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Special Roshanah Day—
Nena sat and kicked the legs of her chair. She’d been revved up all day. She tried to explain to her teacher, Mr. Gutierrez, what roshana was but she’d gotten it all mixed up.
She could tell that it was a Special Day when Daddy picked her up. Most of the time, Daddy Charlie or Grandpa Alan picked her up and Daddy got home from work later. Mr. Gutierrez thought it was funny that her ‘OK to pick up’ list had six men and two women, only one who had the same last name as Nena. She had tried to explain who everybody was but Mr. Gutierrez had gotten that confused look on his face that most grown-ups did when Nena tried to explain her family.
Nena jumped up from her chair as Daddy walked into the school, but Mr. Gutierrez got to him first. He pulled Daddy aside and started talking about school stuff. She heard the words ‘advanced’ and ‘accelerated.’ Nena fidgeted for a few minutes then started dragging at Daddy’s hand.
“Sorry,” Daddy said to her teacher. “Rosh Hashanah starts tonight and she’s a little excited.”
“I didn’t realize you were Jewish,” Mr. Gutierrez said.
“We’re not,” Daddy said, “But my boyfriend’s family is.”
Mr. Gutierrez’s eyes widened, and he just said, “Oh.”
“Gotta go,” Daddy said, his voice a little funny.
Nena waved and they went out to Daddy’s car.
Daddy didn’t head straight home, but instead said to her, “Today’s a special day and you’re too big for your purple dress now. How about we go get a pretty new dress?”
“Okay!” Nena said, bouncing in her seat. When she went clothes shopping with Grandpa Alan, he was the one who picked out what she tried on. But Daddy let Nena pick out whatever she wanted to try on, and rarely said no on anything. Nena was careful not to pick out too many things, because she knew Mommy took most of Daddy’s money.
“On to the mall, then!” Daddy said and pulled out of the school parking lot.
When they got home a while later – they’d ended up shopping for shoes and more school clothes – Daddy said, “Go upstairs and get changed into your new dress, okay?”
Nena dropped her school stuff on the table and hurried upstairs. The dress was hard to put on, but she’d assured Daddy that she could manage the new dress all by herself. She twisted around and got the zipper most of the way up. She twirled in front of the mirror, delighted. The pink skirt part poofed out as she spun. She put some chapstick on her lips and smacked them, like she’d seen Mommy do with her lipstick.
When Nena started down the stairs, the rest of the family was already there. Uncle Don and Uncle Will were helping to set the table and were laughing about something. Daddy was wiping chalk dust from Charlie’s jacket while Charlie told him about something, waving his hands as he talked, until Daddy had to hold on to his arm to get him to stop moving.
It was only the second time they’d all been together since the day after The Yelling. The pretend-happy that always followed the yelling with Mommy was much worse than this had been. This time didn’t have any bad looks behind others’ backs, there weren’t any too-big smiles or fake laughs. This pretend-happy almost felt like before the yelling, like happy-happy. Sometimes she even forgot it was pretend-happy time.
Tonight, especially, it was hard to remember that. Everyone was smiling and dressed in their best clothes, which meant suits for everybody but her. Even Will was wearing a suit, which she’d never seen before. She didn’t really like it when Daddy wore a suit, because that meant he was going to work, but he did look good in it. So did everybody else, though Charlie’s suit was different colors on top and bottom and not as fancy as the rest.
The table was set with a new white tablecloth and all of Grandpa’s fanciest dishes, the ones that she’d only ever seen in the cabinet. She loved the tiny flowers and gold lace on the edges of the plates and bowls. There was something else, covered by a special-looking piece of cloth, and a clear glass bowl with maybe honey. As she watched, Grandpa Alan came out from the kitchen with a red plate full of sliced apples.
“Come sit!” Alan announced, checking his watch.
Nena came the rest of the way down the stairs and everyone smiled and said how good she looked. Daddy called her over and pulled her zipper the rest of the way up. He smoothed down her hair and smiled at her.
Don took out his camera but Alan shook his head. “No time, Charlie calculated the time and we need to start now.”
Nodding, Don put the camera away and went towards the table. He and Will sat on one side of the table and Charlie sat at an end. Daddy sat on the other side.
Nena moved to sit down between Daddy and Charlie but Alan put his hand on her shoulder. “Nena, I have a special thing to ask you to do, because you’re the lady of the house.”
Nena beamed and stood up straighter.
“If you could, please light these two candles, then you and I will say a little prayer together.”
Alan gave her a long match to hold and he lit the end of it with a lighter. She carefully lit two tall white candles on the pretty silver and brown candlesticks.
“Wave your hand like this,” Alan said, demonstrating. “Like you’re bringing the light towards your face.”
