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The Dark Corners of the Mind
by Aldaj
It had been a bad day from the very start. Although, as it is with most of these days, it started out with just a few little things going awry, until events escalated out of control within only a few minutes. When Olga Vukavitch woke up that morning, she had an uneasy feeling in her stomach, almost as if it was telling her that staying in bed would be the best course of action on the rainy Tuesday. She ignored the warning signs, and began to regret it almost immediately. The little problems accumulated before it was even noon. Her computer refusing to work, a splitting headache that appeared without provocation, and other incidents that wore her patience almost to the core.
It was while she was in her office that things began to spin at an alarming speed. Although what happened was something that everyone at Operation Backstep had been expecting, some even wishing, would happen, there was a startling aspect to the whole thing.
While she was sitting at her desk, she saw someone ran by her office door, followed almost immediately by another one, both with hurried voices. There was clearly something going on. Her curiosity getting the best of her, Olga walked to the door and stepped out into the small hallway. Seeing someone run around the corner ahead, she followed suit, and once having turned the corner, saw what all the commotion was about. Frank Parker was being thrown against a wall and held there by about 5 men, and giving them a hell of a fight for his freedom. Still not quite comprehending the whole thing, Olga looked to where more people were standing. In the middle of the group slouched Nathan Ramsey, his face bloody. Piecing together what had happened, Olga walked forward, stopping in plain view of everyone. In her best authoritative voice, she questioned Frank. "What is going on, Mr. Parker?!"
"The bastard attacked me, that’s what!!" Nate interrupted, his voice expressing his anger, but even more so his pain. He touched his lip, and pulled back a blood-covered finger. His face was already turning slightly red, but that would soon change to nasty blue and black bruises. From what Olga could see, Frank had been fairly thorough.
Without a word, Frank lunged towards Nate at exactly the right time. The men holding him back had loosened their grip upon Olga’s arrival, thinking Frank would calm down now that she was here; they were wrong. Breaking their grip, he slammed into Nate and they both crashed to the floor. In a flash, all the people that had stopped the fight swarmed over Frank, yanking him off the security advisor, throwing him across the wall once again. This time, Olga reached down and helped Ramsey to his feet. "Ramsey, go get checked out." Her voice was stern, but Ramsey still hesitated, staring at Frank who stared back with pure hatred.
"Go!" she yelled, and he finally slouched off, two men by his side to help if needed. Waiting until he completely out of site, Olga turned to face Frank. His face was still twisted in anger, and he showed no signs of calming down. Olga looked to the 3 men still holding Frank, and nodded her head to them, signaling that it was okay, they let him go, and walked away talking quietly to themselves about what had happened. As she stood in front of Frank, she tried her hardest to ask fierce, but knew it had little effect on him.
"Do you want to explain that?"
"No." His voice conveyed the same anger to her that his eyes had to Ramsey. She almost flinched, not ever hearing that cold of a tone before in her life. It had been one simple word, but it stung like a thousand knives. All this time she had thought that he cared for her, now she wasn’t so sure. Then again, this was not the same man that she knew, or thought she knew.
"You think you have a choice?" Olga recovered as quickly as she could, but she knew that Frank had seen her reaction.
"I don’t care."
Realizing that her approach was far from working, she switched modes, unsure if she meant to or not.
"I didn’t ask if you cared, Mr. Parker," she paused "I don’t think you understand what you just did. You just attacked the head of security for a CIA operation. It’s a very serious thing, with serious ramifications."
"What are you gonna do, fire me?" Almost spitting the last two words at her, he walked past her, towards her room. She simply stood there for a moment, in shock. Trying to organize her thoughts, she rubbed her eyes, staring at the floor. There had been someone else behind his eyes, it was not the same man. Something happened to him. When she looked up again, she jumped in surprise to see Donovan standing in front of her.
"What’s wrong?" She took a deep breath and studied the captain for a moment. Shaking her head, she sighed. "Mr. Parker just attacked Ramsey."
Donovan’s eyebrow immediately went up in surprise. "How bad?"
"I don’t know, it looked pretty bad. He went to get checked out. Mr. Parker is fine, physically." She paused as Donovan processed what she was telling him. "We’ve got a serious problem though. When Talmadge finds out, Parker will be in a lot of trouble."
