The BLTS Archive- The Path Not Taken
by Vicki L. Reid 

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Disclaimer: Paramount owns all things Star Trek, including my favorite
characters and the universe in which they live. I'm only borrowing
Deanna and Riker for a little while--just for fun, I don't get a dime
for these tales.

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Deanna Troi stared at the Federation symbol on the viewscreen with
unseeing eyes, tears trickling down her cheeks unheeded. Tears she had
refused to let Worf see. Somehow she had known that he was close to
the breaking point, needing just one little nudge to send him
rampaging through the quadrant wreaking havoc and leaving death and
destruction in his wake. She would not be that nudge. As he had said,
Worf had always been inclined to seek the difficult path, and this
time was no different. His love for Jadzia was deep and strong.
Perhaps she would await him in Stovoqor after all.

Finding the thought oddly disturbing, Deanna refused to dwell further
on Jadzia Dax and her path to the afterlife. But her mind rebelled.
Jadzia had won Worf's heart, and Deanna couldn't help but wonder how.
Jadzia Dax seemed to be the total antithesis to herself. Outspoken to
the point of brashness where she was much more introverted. So what
had made Jadzia so special in Worf's eyes? Was it her willingness to
become Klingon? Almost overnight it seemed to Deanna that she had lost
Worf to Jadzia and still didn't understand why. When she searched his
soul, Deanna felt the love he had for her still strong, but shielded
away from what he had felt for Jadzia. Compartmentalized in much the
same way as her feelings for Worf and Will.

Her thoughts were interrupted by a noise behind her. "Did you tell
Worf our news?" Will Riker asked.

Surreptitiously wiping the dampness from her cheeks, Deanna said, "No.
The topic didn't come up."

A faint frown marred Will's forehead. "He needs to be told, Deanna,"
he told her. "Worf will hate finding out about our engagement from
someone else."

She turned to face him, eyes burning with frustration and anger. "I
won't add to his burden, Will. You didn't talk to him. I did. Worf is
barely holding his life together. He doesn't need to know about our
love life right now. It won't help him deal with Jadzia's death."

Will's frown deepened. "I know the two of you still have . . .
feelings for each other," he said carefully. "Love like the two of you
shared doesn't ever die completely. Won't it hurt him more if you're
not the one to tell him?"

Rising to face him, Deanna said, "I'll tell Worf of our engagement,
Will. But there's no hurry. We're not getting married tomorrow, after
all."

Chewing on his bottom lip with his teeth, Will stared into Deanna's
eyes. Emotions flashed across his face. Finally, he asked huskily, "
Do you want out of our engagement, Deanna, now that Worf is free?"

"Of course not, Will," she answered just a shade too hesitantly. "I
don't go back on my word." She sighed. "Worf is overburdened as it is
with guilt and remorse. I'm simply not certain how he will take the
news of our engagement. We can wait until he's had time to process
Jadzia's death."

"I would understand if you've changed your mind, Imzadi," he said
softly, the pain in his voice pulling on Deanna's heart. "I won't hold
you to your promise if you want Worf."

Deanna smiled, but it never quite reached her eyes. "Worf is my past,
Will, you are my future." She paused for a moment. "I will honor my
commitment to you."

Will sighed, visibly strained by the conversation. "That sounds
suspiciously like a Klingon point of view."

Raising one eyebrow, she asked, "And what's wrong with honoring one's
commitments?"

"Nothing," he responded with a shake of his head. "But I don't want
you marrying me because of some mistaken sense of honor. I want you to
marry me because you love me."

Deanna touched his bearded cheek, streaked now with gray, and said, "I
do love you, Will. You have always been my Imzadi."

As Will stared steadily at her, Deanna could sense his internal
struggle. Apparently appeased by her words, Will said, "If you're
sure, Deanna." Caressing her lips with a gentle kiss, he added, "I
must get back to the bridge."

Watching his tall form stride purposefully toward the door, Deanna was
amazed at the growing amount of gray in her Imzadi's hair. They were
both reaching an age where it was time, probably well past time, to
settle on one mate. Especially if they were to have a family.

