The BLTS Archive - The Captain's Shore Leave
by Jaeti (jaeti@aol.com)

---

Yet another installment in the challenge of having Janeway
"do the crew".

Poor Kathryn, she tries so hard to stay official, and
prurient minds keep making her fool around. But it's just so
darn much fun!

As usual, this probably has too much smut for story freaks,
and too much story for smut freaks. So sue me -- it appears
to be how I write 'em. This is not to be taken seriously. .
. well, except for the Tom/Harry/B'Elanna stuff. . . that
relationship is insisting on creeping into everything these
days. This story does contain sex among various combinations
of consenting adults, and so is not for children,
congressman, or closed minds. As Mozart said of "Figaro" --
this is just a frolic. . . so come play with me. Oh -- there
is a reference to an earlier story, "The Captain's Gift"
though you certainly don't need to have read it to
understand this one.

Oh yeah, Paramount owns these characters, and what I choose
to do with them belongs to me.

---

Kathryn Janeway shifted her pack to her other shoulder, took
a swallow  of water from the canteen at her hips, and
continued up the winding path.  The day was warm, but a soft
breeze prevented it from being uncomfortably  hot. The
scents of evergreens and flowers were everywhere, and the
sun  shone down through a dark, almost purple sky. It was a
beautiful and serene place and Janeway thought to herself,

"This is the most. . . boring shore leave I've ever taken."
With a sigh, she dropped any pretense of enjoyment and
settled herself under a tree for a good sulk.

Two weeks before, she and Chakotay had been sitting in her
ready room going over supply reports when her com badge
beeped.

"Neelix to Captain Janeway. Do you have a minute?"

Glad for any diversion from the dry reports, even if that
diversion  was Neelix, Janeway pushed the padd aside.
"Commander Chakotay and I  are in my ready room going over
reports. But I'm sure we can take a break. Is it something
that can be discussed up here?"

"Why, yes it is - I'll be right up." and within moments, he
had joined the two in the wide-backed chairs of the ready
room.

"Captain, I've noticed that we are passing within range of
Catarna. . . in particular, Catarna V. Have you thought
about making a stop for supplies?" Before she could answer,
he was rushing on. "Because if you are, I can't think of a
better place than Catarna. Captain, it is a beautiful world,
and its people are very welcoming to strangers who come for
trade, or for recreation."

Chakotay perked up and said, "Recreation? What kind of
recreation?"

"Oh. . . well. . . anything you like really. There are
several continents on the planet, and most are replete with
beautiful cities, rich cultures, and wonderful food. Then,
there's Sharbithia, which is completely uninhabited. The
Catarnans have left it undeveloped for the enjoyment of
those who enjoy exploring, hiking, swimming, and spending
time in the wilderness."

Chakotay leaned forward, elbows on his knees. "Mr. Neelix,
you  seem very anxious to sell us on a visit to this planet.
You wouldn't happen to have, um, 'friends' there, would
you?"

Janeway had to catch the corners of her mouth in her teeth
to prevent  a grin from escaping. In the past, Neelix'
"friends" had spelled trouble for Voyager - invariably
turning out to be customers he had cheated, or traders with
shady deals to offer.

"Oh no, Commander, I don't know anyone on Catarna. . . at
least I don't think so. I just know the planet's reputation,
and I know that the crew has been between shore leaves for a
long time. And I wouldn't mind it myself -- having a meal
that I didn't have to cook first."

Chakotay turned to look at her. "Well, Captain? It does
sound  like a perfect place for leave. . . with enough
variety to please everyone.  And it would be nice to feel a
sun on my face."

Janeway looked from one pair of wistful eyes into the other,
then  threw up her hands in mock surrender. "All right, you
two, I can tell when I'm outgunned! We can spare a couple of
weeks. Mr. Neelix, why don't you give the coordinates to
Paris. It sounds like we're going on vacation." And warmed
by Chakotay's grin, she went to the desk to call up rosters
for shore leave.

---

Janeway had chosen the second week of their two-week stay
for her own shore time, and spent the first week exploring
her ship from top to bottom. She had always been a captain
who was in tune with her ship, but out here in the Delta
Quadrant, that little personality quirk had become a
necessary survival technique. With no starbases for repairs,
and with no guaranteed source of spare parts, it was vital
that she know Voyager intimately, and be ready with
contingency plans should systems fail. It was that very
knowledge which had allowed the ship to survive many battles
and disasters that normally would have had them dry-docked
for months.

B'Elanna Torres studied Janeway out of the corner of her
eye. This week had been intense, exhausting, frustrating and
exhilarating. They had crawled through Jefferies tubes, run
diagnostics, created mock- emergencies and solutions to
same, and argued far into the night about gel-pack renewal,
warp coil efficiency, and shuttle maintenance. From the
beginning of this journey, she had respected Janeway's mind
-- at once methodical and creative. Now she had come to
realize how much she liked this woman. . . and how much she
enjoyed these times when the two of them were able to spend
long hours focused on the ship they both loved. . . and
depended upon for their daily survival.

"Well B'Elanna, I think that does it. She's as tight as the
two best scientists in this quadrant can make her." Janeway
turned and held out her right hand to her Chief Engineer.
They shook hands solemnly, then grinned at each other.

"Shall we grab some dinner to celebrate? Neelix isn't back
yet, so we should be able to get something edible."

Janeway shook her head at the invitation. "Thanks, but I
think I'd better grab some soup and start packing. My leave
begins in 10 hours and I want to be ready."

Torres gathered up the last of the equipment and followed
the Captain  to the lift. "What are your plans for leave?"

Janeway shook her head. "I don't have any fixed plans,
though I know I'm headed for the wilderness continent. I've
always enjoyed my solitude while on leave -- it makes a
change from my time on the ship."

B'Elanna looked surprised. "You don't strike me as the
camping-and- wilderness type."

Janeway chuckled. "No, I wouldn't say that I am. I carry all
of the creature comforts with me; I would've made a lousy
pioneer." With that, the lift doors opened and with a quick
smile, Janeway strode down the corridor towards her
quarters.

---

Later that evening, Janeway was putting the last of her gear
in the anti-grav bag. Chakotay had been by earlier to regale
her with the beauties of the planet, and had advised her on
some additional supplies to take. He looked rested and
happy, and she felt a twinge of regret that they had not
arranged to spend this leave together. But Tuvok, who never
asked for leave, had been thrilled with the libraries on
Catarna, and had not been at all perturbed when she
suggested he take both weeks to peruse them for any
information that could help them in their search for a way
back to the Alpha Quadrant. That left she and Chakotay with
split leaves. . .  and he, at least, had benefited from the
solitude.

She snapped the lid closed with a sigh, just as her door
chimed.  Thinking that it was Chakotay with "one more thing"
she had to take,  she was surprised when she turned to see
B'Elanna standing in the doorway.

"Why B'Elanna, come in. I thought you would have left by
now. Coffee?" and Janeway moved towards the replicator.

"No thanks, I can't stay." B'Elanna took a deep breath then
said, "I just wanted to let you know that Tom, Harry and I
will also be taking some quiet time on Sharbithia this week.
We would love to have you join us. . . but I understand if
you'd prefer to be alone."

Janeway was surprised and touched. In her years of command
she had not often socialized with her crew, and it was only
on this ship and in its crazy circumstances that the crew
had begun to issue such invitations. For a moment, she was
tempted. It would certainly be nice to have some fun and she
did enjoy the company of the younger officers. But in her
head played those old tapes from the Academy days, "A
Captain must remain  distant from the crew". Although the
barriers were coming down slowly  (stuck out here as they
were it was necessary for her sanity), it may not yet  be
time to frolic with her crew on leave.

"Thanks for the invitation, but I think I'll stick to my
original plans. If this Captain doesn't get time alone, she
gets pretty cranky!"

B'Elanna shrugged slightly, a grin twisting the corner of
her mouth. "Well, we can't have you cranky -- especially
with coffee so "expensive" in these parts. If you change
your mind, just set your tricorder -- it looks like we may
have the whole place to ourselves. Most of the crew is
looking for more 'sophisticated' relaxation."

