SquidgeWorld Archive

Title: The end of the life as you know it
Author: Anonymus
Beta: the wonderful Val, aka Danceswithgary
Rating: R
Challenge #24 "3. Mr. and Mrs. Kent, excuse me while I kill your son."
Summary: Clark had a big secret but Lex finds out about it.



The baby was sweet.

There was no other way to put it. A sweet little baby girl with black hair and baby-blue eyes, wrapped up in light-pink blankets, resting in a little basket. A pacifier was laying next to her, with the words "Daddy's sunshine" on it.

Lex frowned.

Then he looked around. Left. Right. No one was there. Carefully, he took a step outside, and glanced around.

"Hello?" he called out. No answer.

He looked down at the baby that gurgled peacefully. She wasn't very old. Two weeks at the most. He bent down next to her. "Hey, you," he said gently. Those incredibly big eyes turned towards him, and two tiny hands, curled in fists, that seemed to reach out for him. It was then that he saw the note.

And sighed.

Okay. This wasn't the first baby showing up on his doorstep. Normally, they were accompanied by their respective mothers, demanding money from him to take care of his child.

None of those babies had EVER been his. He highly doubted that this one was an exception, but the note was something new. He took it and unfolded it carefully.

"I'm Marian. Please, take care of me. My other parent can't."

That was it.

Marian.

Again, he looked down at her. She was cute, sweet, and beautiful.

And he wondered exactly how long it would take the mother to follow her up, and ask for his money. But, first things first. He pulled out his cell, called his office, and cancelled all schedules for the day. Then he made an appointment at a child's doctor. He wanted to make sure the little one was all right.

With soft, cooing noises, he lifted the basket, and went inside again.

Across from the door at the other side of the castle, a pair of green eyes closed, almost as if in pain. A heartbeat later, they were gone.

~*~

"So. Is she mine?"

Dr. Mellner smiled at the baby in his arms, and nodded. "Without any doubt, Mr. Luthor. This little precious here is definitely yours."

Then he frowned, and involuntarily, Lex frowned, too. "What?"

Dr. Mellner looked down the chart on his desk. "There is something very strange about the mother's DNA."

"Is she sick?" That would explain the baby on his doorsteps. A sick mother wouldn't be able to care for the child. But the doctor shook his head.

"No. The baby is perfectly healthy. It's just ... I can't identify the second DNA. It's very strange. Almost ... alien. I'll have to send it to another lab. Maybe they'll be able to help ...."

"No!"

Dr. Mellner looked up. "Excuse me?"

Lex took the baby out of Mellner's arms, and cradled her gently. "I said no. You will not send her DNA throughout the land. She is mine. That is all I needed to know. So please, hand me the files and everything you have on her."

Dr. Mellner looked as confused as he no doubt felt, but without another word, he handed the file over. Lex took it, thanked the doctor, and left.

It was in the limousine that he realized that he had almost held his breath. With a sigh, he reached for his cell again, and called the castle. There were certain things that needed to be done.

~*~

A hand on his shoulder once gave him comfort. The presence of his mother used to calm his troubled soul. A pat from his father used to make him proud ... sometimes, even cheer him up. Made dark things look a little less dark.

But not this time.

He sat alone in the barn. Every attempt of his parents to lighten his mood had been cut off by him. He was wounded. Inside. Deeply. And just for once, he wanted to wallow in his grief. Silent tears were running down his face. The shouting had subsided. He had flown to the Rockies, and had yelled, cried, shouted, until his voice had broken, and he couldn't say anything at all anymore. Now he was simply crying.

"Clark, I .... "

"No, Mom," he interrupted her before she could go on. "Just ... leave me alone, okay?"

"Are you sure?"

He nodded, and could hear her leaving. It wouldn't take long, and his father ....

"Son?"

...would try to talk to him. With a sigh, he bowed his head. "Dad. Please."

"It was just ...."

He jumped up before his father could finish the sentence. "WHAT?" he yelled. "THE BEST FOR HER?"

He slumped down again, as if this few words had taken all of his strength away. "I can't hear it anymore, Dad. Just leave me alone. Go. I ... have to think."

He could hear his father's heartbeat. He knew that he was still standing on the top of the stairs, waiting for him to turn around. To say sorry. To say SOMETHING. But he didn't. He took his old place by the window, and looked out into the darkness. After a few minutes, he heard the noise of the steps as his father made his way downwards.

For the best.

How often had he heard those words in the last few months? You can't keep her. What would the people say? What would Lex say? What about your secret? Go to the fortress. Ask Jor-El what you can do against it.

He had gone to the fortress. Had flown up to the arctic. Only to be told by Jor-El that he should be happy. That is was rare for a male Kryptonian to be this deeply in love with someone that he was able to conceive a child. That those Kryptonians were highly valued on Krypton.

But that was the point, wasn't it? He WASN'T on Krypton. He was on Earth. And down here, a pregnant male was a freak. Not a hero.

Marian.

