The House Fan Fiction Archive

 

Guess Who's Sleeping in Your Bed


by Rennie51


"I'm being nice to you because of your current situation," Dr. House explained, attempting to sound sincere as he bounced his small rubber ball against the floor. He watched as it ricocheted off the wall and landed gracefully in the palm of his right hand. Smiling, he leaned back in his chair, propping his legs onto his desk one at a time. His friend and colleague, Dr. James Wilson, sat slouched in his chair staring idly at the ceiling.

The young doctor lifted his head and looked doubtfully towards the other doctor. "My situation?"

"Yep." House threw the ball against the floor again, taking delight in watching it thump against the adjacent surfaces before settling neatly into his hand.

"My situation as in having to listen to your constant egotistical, self-serving arguments?" Wilson asked as he dropped his head onto the back of the chair again.

House smirked, losing interest in his rubber ball and reaching across his desk to grab his oversized tennis ball, tossing it into the air. "Admit it, Wilson, you can't get enough of me."

The oncologist sighed as he rubbed the back of his neck. "So true. Yet so sad."

House caught the ball and placed it back onto his desk. "The situation I'm referring to is the one where you've found yourself recently divorced and very lonely. Not to mention very lonely."

"Not that you're being obvious or anything, but I'm not lonely." Wilson shifted in his chair, placing his elbow on the armrest and resting his chin on his hand. He wasn't sure he wanted to have this conversation.

House looked at his friend sympathetically. "Trust me, you're lonely."

"You don't have to throw yourself off the roof. I'm not that lonely." He sat up and reached unsuccessfully for the small rubber ball resting on the desk. House got to it sooner snatching it up and holding it just out of the other man's grasp.

"Of course you're not. You always have me." The scruffy doctor fluttered his eyelashes suggestively.

Wilson smiled in spite of himself. "Getting a divorce was one of the smartest things I've ever done."

"If only to make up for one of the stupidest things you've ever done, namely getting yourself hitched for a third time," House said, using his hand to lift his right leg off his desk quickly followed by his left. He repositioned himself in his chair, sitting upright and swiveling to face Wilson. "Of course there was also the time Julie almost caught you in your office with that blonde....."

"That's one of the qualities I admire most about you, House," the young doctor interrupted. "You have the uncanny ability to effectively kick a friend when he's down." He shook his head and smiled sadly.

"Why, thank you. It's a gift." House studied his friend. "I have some business acquaintances who can help, you know."

Wilson's head rolled in House's direction. "Business acquaintances?"

The other doctor nodded as he picked up his oversized tennis ball again and began tossing it from hand to hand.

Wilson sat upright. "Hookers."

"You say it like it's a bad thing." House scratched his chin with the tennis ball.

"I don't need prostitutes, House. I'm doing fine in that department."

"Yes, I've noticed how you've been favoring your left hand lately." House peered over his desk trying to get a better look at the other doctor. "You need to give it a rest or it may fall off."

"I assume you're referring to my hand."

"What else?"

Wilson sighed. "Just because I'm not married anymore doesn't mean I'm not getting any," the young doctor protested.

"But for someone who's used to double entry bookkeeping, this semi-dry spell must be so gosh darned difficult." House leaned over his desk and whispered, "So, who is she?"

Wilson ducked his head down to House's level and smiled. "You really think I'm going to tell you?" he whispered back.

House sat up in annoyance. "Why not? You'll probably be announcing your engagement in three months."

The oncologist held up his hand. "No way! I'm through with marriage."

"Of course you are," House said, mocking agreement. "I can understand a man getting married three times, but four? What idiot would do that?" He squinted his eyes. "Who did you say she was again?"

"I didn't." Wilson began to stand, hoping the other doctor would get the message and end the conversation.

"Should I take that to mean it's a guy? Not quite what I was expecting, but...."

Wilson fell back into his chair. "It's not a guy!"

"Transsexual?"

"No!"

"Hermaphrodite?"

"House!"

House held up his hand in surrender. "Okay, okay!" He thought for a moment. "My educated guess is that it's the lovely Ms. Debbie in Accounting."

Wilson was intrigued despite his current level of annoyance. "Why do you say that?"