Janeway nodded. "I'll keep that in mind. And  B'Elanna. . ."
This as the younger woman turned to go,  ". . . I really
appreciate the thought."

With a small wave, the engineer left to begin her own shore
leave.

---

Janeway had been looking forward to a week of solitude and
hiking. In the past, if she couldn't get home for leave,
this had always been her choice. Time away from people,
demands they placed on her, and the demands she placed on
herself. But it seemed solitude was not what she  needed now
-- maybe she needed to interact with people, not get away
from  them. This command was so different -- because of the
lack of other Starfleet personnel to socialize with, and
because of her years of protocol barriers, she had no
friends on the ship other than Tuvok, and the beginnings of
one with Chakotay. The time she spent at Sandrine's was
relaxing, but she had shied away from making those final
connections of friendship with any of the other crew. But
after all of this time, she was getting very lonely - and it
was time to start taking some risks.

With renewed determination, she picked up her tricorder and
scanned  the area. Wilderness for miles in every direction,
no dangerous animals or plants, and. . . that could only be
B'Elanna, Harry and Tom about a kilometer away. Janeway
hesitated for only a moment before heading towards those
life-signs. B'Elanna had sounded sincere when she invited
her to join them. It was only her own sense of protocol that
had kept her from saying 'yes' in the first place. And now,
after three days of solitude and boredom, protocol seemed
like a foolish reason to spend any more time alone.

She arrived at the edge of the woods and looked out at an
idyllic  scene. The trees ended at a sandy beach which fell
in a gentle slope to a  clear blue lake. The boundaries of
the lake were just at the edge of her  sight, and the water
looked cool and inviting. At the sound of laughter, she
shaded her eyes from the sun and looked out into the water.
Harry Kim and Tom Paris were splashing and laughing in the
water. As she watched, they grabbed each other in a wrestle
hold, and disappeared under the water.

Janeway smiled and shook her head. . . men really were just
boys in  big skin - always ready to play. When the two
surfaced, she headed towards them, but her greeting died on
her lips, and she backed hurriedly into the cover of the
trees. The two were still gripping each other, but the hold
had turned to caresses, and they were kissing ferociously.
Janeway knew she should leave, but remained; her eyes
riveted to the tableau before her. Tom's hands were gripping
Harry's head, Harry's hands were roaming freely over Tom's
back. . . and under the water to places she could see only
in her imagination. Janeway stared at the two, beautiful
young men, hands roaming over water-slick bodies, mouths
breaking free to nibble and murmur endearments she could
almost hear. Telling herself again to leave, she was as
rooted to the spot as the trees that hid her presence from
the lovers in the water.

A slender figure moved out from behind another crop of
trees, and  moved to the water's edge a few meters away from
where Janeway was concealed.

She glanced over to see B'Elanna Torres, hands on her hips,
glaring at the two men. Her voice carried equally to those
in the water, and to the one who watched.

"So. . . I leave you two alone for a couple of hours, and
this is  what I find?"

The two in the water broke off, and turned in unison to face
her.  Janeway held her breath, wondering if B'Elanna had
been as surprised as she to know that the two were lovers.
The men broke into sheepish grins and waded towards her --
revealing the rest of their bodies to Janeway's
still-riveted gaze. She caught her breath for a different
reason as the two reached B'Elanna and embraced her between
them. The Klingon  pulled away easily. . . and glared at
them.

"Stop it, both of you! You were presupposed to be gathering
supplies, not to be fooling around. And besides, you're
getting me all wet."

Taking her words in a way that she hadn't meant, Tom moved
back to her side saying, "Ohhhh, really? Well, if you're
ready, so are we!"

Finally, a reluctant smile playing on her face, B'Elanna
dropped her angry pose. Shaking her head, she flashed a look
over to Harry. "Tom, you are incorrigible. Why do we put up
with him, Harry?"

Harry grinned back. "Because dear one, you would exhaust me
in a week. We need his energy!"

"Energy, I'll show you energy. . . " and Tom pulled B'Elanna
back to his side, his hands roaming over her with the ease
of long practice. Harry moved in behind her and the men
continued to stroke B'Elanna, their mouths rejoining across
her body in another hungry kiss.

Janeway was no voyeur -- but she couldn't tear her eyes away
from the tableau a few feet from her. Golden skin against
white against brown. Hands stroking, holding, clasping
together, releasing. Murmurs to laughter, to sighs, to
moans. Her own breathing increased as she watched the
pleasure they were taking from and with each other. As the
men began to divest B'Elanna of her clothing, Janeway came
to herself and realized that she had no business watching
from the trees like a Ferengi out for a cheap thrill. As
silently as she could, she moved away from the clearing and
back towards the path.

When Janeway was finally out of earshot, she dropped her
pack to the ground, and leaned back against a tree. Her mind
was whirling -- B'Elanna, Harry and Tom? Stable trios were
rare -- especially among humans -- yet their ease together
demonstrated that this was not a new relationship. They had
seemed comfortable together .. and certainly passionate
about each other.

Passion. . . Janeway shook her head. Another thing that had
gone by  the wayside due to command protocol. Every book she
had ever read, every commander she had ever served under,
had stressed the importance of keeping a distance from your
crew - and of never having a sexual relationship with
someone under your command. Being in the Delta Quadrant,
that rather limited her options. Except for that brief idyll
with Chakotay on the planet they had named "New Earth"

Janeway gave herself a mental shake and grabbed her pack.
One thing  was for sure, she was not going to be joining
this little camping trio  after all. Time to move on, and
either find a way to relax, or beam back to  the ship and
get some work done. . .

"Captain?" Tom's voice, two feet from her, caused her to
jump. She turned, her eyes wide, to see him standing on the
path in front of her. He had put on a pair of low-slung
shorts, but his hair was still damp and Janeway felt a rush
of moisture between her legs as the picture of him a few
minutes ago came to her mind.

"Oh -- Tom. You startled me. B'Elanna had invited me. . .
that is, I saw you. . . I mean ...oh hell!" She stopped --
unable, for the first time in a long time, to pull the
mantle of 'Captain' around her shoulders.

Tom's cheeks were flushed, but one side of his mouth quirked
in a grin. "To translate, B'Elanna invited you to join us,
you decided to accept the invitation belatedly, arrived at
the scene at an "intimate" time, and were trying to slip
away. Did I get it right?"

Janeway chuckled -- "You've got it exactly right. Except for
the apology; I didn't mean to intrude."

Tom shook his head, and took the pack from her hand. "You're
not intruding, Captain. B'Elanna's invitation was sincere. .
. and from all of us.Won't you join us -- at least for
something to eat?" The invitation was made easily, and with
the trademark Paris grin. . . the one that said "this isn't
important to me". But Janeway, as always, saw through that,
and saw that he really wanted her to join them. With that
knowledge, her embarrassment crumbled.

"As long as you're sure it wouldn't be an imposition, I'd
love to."

He grinned at her, and they made their way through the trees
to a  clearing where B'Elanna and Harry were bent over a
fire. "Look who I found skulking in the woods."

Without thought, Janeway turned and smacked him on the
shoulder.  "I was not skulking. Captains don't skulk." She
turned back to the two at the fire. "B'Elanna -- I hope your
invitation is still open."

Torres stood and walked over to Janeway. "Of course the
invitation is still open. And you're just in time for dinner
-- compliments of Harry."

Before long, Janeway's belongings were stowed and she was
seated  near the fire with a mug of Thalosian beer in one
hand, and a bowl of stew in the other. Throughout this
process, Tom had kept the conversation  running. . . teasing
Harry about his domestic side, (and B'Elanna about her lack
thereof), bragging about his success in finding the fruit
that complimented their meal, and drawing Janeway into the
camaraderie so smoothly that before she knew it, she was
joking and laughing with the others - all awkwardness
forgotten.

B'Elanna took a spoonful of stew and sighed in utter
contentment. "Harry, when we get back to the ship, you have
to teach Neelix how to make this."

Harry saluted her with his spoon. "I will, but you know
he'll insist on spicing it up, or adding a touch of. . ." ".
. . leola root!" they all finished the sentence for him.

"How much of that stuff do you suppose he gathered?" Tom
queried. "We've been eating it for years and there's always
more in the storeroom."