He thought back to his daughter. It had been too late to abort the child growing inside him. He was too far along. He was almost in the fourth month, and Kryptonian pregnancies used to be only six months. He had flown home, his height a clear advantage in this case for no one noticed the additional twenty pounds he put on. He had wanted to talk to Lex. He was the baby's father after all. But he couldn't. The last time he went to the castle, Lex seduced him with sweet words, soft touches and whispered promises until he was unable to remember his own name. He hadn't been there ever since.

Then Marian was born. Her mother had been at his side when his body suddenly developed a new opening through which Marian came into this world. Two hours later, everything was back to normal so to speak and he was the sobbing, desperate father of a tiny, wailing baby girl. He remembered her angelic little face. Her blue eyes. He had smiled through his tears when he had seen her black hair. Just like his.

Now she was gone.

She was with the only man who had the resources to protect the half alien child. He was certain that the first thing Lex would arrange would be a paternity test. As soon as Lex found out that she was truly his, he would protect her with his life.

That didn't lessen the pain he felt or relieve the emptiness inside where about three weeks earlier Marian had been.

With a sob, he broke down again. He wanted her back. He missed her so much that it almost tore him apart.

And yet he knew that there was no way he would ever see her again.

~*~

The bottle was ready as soon as Marian opened her eyes and started to wail. Very carefully, Lex took her out of the cradle, and changed her diaper. Over the last few weeks, he had become kind of an expert at that, and about three minutes later, Marian was resting in the crook of his arm with the milk bottle in her little hands, drinking peaceful.

She was three months old now, and Lex still wasn't any closer in finding out the identity of her mother. He had made a list of all the woman he'd had unprotected sex with about a year ago, and had been surprised at the outcome.

Zero. None.

Not because he hadn't had sex at all, but because the ONLY sex he'd had in the last year had been with a man. A man he hadn't seen in a while. A man he missed fiercely.

Clark.

Apparently, he'd heard about the new member of his household, and instead of talking to him, and letting him explain things which were, considered closely, pretty much unexplainable he had most certainly jumped to the conclusion that Lex had cheated on him.

So he hadn't seen him since ... well, it had been a while. It was the first time that Lex had the time to think. To REALLY think. Marian was his. No power on earth would be able to take her away from him. No judge would DARE to do so.

Her mother didn't want her. He loved her. So!

Clark.

He hadn't seen Clark since about two weeks before Marian had shown up. And their last meeting had been a bit ... strange, now that he thought back to it. Clark had wanted to tell him something. But Lex had been too preoccupied in seducing his beautiful farmer to really listen to him. One year plus or minus one week they'd been together by then, and still he couldn't get enough of this man. So he had more or less jumped him, never listening to what Clark was really saying.

Except for later, when the 'Lex, we need to talk' had turned to 'God, Lex, don't stop'. He really should go over on the next weekend. He could hand Marian to the Kents, and maybe that way he could have a few moments with Clark. Preferably alone.

The bottle was empty, and with a happy smile Marian looked up at him. Gently, he lifted her up, put her over his shoulder, and rubbed her back until the air in her stomach came out with a loud burp. He smiled when he laid her down again. She was asleep within a few minutes. He stood by her cradle for a long time, simply looking at her.

She was a miracle. Simply a miracle. A dream come to life. Now if he just could add Clark into this equation, he would be the happiest man on earth.

He went back to his own bed that was only a few feet away, and pulled his covers up again. Listening to Marian's soft breathing lulled him into sleep. In the last waking moment, he thought he saw a movement at the window, but when he turned his head, there was nothing.

~*~

She was as beautiful as he had remembered her. Her hair had grown a little, and he would LOVE to see the color of her eyes. Her mother had said that babies usually had blue eyes and that in most of the cases the color changed. Had her eyes changed? Would they ever? Or were they still blue and would stay that way?

He didn't dare to float closer, afraid to be detected by one of Lex's alarm systems. He found it adorable that Lex had put the baby's bed in his own bedroom. Wistfully, he glanced at the bed that held so many memories. He thought back to the first time they'd made love in that bed. He wondered in which night Marian had been conceived. And a slow, sad smile skittered over his face in which room, for they had christened almost every room of the castle.

Marian moved in her sleep, and his heart cried out for her. He fled before he could do anything stupid.

Flew away into the night.

Never noticing that Lex woke up with a start as Marian started to cry in the exact moment that Clark was out of reach.

~*~

The car that stopped in front of the Kent's house was as different from the usual Lex Luthor car as it could ever be. It was a deep-red truck, and with a start Clark realized that it was the truck Lex had bought for him so many years ago. The gift he'd had to give back by orders of his father.

Lex had kept it.

Clark was stunned, and slowly walked outside. But before he reached the car, he could feel it. Could feel her. There was still the connection between himself and Marian, and he could sense every single heartbeat of her, could hear the blood pumping through her veins. It took him all of his willpower not to run over, tear the car's door off its hinges, and pull the baby out.

It didn't help that he visited her almost every night. He watched Lex care for her, feeding her, changing her diaper, even singing her to sleep, and every night he died inside a little more.

