The BLTS Archive- Only Time
by Donna (moongirl527@yahoo.com)

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Feedback: Please (be gentle though ;) )

Distribution: BLTS (anybody else please ask)

Disclaimer: The characters aren't mine, but the story is!

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"Why don't we head back?" she asked, trying to change the subject.
There was something unnerving about discussing a possible future (or
was it past?) romantic involvement with Odo–*any* version of
him–while kneeling over the grave bearing her name in Bajoran
symbols. It was...confusing.

Even more confusing was *this* Odo. He was Odo, but not. The eyes
were the same, but there was a gentleness that she had never noticed
before. The crinkles surrounding them gave him an air of warmth, as
though he always smiled. He had fine hairs over his eyes, a perfect
imitation of eyebrows. His ears had grown more definitive, more
humanoid like.

Anyway, it wasn't just the improved shapeshifting skills or the
slight change to his facial features. He had a new attitude toward
her, most especially his confession: *I love you, Nerys. I've ALWAYS
loved you.*

His voice had been full of emotion. That alone separated him from the
Odo he had once been. Every word he spoke to her came from a voice
filled with gentleness, with sincere feeling. The gruffness was still
there, but now it sounded different. It was...sexy.

He nodded and stood up, holding his hand out. Briefly he wondered if
this was too forward a gesture, but was elated when she took it to
help her stand up. Kira Nerys never needed help to get up, but the
fact that she took it from him was encouraging. Her hand was soft and
warm, fitting in his perfectly. It reassured him that he was really
with her. As she rose, her eyes met his and their gaze never wavered.

Odo was content. Kira knew about his feelings and was seeing a
sensitivity within him that she perhaps might not have seen before.
He was seeing her, feeling her hand in his own as they walked side by
side through the tall grass. Words didn't matter right now.

His only fear at this moment was that she would drop her hand from
his. But she didn't.

"Odo," she said, when they were about a mile and a half away from the
settlement.

He stopped and faced her.

Kira smiled nervously. "It's a little strange calling you that."

He smiled. "I understand."

She stared at him. *I understand.* He seemed like he really *did*
understand. "Tell me what became of you. What did you do after I...?"

His reaction was instantaneous. His hand tightened around hers and he
gave a genuine wince of pain, as though she had accidentally walked
on his foot. *Well, if he had been humanoid.*

He recovered as fast as he could, preparing himself to tell her the
story nobody else knew. "It took me, from what I can tell, six months
to regain my abilities as they were...as though I was an infant. I
was stuck in my liquid state, completely lacking any way to
communicate. Ironic, isn't it, to find my natural state a prison?" He
harrumphed, noting a smile on her face as he did so.

*Some things never change. No matter what, Odo will always be Odo,*
she thought with a smile.

Odo's voice changed to a quiet sadness. "I couldn't even tell
you–*her*-- goodbye. All I could do was sit in my beaker, paralyzed,
when Bashir told me that you had...." He shook his head, trying to
remove the memory of that morning when everything in his world had
changed into the manure the settlers used to fertilize their crops.
"I left the settlement so that I could go to your–*her*–grave.
Everybody else had moved on, but I couldn't. I couldn't stay there
anymore. I would visit the settlement to find out how much time had
passed, then I would leave. Nobody knew when I came by. I spent two
hundred years on shapeshifting, reflection, and gardening."

Kira blinked. "Gardening?"

He nodded. "I became fascinated by the wild flowers on the far side,
near the lake. I studied them carefully and experimented in different
environments. In the moonlight, their petals glowed a bright red. I
was reminded of the beautiful color of your hair. I brought some back
and planted them around the tree, and lay a bouquet on your grave. I
took pleasure in seeing to them...and visiting at the same time. I
kept to the forest a mile away...."

