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May sighed, as she walked into her room. She sat down on her bed, and tears overtook her. She and Salene
had had another fight. That's all the two of them had been doing recently, was fighting, and May was getting
tired of it. She loved Salene more than life itself, but there was only so much a person could take, and Salene
was surely making things hard right now. May sighed, and she pulled her covers over her body, up to her neck,
trying to block out the cold feeling she was having right now. Things were going from good to bad, from bad to
worse, and didn't look like things were going to be slowing down, anytime soon.
They had been arguing about their relationship, or lack thereof. Things were only getting worse. May
didn't really know how Salene felt. They had shared a few stolen kisses, and held hands a few times,
but other than that, nothing out of the ordinary happened between the two friends, and May wanted
more. She really loved Salene, with all of her heart, and she wanted the other woman to feel the same,
but May couldn't force Salene to like her as more than a friend. And it killed her, that she couldn't make
Salene feel the same way, that she was feeling.
Salene sat on the floor in her room. She was so confused about everything. New feelings were
racing through her, and she didn't know how to handle them. Most of what Salene was feeling,
confused her, which only added to how stressed out she was, which wasn't helping matters any.
Salene sighed, and she ran a shaky hand through her hair, and wondered when she had turned
gay. She laughed softly, knowing what May would think, if she could hear her thoughts at this
very minute.
"You can't turn gay. You either are, or you aren't," Salene said, in a mocking manner. She rolled her eyes,
and lie down on the floor in her room, not knowing what to do about her situation with May. "Should I tell
her I'm not interested? But wait... That's not completely true. I mean, I am interested, a little. At least, I
think so." Salene said softly. There was so much going on in her mind right now she didn't want to think
about all of the problems she was having, dealing with May, and everything else that was going on right
now.
May threw the covers off herself, and she got up from her bed, walking over to the door, throwing
it open, and then leaving her room, as she walked down the hall, going to Salene's room. Not even
bothering to knock, she walks into Salene's room. Seeing the other woman lying down on the floor,
May took a seat next to her. "I love you Salene, but I can't live my life like this, not ever knowing
if you love me back, or if I'm a roll in the hay, since you can't be with Ryan, because of the fact
that he was taken by the Techno's."
"I have cried for you. I have drank my way into a drunken stupor, just to try and forget about
my love for you, since you will only accept friendship from me, but I won't do it anymore. You
either love me as a lover, or you don't exist to me anymore. I can't live my life waiting for you
to wake up, and understand that I love you, and that I don't plan on leaving you. I just don't
have it in me to wait. It could take forever for you to believe me, Salene, and I just don't have
forever," May said softly. It hurt her to say this to Salene, but she had to.
Salene stared at May, as the other woman spoke, revealing her true feelings. They had been"dating"
for a while now. Salene estimated about 4 months, and now, here was May, saying she couldn't take
things as they were, that their arrangement, just wasn't working for her, and that scared Salene. She
didn't want to lose their friendship, but Salene wasn't sure that she was ready to come out and say,
"I'm a lesbian, and I'm ready to go out and date girls." Salene just wasn't like that. She was a private
person.
"Look May, I need you to understand-" "No Salene, you are the one who needs to understand! I can't
keep playing this game with you anymore. One minute you are hot, and it seems like you like me. Then,
the next moment, you turn cold, and I begin to even wonder if we are friends, much less lovers. What
do you want me to do? I can't keep living like this! It's driving me crazy!" May said, and then she got
up a moment later, and began pacing the room in anger.
"I don't know what's real and what's not, anymore. I can't separate fiction from reality,
all because I have gotten myself helplessly hooked on you! I don't want to be yanked
around anymore Salene, and you need to respect me enough to tell me. Do you want
to be with me, or not?" Salene sighed, and as she opened up her mouth to speak, May
cuts her off. "May I-" "No Salene, you listen. When I'm around you, I feel like I'm falling
forever. I'm drowning in you, in thoughts and images of you. But yet you don't love me."
Salene tried to speak, only to have May cut her off once more. "May I, I need-" "Go on, just
go on and scream at me, Salene. You know you want to. Scream all you want to. I can't hear
you, because no matter how close we are, I'm so far away. You can try and hurt me, try and
break me, but I won't be broken again. You're holding me back, but I won't let you anymore.
I have got to breathe; I can't keep going under... just to satisfy you, and wait for you."
The End.