It should be him doing all of these things for his daughter. Him, not Lex. Or they should be able to take turns. He walked over to Lex who was busy unstrapping his daughter from the child's seat.

"Hey, Lex." He greeted Lex, though his eyes never left Marian.

Her eyes were still blue. As blue as Lex's. And without thinking, he blurted out, "She has your eyes."

Lex's gaze was proud when he answered, "Yes, she does. Isn't she a beauty?"

Clark wanted to hold her but he didn't dare. He was afraid that once he had her in his arms he would be unable to let go of her. So he simply stared at her.

And she looked back at him. Her gaze was unwavering, unusually intense for a baby her age. Must be her Kryptonian half, Clark thought without humor.

"Wow. I've never seen her look like that before," Lex murmured. And Clark had to pull himself together to keep from laughing hysterically. Of course not. Because Lex had never seen Marian look at her father before. Her mother. He sighed quietly. Her ... whatever.

"Why are you here, Lex?" he asked, suddenly feeling very tired.

Lex frowned slightly. Apparently, he had expected a warmer welcome. "I'm here to see you, Clark."

Clark cocked his head slightly and said nothing.

Lex shifted Marian in his arms, and said quietly, "I've missed you, love. You haven't been to the castle for over four months now. And you know the saying about the mountain and Mohammed."

Clark didn't know how to reply. His head knew that he had to tell Lex to go, that he should send him away, scare him off, tell him to go to hell and never come back.

His heart gave a happy flip, sang in joy and woke up the butterflies in his stomach, which immediately started a crazy dance.

His heart won.

He reached out his hand, stroked the soft cheek of his daughter tenderly, and gestured to the house. "Come in. I'm sure Mom would love to see Ma ... the baby." Not, he added in his mind.

He turned around, not caring if Lex and his daughter followed him.

They did.

But Clark missed the thoughtful expression that crossed Lex's face.

~*~

Something was wrong!

Lex could almost smell it in the air. His lover was acting weird. More than weird. Slowly, he followed Clark to the house where Martha would be waiting inside, probably with freshly brewed coffee and a still-warm apple pie.

But something in his lover's behavior was puzzling. And in Marian's, too. Never before had he seen his daughter staring at someone like that. She was a sweet, quiet child. People came into his office all the day, and nearly no one left without looking into the crib where Marian lay, touching her hand, stroking her cheek or making some soft noises.

She accepted it but never reacted in any other way that babies normally do.

The way she had stared at Clark had irritated Lex. It had almost scared him. Now she was back to gurgling and making soft noises.

It was just as Clark opened the door that Lex suddenly realized Clark's little glitch. What was it he had said? 'I'm sure Mom wants to see Ma ... the baby.' Or something like that.

He had almost said Marian. How could he possibly know his daughter's name? He hadn't mentioned it before, had he?
Or was the gossip in town so good that not only his fatherhood but also his daughter's name was common knowledge?

He didn't know what to think about this whole situation, but he realized that just being near Clark again made him feel so much better.

In the kitchen, it was just as Lex had predicted, including Martha's joy on seeing Marian. Before he could react, she had taken the baby out of his arms and was carrying her through the kitchen, all the while talking to her, explaining to her what it was exactly she was doing, and why she was doing it.

Within a few minutes, the table was set despite her being able to use only one hand the pie was ready, the coffee mugs filled. They sat down together but before Lex could even take the fork in his hand, the front door opened again, and Jonathan came in.

He saw Lex, looked accusingly at Clark who only shrugged almost helplessly gazed at the baby in his wife's arms ... and suddenly something happened to him. His expression softened, he smiled, walked over to Martha, and took Marian from her. He gently rested her in the crook of his arm, played little hide-and-seek games with her and her blanket, and seemed to forget about the rest of the people in the kitchen.

For a few moments, Lex had the feeling as if he had stepped into some kind of twilight zone. He expected the big bad monster to come out every second now.

But on the other hand, it was the best thing that could have happened. With a blink, a little nod in the vague direction of the barn, and a smile to Martha, he managed to lure his lover away from the family who was busy telling Marian that she was the sweetest baby ever, and wasn't she just a cutie, and didn't her hair look exactly like a raven's wing ...

Lex would have rolled his eyes, if he didn't already do the same every waking hour he spent with Marian.

~*~

Up in the barn, Clark walked over to the window. He wanted to tell Lex with kind words that they couldn't see each other any more. That it was impossible for them to ever have sex again. If need be, he would even lie and tell him that he didn't love him any more. After all, it wouldn't be the first lie he'd ever told him.

But then he felt Lex's arms around his waist, felt the way he rested his head between his shoulder blades in this unique, trusting gesture that was so un-Luthor-like that Clark loved him a bit more every time the older man did this.

With a deep sigh, he put his hands over Lex's and moved just the few centimeters back that brought him in full-body contact with his lover.

"I've missed you, Clark."

A small whisper, barely audible although it was totally quiet in the barn. Clark didn't think ... he just reacted, and answered, "I missed you, too."