He smiled. "I'll admit that in the last few months I didn't focus on
the wild flowers. I had other things on my mind, and I grew
impatient. Then this morning the boys saw me emerging from the forest
in my humanoid form. They weren't afraid of me. I gather that
everybody now knows where I am. After many questions, they finally
told me that you–the *Defiant*'s crew–had arrived. That brought me to
the infirmary to see you."

She smiled at him, squeezing his hand. "You were right. It's gorgeous
here."

He nodded. "I've explored every part of this planet and in different
forms. Right now, Nerys, I am reminded why *this* form is my
favorite."

Kira stared into his eyes. The emotion pouring out of their bright
blue depths caused a lump in her throat. His bluntness was both
tender and overwhelming. *Does MY Odo have this within him? Or would
it take two hundred years?*

"Be patient, Nerys. It will take some time for him to change."

She furrowed her brow, offering him a smirk. "Am I so transparent?"

He shrugged. "Your eyes. Everything you thinking and feeling is
instantly revealed in them."

"Nobody else ever read my mind like that."

He smiled tenderly at her. "I'm not Betazoid, Nerys. I don't read
minds. All I had to do was look into your eyes. It's simple enough if
one looks properly."

*If one looks properly.* Instantly, she was reminded of those in her
life who had never gazed into her eyes in the same way Odo was right
now.

Thankfully, he didn't delve further, but looked upwards. "The sun is
setting. I've longed for you to see this."

Kira followed his stare and was rewarded with the sight of greens,
oranges, and purples of various shades streaking across the sky. It
was breathtaking. "Wow, it's beautiful."

"I agree," he replied, squeezing her hand. After a long moment, he
said, "We should get you back."

She shook her head. "I'd like to stay here."

He studied her for a long moment. It was obvious that no amount of
urging would sway her decision and he refused to waste such precious
time with her by fighting. "All right." He treasured every second
with her.

Kira looked at the darkening sky, the colors of sunset fading into
nightfall.

Odo watched her intently, trying to savor this moment. It was hard to
think coherently when he could still feel her hand in his.

She could feel his eyes resting on her. It didn't make her
uncomfortable, exactly. When she turned her head to look at him, she
became only too aware of how closely they were standing. Even as the
sky darkened around them, she could still see his crystal blue eyes
and the way they sparkled with obvious adoration. *Have those eyes
always been so beautiful?*she wondered. Now she wished she had stared
into Odo's eyes more often.

He brought his other hand to her face, caressing it in the same
gentle manner he had upon their "reunion" in the infirmary. Only this
time it was  less awkward for her.

Their foreheads rested against each other and Kira breathed in his
scent. He smelled of the air, the earth, and the water. It was even
sexier than any humanoid she'd ever met. But he wasn't a humanoid,
and he never wore cologne. Even when he *was* humanoid. This smell
was *his.*

He inclined his head to kiss her, now finding himself utterly lost in
desire and not looking for a way out. "Nerys."

"Odo..." she murmured. Permission granted.

When his lips touched hers, Kira responded immediately. It was as
though she was being guided by the Prophets to this man, to her
friend. She didn't have to think. She followed her instinct and her
own desire for this moment, now knowing that it had been long ago
etched into her body, heart, and pagh.

His kiss was tender and slow. He searched her mouth thoroughly, as
though marking each area with his tongue before exploring another
region. *How did he get that sexy voice from such a smooth mouth?*
she wondered, happily taking the same liberty. She could taste the
air and the  forest in his mouth. This was easily the most erotic
kiss she had ever experienced.

He felt as though time had stopped. This was right. This was how he
wanted to live.

When the kiss ended, he pulled her against him and held her in his
arms. Soon, she would be gone. Even with Yedrin's modified plan, Kira
would be gone and *he* would never know this bliss again. The Kira
from his own time would die and he would be doomed to be alone.
However, all he wanted was for *this* Kira to return to DS9. That was
his mission.

---

What he hadn't counted on was Yedrin's deceit. There was *not* going
to be a duplicate Defiant. He had concocted that false theory in
order to lure the crew to repeat the same mistake to preserve the
settlement.