Janeway shook her head ruefully. "You know, a little leola
root  goes a long way. According to Neelix, there's enough
to last for the next decade or so." After a moment of
appalled silence, B'Elanna shook her head.

"Well I for one am not going to think about leola root for
the  rest of this leave." Turning to Tom she asked, "Are you
and Harry still going up the mountain tomorrow?" At
Janeway's questioning look, she explained. "Tom has been
dying to climb that small mountain by the lake -- he insists
that the view will be worth the climb."

Tom nodded -- "I think that when we get to the top we'll be
able to see the stars and both moons - in the sky and on the
lake. It should really be something. Captain, would you like
to join us?"

Janeway shook her head. "No, I think I'll stay here and
enjoy the lake; climbing a mountain doesn't hold any appeal
for me. I'm feeling a bit lazy"

"Same here," B'Elanna agreed. "Must be a guy thing --
they've been enthusing about it all day. You might as well
go and get it over with - - you can tell us what we missed
when you get back."


The rest of the evening passed in a similar vein -- with
lighthearted chatter, and tall tales. By the time everyone
was ready to turn in, Tom had regaled them with stories of
his wild youth, B'Elanna and Harry had told a series of
jokes. . . each one worse than the last, and Janeway had
listened and laughed and felt more relaxed than she could
recall feeling in months -- maybe years. In the process,
having decided "Captain" was too formal and "Kathryn" too
intimate, the trio had settled upon calling her 'KJ'. She
had never been one for nicknames, but somehow, this one
suited. She set up her mattress on the other side of the
camp (and put up with the ribbing from the others who called
her "soft" for bringing it), and was asleep moments after
her head hit the pillow.

---

A log fell off of the pile in the fire, and the crash and
ensuing sparks brought her awake with a start. Realizing
what she had heard, she turned to settle more comfortably
into the blankets when she became aware of the sounds on the
other side of the camp. The soft moans and sighs could only
have one origin, and though Janeway resolutely clenched her
eyes tight and tried to will herself back to sleep, her
imagination put pictures to those sounds. But it was the
whisper carried across the breeze "Oh god, how I love you. .
. " that was her undoing. Janeway lay listening to the
sounds, thought of loves now far away, and felt terribly
alone.

---

She awoke as the sky began to lighten. Stretching
luxuriously, she felt a soft breeze play across her
shoulders and her eyes flew open as she remembered the
events of the night before. She had finally drifted off to
sleep but the whispers and sounds of lovemaking had become a
part of her dreams. Her blankets were damp with her
perspiration, and the dew of a summer morning. She rolled
over and looked over to the other side of the campsite. She
could make out two forms -- Tom and B'Elanna -- but there
was no sign of Harry. Slipping out of bed, she grabbed swim
clothes and headed towards the lake to enjoy the sunrise and
take a swim bath in the clear water.

When she arrived, after a quick moment to change, she found
Harry  already seated on a rock gazing at the horizon. At
the sound of her step, he turned and smiled, gesturing to a
place beside him. Without disturbing the silence, she took
her seat and they watched the spectacle of the sunrise --
always beautiful no matter what the planet. As the soft
colors faded and the sun's warmth fell over them, Janeway
said, "I love this time of the day - when everything is just
beginning."

Harry nodded, "I know what you mean. Tom and B'Elanna will
sleep until noon if we let them; I keep telling them they're
missing the best part of the day."

Gesturing towards a thermos he said, "I brought coffee to
start  the morning --would you like to start with that, or a
swim?"

"A swim, I think -- I'm feeling a little sticky." Blushing
slightly at the remembrance of why she was sweaty, Janeway
ran down to the edge of the lake and plunged into the
still-cool water.

Janeway was a powerful swimmer, but soon, Harry had caught
up to her.  Side by side, their arms sliced through the
water in an informal race  towards the opposite shore. When
they reached the other side, Janeway was  ahead -- but only
by a stroke. Standing in the waist-deep water, she caught
her breath - then turned to Harry.

"You're not even breathing hard, you wretch. If you're going
to 'kiss up' and let the Captain win, you'll have to be a
better actor than that!"

Harry grinned over at her; "I'll have to remember that for
next time. But meanwhile, we're over here, and the coffee's
w-a-a-y over there ..." then he laughed at Janeway's look of
dismay. Unable to resist, he needled further. "Shall we race
back, or take it more slowly?"

Splashing the smug look off of his face, Kathryn turned and
headed in  a slow crawl back to the other side. Harry,
swimming beside her, said nothing until they had almost
reached the opposite shore. Then he reached over and snagged
her foot, pulling her underwater. As Janeway came up
sputtering, he was running through knee-deep water to the
beach. Looking back over his shoulder, he laughed at her
expression.

"That's pay-back for splashing me. I don't get mad, I get
even."

Janeway couldn't help but laugh in response as she walked
out of the lake. Twisting the water from her hair, she
stalked towards him, but the threat died on her lips as she
saw the cup of steaming coffee he held out like a truce
flag. Taking it out of his hand she said, "Fine. I guess you
won't be the oldest living Ensign in the Fleet when we get
back after all!"

He chuckled along with her and they settled back down on the
rock.  After a minute though, he turned to her with a
serious expression. "Captain?" At her quick look he amended,
"KJ -- it suits you. Anyway. . . do you really still think
we'll be getting home soon?" She started to give him the pat
answer -- the one she'd been giving out to the crew every
time the question was asked. But it didn't come out that way
-- it couldn't if she was being honest.

"Frankly, no. But if you tell anyone I said so. . . I'll
deny it." He looked back at her with comprehension - and a
wisdom that she hadn't thought he'd grow into for a couple
more years.

"Not on your life. I'll leave that little announcement to
you. Though to be honest Cap..... KJ, I think that most of
the crew has caught onto that for themselves. They're
building lives on the ship, marrying, creating families. I
mean, look at Tom, B'Elanna and I. If anyone had told me a
year ago ...." he shook his head ruefully. "But we've been
gone a long time now. . . I'm a different person from the
guy who left Earth on his first mission."

Kathryn chuckled. "Absolutely. You were so green. . . but
adorable."

Harry laughed. "Well, not green anymore, but hopefully,
still adorable."

Janeway touched his hand. "Absolutely -- and one of my
finest officers. I hope I say that to you enough; I know I
can count on you Harry -- that means a lot."

He ducked his head with a bit of the old shyness, then stood
and  extended a hand to her. "Well, KJ -- shall we go rouse
those lazy partners  of mine? Can't let them sleep the day
away!"

And the two walked back to the campsite to sound reveille.

---

Tom and Harry spent most of the morning packing for their
trip up the mountain - - arguing good naturedly about what
to take and who would carry the heaviest pack. They would be
gone overnight so as to catch a view that Tom was sure would
be spectacular.

"It'd better be, " Harry grumbled -- though it was obviously
just for effect. He was obviously just as ready for the
challenge as Tom and finally, after a quick lunch and kisses
and hugs to B'Elanna, they were off. Janeway had never
thought of either man as much of a nature- lover, and said
as much to B'Elanna as the two women shared a much quieter
campfire that evening.

"Nature lovers? Oh, not really. I think it's the challenge
of the mountain -- as well as the chance to spend some time
alone."

Janeway was surprised. "And that doesn't bother you?"

B'Elanna shook her head. "Not at all. Well ..... to be
honest, maybe at first. But it's probably also why our
relationship works as well as it does. We all have times
when we need to be alone -- and times when we need someone
else. Since there are three of us, we can usually get
exactly what we're after at any given time."

Janeway put her cup down and turned to the other woman.
"B'Elanna, I hope you don't mind my asking, but how did the
three of you get together?"

Torres shook her head with a small smile. "Sometimes I can't
believe it myself; it was just one of those quirks of fate
that sometimes works out for the best. Do you remember when
Tom pretended to leave Voyager so he could retrieve
technology from Seska?"

Janeway remembered -- very vividly. That incident had been
the source  of her first major conflict with Chakotay. Once
Tom had been brought back safely, they had had the first of
several verbal battles over his role on the ship. . .