"Well, mainly because you've been ignoring her lately." House surveyed his desk searching for another toy to play with. His eyes fell onto his yo-yo. Smiling, he snatched it off his desk, pushed his chair back and began playing with it.

Wilson folded his arms across his chest. "So...since I'm ignoring her, I'm sleeping with her."

House caught the yo-yo as his head snapped up. "You are? Why Dr. Wilson!"

"I'm not sleeping with Debbie. I've learned the hard way that having a relationship with someone you work with is not the smartest thing to do. That will never happen again."

House clutched the yo-yo to his chest. "Why don't you just plunge a knife into my heart?"

"You'll get over it."

"Over what?"

Wilson stood again and placed his hands on his hips. "You may as well give up now, I'm not going to tell you."

"But you tell me everything," House protested as he peered up at his friend.

"Just like you tell me everything." Wilson picked up the tennis ball and tossed it into the air a few times.

"No, not like that at all." House scowled at the other doctor. "If you don't tell me I won't let you play with my toys."

Wilson smiled as he caught the ball and tossed it over the desk to his friend. "How about some dinner?"

Barely catching the ball, House waved it menacingly in the air. "You're trying to change the subject."

"No, I'm trying to get some dinner. I'm hungry."

"Okay, how about this. If I promise to buy you a steak, will you tell me then?" House asked, reaching to the side of his desk to retrieve his cane.

Wilson cocked his head, scrunching up his forehead in thought. "Mmm....with grilled onions and a baked potato?"

"The works," House said, smiling as he waited for his reward.

"I don't think so," Wilson decided, looking directly into his friend's blue eyes.

House fell back into his chair defeated. "Fine, but this isn't over. You'll talk," he warned, trying to sound intimidating.

Wilson scratched his head lightly, seemingly contemplating what House had just said. He remained silent.

The older doctor smiled threateningly. "So you're afraid of me, are you?"

"I'm more afraid of that stick of yours," Wilson said as he pointed to the cane now in House's possession.

The scruffy doctor held the cane up into the air. "And rightfully so."

Both men were quiet for a few moments, Wilson hoping his friend would lose interest in the conversation and House still determined to get his answer. House limped around to the side of his desk and sat down on the edge. "Okay, how about this...I'll guess and you tell me if I'm warm."

Wilson sighed. "I don't want to play games."

"Okay....then you guess and I'll tell you if you're warm."

At that moment Dr. Allison Cameron entered the conference room, her brow furrowed, totally unaware of the two men in the adjoining room. They turned their attention towards her, both noting that she carried a file and appeared to be deep in thought. Dropping the folder onto the table, she pulled out a chair and sat down, opened the file and began to read. The two doctors in the other room observed her intently through the glass wall as she studied the file, repeatedly twirling her hair and biting her lower lip. As he watched her, House noticed through his peripheral vision that Wilson was slowly sitting down into his chair. The older doctor glanced over towards his friend and was immediately intrigued by what he saw. The oncologist was staring fixedly at Dr. Cameron, his head tilted to one side. He was absentmindedly rubbing the side of his chin with one hand while drumming his fingers against the armrest with the other.

House grasped his cane and stood, hastily limping to the door of the conference room. Opening it, he leaned in. "Dr. Cameron, I need you for a consult."

The young woman was startled at the sound of her boss's voice. She turned quickly and glanced towards Dr. Wilson who was watching her through the glass. "Yes, of course, I'll be right there." House nodded and returned to his office smiling sweetly in response to Wilson's scowl. Cameron closed the file she had been reading, pushed her chair out and got to her feet, following the older doctor into his office. As she entered the room, she briefly acknowledged Wilson and stood awkwardly waiting for House to speak.

"Dr. Cameron, "Wilson said in his most professional manner.

She gave him a small smile in response and turned her attention towards her boss. "You said you needed a consult?"

"Yes, yes I did." House glanced quickly towards Wilson as he spoke. Sitting down on the edge of his desk, he addressed his young protg. "I've been attempting to determine who Dr. Wilson has been sleeping with, but I'm afraid I haven't been successful. Usually, I'm pretty good at these things, but due to Dr. Wilson's pigheadedness I'm just not getting it....unlike my colleague here who says he's getting it on a regular basis." He again looked over towards Wilson whose head was now buried in his hand. The older doctor smiled as he again addressed Cameron. "Your thoughts?"