Hearing the door whoosh closed behind him, Deanna let down her guard,
allowing her pain to flood her being. No matter how much she might
love Worf, and she did love him, she could never be reunited with her
tIqqoch. Even though Jadzia was dead, Worf was still unattainable
because of her life choices this time. When she and Will had made love
on the fountain of youth planet, she had chosen a different path. A
path which lead away from Worf. Now she must lock her feelings for
Worf away behind a secret door in her heart. She didn't love him any
less, but could no longer acknowledge the love openly.

A single stupid act had cost her everything she held dear. Others
might look upon the recapturing of lost youth a treasure beyond
measure, but for Deanna it was the worst thing that had ever happened
to her. For with the return of youthful hormones, came unfulfilled
yearnings and desires for a man who could never be hers. And so she
turned to someone else--just like a hormonally crazed teenager. Deanna
closed her eyes, reliving the moment when she realized she had lost
Worf forever.

---

Stroking Will's freshly shaven face, Deanna grinned, "Much better,
don't you think?"

"I'm not so sure," he smiled a little ruefully. "The beard has been a
part of me for a long time. I sort of feel naked without it."

Her eyes traveled downward. "You are naked, Will."

Pulling her tightly against him, he said, "So are you, Imzadi." He
lowered his head, capturing her lips in a kiss with both passion and
promise. Regretfully raising his head, Will said, "I suppose we've
stolen enough time. The captain is probably looking for us."

Again stroking his smooth cheek, Deanna felt rather badly for shaving
Will's beard. She found she missed it as well. "I expect he is," she
said with a smile. With just a hint of humor in her voice, she added,
"Now I wonder where your clothes are, Commander."

Although he grabbed for her quickly, Deanna swiftly slipped away,
laughter ringing in the small bathroom, which was mostly taken up with
the tub still full of bubbly water with bits of whiskers mixed in with
the bubbles. She raced through the open door, naked as the day she was
born, still laughing at his expression. And stopped dead in her
tracks. Will, only paces behind her, was unable to stop as quickly,
and ran into her. Only by grabbing her arm did he keep from knocking
her to the ground.

"Deanna?" he asked, "What's wrong?"

Her eyes widened to their fullest extent, and Will's gaze followed
hers. The lovers found themselves staring into the eyes of a Klingon.
A very angry Klingon, if Worf's expression was any indication of his
feelings.

"Captain Picard has been looking for the two of you," Worf growled. "I
will tell him I have found you."

Turning on his heel, Worf strode toward the door. Rushing across the
room unheeding of her nakedness, Deanna pulled him to a stop. "Worf,
wait!" she commanded.

His eyes raked her up and down, as his jaw clenched and unclenched.
Rage, frustration, pain, and finally resignation raced across his
face. "You have chosen your path, Deanna," he said softly, touching
her face with a gentle hand. "I will honor your choice."

"Worf, please," Deanna begged. "Let me explain. The planet . . ."

Placing his fingers against her lips, Worf acknowledged, "I have no
right to dispute your choice, Deanna. I gave up the right when I wed
Jadzia."

"You don't understand, Worf," she said, tears filling her eyes.

Again he touched her cheek, in the same place which bore the faint
outline of his teeth. "I do understand, Deanna. I feel as you do, but
our love was not meant to be it would appear." He sighed. "Be happy,
tIqqoch."

---

And then he was gone. Gone from the Enterprise. Gone from her life.
*The path not taken,* she thought regretfully. Worf was her soulmate,
but he had made it clear that day that he expected her to honor her
choice and marry Will Riker. His conversation with her had made it
clear that nothing had happened to change Worf's mind. Making love was
a lifetime commitment for a Klingon, and his expectations of her were
the same. In his eyes, Jadzia's death had freed him, but her
commitment to Will still held. Worf might not like it, but felt
strongly it was the right thing to do.

Will Riker was a good man, perhaps better than she deserved. Knowing
her feelings for Worf, Will had done the honorable thing in his eyes,
and offered her freedom from her vow to him. But she coul