"Ramsey was lucky." Craig said almost to himself. Olga narrowed her eyebrows.
"Lucky?" she asked exasperatedly.
He looked at her for a few minutes, then answered carefully. "Olga, if Frank wanted to, he could have killed Ramsey in 10 seconds and not even broken a sweat."
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It was a side of Frank Parker that she hoped she would never seen. Or maybe in the back of her mind she hoped it was a part of him that didn’t even exist anymore except in the old war stories that Frank and Donovan would tell. She knew that Frank had been a CIA operative in covert-ops, and he had even used his training in some of their operations with Backstep. But she never in a million years thought that he would attack someone for no reason, or at least no reason that she knew of, other than Ramsey being his normal self. Even Frank had become used to just laughing off Ramsey’s annoying attitude and pay little attention, but it appeared that this time, Nate had gone to far.
Sitting back in her office that night, she digested what Donovan had told her. She knew it was true, Frank was a dangerous person. Olga was glad she only saw the end of the attack, or otherwise, she didn’t know what she would have done. You don’t get in the way of someone that you know could kill you with his bare hands. Of course someone had, thankfully, before Frank could finish what he started.
It hadn’t taken long for Talmadge to find out, after all, gossip around Never Never Land runs rampant. Frank was locked in his room still as angry as before. He had threatened numerous people, including Talmadge himself, which was needless to say, not wise at all.
As it turned out, Frank did quite a number on Ramsey. In addition to the broken nose and bruises all over his face, he had two broken ribs and a nasty cut on his forehead. Olga hadn’t seen him yet, he was probably resting, but she knew that when she did finally see him, it would not be a pretty sight.
"Olga!" Her head snapped up in surprise and she saw John Ballard in the doorway.
"Sorry, I was just thinking. What’s going on?"
"Talmadge just called a meeting, starts in five."
She nodded, saying she would be there in a second, and Ballard left. Standing up behind her desk, she straightened her shirt. This was not something she was looking forward to. The topic of conversation would no doubt be about what was going to happen to Frank. It didn’t seem right to Olga to talk about him when he wasn’t even there, but she knew it was for the better. If Frank was at the meeting, she didn’t know how he would act, considering how he had been cold to her, and that might not be very good for his case.
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When Olga walked into the meeting, she quickly sat in an empty chair next to Donovan. She hoped that maybe since he and Frank were good friends, he would be able to give her some news. He simply looked at her and shook his head. Not a very good sign, she thought.
"OK, everyone. We have hit a serious wall in Operation Backstep." Talmadge began. "We need to find a new Backstep pilot immediately." Olga almost felt her jaw hit the floor. People around the table had similar expressions on their faces, no one quite expecting what Talmadge had just said. Donovan was the first to speak.
"Sir, what…"
Before he could finish, Talmadge raised his hand to silence him. "I assume you all would like to know about Mr. Parker. We cannot have someone on this project that is a threat to himself or anyone else."
"Sir, just because he attacked one person…"
"Three."
Olga’s head snapped up in a flash. "What?"
"He attacked two more people, Doctor. One of them has a very serious concussion. A doctor has confirmed that his mental state is completely unstable." The tone of voice from Talmadge told them all that he was extremely angry, so no one asked questions. He paused, then he hit them all with another unexpected fact. "He has already been removed from the program and is being transported back to Hansen Island as we speak."
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Olga couldn’t stop pacing. She had been walking the same path in her office for almost 30 minutes. She couldn’t believe what had happened. After the meeting, she learned that Frank had attacked one man who brought him some food, and the other victim was a guard that was placed outside his door after the second attack. He had tried to escape, and almost had, when a group of security officers pulled their guns on him, and he had surrendered.
She rubbed a hand against her forehead, her eyes closed. It was so unlike Frank. He was only violent when he had to be, or when his life or someone else’s was in danger. Ramsey had been interviewed about the altercation, and from what he said, Frank had simply jumped him in the hall, saying nothing. At first Olga didn’t believe him, but when security played the surveillance tapes from the hallway, they backed up his story. Olga hadn’t been there when they viewed the tapes, but from what Donovan said, it was a good thing she hadn’t been. There was a 20-second delay from between Frank threw his first punch to when the help arrived.