He couldn't help but notice how flushed her face had become, obviously embarrassed as she cast her eyes towards the floor. After a moment, her head jerked back up and anger was conspicuously present on her face. "Dr. House," she snapped, "I would appreciate it if you wouldn't subject me to your childish games...."

"You may as well tell him about us, Allison. You know he'd find out sooner or later."

Two sets of eyes snapped in Wilson's direction, both sets open wide in astonishment. The oncologist quickly shifted his head between House and Cameron waiting for someone to speak. After several awkward moments one pair of eyes transformed from shock to amusement. The other pair was narrowing into something resembling rage.

"Good one, Dr. Wilson," House chirped.

"You two should grow up!" Cameron yelled as she angrily placed her hands on her hips.

"And Angelina Jolie should have sex with me but it's never gonna happen," House said with all seriousness.

Cameron shook her head, turned on her heel and walked out of the office. The two doctors watched as she snatched the file off the conference table and huffed out of the room, into the hall and out of sight.

Wilson sighed. "I'll apologize to her in the morning. You should do the same."

"Apologize for what? I simply asked her a question. You're the one who accused her of having sex with you." House limped back around his desk and slowly lowered himself into his chair.

Wilson threw his hands up in exasperation. "It was a joke!"

"Yeah, you tell her that."

"I said I'd apologize in the morning."

"Can I watch?" House asked, grabbing his bottle of Vicodin and swallowing two pills in one felled swoop.

"No."

House smiled as he tapped his fingers on his desk. "So, are you?"

"Am I what?" Wilson asked idly, contemplating what he would say to Allison in the morning.

"Doing the fair Dr. Cameron?" Wilson's thoughts snapped back to the present. He narrowed his eyes threateningly towards House.

"Okay, so you're not. But why were you staring at her like that?"

"Like what?"

"Like she was a popsicle and you wanted to lick her."

Wilson rolled his eyes. "Very nice, House. She's a beautiful woman."

"Fine." There was silence again in the room. "So are you going to tell me who it is?"

Wilson sighed yet again. "Okay, let's say I stoop to your level and give you a hint. What do I get out of it?"

House thought a moment. "I'll let you hold my yo-yo." He held up his cherished toy for Wilson's inspection.

Wilson eyed the yo-yo. "Just hold it?"

"Why Dr. Wilson, we haven't even been on a date yet."

"Tempting offer, but I don't think so."

"Okay, okay... I'll let you play with it." The older doctor twirled the toy around in his hand, showing off his prize.

"Are we still talking about the yo-yo?"

"We're talking about my yo-yo, my champion SuperYo Samurai. You do know what yo-yo spelled backwards is, don't you?"

Wilson furrowed his forehead in confusion. "Oy-Oy? What's that supposed to mean?"

"Nothing. I just like hearing you say it."

"That's it, I'm done. See you tomorrow." Wilson stood and quickly walked out of House's office, waving his hand as the door closed behind him.

The older doctor watched as the oncologist disappeared around the corner. "Touchy, aren't we?" he said smiling. He held up his yo-yo and looked at it admiringly. "Looks like it's just you and me tonight, kid." He slipped his finger through the loop and gracefully tossed his precious yo-yo out as far as it would go. Without missing a beat he drew it back in, curling his fingers around it as it slapped against the palm of his hand.

****************************************************

"Never expected to see you here tonight," House said as he leaned on the edge of the door. Wilson shoved his hands into his jacket pocket. "Yeah, surprised us both. Can I come in?"

House stepped back and opened the door wider, allowing his friend to enter. "To what do I owe the pleasure....."

"Pleasure?" The other doctor turned to face House as he removed his jacket.

"Don't get your hopes up, Doc. I was just being nice." House closed the door and limped past Wilson to reclaim his favorite chair facing the television. Resting his cane on the side, he leaned forward to pick up the remote from the coffee table and clicked off the TV. He sat back and eyed Wilson as he dropped down into his usual spot on the couch.

"What was that you were watching?" Wilson asked, squinting as he pointed to the screen.

