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With a twist of reality on the side

Summary:

Jealous Demons. Time travel. Inter dimensional travel. Mix-ups and boo-boos. Xander makes a wish

Notes:

(See the end of the work for notes.)

Work Text:

Title: With a twist of reality on the side...

Author: Scorpio

Fandom: BtVS

Pairing: multiple

Disclaimer: Joss... not me.

Summary: Jealous Demons. Time travel. Inter dimensional travel. Mix-ups and boo-boos. Xander makes a wish...

 

With A Twist Of Reality On The Side...
by Scorpio
October 2000

 

Malcom stood in the deep shadows of the small apartment bedroom and scowled at the couple sleeping peacefully. His beloved, his eternal delight, his other half... was *mortal*. How he longed to just appear before his beautiful Anya and grant her greatest wish. To become a demon again.

Unfortunately, he couldn't.

He *was* a Vengeance Demon, her counterpoint, in fact. Where Anya had been the Patron Saint of Scorned Women, Malcom was the Patron Saint of Wronged Men. He could grant any wish under the sun or moon... as long as it was asked by a male.

However, he wasn't going to let that stop him. He wanted his beloved back and he had a plan on how to do that.

The mortal, Alexander Harris, was a key element of that plan.

The young man liked his Anya a lot, even if he didn't truly love her. He had taken her in hand and offered her friendship and protection, at first out of a sense of guilt, but then later, because he really had grown to care for her. In return, she helped him guard a secret he shouldn't ever have been made to carry.

Yes, Malcom knew what he had to do. First he would go into the past. Find the younger version of this Xander and then find a way to grant him *his* greatest wish. The world would then change enough that Anya would *never* feel the need to come to Sunnydale and help out Cordelia Chase. Thus, she'd never become mortal and be forced to leave his side.

Grinning wickedly, Malcom vanished without a sound.

*******

May 1996

Moving slowly so as not to awaken his father, *or* to jar his new assortment of bruises, Xander tip-toed across his bedroom and over to the window. He had long since removed the screen and oiled the tracks. With the lightest of tugs, the window slid up enough for him to crawl out and onto the slight slope of the porch roof. Walking slowly and carefully over to the other end, Xander gave a small leap and grabbed onto the overhanging tree branch. Making his way along it with a few often practiced hand-beyond-hand reach-and-grab moves, Xander soon found himself in the old maple tree. A shimmy and a slide, then his feet were on the ground. He dashed quickly over to the overgrown bush at the end of his property and darted around to the back.

There they stood. His oldest friend in the world, Jesse. And his newest friend in the world, Malcom.

Moving silently and staying to the shadows, the three young boys ran off into the night towards the thin strip of woods at the far border of the neighborhood. They had a tree house there. A secret place that, until tonight, only he and Jesse had known about. Tonight, they were bringing in Malcom. A boy who had just as shitty a life as they did.

The fastest route had been long since memorized and it only took them about fifteen minutes to get to their tree and then up inside the rickety wooden shack suspended in it's thick limbs.

Once inside, Jesse pulled out his cigarettes and his bic lighter. He lit the two scented candles they kept in the tree house for their middle of the night rendezvous and then he lit three of his smokes and then passed one each to Xander and Malcom. His sweet face softly glowing from the dim flickering light of the candles, Jesse turned to face Xander and raised up one eyebrow in a silent question.

With a mischievous grin and a noticeable wince of pain, Xander reached behind him and pulled a small, flatish bottle out that had been neatly tucked in the back waistband of his jeans. Holding it up for inspection by the other boys, Xander jiggled the unopened bottle of Jim Beam that he had filched from the old man's liquor cabinet.

Breaking open the seal, Xander removed the cap, took a swallow of the fiery liquid and then gasped for breath. The other two giggled at the expression of choking horror on his face and then Jesse grabbed the bottle and took a swallow for himself. He also nearly gagged at the strong whiskey as it burned a line down his tender throat. He then passed it to Malcom who took it but didn't drink.

"Do you two do this *every* Friday night when you meet here? I mean the smoking and the drinking."

Xander offered up a slight giggle.

"Well, *Jesse* smokes *all* the time as you know... *I* only smoke when I'm drinking. And yeah... every Friday we meet here and drink it up. Have been for the past two years now. Ever since Jesse turned twelve."

Jesse nodded his head in agreement and took a quick drag off of his cigarette before making a 'drink up' gesture. Malcom did take a swallow, a *small* swallow, and he also gasped for breath at the hard taste. With a laugh, Xander snagged the bottle from his new friend's hand before he could drop it.