"Why didn't you come to talk to me, love?"

Love. Clark closed his eyes against the pain in his heart. Suddenly, he knew that he couldn't do it. He had fought so hard to be allowed inside Lex's life ... he simply couldn't just give it up. He wanted to say something, but Lex continued without waiting for an answer.

"I knew that you had to be ... angry ... because you must think that I cheated on you. And I know that this sounds highly unbelievable, but you have to believe me when I tell you I didn't. I never would hurt you like this."

It took three tries before Clark gathered enough courage and spit to ask, "Did you ... did you have a blood test? Is she really yours?"

A little voice inside Clark's head was laughing hysterically at this question. He simply ignored it.

"I did."

He did? Did what? Oh yes ... the blood test.

"And?"

Did you find your DNA? Did you find mine? Did you notice something is off with our daughter's DNA because she's half alien? Half Kryptonian?

"She is mine. There is no doubt about that. But ..."

"But?"

He could feel a kiss through the cotton of his shirt, and barely suppressed a shiver as he remembered the feeling of those lips on his skin.

"But there was something strange. Weird. The doctor couldn't quite place the second DNA."

With a sigh close to resignation, he asked the question he knew that was expected from him. "Did your doctors at your labs find out whose DNA it was?"

The arms vanished, leaving Clark feeling bereft. A heartbeat later, Lex stood next to him. "I took the samples they had taken from Marian, said a very nice thank you to the doctor and left. I never gave them to another lab."

Clark could feel his jaw drop down, and the question came out before his mind was able to stop it. "Why not?"

He winced. Oh yes, Kent ... very clever. But once again, Lex managed to surprise him. "I don't know where Marian comes from. I don't know anything about her heritage. And I don't care. For all I know she could have fallen from the sky and somehow managed to alter her DNA to fit mine, so I would take care of her. I simply don't care. She's my daughter and that's all I need to know. I love her, and I will fight tooth and nail if anyone tries to take her away from me."

Clark felt a tear escape and cursed himself for this open display of emotion. He thought that he had left that behind when the pregnancy was over.

Apparently not.

Even worse ... Lex saw it, too.

Bad.

Very bad.

"Clark, what is it? Look ... I don't know what to say. I don't know how to explain Marian to you. But you have to believe me that I never cheated on you."

"I know, Lex ... I know," he sighed.

Was that his voice? He sounded like a rusty old drainpipe.

"You do?"

Surprise colored his lover's voice, and despite the pain in his chest, Clark had to smile. He turned around to face Lex who was still standing next to him, and simply nodded. How could he explain it anyway? He was glad that Lex didn't ask WHY he accepted it so easily.

"Thank God." Lex sighed, and then he moved closer and kissed Clark. Clark's first reaction was to push Lex away but the second he felt those warm, long-missed lips on his own, all rational thought flew out the window with a never-come-back-wave. He gave in to Lex. Gave in to the love, the desire he felt and that he'd denied for such a long time. The kiss deepened, grew in its passion, and after what felt like forever, yet never enough, Clark separated himself from his lover. He felt Lex's hands on his face, stroking him softly, caressing him while Lex murmured sweet nonsense, told him again and again how much he loved him how much he had missed him and that he would never ever under any circumstances allow Clark to leave him. And for just one moment, Clark silenced his rationality, and believed everything Lex told him wholeheartedly.

"Come to the castle tonight, Clark, please."

Lex's voice penetrated Clark's sexual haze, and without realizing it, he nodded. The answering smile he got was blinding. "Come at nine. Marian will be asleep by then."

Another nod, and after one final, hard kiss Lex turned around and left. Clark seemed to be unable to move. He simply stood at the barn's window, gazing out at Lex who just came out of the house, Marian in his arms. His parents stood in the door, looking after him, watching as he strapped his daughter in her seat, got in and drove off.

And as soon as Lex was out of sight, all of his strength seemed to leave Clark, and he tumbled down with a groan.

He had just agreed to meet with Lex tonight.

And apart from the fact that his parents would yell at him until his super hearing went berserk ... he just had proved that one kiss from Lex was all it took to change him from an intelligent, rational-thinking alien into a quivering mass of desire and hormones.

He was SO lost.

~*~

Clark shook his head slightly. Wow. He had never thought that the voice of his mother could get *that* shrill. It would take hours for his ears to stop ringing. Super hearing wasn't exactly an advantage right then. His father had simply looked at him. Looked at him with that special expression that was reserved for the moments when Clark did something really, really stupid. Like agreeing to meet Lex again after he had just given birth to his lover's baby and had promised his parents to never, ever, see him again.

He sighed as he pushed the security code into the lock of the gate. The gate opened, and he was glad and a little surprised that his codes were still working.

The closer he came to the house, the more he could feel Marian. Asleep, huh? Not by a long shot, he thought wryly. The manor was quiet when he entered it. Slowly, he made his way upstairs, following the sound of Lex's heartbeat. When he entered Lex's office, he stood there for a moment, reveling in the picture that saw.

