The BLTS Archive- Pillow Talk by Espressivo (espressivo@nettrash.com) --- "Data?" "Yes, Geordi?" "Doesn't matter." Geordi lay his head back down on Data's shoulder and tightened his arms momentarily around the android's waist before closing his eyes. They spent a moment nestled together in companionable silence. "Geordi?" "Yeah?" "What were you going to say?" "Never mind, it's not important." "Oh. Goodnight then." "'Night, Data." Data shifted his arm slightly to a position calculated to provide his friend a more comfortable night's rest. He would wait until Geordi had fallen asleep before activating his own dream program. Until then he would monitor his friend's breathing rate and heartbeat, not for any reason other than he enjoyed doing so. He had no idea why this should be, but was content with the ritual nonetheless. "It's just that. . . " Data waited, but Geordi didn't seem interested in completing the thought. Instead, he squirmed a little and then turned on his side, facing away from Data. "Is something troubling you, Geordi?" Silence. "Pleasant dreams then... ," Data added tentatively. This was met by more silence, and then a sudden explosive sigh. "Look, it's nothing, Data! Honestly! Everything is perfectly fine. It's normal. Just go to sleep, 'K?" "Certainly, Geordi. . . " A beat, then, "What is normal?" "Everything is normal! You, me, us, all of it! We're normal, the _relationship_ is normal, everything we do is normal! Now I'm going to try and have a normal night's sleep." "I see." Data lay and pondered Geordi's tirade silently, reviewing all probable causes of his friend's bizarre behavior and attempting to calculate the variables of the possible reactions should he, Data, attempt to take the conversation further. Eventually, sheer curiosity won out over basic caution, as it usually did. "If everything, as you claim, is normal, then why are you acting in such an abnormal manner? Geordi?", and then faced with silence Data did what he always did in these situations; he attempted to fill the silence himself. In short, he began to babble. "I only ask because I find your behavior to be atypical, which may indicate that, contrary to your verbal statements, the situation is not normal and there may, in fact, be a problem of some sort that I am not aware of. I may, of course, be incorrect in this assessment, in which case I assume you will correct me, but I believe that my past experience with you has shown that you often do not state clearly why you are feeling argumentative and hostile, and, to the contrary, have a tendency to verbally deny that there is any problem at all. Furthermore, I believe that by making you aware of. . . " "Data. . . " ". . . my concern that you will realize. . . " "DATA!" "I am sorry, Geordi. I only wanted you to know that I. . . wish to help." Geordi sighed again, disgusted with himself. Of course Data wanted to help, and here he was acting like a total jerk. Why had he even said anything in the first place? Had he honestly thought that Data wouldn't pick up on his mood? It had all been so much simpler before that damned emotion chip. Now he had to weigh every single word he said to avoid upsetting his friend and here he was botching up the first real discussion they'd ever had about their relationship. God, he was such an idiot! Now he could either tell Data what was bothering him or continue to maintain that it was 'nothing'. Either way, Data would probably end up feeling rejected, if not down right hurt. //Idiot!// Geordi took a deep breath and decided to take the plunge. "Data, we need to talk." "Certainly, Geordi." Geordi paused to muster his thoughts. Unfortunately, his thoughts refused to be mustered. He couldn't think of a single tactful way to say what he had to say. He rolled onto his side to face Data, wrapping an arm across his golden chest and hoping that somehow the contact would help mitigate anything he might say. Eventually, he just opened his mouth and waited just as anxiously as Data to see what would come out. "I'm. . . unhappy. No, no, not unhappy. . . more sort of. . . this relationship, us, it kind of feels. . . something's not right, you know? I mean, it's right, but something's wrong. . . not with you. You're perfect! It's me. . . I'm just not satisfied. . . no, yes, no I am satisfied, but something's missing. . . with us. . . no, with me, and. . . Oh I don't know Data, I don't know what it is. I'm sorry. I don't know what I'm trying to say. I can't put my finger on it. I'm happy but I'm not, I'm satisfied but I'm not, it's perfect but it's not. God, I'm such a moron. . . " His voice trailed away. Data lay like a statue against him, neither speaking or moving. Geordi knew that that wasn't a good sign at all. He'd just said a bunch of contradictory and confusing things and that meant that this was Data's cue to request 'additional information' or say 'please clarify' or something similar, but he was just laying there like a stone, practically radiating waves of distress. Geordi decided to change his approach. "Hey, Data?" Geordi's voice was gentle and apologetic. "Do you remember how it was when we first got together? "Of course." Tonelessly. Businesslike. //Shit.