The BLTS Archive - Brighter Shores by Gillian (gill6034@aol.com) --- This story starts during the end of The Black Shore, the novel by Greg Cox. If you haven't read the book yet, I suggest you do. I thought it was very good. As I was reading the book, especially page 238, I felt as if Greg was screaming at me, READ THE SLASH BETWEEN THE LINES because I can't print it. Slash dialogue was going through my mind, it was so there! This is my first slash story. I hope you guys will give me feedback. I kept reading and admiring the works of others, but not until I read The Black Shore did I have a burning desire to write my own slash story. After reading the book, I felt I HAD to write this story. My story starts from page 238 of the novel. I quote from the book. I try to fill in enough info from the book so even if you haven't read it, you will still understand the story. Some of the dialogue is straight from Greg's book. I apologize, Greg, please don't sue me. It's just that a C/P story fits so well in your book. I acknowledge that during the first few pages of my story, most of the quoted dialogue is yours. Again, please don't sue me. I am not profiting from your words, just expanding the story for slash fanfic enjoyment. Paramount owns everything Star Trek, Greg Cox owns the 95% of the dialogue on pages 1-6. I am just borrowing the words and the characters for a little while to write a little story for Trekkies amusement and enjoyment. I am not profiting from the words so please don't sue me. The thoughts of the characters are all mine. This is my first slash story so please tell me what you think. WARNING: This Story contains M/M sex. It is a C/P story so if you are under 18, go ask your parents if you can read this. If they say no, don't read it. If same-sex love bothers you, don't read this and consult a shrink to see why it bothers you so much. --- "Good to see you're still on our side," said Chakotay, after seeing that Tom had betrayed Laazia. He sat there on the Bridge, injured, with his hands tied behind his back. He looked at Paris, lying there next to him, whose back was bloody and infected from the wounds that Laazia had inflicted. As Voyager orbited her planet of Ryol, she had ordered him to land the ship on the surface so that her people could come aboard. Tom had surprised everyone and done the opposite. He had flown Voyager away from Ryol, but kept the long-range sensors on so that on-screen, it looked like they were flying closer to the planet. By the time Tom illustrated his betrayal, they were half a light-year from Ryol. Chakotay thought Paris had shown his true Mercenary colors, once again. The Ryol's were succeeding in commandeering Voyager. There mind-control and energy-sucking powers were proving too much for the Federation species. They had tricked the Voyager crew into believing that they were a friendly race inhabiting a planet much like Risa. Chakotay thought that once Tom realized that the Federation was no match for the Ryol's mind-control and energy-sapping techniques, he betrayed his ship and sold-out to the highest bidder. The Ryols needed a pilot, they would never be able to figure out how to fly the technically complicated ship, and probably offered Paris his life and other gifts as payment. When Tom had walked onto the Bridge with Laazia and her crew and helped her commandeer the ship by raising the Bridge's shields, cutting them off from the rest of the ship (Janeway, Tuvok and Kim were in sickbay talking to the Doc), and taking all of the phasers from crew members and giving them to Laazia's guards, Chakotay felt an anger so strong, so fierce, well up inside of him. That piece of garbage! thought Chakotay. Never had an ounce of loyalty! He looked at the fine golden hair, those penetrating deep-blue eyes and that fine, toned body and felt himself getting a little excited. That infuriated him even more. The fact that he could have any sexual desire towards that traitor irked Chakotay beyond belief. "Oh, come on, " Paris replied. "You didn't really think I'd sell you all down the river for a pretty face and a nice pair of legs," especially when no one is prettier than you, Chakotay, Tom thought to himself. He looked into the deep brown eyes of the sexy, quiet big man and thought about how he could melt into those gentle pools of brown. How he wished the Commander didn't hate him so much. "Well..." Chakotay said. "Okay," Paris admitted. "Maybe I gave you some excuse for jumping to conclusions. Seriously, Commander, you can count on me. I was gone for awhile there, but I am back now, I promise. Laazia's mind-control techniques and energy-sapping powers are quite powerful and debilitating, but when I saw her kill Ensign Tukwila and then use you as a human baseball bat, it snapped me out of it. She underestimated my will against her mind-control. Typical," said Tom with disgust. "Everybody assumes that because I'm a blond, I must be dumb." Including me, thought Chakotay. Although Tom was a good pilot, he always assumed that his Starfleet career had been handed to him on a silver platter and that his grades didn't matter because he was an Admiral's son. To add