"Oh, just some show about best friends confiding in each other...nothing you can relate to," House said sarcastically, blankly looking up at his colleague.

The oncologist rolled his eyes and crossed his arms in front of his chest. "You are obsessive."

"Just one of the many reasons you love me," House quipped as he suggestively toyed with his hair.

"Right. I'll add that to the list along with obnoxious, smug, rude, overbearing, offensive, misanthropic, irritating....

House jumped in. "Genius, handsome, tall, funny, hot... not to mention my big stick." He reached over and picked up his cane holding it up above his head.

"Ah yes, your big stick," Wilson agreed as he looked up at the cane. "And you holding it up like that makes me tremble all over."

House smiled. "Wanna touch it?" He lowered the cane and held it out towards Wilson.

"Not just yet... let's work up to it," Wilson said, as he rubbed the back of his neck.

"So, Doc, you keep any other lists I should be aware of? Like...what it is about me that turns you on? Or...my cutest outfit maybe? How about that sweet little number I wore yesterday?" House's eyes sparkled in the dimly lit room. Noting that an answer was obviously not forthcoming, he changed the subject. "How about a beer?"

Wilson crossed one leg over the other as he leaned back on the couch. "So, your plan is to ply me with alcohol."

"You got a problem with that?'

"No. Just checking."

Both men sat quietly watching the other, each silently attempting to ascertain his friend's thoughts. Finally, Wilson spoke. "So...."

"So....?"

"That beer?"

"You know where the kitchen is."

The young doctor shook his head. "If you're trying to seduce me, you're not doing a very good job," he said as he got to his feet.

"Who said anything about seducing you? I was hoping you'd wash my car."

Wilson laughed as he made his way to the kitchen. "You want one too?"

"Sure. I'm not up to my quota for the night anyway." House watched as his friend approached the kitchen, wondering why he was here. He figured he might as well take advantage of it.

Wilson returned with two beers in hand, giving one to House as he sank down into the couch. Both men twisted off the caps and began drinking.

"So, who is it?

The young oncologist swallowed quickly and leaned forward to place his beer onto the coffee table. "You are persistent."

"Make sure you add that to the list." House took another drink of his beer. "So, who is it?"

Wilson rolled his eyes. "You really think I'm going to tell you."

House's face became serious. "Isn't that why you're here?"

"Uh.... no," Wilson replied, somewhat unnerved at his colleague's suddenly sober countenance.

House cocked his head as his expression turned inquisitive. "Well, then why are you here?"

Wilson almost felt as if the other man was interrogating him. He decided it was his own paranoia and attempted to put it out of his mind. "Since when do I need a reason?"

"Since you decided you weren't going to tell me who you're sleeping with." House was smiling, but Wilson couldn't decide if he was serious or not.

He sighed. "Okay, House. If I tell you, can we change the subject?"

"Well, duh, what's a better topic to discuss than sex?" The older doctor lifted his beer to his mouth and finished it off.

Wilson tilted his head. "Oh, I don't know. How about art, literature, the current state of the world....."

"Boring." House placed his empty bottle onto the coffee table with a loud thump. "Come on, Wilson, what's said in this apartment stays in this apartment."

The young doctor cast his eyes towards the floor. After a moment he leaned forward, snatched the bottle off the table and took a long swallow. House watched impatiently as he drummed his fingers against his thigh. "So? Tell me already!"

Placing the bottle back onto the table, Wilson sheepishly raised his hand over his head while keeping his face turned away from House. He closed his eyes, waiting for the verbal assault he was certain would follow.

House's mouth fell open. "Your hand? You're dating your hand?"

Wilson dropped his arm to his side and looked reluctantly towards his friend. "Okay, House, I'm not seeing anyone. Now you know."

"And you couldn't tell me this? Why the big secret?" House asked with an edge to his voice. Before Wilson could respond, the older doctor continued talking. "So I was right."

"Not necessarily. Just because I'm not seeing anyone doesn't mean I'm lonely."

"No, I mean I was right about the other thing," he said. "You know, shaking hands with shorty.... charming the one-eyed python. Or how about ..."

"Or how about shutting up?" Wilson asked, sighing. "This is why I didn't want to tell you." He rubbed his eyebrow and looked down towards the floor.