Now he was gone. She admitted only to herself that she was, in some small way, relieved. When he had faced her down in the hallway, she had been deathly afraid of him. Still, she had to admit, she wished he wasn’t being sent back to Hansen Island. Frank had told her stories about the horrors he had seen in that place. Whenever he talked about the mental institution, his eyes got cold and sad. Her heart ached to think of him in a straight jacket. It was plainly clear to her that place had been like torture for him. Ironic that after he was tortured, he was sent to somewhere for more, only of a different kind.
She immediately regretted thinking about torture. She had seen the pictures of him after he had been rescued in Somalia, and had also heard things from Donovan. Upon his rescue, he had been extremely delusional, and didn’t even know his own name. His face had been a blank stare, with no soul behind eyes, and no emotion on his face. It had taken him almost 6 months before he began remembering things, and then the nightmares came. He still had them every once in a while, after all these years. She always knew when they were back. She would see it in the mornings, the dark circles under his eyes, and how defensive he got.
Half of her hoped she could convince Talmadge to reconsider. Frank had been the best Backstep pilot they ever had. It didn’t seem fair to her that to thank for his sacrifices, they would just cast him aside and begin looking for replacements. Olga saw the look on Donovan’s face when they all got the news. Donovan owed Frank his life, and they had also been friends for years. He had been clearly upset, but he simply walked quickly out of the room and out of sight.
Suddenly a thought came to Olga, and she stopped pacing. She wanted to visit him. Making up her mind, she grabbed her purse from a drawer in her desk, and left her office. She knew that Talmadge would more than likely never authorize a visit, but she had to try. She had to see for herself if the Frank she knew was gone and past the point of rescue.
Part Two
Part Two
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Olga got just what she expected. Talmadge told her that it would be a bad idea to visit Frank at Hansen Island due to his agitated state. She sat down in a chair across from his desk and stared at him.
"Have you talked to him?" She asked out of pure curiosity.
"Aside from when he threatened me, you mean? Olga, I know that you two have gotten close, but he’s not well. We should have known that if you take someone from a mental facility without them finishing their treatment, there’s a chance they may have a relapse."
She simply stared at her hands, then spoke quietly, but with her voice filled with conviction.
"You make it sound as if he’s some kind of person that’s always been in a mental institute. He’s not that crazy. I’m not sure if he’s even crazy at all. He just spent a few years serving this country and got his mind screwed with because of that."
Talmadge looked at her for a few moments. "I know." He paused again, studying Olga for a moment. "Alright, you can go see him." Talmadge replied, beside his better judgement. Olga smiled weakly.
"But I want you to take Donovan with you." She nodded, knowing that Talmadge was acting. He wanted her to think he wanted her to have company for safety, but she knew better than that. They both hoped that if Frank saw a friend, someone that he knew outside and before Backstep, it might help in the smallest, most feeble of ways.
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The plane seemed to take forever to reach its destination. Even as it did, it was a long helicopter ride to the island. When they finally landed and Donovan and Olga stepped out, they were greeted by the large, drab, white building. It looked to Olga more like a prison. She knew that this was where some dangerous people lived, so it was in some odd way, a jail. No one was allowed to leave, and if they did, they were supervised at all times. Their schedules were planned for them, right down to the last detail. Some were here for life, some just for a few weeks. Prison.
She wrapped her jacket tighter against her body, not as much from the cold weather as the creepy shiver that ran up her spine. Donovan placed a hand on the small of her back, guiding her to the main entrance, thinking the same things she was.
When they entered the main hallway, they both paused hesitantly. Donovan wanted to see his friend, but at the same time was giving this whole thing a second thought. He had felt sick the first time he had come to this place and seen his best friend, and the person that saved his life, in a straight jacket. This time they didn’t know what would be awaiting them. As they walked to the office, Donovan spoke to the receptionist.
"This is Dr. Vukovitch, I’m Captain Donovan. We called ahead, we’re here to see Frank Parker."
The lady behind the large desk nodded. "Of course. If you’ll just have a seat, his doctor will be right with you."
