The BLTS Archive- Heaven In Hell

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This is a Paris/Kim story, rated PG-13, I think. It assumes they have
been an established couple for several months. This takes place during
the "Year of Hell" and has some minor spoilers from Part I.

This is my first such story so please bear that in mind as you read.
Many thanks to Amirin for encouragement and extremely constructive
comments. You wouldn't be reading this without her!

Let's see, Paramount owns it all; the story, the characters, the ship,
the episode, everything except most of this story. I just HAD to write
this and do not mean to infringe on anyone or anything. I just love
these characters. And love to have them love each other.

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Walking down the darkened corridors was not easy. Emergency lighting
was not sufficient to navigate around all the debris scattered
everywhere. Tom Paris stumbled over a piece of conduit, suppressing
the urge to curse at the mess. Time and energy were not available to
do anything other than the essentials, so the rubble on the floors
would just have to wait. Besides, this was the first free time Tom had
enjoyed in far too long and he did not know how long it would last. He
was intent on finding Harry Kim.

Traversing Krenim space had been a continuing nightmare and the senior
staff had carried the brunt of the load. Tom and Harry had not had
very much time together. Injuries to many of the crew meant working
overlong hours. When there was finally time off duty, all they could
do was fall asleep in exhaustion. There was not even the comfort of
holding each other in sleep. Because several decks were without life
support, there were few private quarters, nowhere to go to spend
intimate time together. All of the officers, except Captain Janeway,
Chakotay and Tuvok, were sharing quarters; ten or twelve together.
Cots were placed in every available space in a room, even double
tiered where necessary. Tom had never had to share such close quarters
with so many people. The lack of privacy would have been disturbing at
any time. The fact that it separated him from Harry made it almost
intolerable.

Tom's emotional reserves were nearly depleted. He had to hold and be
held, to feel Harry in his arms. This might be the only time they had.
To make matters worse, since the internal communications system was
one of the casualties, Tom had to use precious time in tracking down
Harry on his own.

Rounding a curve in the corridor, Tom almost tripped over a pair of
legs. Startled, he stared down, realizing with relief that the rest of
the body was hidden by a wall panel. Frustrated oaths were coming from
the invisible person.

"Excuse me. Could you use some help?" he asked, not recognizing the
legs or the muffled voice.

A sudden spark and strangled yelp from behind the panel spurred him to
action. Grabbing the exposed legs, he pulled the body into the open.
Out came a disheveled B'Elanna Torres, frowning fiercely as she held
her right hand tightly with her left.

"Are you okay?" questioned Tom, trying to decide whether to show his
concern or to give in to the desire to laugh. Torres was obviously not
seriously hurt and she did make quite a sight; stretched out on the
deck, face smudged with who knew what, in a wrinkled uniform. The
concerned look won out, but he couldn't keep the twinkle from his
eyes. He reached out a hand to help Torres to her feet.

"No, I'm not all right," she growled, examining the palm of her hand.
"But I'll live. Why do we even bother? Some of these systems are
beyond repair at this point." She broke off her tirade long enough to
scowl at Tom. "What are you doing here? Don't tell me navigational
controls are out again. I'm telling you, Tom, there isn't much more we
can do to keep things running ..."

Tom held up his hands to stem the flow of words. "No, navigational
controls are not out. At least, they were working when I was relieved
a short time ago. Actually, I was looking for Harry. You wouldn't
happen to know where he is?"

"Yes, I sent him around to the next juncture to try and find which
relay is fouled up this time. He's supposed to be back by now. Can you
wait or do you want me to give him a message?"

Tom tried very hard to keep the disappointment off his face. He knew
that Voyager's survival depended on everyone working to keep things
repaired. It was just that he had really been counting on time with
his lover. He could wait and see him for a few minutes, maybe steal a
quick hug. But he needed more than that and was afraid he would not be
able to let Harry get back to work if he ever got his hands on him!

Looking down, he schooled his features into casual lines and laughed
softly. "Just tell him I'm sorry I missed him. Again. And I'll try and
catch up with him for dinner."

Silence greeted his response. Glancing up, he saw Torres watching him
with a small smile. "Come on, Paris. Don't you know by now you can't
fool me? What's going on?"

Grinning a little self consciously, he ran his fingers through his
hair. "Sorry. It's been a while since Harry and I have had time
together and I was hoping to find him free. But, that's okay. Ship's
business first." Innocently opening his eyes wide, he said, "Maybe I
could help you two find the problem and that would speed things up.
Three heads can be better than two!"

Torres snorted, not even trying to hide her amusement. "Sure. I can
see it now. Send you two off in a Jefferies tube and no one would see
you for a week. And when we did, you wouldn't be in any shape to
function! I can do this myself. Go find Harry and have some fun."

The smile slipped off Tom's face. For a moment, he didn't say
anything. Then, in a soft voice, he answered his friend. "Thanks,
B'Elanna. That means more to me than you know. But you need Harry's
help right now and I can wait. Tell him I'll be in the mess hall when
you get finished." Reaching out his arms, he gathered Torres in for a
quick hug.

Her voice muffled by Tom's shoulder, Torres said, "Tom, the offer
wasn't just for you, as much as I can see you need time with Harry.
It's for him, too. Although he's doing a good job of hiding it, I
think Harry's about at the end of his rope."