"So, the babe magnet is going through a dry spell; big fucking deal. Jesus, Wilson, welcome to the real world." The young doctor's head snapped in House's direction, his eyes narrowed.

Unhappy with the direction the conversation was going, House wisely stopped talking. However, it didn't take long for him to realize something. Furrowing his brow questioningly, he spoke again. "You held up your right hand. You're a lefty."

Wilson shrugged. "Some things I like to do with my right hand...."

"Oooh, doc, you're turning me on. Ambidextrous are we?"

"I've told you enough already. I think I need another beer." Wilson stood and grabbed House's empty bottle off the table as he hurried towards the kitchen. He hadn't expected to tell his friend the details of his sex life... or lack thereof ... but he knew House wouldn't give him a moment's peace until he did. He just hoped he wouldn't end up regretting it....well, more than he did already.

As he reached into the refrigerator, he heard the other man call out to him. "Get me one too... and use your left hand." Wilson sighed. I'm an idiot, he thought to himself.

*******************************************************

House was tired of waiting. He sighed loudly as he snatched his cane from beside his chair, leaned into it and pulled himself to his feet. He quickly limped towards the kitchen almost expecting to find that Wilson had gone out the back door. Fine...more beer for me, he thought. As he rounded the corner into the kitchen he saw that he had been wrong, and actually found himself feeling relieved. Wilson was sitting at the kitchen table, two bottles of beer in front of him. One hand was clutching a bottle while the other supported his chin as he rested his elbow on the table. As House entered the room, Wilson didn't acknowledge his presence.

The older man didn't say anything as he slowly took a seat at the table directly across from his friend. He was willing to wait until Wilson broke the silence.

"I drank your beer," Wilson said quietly, his eyes studying the wood pattern on the kitchen table.

"I noticed. Good thing I had my stash of Vicodin, otherwise things could've gotten ugly."

Wilson looked at the other man. "You think I'm overreacting."

"It's that time of the month isn't it?" House asked sympathetically while contemplating whether he needed to get himself a beer from the refrigerator.

Wilson absentmindedly traced his finger in small circles along the rough surface of the table. "I've never been alone before."

House folded his arms across his chest. "So do something about it."

The oncologist sat up straight and rested his palms on the table. "I'm not sure I want to."

House furrowed his brow. "I haven't had that many beers." He looked at the other man questioningly. "Have I?"

Wilson chuckled. "Are you saying I'm not making any sense?"

"I'm not saying anything. What are you saying?" House asked, scratching the side of his head lightly.

"I'm not sure."

"I'm glad we had this talk."

House stood and limped towards the refrigerator without using his cane. Opening the door, he turned to face Wilson. "You want another one?"

Wilson looked at the two bottles in front of him. "Yes...no...uh.... No."

House took two bottles out of the refrigerator and returned to the table. As he slowly lowered himself into his chair, he slid one of the bottles across the table to his friend.

"Thanks," Wilson said quietly as he opened the bottle and took a drink.

"If it makes you feel any better, your hair looks good," House said as he took a long swig of beer.

Wilson laughed softly. "New shampoo."

House studied Wilson's hair. "Does it feel as soft as it looks?"

The young doctor's head snapped in House's direction. "You tell me."

"You want me to feel your hair?" he asked, surprised by the question. He slowly placed his bottle down onto the table as he eyed his friend across the table.

"Do you want to feel my hair?"

House shook his head quickly as if he were trying to clear it. "Tell me we're not having a conversation about feeling your hair."

Wilson sighed. "What about me touching your stick? Or holding your yo-yo? Do you really want me to do those things?"

"Are we speaking English? Because if we are I think I need a refresher course."

"So, when you say these things to me.... do you want me to give you a clever reply? Or ignore you? Or are you hoping that one day I'll read something into those suggestive comments of yours and actually do something?"

"What's gotten into you?" House asked, raising his hands up into a question.

"Nothing ,.... nothing's gotten into me. I guess I'm just at a point where I've learned some things about myself that I never wanted to face before." Wilson glanced across the table at his colleague in an attempt to read his expression. It wasn't difficult.

