The BLTS Archive- Brave Hearts, Strong Souls
by Joanne Collins (luchenbackoutlaw@gmail.com)

---

Well, I thought I'd try this first line challenge on the CPSG.  I
wrote a C/P story a while ago called Come In Out Of The World, which
was a PWP, but in my establishing of the relationship, I said that
their first kiss had been on the bridge.  So this is a prequel-with-a-
plot to that story.

All characters herein that you recognise belong to Paramount and
are used without permission or intention of infringement.  The song If
That's What It Takes is sung by Celine Dion on the "Falling Into You"
CD.  All original content and characters are the sole property of the
author.

For Mona.  Happy Birthday!  Just a little present.  Again *slightly*
belated.

Slash, m/m, NC-17.  You don't like it, don't read it.

ASC archive:  Yes.
BLTS:  Yes.
R'Rain's archive:  Yes.
Anywhere else (except personal use, sharing with friends, etc):  Ask
first!  I'll probably say yes.

Setting:  At the end of Basics Part Two.  Some dialogue is
paraphased from that episode.

---

They kissed on the bridge.

Well, Chakotay kissed Tom.  Tom was too startled to do *anything*,
even respond.  This was too much.  After the past several days, this
was just one more shock.

Later, when he discussed it with Harry and B'Elanna, they'd say that
they didn't know who had been more surprised.  Tom *knew* it had
been him.  There was no *way* he could have *ever* expected this,
not even in his wildest fantasies about Chakotay.  This was the *last*
place he would have thought of for their first kiss, if he'd ever
imagined that they would have a first kiss.

After almost getting killed getting the ship back for the crew he was
starting to think of as his family, Tom was running on adrenaline.
Maybe *that* explained why he moved his hands up to grip
Chakotay's shoulders, and ease the older man back from the plunder of
his lips.

"What?" Chakotay asked.

"Chakotay, what the hell is all this about?" Tom whispered, blushing
fiercely.

Chakotay seemed to realise where he was, suddenly, and released
his grip on Tom's arms.

"Gods, Tom, I'm sorry.  This is hardly the time or place..."

"Are you saying that you might want to...continue this at
an...appropriate time and place?" Tom asked, incredulous.

"I think maybe we need to talk, Tom.  This isn't...I never intended
for
it to be like this."

"You intended it to be some way?"

"Tom, not now.  Can you meet me later, in my quarters?"

"Uh, Chakotay, the senior officers' quarters...Seska gave some
very...explicit orders as to what to do to them."

"Oh."

"Yeah.  It's not pretty.  My quarters aren't too bad, I've had the
chance to clean them up.  Want to talk there?"

"Anywhere, Tom.  Just somewhere we won't be disturbed unless
there's an emergency."

"I need you on the bridge, Tom, for at least half a shift," Janeway
chimed in.

"And Chakotay," Tom began, hesitantly, "You have some...unfinished
business in Sickbay."

Chakotay knew what Tom was referring to, one of the first questions
he'd asked had been about Seska.

"Chakotay?  Meet me in holodeck two in three hours.  If that's long
enough?"

"Oh, yes."

"And no uniforms.  Okay?"

"Yes, Lieutenant," Chakotay mock-saluted, then sobered, leaving the
bridge.

"Lieutenant, set a course away from our new home, back towards the
old one," Janeway commanded.

"Yes, ma'am," Tom said, making the necessary course adjustments.

---

After his shift, Tom went to his quarters to shower, then dressed in a
pair of faded jeans and a blue checked shirt.  Comfort, not fashion
was his objective, and he knew that the outfit looked good on him.

"What am I *doing*?" he asked himself, when he considered changing
clothes to something a little more formal.  "For all I know, that was
just a momentary impulse.  Gods, it was incredible, though. How long
have I wanted this?  Too damn long.  Probably since we first met, back
in the Maquis, but feelings of resentment overcame the other feelings
for a time.  I wonder what he'd say if he knew that a large part of my
getting the ship back was for him.  Oh, I wanted it for Janeway, and
Harry and B'Elanna, all the others, but *he* was the reason I
volunteered for anything I could do to help his child.  And then it
turns out *not* to be his.  The *last* thing he needs right now is
more complications in his life.  But I want him, so much.

And it's not just sex, although I *definitely* want him as a lover.
It's more.  I want to help him with everything.  I want to give him
back rubs after a hard day, I want to be there when he finishes his
shift and just needs to be held and I want to be there when he needs
to talk about his problems.  Gods, I am in love.  But that's not so
bad.  At least there's a chance that he *does* feel something for me.
That kiss was proof of it.  What if he doesn't feel the same way,
though?  I couldn't *stand* it if this turned out to just be a one-
night stand.

Listen to me, Tom Paris, a-different-lover-every-week when I was in
Starfleet, and even up until that...incident with the Baneans.  That
woke me up, big time.  Then when I finally figure out who and what I
want, that whole thing with Seska and the spy started.  Then I
realised that he felt something for the Captain, and I wasn't about to
come between him and what he really wanted.  So I tried pursuing
B'Elanna.  That certainly helped work out my masochistic tendencies,
if nothing else.  But after that time on the planet, when it didn't
happen then, I thought...maybe.  So maybe I do have a chance now.
Gods, I hope so," and on that final thought, Tom walked out of his
quarters, heading for the holodeck.