to this assumption, Tom had never tried to excel in academics. He was satisfied with being a middle-of-the-road student. Chakotay realized that he had a new respect for Tom now and that there was a lot more to the Golden Boy then he gave him credit for. Due to his good looks, Chakotay realized that Tom always got the attention of others. It was so easy for him to give off that careless party-boy attitude and annoy everyone. But maybe he wasn't into his mercenary hired-gun days anymore. Janeway had let Tom redeem himself and maybe holding on to that meant more to Tom than Chakotay had thought. "Silence!" Laazia snarled. "You!" she said, pointing an extended nail at Paris. "You spineless excuse for a male. Tell me how to command this ship!" "Do I look like a Flying Instructor to you?" Paris asked sarcastically. "Why don't you ask the Captain... oh, that's right, you still haven't managed to get your hands on her." Chakotay laughed to himself as Tom's sarcastic statement infuriated the Wolf-woman even more. Although he hated Paris' sarcasm when it was directed at him, he appreciated it now. One of Paris' ways of showing her that she didn't have control of him was to give her that sarcastic retort, knowing, but not caring, that it would enrage her. He worried that she would hurt Tom even more for saying this, but still had to appreciate Tom's Fuck-you attitude. He prayed to the spirits of his ancestors that both he and Tom would get out of this alive. He was going to tell Tom that he viewed him differently now, in a new light. "You know that I will learn whatever I wish eventually. Why not tell me now and spare you and the others so much suffering?" Laazia looked at Chakotay when she said the word others. Oh no, thought Tom. I can't let her hurt Chakotay. Chakotay saw her looking at him and then he looked at Tom. Chak saw an emotion in Tom's eyes that he couldn't quite understand. It almost seemed as if it mattered to Tom that she might hurt me, thought Chakotay. But it doesn't, Fly-Boy doesn't care about me. He has the pick of the litter wherever we go. He doesn't care about a middle-aged man like me; he probably doesn't even like men in that way. "Computer, deactivate Universal Translator, Bridge only," said Tom. Laazia went Berserk. She lifted Tom up by his collar and let loose an incomprehensible string of whistles, chirps, growls, and barks. Chakotay watched in horror. He hoped that she wouldn't hurt Tom too badly. He had to give the pilot credit for thinking quickly on his feet. Chakotay remembered something his mother once told him. Until you were in a crisis situation, you never knew what someone was made of. Chakotay now knew that Tom was someone who could be counted on. While Chakotay stayed close to Starfleet regulations and tried to defeat the enemy in traditional ways, Tom did whatever he had to do. Sometimes Paris was more Maquis then he was, Chakotay laughed to himself. Paris couldn't make out a word the She-Wolf was saying. Deactivating the Universal Translator had left Laazia an inarticulate beast trapped in the nerve center of a completely alien environment. She tossed him savagely against the nearest wall, so that his shoulder bounced painfully against the door to the captain's briefing room. Chakotay heard the shoulder bones crunch from where he sat on the floor and winced at the pain he imagined Tom must be feeling. Still tied up and too bruised and injured to move to try to help Tom, he hoped that Tom wasn't in too much pain. Who knew how long it would take before Captain Janeway came onto the bridge to take it back and he was able to get Tom to sickbay? Chakotay had to believe that the Captain and Tuvok were doing something to take the ship back. He hoped that the Ryols who went after them hadn't succeeded. He shuddered to think of what would happen if the Ryols succeeded in commandeering Voyager. They would suck the life out of all of them, just like they had done to Susan Tukwila. A chill ran down his spine as he remembered what the beast-woman had done to Susan, his former Maquis member. A crazed Laazia turned her gaze to Tom. Despite the Universal Translator being turned off, there was no mistaking the look in her eyes. Oh spirits of my ancestors this is it, thought Chakotay, she is going to kill him. I will never have the chance to tell Tom how sorry I am that I misjudged him and to try to get close to him. STOP IT! Chakotay yelled inwardly to himself. Tom will never get close to you. But you can apologize to him for misjudging him. As he looked at the gorgeous pilot who was a member of the Starfleet equivalent to Royalty, tears came to his eyes. "So long, Dad, " Tom said. "You always said I'd come to a bad end." "Tom, no!" said Chakotay. Paris looked at the spiritually guided man and saw the tears in his eyes. Before Tom could try to figure out what the tears meant and before Laazia could suck the life out of him, he wrinkled his nose at the smell of an unpleasant odor. Laazia, Chakotay and the others on the bridge also smelled it. Anesthezine Gas! All at once he realized what the Captain was up to. She was gassing all of them to put them to sleep, the