"Don't worry. After the first sip or two, it starts to go down a lot easier. Honest."

As if to prove his point, Xander took another swallow. This time, he only hissed in response to the burning liquid. Exchanging meaningful looks with Jesse which was followed by a swift nod and a grab for the bottle by the slighter boy, Xander turned a faintly serious expression towards Malcom.

"Yeah, see... The first night we came here and got blitzed off of stolen hooch was the first Friday after Jesse's twelfth birthday. See, Jesse's old man got arrested for Jesse's birthday for grand theft auto and assault with a deadly weapon when he pistol whipped some guy for his car."

Jesse handed the now half empty bottle over to Malcom again.

"That was the best damn birthday present I've *ever* gotten. Too bad *your* old man can't get you the same gift, eh Xan?"

Malcom took another sip of the whiskey and gasped for air while Xander just frowned deeply and shared a high-five of agreement with Jesse. Malcom flashed Xander an odd look and then handed the bottle over to the dark haired teenager.

"So... what's up with *your* dad? I mean... what's he do to you?"

Xander grimaced and took a *big* gulp of the alcohol. He didn't even flinch at it's burn.

"The question is more like... what *doesn't* he do?"

Malcom raised up an eyebrow and Jesse lit another smoke before snubbing out his old one. He turned a serious expression to Malcom that was far too old for any fourteen year old to wear.

"Look Malcom. If we tell you... you *gotta* swear to secrecy. Okay? And you can't... freak out. At all. Got it?"

Malcom nodded. Xander took another swallow and didn't offer the bottle around anymore. His expression had gone perfectly blank, as if he was trying to mentally distance himself from the topic at hand. His own life. It was Jesse who spoke instead.

"See... Xan's folks are... well, they're drunks and Xan says they do drugs too, but *I've* never seen it. But that don't mean shit, they could hide it from me easily. And Xan's dad, he's always been pretty free with his fists, but ever since..."

Jesse trailed off and glanced over at the dark haired boy. Xander gave him an almost non-existent nod and then Jesse continued.

"Well, ever since Mr. Harris found out about Xan and me... Fuck it! He caught us fooling around and shit. Ya know, having sex! *Together*. Well... he's taken to stomping on Xan's ribs on a *real* regular basis. Says he's trying to kick the pansy out of him."

Malcom blinked and was quiet for a moment. Then he turned and looked up at the two young boys, an odd gleam in his eyes.

"That really sucks man. I mean, the guy *could* have found a non-violent way to deal with the whole situation. He doesn't have to, ya know, *beat* you or anything."

Xander nodded silently and took another swallow. He closed his eyes against a wave of dizziness and then passed the almost empty bottle to Jesse who quickly finished it off. That was when Malcom spoke again, his voice cutting through Xander's drunken mind and grabbing his attention.

"Did you ever just wish things were different? I mean, if you could have one wish to change something about your life, what would it be?"

Without even hesitating and thinking about his answer, Xander opened his eyes and looked over at his new friend.

"Me? *I* wish that my parents hadn't raised me. I wish that they had put me up for adoption or something so that I could have had a *real* family. Not this... fucked up life I'm trapped in. *That's* what I wish."

Xander watched in drunken amazement as Malcom's soft features twisted and became wrinkled and withered. His eyes glowed and he seemed to become something out of a nightmare. Then he spoke a single word in a voice that reminded Xander of the time he'd run his fingernails down the blackboard at school.

"Done."

There was a bright flash of light and Malcom disappeared. Then, with too much alcohol running through his system, Xander passed out.

*******

September 1996

"Alex! Wake up already! Mom is going to be *so* mad. This is the second time I've come in here and you're *still* in bed."

Xander opened his eyes and looked into the face of an annoyed blonde girl with beautiful eyes. She seemed *very* familiar, but he couldn't recall her name. He looked around and wondered where his boyfriend was. Je... J... *something*. Little by little the details faded and he looked around his room again. Things began to click into place and memory rushed in again.

A dream. It had all been a bad bad dream. Alex remembered how he had felt for the cute younger boy. Well... not *all* of it had been bad.

He turned a sleepy eye up to his sister and waved her over to sit on the edge of his bed.

"Buffy, come over here. I *gotta* tell you about my dream before it slips away."

Her eyes suddenly sparkling, Buffy bounced over and plopped on the end of his bed by his feet, curling her legs up under her. He was just about to tell her about the cute boy and the tree house by candlelight when a young girl in a Blessed Mother Elementary School uniform peeked her head into the room. Alex and Buffy both grabbed a pillow and tossed them at her.