"Okay, first you wouldn't admit to me who you were sleeping... or, as it turns out, not sleeping with. And now you're telling me about your life epiphanies. What happened to you between the living room and the kitchen? Or is there something in this beer I should know about?"

Wilson rubbed the back of his neck as he thought about what he wanted to say and how he wanted to say it. He knew this was also difficult for House and realized he wasn't making it any easier for him. He looked up at his friend. "Why do you think I've had three unsuccessful marriages?"

"No fair. You didn't tell me we were playing twenty questions." House had a distinct edge to his voice. He sighed. "Do you really want me to answer that?"

"Yes."

"Alright. Your problem, my young Dr. Wilson, is that you're in love with the idea of falling in love. You need that feeling...that rush....in your life in order to be happy. It's such an overwhelming feeling for you that you end up charging into marriage only to find the rush fades and it fades quickly. And the only way to get it back is to find another woman to fall in love with and the vicious cycle starts all over again." House stopped talking and studied the other man as he waited for a response. He didn't have to wait long.

"That's a bunch of bullshit." Wilson laughed bitterly, his eyes cast down towards the table

House was taken aback. "I take it that means you don't agree."

Wilson looked across the table inspecting his friend. "What do you think of me?" he asked quietly.

House shifted his eyes back and forth as he attempted to figure out what was going on with his colleague.

"Please just answer the question."

"I think you're a brilliant, accomplished, compassionate doctor who's suddenly gone a little nuts....."

"Stop." Wilson held up his hand.

"What? Did I hurt your feelings or something?" House asked with more than a hint of sarcasm in his voice.

"That's not what I meant."

The older doctor scrunched up his face. "How do you play this game again?

"It's not a game, House."

"I was afraid of that."

"Can we please have a serious conversation?" Wilson was leaning forward in his chair, rubbing his forehead with such urgency House was sure it would leave a mark.

"I thought we were having a serious conversation."

The young doctor slowly shook his head as he pushed his chair back and began getting to his feet. "Wait... sit down." Wilson looked into his friend's eyes as he slowly sank back down into his chair. House cleared his throat. "Obviously, I like you," he said, his eyes now cast down towards the table.

Wilson was caught off guard by that admission. "How?" he asked, hoping to hear what he wanted to hear, but, in truth, knowing better.

House was not prepared to have this conversation and he resented being forced into it. He sighed. "I don't think I want to play this game anymore."

"Why? Because you may have to admit something about yourself that you don't want to?"

He glared at Wilson. "No, because I don't like playing games where I don't know the rules."

The young doctor nodded his head in understanding. "I guess I've been somewhat vague here."

"Somewhat?"

Wilson sat upright as he folded his arms in front of him. "Alright, here are the rules." He looked at House. "Just say what you mean."

"Okay...you start," House said, leaning back in his chair as if he were challenging the other man. Which, in fact, he was.

The young doctor took a deep breath and forced himself to look into House's eyes. "I have feelings for you."

House shifted in his chair, obviously uncomfortable but didn't look away. He knew what Wilson was saying to him. In fact, he had spent several nights alone in his apartment thinking about his relationship with Wilson, this screwed up friendship that somehow seemed to work for both of them. But things had been changing between them for a while now...he had felt it and he knew his friend did too. He just never expected to be talking about it. So he dealt with it the best way he could...with sarcasm.

"So... when I asked you if you wanted to touch my big stick... you really wanted to?"

Wilson smiled. "Are you talking about your cane?"

"Nope."

"Ah, your other big stick." The young doctor tilted his head as he studied his friend across the table, his dark eyes glowing in the dim light of the kitchen.

House snickered. "Yep, the one that makes me happy in ways my cane couldn't even imagine." He leaned back in his chair again. "Are you gay?" He was aware of the enormity of that question, but justified it in his head by telling himself that he was just playing by Wilson's rules.

Wilson was startled by the question. It took him a moment to answer. "I never thought of myself as gay before."

"Your epiphany?"

The young doctor nodded slowly. "Am I upsetting you?"

"Surprisingly, no." House thought a moment. "Well, actually, not surprisingly."

"Not surprisingly? And why is that?" Wilson asked, his eyes questioning.

"Because I do want to feel your hair."