beast-woman included. Smiling to himself, Paris slipped into unconsciousness along with everyone else. --- Days later, after Kes, Neelix and Torres had been rescued from the surface, and the Ryols had been removed from the Neffalear's planet and deposited on an uninhabited planet where they could do no harm to another species, things began to get underway on Voyager. Extensive repairs were needed so the Captain divided the crew among the repair tasks. Priority one for the next few weeks would be repairing the ship. The Prime Directive and heading home to the Alpha quadrant would have to wait until Voyager was strong again. The Captain assigned Chakotay to supervise the repairs at Engineering and Harry to help B'Elanna put Engineering back together again. The phaser fight between the Ryols and the Voyager crew, which included the Captain, Tuvok, Harry Kim and Carey, had done major damage to Engineering. All those available who had engineering knowledge were assigned to B'Elanna. Even Neelix was assigned to pull half-shifts in Engineering. Chakotay walked off of the Bridge, on his way to Engineering. I won't be seeing Tom for awhile now, he thought to himself, since I will be at Engineering. Maybe it is better this way. Fly-boy would laugh in my face, ridicule me, and never let me live it down if I told him how I felt about him, how I had wet dreams about him, and how the taste, touch and smell of him consumes my every thought. Tom watched Chakotay walk out of the Bridge. I won't be seeing the Commander for awhile now, he thought to himself, since he will be at Engineering. Maybe it is better this way. The Big-man would laugh in my face, ridicule me and never let me live it down if I told him how I felt about him, how I had wet dreams about him, and how the taste, touch and smell of him consumes my every thought. He thinks I am a mercenary with no principals, ethics or morals. If he had had the hypocritical father I had, he would know why my principals are weak. All my father cared about was Starfleet. He cared more about it than his own family. I bet Chakotay had a great father, Tom thought. I wish I could meet the man. As Chakotay entered the Turbolift to go to Engineering, he resigned himself to 70 years in space without Tom. You have to get over him, Chak thought to himself. He will never have you. The captain won't have me, Tom won't, maybe B'Elanna. Maybe I'll make her my partner for the next 70 years. No one else understands her like I do, or can deal with her temper. She is a Senior Officer. Maybe I have a chance with her. I surely do not want to be alone for the rest of the Journey. My spirit- guide can only abate me so much. Chakotay sighed so loud that Harry, who was in the Turbolift next to him, heard it and turned to stare. "Commander, is something wrong?" "Huh?" "You just sighed so loud. I asked if something was wrong," said Harry. "Oh nothing." Harry looked suspiciously at the Commander. He didn't believe for one second that nothing was wrong. "If there is anything I can do to help, just let me know." How about telling your best friend that I want to make mad, passionate love to him every night for the next 70 years and I want to be the only man in his life, thought Chakotay. "Yeah, sure," he replied. Harry looked at the Commander and wondered what was going on. He had never seen the Commander look so hopeless. "Excuse me for being out of line, if I am going to be, but are you upset because of the Ryols almost successfully commandeering our ship or is it something else. It's hard for all of us, Commander. I like to think that we can defend our ship but after this incident, I feel so vulnerable." As much as he liked Tom, and was impressed by how he had tricked Laazia, something had been nagging at Chakotay in the back of his mind. "Harry, do you think that the Ryols had mind control powers or just energy- sapping?" he asked the Ensign. "They just sapped my energy." "Why do you think she was able to turn Paris against us? By now you have heard what happened. Is Tom that easily swayed, is he loyal to us, or does he just follow whoever seems to be on top?" Meghan Delaney had been walking approximately 20 meters behind Chakotay and Harry on her way to Stellar Cartography. When she heard Tom's name mentioned, she picked up her pace to try to overhear the conversation. She closed the gap between herself and the two men to 10 meters. This is going to be good! Meghan thought to herself. I'll get some replicator rations and maybe some gratuitous sex off of Paris for these juicy tidbits. She hugged herself she was so excited and then focused on what the Commander and the Ensign were saying. "Commander! Tom loves this ship! He IS loyal to Voyager. He owes so much to Captain Janeway. She has let him redeem himself and recapture his self-esteem and self-worth." "Then why did Laazia get control of him so easily?" he asked Harry. "I don't know Commander, you just don't understand him. Tom hasn't had it so easy. Everyone in Starfleet loved his father and has such fond memories of him, including the Captain. The problem is that Owen Paris gave so much of his life to Starfleet that he didn't