"Come in". Janeway looked up as Chakotay walked into her
ready room and waited until the doors closed behind him.
Then, with his  mouth tight with anger, he walked towards
her desk and, removing both his communicator pin and rank
badge, he set them down in front of her.

"Captain, I'm resigning my position as First Officer
effective immediately."

For a moment she sat stunned, not able to believe that this
was the  same man, the same officer who had fit himself so
seamlessly into her  command style. When she spoke, her
voice reflected her amazement.  "Commander? If this is about
Tom Paris. . ."

"Permission to speak freely, Captain?" Even in his anger,
Chakotay held to the protocol he knew she valued and waited
for her assent before he exploded. "Of course this is about
Tom Paris, and it's about Tuvok, and it's about you and your
secrets." She tried to say something about needing him to
react. . . needing him to believe. . .

"Bullshit, Captain. This isn't about reacting, or about
needing a fight with Paris. This is about trust -- the trust
that a Captain must have for her First Officer. You didn't
trust my responses in this situation. . . or Tuvok didn't
and you listened to him. If we can't believe in each other
implicitly, then we can't work together, and this ship isn't
going to make it with us as the command team." He put both
hands flat on her desk and leaned over glaring at her.

"I've done everything I can to gain your trust; I've backed
you on every decision you've made - whether I agreed in
private or not. But it's time for you to make a decision --
either I'm your First Officer in truth, or Tuvok is and I'll
go join Neelix in the mess hall."


Janeway shook her head ruefully at the memories. It had
taken a long time to calm Chakotay that day, and an even
longer time to realize that he had been right - and she had
been wrong. But since that afternoon when she had finally
convinced him to put the badge back on, they had continued
to disagree occasionally, but had done so while building a
relationship of trust and respect. . . with occasionally,
the glimpse that it could be something more. Now, she caught
B'Elanna's eye and shook her head in an apology for
wool-gathering.

The younger woman smiled, "That mission was a pivotal one in
many ways, wasn't it? For Harry and I, it was the chance to
realize how much we cared about Tom, and how much his
leaving was going to hurt....."


Torres strode through the corridor and into the mess hall.
Across the room, Harry Kim gave a half-hearted wave towards
the empty chair at his table. B'Elanna grabbed a plate and
allowed Neelix to fill it with

". . . the most indescribable taste, Lieutenant, and the
most succulent young vines in the salad.. . ." and she
nodded and murmured that it looked great. . . wondering why
Neelix' food was always in colors most likely to induce
nausea. She walked over and dropped down in the chair across
from Harry and gestured at his plate.

"So. . . is it edible?"

"Barely," he grimaced. "I was fine until I stopped to  taste
it -- don't make the same mistake."

She shook her head in agreement and said "Thanks -- I
won't."

While she ate, B'Elanna stole glances at the young ensign.
Harry looked miserable. Ever since Tom had left Voyager (had
it really only been a couple of days?) he had looked dazed.
Even now, her few attempts to start a conversation were met
with half-hearted replies, and she finally gave up and
finished her meal in silence. Finally, she laid her fork on
her plate and sighed. "Well, the delights of the food were
only enhanced by your scintillating company."

"Huh?" Harry looked at her. . . then grinned sheepishly.
"Sorry, B'Elanna. I just can't seem to get it together
since. . .  since Tom left." One hand clenched into a fist
and he burst  out, "I thought we were friends, you know? We
spent so damn much time together -- I told him everything -
I thought he did too. I never knew he was so unhappy, and
then everything fell apart so fast. And now. . . with almost
no warning. . . he's gone. Just like that." He looked at
her, and she saw despair in his eyes. "Gods, B'Elanna. What
am I going to do without him?"

Ignoring the curious eyes that were glancing at their table,
she  covered his hand with her own. "I don't really know
Harry. But if you come up with something that helps, let me
know, huh?" And he, startled, looked into her eyes and saw
the echo of his own tears.

Unwilling to provide further grist for the rumor mill, she
grabbed her plate and stood up. "C'mon, Starfleet, let's get
out of here." And they took their plates to the disposer,
and headed to the only place she could think to go --
Sandrine's.

---

Much later that night, the two took a slightly weaving path
towards B'Elanna's quarters. Sandrine's had helped a little
-- at least there was a place to drink and reminisce. . .
and synthehol to dull the pain. But they had run out of Tom
stories, and others were waiting for the holodeck.

So Torres had decided to call it a night and Harry,
unwilling to be  alone with his thoughts, went along with
her. When they reached her door, B'Elanna turned to him to
ask, "Coming in?" and then proceeded inside without waiting
for his answer. At the sound of the door closing, she turned
and stepped -- right into his arms. Arms which closed around
her before she could apologize. . . and as she looked up at
his face, his mouth came down on hers in a rush. . . and the
time for talking was finished.

Their lovemaking that night was part mourning - part
celebration.

Janeway listened to B'Elanna and remembered those weeks when
Tom  was away -- how hard it was to listen to talk of him
being a traitor, how frightened she was for him when they
heard of his capture, how relieved and proud she was when
they finally brought him home. She brought herself back to
B'Elanna's story in time to hear her say. . .

"For the next few weeks, we spent a lot of time together.
Harry's a very gentle soul. . . and I learned how to be
gentle myself. He's passionate, creative, bright, terribly
funny, and a great mimic. You should see him imitate you. .
. " at Kathryn's startled look ". . .  well, maybe not." And
they both laughed.

Janeway, intrigued even though she knew the end of the
story, said, "So what happened when Tom did get back? Wasn't
that awkward?"

B'Elanna nodded, "Terribly. You see, by that time, we knew
how good we were together, and yet. . . there was Tom and
how we both felt about him. He knew we were lovers, of
course. Without our having to tell him. He tried to keep it
from being awkward, but things weren't - quite - right
between all of us. Finally, a few nights after he got back,
Harry and I decided to meet him at Sandrine's....."


B'Elanna could actually hear Harry swallow as he stood with
her in front of the holodeck doors. Stroking his hand with
her finger she said, "Buck up, Starfleet. We'll get through
this somehow." He looked down at her with a ghost of his
usual open smile.

"Yeah, I know. But it's the 'somehow' that's got  me
worried." With a shrug, she walked into the bar -- Harry
trailing.

At this time of night, there were no other crew members at
the small tables scattered about; no one playing pool or
queuing up at the bar. Paris sat on one of the tall stools,
absently staring into a glass of synthetic ale. When he saw
them, he summoned up a smile and called out to the
holographic bartender. "Two more, for my friends. My two
good friends who love me so much, that my absence helped
them discover each other."

B'Elanna reached for his arm, "Tom, don't. . ." but he
shrugged it off.

"No, B'Ela -- I'm sorry. I am happy for you both, really.
It's just that. . . ah hell. I spent all that time out there
wondering if I was going to make it safely back. . .
wondering if I'd see you guys again. Now that I'm back,
things are  different. . . maybe it would've been better if
I'd died out  there. . ."

"No!" With a hoarse cry, Harry moved to Tom's other side
and grabbed him hard. "Don't you ever say that, don't you
ever think that!! We were lost without you here -- don't you
know that? Even after we. . . . even together. . .  Tom, we
took turns crying ourselves to sleep. And now you're here
and we're not letting you go. . . we're just going to have
to work this out."

Tom looked at Harry - the shock of the other man's caring
was plain on his face. Slowly, with disbelief, Tom slid his
arms up Harry's and buried his face in the other man's neck.
Harry, for his part, wrapped his arms even tighter and
dragged Tom's head around until - without thought - they
were kissing deeply. B'Elanna moved up behind Tom wrapping
her arms around them both, and stroked her hands over each
and both of them. For a long time, the only sounds in the
bar were the smoky jazz from the trio in the corner, and the
squeaking of the bar stool as it rocked back and forth.
Finally, Tom raised his head to look at his friends with
eyes that were suspiciously wet.

"So. . . what are we gonna do now?"

Harry flashed a smile at B'Elanna over Tom's shoulder.
"Well. . .  our thought is that if two of us are good, then
three of us  could be even better."

Tom stared into Harry's eyes, then back at B'Elanna -- for
once, completely without words.