"Go away Dawn. This is *teenager* stuff. You're too young. Go finish getting ready for school. *We* still gotta pack for the move."

The young girl turned away and ran down the hall, her teary cry of "Moooommmm" ringing in the air.

His sister Buffy turned her full attention back to him with a wicked smile on her face.

"Okay Alex. I'll make ya a deal. You tell me about the cute boy *you* dreamed about and I'll tell you about the cute boy *I* dreamed about."

Alex mirrored her grin.

"Deal. Besides, who knows, maybe these mystery dream guys are just waiting for us to move to Sunnydale and save them from their boring lonely lives. Right?"

********

October 2000

There was a huge flash of blinding light and then Alex felt as if he was being ripped into a thousands pieces. Something horrible was going wrong with the spell. It *had* to be the work of Red Queen. Only *she* was strong enough in magic to disrupt a spell that he and his step-dad were working. He groaned at the pain and felt a rush of panic when he couldn't even hear his own voice. Then there was a sudden bone-jarring lurch and Alex felt himself laying on a cold linoleum floor.

Opening his eyes he saw that he was still in his step-dad's Magic Shop and that his sister was hovering over him with a concerned look in her eyes. There seemed to be a few people gathered here, but he ignored them. Focusing his blurred vision on Buffy, he reached up and grabbed for one of her hands.

"Help... up... please..."

The wind had been knocked out of him hard and it wasn't easy to squeeze those words out. Instantly, his sister easily, but gently helped him back up to his feet. He leaned on her, confident in her superior strength to support his wobbly knees while he tried to quickly gather his wits. After a few deep breaths, he felt much better and he glanced up at her with a rueful grin.

"Thanks Sis... don't know what happened. Kinda hurt though."

Alex blinked in mild surprise. He reached out and gently lifted a lock of her soft golden hair confused.

"You cut it. *Short*. When did you do that? And why? I thought Riley liked it long?"

His sister just stared at him as if he'd said something strange and he wasn't sure *what* it was, but he didn't give her a chance to answer. He had spotted someone he hadn't even been aware had come into the shop and was walking over to him.

Reaching out to run a gentle hand through the icy blonde hair, Alex grinned wickedly.

"What? Did you and Sis do each other's hair? Doesn't matter. I'm just glad you went back to blonde. *Much* better this way. Definitely yummy."

That said, Alex grabbed the collar of Spike's leather duster and pulled the vampire in for a deep possessive kiss. His love stiffened in shock for a moment and Alex wondered when the normally exhibitionist vampire had gotten shy, but then Spike melted into the kiss and opened up for his tongue.

He was just getting ready to pull his lover into the back room for a little quick fun when the shocked voices of the people in the shop, his sister in particular, caught his attention. He broke off the kiss with a gasp and looked over his shoulder at her in confusion.

"Buf? Who's this *Xander* you keep yelling about? He a new Vamp in town or something?"

Suddenly, the room fell silent and everyone was staring at him as if he was a wack-o from mars. Just then his step-dad walked in and Alex sighed in relief. If *anyone* could figure out this confusion, *he* could.

"Yo! G-man!"

He got glared at.

"I've *asked* you not to call me that."

Alex grinned mischievously and rolled his eyes.

"Sorry Pop. Won't happen again. So... who's this Xander guy that has Sis all freaked? He a Demon? A vampire? What?"

His step-dad came to a stuttering halt and seemed at a loss for words. Alex wondered what the hell was wrong with the guy when a flash of color caught his attention. He turned to see the slight pale red-head and felt a wash of panic roll over him.

"Holy shit Buf! It's the Red Queen! Dust her or something!"

With that, Alex tossed his sister a stake that he had grabbed from the nearest counter and began chanting in a loud voice while pointing at the wicked and evil vampire that had somehow wandered into their midst. He was just about to let loose with a blast of pure energy when Buffy stepped in front of him screaming at him to stop.

"Xander! What's *wrong* with you? Why are you attacking Willow? And what's up with that tongue action with Spike? Did you hit your head or something?"

*******

A half hour later

His sister... no, make that the Slayer, wrinkled her nose up in thought and put her now empty mug of hot chocolate on the table. They had all calmed down enough to figure out what was *really* going on. Now he was trying to explain to them about the alternate universe that *he* was from. The group included Giles, Buffy, Riley, Spike, some strange girl named Tara that he didn't recognize and, chillingly, the girl Willow who on *his* world was the vampire known as Red Queen. Finally, Buffy broke the silence.

"Let me see if I've gotten all of this right. You are my brother and we call you Alex?"

He nodded.