have anything left over to give to his son when he got home, if he even went home. And after the Cardassians tortured his father, he became unstable. Tom said one minute he would be nice and normal, the next he would go flying into fits of rage and be physically abusive, and then he would withdraw and become suicidal. He used to tell Tom to make sure that he took care of his mother after he killed himself." "I thought he was close with his mother," said Chakotay feeling like such a heel. He had always assumed that Tom was born with a silver spoon in his mouth and had thrown it all away for the hell of it and a party. "Are you kidding me? In some ways, Tom's mother was worse than his father. Tom's mother was so superficial. All she cared about was keeping up that Starfleet image... looking like the perfect family, playing the hostess, and perfect Starfleet wife, having Tom be the handsome Starfleet protégé. She never asked Tom what he wanted to do with his life. He told me that when he was little, he wanted to be a veterinarian. The only love and affection he ever got was from animals. If it wasn't for his German Shepherd, Alaskan Husky and two cats, Tom wouldn't have had any love or affection as a boy. I shouldn't be revealing all this to you but you really need to start understanding him. He makes wisecracks all the time and annoys people because as a kid, that was the only way he got attention." They walked into Engineering as Harry finished his sentence. "Commander, I promise you. Tom is loyal." "OK, I believe you. It was just bugging me. It is my job to make sure we can depend on our crew." "You can depend on Tom, sir. I swear on my Grandmother's grave." "Harry, this conversation is between you an me. If I hear that it gets back to Tom, I will demote you down to Brig and Urinal janitor." "Yes Sir." As the two men walked into Engineering, Meghan leaned against the wall to catch her breath. Mon Dieu, the Commander questions Paris' loyalty, she said to herself. She knew their was something weird between Paris and Chakotay but she didn't quite know what. Tom always acted so weird when his name was brought up. In Engineering, the Commander and Harry walked up to B'Elanna. "Lieutenant, status report," Chakotay asked B'Elanna. "To sum it up, this place is a mess. The Dilithium Matrix Infusion Reactors are cracked due to phaser fighting. We are going to have to manually repair each conduit, test for stress fractures, and insure tenacity before we can use them. The Warp core almost breached, the structural integrity is debatable. My Transportable Holographic transfusers were used successfully to defeat the Ryols but they are now in disrepair. And the Coil-Dilation system is offline and leaking." "OK, let's prioritize," responded Chakotay. "Kim, Dalby, Jerron and I will work on the Infusion Reactors. You, Carey, Ayala, and Delaney work on the Warp Core, Vorik, Larson, and Neelix will work on the Coil Dilations. The Holograph will have to wait." "OK," said B'Elanna. "You heard the Commander, people. Let's get going." Chakotay looked toward the Infusion reactor and hoped that the work would keep his mind occupied for awhile so he wouldn't have to think about the enigma Tom Paris and that he had almost watch him die. After hearing the truth from Kim, Chakotay wanted to go to Tom and comfort him. But he knew he was dreaming, his feelings would never be reciprocated. "Harry," B'Elanna said as she grabbed Kim and pulled him aside. "What's with the Commander? He looks so depressed." "I can't say. He told me but it is confidential," whispered Harry --- Later that night, Meghan Delaney bumped into Tom Paris in the Turbolift. "Tomster. I have got some news for you," she said as she ran her hand up and down Tom's chest. "What news, Meghan," said Tom in a bored voice. "I heard the Commander and Harry talking about you this afternoon as I was headed to Stellar Cartography," she lowered her hands on Tom's uniform and started to rub his groin. "So what did they say, " laughed Tom. "Stop rubbing me there, Meghan, or I will take you right here in the Turbolift." "Ooooh, christening the Turbo lift. That has always been one of my fantasies." "If you won't tell me, I'll just get Harry to," said a confident Tom. "He won't tell you. The Commander told him to keep it confidential and you know how Harry is about protocol. In fact, the Commander told Harry that if this got back to you, he would, and I quote, 'Demote him down to Brig and Urinal janitor.' Can you imagine," She laughed. "Harry Kim cleaning toilets and the Brig for the next 70 years." Tom was stunned. It must have been really important for Chakotay to have said that. "Meghan, sweetheart, what did he say?" "How many replicator credits is it worth to you to find out, sweetheart?" "Meghan, I don't have that many. I can give you 5 days worth." Meghan snuggled closer to Tom. "I want 5 days worth and you are spending tonight in my quarters, Fly-Boy. You know what I like," she said as she pulled Tom's face down to hers for a deep kiss. Another night having sex with Meghan but fantasizing about Chakotay, thought Tom to himself, exasperated. "Lead the