The BLTS Archive - Naomi
first in the Aide Memorie series
by R. Schultz (cousindream@aol.com)

---

Disclaimer: All things Trek belong to Paramount and ViaBorgCom, and I
am not making any money off this story, which is mine under Berne
Copyright Laws. Originally July 2002, 16,600 words.

Note: This story was written for the Captain's Fuhq Fest, but as that
group is now defunct, I'm posting it to the FFF.

Warning: This story contains graphic descriptions of female/female
love and sex. As a matter of fact, its a lesbian romance, and I feel
it could be included in the slick lez magazines but for the fact of my
gender. If lesbian sex makes your Jefferies tubes malfunction, why not
read something else? Furthermore. if you are underage, or live in a
country or locale that says TrekSmut is Verboten, you may not legally
enter here. Go elsewhere. Read a Nancy Drew Mystery or President
Bush's Economic Forecasts or some other escapist fiction. Go away.

Archiving: This story is now for the FFF, and then to the ASCEML.
Others may archive, but I hope you'll notify.

---

By the prescience of dogs, Jake was already in the flitter, waiting
for me to join him. I checked the batteries, and accepted the Net
control for the trip to the S-O grid.

One last personal check in the outside mirror. Too much me,
definitely. My ears looked like a fungus and my jowls shook when I
nodded. No woman should be forced to face eighty-five alone. I
carefully did not think about the four or five occasional lovers who
would be glad to hitch up with the old battle-ax. Wrinkles and wattles
and drooping chin and all.

Too much bosom showing, but they were my best feature these days. I
really should schedule the beginning of my surgery, and finish the
anti-aging shots.

I didn't have the enthusiasm for it right now. Next week. Next month.
Next year. I was still healthy as a horse, so there was no hurry.

I wore gray with metallic yellow trim, and my suit dress looked good,
cool and stylish. And it didn't make me look TOO plump. Jake didn't
care what I wore, if anything. No make-up. My Bajoran earring went on.
I'd earned it, marrying my ridge-nosed darling. I deliberately did not
look up into the sky. Petraka was gone, and that was it. Fini. Move
on.

Jake was barking. He knew I was dawdling. I smiled to think I should
find a bitch for his great-grandfather's cryo-sperm. I'd like a new
puppy in my house, and this Jake would probably delight in the new
puppy. All my Jakes made good fathers. Check the Comp tonight for a
good PKC bitch.

I tagged in, the safeties went on, the Net took me up, and sent me
towards the Lake Michigan field. Jake was so happy. He knew this time
in the flitter was a time when he could receive my almost undivided
attention. He adored me and that felt good. We had time and we both
napped as we traversed farmland and forest and a few prairies. The
Comp buzzed us awake when we neared the Sub-Orbital landing grid.

Off to the west I could see the sweep of the Wisconsin forest
preserve, and to the east the Michigan growths. A dozen catamarans
slid across the blue lake, watching the S-O plummet down from out of
space into the cold of the lake waters.

Two of those passengers from Argentina were very old friends indeed.
Sam Wildman had journeyed from her biological studies in the Chaco,
and sweet tall Naomi Wildman was with her. She would bring me a whiff
of Starfleet when we met. I didn't miss riding a desk, but I missed
walking the corridors of my ship. Any ship.

This Jake had never met her, but I remembered well the week several of
us had come together to celebrate Naomi's post-graduation vacation
together. Neelix and his striking half-Romulan wife, me with my
Petraka when he had the wild beard, and especially Naomi and B'Elanna.

Such lovely daughters Torres had, so wondrous young and vital B'Elanna
still looked. It was high Summer in Kamchatka, and there were numerous
tiny lakes and streams. Torres was such a show off. Three daughters
and she could run for kilometers and bench two hundred kilos, and she
had proved it.

One of my happiest memories were of us gals skinny-dipping in one of
the lakes, flab and all. A good Holo of Naomi in her new Ensign's
uniform sat on my mantel. A good Holo of a proud naked B'Elanna sat
next to it. A naked Nicoletti showing a not-too-large belly for her
first boy. Neelix's Tollis standing on her hands before falling into
the lake. My mantel had more than a few naked women on it, glorious in
threederHolos. I was proud of the collection of Holo's on display. As
well as the exquisite nude self-portrait of Phoebe in red that hung on
my east wall. And my younger body enshrined in a simple charcoal nude
study on the opposite wall. My nudity up there for all to gawk at, as
well as my comrades. Center front on the mantel was Annika's Holo.

Proud Annika wearing wet hair and damn all else.

So beautiful her, and B'Elanna. That weekend would be enshrined on my
mantel for so long as I loved. Lived.

I yearned for an excuse to go see Annika again. But she was beyond
Loyal Son and Father's Strong Arm, the ever-warring Harmony worlds,
out in the Beta Tau Ceti's.

Annika was one girl who never hesitated to put herself in Harm's Way.

The Stars were in all our blood, we who went out there. Always would
be, until we died.

Beverly, on a visit, had offered to pose for me naked. She said she'd
be proud to join my Holo collection of feminine beauty. I was rather
leery about having a naked Doctor Crusher in my abode. But then she'd
never made any secret of her other agenda of bedding my flabby body,
so why worry?

The Traffic Net slid me into a slip, and I found myself anticipating
meeting Sam and Naomi with more enthusiasm than I had this morning.
Jake whined at being left in the flitter. I turned on the cool for
him.

As soon as I hit paused in the middle of the concourse, a strong pair
of arms grabbed me from behind, spun me around, and gave me a
lung-squeezing kiss. Confused, surprised, I smiled inside to recognize
Naomi's small forehead horns and her perfect eyes. Then an older
figure had me tight and Sam was greeting me more heartily than I
expected. These two women were more physical than I ever was.

It felt good to be amongst friends. Jake thought he'd died and gone to
dog heaven when Naomi let him wallow all over her and get his belly
scratched. Now to home. Sam was holding my hand as we flew back,
telling me about the Matto Grasso and the Chaco stations, and the
amazing comeback of the jungle Native Indians.

I told her about the permanent camp center the Miami and Delaware
tribes had built on the Wabash, at Tippecanoe.

---

I had the home grid up, so we could live with the few biting bugs that
still came through the screen. Sam was talking non-stop, relishing
someone intelligent who she didn't see every day. Someone she could
tell about the world under the triple-canopy rain-forest and the grass
plains. She loved the wildness, so different from the manicured
miniature biosphere aboard VOYAGER.

Sam unwound enough to have a second Sangria with me. She talked of her
visit to Ganymede to study the creeping lichens there, and her
vacation to the sunken city of Tokio and Yokohama. From me she got the
few details I knew, of what had happened to Petraka. He was just gone,
out there in the Big Dark of the stars.

They that go down to the sea in ships.

Now I'll never know if we could have made a go of it.

Jake was back from the river first, and he happily gave us a good
shake-out of water he'd saved for the two of us. After a while Naomi
came into view, her robe over one arm, still palming water out of her
close-cropped hair.

She was breathtaking. The pride fairly glowed in Sam's smiling face.
Was I ever so lovely when I was young? Never! I felt every gram of my
flab at that moment, gazing at her young wet nude body. It's
impossible that I missed her beauty during that week in Kamchatka.
Maybe she was still little Naomi to me then.

She had a proud teen-ager's breasts, and a flat belly, and she moved
with the ease of a sculpted goddess. Suddenly I wished another
Hologram of a nude super being on my mantle. Another something of
transcendent beauty to outlive me.

What the hell, maybe I'll get one of Beverly too. Get one of her
rising out of the river. That'd be nice. A red-headed Venus in early
middle-age. Half her age she looked, and I'd seen her nude many times,
when she visited my river.

Naomi's eyes were glowing jewels in the last light of day, her lips
and face rich with health and youth. Like B'Elanna before her, her
head additions, her horns, made her more exotic and splendid, erotic
and sensual rather than detracting from her beauty. Sam and I held
hands tight as Naomi returned our gazes.

She came a dozen steps closer to us, just a little bit arrogant in her
youth and beauty. She looked directly at me, challenging me to look
away, her hands on her hips. Two more steps and we would touch.

Her eyes! Such eyes! Gone from soft blue child's guileless orbs to
blue with gun-metal in them. Her eyebrows darker now, accenting her
face into a compelling woman. Her hair was cut close to her skull,
still honey-blond, still looking soft as a lover's caress. I wished
she'd kept her long hair. I loved to twine my fingers in her curls
when she relaxed in my lap as a child.

Neelix would burst in pride at the result he had some hand in
creating. I remembered my Official Aide Memorie, my Captain's
Assistant, gently kneading my breasts as she nodded off to sleep in my
lap.

Naomi walked to my side. If I wanted to, I could touch the fluffy dark
forest of her pubic hair, the line of hip and thigh. She turned
around, arms out, smiling at me, flaunting her soft woman's rear,
teasing me. More than a touch of arrogance after all.

The body of a muscular teenager. I felt a hundred and eighty-five, not
eighty-five. She must be thirty-five, mustn't she?

"Do I pass your physical, Doctor Janeway?"

I blushed deeply, pretending they couldn't tell in the dusk.

My voice was even, no cracking as I commented on her display. Turning
to Sam I said; "She must have every male in Starfleet knocking on her
door, and not a few of the ladies as well!

"Naomi has grown into quite the woman, Sam, you must be proud of her
beyond easy telling. How many dozen Holo's do you have cluttering your
work area, out there in the Chaco? Five dozen?"

"Ten," she laughed. There was a wry tilt to that smile, though.
Something I'd said amused her.

"Naomi," I began, "Could you hold it right there while I go get my
threeder camera? I've got to get a Holo of you for my mantel, I
absolutely must!"

"Tomorrow will be soon enough," Naomi replied. "Why don't you join me
on a walk and swim tomorrow? You too, Mama. Jake can take candids of
all three of us in the buff." It felt loose and good again, amongst
the three of us. We made a promise to splash in my little river.