Lex was wearing jeans and a simple blue button-down shirt. Over his right shoulder, was a cloth to protect his shirt if Marian tried to get rid of her dinner. On said cloth was Marian, resting happily on Lex's shoulder. Her blue eyes were wide open and she gnawed on one of her little fists while her other hand played with the cloth.

Then she saw Clark, and suddenly she moved restlessly, trying to get away from Lex and to him. She got very excited, made happy noises, even some that sounded suspiciously like ma-ma. Or maybe that was just his wishful thinking combined with his imagination.

Lex turned around, his face a mixture of happiness and despair. "Clark, I'm sorry," were his first words. "Usually Marian is asleep at this time. I don't know why she's still awake. I've laid her down at least a dozen times. As soon as I leave the room, she starts to cry so loud that you'd think someone was trying to kill her."

Clark walked closer, and without his volition, he reached out his hands. "May I try it?"

Without hesitating, Lex handed him the baby. Immediately, she started to play with his dark hair. Lex smiled. "That is something she must have from me," he said. Then he pointed to the stairs. "Her bed is in my room."

Clark bit his tongue to hold the "I know" in. He succeeded.

He followed Lex to his bedroom, his lithe frame filling his eyes as he walked upstairs behind Lex. He could feel his body respond. He sighed quietly. This was pure torture. They managed to reach Lex's bedroom without Clark embarrassing himself.

It was the first time he had been in the room since their last ... encounter. He swallowed another sigh, and laid Marian down gently. She looked up at him, smiling, and then she yawned widely. Another look, then her eyes drifted shut, and within seconds, she was asleep.

Clark stood next to her bed, gazing down at her, a strange feeling in his chest. An arm snuck around his waist, a familiar body pressed close to his, a chin came to rest on his shoulder.

It was something he could really get used to.

"Let's go," breathed Lex after a few moments in his ear. Clark shivered but followed Lex out of the bedroom. They were silent on their way downstairs. Back in the living room, Clark sat down in his usual place while Lex fixed them both a drink.

"I know what you want to ask right now, Clark." Lex said while pouring the liquid into the tumblers.

No, I don't think you do, Clark thought wryly.

"You want to ask who the mother is. How it can be that there suddenly is a baby with my DNA when there was no one else but you for over a year now."

Lex turned around, walked over to Clark, handed him his glass, took a sip from his own, and sat down next to him.

"The truth is ..."

At that moment, an alarm went off. A bumping noise came from the bedroom where Marian was supposed to sleep peacefully.

Before Clark could think, he'd supersped into Marian's room, for once forgetting everything about hiding his abilities.

Less than two seconds later, he stood in the bedroom door, staring open-mouthed at the baby. It took Lex a few seconds more before he arrived. He looked at Clark with an obvious question in his eyes, a question he chose to ignore. Then Lex followed Clark's gaze, and the dumbfounded expression on his face matched Clark's.

~*~

The alarm that had gone off had been the motion sensors in this room. Lex had them installed in case someone tried to break in and hurt his little baby girl. He'd been stunned when Clark had practically disappeared on him the second the alarm went off. One moment he was there, the next he wasn't.

Lex had taken off after him. Panting a little it was two flights of stairs after all he finally came to a halt next to his lover, looking at him strangely. Clark didn't react, just stared at something close to the ceiling.

Lex followed his gaze when he could feel that Clark sure as hell wouldn't answer his silent question.

And could feel his jaw drop.

This.

Was.

Not.

Possible.

Lex heard a mumbled, "I never thought it would start to show so soon."

Wide-eyed he turned to Clark, who seemed to realize in the same moment what he'd just said. With a startled gasp, horrified green eyes turned towards him.

"What did you just say, Clark?" Lex was proud that his voice sounded so calm. Collected.

"I ... ah ... I ... gotta go."

And just like before in the living room, Clark was gone in the blink of an eye. One second Lex had seen an absolutely terrified face, the next he stared into open space.

A little snuffling noise from Marian reminded him again why he was here in the first place. Very slowly, and very carefully, he climbed onto the bed, and reached out for the tiny infant. Slowly, without waking her up, he pulled her down from the ceiling, and put her back into bed. She sighed a little, and then she was quiet again.

Lex turned off the alarm which was inaudible in this room by hitting a switch behind a control panel in the wall. Then he left the room quietly. He had a lot to think about.

On his way downstairs, he pulled out his cell. He had a few calls to make, some things to arrange. While waiting for the person on the other end to pick up, a thought came to mind that made him involuntarily chuckle: he had heard about people sleepwalking. But never before had he heard about babies sleepfloating.

~*~

No one heard the car approaching. No one heard the slam of the door or saw the flickering of the lights when Lex hit the switch on his key that locked the car. However, he could hear the voices coming from inside of the house. Loud voices, which were unusual for this family. He contemplated for a second on whether to make himself noticeable when a shout from Martha stopped his hand in midair ... one heartbeat before he could knock.