way, sweetheart. Your quarters it is." --- Two days later B'Elanna, Harry and Tom were eating breakfast together in the mess hall. Neelix had managed to make pancakes from a grain they had found on Ryol. "Man, these pancakes with Talaxian syrup are almost like the ones my cook use to make. Nora would get syrup from Vermont and make pancakes with fresh strawberries. It was Heaven," said Tom. Chakotay walked in and went to stand on line. Tom looked up and saw him walk in. "How's it going with the Commander being with you these days?" Tom asked B'Elanna. "Fine," said B'Elanna. "Harry, " said Tom, "I heard from the peanut gallery that the Commander told you that he doesn't trust me. Is it true he asked you if you thought Laazia really had control of my mind, or if I was just being a mercenary again." Harry choked on his breakfast. "Tom! How the hell did you find out? You don't know how much trouble I will get into if he finds out you know," said a panicked Harry. "Don't worry, Harry. I won't let him demote you to janitor. I'll talk to the Captain. He is such a Son of a Bitch!!! How can he have that little faith in me? We talked about it on the Bridge. I mean Jesus H. Christ!" said Tom exasperated. "I freakin' save his life on Ocampa, rescue the damn ship from the Kazons, sabotage Laazia's commandeering attempt and he doubts my loyalty! My methods may not exactly be kosher but they work! For Gods' sake, what the hell do I have to do to get him to believe in me?" "Tom," said B'Elanna, "Don't get so upset. It doesn't matter. Captain Janeway has faith in you. Why does it matter if Chakotay does?" "B'Elanna, what if something happens to the Captain?" asked Harry. "Chakotay has the Bridge lots of times. It is important that he has faith in Tom. "It's not even that," said Tom. "You just don't understand. I have proven myself to him over and over again and it is never good enough for him. You know, he's like my father. Nothing I did was ever good enough for the Admiral." "Tom, " said Harry gently. "I can understand that you would spend years trying to gain your father's approval but don't transfer that to Chakotay. He's not your father. You don't need his approval. Don't let him drive you crazy" He does drive me crazy, Harry. Can't you tell that, thought Tom. But I don't want him as a father figure; I want him as a lover. Tom, you stupid idiot! Tom scolded himself. You have to move on and get him out of your mind. Across the room, Chakotay sat down at a table with the Captain. "How's it going in Engineering?" she asked. "Slow but steady, there is a lot to do," he answered. "Commander," began Janeway, "I understand that you have questioned Lt. Paris' loyalty. "How did you find out about that?" "Commander, I know everything that goes on on this ship," Janeway said with a smile. Sometimes Chakotay thought that the Captain spied on people. Invading the crew's privacy was against Starfleet regulations but out here, 67 light-years from home, who was here to check on that. Since the Starfleet library of vids was galaxies away, Chakotay wondered if the Captain didn't sometimes spy on people for entertainment. The ships' computer system was equipped with an audio and video monitoring system so that officers could spy on anyone they thought might be a threat to ship's security. Only the Captain and XO had security clearance for that. He made a mental note to never think that around Kes or Tuvok, because they might hear it telepathically. "Commander, Tom Paris is loyal, devoted and I would trust him with my life completely. I need to know that you have 100% confidence in Tom because if, as my mother use to say God-forbid, something ever happens to me you will be the Captain. It will be your job to get everyone home and you will have to rely on Tom for that." "With all due respect Captain, and please don't think I am being rude or insubordinate, but considering my age, I think it will be Tuvok who gets them home. No Indian I know of has ever lived to be 113 years old. I want to believe, with all of my being, that Tom is loyal and dependable, but something about him has always rubbed me the wrong way. I know he saved my life and our ship from the Kazons, but something about him rubs me the wrong way." "There is a fine line between love and hate, Chakotay," said Janeway. "What! What are you trying to imply?" said Chakotay as he turned red and started to sweat. "I think you need to look inward to find out what it is about Tom that conflicts with you. Maybe you should consult your spirit guide." Chakotay fumed. How dare she tell him to consult his spirit-guide. Of course, he wouldn't show her his emotion. "Thank you for your advice, Captain. I have to report to Engineering. Have a good day." Chakotay stood up and left the mess hall. "Wow," observed B'Elanna. Chakotay looks like he's furious. I wonder what the Captain said. Probably something about me, thought Tom. He was so depressed. He had had another wet dream about Chakotay again. My plight is hopeless. I am such a loser. My father was right about me, Tom said to himself. "I'll see you guys later," Tom said to Kim and Torres and with that, left the room. "B'Elanna, Tom