B'Elanna gave him a feral grin. "So, what do you think
Blondie -- ready to discover a new ending to your old joke
about how to satisfy a Klingon female?"

And Tom smiled - then threw back his head and laughed as the
three of  them left the bar.


"So -- that's about it. We've had our ups and downs, and I
wouldn't recommend it for everyone, but it works for us" A
slight pause. "I'm glad you joined us for this leave. I've
wanted. . . we've been wanting to talk to you about it but.
. . oh hell, this is awkward!"

Janeway chuckled. "I have to admit, I was a little startled
- at first. I haven't known anyone who opted for a
relationship with two others before; I always found it to be
difficult enough with one. But the three of you seem. . .
right. . . together, and you've certainly earned your
happiness."

Janeway reached over and gave B'Elanna a quick hug. "I'm
happy for all of you. . . congratulations."

B'Elanna returned the hug - hard. "Your acceptance means a
lot. We are happy -- and believe me, no one is more
surprised at that than I am."

They were quiet again, contented to listen to the sounds of
the night. B'Elanna watched the light play over Kathryn's
face, her eyes reflecting the flames, a tendril of hair
which had escaped the long braid curled over one cheek, the
way she sat with her cup in both hands, the rim just
touching her bottom lip.

"Gods, you're beautiful", she thought - then every muscle in
her body tensed as she realized she had spoken out loud.

Kathryn turned to look at her - eyes wide with surprise.
"What  did you ..." she started, then held up a hand, "No,
belay that.  . . I don't need it repeated."

B'Elanna could see the tension in Janeway's body, and for a
moment, she cursed herself for breaking the easy camaraderie
that had been between them. Then, with a Tom-like shrug, she
turned to face the other woman. "What .. one compliment and
the Captain returns?"

Janeway's mouth twitched, and she relaxed again. "Sorry,
you're right. I just wasn't expecting that ...." Janeway
broke off - a flush on her cheeks.

"Wouldn't expect that I would find you attractive, or
wouldn't expect that I'd admit it?"

Janeway's mouth opened for a moment, but nothing came out.
Then  with a small chuckle, she put her cup down. "B'Elanna,
you are  the gutsiest person I've ever met! And to answer
your question, I wouldn't have expected either one." Janeway
made as if to stand. . . to put some distance between them -
and get away from this conversation which had grown
uncomfortably intimate.

B'Elanna never knew where the courage for her next impulse
came, but she reached out and grabbed Kathryn's shoulder --
holding her in place. With the fingers of her free hand, she
stroked a caress down the side of Kathryn's face .. ending
with her fingers resting just under the bottom lip. "You are
a beautiful woman Kathryn Janeway. You're smart, funny,
arrogant as hell, and the best commander I've ever served
with -- or ever thought of serving with. And if you don't
stop me right now, I'm going to give into the impulse of a
thousand daydreams and kiss you."

Kathryn stared at the younger woman - shock, fear, and yes,
desire  holding her frozen. This wasn't right - she was the
captain, and B'Elanna was a member of her crew. She
shouldn't be sitting here, eyes tracing the fullness of the
younger woman's mouth, ears feeling the pounding of her
heart, and the heat between her legs an instant response.
She should stand up now, find another campsite, beam back to
the ship. Instead, her eyes closed slowly, and her mouth met
B'Elanna's half way, her hand cupping B'Elanna's face in a
mirror of the hand cupping her own. How could she have
forgotten the feel of another mouth on her own, the hot, wet
heat of tongues and breaths mingling?

Somehow, the one kiss turned into a shower of kisses, and
they tumbled together to the soft ground - arms and legs
intertwining. Hands caressed her back -- tangled in her
hair. B'Elanna was whispering between kisses. . . and
Kathryn was almost lost in a flood of desire. Almost ...
almost she was swept out of reason. Almost, she allowed
herself to return the caresses in full measure. But finally,
reluctantly, she pulled her mouth from the other woman's and
rolled over on her back -- taking B'Elanna with her.

When B'Elanna would have recaptured her mouth, Kathryn
pulled her  head to her shoulder -- stroking her hair and
quieting her like a small child. "We can't do this,
B'Elanna."

Torres raised herself up to stare into Kathryn's face, then
smiled at her. "Give me one good reason why not -- KJ", and
she lowered herself until their breasts brushed together.

Janeway groaned softly -- "You don't play fair, young
woman."

B'Elanna flashed another Tom-grin, "Those who play fair
rarely win. And besides, you still haven't given me a
reason," and she lowered her face for another kiss.

Janeway caught her head between two hands and held her, a
tinge of  anger in her voice. "Because I am the captain of
your ship, damn you,  and captains don't have sex with their
crew."

B'Elanna easily moved out of Janeway's hold, and dropped
another light kiss on her lips. "Why not?" she asked,
pulling back to look into Kathryn's face.

"Because. . ." Janeway stopped. She knew there were dozens
of good reasons for this tradition. . . but at that moment
she couldn't think of one.

B'Elanna waited for an answer and, when none was
forthcoming, rolled off of Kathryn and pulled her to a
sitting position. Holding both of Janeway's hands firmly in
hers, she said, "Kathryn Janeway, I find you terribly
attractive. That doesn't change the fact that you are my
captain and, I hope, my friend. I followed your orders
yesterday, and I will follow them tomorrow -- and I know
you'll be giving them. But right now, we're on leave, it's a
beautiful night, and neither one of us can think of a good
reason not to make love." She stopped for a moment, then
gave a small laugh. "Besides, who are you planning on having
sex with if not a member of the crew? Somehow, I don't think
that either the Kazons or the Vidiians are your type. . . "

Janeway couldn't help it -- she laughed aloud. Cullah in her
bed? She shook her head quickly to lose that image. Then,
"But what about Harry and Tom?"

B'Elanna's eyes twinkled, "Well, if they get back before we
wear out, they'll want to join us. We had a discussion once
about possible 'extra' partners, and you were at the top of
the list!"

Janeway laughed again, even as her cheeks grew hot at the
thought -- whether from embarrassment or excitement she
wouldn't admit - even to herself. She looked over at Torres.
. . amazed again at the risks the woman had taken in the
past few minutes. After all of that, Janeway owed her an
honest response. Leaning slowly towards her, Kathryn brushed
soft cheek against soft cheek, then moved close to
B'Elanna's ear and traced it softly with her tongue. "I may
regret this -- but right now, I can't imagine saying no."
And catching the lobe between her teeth, she bit down -
hard.

B'Elanna groaned as the last rational thought left her
brain. Kathryn's hands moved to the sides of her head --
clamping over her ears, so she could hear no external
sounds. The pounding of her heart mingled with the sounds of
her ragged breathing, and Kathryn's mouth was ravaging her
own.

The hands moved away from her ears and through her hair --
pulling her head back. Kathryn's lips, teeth and tongue were
tracing a trail along her jaw, and down her neck. B'Elanna
leaned backwards -- pulling Kathryn with her until they were
once again lying on the ground -- B'Elanna on her back and
Kathryn on top. Kathryn pulled back slightly to imitate
B'Elanna's earlier move -- brushing breast against breast.
The pressure between B'Elanna's legs was so strong it was
almost painful. . . she clenched her hands into fists to
keep from flipping Kathryn over and grinding against her.

Kathryn's hands moved to the fastenings of B'Elanna's shirt
-- lips nibbling on the flesh that was revealed as the
material parted. B'Elanna sat up slightly to help pull the
material off, then lay back to enjoy the caresses. Janeway
stared down at the body revealed in the firelight --
B'Elanna's full breasts. . . the nipples tight with desire.
Suddenly needing the feeling of bare skin against bare skin,
Kathryn sat up and pulled off her own shirt, then slowly
lowered herself down until they lay completely against each
other. B'Elanna's legs were wrapped around her -- one foot
caressing her backside. Kathryn could not stay still, but
moved hands up and down B'Elanna's body -- planting kisses
everywhere except on those nipples. Finally, Torres could
stand it no longer and pulled Kathryn's mouth to her breast,
groaning as she fastened onto it -- sucking greedily.
Kathryn's other hand moved to the other breast, molding and
stroking it -- then switching sides so that B'Elanna was
awash in sensation. When Kathryn's hands moved to the
fastening of her pants, B'Elanna stopped her.

