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Aftermath 3: Some Other Rainbow
A "Farscape" story
Written by Alison M. DOBELL
* * * * *

Zhaan had done what she could for him, but beyond stabilising his condition and making him as comfortable as possible she could do no more. He lay on his back and stared up at the ceiling. Despite his growing depression he was glad that somebody had got something out of all this. Found a purpose. A sense of direction. Something to hang their hope on to. He had nothing. Only memories so fragmented he could only touch them with his thoughts at random. Unable to even control his emotions. /That was crap. He had no control. Not even the illusion of it. Sorry Dad, but what you see is what you get/

He thought it was an ironic twist of fate that out of everybody he knew, all his friends on Moya, it should be Crais who spent the most time with him. The man spent arns just sitting there talking softly to him. Keeping him company. It was bizarre. At first he had been angry, raging inside. Wishing he would just go away and leave him the hell alone. Crais did not go. Showed no sign of being offended. Eventually Crichton had let go of the anger. He was not really angry at him anyway. He was angry at himself. The Universe. The whole damn shebang. But mostly he was angry at Scorpius. The evil son of a bitch who had done this to him. To Aeryn. He closed his eyes to stop the tears. Vaguely aware that Crais had stopped talking. He opened his eyes, cheeks damp and eyes glassy. Crais was looking at him. Not with pity but understanding and something he had never expected to see on the former military commander's face: compassion. He could feel the tears welling up again. /Oh crap. He was turning into John-boy Walton/

"I am sorry if my presence upsets you. I should leave."

Crais started to get up. Crichton felt an odd sense of panic. The only thing keeping the walls of loneliness from crushing down on him was this man's presence. /Don't leave me, Crais. I can't stand it/

He paused as their eyes met and hesitated. "Do you want me to go?"

Crichton blinked his eyes slowly. Twice. As Crais had taught him. The effect on him was unexpected. For a moment Crais was lost for words. Too moved to speak. He nodded slowly and sat back down. Patted Crichton briefly on his shoulder and schooled his features once again. "Very well. Let me tell you about the time I was stranded in the Marjella system. My ship had lost propulsion. We were damaged from enemy fire. Essentially flying bliind..."

* * * * *

D'Argo was furious. Pacing Zhaan's apothecary like a caged animal. Zhaan was trying to work on some cultures. Still hoping that she might find a way to help Crichton.

"What does he think he is doing, Zhaan? We should never have let that abomination aboard Moya!"

"Would you also deny the improvement in Aeryn since Talyn gave his help?"

The Luxan turned to face her. "No, but that does not mean I have to like it. And this charade Crais is playing with John.... It is...offensive."

"Aeryn says he has changed."

He let out a huff of disgust. "Peace Keepers do not change, Zhaan."

"Aeryn did."

He opened his mouth to explain that Aeryn was different then shook his head at her. "You know what I mean. Stop twisting my words."

Zhaan half closed her eyes as she looked at him. "And what words are those?"

Realising that he was wrong he simply ignored the question. He started pacing again. "What is he doing in there with John? One of us should be present."

The Delvian Priestess sighed and put down a phial. "D'Argo, Crais is simply talking to John, that's all. Sometimes he just sits."

"Yes, but why?"

"I think he does it to keep him company."

"Sometimes Zhaan you are too trusting for your own good. He is up to something."

"And sometimes sweet D'Argo you fail to simply see what is before your eyes."

Anger flashed in him. "John does not want Crais's pity."

Zhaan sighed and picked up a glass container with some herbs she had been crushing for Aeryn. "Now, if you'll excuse me, I am going to see Aeryn."

"I'll come with you." D'Argo rumbled.

Zhaan paused and looked back at him. "Are you sure you wouldn't rather spy on John and Crais? I'm sure Pilot could spare a DRD you could use."

He glared at her and Zhaan hid a smile. Aeryn was sitting up in bed when they entered her room. Zhaan looked pleased. "How do you feel, Aeryn?"

"Better, thank you." She was looking around as if she had lost something. "Where are my clothes, Zhaan?"

"Chiana took them away to clean them."

She looked surprised. "Chiana is washing my clothes?"

Zhaan inclined her head and smiled. Something of Aeryn's mood changed and she was less irritable. Then she noticed Zhaan was approaching with the glass container. "What is that?"