Naomi put on her robe, smiling at me all the while, then sat with us.
Jake went off after some varmint, maybe an imaginary one. He'd enjoy
the next generation of Irish Setters at Manse Janeway. I've also got
to get him shorn of his hair, too. He's already uncomfortable in his
winter's fur coat.

Naomi held my hand on my other side, her knuckle tracing my veins. "I
met your neighbor," she said. Not saying so but probably meeting
Beverly while she was naked. Bev must have enjoyed that view.

"She has a lovely Wolf with her, that's what it is, isn't it? Do you
know her very well?"

"The mostly-wolf is Tatiana, and her name is Beverly Howard Crusher
Selar. She's an old war-horse, like me. Retired from Starfleet, she's
a Doctor, keeps her license current, served on the ENTERPRISE.

"Yes, THAT Doctor Crusher.

"She bought the old Zelinski, Chamnos and O'Flannegan farms. Has most
of it deliberately going back to prairie. You should go by sometime,
the cornflowers and trumpets are in bloom right now, cowslips, cow's
eyes, California and golden poppies, its a sight to see.

"Her wife -- yes, I said WIFE -- is in the Vulcan space service, so I
guess that means she's Vulcan. Doctor Crusher is about my age, even if
she looks forty. One of those women who take to the rejuv treatments
well, I guess.

"She goes everywhere with her silver wolf, she jogs and runs and walks
and has come over to my place many times, just to visit."

And to gently pat me on my rump and lick between my fingers and
elsewhere, I didn't add. All rather flattering. Beverly is so
guilt-free in her attempts to seduce my big fat behind, its
impossible to fault her aggressive lesbianism.

"Bev's hobbies include amateur wine making. She's won a few prizes,
and her best is a Vulcan modification of the China Berry. Snappy, but
very tasty. I'll cool a bottle for tomorrow's supper. She likes to
bathe in my little river, and I see no reason to protest."

Naomi was softly caressing my arm, and hip. She surprised me by
kissing my hand.

"Speaking of supper, my plebian meat loaf should be done by now. Let's
go inside and eat. And mind you, no scraps for Jake, no matter how
pitiful he seems."

Naomi let her robe fall open as we walked, and I carefully avoided
staring at the wondrous spectacle she offered.

I no longer felt like I was one hundred and eighty-five. Two hundred
and eighty-five was more like it.

---

Sam was on her way to St. Louis at first light. An opening had
occurred in the rejuv program at the Fleet Hospital, and she could
fill it if she left immediately. She promised to treat my flic like it
was a Ming vase. She was taking the opportunity of this vacation and
visit to have the Starfleet hospital there perform most of her rejuv
surgeries. I should join her. It was becoming more than faintly
depressing to be so close to so much female perfection in the form of
Naomi, and be aware of my own fat flabby self.

Naomi was with me constantly. Her bouncing around with just a pair of
unders on, and a one-ply bra, reminded me more pointedly how lovely
she was. Clothes are much more erotic than nudity.

Now why should I use the word erotic?

We nostalgia-drifted through VOYAGER's crew together. Nicoletti was a
full Captain and commanded the POTEMKIN-D, but she might get an
Admiral's jacket any day. No one had seen Chakotay for years, nor the
EMH, Doctor Emil. Chakotay might have joined a monastery. The Doc
wasn't expected back from his mission for another two years.

Feeling obese, I changed into a sweat set, determined to do a little
walking, jogging when I felt able. To my surprise Naomi joined me in
my bedroom, helping me, suggesting shorts instead of long pants. She
shocked me by hefting my large naked breasts in her small strong
hands. She suggested a different bra, and it did indeed feel ....
comfortable.

Had Naomi just fondled my breasts?

My ears burned for the longest time, remembering the feel of those
fingers weighing me, accepting my flab and age without murmur or even
judgment. I hope she didn't notice how fast I spiked when she ....
lifted me. Exciting.

She seemed to like me, actually like me, as is. I wasn't just a faulty
memory enlarged to sainthood.

She replicated an outfit just like mine, same color and style. Only
she didn't need a double D cup. I felt flattered.

She took off her clothes, there in my bedroom, and told me to find my
threederHoloCamera. She would pose for me. She said she was flattered
by my attention, and wished to be preserved for posterity. She asked
if eventually her Holo could be placed between B'Elanna and Seven.

She wandered through my bedroom, admiring the large charcoal Phoebe
had made of me when I came back from the Delta Quadrant. Very nude,
legs apart, foot on a rock, and a very old but not-so-pudgy me, the
more revealing twin to the nude hanging on my wall in the front room.

In this one I had one foot up, hands on hips, belligerent, naked for
all to stare at. Also altered to a lovely transcendent clarity by
Phoebe's magic eyes and fingers. I had a third nude hanging in the
guest bedroom, of me sitting on a barked log, and Jake II at my feet.
I recalled the tree bark on the log kept cutting into my backside
terribly.

It had been like old times, me posing nude for my artist sister (and
saving her model's fees).

She gazed for the longest time at the two threederHolo's I had of
B'Elanna and Annika on my cabinet. Another wet naked B'Elanna with
twisted wet towel in hand, glee transforming her face, about to
butt-snap her oldest daughter.

The other was of a nude wet Annika hefting her own breasts, pointing
her nipples at me. Her smiles were broad then, before she went back
out to the stars.

I finally found the threeder kit in the bottom drawer of my standing
Wardrobe. Naomi stretched out on my bed, lying in a pose guaranteed to
be the duplicate of ninety billion others, of nude girlfriends, wives
and media stars. "Here," Naomi said, "now. Take a few, a dozen,
Kathryn. Please?

How could I resist a plea from Naomi? I never could before. Well, not
often.

The looping needles were set on posts on the floor, and the last stuck
in the headboard of the old oak wood bed. I began taking reclining
nudes.

The first few were gorgeous, but then she turned obscene. Exposing
herself by raising a knee in the air. Then she slid a hand behind her
own butt and began fingering herself. I had to stop to breathe deeply,
blush and cock an inquiring eye at her.

"Please, Kathryn. Keep shooting, please.

"I want to give copies of some of these photos to some very special
friends ... lovers. Please, pretty please, Kathryn? For me? I've seen
your souvenirs on your mantel and here. You'll do a wonderful job,
Kathryn, I'm sure of it. Please?

By now she had two fingers inside herself, her eyes glazing over, and
she sounded wet. She was not faking. I would never have thought I'd be
taking sex photo's of Naomi Wildman Greskrendtregk one day. My ears
burned even while I realized it was exciting to do this.

She came fast, surprising me. I knew she came. She was beautiful
coming like that. Innocent depravity, guileless decadence, totally
captivating! I felt like joining her, except..... I felt THREE hundred
and eighty-five years old.

At some point I left the bedroom, afraid I might watch her sucking her
own fingers. As if that would be too much.

A VERY cold shower for Katie!

Katie shunted aside for later rumination the fact that she was excited
by Naomi's obscene performance. Yes, I was excited. I could still see
how wet and gleaming her pubic hairs had been.

I stood under the water, being chilled, shivering, telling myself I
should feel especially honored by Naomi. She trusted me to do
something for her that few people could, or even imagine, doing.
Having sex threederHolos made for what was very probably a very dear
circle of lovers and friends.

Instead, even with teeth chattering, I wanted to masturbate alongside
her. Katie's getting weird in her old age.

Naomi joined me in the shower, of course. She would. It was virtually
foreordained. She pressed her sleek body against my butt to turn the
water warmer, and then stayed in that position, circling us both under
the kinder warm spray.

"Thank you, Kathryn," she cooed in my ear. I could feel her wet pubic
hairs against my ass when she was turning off the water. "I'm glad
someone finally took those photos for me. It's a wicked idea I've had
for a long time.

"Now its my turn to take a few of you."

I must have looked strange. I know I froze, boggling over the concept
of me lying nude on the bed and getting myself off. Captured for all
eternity, or a few centuries, anyways. Big fat flabby me in a few sex
photos. I liked the concept. My knees almost gave.

"Oh, do relax, Kate .... may I call you Kate? Katie? After this photo
session I think we're both entitled to use more .... intimate names.

"My closest friends .... call me Niki. I hope you'll call me your
friend, no matter what name you use. But Naomi is fine."

She was adamant. I must pose nude for her. I had to lean against the
wall like I was a drunk. Actually I felt giddy as well as scared
white.

Naomi distracted me by offering to braid my long hair. She said my
hair was a glory, especially with the gray-shot temples. She wasn't
the first person to say my temples were pretty or sexy, but it felt
pleasing every time I heard it. All of my hair grew as it did without
artifice or chemicals. A common side effect of the rejuv shots I had
already taken.

Just so long as Naomi didn't ask me to masturbate for the camera. I
think I'd have done it if she'd asked. Even if I WAS four hundred and
eighty-five years old.

It felt exciting to even think of it. Even if I WAS four hundred and
eighty-five years old and my flab... Don't even think of it.

Naomi first had me sit on the bed, my arms back and supporting me. My
new black shorts were on my lap, sort of hiding my belly and sex. She
told me to breath deeply, she wanted my breasts to be out there for
all to admire. I must have had a dozen taken like that until I
couldn't control myself any more.

I broke out into peals of laughter, aware of the spectacle I must
present. Jake had to join me, of course. He thought I was inviting him
to play. I couldn't stop laughing, and Jake was all over me, playing,
adoring me.

That sneaky Naomi .... Niki .... took about fifty threeders, I later
found out. She created magic in ThreederHolo's, she captured Jake and
myself in a new way. Pathetic, touching, natural, embarrassing....

Those 3D's remain some of my dearest possessions. Even if at least one
had me with my head on the floor, legs widespread in the air, Jake
looking down at me and barking, and a great deal more of ex-Captain
Janeway showing than I had EVER contemplated putting out on display.
Certainly not when I was flabby and three hundred and eighty-five
years old. THAT one was destined to NEVER go on the mantel.