Nena did, smelling the hot wax and burning fire.
“Now, cover your eyes with your hands, and repeat after me. This is a little long, but hang in there, okay?”
Nena closed her eyes and nodded.
Alan spoke, and Nena attempted to repeat his words, “Bless’d you Lod, ‘re God rulerr of world, who sangktified us through His ‘mmandments and ‘manded us to keendle lights of holy day. Bless’d ‘re you Lod, God ruler of world, Whoz kept us ‘live, ‘stained us, and ‘nabled us to reach seasun.”
She opened her eyes and Alan was giving her a big smile. “Excellent, honey.” He took the candles and set one on each end of the table.
Alan addressed the group. “Whew, just on time! Now we can wish each other Shana Tova. It means ‘a Good Year,’ like wishing you ‘Happy New Year.’”
“Shana Tova,” all the adults responded.
Nena sat in the chair next to Daddy and pulled on his shirt. “Daddy, doesa mean there’ll be firewurks and we c’n stay up late?”
“No, honey,” Daddy smiled. “That’s the American new year. The Jewish new year starts on a different day. Like how we each have different birthdays, right?”
“Oh! It’s the Jewush year’s birfday!”
“Yep,” Daddy grinned. “But instead of saying ‘Happy Birthday’, we say ‘Good Year’ or Shana Tova.”
“Shhaynaytoevay,” Nena said carefully.
“Good job!” Charlie said. “Good job with the prayer, too.”
“’m hungry,” Nena said, looking at the slices of apple on the nearby plate.
“Me, too, sweetie,” Daddy said. “But we need to be patient and not eat until Grandpa Alan tells us when we can eat each thing, okay? This is part of what makes the meal special.”
Nena sighed and ran her finger over the flowers on her plate.
Alan, now sitting at the head of the table, was consulting a piece of paper. After a moment, he nodded and held up a cup Nena had never seen before. “Now I’m going to say kiddish, then we’ll pass around the cup and each take a sip. It’s grape juice.” Alan continued talking, saying more big words in a funny, fancy way, but Nena was more interested in the cup he was holding. It had pretty pictures on it, like a storybook. There was a little plate next to Alan’s place that matched the cup and Nena wondered what that was for.
Nena realized that Alan was done when Charlie and Don said, “Amen,” followed by Daddy and Will saying it. Then, after everyone looked at her, she said it, too.
Alan passed the big cup to Daddy who took a sip and handed it to Nena. He made sure she had a good grip on the heavy cup before letting it go. Nena took a careful sip and passed it onto Charlie. Don and Will took their drink and the cup returned to Alan.
“Okay, now we all need to wash our hands.”
“I washed ‘fore!” Nena insisted.
Alan smiled at her. “Me, too. This is just part of this special meal.”
Nena sighed and got up from the table. She took her turn washing her hands, just barely remembering in time to use a towel to dry her hands instead of her new dress, and returned to her seat. She fiddled with her fork and waited for everyone else to sit down.
When everyone was back, Alan pulled the pretty piece of cloth up to reveal two round loaves of bread. It looked wonderful and Nena leaned forward.
“Don and Charlie will recognize challah,” Alan said. “Even if not this shape. Challah is usually straight, like a normal loaf of bread, but on Rosh Hashanah it’s round, like a perfect circle, like we want the year to be, a circle that rolls smoothly with no sorrow.”
Alan seemed to say the last words extra strong and everyone else nodded. Alan then sliced the bread and everyone took one piece but just held it. It smelled really good and Nena had a hard time not taking a bite yet. They passed around the clear bowl – it did have honey in it and a dipper. Everyone drizzled honey on their bread with the dipper, passed it on, then waited some more. Without thinking, Nena licked off a drop of honey that had fallen on her fingers, then hoped no one noticed.
After everyone had their bread, Alan said, “Blessed are You, Eternal our God, Ruler of the Universe, who brings forth bread from the earth,” then ate his bread.
Nena quickly bit into hers, it was delicious!
Apples came next, passed around on the red apple plate. The honey dish followed, like the bread. Alan said, “Blessed are you Lord, our God, Ruler of the world, Creator of the fruit of the tree.” He took a bite of his apple then said, “May it be Your will that You renew for us a good and sweet year.”
The bread had only woken up her stomach, so Nena wolfed down her apple slice and licked her fingers.
“You might want to eat a little slower,” Will laughed.
Nena nodded, sad that she hadn’t eaten slow because she now had nothing more to eat, and picked up her napkin. She pulled the white napkin out of the ring and laid it on her lap, like at a fancy restaurant. She studied the brightly-colored napkin ring while Alan brought out more plates. The napkin ring was blue and lots of colors with animals and plants.
