed as many eyes were turned his way. He shrugged and smiled shyly back at the strangers, wondering why they were staring at him so. It was then that he felt the beast begin to change its direction, and he clung desperately to it as it turned.
"Oh my Gods!" a shrill screech erupted from the passenger. "You're not going to believe this, but Legolas just hitched a ride!"
"What?!" the driver exclaimed. She peered into the mirrors, trying desperately to catch a better look at the sexy figure that clung frantically to the van's back end. As she did so, temporarily forgetting about driving, the van suddenly spun out of control. She turned the wheel frantically first one way and then the next, trying to regain control before finally slamming on the brakes.
The monster suddenly roared so loudly that Legolas' heart, which up until now had only been hammering so loudly within his chest that he had began to fear his ear drums might bust, nearly flew out of his mouth. He leapt from the van and ran as if his very life depended on it until disappearing into the forest.
"Damn it!" the driver exclaimed, unbuckling her seatbelt. "We can't let him escape! This is a once in a lifetime opportunity!" Just as she began to open her door and jump out, the van nearly collided with a parked car, but she managed to swerve it just in time to narrowly miss the car. Looking back up into the mirror, she sighed as she realized that there was no longer any sign of him whatsoever.
Panting hard and fighting desperately to control his trembling form, Legolas finally arrived back at the others. Unable to remain standing any longer, he fell to the ground. His friends quickly surrounded him, their questions swirling too speedily about his mind for the panicked Elf to be able to keep a firm mental grip on even a single one of them. "I am never," he breathed slowly, "going on patrol again."
The Dwarf sneered down at him in disgust. "What in Sauron's eye hit you?"
"Nothing," Legolas admitted, still breathing hard, "but 'twas a narrow escape."
The Dwarf snorted. "I told you we shouldn't've sent the Elf. Look at 'im, tremblin' like a leaf! You'd never see a Dwarf like that!"
"Such brave words, Gimli," Legolas managed to speak, "but should you ever see a beast the likes of which I just witnessed -- let alone ride one -- you shall also shake just as badly. I was lucky to escape with my life." As Gimli continued to gripe, the others crowded around Legolas, wanting to know every detail of the nightmare he had just experienced.
"As we agreed upon, I went to investigate the possible shortcut, but of all the things we thought we might find on that road, none of them compared to the horror that I witnessed," Legolas began his tale as he rolled smoothly back to a standing position. "They ranged from size from no bigger than a Hobbit's hut to the size of young adult dragons." Each word the Elf said had the Hobbits hanging on for his next word and the others, except for Gimli, listening carefully in amazement. "The horrid scents that clogged the air not only made it hard to breathe but also smelled worse than an Orc. They were as fast as lightning and growled like a hungry Giant."
"H-How many of them were there?" one of the Hobbits managed to choke out, his eyes wide.
Legolas' hand passed through the air to emphasize his statement as he responded, "Their army stretched beyond what even my eyes could see."
"Did they attack you?" Frodo asked, his eyes once more scanning his friend for any sign of injuries.
Legolas looked away for a second. How could he tell his friends that he had been so foolish as to hitch an unrequested ride on one? He could hear their laughter now, but his code nonetheless demanded honesty to them. "I crept onto one of the beasts as I tried to see where they ended and what lay beyond them, and that was my mistake," he admitted, his head held proudly.
"Wh-What did it do?" Sam asked, barely managing to keep himself from trembling.
"It tried to shake me," he replied, "but I clung tightly. It continued to struggle against me with a fiery temper so great as to rival even Gimli here." The Dwarf snorted, but Legolas ignored him. "It was only when I realized it was about to eat me and I had no defense as I could not release my grip in order to grasp my bow that I finally made my escape."
"So ya ran away?" Gimli stated. He shook his head as he growled out, "Figures."
"I am no coward!" Legolas exclaimed sharply, whirling to face the Dwarf. "I am more than capable of taking you at any time, Dwarf."
"Come on then," Gimli challenged, stepping up to the Elf and gesturing for him to make the first move.
Shaking his head, Frodo bravely stepped between the two. "Enough, both of you. It is better to escape with one's life to fight again another day than to go ahead and die, and you have no right to condemn Legolas' actions, Gimli, until you have faced the same horrors he just did."
"Fine," the angry Dwarf snarled. "I'll go defeat Legolas' monsters, an' then I'll come back an' finish what's started here."
"You shall do no such thing, Gimli," the Ranger spoke firmly. "We have a mission that is more important than any little quarrel any of us might have with one another. Although that path may technically be a shortcut, to pass through such beasts as Legolas has described might well take a much longer time than our current path, so we shall continue the way we have begun."
Gimli started to argue but stopped when he saw the others' nodding in agreement. He glared once more at the Elf, muttered something underneath his breath, and then stomped off, continuing along their path. For once, he could not wait until this adventure was over.
Even as Legolas watched Gimli go, he wondered if the Dwarf might be right nonetheless. Had he indeed done the right thing or had he simply taken the coward's way out? He felt a hand clasp his shoulder, and his head turned to look up into Aragorn's eyes. "Come, my friend. Let us continue," the Ranger said simply, and the Elf nodded as they resumed their long trek through the forest.
The End