Naomi had an evil mind. Certainly she never acquired it while she was
my Aide Memorie or Captain's Assistant, did she?

In time Jake and I both quieted. I looked rather shame-faced at Naomi,
who I just now realized was still nude. What the hell. We were all
girls together here.

Naomi sat with me, petting Jake, caressing me, even on my butt. She
kissed my arm, my hair, telling me she still wanted to get a few with
me reclining. She was very efficient and utterly dictatorial. Nudging
an elbow here, draping one long braid down in front, and then taking a
few with me chewing on the braid.

I was on my belly and side, and I knew she was hiding most of my fat
belly and thunder thighs. Giving me softness, soft lighting, and
languid ease instead of flab and angst and old age.

One of them lies on my mantel now, between my threederHolos of
B'Elanna, Naomi and Annika. Not bad for an old broad of three hundred
and eighty-five.

I finally said enough, and she discontinued taking Holos. I stood in
front of her, knocking down the camera, wondering what size to make
some of the prints. When I looked up into Naomi's eyes, I sensed
something important was about to happen.

She kissed me, working at it, gently and strong and pushing and
genteel in turn. One hand behind my head, the other caressing my
throat and shoulder. Her tongue tip touched my lips, but did not seek
entrance.

After a minute she broke it off, searching my eyes. Then turning to
put on her jogging outfit. I followed suit. Slowly waking up as we
walked out of my yard, side by side. In Mother-Daughter type identical
black outfits.

I was thinking hard enough to set my ears on fire. Stealing sidelong
glances at Naomi, realizing truths.

In the meantime, Jake bounced around, joyous that we were going
somewhere. Anywhere. Jake was ecstatic. TWO humans to play with! Joy
Untold!

I was sweaty by the time we got to the second bend of the river, Naomi
looked like she could run to Muncie and back.

Jake ran leaping into the stream, just like an exuberant child. While
I clutched my knees and panted, Naomi undressed and came to assist me.
She removed my shoes and socks and tugged down my pants, and in a
second or two I was carefully easing myself into the cold clear water.
Naomi watched, her smile impish. She ducked me as soon as I was fully
into the water. After that it was heavenly.

I showed her where the trout and bass stayed under a
boulder-and-fallen-tree ledge, and we both swam slowly against the
languid current, trying not to scare the real owners of this stream.
We would have to come up for air, but it was a different. frigid and
beautiful world down there, underneath the rippling surface. One we
were reluctant to leave.

I finally headed for the bank, Naomi behind me, her hand on my side or
arm. I turned to heave myself onto the bank and she lifted me onto it.
Her head dipped, her tongue worried my belly button, her hands found
my sides and she drew my nipples into her mouth. Then she stepped
back, holding my hands.

"I'm a lesbian, Kathryn. I've been in love with you for more than a
quarter century. Ever since I realized boys were different from girls,
I knew I wanted to be with girls. You. You and Seven and B'Elanna. But
you're the one I dreamt of each night. You're the one I wanted to hold
and touch and be my other mother, and then to be my wife.

"I've loved you for a long time, Kathryn Janeway, and I will die if I
do not tell you, finally, now, how much you have been a part of my
life and my dreams, all these years."

Naomi held me to her, looking up at me, her hands busy on my old
woman's back, my ugly woman's body, my has-been's flesh.

I looked down at her in shock, my flesh cold and hot at the same time.
Part of me had realized this about her for a long time. It was a
surprise. It was not a surprise.

I did not do women. I'm an ugly old woman. You cannot want me. You
must not want me. You're so beautiful you take my breath and my sanity
away. I wish you'd take my breasts into your woman's lips again. Those
lean lips, still so red, even as a child your lips were so warm and
pink.

You are a woman. Do not touch me.

I did not lean back from my darling Naomi. For many years the only
child in my life. She drew closer to me, her breath warming and
chilling me.

But I did nothing to push Naomi away.

Even as a child I knew you'd be beautiful some day. Long straight
nose, sharp chin, strong bones and honey hair. Do not touch me. Do not
touch me. Please do not touch me. Please do.

I am half a century older than you are. You're so lovely. Please hold
me, Naomi. Do not touch me, Naomi, not like this.

"I loved you then, and I still do, Kathryn", she crooned.

I am not a lesbian, Naomi. Please hold me again.

"Do you remember all of the titles you and Seven gave me? One was that
of Aide Memorie. I was to be your memory when you wanted to forget
something, or when you didn't want to forget something.

"I was that old man who stood behind the Roman General in his chariot,
when he headed a triumphant parade, a victory parade.

"Remember, O Mighty One," he would say, "you are but a mortal." I
understood the concept immediately on hearing the story. Do not ever
forget you are a fallible human.

"I never forgot you were a mortal, Kathryn, but I never forgot I loved
you in ways a child never should.

"Maybe you forget, Kathryn, but I remember you when, to me, you were a
goddess. Striding the universe in seven-league boots, performing
miracles, slaying dragons, saving VOYAGER. Still mortal, but a heroine
from a great saga.

"I was your memory, but you were infallible to me. Yet I knew then and
know now you are but mortal, Goddess Janeway. But I still love you. I
have adored you for near thirty years.

"Please do not turn from me now. I love you."

With that she pulled my head down for a lingering kiss. Gentle at
first, then more passionate, then carefully disengaging.

"I do not ask you to love me back, Goddess mine. Just do not throw me
away. Please."

She was on the bank alongside me in an easy twist, not even touching,
just looking at me. I had to take several deep breaths.

"Naomi," I began, "I'm a flabby ugly used-up woman. You can't love me.
I'm fifty years your senior. I don't even see how you could bear to
touch me. Maybe once I was this larger-than-life heroine of the
universe. Now I'm a crotchety recluse, not fit for man and just barely
fit for Jake. Go find someone.... Someone young you can relate to.

"And I don't have women for lovers."

Naomi slid back into the river, turning to me as she floated.

"But you didn't say you didn't love me, Kathryn."

I am not a lesbian. I stared at the eyes once so close in shade to
those of Seven of Nine.

"And I don't believe you when you say you don't have women for
lovers." Suddenly her youth was next to me, once more, on the bank.
Her lips were been chilling itchy warmth on my shoulder, her fingers
tracing down my neck.

"No," I began to protest. "There have been a few times in my life..."
A few times in my life when I've what? Been tempted? "I've never felt
the slightest inclination...."

Naomi broke in on my words. "You have maybe thirty threeder Holo's on
your mantel, Katie dearest. But only two of them are of one person
only. Both the subjects are women, and both are nude.

"B'Elanna and Seven of Nine. Annika Hansen.

"Women only, my sweetest almost-mother. The two you have on your
cabinet are alike. Beautiful women, and nude. Women you love."

A jack in the box, she was back in the river.

She paused, fitting herself to my knees. "You have memories of
B'Elanna and especially Seven. How many Holo's do you have of Annika,
Kathryn? A hundred? Four hundred?"

She touched my eyelids and I allowed it, closing my eyes. Shuddering
to think of the hundreds of snaps I had in storage.

"I am your memory, Katie, your Aide Memorie, and I remember you when
Seven and Chakotay told the crew they would be married.

"You were stricken, Kathryn, you turned to stone.

"For just a moment, but you had those seconds where your universe was
turned to bitter ashes in your mouth. I saw you then, Kate. I stood
close to you."

Naomi rose out of the water again, sitting on the bank on my other
side now,

"I remember a conversation I once had with Seven when she was working
on a map of empires ahead of us.

"Seven," I asked, "do you want to be my wife when I grow up and
become Captain? Wouldn't it be nice to be the Captain's woman?"

"She said no, without further explanation. But I was persistent. She
finally explained that she could be the wife of the Captain now, right
now, if she wanted to.

"Seven said that the Captain, meaning you, were in love with her
already. As she herself was in love with the Captain. Seven wished to
be the Captain's mate, her wife."

My ears were going to melt down and flow off my head if they got any
hotter.

Naomi was alongside me on the bank again, her hip and arm warm against
me. The energies of youth. She whispered in my ear now, her hand on
mine.

"I told Seven that I would mate with the Captain if I could. Seven
asked if I knew what a lesbian was. I replied it was someone like me.
A girl who only wanted to marry other girls. Computer had reluctantly
explained that much to me

"In turn I asked Seven if she liked other girls. She said she did, but
she wanted to marry a man. Commander Chakotay struck her as an ideal
choice.

"I asked if Commander Chakotay wouldn't marry her, what would she do
then?

"She said she'd marry you the second you accepted her proposal."

A day full of bombshells.

"But that it might be bad for the ship if the Captain married the
female Borg.

"Therefore I was not tell anything of this to you, to my mother, or to
anyone else in the crew.

"I think I've held the secret long enough, Kathryn.

"I also asked if Seven loved you, and she said yes.

"I asked if you loved Seven. She said, and I remember the exact words
clearly. She replied; "She loves me, she loves me very deeply, but she
will never admit it to herself. Therefore this is our secret, you and
I, Naomi. You must not even tell your mother."

"There was nothing else Seven ever asked me to keep a secret between
herself and myself. Except this. I think its time to let you know."

I could hear every little insect for meters around. The silence was
iron, and my universe was ice. My memory, my Aide Memorie, had just
slipped me a revelation.

Seven .... I rejected it all, I tried to reject it all. I am not a
lesbian. I do not sex other women. And through it all I digested the
reality of Annika Hansen calmly talking about my loving her, she
loving me, lesbianism and her marrying me.

"You love Annika Hansen even now, don't you Katie, sweet Goddess? And
Seven loved you. I was disappointed that you and Seven never married,
never became lovers.

"When Annika announced her engagement to Chakotay, do you know I was
happy? I believed now it was possible for me to marry you instead. My
competition had left the field."

My Aide Memorie was telling me a truth, I was sure of it.

"I'm not a lesbian, Naomi, and I never was...."

That was as far as I got. Naomi put her hand behind my head again, and
I tilted my head to receive the kiss I knew was coming.