"My turn," she growled and pulled Kathryn's mouth back to
hers and rolling them both over.

Janeway was wild with need by the time B'Elanna had lavished
attention on each breast, and covered her upper body with
kisses. Finally, when she thought she'd scream with
frustration B'Elanna moved along her side, and slipping her
hands under the waistband, pulled her slacks down and off.
Divesting herself of the rest of her own clothes, B'Elanna
lay against Kathryn's side and kissed her. She drew one hand
slowly up Kathryn's thigh, then stroked between her legs.
Kathryn cried out into B'Elanna's mouth, and the sound of
that cry combined with the incredibly hot slick feeling
between Kathryn's legs drove the last of B'Elanna's control
from her. She straddled Kathryn's thigh, moving against her
in a rhythm that matched the strokes of her hand. Kathryn
thrashed beneath her - breathing in short gasps. She could
feel Kathryn's muscles beginning to contract, and she slid
her fingers inside, using her thumb to continue stroking.

As Janeway began to stiffen and cry out, Torres looked down
into her flushed face, and slowed her own rhythm to watch.
Janeway's insides were contracting against her fingers, her
face was flushed, and her cries mingled with the sounds of
the night.

Kathryn came down from a powerful climax to see B'Elanna's
face above hers -- eyes wide, breath coming in quick gasps.
Wanting - no, needing to bring her some of the same
pleasures she had felt, she rolled them over once more. As
B'Elanna's began to protest, Janeway closed off the words
with her mouth, then curled over her, slipping two fingers
inside B'Elanna, and stroking her with a thumb. Now it was
B'Elanna's turn to scream into a warm mouth. . . conscious
not only of the perfection of the touch, but also of the
identity of her lover. Janeway's hands on her - in her -
Janeway's mouth and tongue tangling with hers. She spiraled
higher, concentration narrowing to that. . . one. . . place.
. . then writhed and shuddered in her own orgasm.

Firelight played over their intertwined forms as B'Elanna
lay stroking Kathryn's skin - not daring to break the mood
with words. Janeway, for her part, had come back to reality
-- hard. Her internal voice was raging, "Oh god, what have I
done?" - even while she continued to revel in the gentle
caresses, the feeling of warm body against her own. . . how
she had missed these feelings. Finally, she raised herself
up on one elbow and forced herself to meet B'Elanna's eyes.

"We shouldn't have done that," she whispered, softening the
words with a kiss.

"No, probably not," B'Elanna agreed. "But  wasn't it fun?"

And Janeway chuckled - and the next minute they were
laughing together  -- all thoughts of regret cast off into
the night.

"KJ, you've done this before - with a woman, I mean?"

Janeway nodded. "When I was about your age, I was very much
in  love with another woman. She chose to end the
relationship -- needing to  focus all her energy on her
career." Janeway was silent for a time, remembering her own
pain - not understanding why the two passions couldn't
coexist. Now, older and wiser, she resolved that if her
former lover was still alive when they got back to the Alpha
Quadrant, she would look her up and tell her that now she
understood the fears. Although, knowing how far the
passionate woman she had loved had been buried in the
persona of Admiral Necheyev, she still thought the choice to
eschew love - in whatever form - had been too high a price
to pay for that success.

Janeway came back to the present with a shake of her head.
"Anyway, my lovers since then have been male -- and there
haven't been many at that. I've never been one for empty
sex."

B'Elanna smiled warmly and kissed her. "Then, I'm doubly
gratified that you're here with me now." Running her hands
lightly up Janeway's sides she queried, "Are you too tired
for another round?"

Janeway laughed. "Oh, I think that there's an energy cell or
two left. . ." and began some explorations of her own.


It was several hours later when Janeway was awakened by a
warm body sliding in behind her. Strong hands ran up her
sides and grasped her breasts, and a mouth settled on the
curve of her neck. She groaned in response, and pulled the
body in front of her closer. . . and came suddenly wide
awake realizing where she was. She and B'Elanna had wrapped
themselves up in blankets and each other and had crashed
into a deep sleep. B'Elanna was still in her arms, and the
form behind her was definitely male. As all of this was
coalescing in her sleep-fogged brain, the hands on her body
stilled, and an uncertain voice whispered, "umm. . .
B'Elanna??"

She shook her head against his chest and stifled a giggle as
the hands  and body were abruptly withdrawn with a moaned. .
. "Ohhhh  shit."

She turned and grabbed Tom Paris' arm before he could leap
up from the blankets -- her own sense of the absurd allowing
her to see the humor in the situation. Whispering to avoid
waking B'Elanna, "It's okay Tom -- an honest mistake. And. .
. a pleasurable one, I might add."

Tom froze -- this was a side of the Captain he had seen only
rarely  ... with the gigolo at Sandrine's, or with comments
directed at Chakotay. But when she neither became indignant
or left the warmth of the blanket, he allowed his muscles to
relax. Finally, he dared, "So. . . you and B'Elanna got
along okay without us?"

Janeway laughed softly. "I guess you could say that -- it
seems command protocols have truly gone to hell on this
trip." She reached over to touch his arm, "You don't mind?"

"Hell no, didn't B'Elanna tell you about The List?"

Janeway shook her head, then realizing that he probably
couldn't see her said, "She mentioned something about extra
partners, but I had other things on my mind at the time."

He chuckled, "I'll bet. It's like this. When we began
talking about making our relationship a permanent one, the
question of fidelity came up. We decided that, for the most
part, we would be very happy with each other. But there were
a few people who we had all fantasized about - we decided
that if by some miracle they ever fell into our arms, we
would be free to indulge. You were at the top of the list."

Janeway caught her breath - then forced herself to breath
normally. "I don't know whether to be flattered or
appalled."

Tom touched her briefly -- "Oh, be flattered, definitely.
You  were the only one on the ship to make all three lists."

Janeway started to reply, when Tom said, "I think I hear
Harry.  He stopped at the lake for a quick swim - let's see
what he does."

Janeway felt absurdly like a child at a sleep over playing
tricks on  her friends, but she obligingly curled herself
back around B'Elanna and lay still. Harry's soft footfalls
came closer, then the blanket lifted on the other side of
B'Elanna and he settled in. As he put his arm around her,
his hand encountered Janeway's waist, and stilled. Then, in
a quiet voice, Harry said, "You owe me two days replicator
rations, Paris, " and with a "Goodnight KJ," and he quickly
fell off to sleep.

"Well, I'll be damned," Tom said softly, then the blanket
rustled as he sat up. I'm going to take a swim -- and I hope
the lake's v-e-r-y cold. Unless. . ." he swallowed,
"...unless you'd like to join me?"

Janeway spared a moment to think, then her mother's voice
came into her head, "In for a penny, in for a pound. . ."
and she sat up and said, "Oh why not -- I'm not going to get
back to sleep anytime either." And tucking the blankets
around B'Elanna, she followed Tom away from the campsite.

The path through the trees was laced with shadows, and her
feet made  faint depressions in the soft earth. She hadn't
bothered to dress -- counting on the dark night to shield
her from Tom's eyes. But as she watched him walk ahead of
her, the shafts of moonlight that penetrated the trees
revealed his form, and she knew he was taking the same
advantage of the light that he was. . . catching glimpses of
muscles and satin skin and finding the sight immensely
pleasurable.

When they reached the edge of the lake, the light from the
twin moons bathed everything in a bright silver glow. The
water lapping at her ankles was cool, but not at all cold
enough to quench her re-awakened desire -- or his. The
breeze caressed her softly, and tendrils of her hair danced
around her face and touched her breasts. She made an effort
to control her breathing, to keep it steady and slow, but
she knew it was a losing battle.

They moved into the water together. . . slicing through the
moon- soaked depths with silent strokes. Phosphorescence
played about their limbs,  and Kathryn cupped the water and
held it high over Tom's head .... allowing the tiny lights
to dance around his face. His hands stroked the water around
her body -- never quite reaching her, until she thought that
the almost-touches would drive her mad. She could feel the
heat emanating from him -- and felt its echo inside.
Finally, she could stand the wanting no longer and strokes
her hands lightly up his arms till they rested on his
shoulders. Floating her body towards his she brushed his
lips with her own.