Looking up, Nena saw a wide variety of dishes – nothing that looked familiar. Some things smelled and looked good, but others looked really weird. She eyed the food uncertainly.
Charlie said quietly, “Just put a small amount of everything on your plate when it goes by. After each prayer, you don’t have to take a big bite, if you don’t want to. Just take the little bite or lick and then you can get more of what you like later.”
Alan picked up the first serving plate. “Orange slices, coated with almonds and dates,” he said and passed it to Daddy. Nena eagerly took one of the slices and put it on her plate.
Alan said, “May those who want to destroy us be consumed. May You cause a sense of wonder in the eyes of enemies and making them acknowledge Your greatness as Sovereign of the World,” then he took a bite of his orange.
Nena’s slice was really good and she looked forward to the next plate.
“Beet salad with leeks, sour cream, and spices,” Alan said and passed a bowl towards her. This one looked a lot less good, but she put a spoonful on her plate.
“May our enemies be removed. May our misdeeds, our spiritual enemies, be cut down,” Alan said.
Following Alan’s lead, Nena took a cautious nibble of the salad. She didn’t like the beets, but the dressing was good.
Next was ‘pumpkin pancakes’ and ‘May You tear up our negative judgments and may You read our good merits before You.’ Nena ate a big bite of the funny pancake. It tasted like cinnamon and pumpkin pie.
Then ‘chicken in pomegranate sauce’ and ‘May it be Your will that our merits be numerous as the seeds of the pomegranate.’ She really liked that and ate her whole little serving.
Finally, ‘wild rice pilaf wrapped in grape leaves’ and ‘May we hope for a full year filled with blessings and prosperity.’ This one looked really suspicious, but when she opened the green leaf wrapper, the rice inside was a kind that Alan served a lot.
Then it looked like the slow part of the meal was done and everyone dug into the meal with relief. Nena grinned and got more oranges and bread and chicken.
Dinner was wonderful, not just because of the food, but because everyone was talking to everyone else, no one had frowns on their faces, and Alan looked really pleased. Will fed Don an apple covered with honey then gave him a smacking kiss. Don blushed and everyone else laughed. Charlie then promptly picked up an apple slice and did the same with Daddy. They kissed until Alan started complaining.
When the meal was almost over, just when Nena thought she’d burst if she ate any more, Alan brought out a cake. He said it was, “a honey cake with raisins, a little coffee, and lemon glaze.” Nena found out that she had some space in her tummy after all. After everyone was done eating, they each dipped their fingers in a bowl of water. Then Alan said fancy words about God and goodness and never going without food and Nena pushed a raisin around on her plate, getting sleepy with her full stomach.
After dinner, they watched a movie together until Nena fell asleep on Don’s lap and was carried upstairs.
The next morning, Grandpa Alan made regular pancakes for breakfast, then Uncle Don and Uncle Will came over. Everyone dressed up in nice clothes again, Nena wearing an old dress that just barely fit after last night’s big meal. They went to a beautiful building with lots of things for Nena to look at, from people wearing funny hats to glass picture windows. She got a crick in her neck from staring up at the fancy ceiling.
She didn’t understand most of the church-meeting stuff, but there were some pretty songs and she liked the special roshanah horn and the faces the man made when he blew it. After the church-meeting, they went back home and had leftovers from last night plus fresh bread.
After lunch, they all put bread crumbs in their pockets and walked down to the park. Nena held Charlie’s hand on one side and Dadddy’s on the other and every few steps they would lift her up and she would swing. She wished every day could be like this, though school was fun, too. Everyone was smiling and talking to each other. Alan and Will were in front and talking serious, but not bad-serious, and they were using words that Nena had heard at the church-meeting earlier. `
When they got to the park, they went to the stream and threw their bread crumbs into the water and watched them wash away. Nena crouched down and looked for Mr. Frogtree while Alan talked about some people that she didn’t know. But she did understand the part about God not staying mad at someone forever, so they shouldn’t either, and where Alan said that they were throwing away the bad things that they did and felt last year with the crumbs. Nena stood up and made sure that every little crumb was gone from her pockets. Then she inspected the pockets of everyone else to make sure all the bad things had gone into the water and gotten washed away.
Daddy pushed her on a swing while Don and Charlie leaned on the monkey bars and laughed really hard about something. Alan sat on a swing next to Nena and exchanged more church-meeting words with Will. Both of them had that light in their eyes that people got when they were really interested in something, like when Charlie was doing math or Daddy was looking at Charlie.
Nena took the day and hugged it tight, then she filled up her pockets with rocks. She wanted this day to be with her all year.