I am not a lesbian, I crooned to myself.

My lips opened slightly, my eyes flickered close, my breath stuck in
my throat.

I am not a lesbian.

I worried my mouth into hers, eyes closed, her taste rich on my
tongue. I am not a lesbian. I am not a lesbian. God, her kiss is so
sweet! I bent into it, our lips slid together, her tongue-tip fought
mine, I could not breathe, my body was tight and full of fire trails.

I am not a lesbian. I am not a lesbian. I am not.

I felt a profound loss when her head bent back, away from me. She was
so lovely. I do not kiss women. I wanted her to kiss me again. My lips
were trembling. I am not a lesbian.

"I love you, Kate." She straightened, a hand rubbing my arm. "Please
do not keep me waiting forever for you to finally realize you love me
back, Katie."

The gall! The arrogance! The .... soft steel of her lips.

Naomi rose to her feet, pulling me erect alongside her. She did not
pull me to herself, but a hand lingered on my arm.

We pulled on our dry clothes, my hands were incredibly clumsy, my
knees were shaky. Naomi closed my bra in front without fondling, and I
breathed more comfortably as the memory cloth grew around me and
supported me. I turned to head back to home and sanctuary. I could
hide there. I would be alone there, alone with Naomi. Sweet warm
Naomi.

Sitting on a log on my side of the river, was Beverly Crusher, her
hand on Tatiana's furry head. She was a hundred meters or more away,
and her visage was untroubled with either smile nor frown. Jake sat
next to her other side, happily bearing her petting hand.

I did not know how long she had been there.

She rose, made a small wave to us, and left, a wolf in her wake.

My ears must melt.

---

The threeder Holo camera was still in front of my bed, patiently
waiting for me to instruct it what to do.

I could not, I must not, review the Holo's it had taken this day. I
told myself I'll do it later.

It felt lonely in my bedroom without Naomi. She had not followed me,
but had gone to her guest room. Jake fidgeted at my feet, wondering at
the disorder in my mind and attitude.

Seven had said she loved me. For reasons rational to me, I never
doubted Naomi's words.

The words were true, I now realized. Annika Hansen had calmly weighed
her options and told of loving me and marrying me.

Had I loved her? Yes, I had loved her, I had loved many people, I had
loved every single member of my crew. Each death was the death of one
of my own flesh and blood children.

Seven's love for me, and mine for her.....

My gut told me I'd always wanted Annika Hansen, ex-Borg, to forever be
by my side. Now I knew she had felt the same.

Maybe I wasn't her first choice, but still.....

Could we have been lovers?

I am not a lesbian. I am not a lesbian. Could I....?

I bustled into other activity, including a quick shower after the long
walk back from the far bend of my river. I kept looking about me in
the shower, realizing I had hoped Naomi might join me. Saddened by the
realization she had already been, and gone.

We were now normality itself. We were Naomi and Kathryn, we were just
two women, Annika and lesbianism and a churning gut did not exist. I
am not a lesbian.

We went out into my garden, Naomi beside me, her hands already knowing
what to do. She took one of my antique bug-pickers aside and worked on
its malfunctioning arms, her hands sure and soon dirty. I worked on
the tomatoes and sugar cane while she made my outside maintenance area
her own. I squatted by the corn, admiring the easy efficiency of her,
her grace amongst machines. When I again paused from my weeding, she
was gone. I discovered her off in the peas, dismantling my water
extractor unit.

I went inside, made us sandwiches from last night's meat loaf, and she
paused in her labors to have a calm and civilized lunch with me. Out
there in my tiny world. She proudly decanted fresh, if tepid, water
for us from my once cranky air-water extractor. We each only got half
a cup before it gave up the ghost again, and I laughed at her three
vivid Klingon swear words.

I remembered B'Elanna when she did that. Realizing Naomi knew her
Klingon first from my sometimes foul-mouthed Chief Engineer.

I had asked B'Elanna once why she cussed unthinking machinery, and she
said it was expected of her. Engineers on ships were supposed to cuss
balky objects in her care. She had lapsed into an astonishing Scots
accent for me then. Grinning as I realized how well she knew another
myth of ships and their handlers. Engineers, according to legend, were
both foul-mouthed AND Scots.

Naomi helped me to my feet, caressing my now loose long hair in the
process. Her light kiss on my neck was expected. I accepted it,
smiling back to my vegetables.

We shared another quick shower, outside, using the hand held shower
head and a little water. Her hand patted my obese butt twice, but I
expected it and allowed it. Her tongue-tip on my neck was reassuring.
At least I didn't feel three hundred and eighty-five years old now.
Just one hundred and eighty-five.

My hand froze in mid-air before I actually fondled her breasts. They,
her, they were so pretty. Her eyes twinkled, hoping I would. I am not
a lesbian. A fondle between friends, that wouldn't be so bad, would
it?

Her legs were so long and perfect. I was back to being three hundred
and eighty-five tears old, just from watching her loose strides take
her across my world.

Sam called that early evening, telling us of her procedures. They had
worked on her face, and she was already becoming a stranger to today
and re-entering the past. I hoped the entire work-up would fit her
well. On the screen she already looked fifteen years younger. I must
begin my own rejuv soon. I wish I had done it last month, last year.
Then I might not look and feel three hundred and eighty-five.

Going to bed, I let Naomi give me a kiss goodnight. It felt almost
customary, somehow, to present my lips to hers, to taste, feel, know,
Naomi. Her hand very delicately in my hair.

Staring at the threeder Holocamera still waiting for me, I sighed and
put it and its loopers on my vanity. Tomorrow would be soon enough.
Jake grumped at my distracted air and slept on my round rag rug.

---

Naomi had breakfast waiting for me and Jake. Different food, of
course.

Mine was a cold fruit salad compote and coffee with a hint of mint to
it. We kissed as she served me. It no longer felt so .... bizarre, to
kiss and caress a woman. Not this woman. It seemed already normal for
her to care for me and for me to accept the care. Expected and
accepted. Naomi whispered into my ear that she loved me. Then turned
to her own greens and fruit salad. I am not .... Oh, but she was so
beautiful with the sun picking up glints in her close-cut cap of honey
hair.

She already had on the green and blue coverall she had worn yesterday,
for working in my garden. It showed the effects of being
replicant-cleaned at least. I had hoped for more brazen nudity from my
ex-Aide Memorie. She was an ancient Greek marble masterpiece in flesh
tones.

I followed soon after, going outside in a old one-piece gold coverall
my size. I worked more easily this morning. A few creams for my aches
and pains did wonders. I kept looking for and admiring Naomi as she
took my extractor apart. I bet she'd have it back into fully
functional mode by tomorrow.

We were developing into a couple. I am not a lesbian. But I sneaked
looks at Naomi as she sweat and labored. I was just admiring beauty
and grace.

In the afternoon we walked and jogged to the far bend in the river.
Matching black outfits adorning us again. Naomi showed off by dashing
to our destination, running back, and doing the trip again, striding
alongside me. She also knew I was busily admiring the way she moved,
especially her tight hard butt. Watching and admiring her was better
than admitting I was wheezing a little, or feeling I was two hundred
and eighty-five years old. How could she stand to look at my fat and
wrinkles, or touch me?

I paused in my disrobing, welcoming the spectacle of Naomi stripping,
posing for me, and then diving into the frigid wet of the river.
Hardly a ripple she made.

The hell with genteel.

I hadn't made a real genuine dive into that river for .... years. I
think I didn't do a bad job of it, since my skin burned only a little
bit from the entry. Naomi was beside me as I broached the surface. She
was being there if I needed assistance. As it was, she clapped her
hands a few times, then pulled me over for a mutual sinking to the
depths and a long kiss in the wet. I am not a lesbian. But Naomi is a
good kisser, I told myself.

At one point we were floating breast to breast, and I was looking into
her angel's face. Expecting to feel that woman's hand on my side or
breasts, in my pubic hairs, lingering on my throat. I felt cheated
when she moved on, smiling back at me.

Naomi helped me onto the bank, our bodies touching. The kiss was
expected, the tightening of my belly wasn't. I needed only to bend a
little and I could take her nipples into my mouth. They were hard and
enticing, sensual, needing a kiss. I stood there, ready for her next
move, but she made none.

I am not a lesbian. But I do love Naomi, she and I go back a very long
way. She is so lovely.

I moved to Naomi, standing behind her, my hand finding her back and
shoulder and waist. Not daring to kiss her bare flesh. I am not a
lesbian.

Naomi whirled, capturing my hand. Kissing my palm. Then walking away.
I am ....

Beverly floated downstream to us, Tatiana already sniffing Jake in
welcome. I waved to Doctor Beverly, squatting on the grassy bank to
converse with her.

"Do you handle rejuv procedures?" I asked.

"I'm just a general practitioner now, but I know ...." she began, then
abruptly stopped. She swam in place, staring at Naomi, then at me. I
blushed in response to her gentle grin.

"Yes," she said. "We could set up an appointment...." Her words
disappeared into her face, warm understanding flowing in to take their
place. She looked at me in a dozen different ways, all at the same
time. A dozen unasked questions, a dozen unspoken answers to the dozen
questions. Then staring at Naomi in her black sports ensemble.

"Could you come over in an hour?" she asked. I'd expected sarcasm,
inquisitiveness, regrets, maybe even bitterness. This was an
attractive woman, a lesbian, who had tried a dozen different ways to
be close to me. Receiving rebuffs and not a few comments to the
universe on how lesbian romance was impossible for me. Instead she
presented a face full of warm human concern. Gone was the
sharp-tongued red-head or the sharp-nosed butch.

I am not a lesbian. And it IS time for me to get my rejuv shots and
surgeries. Nothing else.

"A friend, my other visitor has my flitter..." I could walk the
distance if necessary.

"I'll come by to pick you up. Fiveish? Good. We'll work now and bill
Starfleet later, Admiral. Na?"

