Work Text:
How to Become A Queen
By David Lee Rickman II
***
"Hi Olga. How is Paris?"
"Fine Talmedge. It's strictly business of course."
"Of course. I am sure it is an honor to be invited to a meeting of the Royal Society. Have you had any time to sightsee yet?"
"No, I've only had time to visit some of the libraries."
"Well, don't do anything I wouldn't do."
****
"No! No! Don't steal base! Ahhh!" Donnovan chuckled as Parker yelled at the television set. "Do you want to take back your comments about the Yankees?"
"Darn that Chipper Jones! Darn!"
"Frank, would you like to pay the thirty dollars now or later?"
"You laugh, but this is just the second game. Don't count on a sweep."
Donnovan reached for another beer. "O.K. Frank. But the world is pretty calm now. Don't count on a backstep to weasel out of our bet."
****
The librarian of the Paris Academy of Technology walked up to the table. "Hello, Dr. Vulkavich."
Olga looked up at the stranger. "Do I know you?"
The librarian chuckled. "No, I just saw your picture in the morning paper." The librarian handed her the paper. "Second row. Third from the left." The librarian looked around nervously. "If you're really interested in physics, we have one of Einstein's original notebooks."
"You have some of Einstein's original notes?"
"Yes. They're in our rare book section. They are not available to the public, but since you are a renowned scientist, you can see them if you want."
"Can I see them now?"
"Follow me." The young librarian led Olga to the end of a long hall in the back of the library. "Right in there."
Olga went into the room. "Hey this room is empty!" The door locked behind her. "Hey! What's going on? Hey!" The room began to fill with smoke, and Olga became unconscious.
****
"Four days ago, Dr. Olga Vulkavich came up missing. We have reason to believe she was kidnapped, but we don't know by who or why, and we haven't received any ransom note."
"Has the NSA authorized a backstep?"
"Yes. If whomever kidnapped her knows about Project Backstep, they may be waiting for the seven day window to close before sending a ransom note. We can't wait that long."
"So, when do I backstep?
"Immediately. But there is one order from the NSA to you."
"What is that?"
"You can't intervene until the attempt to kidnap Olga is completed. The NSA wants to catch them and stop them if they are a risk to our nation's security."
"So you want me to stalk Olga until the kidnap occurs?"
"Yes."
"Paris, here I come!"
****
"O.K. Parker. The coordinates are set. This should be a good backstep."
"Thanks Ballard. Have you made any modifications to the sphere lately?"
"Not lately. I've been too busy with paperwork."
"That's good."
Talmedge grabbed the microphone. "Parker, you should arrive four hours before Olga disappeared. Let everything be normal until something happens to her. Call us then."
"Will do."
"Reactor to 80%...90%...100%. Engage Mr. Parker."
The sphere immediately started to gyrate rapidly.
"C'mon. C'mon.," Parker coaxed. The clock flipped from Thursday to Wednesday. Sparks started to fly from the controls. "No! Please no!" Parker though to himself as the sphere suddenly stopped at Tuesday. "No! I am two days late now! D--- sphere." Parker decided to jump out of the sphere and see where he was. "Now I wish Ballard had done some modifications."
After Parker jumped out of the sphere, he found a group of people religiously bowing in front of the sphere. "Hi everybody. Uh, do any of you speak english?"
A nicely dressed man came from the back of the group. "The prophecy has been fulfilled and our King has returned from the heavens in an egg. Just as the prophets foretold."
"Look guys...I..."
"Are you our returning king?"
"I wouldn't exactly say..."
The people started looking up.
"Ah...Yes. I am your King and I have returned." Parker didn't want to find out what they did with imposteurs.
"At last the day has come! Please follow me to your quarters in the monastery." As the well dressed man led Parker around what appeared to be a religious compound during the next hour, Parker wished he could be alone for a few moments to call NNL. This is no way to find Olga. She might not even be in France by now as far as anyone knew. "And now King Parker.," The man led Parker into a dimly lit room. "It is time to select your queen from our Harem so you can lead us to our new era of existence."
"Gee, that's really nice but..." Parker then noticed a familiar face in the group. Parker wanted to shout out "Olga." but stopped himself. "As your king, I would like to select your new queen in private. I can't have mortals around as I search their souls to find the one worthy of governing the 'new era'." The well-dressed man looked at Parker for a moment. "Very well, I will see you again after you have chosen. Meet me in my office."