They sat on an old, brown couch by the door and waited in silence. Both wanted to say something, but neither knew just how to put it. After a few minutes, a doctor approached them and they both stood, grateful for him interrupting the silence.
"I’m Dr. O’Neill, Mr. Parker is my patient." He shook both their hands, then continued. "If you’ll follow me, I’ll take you to his room."
They began walking down a long plain hallway, and Donovan took advantage of the long walk to ask the question that was tugging at the back of both their minds.
"Doctor, how is he?"
The doctor looked at Donovan briefly, then responded. "Most of the time, he’s appears to be fine. He knows where he is, can answer any question you ask him, and is well tempered." He paused again.
"The rest of the time?" Olga asked, feeling her patience wearing thin.
"Well," the doctor cleared his throat, "he is extremely disoriented, doesn’t even know his own name, and is a violent risk to the people here. He has been placed in an isolation room for his own safety, as well as the workers here."
Thoughts flashed through Olga’s mind. It sounded the same as what she heard had happened right after Frank had been pulled out of Somalia. Her heart sank. She didn’t like the thought of Frank in isolation, but if it kept him from hurting others, she guessed it was for the best. She couldn’t picture Frank crazy, let alone being locked in a bare, empty room. She could only guess what it was like for him. He had a hard time being cooped up in NNL, and that was a large compound, so not being able to leave on tiny room must have been hell for him. Hell, a good name for this place, Olga thought to herself. She concluded from what Dr. O’Neill that Frank would more than likely be in a straight jacket, and she mentally prepared herself for it.
The trio continued down the long hallway, and finally reached the stairwell. Arriving on the second floor, they walked down the corridor, past the rooms on both sides. These were different from those on the first floor. They had only one very small window in each door, nothing else.
The thought of spending more than a couple hours in this place almost made Olga cringe. Everything about this place felt wrong to her. There was something about it that made her want to leave immediately.
Suddenly, the doctor stopped. He waved his hand to the door he was standing next to. "This is it."
Donovan stepped forward cautiously and peered through the window. Olga watched his profile, and saw his face fall, a sad look covering his eyes. He looked in the window for a few more seconds, and pulled back. Olga stepped forward, catching her breath.
Looking in the tiny window, she saw a small room, with white walls and white flooring, no windows and no furnishings of any kind. Glancing to the right, she saw Frank. He was sitting on the floor, his back against the wall. His legs were bent at the knees, and he was resting his head on them. All she could see of his face was the top of his forehead, and she thanked god for the small act of charity. If she had been able to meet his eyes, she knew she would have broken down.
"Did you want to go in?" Doctor O’Neill asked.
"How much longer is he going to be in there?" Olga asked, ignoring his question. The doctor looked at her and sighed.
"I really don’t know. There’s no way to tell."
"I’ll go in." Olga stated, startling Donovan.
"You sure Olga?" He asked her quietly, a concerned expression on his face.
"You’ll have to have a guard in with you, in case…" the doctor let his voice drift off, not finishing his sentence. He didn’t need to. Olga and Donovan both knew that it was in case Frank got violent. Olga closed her eyes briefly, trying to maintain her composure. She silently berated herself for getting this upset over Frank, after all the time she had convinced herself she felt nothing for him. It was now obvious she did.
"That’s okay, doc. I’ll go in with her. We’ll be fine."
Dr. O’Neill sized up Donovan, and nodded. Craig looked like the kind of person that could handle any situation. Frank was in a straight jacket so there was not much he could do anyway. The doctor reached into his pocket and pulled out a key ring. Taking one of the larger ones, he unlocked the door and pulling the door open, held it for the two visitors.
Olga immediately regretted it. It wasn’t what Frank did, it was what he didn’t do. He didn’t move. The large door wasn’t exactly quiet, so she knew he had heard them come in. He just stayed the same way, his head resting on his knees. Not knowing what to do with her hands, she put them behind her back, and looked at Donovan. He was staring at his friend, obviously trying to come to terms with the whole thing. Olga faced Frank again, and spoke quietly.
"Mr. Parker?"
She had been so quiet that she wondered if she had even spoke, maybe she just thought she had said his name. He spoke then, and she knew she hadn’t.