I mentally twisted in the wind, aware I was now under an obligation to
my neighbor. And would probably be under a greater one in a very short
time.

Moving like an eel, Beverly hauled her naked flesh out of the river,
came to stand before me, and hugged me hard. She whispered in my ear;
"I envy you this one. She's breathtaking!"


Arms across my own heavy nude breasts, I scowled in a manner once
capable of quieting dissent throughout Delta space. "We are not
lovers, Beverly Crusher Selar!" Bev ignored my statement and grinned
at me, rubbing my arm in what I could only term a conspiratorial
manner.

"Whatever you say."

Before I could correct her mistaken assumption, she gave me a kiss,
waved to Naomi, and was back in the river.

---

I awoke lying on my belly, arms by my side. My world was disoriented
and spotty, until I began processing recent events in my mind.

I was in Bev's little clinic. No, I was in a bed, a hospital type bed.
I could tell the sun was still up, though lowering. I must have been
out for a few hours only.

Then the pain hit me. Pains. Aches. Soreness and pins. Feelings of
being violated, torn asunder, and improperly glued together again. But
only after most of my muscles had been well and thoroughly beaten and
pulped. I hurt.

I must have groaned, because a savior and angel in the guise of a
Starfleet doctor appeared at my side.

"Welcome back to the world of the living, Captain. Admiral."

Bev ran loving fingers through my hair, eyes glittering as she
caressed me and eased my doubts. She tucked my hair back on top of my
head. She was sweaty and looked tired.

"Will you be able to get much done tonight, Doctor?" I asked.
Yesterday she was a neighbor who went around naked a lot. Yesterday
she was a happy-go-lucky dyke who wanted to bed me, no matter how fat
and ugly I was. Today she was a Doctor again.

"I wouldn't recommend any more rejuv or surgical work for at least
twenty-four hours," Beverly replied. She must have read my face, for
she laughed. Then told me that it was seven-thirty in the morning, the
day after she laid me down on her table to be examined and worked on.
She'd just worked on me for thirteen hours straight.

I tried to roll over and thought I'd just skinned myself alive. Bev
helped me sit up, her hands busy all over me. She gave me a shot of
something in my neck.

"This is for pain, but its not very strong. Just take the edge off.
Pain is very useful. It tells you the body has just been abused.

"Procedure is for this much rejuv work to be done over five days
minimum, not overnight. I violated standard protocols for initial
rejuv work, but if you've ever studied my career aboard the
ENTERPRISE, you'd know I had only limited use for standard protocols."

I tried to stand and discovered my aching body was not any happier
with this effort or posture.

I debated asking for something to wear. Where were my clothes, Naomi
must be worried sick, what comes next?

"If you're looking for your girlfriend, she's asleep on my couch. She
doesn't know it, but I gave her a slow-down so she could sleep."
Beverly smiled and leaned closer to me.

"When I told her I was keeping you overnight, she ran the distance
over to here. She showed all the earmarks of staying up all night, so
I gave her a whammy and went back to work."

Bev patted me on my shoulder, having a quiet little joke with herself.
"She was quite worried about you, and she not only swore you two
weren't lovers, she evasively threatened dire consequences if I
screwed you up in any way. She cares for you quite a good deal."

"We aren't lovers..." I began.

"Did I say you two were?" she snapped back. The customary Bev was
still there, underneath her concern.

"At any rate, let's talk about what comes next, and allow me to
explain in detail what I just did to you. Some of its your own fault,
you know. All this pain of yours."

To my confusion she continued. "One of the newer procedures we use now
are to task nanoprobes to go inside a body, multiply, perform a very
specific task, and then die. "Your Borg brought that nanoprobe
technology back to us. Thanks to you.

"What I have just done is to lose you twenty kilos of fat and dead
tissue, and replace it with nano-grafts and muscle. That's why your
body is complaining so much. It's still eating itself alive and
growing tissue you've never had before. The new material is not at all
polite about moving into your system.

"Feel better now? Good. Here, let's get you erect and moving again, a
little steadier now? Good. I want to show you my handiwork."

I tottered a little, still erect, my joints screaming all the while.
Computer showed a life-size me, one which mimicked the real me as any
mirror would.

Only it wasn't me. Not quite.

"I got most of the throat, face and chest wrinkles, the cottage cheese
in your butt and thighs, and took 310 mm off your bust size. More
importantly, your breasts are much more resilient, elastic and
muscle-connected to your chest. You've gone down a few bra sizes, and
I will drop you a great deal more in the future.

"At the end of the treatments you can have the breasts of a chesty
teenager, if you wish. Be flat chested, or even only moderately busty.
I'd recommend teenager and moderate. At your age you'd be amazed how
fast you can sag again, until you can touch the floor with your
sagging breasts. You don't want that.

"I opted for less generous breasts than I was raised with, and haven't
regretted it a day. You've seen how perky and proud my tits are. I
love them this way.

"You've also got four new teeth growing in, all molars.

"You're still excessively overweight, but in this case I follow
protocols and trim avoirdupois off in stages. We let the body
redistribute things and then work on the reallocated fatty deposits.

"Surgical rejuv is artistry at its most basic level, and I'll have to
view the overall body to decide what next can go, and how much of it,
and when.

"Trust me. I'll do wonders for you."

The holographic me turned on its axis, presenting me with a view of
my side and then my rear.

"Not much off your back and butt thus far, moderate tightening on your
thighs."

I was ecstatic. Part of the reason I hadn't gone to rejuv before was
that I was afraid the result would be far from pleasing. This creature
with all her faults on display was not me. Only a younger first
cousin.

"The hard part is yet to come, Kathryn.

"If you do not immediately go into a comprehensive exercise program,
to stabilize the new musculature, all that body tone will go back to
fat and hell. That's the most common reason for disappointing rejuv
results.

You've been given a massive rebuild already, and I'm trusting you to
build your body up to the point where it can assimilate all its sudden
changes. Starting today. This morning.

"I also gave you a standard series of anti-aging shots.

"Did a cleaning of fat around and in the organs. Wonderful little
critters, those tasked nanoprobes. Your heart thinks its seventeen
years old, after I've been busy with it.

"Upgraded your metabolic levels. Cleaned your brain stem and neural
pathways. With all that sand gone from your brain sack, you might find
yourself thinking faster or more clearly.

"But you'll probably still be as stubborn or contrary as you ever
were. Some miracles are beyond my reach.

"The bones are also bursting full of calcium right now. Give them
about forty or fifty days to leach into the bone's matrix by
themselves. Your new you WILL be assimilated. Resistance is futile."

I enjoyed her wandering hands, her attempt at humor, her obvious
attraction to the new body of the younger woman she was so very
attracted to. Let her fondle my backside, my still flabby belly, my
still drooping breasts. Right now she could ravage my overage body for
hours and I'd never say a word against her.

It also was exciting me beyond easy description to be groped a little
by the good doctor.

But I'm still not a lesbian. It IS fun being fondled by Beverly,
though.

I was still me, I was still fat, I was still rundown. But she had
returned a younger me to me and I loved her for it.

The pains diminished at the thought that the best was yet to come.

Naomi came in while I was hugging and kissing Beverly, of course. I
refused to break the clinch. Beverly Crusher was my new heroine, and
I'd be damned if she wasn't worth every touch and kiss.

I spun free, finally, and continued slowly twirling for Naomi's
inspection.

"Look at me!" I wanted to shout. I've lost a hundred years overnight.
I'm thinner and I'm not sagging so horribly in my belly or breasts and
my fungoid ear lobes are gone and the bags under my eyes and my legs
have real honest ankles and knees again.

Naomi came to me in pleasure, mouth open, her hands preceding her. She
lifted my breasts and I spiked so hard and so fast it hurt, and made
me groan. When Naomi moved to take her hands off me, my younger
woman's reflexes held her palms to my stiff nipples. I gasped this
time in a mixture of pleasure as well as pain.

Katie is getting a hair kinky in her old age. Pain and eroticism.

Embarrassed I let go her hands, but she continued to palm my nips,
forcing me to groan again. She bent, her lips and teeth found my
rock-hard tips, and it suddenly struck me I could cum from this alone.

"By the way," Bev interrupted, "I should mention to you, that for now,
lots of you, especially your breasts and nipples, will be very
sensitive, incredibly so." An imp glowed behind her twinkling eyes.

"As a matter of fact, you should easily achieve orgasm from breast and
nipple manipulation alone." I could before, but this was...!

My ears were going to melt. I forced Naomi's head from my aching
glands, then her hands. It was do that or come in front of Beverly,
and I was not that much of an exhibitionist. Yet.

Besides, I am not a lesbian.

I did kiss Naomi, again, however. You can do that with people you
love, even if the love isn't a physical or sexual thing.

I am not a lesbian. I am not a lesbian. What the hell am I then?

We touched tongues after a moment. I broke contact then. I am not a
lesbian. I love Naomi but not like .... that.

I twirled again, relishing the newer me. The old me. Sorta. Naomi gave
me a wolf whistle, and I blushed all over. Maybe I'm not a lesbian,
but Naomi was, and she liked what she saw.

It meant more that she -- and Bev -- had wanted my decrepit flesh
BEFORE my rejuv started. I was surrounded by two people who wanted
more than the nice body I will once more possess.

"I hate to break in on this reunion, gals, but the both of you should
hear this together.

"Kathryn Janeway, you have to exercise.

"I've a few PADDs and a pair of comp filches with more detailed
suggestions. But if you do NOT do at least two hours for the next four
weeks, and an hour and a half for four weeks after that, you're going
to return to the same fat ex-heroine of the Starways that I used to
admire swimming in that damned cold river.

"Exercise. If you want to be Super Kathryn again. Get it?

"Exercise for the rest of your life or face becoming the old fat woman
again, and faster than you think can happen."

"Got it," Naomi and I said in unison.

And my body still hurts so.

Hell's bells, Katie. Do you want to relax or get back the body that
most of the people on VOYAGER wanted to make mad abandoned lust with?