"So, Tom. What shall we do now?" His eyes bore into hers --
shock and desire warring in his expression. She continued,
"It appears that, despite everything I've ever believed
about protocol, I'm enjoying this shore leave with a
vengeance. Now, since this is the only time I'm ever going
to -- how did you put it -- 'fall into your arms', are we
going to indulge, or not?"

With a groan, Tom put an arm around her and another under
her and  floated her over until she was straddling his
stomach. She splayed her hands across his chest as his mouth
came down on hers and his hands tangled in her hair. She
felt his erection pressing up between their stomachs, and
felt her insides melt in response. The heat of their bodies
warmed the swirling water around them, and Janeway groaned
with the intensity of the mingled sensations. Her body, long
denied sexual release, seemed to be making up for the lack
tonight, and her skin tingled as his hands and his mouth
were everywhere -- exploring and tasting her.

Somehow, he got them both to the shore where they lay across
the wet  sand, pressed full length against each other. His
hand stroked between her  legs, his mouth trailing kisses
across her breasts and down her stomach.  When his mouth
arrived at the curls between her legs and paused, she moaned
her encouragement - - reaching blindly for his hair as she
raised her hips  in supplication.

He needed no further urging, and suddenly his hot mouth was
on her -- tasting her fully. Kathryn rubbed herself
frantically against his mouth -- lost in the sensations. . .
feelings that she had thought satiated just a few short
hours ago once again in full need. Wanting him inside her
she reached down -- tugging at his arms, pulling him up her
length. His mouth reached hers and she tasted her juices on
his mouth as he drove into her.

Their rhythms matched quickly. . . and everything whited out
except  the feeling of him inside her, the feeling of mouths
and breaths hot on  skin, hands gripping and holding, and
the sounds of their passion lost in  the movement of water
lapping at their feet.


It had been late when Tom and Kathryn got back to the
campsite and fell asleep, yet her habit of rising early
wasn't affected by the lack of sleep. Soon after sunrise she
awoke and felt rather than saw that someone else was awake,
and turned to find her face about six inches away from
Harry's open eyes. He smiled at her then mouthed,
"Coffee??", and at her nod, he slipped out of the blankets
and headed towards the replicator.

Janeway pulled on a shirt before joining him and gratefully
accepted  the cup of strong brew. Still without speaking,
Harry took her other hand,  and they strolled away from the
campsite and headed back over to the lake.

"We missed the sunrise," Janeway said as they settled
themselves on 'their' rock.

"Well, we were all up pretty late last night -- you and Tom
especially. . ." and he looked over at her and winked.

Janeway refused to acknowledge the blush on her cheeks and
winked  right back. "I didn't think you were asleep that
quickly. B'Elanna on the other hand. . ."

Harry laughed. "B'Ela can sleep through everything short of
a red alert. It's amazing what Tom and I can do without her
stirring. . . " and then it was his turn to blush.

Janeway laughed -- he really was adorable. He settled
himself more comfortably and held out an arm - an invitation
for her to snuggle in. Without hesitation, she did so -- his
chest was a far more comfortable backrest than the rock. In
companionable silence, they finished their coffee.

Finally, Kathryn sighed. "I could get used to this, you
know. Oh  -- not with the three of you, of course, but. . ."
her voice trailed off.

Harry's lips brushed her hair, and his arm squeezed her
lightly. "It must get very lonely being you."

Janeway closed her eyes tightly at the sudden lump in her
throat. "Most of the time, it's not a problem. I love
command -- Voyager is everything I could ask for in a ship
and crew. But every once in awhile, I think about the rest
of my life without. . . intimacy. Do you understand that I
mean more than just sex?"

Harry nodded, and his hand began stroking her arm. "Of
course I  do. Not that you could believe it from this leave,
but the most important parts of my relationship with
B'Elanna and Tom have nothing to do with the physical stuff.
I've got someone to share the joy when something goes right,
and the frustration when it doesn't. They love me,  KJ. . ."
and his voice was full of wonder ". . . they love  me and
because I know that, I can risk so many other things. . . be
so much  stronger than I am alone." He took a breath as
though to continue,  then stopped.

"Harry?" she gave him tacit permission to continue.

"Well, I was wondering -- what about Commander Chakotay? I
thought for sure that when the two of you were on that
planet that you. . .  that  he. . .  well, I would've. . ."
he shrugged.

Kathryn shook her head ruefully. "That was such a unique
experience, Harry. We thought we'd be there for the rest of
our lives. Yes, we did begin to form a -- a different kind
of relationship. But then we were back on the ship, and our
personal lives had to take a back seat to Voyager. Since
then, we've had our moments. . . but I just don't know if it
could work. And if we tried and it didn't work - oh Harry,
the consequences could be devastating for the ship and the
crew."

Harry sat up suddenly and turned her so she was facing him.
"Why devastating? Are you telling me that you and Chakotay
couldn't handle a 'break up' without jeopardizing your
command and your crew? Because I don't buy that for a
minute. You're not children, and you're both committed to
Voyager." He gazed at her;  determination in his face. "You
want to know what I think? I think  you're scared to try and
you're using the ship as an excuse. I think you know how
much you both could be to each other, and the idea of that
much intimacy scares the hell out of you."

She drew in a sharp breath, wanting to negate what he'd
said. . . knowing she couldn't. Finally admitting defeat,
she raised a hand. . . placing it on his cheek. "Oh Harry
Kim, when did you become so wise?"

He turned his face so he could place a kiss on her palm.
"I'm not that wise, KJ -- I just want everyone I care about
to be as happy as I am."

Her eyes filled as she looked into his face, and as she
closed her  eyes for a kiss, one tear escaped and trailed
down her cheek. He followed  it with his mouth, reclaiming
her mouth in a deep and gentle kiss.

Tom cleared his throat behind them, breaking the mood.
"B'Elanna sent me to get you guys for breakfast. Of course,
I could go back and tell her it's Harry's turn with the
Captain. . ." and he leered suggestively at them.

Harry laughed, holding Kathryn in a tight hug before letting
her go. "No need for that my friend, I had my 'turn' with
the Captain about two years ago. . . " and Janeway and Harry
walked by Tom who was stunned into a momentary silence.


By the time they reached the campsite, Tom had recovered his
voice,  and was barraging Harry with questions. Harry had a
poker face that would  have done a Vulcan credit. . . and it
was all Janeway could do to keep from giggling. She
remembered that night with a nervous Harry Kim -- who was
determined that his "first time" be with someone special.
When Tom wasn't looking, she gave him a quick wink and a
small nod. She wanted him to feel free to share the details
of that night; and knew that he never would have done so
without her consent. However, she also knew that Harry was
enjoying Tom's shock. . . and would probably milk the
suspense for a long time before relenting. B'Elanna for her
part passed out plates of bread and fruit and listened to
the teasing with a fond air. . . somehow Kathryn knew that
this was not the surprise for her that it had been for Tom.

Finally Tom, seeing that he wasn't going to get anything out
of Harry, changed the subject. "So, my compatriots and
gentle guest, how shall we spend the day?"

Harry stretched and said, "Well I for one am going fishing.
After  all of that climbing yesterday, I want to sit and do
nothing."

Tom smirked at him, "What Harry -- too much for you? I'm
going  to explore those caves we saw on the way up. . .
anyone want to join  me?"

B'Elanna's eyes gleamed. "Caves? Now that's an  excursion
I'll sign up for. Join us, KJ?" Kathryn shook her head. "I'm
still feeling lazy; I'll stay around here and catch up on
some reading. But I was wondering -- would anyone else be up
for sleeping by the lake tonight? It's a shame to waste all
of that moonlight. . ."

This got an enthusiastic response from the others, and
everyone  dispersed for the day's pursuits.