"She did WHAT?"

"She floated. In the middle of the bedroom. Mom, did I ever do something like that?" Clark. Cool. Calm. With just a little hint of panic in his voice.

Lex moved a little bit closer so he could look inside the house. Martha just sat down with a heavy sigh, and buried her head in her hands. Jon rested one hand in a comforting gesture on her shoulder.

"We don't know, son. When you came to us, you were already older. Maybe it's normal for Kryptonian babies to float in their sleep. I don't know. I wish I could help you."

Kryptonian? What the .... Clark's loud voice interrupted his tumbling thoughts.

"Oh yeah? Do you?" the young man snapped. "If you'd had ANY say in this matter, Marian would have never been born. If I hadn't been so far along that an abortion simply wasn't possible anymore without me dying in the process ... she would never have existed."

Clark was acting irrationally. Hurt. Angry. Feelings Lex could only understand too well but he'd never thought he'd see them in his lover, although his brain was still having difficulties in acknowledging and accepting what he was hearing. Clark's father flinched and his son almost seemed to enjoy that. But Jonathan remained quiet. Probably because he knew that Clark was right.

"You didn't," Martha said after a little pause. "You didn't float in your bed. I would have noticed. Motion sensors or not. You never floated. Not unless you were older. Maybe it's because Marian was born on Earth. Maybe she developed her abilities sooner because she was under the influence of our sun from day one."

For a moment, Lex wondered when exactly he had left the real world and dropped in this twilight zone. Because what he was hearing couldn't possibly be true. Right?

A pregnant man.

A floating child.

A pregnant man.

So why didn't he freak out? He should run to his car, get in, slam the door behind him, and get the hell out of Dodge City.

He didn't.

A pregnant man. His lover pregnant with his child. He remembered their first discussion about protection. Lex himself was tested regularly. Clark had sworn that he was clean. Lex had believed him without a second thought. And somewhere during their discussion, Clark had said, "It's not as if I could get pregnant, right?"

Wrong.

So very wrong. Now he knew. Then he hadn't. He moved a little closer, trying to hear more of the conversation that was now going on in a more civilized manner, therefore much quieter.

"Honey, you do know that you might have to tell him eventually?" Martha. The voice of reason.

"Are you out of your mind?" Jonathan. Like always the voice of anti-Luthor-ism.

"DAD!"

"JON!"

In unison. Lex smiled slightly. He wondered who would win.

"I know, Mom. I just ... I don't know how. It's not as if I can walk into his office and say, 'Hi, Lex. Guess what ... your daughter is mine, too, because I'm an alien, and ... wow ... I never thought it could happen, but hey, I can get pregnant.'"

A little snort. Probably Martha. "No, you're right, honey. That would be a little ... awkward. Even for a Luthor."

Clark sighed. "Can't you just for once call him Lex? I mean ... he's the father of MY daughter. The father of your grandchild. Can't you please at least TRY to get over your resentment and call him by his name? For Marian's sake?"

Silence.

Another resigned sigh. "Okay. Look ... you don't have to love him the way I do. At least try and tolerate him."

The silence stretched.

Lex didn't know what he should think about everything he had just heard. When he'd come to Smallville all those years ago, he had thought he'd pretty much seen everything in his life. He'd been certain that there was nothing and no one that could surprise him anymore. That was before he met Clark Kent. And that was on his first day by driving his car over the bridge.

Hitting Clark Kent with his car at 60 mph.

After hearing what he'd just heard, he was now absolutely sure that he had hit Clark. After all, Clark could get pregnant, so why wouldn't he survive being run over by a car?

It explained so much. Suddenly he could understand his lover in a way he hadn't been able to do before. Suddenly all those little quirks made sense. His unexplainable disappearances, sometimes in the middle of the night. The way he sometimes cocked his head, as if listening to words only he could hear. The unmarred beauty of his skin even after a pretty rough night. Lex had never found a single bruise or hickey on the golden skin.

Lex had stopped asking him questions about the why and the how. He had stopped it shortly after he had made love to Clark for the first time. Asking questions always put a haunted expression on his lover's face, and Lex quickly learned that asking questions would sooner or later push Clark away.

And that was something Lex never even wanted to consider.

He leaned against the wall next to the door. His thoughts were running around in circles, like a hamster in a wheel. His instinct told him to burst in, grab Clark, shake him until he confessed everything to his face ... and then drag him home to their daughter and make love to him until he was pregnant with their second child.

His mind told him to think this whole thing over, and make the right decision. The wrong decision could mean he would lose Clark.

His heart told him to go inside, make himself known, talk with Clark's parents, and maybe ... just maybe ... be able to become a part of his lover's family.

His father would bang his head against the next available surface if he'd known about his son's thoughts, Lex thought with wry amusement.

Alternately, his own.

In the end, Clark made the decision for him. Before the older man could come up with a decision, he heard Clark's voice. "You can come in, Lex. I know you've been out there listening all along."