"Yeah?"
Her eyes opened a little wider. He sounded completely calm and like he always did. It was not what she had expected. Donovan and Olga exchanged glances.
"Are you alright, Frank?" Donovan asked. It was then that Frank slowly lifted his head and stared back at him.
"No." he stated matter-of-factly and without hesitation. "Would you be alright if you were in this place?" His eyes were filled with sorrow, but yet Olga saw something else in them. She couldn’t quite put her finger on it for a few moments, then it suddenly came to her. *fear* He was afraid.
"I’m sorry, Mr. Parker." He faced Olga and looked at her as if he was seeing her for the first time.
"Why are you sorry? You get to walk out of here any second you want." He paused, and a mischievous grin came over his face. "and you can move your hands."
As if to emphasis his point, he lifted his shoulders, and attempted to move his hands, but was hindered by the straight jacket. Olga sighed, she had been thinking the same thing when she first arrived at this place. He must have noticed her hesitation, because he spoke up and changed the subject, for which Olga was grateful.
"Anyway, what brings you two way out here? Things boring at NNL?"
"We just thought we’d come out here and see if you were staying out of trouble." Donovan said. Olga was glad he didn’t say anything about her being worried about him.
"Always." Frank smiled.
Olga’s heart crashed down to her knees. She didn’t know which was worse, Frank not knowing who they were and being agitated, or acting like nothing was wrong, and trying his hardest to make her smile.
Part Three
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Olga stood in front of the sink in one of the employee bathrooms on Hansen Island and stared at the reflection in the mirror. She had no idea what was wrong with her. She had barely been able to talk to Frank she had gotten so choked up. There had been something about the look in his eyes that made her want to cry. When they had finally left his room almost an hour after going in, she had felt like a little kid leaving their family pet behind, as weird as it sounded. Had she been alone at the time, she knew she would have burst into tears in the hallway.
But Donovan was right by her side, and for some odd reason, she felt that she had to put up some kind of brave front around him. Almost as if this whole situation shouldn’t be bothering her as much as it should be him. After all, he knew Frank for years before Olga had even met him. Before he was deemed mentally unstable, before he became the Backstep pilot. When he was a different person. Donovan was one of the only people to have ever met both Frank Parker’s. What had he been like before? Surely there was a drastic difference. No one who is captured by enemy soldiers, tortured, and put into a mental hospital for years is ever the same. She briefly wondered if he had the same sense of humor, and the same sense of honor.
Her mind flashed back to when they were all at the Rendezvous and Frank stopped four soldiers from bothering an old blind man. Donovan had reassured them all that four to one was a fair fight, and although at the time she had been unsure, she now knew that six to one was a fair fight. Frank was the kind of man that could become fierce when he thought wrong was being done to someone, finding not even the slightest bit of humor in the situation, and the next second, when the danger was gone, go back to his wisecracking remarks. Olga made a mental note to ask Donovan about the Frank that had been before hell had claimed his soul.
They had talked about various things in Frank’s room. He had been curious as to what was going on back at NNL, and they told him the truth, Nothing. Things had ground to a halt without a Backstep pilot. Olga didn’t talk much, she left that to Donovan. The two talked as if they were sitting in a bar, relaxing. A few war stories were told, one of which Olga hadn’t heard before, which was unusual. She thought she had heard them all so many times she could tell them herself. Frank asked if Patricia and Jimmy knew where he was, and Donovan told him they didn’t. He asked Frank if he wanted his ex-wife and son to know, and Frank said no. It had been hard for Jimmy the first time Frank was incarcerated. He didn’t want his son to go through it again.
When they left, Donovan promised to come back, and Frank had a grateful expression on his face. Olga simply nodded to him, and he understood. Frank didn’t know what to say to her either.
Donovan had left to go sit in one of the employee lounges minutes before, and Olga had excused herself to the restroom. She not only wanted time to herself, but had a feeling that Donovan wanted the same.
Now here she was, staring at her reflection, and trying her hardest to remember when it was she began to care so deeply for Frank Parker. As if the familiar face staring back at her would suddenly speak and tell her exactly what the problem was. It was hopeless, she knew.
