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Published:
2020-11-05
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2009-08-20
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9,441
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4/4
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Embracing the Inner McKay

Summary:


It's a fusion with SG-1, but not really an AU.  
It's McShep, but only pre-slash (sorry), and it's rated PG-13 only because of the pre-slashiness of it.
Summary: The plots of "Continuum" and "Crystal Skull" moved in together, bought matching pairs of footie pyjamas, got married and had a baby...and this is it.
Spoilers for season 5 of SGA and for Continuum and Crystal Skull (although, you don't need to have seen those to read this).
Disclaimer:  I really wish I owned the Stargate franchise, but I don't.  My writing is for fun, not profit, and no infringement was intended.

Chapter 1: Chapter 1

Chapter Text


Embracing the Inner McKay
by Neena

It was never a good sign when the first thing you saw upon waking up was an IV drip leading into your arm. Major John Sheppard groaned and started doing a check of all his body parts. Arms and legs were intact and felt contusion-free. There were no odd pains in his chest or stomach and a quick check further south confirmed that his boys were still there; although he’d have to take them for a test drive later to be sure everything was in working order.

The only things that seemed to be wrong with him was a killer headache and a very fuzzy recollection of how he’d ended up in the infirmary in the first place.

His groan alerted a man who’d been pacing around at the foot of his bed. John didn’t recognise him, but he was wearing the science blues of the Atlantis Expedition, so he figured he must be one of the new recruits.

“Oh thank God you’re awake! It’s about time! Do you have any idea how messed up this is?” the man ranted, his arms gesticulating madly as he continued to pace. “While we were off-world the whole city went nuts on us! Caldwell has taken command—which is marginally better than having Woolsey in charge, I’ll grant you that—but it’s still weird. And I can’t find Teyla anywhere; it’s like she’s disappeared! Keller looks like she’s one band-aid away from a mental collapse, and Carter’s come back with Dr. Jackson in tow. But that’s not the half of it!

“Since we got back, it’s like I’ve become invisible or something. Everyone’s acting like they can’t see or hear me, and if it’s some kind of practical joke, then all of Atlantis is in on it. Hang on—you can see me, right”

Sheppard stared at the man in awe. He’d never heard anyone talk that fast in his life—it was quite the talent, really. Too bad the guy was clearly insane, because John got the impression he might be a fun guy to hang out with.

“Oh great! You can’t see me, either. That’s...that’s just great,” the scientist muttered, and his face crumpled in despair.

John took pity on him. “Relax, I can see you just fine,” he said. “Now, you mind telling me who you are?”

The pacing abruptly stopped and the man’s blue eyes went wide as he gaped at John. “No, no, no, no, no, no...don’t do that, Sheppard. Not even in jest—it’s not funny.”

John stared back at him blankly, wondering if maybe he should know this guy. After all, he appeared to know John. Maybe the headache and fuzzy memories were signs of head trauma. Maybe he had amnesia.

John did a quick scan of his memory to check for blank spots. He had a brother named David; his parents, Robert and Angela, were now both deceased; he was a special-ops-trained pilot with the USAF, third in command of the Atlantis expedition in the Pegasus Galaxy; the Wraith were the bad guys; and he’d had toast and scrambled eggs for breakfast.

Yep. His memory checked out fine, and nowhere did this nut-job of a scientist make an appearance. So either his amnesia was highly localised, or he’d never actually met the guy before.

As John watched, the other man’s face fell, one corner of his expressive mouth drooping lower than the other as he seemed to realise that John wasn’t having him on. John almost felt sorry for him, and he felt like he should say something reassuring, but he had no idea what you were supposed to say to a guy who believed he was invisible.

Luckily, Dr. Keller picked that moment to check in on him. Remembering what the Invisible Man had said about Keller, John took a close look at her as she took his vitals. Funny that he’d never before noticed the lines etched around her mouth or the deepening creases in her forehead. Or the way her eyes looked pained and yet dull at the same time. The crazy guy was right—she did look like she was on the verge of cracking. He made a mental note to have a talk with Caldwell about ordering Keller to take a few days off.

“You doing okay, Doc?” he asked, watching her jot down a few notes onto his chart with absent-minded proficiency.

Keller looked up from her task with mild surprise, which quickly resolved into a soft smile. It had been a while since he’d seen her smile, John realised. It had been a long time since anyone on the Atlantis Expedition had had cause to smile, he thought sadly.

“I’m fine, she answered, giving his hand a friendly pat, but the truth was, she looked worn out. John nodded back, willing to let it slide for now.

“Good,” he said. “Then can I ask you something?”

“Sure. What’s up?” Keller asked good-naturedly and leaned in closer, as if she wouldn’t be able to hear him otherwise.

“That guy over there,” John said, nodding in the stranger’s direction. “Do I know him? Because I’m drawing a blank, here.”

Keller looked in the direction he’d indicated and frowned. “You mean Dr. Gellar?” she asked, perplexed, and John noticed that Dr. Gellar—whom he knew in passing—was in fact milling around at the far end of the infirmary in roughly the same direction he’d pointed.