It was unforgivable.

This only made it even more urgent for Kira to leave, despite
Yedrin's plea. The settlement was an anomaly. It seemed that he was
the only one who remembered the most important fact of all: this
settlement was not meant to exist. He would make sure Yedrin Dax
remembered that.

"This is wrong," he said angrily to the Trill, not bothering to
announce his presence.

Yedrin looked at him for a long moment. "I knew you would feel that
way, especially when you saw *her.* But this is a far more complex
issue than rewriting history so that you can have a romance, Odo."

He glared. This argument had been a longtime coming. "You've
forgotten exactly why we ended up here. Most importantly, why Major
Kira is buried on that mountainside–because of *you*." This was a
large reason why he left the settlement, something he decided *not*
to tell Kira. Without Kira, there was nobody. Because of Jadzia, they
were all stranded...and the woman he'd always loved had died. He was
unable to look at her without bitterness and anger.

Yedrin bristled. "There are eight thousand people at stake. I won't
sacrifice them for your...fascination...with Kira. Did you really
think it would change things?"

"It has to."

"Luckily, it isn't up to you, Constable," Yedrin retorted. His
expression turned sympathetic. "Look, I know this is difficult for
you. Spend time with her, tell her how you feel...."

"I have."

"Tell her goodbye, Odo. I don't like it, but this is the way it has
to be."

*No, it isn't.* He left without another word.

Remaining inside Yedrin's home was pointless. He was determined to
make sure the Defiant repeated its mistake. But it would not happen.
No, he would protect Kira, protect her future by making sure she
returned to DS9. He only hoped that she was thinking along the same
lines.

---

No such luck.

Kira returned to the grave site and stared at it, feeling his
presence as he walked beside her.

"Why did you want to come back here?" he asked. It would be fine for
him if he never returned here.

"I had to see it again so I could be sure."

There was something about her voice that he didn't like. "Sure about
what?"

She didn't know how to tell him. True to their friendship, she could
only tell him the truth. It was the only way, and after what had
blossomed between them she had to show him the same courtesy. "That
this is where I belong. The path the Prophets laid out for me ends
here."

He tried to remain calm. "Well, not this time, Nerys. The captain's
taking you back to DS9."

Kira shook her head. "I can't let him do that. No if it's gonna cost
eight thousand lives. No. We have to let history take its
course...even if it means I have to die here."

He stared at the grave and then to Kira, giving a long look at each.
No. This wasn't right. She shouldn't have to sacrifice her life for
this temporal scratch, this folly in time's judgement.

He remained silent as they walked to the Defiant, words escaping him.
How to convince her not to agree to Yedrin's selfish plea and *not*
to save eight thousand colonists? Sure, he liked the children. But
they weren't meant to be. Kira was. Kira was not selfish. She was
generous. Unfortunately, she was also determined. And stubborn.

When they reached the Defiant, he finally found his voice. "You can't
do this."

"Please don't make this harder than it already is," Kira replied,
trying to keep her voice as unemotional as she could. Didn't he know
how hard this was, after just discovering a new side to her friend
that she....It was better not to think too deeply on that. No. She
would go to Sisko and make her position clear.

He was unable to restrain his desperation. "You have to go home,
Nerys. You *have* to!"

"This isn't about me," she said firmly. "This is about the eight
thousand people down on that planet, their children, and their
grandchildren."

Odo stopped her in her tracks, cutting her off before she could walk
further. "What about the children who will never be born because the
Defiant doesn't return to DS9?"

"They don't exist yet. These people *do*."

Now he knew. There was absolutely no way she would change her mind.
It all came down to one important question, one answer that would
decide his course of action. It was despondent, maybe. But it was all
he had. He took her hands in his and gazed longingly into her eyes.
"Nerys, just tell me one thing. If you'd known how I felt about
you–if I had said something years ago–do you think things might have
been different?"