As he activated the program, he realised that he was a little early.

"Nothing like enthusiasm," he thought wryly.

"Mon petit Thomas," Sandrine greeted him, "It has been a long time,
my handsome one."

"Only a few hours, Sandrine."

"A few hours without your sky-blue eyes, Thomas, is a long time."

Tom blushed, this flirting was a part of the program, it was how he
and Sandrine had always spoken to each other, but sometimes, the
hologram got a bit...over-enthusiastic.  Time for a change of subject.

"Sandrine, may I?"  he indicated the piano.

"Of course mon petite.  You know I love to hear you play."

Tom smiled, and sat down, running through a few exercises, it had
been a while.  He didn't notice Chakotay enter the holodeck, and
said, "If you were here now, Chakotay, I'd say that this song always
makes me think of you," and he began to play.

You're the bravest of hearts,
You're the strongest of souls,
You're my light in the dark,
You're the place I call home,
You can say it's all right, but I know that you're breaking up inside,
I see it in your eyes,
Even you face the night afraid and alone,
That's why I'll be here.

When the storm rises up,
When the shadows descend,
Every beat of my heart,
Every day without end,
Every second I live,
That's the promise I make,
Baby that's what I'll give,
If that's what it takes.

You can sleep in my arms,
You don't have to explain,
When your heart's crying out,
Baby whisper my name,
Cause I've reached out for you when the thunder is crashing up above,
You've given me your love,
When you smile like the sun that shines through the pain,
That's why I'll be there.

When the storm rises up,
When the shadows descend,
Every beat of my heart,
Every day without end,
I will stand like a rock,
I will bend till I break,
Till there's no more to give,
If that's what it takes,
I will risk everything,
I will fight,
I will bleed,
I will lay down my life,
If that's what you need,
Every second I live,
That's the promise I make,
Baby that's what I'll give,
If that's what it takes.

Through the wind and the rain,
Through the smoke and the fire,
When the fear rises up,
When the wave's ever higher,
I will lay down my heart, my body, my soul,
I will hold on all night and never let go,
Every second I live,
That's the promise I make,
Baby that's what I'll give,
If that's what it takes.

If that's what it takes,
Every day,
If that's what it takes,
Every day.

Chakotay applauded as Tom finished the song.

"Chakotay, how long have you been here?"

"I got here just before you began playing.  That song really makes
you think of me?"

"Always.  Whatever it takes, I'll give to help you, Chakotay."

"And I'll do the same for you, Tom."

"Chakotay, I have to ask this, why did you kiss me?"

"I presume you mean aside from the fact that I wanted to?  Well, I
was just so relieved when you came back to us...to me in one piece,
with the ship, no less, that I just *had* to do it.  I know it wasn't
exactly the time or place...but I won't apologise.  I think that's
what finally got me to do it, Tom, the feelings that rushed up inside
me when I saw you."

"How about trying it again, just us?"

"What about Sandrine?"

"Computer, delete holocharacter Sandrine," and she winked out of
existence.

Chakotay pulled Tom to him, covering his mouth with his lush, full
lips.  Their tongues met, and tangled around each other.  Chakotay
began to unbutton Tom's shirt, never ceasing the kiss.  He slipped
the shirt off Tom's shoulders, moving his lips over Tom's neck and
shoulders, then began unbuttoning Tom's jeans. When he got the
jeans off, he smiled to see that Tom hadn't worn any underwear, and
drew back to smile at him.

"I usually don't, unless I'm in uniform," he said, gasping as Chakotay
wrapped a hand around his straining erection.  Chakotay smiled, and
pulled a pillow off the couch, placing it under his knees.  He then
immediately took Tom into his mouth.  Tom screamed at the first
touch of Chakotay's tongue on his heated flesh, bucking his hips
forward.  Chakotay opened his mouth and swallowed Tom whole.  A
few strokes of Chakotay's tongue, and Tom was coming, with a
guttural roar that Chakotay would swear was audible over the entire
ship.

The two men collapsed together onto the couch, Chakotay stroking
Tom gently as he came down from the heights of passion.

"Chakotay, that was..."

"Thank you," Chakotay smiled, and leaned in to kiss Tom again.
Tom then began to undress Chakotay, taking off the shirt and
trousers he was wearing.  Chakotay gasped as Tom began stroking
his heated erection.  Tom kissed him passionately, stroking him
gently, then more firmly as he began to gasp and moan.  One more
particularly inventive movement of Tom's fingers, and Chakotay was
coming all over his hand, uttering cries of pleasure as he did.

"Wow," Chakotay said, "I've *never* felt this way before, Tom."

"Neither have I, Chakotay.  I love you.  I'm sorry if that's too
soon..."

"It's *never* too soon, Tom.  I love you, too.  Now," he said, as
Tom's breathing started to even out, "I think we need to go back to
your quarters.  I don't think the next person who has booked
holodeck time will be particularly enthused to find the two of us in
here, naked."

Tom grinned at that, "I happen to know that it's the Captain.  Better
not tempt fate..or her."

Chakotay smiled and called for the computer to beam them back to
Tom's cabin.  When they got there, they barely had time to get to the
bed before they fell asleep.

---

The End