Including Seven -- Annika. I could believe that now. And B'Elanna?

Naomi's eyes told me she knew what my agenda now was. I wanted to
become vital strong sleek sensuous sexy Katie again. Able to carve
wide swaths through every crowded room I entered. My ears must melt
soon.

I am not ....

We hugged, and I ignored my nips spiking again.

"Now leave us, young man. Admiral Janeway and I have more to talk
about." Naomi protested, but it was Doctor's rules now. She'd smiled
hard at being called a young man by the Doctor. Naomi must be quite
butch.

Yeah, what a surprise.

Facing me close enough to bump noses with, Bev asked me; "How
sensitive do you want to be? I can only approximate, but I can give
you a body poised to be excited at the least caress, or nearly dead to
the touch. Your choice. You don't need to decide now, by the way."

"Can I keep, it was, it was very, maybe not quite so sensitive, but my
nipples and breasts, I want to keep some of that.

"It was VERY exciting to be that sensitive there." Bev made as if to
touch my nipples and I flinched, then stood my ground.

"You're erecting already," she observed. "We'll alleviate that in my
next series. Morning after next? Friday early? And there's another
problem.

"You might be, how should I put it? You might orgasm quite easily from
other sexual venues. We can alleviate that as well. But for now, be
damned sure to exercise. It wouldn't do any harm to push yourself and
walk back to your home now.

"Two hours a day, minimum.

"By the way, most sex is great exercise for this."

"Doctor..." My ears are flowing down the sides of my face.

"Even a little unicycle riding with your favorite Risan toys would be
good. Just have sex, solitary sex counts towards body tone. If the
opportunity affords itself for anything better, take it. Now let me
get your clothes."

She let me put some of my old clothes on until I realized they didn't
fit anymore. Then she presented me with a few new green things to
wear. Computer had estimated my new sizes.

One was a gauzy summer creation, a light dress, which barely obscured
my body underneath. Actually it hid the flab, but emphasized my
nipples. I loved it. I ignored the unders that went with it.

"Doctor? If I wear this I'd almost appear nude, wouldn't I" There's a
bit of tease in me after all.

"There might be men in the woods or by the river," Bev said. Getting
into the spirit of my game.

"So? There might have been stray men wandering around in the woods
before this. And its never before stopped either of us from skinny
dipping in the river."

Bev's grin was very wide. She understood the mental and medicinal
value of flaunting, if you can get away with it.

"Here, let me give you a cancer booster first. Then go out there and
soak up all those nasty sun rays."

Bev looked in the direction Naomi had gone. "I envy you," she said.
Then give me a kiss on my cheek and a pat on my rump.

I am not a .... Am I? So what if I WERE a .... ?

It's got to be my body. My belly is in permanent tingle and my groin
aches and my damned traitorous nipples are hard and hurting again.
Just from the thought of a three klick walk across Indiana looking
almost nekkid-as-a-jaybird. Accompanied by someone who might be the
prettiest girl in the entire Solar system.

I am not.... Oh, HELL!

---

My body still ached. It hurt. I was sore in places I was sure there
were no nerve endings to get sore. Even the back of my eyes hurt. Eyes
can't hurt like that, can they?

By my estimation we had done nearly four hours of exercise together,
including a few leagues swimming up and down the river. We had watched
the fish hide under their embankment, and for once I was not short of
breath when we surfaced.

Once out of the river I groaned to think of the long walk still to go,
and then the exercise still to come. Then Naomi began applying creams
on places both erotic and painful. That was what was in that pack Bev
had given Naomi. That and comprehensive instructions.

It was only later that I realized I could have applied most of the
unguents and soothers myself. It felt wonderful to be coddled and
rubbed, though. Bev arranged for Naomi to be the one applying nice
oozy things on my body.

I am not a lesbian. Maybe I'm missing something by not being one.

This wicked child, Naomi, knew very well I got excited by her hands on
my body. Especially when she did the insides of my thighs and
alongside my Venus mound. She applied a clear gel to my breasts, and I
breathed hard for the next twenty minutes.

But I was feeling fairly fit and non-sore by the time we arrived in
the yard and greeted Jake. I was out of breath and my lungs burned, but
I got home.

Jake almost didn't recognize me. With the creams I smelled different
as well. Eventually he knew it was me and he became three Irish
Setters at once, all of them leaving dog hairs on my sticky skin.

The fur goes tomorrow.

Well, now the day was over, the sun was down, and it was time to go to
bed. Alone. Again.

Naomi had helped me get fed, showered, and do a few of what would be
my eternal series of exercises. Forever they took, and Naomi ran me
through them all. She was always there to help, or give moral support.
She had become my private trainer. After that bout of sweaty labor I
REALLY needed those creams Naomi got from the Doctor.

I know I got excited all over again. I didn't dare finger myself, but
I'm sure I blossomed and opened. My nipples sure as all get out got
good and hard.

Obviously I was going to have to have Beverly tone down the intensity
of my sensual responses.

Naomi didn't do a thing to take advantage of me. She could have had me
on that blanket on the floor for the slightest of motions or fondles.
I was expecting a move by her.

No. Correction. I was HOPING for her to reel me in.

I am not .... Well, that might be open to interpretation.

And if I were?

I could still taste her on my lips from our goodnight kiss. I could
still see a light under her door, but I could only clutch my robe
tighter around me as that light went out.

I may not be a lesbian, but I could have used a friendly soul in my
bed. Someone to hold me and pat me on the head. Comfort me and tell me
again how well I was doing.

Inside my bedroom I stared at my pair of Holos on the cabinet top.
Beautiful nude Seven and B'Elanna. And the camera, still full of snaps
of Naomi getting herself off while on my bed.

In fifteen minutes I had a Holo stand set up, and I began reviewing
the scenes of Naomi and her wantonness. I ran through the sequence
twice, trying not to touch myself while viewing her obscene display.

I failed. My hand was its own master, and it found my pubic hair, my
puffy lips, my clit already poking out of its hood. My busy hand
squished in the wet of me, my eyes rolled back, and I pressed both
hands upon myself in desperation. I came. Hard, so hard, so sharp, so
hurting, so shivering.

The second time I used one hand and was barely able to suckle my own
nipples as I came whimpering and biting myself. It was incredible that
I did not draw blood. Hard, fast and painful.

The third time my come was extended, and I reached hard to finally get
myself off. The fourth time I pulled out a vibrating dildo to use on
myself. It was too intense, ten or twelve orders of too intense, and I
had to throw the buzzing instrument on the floor.

I was kneading myself again when I looked up to stare at the elfin
smile on Naomi's shining face. You could barely see through her
nightdress, excepting for her bright hot dark nipples poking the
material out.

"You look like you could use a helping hand."

---

The pain woke me up. My cussing woke Naomi up, and she quieted me by
rolling me over so she could shut my mouth with her lips.

Everything came back then. Every nuance of pain and dialogue. And the
unending series of orgasms we had given each other.

"More," I mumbled in her mouth. "I want to.... Everything. More.
Please, darling?" Darling was the least of what I had called her last
night.

I had never known a gal could, well, come that much and as often as I,
we had. It felt like I had been cheated, all those years. It also felt
obscenely wonderful to lubricate as constantly as I had. Presumably
Bev's magic fingers had fixed the often cranky faucet in my vagina
when she worked on everything else.

It was wonderful. Instead of exercising, eating, or petting Jake, I
wanted to stay in bed and make mad passionate love to this marvelous
child. Like now.

My body under hers, her breasts on mine, her neck under my hand, my
fingers searching for the seat of her wanton body. I found it and
penetrated her tight wet opening. A single touch and she was ready for
me. A teenager's responses. Such a perfect body!

"After...." she mumbled, and then sped to the dumper. Good idea.

Afterwards I cleaned her with a silken-soft terry towel warm with hot
water and soothing soap. Then Naomi did me, and we stayed in the... It
seemed inevitable she'd continue fingering me. Then she added nipple
sucking and Katie was off to the races again.

It was good, very good. All our sex was good. Sometime in the process
it struck me we were inaugurating my bathroom into my list of places
in which we had made love. Fortunately the rugs I had in there were
deep and comfy.

She straddled me and my own fingers quickly found and pushed into her
so damned tight puffy hole. She was a girl who loved to fuck. So was
I.

We made it linger, or tried to, but I still came twice to her one.
Beverly is going to tone me down a little or I'll suffer total
meltdown.

I'd never gotten off from a washcloth before. It helped Naomi's
fingers were busy under that exciting cleaning cloth. Wash cloth as
sex aid. Education was indeed broadening.

What the hell had I been missing for so long?

Naomi helped my still-quivering body to its feet, and we returned to
the bedroom.

"More," I cried, "I want more, sweetheart. Okay, let me eat you again?
You taste so...

"How come I've never heard before how delightful a woman tastes? I
love your taste, especially your come. Do you like mine?"

"I adore the way you taste, Katy dear. You taste like the finest
lotion mixed with the gentlest subtle flowers." Girl knows how to lay
it on thick. I loved it.

After kissing a while, she let me come up for air. I am not a lesbian.

Yeah, right.

"Your sweet pussy tastes like nectar from atop Mount Olympus." I
managed to reply. "I could drink it for hours." She ain't the only
sweet talker in this bed. This old battle-ax figgers the way to a
woman's groin is through flattery. Just like it was to a man's.

Naomi tasted sweeter than any male I had ever known, though. I'm an
expert on how men taste. I've always had a talent for that particular
sexual trick. My throat likes to be filled as well.

Naomi let me steer her to the edge of the bed, prompting her to sit on
the edge. Perfect position. Then I told Computer to open the blinds.
Light flooded in.

Naomi smiled as I knelt in front of her. Nudging her legs open, then
leaning forward as she placed her heels on the edge of the bed. Supple
goddess.

I'd wanted to see, really see, her glorious pussy in the full light of
day. It was as beautiful as I'd hoped it would be. Naomi began to
touch my head, moaning slightly as I explored her groin, her beauty,
her source.