Kira fought tears and was sure that she was failing. She nodded
slowly, coming to terms with the truth herself. "Maybe," she replied
softly, her voice barely above a whisper.

Two hundred years' worth of emotion swept through him, so powerful it
almost knocked him over. *Maybe...that means that for all those years
there WAS a possibility.* The answer he had never let himself hope
for, had feared to dream. But it was the truth. The proof rested in
those gorgeous brown eyes.

She leaned forward slowly and he inclined his head to meet her,
seeking her kiss. It was all too brief and very sad. *She is kissing
me goodbye.* He didn't attempt to make it last longer. He rested his
forehead against hers, yearning to hold her against him as long as
possible.

Sensing this, Kira squeezed his hands and walked down the corridor.
She didn't look back.

If she had, she would have noticed him standing there hunched over
and trembling, his breath ragged. His hands were clenched tightly as
if he was  still holding her. Grief was etched into every feature on
his face.

Now he was certain that he was doing the right thing. Kira Nerys
would return to DS9. He would see to it. Immediately.

---

"Come in."

He wasn't sure that he wanted to enter, but he knew he had to. Kira
needed to know the truth. She also needed to know that *he* knew his
feelings for her were no longer a secret between them. Besides, there
was a far more important secret that he was about to reveal.

Odo entered slowly, carefully. For a long moment he couldn't look at
her. Could he have gone two hundred years without seeing her or
hearing her voice? He stared at her and realized that he could not.
No, his alternate self had done the right thing.

"Odo." *This* was the Odo she had always known. Then again, there was
no longer the *other* Odo. He never existed. But she could still
remember the day before, feeling his lips and staring into his eyes.
Now what they shared was a memory...of something that never was.
Perhaps it still could be, but not yet.

Her tone of voice gave away that she had expected to see him, though
perhaps she hadn't looked forward to it. Was this how it would be
now? Would she avoid him? He would make this as swift as possible.
"There's something you should know. The other Odo–the one from the
planet–came to Sickbay before he left the ship."

"Oh?" Expectation, as though she knew what to expect.

"He linked with me." He cleared his throat. "Now I know everything
that happened."

Kira looked down. "The, uh, other day when I told you about Shakaar
and me not seeing each other anymore, you seemed so uncomfortable."
She remembered that now, the way he almost couldn't speak and made as
fast an escape as possible. She had assumed it was because she and
Dax had been discussing humanoid relationships. No. It was because of
*her.*

*Ah. She DID notice.* "I'd come to accept the fact that you were
involved with someone else...then suddenly, everything changed."

"I don't know what to say," she said quietly. "I'm still trying to
sort everything else."

Odo nodded. That was an acceptable, reasonable response. "So am I."
There was so much to think about now. "I think we both need some
time." He turned to leave, but stopped to face her. *Now.* This was a
difficult message to bear, but one to be delivered if she was to
fully consider her feelings for him and his for her. "There's
something else the other Odo wanted you to know."

Kira sat up straighter.

"He was responsible for changing the Defiant's flight plan."

Her face paled immediately. She hadn't considered the possibility.
She has assumed Yedrin has simply changed his mind. But...*Odo?*
"Why?" she demanded, stunned.

"So that you wouldn't have to die," Odo replied, his voice hoarse
with feeling.

She was still in shock. "I can't believe it! Eight thousand people!"

"He did it for you, Nerys. He *loved* you!"

"That makes it right?!"

Odo shook his head, devoid of any response to give to her. "I don't
know. *He* thought so." The room suddenly felt too small for the two
of them. Her expression wasn't encouraging either. "I'll see you in
the morning." He left her alone in the room and stopped when he heard
the door close behind him. He didn't know what they would say to each
other next time they saw each other, or even if they would discuss
what happened the next morning or even the morning after that. But he
would wait. She, Major Kira Nerys, was worth the wait.

Only time would tell how long his wait would be.

---

The End