*********************************************************

Even though Wilson realized what he had just heard, he wasn't quite sure what it meant. Peering into House's eyes, he squinted as he tried to determine if his friend was being sincere or merely playing with him. For the next few moments, the two friends sat quietly eyeing each other from across the table. Wilson knew they were very close to crossing a line that could alter their friendship forever.

"I assume you heard what I just said," House said, finally breaking the silence.

Wilson scratched his head slowly. "I heard you. But...I'm not sure I get it."

"So I'm not the only one having a problem with English tonight." House paused. "I said I wanted to feel your hair."

"You do," Wilson repeated, mainly for his own clarification.

"Yep. Not to mention some of your other Wilson goodies," House quipped, his eyebrows raised suggestively.

"My goodies?" The young doctor regarded his friend. "Where is this coming from?"

"I guess for you it seems to be coming from out there somewhere...the blue." House held his arm up as he pointed towards the window.

"I'd say that's pretty accurate."

The older doctor tilted his head to the side. "You really had no idea."

"None. Or are you joking?"

"I never joke about sex," House said, his face deadly serious.

"Right." Wilson wasn't in the mood for House's sarcasm. "Maybe we should continue this conversation another night," he said, pushing his chair out as he stood. He began removing the empty bottles. As he reached across the table, the other doctor grabbed his wrist. Wilson tried to pull his hand away, but House held him in a firm grip.

"You started this, Wilson. Now we're both going to finish it," House said with a cautionary tone, releasing Wilson's wrist. The young doctor placed his hands on his hips as he cast his eyes towards the floor. House was right about him starting this...but as far as finishing it...he had no idea how.

"Come sit by me," House said, his voice softer.

Wilson laughed hesitantly. "This is really weird," he said, tilting his head as he studied his friend, almost feeling as if he were seeing him for the first time.

House chuckled. "Weird doesn't cover it. Now get your ass over here," he said as he patted the chair next to him. Wilson shrugged and walked around the table towards the other man. As he approached, House pulled the chair out inviting him to sit. Wilson sank down into the seat, taking great care to keep his attention anywhere but in House's direction. He lightly drummed his fingers on the table waiting for something to happen. A moment later, he felt House's hand in his hair, gently running his fingers through the silky strands. It felt amazing. He smiled, his eyes concentrating on his own hands as he rested them on the table.

"Oooh, soft," House purred. "Really soft." He continued to glide his fingers through Wilson's hair. "You use baby shampoo?"

Wilson laughed as he turned to face his friend. "We make quite a pair."

"You think?" House's hands were still in Wilson's hair, which was now tousled and sticking out in all directions. The older doctor smiled at his friend's disheveled appearance. "The thing is," House said, "I have no idea what to do now."

"Well, what would you do if I were a woman?"

House tenderly smoothed Wilson's flyaway strands and leaned back in his chair. "Depends....what woman?"

Wilson rolled his eyes. "Jesus, House, I don't know, any woman."

"My Mother?"

"That's just creepy."

"Your Mother?"

"House!"

"Okay, okay. If you were a woman...let's see...." He held up his hands to illustrate his words. "I'd probably have one hand down her blouse while my other hand would be fondling her...."

"Never mind ...I don't want to know," Wilson said as he turned his face away.

The other doctor was amused by his friend's display of jealousy. "Are you sure? It might help with the mood."

Wilson shifted his eyes towards House. "At this point I'm not sure of anything." He looked steadily into the other man's blue eyes. "So, Greg... are you gay?"

"Well, Jimmy, I like to think of myself as very appreciative."

Wilson frowned. "Meaning what exactly?"

"Meaning, I can appreciate your adorable ass while also appreciating the lovely Dr. Cameron's at the same time. And then there's always Chase...." He grinned. "It's so much fun being me."

The young doctor's heart sank. "So...this is only physical for you."

"I didn't say that."

"It must be the beer," Wilson said, shaking his head quickly attempting to clear his mind. "What are you saying exactly? And speak slowly."

House made a point of lowering his head to Wilson's level and looked directly into his eyes. "I. Like. You."

"Yes, House, I got that already."

"No. I. Really. Like. You. Are you understanding me now?"