"You're so incredibly beautiful here," I mumbled. "The wildness of
your hair here, the way you are divided into a channel leading to that
little cute hole of yours." My finger proved that cute little hole was
still wet and tight. Girl seems constantly randy. Yum yum.

The scent was as intoxicating as she wet. I leaned forward, testing
it, loving the taste, the texture, the glory of doing this for her. I
loved her, I knew that.

She opened and closed, all at the same time, as her lips enlarged and
my fingers separated her. The scent got stronger as I poked my tongue
tip into her, relishing the increased flow of liquid magic. A
ten-course dinner.

Her fingers helped tauten the flesh at the top of her slot, exposing
to my sight that magic pearl she had. It hypnotized me to see it come
out further, be whitish, be harder. Be more lovely.

Naomi has a gorgeous clit, I thought to myself.

When I touched it with my tongue, I suddenly couldn't stop. That
beautiful part of my lover belongs in my mouth. It was made to lie
warm and pressured and massaged and bitten in a woman's mouth, it was
made for a woman's lust. I understood lesbian sex at that moment. It
was something natural and predestined.

It was right for me to groan in unison with Naomi as I listened to her
passions. I left her clit to lick the rest of her, working my head
back and forth to fuck her with my tongue, my love. Suck the lips,
lick the hairs that smelled so rich. Enjoy every millimeter of her,
her taste, now so full. I enjoyed her cries, I felt giving and I felt
in control and I was lifted to heaven knowing I could give this cum to
her.

I was in love.

When I sucked her clit deep into my mouth, she began to come for me.
At that everlasting minute in time I couldn't lick her, suck her, bite
her, adore her, tongue-fuck her fast enough. I wanted to create magic
and I did.

For long minutes I licked her, calming her, tasting as much of her as
I could, slowing her to where her sanity came back. I lifted my head
when I felt her move, and we bruised lips when she kissed me. I didn't
care. It felt too good to have her kisses.

"More," I begged. "Please. Lean back, let me do this all over again.
You can do that, can't you? Come again for me? You have the most
beautiful pussy in the world, and I want to worship it some more.

"I love your pussy, Naomi, darling, though not anything like the way I
love you." Clumsy phrasing, but heartfelt.

The pain came suddenly. She was going to leave me, we had a month
before the ARGONAUT was rebuilt. It was only a courier-cruiser, but
she would be Captain on it. Lieutenant Commander Naomi Wildman
Greskrendregk, commanding. She would leave me when it was time.

My universe suddenly collapsed. I knew she would leave to take her
posting. I'd been there once myself. The stars still sang in my blood,
when I let it. She would leave me, whatever the level of her new-found
love for me, or mine for her. I would lie in this bed alone that
night. Again.

I will not cry. I will not cry. I had found perfection and it would
leave me.

No doubt about it. I was madly and passionately in love with a woman I
had held as a squalling babe in my arms. I leaned forward, leaning
against the strong thighs of my lover, my precious darling, dear
sweet-smelling Naomi. I had told tales to her when she lay in my arms.
Now I opened her body and licked her oils.

Naomi probably thought my few tears of sudden self-pity were just more
wetness from her eager pussy, her beautiful lovely soft fragrant
perfect pussy.

Somehow I put down my thoughts. I had these weeks and I would use them
and treasure them. I would be a younger Janeway for my darling Naomi,
be the heroine of the spaceways for her, as well as the best fucking
lesbian for her that had ever been.

As my Naomi spasmed under my loving onslaught, as my tongue licked up
her fluids as fast as she gave them, I resolved to be a bright shining
torch in her memory.

I had to pause as I realized I had forgotten her mother, my friend.
Sam was due back from her rejuv in two weeks. She was going to want to
drop kick me all the way back to the Chaco in South America.

So be it. Anything for the time I'd have together with this beautiful
child. I loved her.

No one ever said life was easy. Or that anything was due me, like
understanding and forgiveness. Forgive me, Sam, I thought to myself.
Then leaned my head forward to bury my old woman's face in the
blessing Naomi represented. Forgive me, Sam. Then I was lost again in
the smell and taste and feel of Naomi.

---

The simple two-dress I had over my nudity went on a hook and I
immediately bubbled at Beverly.

"Isn't Naomi the most beautiful woman you've ever seen?" I asked her.
She replied with a yes, of course.

"She is so gorgeous, she is so strong, do you like muscular women,
Beverly?" She kept nodding at me as I went on. She'd probably been
there herself. Head over heels over some young woman and unable to
find the tiniest flaw in her.

"She takes such good care of me, she helps me, she soothes me, she
rubs my hurts and she's the best kisser in the quadrant, bar none. She
thinks this old flabby corpse I inhabit is beautiful, she likes to
nibble on my ear lobes, and thank you thank you thank you, Doctor, for
giving me my real ears back, I love you, you're gorgeous, did I ever
say that to you? You've always looked good enough to eat, was there
ever a time when you didn't have everyone knocking at your door, who
was your first woman, no, don't tell me, I shouldn't have asked the
question.

"Did you ever notice the way Naomi tilts her head a little to the side
when she's really really honestly listening to you? She likes
something called Rice Krispies, and strawberries. I tell her she's
going to lose that exquisite figure of hers if she doesn't watch it.

"She can fix any damned machine I have on my farm, and has. She can
bench a hundred and thirty kilos, and you should see her run! Jake
can't keep up with her, on the distance.

"Jake adores her, he's usually a pretty good judge of character, she
can run him ragged, and it makes him feel so damned USEFUL to run with
her. I'm going to have to get as good as her at running and me and
Jake can stay fit together. Maybe we'll hunt rabbits together. Turn
them loose afterward.

"She can create all those little squares of muscles when she flexes
her belly, and she giggles when you tickle her under the arm and, and,
and she likes to be licked in the small of her back and I absolutely
adore to feel those exquisite horns of hers on my back or my neck or,
we needn't go into that, but her horns are so damned cute and they're
almost a sex toy by themselves and I've gone and said it anyways.
You've no idea.....?"

Bev laid me down on her table and poked something into my neck. I was
going to talk with her about what I wanted done next, but I could
trust her to do good for me. She had so far. She was my heroine, next
to Naomi.

"Doc," I mumbled, "I've got to tell you something important."

"I know," she said. "You love Naomi Wildman and you like being a
lesbian. Welcome to the club. That makes two of us now,"

It didn't strike me until weeks later what exactly she'd just said.
With that I went down to Morpheus.

---

I was still flabby and I was still full of fat and I had one more
session to go with Beverly. I hurt constantly, I was sore constantly,
and my muscles screamed at me sometimes. But I had that one session to
go with my dear darling red-head, and then I would be.....

Not young. No. But I would be back to the small trim woman who had
first strode aboard VOYAGER.

For now I looked half my age, even now, lying nude along my bustling
river. My skin was clear, my wrinkles were gone, I could bench
eighty-five K easy, and I - we - exercised constantly and fucked
constantly. Fuck. It's just another descriptive word, isn't it?

"Aaaaoohh," I had to moan. "Oh, please, please, don't stop, don't
stop, don't ever stop, oh you do that so good!"

I could see the sun through the leaves in the trees overhead, I could
feel my back and butt finding every accursed stone and pebble in this
wonderful grassy bower, and even my sweetheart was feeling the effects
of her dildo.

You ride someone with a nice self-seating Risan dildo long enough and
you risk your sex getting pulled and tugged enough that you can come
right alongside the gal you're riding.

Just call me cowgirl. I LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE bareback riding.

We were sweating, bugs had found us, her knees probably had found as
many pebbles as my butt had, which is why I flipped over onto my back.
Jake was taking altogether too much interest in what we did, I had to
moan constantly, and my legs hurt from me keeping them in the air for
so long.

Good exercise.

Suddenly my spring unwound behind my clit, enjoying the splendid
irritating toothy ring my baby wore at the base of her dildo. My legs
tensed, my hips went crazy feeding myself into that long pliant dildo,
and I felt myself pissing, or more accurately, ejaculating for my
divine lover, my babe, my sweetie.

I went blind and could not breathe. When I came back Niki was slowly
stroking me, letting me tingle down out of my come. soothing me,
rubbing my nipples with her palms.

My baby takes good care of me.

"Time for us to take a nice swim," she whispered in my ear. "You want
to make love on the other side? There's a real nice glade of grass
about two hundred meters upstream."

Wicked wanton woman, perfect woman.

"I'll be the one on the bottom this time, and you can enjoy the rocks
under YOUR knees."

We'd worked our way through every room in my house, even the roof. Now
we were working on the banks of my river. Raised country, I didn't
have to be convinced about outdoor sex. Niki had grown to like it as
well. She liked anything that involved sex. So did I.

We turned our heads and saw Beverly leaning against the bank by us,
hands propping her chin up. I almost expected her to invite herself
into a threesome, but she only twinkled at us both. The envy was
strong in her eyes, but she was a lady and kept her wishes inside
herself.

If I didn't love my baby so much I'd invite her over. But
Katie-me-darling was never one to share lovers.

At least I hadn't felt the urge for some weeks to tell her Niki and I
weren't lovers.

"Enjoy the show?" I teased.

"Better than yesterday's," she replied. "Tuesday's was the best,
though. I presume that toy you had in you was what made your rear end
so orgasmic? It was the "Leaping Lemming", wasn't it? I have one like
it, but my precious little toy is lavender.

"We should compare toys some day."

Before I could complain, she slipped backward into the river and was
gone. Forward wench. I loved her deeply, despite all her bad habits. I
felt more than a little self-satisfaction when she came upon us. I had
Niki, and she was perfect.

"Kate?" Niki began, "I didn't come , you want to do me and we'll put
on a good show if Bev comes back? It kinda excites me to know she
watches us. Sometimes. I shouldn't be afraid she'll be back in half an
hour. Less. Please?"

Whatever my baby wants. "What else you got in your pack?" I asked.