looks so depressed. Do you think it had something to do with Laazia and what happened? "I think it has something to do with Chakotay." "Oh, you mean, Chakotay not trusting him?" "Yeah, something like that." --- He had been on Engineering duty for 3 weeks now and hadn't seen Tom at all, except to occasionally pass him in the corridors or to catch a glimpse of him in the mess hall. He was all Chakotay thought about. That beautiful display of courage and bravery was almost Klingon in its strength. Although Torres hated her Klingon heritage, Chakotay wanted one with him in battle anyday. Their strength, courage, bravery and almost bull-headed refusal to surrender, was admirable for battle. Chakotay resolved himself that today would be the day. He would tell Tom that his feelings had changed but wouldn't go so far as to tell him all that he wanted. Chakotay was a proud man and he was not going to risk being laughed at or made a fool of. Seska had made a fool of him enough for a lifetime, Chakotay thought. That's what you get for falling in love with a woman. Relationships had always been easier, less complicated with men, he thought to himself. Although he was attracted to both sexes, women were so much more trouble. Just look at the Captain and all of her baggage. He had been trying to get close to her for three years now and she gave off mixed signal one after the other. He thought that after their time together on New Earth, where they had made love under the stars after they had bathed together in the tub he had built for her, that they would be, a couple, forever. But when they returned to the ship, it was back to business as usual. The captain's walls had gone back up and they were impenetrable. "Computer, locate Lt. Paris," ordered Chakotay. "Lt. Paris is in his quarters." Chakotay stepped off the turbo lift and walked to Tom's quarters. Bree-bop. "Enter" said Paris. He stood in his room wearing his favorite 20th century outfit. A pair of Levi's 501 button fly jeans, a flannel button-down shirt, a white T-shirt underneath and cowboy boots. He was about to go to the mess hall. He looked up to see the Commander walking into his quarters. "Yes, Commander" Chakotay looked at Tom and his mouth went dry. He couldn't believe how delicious the pilot looked in his outfit. Chakotay wanted to wrap his arms around the man, bury his head against the soft flannel and hold on tight for eternity. "Tom, I wanted to tell you," Chakotay began but found it difficult to speak since his mouth was so dry. "To apologize to you for the way I have treated you. I misjudged you from the beginning. I always thought you were a mercenary, a hired-gun, selling yourself to the highest bidder. When you walked onto the bridge with Laazia and her gang of thugs, I thought you had sold out again. I was furious. But after you flew us away from the planet, and betrayed her, I realized that I had sorely misjudged you. You do whatever you have to do to defeat the enemy, even if it means infiltrating them. Sometimes, Paris," Chakotay said with a smile, "Sometimes you're more Maquis then I am. You're courage and bravery is worthy of a Klingon." "And," said Tom. What as asshole! He thought. "And what?" said Chakotay, confused. "And what do you want? You didn't just pay me an insincere compliment for nothing. What is your hidden agenda? What do you want?" Tom was practically yelling. The animosity was so sharp, Chakotay winced. "Insincere compliment! I was being totally sincere, Paris. I have no hidden agenda" "Bullshit! You questioned my loyalty to Harry after we were back in command of the ship. Don't walk in here thinking I'm some kind of idiot, that I don't know what is going on. My friends don't keep secrets from me. One of the crew heard you're conversation with Harry and told me about it. I know what you think of me, Chakotay. You don't trust me. You think I am a playboy with no ethics, morals or values and you have no respect for me. You wouldn't trust me to me watch your back on an away mission. You're so Goddamned sanctimonious, Chakotay! You and your holier-than-thou I-am-better-than-you-because-I-have-a-spirit-guide attitude. I know how you really feel about me Commander, so don't play me for an idiot. What do you want!" "Tom, I told you I misjudged you. I am apologizing for that," said an exasperated Chakotay, wishing Tom would calm down. He knew he would never be close to Tom, but he had hoped they could be friends, at least cordial. "Fine, thank you for sharing, I am soooooo grateful for your little apology. It's made my day!" said Tom sarcastically. "God-Dammit, Paris, why do you always have to be on the defensive? Can't you just say thank you when someone pays you a compliment or apologizes to you?" "What do you want me to say? Oh Thank you, Chakotay," said Tom sarcastically. "It means so much to me that I finally have you're approval. I am soooo glad you like me now." Tom glared at Chakotay. "I wouldn't thank you for passing me the salt at dinner! I wouldn't give you the satisfaction! You know what Chakotay, in some ways, you re worse than my father," said Tom with disgust. "That hurts, Paris. I came in