The young doctor sat up. "You're saying you like me."

"How are you with sign language?"

Wilson scrunched up his face. "Just tell me what you're getting at."

House sighed. He leaned forward and grasped Wilson's shirt, pulling him close as he lightly pressed his lips against the young doctor's.

Wilson hesitated, totally caught off guard by House's actions. But it didn't take long for his entire body to react instinctively, leaning into his best friend as the kiss steadily grew more intense. After a few moments, House released his grip and they slowly parted.

Wilson cast his eyes towards the floor and remained silent as he recovered from the unexpected encounter.

House frowned. "You no like?"

"No, I like...I like a lot." Wilson sighed. "But now I've just given you a reason to gloat," the young doctor said as he turned his attention back towards House.

"When have you ever known me to gloat?"

Wilson rolled his eyes. His expression turned serious. "It was better than I imagined...and I did imagine," he said as he stared into his friend's eyes. He smiled. "What about you?"

House tilted his head. "Well...just to be sure, I feel the need to retest." He leaned into Wilson until their lips touched, reaching his arm around his back and gently pulling him closer. The young doctor responded enthusiastically, completely drawn to his friend, closing his eyes and savoring the feeling of being enveloped by the one person he trusted and cared for most in the world. He had envisioned what it would be like to be touched by House, but the reality far surpassed his imagination. They reluctantly separated.

"Sweet." House quipped.

Wilson thought about what he and House had just done....they kissed each other....twice. He shook his head slowly. "This is nuts."

House nodded. "The world is a nutty place."

"Are we making a mistake?" Wilson wanted to pull the words back the moment they escaped his mouth. As far as he was concerned, this was no mistake.

House leisurely leaned back in his chair. "Haven't a clue."

"You have no clue. You're the genius."

"You're the babe magnet."

Wilson raised an eyebrow. "This is true." He cocked his head, scrutinizing House from head to toe. "You do have this cutesy curmudgeonly thing happening, but I wouldn't exactly call you a babe."

House scowled. "I have feelings too you know."

The young doctor smiled but said nothing. He thought about the evening's unexpected turn of events. Truth be told, he felt good...exceptionally good. He glanced over towards House who was watching him intently. Seeing the affection reflected in his friend's eyes made him feel hopeful for the first time in months.

The sound of House's voice jolted him out of his reverie. "What's life without risks?" he was saying as he tossed a coin into the air. "Heads!"

House caught the coin and slapped it onto the kitchen table. As he slowly lifted his hand he peeked under his palm and smiled. "Heads it is... the gods have spoken."

"And what if it had been tails?" Wilson asked.

House held up the coin turning it over in his hand allowing his friend to get a better look. "Double sided coin... no chance of losing."

Wilson smiled. "Figures. So...I guess you can say this is a win-win situation." As he spoke, his stomach began growling...loudly, attracting House's attention. The older doctor looked at his friend's stomach, his eyebrows raised. "Do you have a puppy in there?"

"I'm starving," Wilson said, his face scrunched into a frown. "Haven't eaten since breakfast. Buy me a steak."

House snickered. "Giving orders already? So if I buy you dinner, what's in it for me?" he asked as he reached up to brush a strand of hair from the young doctor's forehead.

Wilson furrowed his forehead in thought. "Well.... if you're nice, I may let you have your way with me."

House shifted his eyes up towards the ceiling and contemplated the offer. "Hmm..." He looked at Wilson. "And then you'll wash my car?"

The young doctor smirked as he pushed his chair back and stood, handing House his cane. "I can do that," he said. "But what's in it for me?"

House placed his arm around Wilson's shoulder as they walked out of the kitchen. "Jimmy, my friend, this is the beginning of a beautiful relationship."

End.


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Legal Disclaimer: The authors published here make no claims on the ownership of Dr. Gregory House and the other fictional residents of Princeton-Plainsboro Teaching Hospital. Like the television show House (and quite possibly Dr. Wilson's pocket protector), they are the property of Fox Television, David Shore and undoubtedly other individuals of whom I am only peripherally aware. The fan fiction authors published here receive no monetary benefit from their work and intend no copyright infringement nor slight to the actual owners. We love the characters and we love the show, otherwise we wouldn't be here.