Still she couldn’t pull herself away. In the back of her mind, perhaps she thought that if she focused on anything else, she would be reminded of where she was, and why she was there. If she looked away from her own eyes, she would see the pale white walls, the rusty metal fixtures, and the bars on the windows.
It was hard for her to realize that this was where Frank lived now. They wouldn’t be taking him back to NNL with them, they would fly off leaving him here alone. She knew that he would be able to take care of himself, it was clear he had done that for most of his life, but still she wanted to stay. Then the questions came back to her; why did she care so much? Maybe it was the fact that she loved Frank, she didn’t know. Maybe it wasn’t even him she loved, maybe it was just the idea of love and of someone loving her that she found so appealing. Olga stared down at her hands, suddenly confused.
When had the word ‘love’ come into the picture? The last thing she remembered, she was telling herself she didn’t care for him more than as friends, now she was talking about love? She wasn’t sure about anything anymore. The only thing she knew for sure was that it was wrong to her that Frank was locked up and treated like some animal. Olga felt herself getting angry, and tried to calm herself down.
Deciding that it would be more useful and a lot less frustrating to go and speak to Donovan, she pushed herself away from the sink. Closing her eyes, she turned her head away from the mirror and towards the door. Pulling it open, she walked into the long, drab hallway and went to the room where Donovan was.
As she approached him, she subconsciously smoothed the front of her shirt, and straightened herself to regain her look of composure. It all came falling down again when she saw Donovan talking to Dr. O’Neill, and a sad look on his face. Stopping where she was in the doorway, Olga heard the doctor tell Donovan that Parker had slipped back into his unresponsive and agitated state.
For what seemed like the hundredth time in the last two days, Olga felt as if she might break down. It was getting to be too much. They had just talked to Frank not less than 15 minutes ago, and now… now he wasn’t Frank anymore, just some crazy man in a mental institute. She thought she heard something about shock therapy, but told herself she was just hearing things.
Donovan looked past the doctor and saw Olga standing by the doorframe. He motioned with a tilt of his head for her to come over, and she complied. Dr. O’Neill looked up as she came to a stop beside him, and they nodded at each other.
"You heard?"
"Yes, Dr. O’Neill." She managed to choke out. "Please let us know if anything changes."
The tall man nodded, and excused himself as his pager went off, signaling that he was needed elsewhere. Donovan looked at Olga as she stared at the floor. She felt her eyes beginning to well up, and knew that if one tear fell, there would be no stopping the rest. In a second, Donovan wrapped his arms around her in a warm embrace. Startled only for a split second, Olga returned the hug tightly and let the tears flow freely as she cried on his shoulder.
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Part Four
When Olga opened her eyes, she was shocked to find that she had fallen asleep. Straightening herself, she saw that she was in the coffee room in a chair. Running a hand through her hair, she looked to her right and saw Donovan reading a magazine. She cleared her throat, and he looked up at the noise.
"Morning."
Stretching slightly in the uncomfortable chair, she squinted. "What time is it?"
Donovan checked his watch and replied, "about 11:45." Startled, Olga sat up straighter.
"I slept that long?"
"Don’t worry, you didn’t miss anything." His voice had a hint of sadness to it, and Olga sighed. She looked at Donovan for a moment.
"Did you sleep at all?" she asked him, noticing that small circles were beginning to form under his eyes.
"Yeah, I slept a while last night. Dr. O’Neill said that he’s doing a lot better. He hasn’t had an episode in over 8 hours." He paused, trying to read Olga’s reaction. "It’s a good sign."
She simply nodded again. "But he’s still not going to released." Donovan’s head dropped.
"No, not yet." He mumbled, almost to himself. Craig cleared his throat, and as Olga looked at him, she had a feeling he was about to give her some bad news. She was right.
"Talmadge called. He wants us back at NNL."
Olga’s eyebrows shot up. "What?"
Donovan shrugged. "It might be for the best. We’re not doing anything here. Plus, we should get back and make sure that things are ready when Frank does come back." Olga knew that Donovan was having the same hard time she was having with the whole situation, but he was a lot better at not letting it show.