"Yeah, Alex. Alexander Harris Summers-Giles to be exact. Mom and dad adopted me after my... uh, biological-parents were killed in a car crash. Margaret was still pregnant and they had to remove me from her body. Mom wanted me because her best friend in college had been killed saving Mom's life from a drunk burglar with an itchy trigger finger. Bethany literally threw herself in front of the bullet. Well, Bethany had been Margaret's older sister. So..."

Buffy nodded.

"That... sounds like Mom."

Alex grinned softly at her and she continued.

"So, then we moved here to Sunnydale. We met Giles. I became the Slayer and you began to study magic?"

Alex nodded at her.

"Well... actually. I tend to concentrate on sorcery and summoning, but yeah. I guess I do have a basic knowledge of most forms of magic. Pop's the one to *really* go to if you have a question though."

"Okay. That's something I still don't get. *Why* do you call Giles 'Pop'?"

Alex shrugged.

"That's easy. He's our step-dad on my world. Him and Mom got married about... oh... two and a half years ago. You were the Maid of Honor, Dawn was the flower-girl and I was Best Man. We partied the whole two weeks they were gone on the honeymoon. We both got grounded once they got back because, my then, boyfriend Larry set the backyard on fire when he knocked over the grill. I mean, Mom *really* missed those roses and I had to replace every single bush."

Alex rolled his eyes at the memory and leaned back into Spike when the blonde vampire laughed out loud. Remembering that it wasn't *his* boyfriend, he stiffened up and went to draw away again, but then Spike slipped his arm around his waist and he relaxed again.

Buffy looked a little flustered and Giles had a deep blush on his face, but Riley and Willow were intrigued. It was Riley who asked the next question.

"Um, Alex. You mentioned something about Buffy's hair? What was *that* about?"

Alex smirked at his sister... um, the Slayer and her boyfriend.

"Well... it's like this. My sister and your double are engaged to be married. She's been growing her hair long for the wedding. It's almost down to her waist now. When I saw *your* Buffy, I thought she had finally gotten mad enough at the braid she usually wears it in to cut it off. She's threatened to do it several times, but you... or rather, your double, always manages to talk her out of it."

Buffy and Riley both blushed, glanced at each other with wide eyes and then blushed again. Alex stifled a giggle. He could still torment his sister, even if she wasn't technically his sister on this world.

Then Willow asked a question and Alex flinched involuntarily back against Spike at hearing her voice.

"Um... and me? What was that whole Red Queen thing?"

Alex swallowed and looked at the table top. Willow seemed like a nice girl, but his memories of her were *vastly* different than what was sitting before him.

"Um... yeah. Well, *technically*, even though you're around me and Buf's age, you're Spike's Aunt. You were turned by a vampire named Darla. At first, you were one of the Master's servants, but as Darla's favored Childe, you had many privileges that other young vampire's didn't get. *Now* you are the leader of the group that *we*, my family and our friends, fight against. They call you the Red Queen and you live with Angelus in the old mansion. He's chipped like Spike, but it hasn't been spell modified, so... he's still a bad guy."

Willow went pale and the others got *real* quiet. Bad news does that to people. It was finally Giles who broke the silence.

"Um... Alex? Just how many vampires on your world have chips? And what do you mean about them being... um, spell modified?"

Alex squeezed Spike's hand when he felt the vampire tense behind him.

"Oh. That. Um... we *know* of twenty-three survivors. When Buffy and Riley found out about the Adam experiment that the Initiative was *really* working on, Riley blew the whole conspiracy out of the water. Of course, there was a *massive* cover-up and this *is* Sunnydale, so... Anyway, there's twenty-three vampire's who have been implanted with the chip, which was only a first step in the Adam project. At least for the undead.

Spike was the only one who managed to escape once captured, and it was he who helped us release the others. *Most* of them followed Spike's lead and sided with us. Eight went with Angelus back to the Red Queen. The other fifteen moved into the old factory with Spike.

 

We supplied them with blood and in exchange Spike had them help us fight whenever there was a rather nasty demon in town. Not to mention they helped us against the Red Queen's minions.

The spell modification is something Pop and I put together. It's a neat piece of sorcery, if I do say so myself. The plans Riley stole that showed what the chip was and how it was implanted showed us that it was nothing that we could remove without killing the vampire. However, we were able to use the circuits and the implanted wiring throughout the brain to over-ride it's basic programing.

