Work Text:
Uniform Nights
by Python
Wojo let himself into his apartment, followed by Dietrich. He immediately took off his uniform jacket and loosened his tie, while complaining about how uncomfortable he'd been all day.
Dietrich took off his jacket and sat on the sofa. He leaned his head back and closed his eyes. He'd been listening to Wojo bitch for the better part of an hour.
Wojo tapped his lover on the shoulder, "Are you listening to me?"
Dietrich nodded.
"Don't you have anything to say?" Wojo asked.
Dietrich shook his head.
"Why are you ignoring me?"
"I'm not," Dietrich answered, "I've heard everything you said."
Wojo sat down next to the other man. He began playing with Dietrich's tie, "Do you believe that stuff with Barney and Harris today?"
"I wasn't surprised that Harris didn't want to wear the uniform."
"I know but he should have to live through it just like the rest of us," Wojo said. Dietrich hadn't moved and Wojo straddled his lap and began nipping at his neck.
"That's why the captain made Harris change and I have to admit, Harris looked good in the uniform," Dietrich answered.
Wojo stopped what he was doing and sat up, "Oh really."
Dietrich looked at Wojo and grinned, "Yeah."
"Better than me?"
"That's tough to say," Dietrich answered and he meant it. The uniform worked well on both men.
"Oh come on."
"Woj..."
"Fine then," Wojo said, got up and went towards the phone.
"What are you doing?" Dietrich asked.
"We're gonna settle this," Wojo answered.
Dietrich crossed his arms and listened to Wojo inviting Harris over. Then Wojo sat down again and turned on the tv, ignoring everything else. He jumped up when there was a knock at the door.
Wojo let Harris in, "Thanks for comin'."
"No problem but why did you insist that I wear the uniform?" Harris asked.
Wojo looked at Dietrich and answered, "We just need you to help us settle something." Then he put the tie and jacket on again.
Harris watched this and glanced from Wojo to Dietrich, "What exactly are you two trying to settle?"
"I wanna know which one of us looks better in the uniform," Wojo answered.
Harris grinned, "You can't be serious." In his mind there was no contest, "And who's gonna be judging this?"
Wojo pointed to Dietrich, "He is."
"Really?"
Wojo nodded and grabbed Harris's arm and they stood in front of Dietrich.
"You really wanna go through with this?" Dietrich asked.
"Yeah."
"Go ahead Arthur," Harris added. There was no doubt in his mind as to who would win this contest.
"Ok," Dietrich said. He crossed his arms over his chest and looked both men up and down. He didn't say anything for a few minutes.
"Are you gonna make up your mind already?" Wojo snapped.
"Give the man time," Harris answered in an amused tone.
"Would you two please turn around," Dietrich said. The other two did as they were asked and Dietrich stroked his chin. This was a tough decision.
Finally Dietrich stood up, "Well, I've made up my mind."
The other two turned to face him and Wojo prompted, "Well?"
Dietrich looked at the floor, "Harris."
"What?" Wojo asked in a deflated voice.
Harris patted Wojo on the shoulder, "Sorry man but you were up against some stiff competition." Then he took a couple steps back to see what would happen.
Wojo stepped closer to Dietrich, "I can't believe you didn't pick me."
"You wanted me to be honest didn't you?"
"No."
"I'm sorry. I was insensitive," Dietrich answered, "Oh stop pouting."
Harris watched all of this with great interest. He couldn't suppress his grin but he wasn't going to say anything yet. He didn't want to get in the middle of a lover's quarrel.
"But you have one thing Harris doesn't," Dietrich said, trying to smooth things over.
"Oh yeah? What's that?" Wojo asked.
"You have a nice butt."
Wojo grinned, "Damn you."
"Why?"
"No matter how hard I try, I can't stay mad at you," Wojo answered.
"That's a good thing," Dietrich replied.
"So what now?" Harris asked.
Wojo turned to face Harris, pulled Dietrich's arms around his waist, and answered, "I'm gonna let Dietrich have his way with me."
Dietrich rested his chin on Wojo's shoulder and smiled.
Harris nodded, "That sounds like a good plan. You two mind if I join in?"
Wojo looked over his shoulder at Dietrich who shrugged his shoulders and said, "It's fine with me."
Wojo turned his gaze back to Harris, "I don't know. You already beat me in our little contest."
"It would be fun," Harris said.
"All right," Wojo answered and turned to face Dietrich, "But you'd better remember that you're mine."
Dietrich smiled, "I'll never forget."
Harris heard Wojo's last statement and said, "Only if you're sure."
"I'm sure," Wojo answered, "But you'd better be ready for the night of your life." He started walking towards the bedroom, "Maybe we should have a contest as to who looks better without the uniform."
end