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Before they left Hansen Island, Donovan and Olga made one last visit to Parker. The straight jacket had been taken off, but he was still in isolation, only this room was bigger, and had a window facing the courtyard. When Donovan and Olga walked in, Frank was at the window, staring out with a far away look on his face. When the large door clicked closed, Parker turned around and smiled at them.
"I guess you two are heading back to NNL, huh?"
"Yeah Frank. Talmadge wants us back." Donovan felt bad about leaving, but it was even worse having Parker call him on it. A strange silence filled the room. Olga looked at Frank.
"Sorry we have to go so soon. I wish we could stay."
"Hey, Its okay. Thank you guys for coming in the first place. It means a lot."
"No problem buddy." Donovan walked up to his friend and the two embraced briefly. "You take care of yourself okay?"
"Always do." Parker smiled. Olga walked up to him and told herself she was just going to shake his hand, but she found herself giving him a tight embrace.
"We’ll try to come back." She said as she pulled away.
Parker nodded. "I’ll be fine." Olga was unsure if it was his two visitors Parker was trying to convince, or himself. As they walked out of the door, and it closed and locked behind them, Olga and Donovan both paused, feeling that they should stay, but both knowing that they couldn’t. As they walked out of the hollowed halls and out into the late afternoon sunlight, Olga felt a rush of emotion, telling her that Frank was right. He would be okay.
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Six Days Later…
Olga wasn’t sure, but she was almost positive that she was losing her mind. Since she and Captain Donovan had returned from Hansen Island, activity had been running out of control at NNL. People had heard about Parker and were trying everything they could think of to take their minds off the whole situation. That involved keeping busy, and they were all doing a great job of it.
Dr. O’Neill had called Olga everyday and kept her up to date on Frank’s progress, and to her great disappointment, there wasn’t much. It wasn’t until Olga was on her last shred of hope that she got the news she had been waiting for. Dr. O’Neill had uncovered the fact that he believed caused Parker’s relapse. When the phone rang just as Olga was going to lunch, she picked it up in a hurry, planning to tell whomever it was to call back later. Lunch was the only thing that was on her mind at that moment. Until of course she heard the doctors voice on the other end. Suddenly lunch was forgotten as she sat back down in her chair.
As she listened, a flood of mixed emotions raged through her. Dr. O’Neill sounded so sure that Frank would be okay. Still, it would take more time. As he explained it, and from what she could understand over the loud pounding of her heart, the doctor believed the regression was related to Parker’s time as a prisoner in Somalia. Parker had begun to talk when he was hostile, and had mentioned something about being a prisoner. Dr. O'Neill explained that more had been done to Parker than originally thought. He had repressed the memories though, because they were so damaging. He had shoved them into the darkest corner of his mind because he knew he had to focus on getting out. However, once he completely lost his mind, the memories had been kept in the dark, with Frank forgetting to dredge them up and deal with them as he had the others.
Dr. O’Neill went on to say that anything related to torture could have made him recall his ordeal, making the images rage back to the front of his mind at a damaging rate. When that happened, Parker had been so disoriented that he thought he was still in captivity, and would explain why he had attacked people. Olga thought back and remembered a televison special that Olga and Dr. Ballard had been watching about POW's. Frank had walked in and saw a brief section when they described some of the old methods used on prisoners.
Olga mind wrapped itself around what the doctor was telling her, but stopped suddenly.
"Dr. O’Neill, if that is the case, and Mr. Parker thought that he was in danger, why would he be hostile towards me, then walk away, no longer trying to get away?" Olga wanted desperately to believe that this was the reason, but wanted to have the doctor explain everything so that she knew for sure and had no doubts.
"Dr. Vukovitch, In that situation, Mr. Parker was just coming out of one his blackouts. Its possible that the only thing he knew at that moment was that he was being threatened by words, not actions. In that case, the best course of action for him would be to assault in the same matter."
Olga nodded slowly, trying to comprehend if the explanation made any sense. Satisfied, she sighed. "So what now?"
"Well, now that we know how to treat Mr. Parker, his chances of recovery not only improve, but their rate will also quicken. At the time, my best estimate will be that he can be released, barring any unforeseen complications, within the next six months."