Lex started, and then heard the combined gasps of Clark's parents. Slowly, he pushed the door open and stepped into the brightly lit kitchen. Clark stood with his back to him, just like that afternoon. His parents were standing by his side, framing him as if they had to protect him. Protect him from the evil that was Lex Luthor. Right now Lex couldn't care less. He eyed Clark curiously. So much had changed in the last hour that he didn't know what to do now.

"You can keep her, you know?" Clark's voice interrupted his thoughts.

With a frown, Lex cocked his head. "What do you mean?"

Clark's shoulders slumped. "I know how much you always wanted to have a child, although not necessarily from a freak alien." His mother opened his mouth to object to the 'freak' but he silenced her with a single look. Then he continued. "Marian is your daughter. I won't make any claims. You can ... can forget about me."

"Clark, I ..."

The young man turned around, and for the first time since Lex had met him he was the reason for tears in those beautiful green eyes.

He felt like a complete bastard.

"No, Lex. It's all right. You had her blood tested. You know she *is* your daughter. I ... I'm sorry for messing up your life. Maybe you should go now."

Lex crossed his arms before his chest ... a clear sign that he was not going anywhere. Clark sighed in defeat, threw his hands up in the air in an 'I give up' gesture, and grumbled, "Fine. *I'll* go. I'll be out in the barn."

Lex had heard the expressions of 'stony silence' or 'deafening silence.' But never before had he experienced it.

He did now. Jonathan and Martha Kent were still standing at the table, staring at him in silent accusation.

Jonathan finally broke the silence. "You heard it all, huh?"

Lex nodded.

"What ... ahem ... what are you going to do now?" he asked.

"What do you mean?" Lex asked again.

"Will you ... I mean ... is he still ... God, Martha, I can't do that." Jonathan sighed deeply, and dropped down on the nearby couch.

Martha gestured to a chair, and Lex sat down. She poured herself a cup of coffee, and put one in front of him, too. He tried the coffee, and was surprised to find that it was made exactly the way he liked it. He raised his head, and Martha smiled. "Clark told us how you like your coffee."

"About every damn time he makes himself a cup," Jon growled slightly from the couch. Martha laughed softly, and even Lex couldn't quite suppress a smile. But then she became serious again, and Lex knew that the tiny truce he had achieved was over.

"What Jonathan wanted to know is: what are you going to do with your knowledge? Will you lock Clark up into one of your labs? Will you dissect him or try to find out how his powers work? Or will he be safe with you? Will you protect him?"

Lex could feel himself grow pale at the thought of his lover lying on a steel metal table, being cut open by scientists in white lab coats with their faces hidden behind white masks. The mere thought made him nauseous, and he was glad that he was already sitting.

Martha watched him very closely, gauging his reaction. Apparently, she liked what she saw. "He was afraid, Lex," she said after a little pause. "He was afraid that exactly that might happen the moment he tells you what he is. He loves you but he was never one hundred percent sure that you'd love him back the same way."

"I do," Lex murmured, shocked that Clark doubted his feelings so much. Angry that the man who had shared his bed and house for almost a year still hadn't trusted him enough to talk to him about something so ... so big. Something so extraordinary. But he couldn't get *really* furious. Deep down inside he even understood Clark a little bit. Understood that with the upbringing Clark had, trusting another person with his heritage wasn't something that came easy. He sat staring into his coffee, trying to get his thoughts back into some resemblance of order, tried to sort out his feelings. Then he suddenly had to chuckle lightly. Apparently, having a baby had made him mellow. A year ago, he wouldn't have hesitated to run out into the barn and rip his lover a new one for not telling him. Or he would have gotten into his car, and driven off, back to his castle to sulk about his lover not trusting him.

Now he sat there in the Kent's kitchen, drinking coffee, trying to sort through his and his lover's feelings. Suddenly, he put his hands on the table, causing Martha to jump slightly. Then he got up, nodded to Jonathan and Martha, and said, "Mr. Kent, Mrs. Kent ... excuse me while I kill your son."

Jonathan jumped up, ready to get his shotgun out, but Martha stopped him with a hand on his arm and a smile.

"He's out in the barn. Don't startle him. He's been a little jumpy ever since his pregnancy."

Jonathan groaned and sank down on the couch again. Lex was stunned for this was the first time that anyone admitted it to his face that Clark indeed had been the one giving birth to Marian. He gave in to one of his rare impulses and hugged Martha.

Then he ran out before he did something really stupid.

Like hugging Jonathan.

~*~

The barn was dark and quiet. Clark needed the feeling of safety that the darkness gave him. He sat on his worn-out old sofa, his knees pulled up with his arms draped around them, staring out into the darkness. He expected to hear his father's shotgun every second or a yelling match from the house. The slamming of doors, the howling of a sport's car ... everything that would tell him that Lex was disappearing from his life again.

What he didn't expect though was the soft footfall of a man approaching the barn. A painfully familiar footfall.

He listened more closely. The door opened and closed, and Lex came upstairs. "Clark?" Lex's voice sounded hesitant.