“See what I mean?” said the stranger, waving his hands furiously in front of Keller’s face. John had to admit that she did seem oblivious to his presence.

“No, not Gellar,” John said patiently to Keller. “The other guy.”

Keller looked around again, her large eyes scanning the room and passing over the man more than once without pausing. “What other guy?” she asked, sounding completely sincere.

“The guy standing right in front of you,” John answered, starting to get a little annoyed. “Science geek, ‘bout my height, stocky build, balding...”

“Hey! I am so not balding!” the man protested.

“...talks a lot,” John added. “You sure you don’t see him?”

Keller looked at him with that concerned expression of hers that invariably meant he was in for a whole slew of tests.

“Major, there’s nobody there,” Keller said in a calming, ‘don’t upset the mentally-unbalanced man’ kind of way. “I didn’t see any obvious injuries when you were admitted, but...you didn’t happen to hit your head on your last mission, did you?”

Sheppard’s eyes lit up. “As a matter of fact, I think maybe I did. My memory’s a bit fuzzy about what happened on that planet, and I’ve got one hell of a migraine.”

“Hello! I am not a hallucination! And why’d she call you ‘Major’?” the hallucination snapped at him.

“You are a hallucination, and she called me ‘Major’ because that’s my rank,” John responded.

“Since when?” the man asked.

“Since I was promoted in 2002. And you aren’t real, so why am I even talking to you?”

“I am real, Colonel, the man said emphatically. “If I wasn’t real, would I be able to touch you?” he asked, and proceeded to reach over and grip John’s blanket-covered foot in his hand.

John stared up at him in shock and then shifted his gaze to Keller, whose eyes were volleying between John and the patch of empty space next to her where he’d been directing his comments.

“Can hallucinations touch people?” he asked her.

“Of course I can touch you—I’m real! You need to start focusing on what’s important here—namely me, and finding a way to make me visible again.”

“Shut up—I’m not talking to you,” Sheppard said out of the corner of his mouth before turning his attention fully on Keller.

She shifted her eyes again uncertainly and waited until she was sure John was ready to hear her answer. “In some cases of head injury it’s possible for the brain to conjure up very realistic visual, auditory and tactile hallucinations.”

“Mm. That’s true,” said the figment of John overactive imagination. “When I was hallucinating about Carter that time I got trapped in a puddle jumper at the bottom of the ocean, the kiss we shared felt very, very real.”

“You hallucinated that you kissed Colonel Carter in a puddle jumper?” John asked incredulously, his lips twisting in distaste at the dreamy expression on the other man’s face.

Keller smirked a little at John. “Let me get this straight,” she said. “Your hallucination is telling you about something that it hallucinated about?”

John smiled crookedly back at her. “What can I say? I’m a very complex kind of guy.”

His hallucination snorted. “Please! You’re about as complex as a ‘connect the dots’ puzzle.”

“Hey! You’re my hallucination, so would you ease up on the insults, buddy?”

“I only insult people when they’re behaving like idiots. And would you stop with the ‘hallucination’ thing already? I’m a real person—I do have a name, you know.”

“Oh yeah? And what is it?” John asked argumentatively.

“It’s Rodney. Dr. Rodney McKay, PHD. Double PHD, actually.”

John smirked in Keller’s direction. “Get this,” he said. “My hallucination’s name is Dr. Rodney McKay!”

Keller’s eyes sparkled with amusement. “Next he’ll be telling you he’s related to Dr. Jeannie McKay,” she said with a soft chuckle.

“She’s my sister!” Rodney jumped in, right on cue. “She’s my little sister.”

John snorted out a laugh. “He says she’s his little sister,” he told Keller. “Looks a bit like her, too, now that I come to think of it—though he’s not nearly as pretty to look at. He even has the same temperament as her,” he added.

“Okay, Major," said Keller, slipping back into doctor mode, “it’s time to tell Rodney that visiting hours are over. I need to take you for an MRI.”

“I’m invisible, not deaf,” Rodney retorted uselessly.

“You heard the lady, Rodney—time to say goodbye.” John squeezed his eyes shut, willing his hallucination to disappear, but when he cracked an eye open a moment later the annoying Dr. McKay was still there. Only now he looked both smug and amused.

“Feel better now? Get that out of your system? I'm real!” Rodney practically shouted. “If you don’t believe me, just ask Jeannie—she’ll know who I am.”

“Maybe I will,” John threatened.

“Good. Go ahead,” Rodney tossed back.

“Don’t think I won’t,” John warned again.

Keller sighed. “He’s still there, huh?”

“Yeah,” John complained. “And he’s making my headache worse. Think you could give me something to make it go away?” he asked as Keller ushered him into a wheelchair.

“That depends,” she replied with a sly smile. “Which one do you want me to get rid of, the headache or the hallucination?”

“I think they’re one and the same,” John retorted drily.

“Now that just hurts,” Rodney grumbled and followed along behind them.

 

 

end part 1