Even though Olga was surprised it would take so long, she knew deep down that it would take quite a while. Thanking the doctor when he told her he would continue to keep her updated, she hung up the phone and sat still. Still his words echoed in her mind. More was done to him than originally thought
That explained the times when he was unresponsive and hostile. Standard behavior, so she had been told, for someone that was being held prisoner. Parker thought he was back in Somalia and was going to be tortured. Olga felt a tear fall down her cheek. This time, it was not a tear of sadness, it was borne of pity.
Wiping the trail off of her cheek, she stood and walked off to tell the bittersweet news to Donovan, Talmadge, and the rest.
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The months passed by slowly, but it was towards the end of the fourth month that time seemed to stand still. She had talked to Dr. O’Neill every week, and every time she spoke with him, the doctor gave her more reason to be hopeful. He told her in no uncertain terms that the speed of Parker’s recovery was amazing. It had been almost a month since his last ‘episode’, and that filled her with an intense sense of happiness. Talmadge and the doctor had many long conversations, and it was decided that if Parker did return to ‘work’, it would only be desk duty for a while. Olga found it somewhat humorous that Dr. O’Neill had no idea what kind of work Parker did. If he did know, she wasn’t sure how he’d react.
Olga had been to Hansen Island only a couple of times since the first visit. Donovan had gone back more often than she had, and whenever he returned, he seemed as excited about Parker’s return as she did. Everyone at NNL was happy that things were going to be back to normal soon, whatever that was with Backstep. Even the few workers that didn’t care so much for Frank admitted that things had been too quiet with him gone.
It was Ramsey that worried her. He had kept quiet about Parker’s return, and whenever it was mentioned, he would get quiet, and sometimes even leave the room. Olga knew that it had to be hard on him. She had cornered him once and asked him if he would be all right, and he had said that he would be. Upon further explanation, Ramsey told her that he was just a little nervous, a great feat for Ramsey to admit. Not that she blamed him. If Frank Parker attacked her, she wouldn’t be able to face him again.
After many sleepless nights, and even more restless dream filled ones, it was finally the week. Frank Parker was coming back. Olga knew that he wouldn’t be allowed to do anything more than paperwork for a few weeks. She didn’t care. As weird as it sounded, what she was looking forward to the most was being able to walk past his office, or the gym, and see him. For too long it had been someone else in the gym. For too long there had been no one in his office. For too long things had been all wrong. That was all about to change though, and the anticipation almost made Olga want to scream. It was taking too long.
Olga was at her desk rearranging some papers and shuffling them into piles when she heard a knock on her door. Looking up, she was greeted with the smiling face of Frank Parker. Her jaw dropped open as she let it sink in that he was back.
"What are you… you’re early!" Olga jumped out of her chair, and crossed the short distance between her desk and Parker. As she did, Frank smirked.
"You miss me?" he was rewarded with a tight hug, which he returned gratefully.
"Everyone did." She said, regrettably pulling herself away. "I’m so glad you’re back! How do you feel?"
"Good, I never thought I’d miss this place."
Olga smiled again. "I can’t believe you’re back!" The whole thing seemed unreal. She should have known that he would not come when he was supposed. He no doubt knew that people had arranged a surprise party for him, and since Parker hated those things, it was just like him to bypass them.
"I’m still stuck behind my desk though. Doesn’t mean I’m gonna be of much use." Parker shrugged, trying to act casual, but Olga could see in his eyes that he was ecstatic to be out of Hansen Island.
"Of course you’ll be useful. Who else is going to talk-back to Ramsey?" As soon as the words were out of her mouth, Olga regretted brining up Ramsey. Parker’s smile faltered.
"That reminds me, I need to talk to him. You know where he is?"
"Uh, his office I think." Olga said quietly, still mentally kicking herself.
"Tell you what, I’m going to go talk to him, then will you have lunch with me?" Parker raised an eyebrow waiting for his answer. He didn’t have to wait long.
"I’d love to."
"Great. I’ll be back in about an hour. You try and stay out of trouble while I’m gone." With a smile, Parker walked away down the hall and disappeared around a corner. Olga closed the door to her office and leaned against it. She closed her eyes and sighed.
It felt good to be happy again.
=30=