Clark remained quiet. He really so didn't need that right now. Didn't need Lex's scientific curiosity. Didn't need the catalogue of questions that was most likely to follow.

But Lex surprised him. He came up the last flight of stairs. Without saying a word, he walked over to where Clark was sitting and sat down next to him.

The silence lasted a long time. It was Clark who spoke the first words in a hoarse voice. "I didn't know it, Lex. Please, you have to believe me."

"I do."

Clark sighed, and rested his chin on his knees. He didn't know what his lover (his FORMER lover?) wanted to hear from him now.

"Why haven't you told me, Clark?" Lex asked gently. "Why didn't you tell me the moment you found out?"

Clark shivered slightly at the murmured question. It wasn't in the least what he'd expected. He had expected accusations. Followed by questions about what he could do. About his abilities. Maybe even an appointment with a scientist in one of Lex's lab.

He certainly hadn't expected this. "I was scared shitless," he murmured, wincing when he noticed the glitch in his language. His mom would most certainly scold him if she'd heard it.

But it was true. He'd *been* scared shitless. It wasn't everyday that you find out you're male, gay AND pregnant.

"You could have come to me, love."

Clark didn't know how to respond, so he stuck to saying nothing.

Lex continued after a while, and this time his voice sounded far less confident. "That is ... I mean ... maybe your feelings have changed. Then I could understand it. If you don't ... "

He wasn't able to finish the sentence for Clark had more or less jumped him and was busy kissing the living daylights out of Lex. It seemed to suit the older man just fine, for he didn't really put up that much of a fight. Then, as sudden as he had initiated the kisses, Clark moved back again, bowing his head, glancing down at his hands.

"I love you, Lex ... love you so much. Don't you ... don't you hate me? Now that you know what I am?"

Clark felt a strong hand in his neck, turning his face up and around a little so he had to look Lex in the eye. "What you are, love, is one of the most amazing people I've ever met. You've not only given me your love but also managed something so extraordinary that though I have the living, breathing proof at home I still have difficulty wrapping my mind around it. I also know that this sounds so sappy and corny that later I will deny categorically that I ever said something like that. Understood?"

Clark nodded, feeling giddy and almost drunken with happiness.

Lex pulled him over for another deep kiss. "Then now I'd suggest we go home to our daughter. Mercy is looking after her right now. And though I trust her with *my* life ... I'm not so sure about how she's with babies. And no, Clark ... you don't have to look so panicked. Marian is fine."

Clark was already halfway down the stairs before Lex could blink. "CLARK! Wait for me."

~*~

The drive to the house was silent. After Clark had given his parents a short overview about their talk in the barn, he had thrown a few things into his overnight bag, and had kissed his parents good-bye.

He smiled when he remembered that Lex had held his hand on the way from the barn back to the house, and then on the way to the car. Now Lex's right hand rested casually on the gearshift, and Clark's hand was on top of it, caressing it gently with his thumb.

Still silent, they parked the car and walked into the house. Mercy was dismissed with a nod from Lex, and together they made their way upstairs to Lex's bedroom.

Marian was sleeping peacefully. Lex was gazing down at her. For the first time he was really looking at her. Intensely. The dark, almost black hair. So dark and silken like his lover's.

How could he have been so blind? 'Because this was something you don't automatically look for,' his inner voice whispered. He silenced it immediately.

"She looks so much like you," he whispered, leaning closer to Clark. "She's so beautiful."

Clark turned to him, and smiled. They left the room as quietly as they had entered it.

"What now?"

Lex had expected that question and, in fact, had asked himself the same one for the last few hours. What now?

Marian was a miracle. Nothing more and nothing less. "To be honest ... I don't know what now."

He poured himself a drink, thought for a moment, and poured a second one for his lover. Handing him the scotch, he sat down next to Clark, who'd made himself comfortable on the couch in front of the fireplace.

"What do you want, Clark?" he finally asked.

"You." The answer came without hesitation. "Our child. A life with both of you in it." And then a little quieter, "Your love."

"I would like that, too."

Clark raised his head, hope in his eyes but Lex kept his expression serious. There was something important that he needed to tell his young lover, and Lex knew that it could hurt Clark immensely.

"You have to understand that you can never officially be the father of your own child. You can never stand up for her, telling the world who she really is."

Clark bowed his head again. "I know," he murmured. "But it's better than to give her up completely."

Lex chose his next words very carefully. "Though...you can always adopt her, you know? That way you would be as much her legal father as I am. And we can do the same with our next child."

This time Clark's head shot up so fast that for a moment Lex was afraid his lover might have strained something. "You ... you ... want ..."

Lex waited slightly amused if his lover would be able to finish the sentence. When that didn't happen, he did it for him. "More children with you?"

Clark nodded.

Lex leaned closer, and gave his lover a gentle kiss on the mouth. "As many as you want to give me, love."

The kiss became more passionate when Clark began to reciprocate. After a while, Lex moved back a little, and smiled. "Want to start tonight?"

Clark's beaming smile was the only answer he needed.

End