---

"This was a great idea. . . it's gorgeous here." Harry
looked up at the sky which was awash with stars. The first
moon was just over the horizon spreading a ribbon of light
across the water towards them, and the second would be
rising soon. They were all gathered on the sandy beach after
having a wonderful dinner; fish that Harry had caught
supplemented with wild mushrooms and greens. For her
contribution, Janeway had treated them to replicated ice
cream -- a perfect end to the meal. The night was a little
warmer than most, and the lack of breeze had concerned Tom
and Harry who were not looking forward to a re-visit from
the mosquitoes they had encountered on the mountain. But
Janeway had pulled the sonic pulsers from her anti-grav
pack, so thanks to her reliance on technology (and
Chakotay's packing advice), they could enjoy the evening
pest-free.

Kathryn lay back on blankets they had spread on the sand and
felt the warmth from the ground seep through to her muscles.
Her hair, still in a stiff braid, poked into her shoulder
blades and she sat up to adjust it.

B'Elanna was suddenly there behind her, "Here -- let me."
The other woman pulled out the band that held the hair and
began combing the braid out with her fingers. When she had
all of the hair free, she began massaging Janeway's scalp
with her nails -- letting the strands of hair fall through
her fingers.

Janeway let out a breath -- "Oh, that feels good. . ." and
closed her eyes giving herself up to the sensation of being
stroked. Another  set of hands surrounded her feet --
massaging slowly up her ankles and  legs. Janeway felt
desire curling in her stomach as she opened her eyes to  see
Harry, intent on his task, look over her body to B'Elanna
who was behind her.

Tom moved to her side and dropped a hand on her thigh.
Leaning close  he murmured, "It looks like it's 'be kind to
Kathryn' time. Any objections?"

His breath, warm on her face, drowned any hesitation she
might have  had and, for an answer, she reached out with her
tongue and licked his  lips.

Tom gasped, then put a finger to her lips, caressing them
gently. Her  lips parted and he reached a finger in to meet
her tongue. His eyes were  warm with desire, and his
breathing quickened along with hers. He moved the finger out
of her mouth, and traced a damp trail down her chin and to
the place where her neck and shoulder met.

B'Elanna pulled Janeway's hair to the side and Tom followed
the finger with soft lips. B'Elanna knelt behind Janeway,
breasts pressed up against her back. B'Elanna's hands
stroked Janeway's  sides and around to her stomach.

Janeway reached up for Tom -- unable to be passive any
longer, but he gripped her hands in his and smiled down at
her.

"Oh no, I think you need to be spoiled just a little longer.
Relax KJ -- let us take over for now."

Janeway groaned in response -- being passive was not her
usual style  in bed. But the it all felt so good. . . and so
she gave herself over to their ministrations. Harry,
meanwhile, had also forsaken hands for lips and was laying
between her feet slowly kissing his way up her body .... one
leg and then the next. The slow pace of the caresses was
driving her wild. . . yet the three seemed intent on taking
their time. Every inch of her body was lavished with lips
and hands -- her skin felt alive and every part of her was
awash in sensation. When she leaned back into B'Elanna, she
could feel soft breasts against her back. Harry alternately
kissed her legs, and then brushed his silky hair along her
feet or thighs. Tom explored her everywhere - removing her
clothes as he went. His kisses and strokes were interspersed
with words of admiration. B'Elanna was sliding her body
along Janeway's back - and taking her share of Tom's kisses.

Finally Harry, having made his way up her reached her mouth
and pulled  her against his length; rolling them over so
Kathryn was on top. Their  kisses were deep and Kathryn
threaded her hands into the silkiness of his  hair, reveling
in the feel of that finally in her hands -- and of his
erection which pulsed between them. She sat up, gripping his
hips with her  thighs. . .  teasing his erection with her
pubis. It was Harry's turn to groan with desire and she
smiled at him in triumph. Tom's hands were everywhere --
undressing Harry with the same skill he had used with her.

B'Elanna moved so that she could continue stroking Janeway's
back - hands sliding up and down her spine. . . trailing
kisses and small bites along her shoulders. Finally, she ran
one finger from the base of Kathryn's neck down to her ass.
As B'Elanna's finger began stroking slowly along and inside
the crack, Janeway cried out at the intensity of her body's
reaction. That cry proved to be a catalyst and suddenly, the
time for slow lovemaking was at an end. Janeway shifted so
that Harry could enter her and, at the same time, B'Elanna's
fingers gently insinuated themselves into her from behind.
Tom leaned over Harry to recapture her mouth and Kathryn's
orgasm slammed into her almost immediately - so intense that
she screamed. Harry deliberately slowed his thrusts so that
he could watch her -- her head thrown back and eyes screwed
shut, and her hair sweeping over all of them like a curtain
in the moonlight.

Kathryn rolled off of Harry -- for the moment, absolutely
spent. When  she was able to open her eyes, she saw that
B'Elanna was now sandwiched between the men, and the three
of them were moving in a frantic rhythm. The men alternated
between kissing B'Elanna and each other, and hands clasped
and released in conjunction with the rhythm of their thrusts
- one in front and one behind. Janeway squeezed her legs
together tightly - aroused again at the sight, and shuddered
in another climax as they cried out -- Harry first, but the
other two following quickly. Harry reached out blindly
towards her, and she crawled over to fall on top of them and
join in kisses and murmurs and caresses; they made love
together until long after both moons were high in the sky.

---

Janeway awoke as a shaft of sunlight hit her eyes, and for a
time she lay still, listening to the breathing of her
bedmates. Three days ago she had been on a virtuous, albeit
sterile shore leave, and now she was tumbled among her
junior officers like one of a heap of sleeping puppies. She
gingerly probed her conscience -- expecting a sharp pang,
but could muster up nothing more than a slight concern. She
just felt too damn good to worry about what would happen
when they all got back on the ship. After all, once their
sojourn on New Earth had ended, she and Chakotay had managed
to regain their working relationship. . . she would be able
to do the same this time. The memories of exactly what had
happened last night flashed into her brain and she knew she
had realized several long-buried fantasies. . . but the most
erotic memory she would carry was the sight of her friends
-- and the intensity of their love.

Harry had been right yesterday, she couldn't run from those
needs forever. The potential rewards were worth the risk of
trying. . . and she resolved that the next shore leave,
Tuvok would have to do less research so that she could find
some time with Chakotay. It was time to let go of some of
her fears and let that relationship develop as it would.

While she had been thinking, she had managed to get up and
replicate coffee and breakfast -- it was her turn to treat.
By the time the others stumbled sleepily back to the
campsite, she was dressed and packed. Handing cups around,
she joined them in the light fare. As the caffeine hit and
Tom began soliciting plans for the day, Kathryn held up a
hand,

"I'm going to be heading back to the ship. . ." and shook
her head as they began to protest. "No, the three of you
deserve some time alone and I. . . I have some thinking to
do ."

B'Elanna started, "Listen, if things went too far last
night. .  ."

Janeway held up a hand to stop her. "On the contrary. This
has  been. . . an important leave for me. I had forgotten
how much I need  someone -special - in my life. I've been so
busy being 'Captain' that I hadn't realized how much of life
I've  closed off. Being with you has reminded me. . ." and
her voice trailed off.

Paris cleared his throat and took her hand. Gazing intently
into her  eyes he said, "Listen, KJ, if you ever need to be
reminded again. . .  I'd be happy to oblige. . ." and ducked
as the others began laughing and throwing bread at him.

Before things could get awkward again, Janeway stood -
brushing the  crumbs off her legs. "I'll go get my gear and
call the ship."

The other three also stood and she looked at them -- amazed
at the  comfort level they had all achieved in such a short
time. She held out her  arms, and suddenly they were all
locked in a hug, holding tightly. She moved  out of the hug
and smiled - eyes bright.

B'Elanna was the first to speak, " Kathryn, thanks for
joining us -- everything was wonderful."

Janeway gave a wicked grin back at them all. "Absolutely.
And. .  . I hope that 'KJ' - even without the everything -
will be welcome at Sandrine's?"

They laughed at her and with her as she gathered her things
and beamed back to the ship. She was still smiling as she
stepped off the transporter and Chakotay, who was there to
meet her, couldn't help but smile back.

"Good leave, Captain?"

"The best, Chakotay. But I'm still technically on leave for
the next 24 hours. . . so maybe you should call me
Kathryn."

And she linked her arm with his and began to fill him in on
the details of her leave. 'Well. . .most of them.'

---

The End