"Something to aid your body in its' recovery."

She backed up on the bed. "I don't need anything, Zhaan. I feel fine. What I *do* need is to find some clothes. I want to see Talyn and thank him for helping me then I want to find John." She paused and frowned. "I thought I would have seen him by now."

"You have been sleeping much of the time Aeryn."

Aeryn looked at them for a moment. Wondering what it was that Zhaan was not telling her. Things slowly slotting into place in her mind. "Yes, but I'm awake now Zhaan. Where is he?"

"In his room, but..."

Aeryn was out of the bed in one movement. D'Argo averted his eyes but not before he had seen her completely naked body. Zhaan could see she was absolutely determined to have her own way. She nodded reluctantly, a look of disapproval on her face. "Stay here Aeryn. I will go and get Chiana to bring you some clothes."

Aeryn sat back on the bed and pulled a sheet around her. "Thank you so much, Zhaan." She said with polite sarcasm.

Once they were down the corridor and far enough away not to be overheard D'Argo turned to Zhaan. We have to tell her, Zhaan. Tell her about John."

Zhaan nodded, upset. It was true. She should have told Aeryn sooner but she had been so weak, they had almost lost her several times before the arrival of Talyn. "You are right D'Argo. And we *will* tell her." Zhaan stopped walking and looked at him. "You find Chiana, get Aeryn some clothes. I'm going to see how John is doing. Aeryn will want to see him and someone should speak to him."

D'Argo nodded and left, firm confident strides taking him off in a different direction to Zhaan. She sighed to herself and made her way to John's quarters. She paused as she got to his doorway. Not meaning to eavesdrop but surprised by the gentleness of Crais's voice as he regaled Crichton with tales of his adventures as a Peace Keeper. She smiled sadly and waited for him to pause before intruding. Crais got up, immediately contrite for staying so long.

"Forgive me, Zhaan, I should go and see how Talyn is. He gets distressed if I am away from him too long."

Zhaan inclined her head graciously. "No forgiveness is necessary. We are indebted to you and Talyn for what you have done for Aeryn and for spending time with John."

He made a rueful face. As he flicked a glance at Crichton it turned into a brief smile. "I am not sure I am not simply boring him, Zhaan."

"I'm sure John finds your stories rivetting, Crais, don't you John?"

He smiled and closed his eyes once. Once for yes. Zhaan looked at Crais, he was beaming. Looking like nothing so much as a proud father. "John agrees with you, Zhaan."

Zhaan smiled with happiness and touched Crichton's face. Pleased that he had found a way to communicate, however rudimentary it might be. It showed that he was able to follow their conversations. That his brain, however damaged by Scorpius, was still capable of functioning.

"You can talk to him, Zhaan." Crais continued gently. She sat on the side of his bed, her beautiful face angled towards him, her eyes on his silent face. "John can blink once for yes and twice for no so you need to frame any questions so that he can give you a simple reply."

Zhaan nodded, she did not look at Crais. She knew there would never be a better time to tell him about Aeryn. "John, I have something to tell you. Aeryn is awake now. Thanks to Talyn she is healed but still a little weak. Aeryn wants to see you."

She saw the tears form in his eyes and touched his cheek. "Do you want to see Aeryn?" She said gently, her words soft in an attempt to cause him as little pain as possible.

What could he tell her? Every waking thought was filled with her. The pain, the guilt, the sorrow. The love. Tears rolled slowly down his face as he blinked. Once. Zhaan rested her forehead against his and slowly nodded. She had a connection to him since they had shared unity but it had begun before then. Unity had simply intensified and clarified her feelings for him. She did not want to see him hurt again but maybe it was time he started to come to terms with what had happened. Realise that the John Crichton who had deliberately crashed into Aeryn's prowler sending her to a watery grave was not him but Scorpius. Sooner or later they all had to face their demons and find a way to take the sting out of the past. She just wished she could save him from this trail of tears.

* * * * *

Ka D'Argo was deep in thought otherwise he might have been aware sooner that Chiana was not alone. He walked into his room in brisk strides, already starting to talk and tell Chiana what he wanted when the muffled sounds of two people making love brought him up short at the foot of his bed. He stopped, mouth open, heart thudding eratically in his chest. It could not be true. He did not want to believe it. Not of Chiana. But he had to know. He took another couple of steps, a hand reaching out to grab the covers, then he yanked them back to reveal Chiana and Jothee wrapped around each other in the heat of passion. He could not speak. Shock. Horror. Pain. Betrayal. Chiana recovered first, her face a picture of horror at being discovered like this. Jothee had her breast in his mouth, eyes closed, his hands doing things that were far too intimate for an audience.