As the door closed, Frank Parker went to the middle of the room where Olga was. "Olga? Olga? Talk to me." Olga slowly blinked. "Are you the returning king we were told arrived? Have you chose me my king?" Parker got out his cell phone and dialed.
****
Talmedge answered the ringing phone. "Hello?"
"This is conundrum."
"Conundrum, I just received word from Paris that Olga hasn't been seen in two days. Is that the reason for your backstep?
"Well, I have good news and bad news about that. The good news is that I've found Olga. The bad news is that they've done something to her mind and they think I am a king."
"Who are "they'?"
"Some religious cult."
"O.K. Conundrum. We've triangulated your cell phone and we'll send help as soon as possible."
Parker put away his phone. "O.K. Olga. Time we left."
Parker helped Olga get up on her feet.
"Thank you for choosing me my king. I will bear you many strong children."
****
The well-dressed man looked up as Parker helped Olga into his office. "I have chosen my queen."
"Ah, you have chosen Choomia. A great choice!"
"Choomia?"
"It is Romanian meaning 'a kiss.'"
"Yes, well I need to take my queen back to the heavens. You know, I need to prepare a few things."
"King Parker, will you please close my office door?"
Parker complied immediately.
"O.K. let's be honest now. You're not a king."
"Of course I am."
"No you are not. I know because this whole religion I started. This whole religion is a hoax."
The well-dressed man picked up a pocketknife. "What would happen if all the followers saw you bleed from a cut. What if they saw how mortal you really are? They will see if you are not honest with me."
"If you knew, then why did you go along with it?"
"Because strangely enough, that ball you landed in fit closely to the prophecy trash I fed them. You helped me convince them of everything."
The well-dressed man pointed the pocketknife at Olga who was barely aware of what was going on. "Look at the woman dressed in expensive silk robes named Choomia. Do you know who she really is? Remember to be honest with me."
"Dr. Olga Vulkavich."
"I thought so. Look at her and look at yourself. Look at everyone in this compound. Everybody here will be dead in an hour. Except for me of course."
"How?"
"Drinking the ceremonial wine. Except today it will be laced with poison."
"We won't drink."
"You will or you will be shot and be shown as mortal and a fraud. Your choice."
****
Later that hour the members of the cult sat around in a circle with Frank, Olga, and the well-dressed man now dressed in robes at the center of the circle.
"Olga, I don't want you to drink this.," Parker whispered to Olga. "But I must my king."
Parker felt the well-dressed man poke him in the back with the gun he hid under his robes. "Keep quiet you."
Just then somebody shouted "Trucks are coming!"
The well-dressed man looked at the government vehicles pulling up. "Parker, you called them, didn't you?" "I thought I'd invite a few friends. I hope you have room." Parker noticed the well dressed man look around nerviously. "I'd shoot you Parker if I had bullets in my gun."
The well dressed man got up, but Parker tackled him before he could run. "Where do you think you're going buddy? I am delivering you to your new existance. And you'll be there a long, long time."
****
Donnovan raised up a glass of beer. "To Frank Parker, the man who would be king. And who for some reason called off our bet. Yankees rule!" Parker raised his glass. "And to Olga, who would be my queen."
"King Parker my foot!," Ramsey shouted from across the room.
"Parker, you're sure your mission was to rescue Olga by pretending you were a king returning from the heavens."
"Yeah. It was all Mentnor's idea."
"And you happened to lose the microchip?"
"Things happen."
"Somehow I have a feeling I'll read a different story in your autobiography." Talmedge remarked skeptically. Ramsey shook his head. "As if the ramblings of the Unabomber wasn't bad enough."
***
As the Alpha team joked amongst themselves in the debriefing room, Olga pulled Frank to the side to talk to him privately.
"Mr. Parker, I would like to thank you for saving me again and the others who were used by that cult."
"No problem."
"I don't remember much since they drugged and hypnotized me. Was I acting strange?"
"No. You were in perfect control as always."
"So Parker, what would it have been like to have been your queen?"
Parker smiled with a gleam in his eye. "On second thought, don't awnser that Mr. Parker."
"Well Olga, we'll always have Paris."
The End