// "I used to get so worried about things, stupid things, like if you liked me, or if you'd want me. . . or. . . you know, just stupid stuff. How to ask you, and what if you said no, or yes. . . and I'd just tie myself in knots with all the what-ifs and maybes, just making myself sick, and then I'd look at you in Engineering or something, and you'd be so. . . so damn perfect, and that was even worse somehow. "And then we finally got together and it didn't help at all because then I was worrying about other stupid stuff like how you'd like to be touched and whether I was doing the right things or not, and . . . you know, just all that idiotic stuff, you know?" "Yes Geordi, I know." Data's voice was very soft, but also warmer. Geordi was heartened to feel that his body had also relaxed somewhat from his previous ramrod straight position. "Data. . . back then. . . did you ever feel like that, like me? Uncertain?" "Constantly." Although Geordi couldn't see Data's face in the dark he was sure the android was wearing one of his small smiles. Feeling that he was on firmer ground he went on. "Yeah, it feels so stupid now to think that we were worried about crap like that doesn't it?" He let out a small laugh. "But boy, I'll tell you, those days were sure fun weren't they? " "Fun?" Data sounded puzzled. "Sure! All that worrying for nothing, all that groping around in the dark. . . " Geordi let out a sudden spontaneous guffaw. "Hey! Remember when the Captain paged you that time and you got all tangled in the sheets because you were in such a hurry to get to your communicator?" He laughed again and shook his head. "I'll never forget that. You, scrambling around to get to your jacket, stark naked, hair all mussed, sheets tangled up around your legs. . . God that was funny." "I remember Geordi. I knelt on your hand and caused you pain. I still regret that incident." "But. . . but Data, that was an accident. You were in a hurry. . . my hand was under the sheet. . . it wasn't your fault. Hell, even I thought it was funny after my hand stopped hurting!" "I should have been more careful." "But. . . look, that's not the point OK? The point is we used to have fun like that all the time, you know?" "No, I do not know. I do not believe I understand at all. It took me a great deal of time for me to learn exactly what you preferred and was able to predict your body's responses. I am sorry that it took me so long. That time must have been unsatisfactory for you." His mournful tone brightened. "However, I am now certain that I can provide an optimal sexual experience for you whenever you desire it without further 'accidents' occurring." In contrast to Data's cheerful tone, Geordi's voice, when it came, lacked the same enthusiasm. "Yep. You sure can. Your technique is perfect." "Thank you Geordi." "Perfect." "I am glad you feel that way." "Perfect." "I am pleased that you are sexually fulfilled." "Perfect." Data cocked his head on the pillow and paused. "I believe that you are trying to tell me something by your repetitiveness. Am I correct in this assessment?" "Yep." Geordi could practically hear the cogs churning in Data's head. "May I ask if this is another case of you saying something that is contrary to what you wish to say?" "Sure is." "Therefore you are attempting to tell me that my technique is not perfect?" "Oh Data. . . no, you're great, honestly, but. . . " At a loss for words Geordi sat up in frustration. The light sheet bunched around his hips and pooled in his lap, where he began to twist it in his hands. "If you require something Geordi, you know that you only need ask. I would welcome any suggestions in how I may better serve your needs." Data's voice sounded almost fragile. //Oh you idiot. IDIOT! He's perfect and you know it and now you've hurt him and he only ever wanted to make you happy! How in the hell are you going to fix this now?// "Look, Data. . . sit up a minute." Data complied unhesitatingly. Geordi cupped his hands over the android's cheeks and held his face gently. "I'm sorry. I'm just not good at this, that's all. You are perfect, everything you do to me is just wonderful, honestly. It's just that. . . well, sometimes. . . sometimes I don't need everything to be perfect. It's like. . . well, have you ever heard the expression 'Too much of a good thing'? That's what this is. It's. . . God, I mean it's wonderful all the time and that, well, when something is wonderful all the time then it can get sort of boring. It's not bad exactly, just kind of predictable. But in a good way." He snorted. "I really am lousy at this. I'm sorry Data, I didn't mean to make you feel bad. Do you understand what I'm trying to say?" Data placed one of his hands over the hand already at his cheek and leant forward to place a soft kiss on Geordi's lips. "I understand Geordi." The voice was soft and tender, full of love and forgiveness. "Do not trouble yourself further. From now on I shall attempt to leave you unsatisfied and frustrated at unpredictable moments." Data's voice took on a cheerful tone. "I can even kneel on your hand occasionally, if you wish it?" Geordi sank back onto the bed, defeated. "Yeah Data, that'd be great, thanks." Data lay back and gathered Geordi into his arms, once more feeling secure in the relationship and quite proud of himself for deciphering this precious human's needs. "You are welcome, Geordi. Goodnight." --- The End