Naomi really groaned hard as I pushed the "Frightened Puppy" into her
ass, but her cries turned to whimpers as she lay on her back and began
fingering herself. Watching me stroke my, our, dildo growing out from
my crotch. My nipples got SSOOOOO hard. It was exciting every time I
became a man. She rolled onto her hands and knees for me. It was even
more exciting feeling my dick ease itself into Niki's tight hole. I
could feel the "Puppy" wriggling inside her as I buried myself deep
into her beautiful cunt.

She had to get on her back, the pebbles were too bad.

Once she'd assumed the position, she began to moan aloud and feed
herself onto me. Her hands found my back, her ankles locked behind my
ass, and we made the most beautifully obscene sloppy fucking noises
together. My baby began working herself into her first come within
seconds of entry. She liked getting done in her rear hole. Both holes
at once. Beautiful slut.

Oh my, her cries were so enchanting. Her obscenities, her clawing, her
quivering, her kisses. I began to rub my nipples some ten minutes
later, as Niki began her second come. I was going to join her, I was
getting off from the dildo pulling at my sex as it worked my
sweetheart.

I'd gone for moderate breasts, but kept a lot of sensitivity and my
large aureole and hard hard hard nipples. I felt so hot, I felt so
sex-tense, I knew we were going to come together. My hole probably was
so hot and tight right now I couldn't get a finger inside myself.

Life was good.

---

Niki had built a sex chair for me, a faux-cherry wood construct
guaranteed to hold six sex crazed Bolians at any one time, without
collapsing.

Padded seats for the sexee and sexer both, with padded arm rests and
padded leg rests. Great way to spend a lazy summer interlude. The sun
shinning through my cedars. Me sprawled back and spread out. Niki
sitting between my thighs. No more cricks in our necks, provided we
sexed outdoors in my chair. And Niki devotedly using her gifted face
on my sex.

We could also wear dildos and fuck each other in the chair as well.
I'd gotten to like fisting, and Niki adored rubbing our pussies
together, now that we were both slim and supple.

Just to be safe Niki sprayed my groin and hole with a lubricant, then
her right hand, when we fisted. My baby took such good care of me.

Right now we were going to put our mouths to good use. That was still
our favorite loving. Lips and tongues and teeth and tender fingering.
My Niki had the softest mouth on Terra or off it.

I felt very loved in my lovely new chair. Spread eagled and ready for
whatever came my way. A little raising or lowering of the respective
seats, and I'll be able to do her next. All in the most sybaritic
comfort imaginable.

Maybe I'll fist her later. First we had to enjoy licking and tasting
our delicious wetness. I loved the sight of her fingers masturbating
at blinding speed as I finger fucked her. Do I sound like I like
lesbian sex? And there's so MUCH of it.

Something was nagging at my mind as my pussy muscles began to
rhythmically clamp themselves on her invading fingers. Her mouth
clamped itself to my clit again, sucking it in and biting it, making
me arch and shake and come for her. I usually came quick for my
darling's loving.

As I came, that nagging something blindingly clear. I turned my head
when Sam Wildman walked around the corner of my house and almost
literally stumbled over the pair of us having mad passionate lesbian
sex.

Her precious little daughter and disgustingly aged perverted battle-ax
dykey me.

Remind me to put up the privacy screen next time I have sex in my back
yard. It sort of spoiled the surprise I was going to show Sam. Let her
awe over the slim sexy me. Then we would both gape at the new younger
Sam. I'd hoped she would approve of my new young body, the one with
the smaller tits and the (almost) muscular body.

"Niki?," I began, continuing with a "Naomi? Will you come up for air,
please, pretty please sweetheart?

"There's a surprise here for you.

"Your Mother has returned a day early."

We both gazed at Sam and she gazed at us for a full minute.

"Does this mean the two of you are going to get married?"

---

Damn all, but I couldn't stop crying. Sam couldn't either. But she at
least would get a few minutes more with Niki than I was going to have.
We had agreed that as her mother, Sam should get the last seconds.
Then ARGONAUT would beam its new commander aboard, and we both would
be left staring at a few fleeting twinkling notes in the air. The
ARGONAUT would also beam Sam onto a Beijing-Monteveido Sub-Orbital
flight, as a courtesy to the Captain.

Me? I would be left standing on the concourse, feeling how empty my
arms were, how dead I was, how great my loss. What the hell was I to
do without my babe? Where to go? Why continue?

I had hours of our weeks captured in my comp and the cameras. How
could I stand to observe our often grossly obscene times together when
my arms could not find her?

A shimmer, and she was gone. Another shimmer and then forgiving Sam
was gone. I should miss her earthy observations on our mismatched
romance. I should miss the feel of her new skin when she was finally
persuaded to strip for us two sinners and show us what her rejuv
looked like.

Sam looked pointedly at me at one point, then brought my hands back to
her hard young breasts and her gorgeous flat belly. We had both come
out of the rejuv process in superb condition.

Sam spent a lot of time with us as naked as we ourselves. Even
swimming in my river, and greeting Beverly when she joined us in a
swim. Bev fondled her more than she should, but Sam forgave my Doctor
her naughty questing lesbian touches.

When in a lesbian Rome, expect to be fondled.

Sam even seemed just a tiny bit let down to hear we had no plans to
get married. Not now, or in the future.

I knew, even if Sam didn't, that Naomi was already married. To her
Starship. I'd been there myself.

We were lovers, and that was it. I had to learn to live with it.
Reality was being cold comfort today. I would go on, I knew I would.
But how?

I was weighing the thought of bringing a nice bottle of Picard over to
Beverly's place and having a small crying and drinking jag. I could
trust her to pour me into that nice hospital bed she kept handy. I
couldn't trust her to keep her hands to herself in the process, but
that'd be comforting tonight. I'd enjoy my body being appreciated by a
loving friend.

Then I was transported up.

It was the inside of a cabin, not so large as on VOYAGER, but comfy
enough, I guess. I didn't have eyes for much else than Niki, my
darling Niki.

"One last kiss," she breathed, and then our lips meshed. We were both
crying, we were both moaning, we were both desperate, lost, doomed,
aching. We had only these few moments, we both knew it.

"Promise me," she began, but I interrupted her.

"I'll be faithful, Niki, only just come back to me some day, please,
please, come back some day!"

"No, Katie," she said. I felt a sudden cold inside. But she continued.

"Beverly and Selar have the correct approach to our brand of love,
darling." Her hands were fire, her face so precious to me. I am a
foolish old woman but I love this child.

"Go back, Katie, and be yourself. Find another lover, find a man, find
a dozen lovers. Be happy.

"Like Kirk before me, I am married to my command and the paths between
stars.

"But always hold space in your heart for me, Katie me darling. Make
room for me, for some day I shall come back. Do not wait for me, but I
promise to come back some day. Some day.

"I've already crossed half the galaxy, I can do it again if need be.
Trust me on this.'

"And if you find another woman, out there, or on your ship?"

"I will, Katie, I can promise that I will. I know myself too well to
think otherwise. But I shall be back some day. Do not wait for me or
make promises or expect promises from me. But I will be back."

We kissed again and again until my sweet tapped her Comm badge and
called for my transport back to the S-O platform concourse, to where
my flitter would take me to a lonely house.

I drank in my last sight of her. So tall and strong and beautiful in
her Starfleet uniform.

I leaned forward quickly and took one tear with me, fresh off her
stoic face. On the concourse I drank down that tear, ignoring my own
tearing eyes.

Then the transporter twinkled again. Her feet were now bare, and Niki
was pulling up her service trousers. She handed me her panties, warm
from her body. In seconds I had skinned out of my own panties and
handed them to her during our very last kiss.

I waited a long time, there, on the concourse. She didn't reappear,
and I eventually turned to sit down somewhere.

Eventually I sighed, held my trophy up to my nose, inhaling her scent
and a trace of perfumed talc.

"Wow," came from a soft voice beside me. I turned, seeing my
surroundings for the first time.

The girl who had made the sound was a dark skinned woman, my size,
black straight hair, dark eyes, a Sari wrapped about her body. India
sub-continent maybe, originally. She wasn't a pretty gal, actually,
but she twinkled at me as I smiled back at her. Twinkles are lovely.
She couldn't be much older than Niki.

"None of my girlfriends ever gave me a kiss like that for goodbye, or
a souvenir like that either," she said. "Have you known her long?"

All my life. Forever.

"Only a few weeks," I said instead.

"Wow," she said again.

Her brown eyes were so pretty. One could drown in a pair of eyes like
that.

Move on, Niki had said. Time to get back on the horse that had just
thrown me.

Twisting, I made to put my souvenir in my pocket. I didn't have one on
this dress.

"Excuse me," I said. I rose to my feet, stepped one foot into Niki's
panties and then the other and dragged them into place. They were a
perfect fit on the new resplendent me. I had one fantastic body now. I
hope everyone got a good eyeful.

The Indian gal's were wide and bright. I think I had piqued someone's
interest.

"I'm Kate," I said, holding out my hand and fluffing my long hair a
bit. I was mostly gray, so people would realize I'm a rejuvie. White
temples, shot through streaks otherwise. Beverly said it looked
smashing.

"I'm Atti," she grinned back. Her hand was warm and faintly sweaty.
She smelled of exotic spices and she was nervous in my presence. "I'm
waiting for my mother and father," she added.

"Where's your girlfriend," I asked.

Eyes downcast, she returned; "I don't have a girlfriend right now."

We continued to hold hands and I think she was squirming a tiny bit.
"I'm thinking of going over to Kenosha," I said, "I know this great
Chinese restaurant there. What are you doing after you take your folks
home?"

As she moved I had time to admire her. Young, not so shy now, a nice
large pair of breasts, she kept licking her lips when she looked at
me.

Maybe she can swim. The river's cold, but I knew where all the softest
bowers of grass were.

Life can be good.

---

continued in the second story in the Aide Memorie series 'Out'