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Barney knew there would be trouble the instant his Tang at breakfast didn’t mix right. When he almost fell into the office, while tripping over their resident vagrant he knew it was going to be a long day and headed straight for the coffee maker. As usual it looked awful, but he drank it anyway. “Morning” he raised his mug to Harris, Dietrich, Yamana and Wojo. They grumbled back in return. Lord how he hated Mondays.

As Barney suspected the day got worse with the arrival of Inspector Scanlon. In his hands, he was twisting a magazine a sure sign he was going to be on about something. He walked nervously around Harris’ desk.

Harris scratched his neck idly. “Hmmphf. Afraid you’re going to catch some fashion sense?”

Barney scolded Harris with eyes and words and dragged the Inspector into the office. As he did so, he made sure to catch Yamana’s eye ,” Make the Inspector some coffee would you?” An evil grin spread across his face, his dark Asian eyes glinting with repressed glee. “SURE THING!” he sang cheerfully.

“Serves him right,” Harris commented as the door close.

“Hey,” Dietrich said leaning over his desk. “Can you catch fashion sense?”

“You can catch something later baby,” Harris winked. “Now get your cute little behind off my desk.”


Barney sat down and drank more of his coffee, grateful it wasn’t the death drink that Yamana was making right now. “What’s this all about Inspector?”

Scanlon paced as he shook his well-wrung magazine in Barney’s face. “You have THEM in the office Barney. You need to get rid of THEM!” He hissed, his eyes flashing eagerly.

Barney sat back and cleared his throat. “Who is THEM?”

“You know Barney there’s US and THEM. We’re the good God Fearing men who fight for our country and get married, have kids and then there’s THEM.”

Shooting to his feet Barney gripped the sides of the desk tightly. “No, you’re wrong Inspector there’s US and there’s YOU! Get out of my office right now!”

Yamana stumbled into the room with the mug of coffee, leaving the door open behind him. “Here you go Inspector.”

“He’s NOT staying!” Barney declared with anger lacing his voice as his voice grew in volume. “ARE YOU?” This drew the attention of all in the outer office, who had frankly been eavesdropping for the whole conversation anyway.

The Inspector shook his head. “I thought you were the GOOD KIND, but instead you’re one of them.”

“He is the GOOD KIND!” Harris yelled angrily, his hands on his hips.

“Yes,” Dietrich agreed standing by his side. “And I believe there are laws against discrimination in this country that protects us from this. Or shall I call my friends down at the Civil Liberties office?”

“Yeah! What he said!” Wojo went to stand by his friends. Barney smiled with pride at his men. Yamana went to stand beside them too then blushed. “I’m not one but if being friends with one…well, what they said.” He rolled his eyes, shot a thumb over his shoulder and crossed his arms over his chest.

Barney walked over to the door and held it wide. “Good day Inspector.” They slammed the door behind them. After a bit of back slapping the office settled back into work and Barney watched them with admiration. He ignored the bit of hand holding that went on immediately after the door had closed. “Do you really have a friend down at the Civil Liberties office?” he asked Dietrich after he sat back down.

Dietrich pushed up his glasses and laughed turning to smile at Harris, who Barney noticed was looking rather smitten in return. He looked back at Barney for a moment before answering, as was his way. “I don’t need one when I’ve got friends right here.” Harris stood up with a smile, grabbed Dietrich by the tie and hauled him around the desk, much to everyone’s amusement. “Be back in ten Barney.” They headed quickly down the hall, grinning madly.

Barney patted Dietrichs desk with a smile and headed to his back office. He turned in the door jamb his eyebrows shooting up to his hairline. “And someone throw out that coffee and make a new batch!”

“Oh shit!” Yamana cried and threw the rest into the already wilting plant and let someone else make another. Barney laughed and closed the door; maybe the day wasn’t so bad after all, if they’d always have each other.