Work Text:
Betrayed
by Anne Marsh
"You know, she said she loved me."
Sayid just looked at him and waited for him to elaborate.
"Kate. I mean, I guess I asked her if she did, but you know, she didn't have to say sure 'nuff and yes I do if she didn't. She coulda said no, not like I was gonna cry or nothing, but no, she goes and says she loves me and now, now she's watching Jack like ain't no other man so much as exists."
Sayid shrugged.
"You know, you could be a participant in this conversation."
"What would you like me to say?"
"I don't know!"
There was a long pause, and finally, with an air of sage and infinite wisdom, Sayid said "Women."
"Women." Sawyer snorted.
"Can't live with them, can't string them up by their ankles and use them as polar bear bait. Well, you could, but it's not the done thing."
"An' I don't exactly trust Jack so much now. Not even 'cause of Kate. I could care less-- wait, no, I *couldn't* care less, she don't want me, screw her. But Juliet?"
"I don't like it either. We've been over that."
"I'm just sayin'."
"Yes. I noticed."
"I'm not even jealous anymore, I'm just pissed. Pissed at all three of 'em."
"Yes."
"You know?"
"I said 'yes', didn't I?"
"You sure we couldn't leave Juliet out for the polar bears?"
"Pretty sure. At least not yet."
"I'm over her, I mean." Sawyer shrugged, not at all like Sayid's casual shrug, it was a sharp, twitchy movement.
"Then why are you still talking about her?" And for the first time, the Iraqi betrayed some irritation.
"Because! She sold us out! And she-- she betrayed *me*! And don't give me that look, okay? I know I probably had it comin', but not now... not with this. *Juliet*." He spat. "That just makes me sick."
"Sawyer." Sayid's voice was strained. "Please. You're being difficult even for you. I'm trying to concentrate on something."
"What's got into you, Ahab?"
He blinked. "I believe I still have both legs."
"No, not the whale guy, the-- Oh, you don't know! Nevermind, fine. I'm just displayin' concern."
"Concern?"
"Well I asked what was wrong with you, didn't I?"
"Nothing is 'wrong' with me. I'm perfectly fine. But I am busy, and you can't stop talking about your... fickle woman issues."
"Fine." Sawyer stood, dusting off his jeans to absolutely no avail and stalking off, leaving the secluded edge of the jungle and heading down the beach. He tried muttering angrily to himself about the whole messy business, but it wasn't nearly as satisfying, and after a while, he noticed Hurley was staring at him. "What?"
"Nothing."
"Well then why the starin', Gigantor?"
"Dude, for starters-- actually, I like 'Gigantor' a lot more than 'Lardo', you can keep using that one if you want to. I was just thinking how I used to know a guy who talked to himself like that."
"Oh yeah?"
"Yeah, but he was, like, in an institution."
"Okay, we're done talking now."
"What's the matter?"
"Nothin's the matter."
"Then why are you talking to yourself? 'Cause that's a pretty clear indication of things being the matter, is all."
"Oh, what would you know about it?"
Sawyer paced. A lot. Sawyer got mad-- madder, at Kate and Jack and that Juliet woman, and a little mad at pretty much everyone else. Finally, he stormed back up the beach and over to the little hollow where Sayid was 'busy'.
"Okay," He railed. "If you don't want to talk about what's the matter, then it ain't none of my business, but I know for damn sure my talkin' ain't enough to bother you, 'cause you work through that all the time."
Sayid looked up at him coolly. "All right."
"All right? What, that's it? We're not... gonna argue about it?"
"Why bother?"
"Well, 'cause I got myself all worked up and if this damn jungle had a door, I'da slammed it! You're just gonna have me waste my indignation?"
"I thought I might."
Sawyer snorted, folded himseld into a seated position on the rainforest floor. "All right, fine. Be that way. So... whatcha doing?"
"At the moment? Nothing."
"You bastard."
"Any particular reason you came back, or was it just to fight with me?"
"Well-- What-- Oh, who cares? I just felt like coming back. I have as much right to be here as you, don't I? No reason I should have to go off just 'cause you got-- Why?"
Sayid shrugged and went back to studiously doing nothing with some little electrical thing.
Sawyer watched him. He wasn't angry, exactly. At least not at Sayid, not anymore. He was definitely angry with Kate, and Jack, but he wasn't... jealous, really. Just mad. Betrayed. Betrayed by Jack who trusted Juliet, and by Kate who didn't trust Juliet but still trusted Jack, which was even more insane.
"Why talk to me?" Sayid asked softly.
Sawyer snapped up to attention, hadn't expected Sayid to speak. "Whaddya mean? Gotta talk to somebody. Least you an' me are on the same side."
"Yes, but... how did that happen? When you didn't trust Jack, you came to me. I wondered... why you trusted me."
"Is there any reason I shouldn't?" He raised an eyebrow.
"It isn't that. But... if *you* didn't trust me, I would understand it."
"Aw... just-- forget about that, will ya? You ain't exactly the only person around here to have tortured me. Besides... if I hadn't jerked you around, you wouldn't have." A slight question danced around his eyes.
"No. I wouldn't have." Sayid's held them levelly in answer.
"Sure, our history's got its... unpleasantness. But I know you're the one person on this island'll do anything to protect this camp and the people in it. I thought I knew that about Jack, too, but I don't anymore."
"Thank you." Sayid stood and moved to the edge of the jungle.
"Hey! Where you going?"
He shrugged.
Sawyer sighed and leaned back against the nearest tree.
"I ain't never gonna understand you," He called out. There was no answer, and when he continued, it was mostly to himself. "Gettin' all pissy and then saying you won't fight with me, and I don't even know what's up with that quiet act... If I didn't know any better, boy, I-- "
And then he realized that he didn't.
FIN