Work Text:
As I Watch Him Sleep
by Mr. Denny Crane's Ghostwriter
As I watch him sleep, I know the time will come when I will have to take care of him. Because in spite of everyone who knows his name, they won't be there. They never are, not even now. Those he "goes way back with" aren't there. Those who claim to be his "friend" when they need the best lawyer in Boston aren't there. At the end of the day, when our whirlwind lives have calmed and night has settled in, I'm the only one there.
As I watch him sleep, I know I will probably never get what feels in my gut to be the only thing that matters anymore. I have to resist the overwhelming urge to crawl back into bed and wrap my arms around him. I have to resist the overwhelming urge to whisper that I will never leave him, that I will never abandon him, that I will never stop loving him. I have to resist the overwhelming urge to shed tears over the depth and purity of that love, however strange it may be.
As I watch him sleep, I feel he might slowly be accepting what we are. He might actually enjoy the fact that I flirt with him. He might actually enjoy the fact that I pursue him. He might actually enjoy that sometimes when we wake in the morning, we're in each other's arms. He might actually enjoy that I live here with him, that I share his bed...if not his body. And I know he enjoys that I care. If only he knew how much.
As I watch him sleep, I find I can't pull away from the irresistible invisible tether that draws me to his side. As I crawl under the covers, I continue to watch. As I lay my head on the pillow, body turned toward him, I continue to watch. His eyes are closed, his jaw hanging open slightly. He is so at peace. So serene. Shades of the younger Denny Crane peek out in this moment where he isn't wearing the mask. In an inexplicable way, here and now, he is beautiful.
As I watch him sleep, I hear him grunt softly. As I watch, his eyelids flutter open. As I watch, hazel eyes regard me for long, silent seconds. As I watch, he actually smiles and I smile back. "Do you like watching me sleep?" I just close my eyes. You have no idea, Denny. I'm always watching. Always. Minutes later I open my eyes to find him once again drifted away. And I watch him sleep.