The spell doesn't make it so that a chipped vamp can *attack* a human and they *still* can't bite. But they can now *defend* themselves if attacked first. In many cases, especially with the smarter and more self-controlled vampires, like Spike for example, have found that the spell allows them to actually *like* certain humans. In fact, most of our chipped vamps hold steady jobs as night watchmen at various businesses and a few work as personal bodyguards. Pay is usually donated human blood, but some will except cash too. The spell modified chipped vampires have created a whole new cash crop in *my* Sunnydale. Blood donation.

And they all follow Spike as their leader. And since Spike works with *us*, his vampire's more often then not join us in various... adventures."

Everyone just stared at him with varying ranges of shock etched on their faces. Alex shrugged. In for a penny, in for a pound. He took a deep breath and continued.

"Recently, Riley heard some rumors from some of his contacts that the government has been secretly considering doing a nationwide sweep for vampires. They want to chip them all now. I guess they figure that if they can duplicate the results of our spell modification directly into the chip itself, then they can make chipped vampires legal citizens. Personally, I think that they see dollar signs concerning unending tax money, but then again, I'm cynical.

Spike and his followers are... of a mixed feeling about it. On the one hand, they want to see *their* numbers increase. It would be safer from other demons that way if their group wasn't an... anomaly. However, they also remember how *painful* it was to get the chip in the first place. And it says a *lot* when a soulless demon wouldn't wish a particular torture on their own worst enemy. Know what I mean?"

The room was still quiet as everyone tried to absorb all of the things that he had told them. He waited. He was sure that if he had been in their place, he'd be thrown for a loop too. Finally, Buffy attempted to lift the tension and lighten the mood.

"So... from that lip-lock action you had going on with Spike earlier, I'd say that you aren't with Anya?"

Alex frowned in confusion.

"Who's Anya? Never heard of the guy. No, Spike and I have been a couple since about three weeks after his escape from the Initiative. I was vampire sitting for Pop and studying for mid-terms when he started yelling his head off. Went over to see what was going on and found out he was sleeping through a nightmare. When I woke him up, we talked about it. After that... things just kinda went from there I guess."

Willow frowned at him.

"Okay... so. You're dating Spike now. And you *were* dating Larry when Joyce and Giles got married, but... when did you date Cordelia?"

Alex blinked at her.

"*Cordelia*? The *cheerleader*! Why in the world would I date her? I've never dated a female in my life, and if I *did*, it wouldn't have been *her*."

Alex shuddered at the thought.

"Look. I know you guys have a million questions, but could we move on to other things? Like... how do we get me back home?"

*********

Two hours later

There was another flash of bright light and the sensation of being shattered swept over him again. With a jarring lurch, he once more found himself lying on the floor of the magic shop. Wincing, he picked himself up and dusted himself off. Looking around he saw familiar faces that were staring at him in barely restrained expectation. He gazed at one face and then moved on to the next. He *felt* like he was back home, but he wasn't sure. Then he saw a person he hadn't expected to see and he flinched slightly.

"Um... ahh... not to sound *too* weird or anything, but... you weren't planning to... I don't know,... *kiss* me, were you Spike?"

At the loud relieved laughter of his friends and the teasing head shake no from the blonde vampire, Xander slowly allowed himself to relax.

"Good. I've got to tell you guys, this has been one *different* kind of day for me. First I got zapped into a parallel world and then the fangless wonder stuck his tongue down my throat. I didn't know whether to scream in horror or if I should just stake him."

Everyone but Spike laughed at that. The vampire seemed to be offended at the whole concept. Buffy quickly cut off any comment he could make however.

"Welcome home Xander."

The young man grinned at his friend.

"Thanks. Sorry to blink in from another world and run, but I have got to go find Anya. We had plans and I don't want her mad. I'll tell you guys about everything tomorrow. Okay?"

And with that, Xander dashed out the door.

********

Very late that same night

Malcom stood in the deep shadows of the small apartment bedroom and scowled at the couple sleeping peacefully. His beloved, his eternal delight, his other half... was *mortal*. How he longed to just appear before his beautiful Anya and grant her greatest wish. To become a demon again.

Unfortunately, he couldn't.

However, he wasn't going to let that stop him. He wanted his beloved back and he had a plan on how to do that.

The mortal, Alexander Harris was a key element to that plan. First he would go into the past and find the younger version of this Xander. Then he would grant him *his* greatest wish. The world would then change enough that Anya would *never* feel the need to come to Sunnydale and help out Cordelia Chase. Thus, she'd never become mortal and be forced to leave his side.

Grinning wickedly, Malcom vanished without a sound.

 

END: With a twist of reality on the side...

Notes:

This orphaned work was originally on Pejas WWOMB posted by author Scorpio.
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