here to try to give you a compliment, and you spit it back in my face. I am sorry I even bothered." Chakotay turned and started to walk out of Paris quarters. Chakotay was almost to the door when Tom said quietly "Chakotay." Chakotay stopped but didn't turn around to face him. "Why were their tears in your eyes when you thought beast-woman was going to kill me. Why did you say Tom, no, after I said my last good-byes to my father?" Chakotay walked back over to Tom. Fuck it, he thought, it's now or never. He put his hand up and gently cupped Tom's left cheek and chin in it, "Because I didn't want you to die, Tom. Because I realized then that if she killed you, I would never get the chance to tell you how sorry I was that I had misjudged you, how wrong I was about you." Chakotay could smell him now. He was irresistible. Every nerve ending was on fire. He felt himself growing hard. He was now to the point where it was almost painful. He leaned in and gently brushed his lips against Tom's. Then he opened his mouth just a little and kissed Tom's upper lip. He ran his tongue over Tom's lips and then opened his mouth completely. He slipped his tongue into Tom's mouth and kissed him with all the passion he had. Tom did not return the kiss; he was to stunned! "Chakotay," Tom rasped, pulling away from the Commander. "I never knew you felt this way." "Paris, uh Tom, I have always been attracted to you. But I wasn't going to be with a man I didn't respect, or like; a man with no ethics or morals. But now I realize that you have them, I misjudged you. When I talked to Harry, he confirmed for me that you were loyal to us and that I had been wrong. You infuriate me because underneath it all, I want you so badly it hurts. And not having you, thinking it was hopeless, drove me insane." "I always wanted you Chakotay," said Tom. "From the first moment I saw you on the Maquis ship. You were everything I wanted to be, but I always thought you hated me." Chakotay leaned in and kissed him again. This time Tom responded. He opened his mouth and returned a deep, hot, wet, passionate kiss. They stood there and held each other for 5 minutes, kissing passionately. Tom could feel his nerve-endings standing on edge. When he put his hand on Chakotay's uniform, massaging his hardness, the big-man thought he was going to lose it. "Ohhh Chakotay," said Tom, as he leaned in more, pressing his own hardness against that of the Indian's. Chakotay stuck his tongue as far down Tom's throat as he could. He wrapped his left arm around the lithe blond, and ran his right hand through the golden-blonde hair. It is so soft! thought Chakotay of Tom's hair. Fire was pulsing through him, heat and sparks and lightening. He couldn't get enough. Tom used his hands to undo Chakotay's uniform. He got it off enough to reach in and wrap his hands around the big-man's rock hard manhood. "Ohhhh," Chakotay groaned as Tom massaged him. Tom pulled Chakotay's penis out of his uniform, bent down and wrapped his mouth around him. As he started to suck, and dart his tongue around the tip of Chakotay's penis, Chakotay knew he was a goner. Barely ten seconds into it, he came in the pilot's mouth. "Oh Gods Tom, I'm so sorry. I was to excited." "It's okay. It excites me to know that I excite you that much. I thought you hated me and I wanted you so much. I can't tell you how many wet dreams I have had about you." "I have wanted you since the first day I met you, said the Commander. But I never thought it was possible that we could click. I looked at you and saw everything I wasn't... Starfleet Royalty. I thought you were born with a silver spoon in your mouth and had everything handed to you on a silver platter. It infuriated me because I had to work for everything I got since my father decided to live the old way." "I wish I could have met your father, Chakotay. The way you talk about him, I bet he was a great Dad. My Dad ignored me unless he was criticizing me or telling me how to behave more Starfleet. I would trade Dads with you anyday." Chakotay looked at Tom and knew that he was a goner; he had found his soulmate. There could be no other for him till the day he became one of the spirits of his ancestors. He only hoped Tom felt the same way. He hoped he could be enough for the young pilot. "Why don't you tell me what I did to you in those wet dreams," said Chakotay as he smiled. "Better yet, I'll show you," said Tom, licking his lips. As the two men walked into Tom's bedroom, they stripped off their uniforms. They admired each other's bodies and then got into the bed. Chakotay lay on top of Tom and kissed him, long and hard. He felt Tom's hardness underneath him. It wasn't fair that he should come so soon and Tom should have to wait, so he knelt down and took Tom in his mouth. He tasted his sweet saltiness and was about to lose himself in this gorgeous young man. "Ohhhhh, Chakotay." Tom groaned. It was better than he had ever imagined. All of his wet dreams about Chakotay (and Tom really had lost count of how many he had had) weren't as good as the real thing. As the Maquis leader's mouth sucked hungrily on him, Tom felt his tongue licking all around