D'Argo turned, tears in his eyes, about to storm out when he remembered why he had come. Without turning around he spoke to Chiana, the sorrow and heartbreak in his voice making her cry. "Aeryn is awake, Chiana. Zhaan asks that you take her clothes to her. She wants to see John."

He carried on walking and stopped again at the doorway. Jothee had now opened his eyes and realised what had happened. His face was full of fear and panic but his father did not say a single word to him nor did he turn around, even now. "That is *if* you can tear yourself away, Chiana..."

She watched D'Argo stalk out and off down the corridor. Jothee's hands moved in an intimate caress, still excited, still wanting her but she pushed his hands away. Annoyed. Not at him but at herself. Not because of what she was doing with D'Argo's son but because of what it was doing to D'Argo. How could she do this? How could she be this stupid? Tears ran down her china white face. Jothee sat up, confused and irritated. His father always spoiled everything. It never occurred to him that he was doing anything wrong. He tried to catch Chiana's hand as she hurriedly slid off the bed. "Chi, don't go!"

She ignored him, dressing quickly then hunting around for Aeryn's clothes. She looked back at him and wondered what she had seen in the spoilt little brat. Oh yeah, he could be cute, he could be fun, but he was also shallow and selfish. He was sitting up in bed now, trying to give her his most alluring look. He was also exciting. Chiana shook her head, she had to get going. The last thing she wanted was an angry, naked, former Peace Keeper storming in here demanding her clothes and seeing her with Jothee.

* * * * *

Crais had made himself scarce by the time Aeryn had dressed and got to Crichton's room. Zhaan was waiting for her. She explained to Aeryn what had happened, how Scorpius had manipulated Crichton into attacking her and bringing down her prowler. How the Scarran half-breed had then attacked and killed the doctor trying to remove the chip from Crichton's brain and stolen the chip, leaving him like this. Aeryn looked at her in disbelief then realised she was telling the truth. Zhaan watched Aeryn hesitate at the door, and drifted quietly passed her to let Crichton know his visitor was here. His eyes flickered open and looked passed Zhaan. He saw only Aeryn. His world, his universe, encompassed within the confines of that one beautiful being who had captured his heart and been slowly driving him nuts ever since. Not that he would have had it any other way.

Aeryn went to him, her face a shock of tears as she saw what they had done to him. Zhaan had warned her that he could not talk, at least not in a tongue any of them could recognise. It was gibberish, even worse than the pop culture slang that normally passed for coherent conversation. But right now she wished she could hear his voice, however it sounded. Be reassured that he was going to be alright. That they would be able to get through this. Somehow. Together. He watched the light refracting in her tears as she reached him, his heart aching so much with love for her, upset because she was upset. He had so much love in his heart for her. So many dreams he had hoped to be able to share. He looked at her rainbow tears, his own eyes blurring. Knowing that the chances of him ever being able to tell her how much he loved her were stacked against him. Impossible odds. She leaned in to him and kissed him, then clung to him as her body wracked with quiet sobs. Her heart too full of sorrow for her to be able to say anything.

/Some other rainbow, Dad. Some other time/ He wrapped his arms around her and held her. Too weak to hug her but too damned stubborn to let go. /Did I ever tell you, Dad, just how much my life here really sucks?/

Aeryn lifted her head and looked at him, wiping the tears from her face with the back of her hand. Scattering the coloured drops of light from her eyes. She looked at him, such love in that look that his heart lurched. He wanted to tell her how much he loved her. That he was sorry. For so many things. For everything. As if she knew what was going through his mind her hand drifted up to touch his lips then she kissed him gently, lovingly. Putting everything she could not say in words into her kiss. Letting her lips tell him in a language that needed no interpretation. He opened his mouth, letting her tongue twine gently with his, the kiss deepening as they took comfort in each other. His eyes closing in a prayer and a song. Wondering if they would ever find the rainbow. But then he did not need it any more. He was already holding his pot of gold...

********** T H E E N D **********