his penis. He moved his hips in motion, in rhythm, with the Commander's motions. I have died and gone to Heaven, thought Tom. "Chakotay, that's not what you did to me in the wet dream," laughed Tom. "Oh no," smiled Chakotay as he pulled his head up, "Show me." "Well first, you sucked on me right here," said Tom, pointing to the area in the middle of the neck under his left ear Chakotay moved so that he was lying on top of Tom and began kissing and sucking on his neck. "And your hand massaged me right here," said Tom, taking Chakotay's hand and moving it so that the hand cupped his balls. Chakotay let himself be guided. "Your other hand massaged me here," instructed the Lt. wrapping Chakotay's hand around his penis. "And then you did this" he whispered as he pushed Chakotay's penis into the man's hand which already held his own. He wanted to feel his new lover's penis against his own. Tom felt and noticed that Chakotay was uncircumcised. Interesting, thought the Irishman, I have never been with an uncut man before. I have heard it' s more exciting with them, he thought to himself. "Then you switched to kissing the other side of my neck." As Chakotay dutifully switched his mouth to the other side of Tom's neck, Tom thought to himself, I can't take much more of this, I am going to explode. Tom tried to savor the moment but realized that if he didn't do something quickly, he was going to cum in the Commander's hands. Zeus and Hercules, he said to himself, I am making love to my XO, if my Dad could see me now! "Then you kissed me right here," Tom said as he struggled out from under the bigger man and turned over, pointing to his butt. Chakotay leaned down and started licking. As Paris felt the man's hot, wet tongue jutting about in his crevice, precum dripped out from his penis, which was so hard it hurt. "Then," Paris gasped, "you reached into my night-table drawer, pulled out the tube of lubricant, and started working your way in with your finger to loosen me up." Chakotay did as he was told, his own penis so hard it stood at attention. Damn, laughed Tom to himself, I am being saluted by a higher-ranking officer. When Chakotay got back in bed, he squeezed some lube out onto his fingers, and then started massaging Tom's sphincter muscle, loosening it up. "After you loosened me up enough, you rubbed some lube on yourself and then you thrust inside of me." Following his orders, Chakotay rubbed some of the lube on himself, and then thrust his rock-hard uncircumcised manhood into Tom. "Ohhhhhhhhh," they both groaned together. "You reached around with both of your hands. One cups my balls and massages them, the other was around my throttle...in my dream, I mean. That's what you did then." "Oh yes!!!!!!! yelled Tom, as Chakotay carried out the dream. Oh Gods YES!" The two men moved in harmony. As Chakotay thrust forward into Tom, using both of his hands to massage Tom's genitals, Tom thrust backward. They were so insync with each other, it was as if they had practiced this routine, like a ballet dancer practices so that the routine looks effortless. "Ahhhhh!!!!!" They both yelled as they came at the same time and then collapsed, Chakotay on top of Tom. They lay there, spent, for ten minutes. "How was it," asked Chakotay, "As good as in your dream?" "Are you kidding?" asked Tom as he turned around so he could face the Commander. He saw a look of worry in the darker man's eyes, as if the stoic Indian thought the dream was better. "You were 100 times better than in the dream," He said as he kissed the man on his lips "You call your penis your Throttle?" Chakotay said as he raised an eyebrow, much like Tuvok. Tom laughed. "Yeah, so. I'm a pilot, what'd you expect." "Tom?" asked Chakotay. "Mmmh," said Tom as he cuddled into Chakotay's arms. "Who told you what I said to Harry?" "Meghan Delaney. I had to give her 5 days worth of replicator credits and fuck her to get it out of her." "From now on, no more of that. You only have sex, make love and fuck me." "Agreed as long as the same goes for you." "Of course it does." "Good," said Tom. Chakotay smiled, "Good. Tomorrow night, you carry out what you do to me in my wet dreams." "Is that an order?" teased Tom. "Yes." "Then Yes Sir!" laughed Tom. As the two rolled onto their sides, still cuddling with each other, Tom spooned inside of Chakotay's body, Tom whispered, "Chak, What do you want from me?" "I want you to be mine for the rest of your life. I want your mind, body and soul." As the two men nestled against each other in bed, Tom said quietly. "Chakotay?" "Mmm," mumbled Chakotay. "You know I am loyal to this ship, right? You don't doubt my loyalty anymore, do you?" "100% Tom. I know you are on my side." "Chak, if we get back and things are still the same, are you going to go back to the Maquis?" "I don't know what I'll do." "Whatever you do, I'll do." Chakotay wrapped his arms and body even tighter against the younger man. He knew that that was Tom's way of pledging his undying loyalty and love to him." "I love you, too, Tom," said the Big Man. Tom held the Maquis leader's arms tight around him, he smiled to himself. He was a happy man. --- The End