Tom pulled back a little, looking down at her with anxious eyes. "What
do you mean?"

"Don't look so worried! Things are not that bad. It's just that, you
two spent so much time together before this 'Year of Hell' that Harry
is having trouble coping on his own. Much of his emotional strength
comes from you." Seeing Tom about to protest, Torres placed a hand on
his shoulder. "Now wait. Don't say anything. I know he's capable of
dealing with this. He's strong. But he needs you, too. And that's
okay! Harry is a fixer, he wants everything to run the way it is
supposed to. If it doesn't, he wants to fix it. That's increasingly
more impossible each day. And there is precious little to relieve the
tension. You are his safety valve, much as he is for you. Now pressure
is building up to the exploding point."

Just then, Harry Kim came around the bend in the corridor. His
exhausted face lit up when he saw Tom, then faded into a frown when he
saw the serious expressions his two friends wore. His pace quickened
as he approached them. "What's wrong? Are you two okay? Tom?"

With a huge grin and shining eyes transforming his face, Tom turned
from Torres and wrapped Harry in a fierce hug. "Everything is perfect,
now. I have missed you, Harry, so I have come to take you away from
all this!" In his exuberance, he squeezed harder.

"Whoa," croaked Harry. "I think I'm going to need those ribs intact."
As the arm pressure eased fractionally, he smiled at Tom. "I take it
Chakotay unchained you from the helm for a break. Must be nice to have
a compassionate task master," he quipped, grinning at Torres over
Tom's shoulder.

"Be nice, Harry," admonished Tom. "I just about had your task master
talked into giving you some time off. Ouch!" he yelped as B'Elanna
whacked him on his back. "What was that for?"

"Just expressing my opinion of your sense of humor, such as it is.
Now, go on and get out of here before another disaster strikes."
Torres turned back toward the wall panel.

Harry glanced at Tom, then half turned in his arms, not willing to let
go completely. "But, B'Elanna, what about the relays? I think I found
the problem area." He held out the PADD that had gone unnoticed in his
left hand. "I had to crawl about half way in, but I found what appears
to be a short ..."

"Starfleet," interrupted Torres. "Is it all on the PADD?" At Harry's
nod, she continued, "Okay, I'll figure it out. Just go with Tom and
relax for a couple of hours. There isn't anything that can't wait that
long. If an emergency arises that I need you for, I'll come find you.
Otherwise, go. Try and forget all this for at least a little while."
The last few words sounded a little choked and Torres quickly faced
the panel again.

Harry looked worriedly at Tom, then started to move toward her.
Stopping him with a soft touch on his arm, Tom reached out with his
other hand and laid it gently on the engineer's shoulder. "Thanks,
B'Elanna. If you need us, Chakotay will know where to find us.
Otherwise, we'll see you in a few hours." With a final small  squeeze,
he stepped back, took Harry's hand and began walking away.

Torres stayed where she was, not turning around as they left.

---

Tom walked quickly down the dim corridor, holding tightly to Harry's
hand, not quite  pulling him along. His face was set in determined,
almost grim lines. Long legs covered more  ground than shorter ones,
causing Harry to all but jog to keep up. After a few minutes and
an increase in the pace, he broke the silence.

"Tom, you're going to wear me out before we get where we're going. I'm
not going to have breath left to talk .. or whatever!" he said,
grinning.

Tom stopped so abruptly that Harry bumped into him. Catching him
before he fell, Tom laughed softly and answered, "We sure can't have
that. Maybe I ought to carry you the rest of the way, so you'll have
energy to talk." He bent down, ready to put action to his words.

Pushing him away, Harry chuckled. "Thanks, but I don't think that's
necessary. I'll be fine if we just walk instead of race. Where are we
going anyway? We aren't headed toward the mess hall. And why warp
speed?"

Straightening up, Tom gazed at his lover for a moment, then reached
over to put both hands on either side of his head. All signs of humor
left his face, leaving behind weariness and longing. As he gently
caressed Harry's cheek with his thumb, he said, "Because I need you,
Harry. I want to hold you, feel you in my arms and show you how much I
love you. I don't want any chance of interruptions. So, we're going to
Chakotay's quarters."

Startled brown eyes met blue ones. "Chakotay's! How did you manage
that? That's one of the few private places left on board. What did you
have to promise him in return for this favor?"

Frowning slightly, Tom answered seriously, "Actually, he offered it to
me. When I was relieved earlier, he stopped me and asked if you and I
had had any time together lately. I was just getting ready to make a
joke ..." He paused at Harry's soft sound of protest. "I know, I know,
speaking before my brain's engaged. But I was just surprised that he
had asked, out of the blue like that. Then I saw his expression. He
looked so serious, sad really. You know, Harry, I think something
happened between Chakotay and the Captain. And I don't think it was
good. They've been very formal with each other, almost curt. Anyway,
he offered the use of his quarters for a few hours. I didn't know what
to say. It was almost as if he would feel better if someone were happy
for a little while."

Shaking his head a little self consciously at this uncharacteristic
analysis, he glanced over at Harry. Shrugging slightly, he continued.
"What could I say but yes! Chakotay said he'd take care of things and
he'd know where to find us if we were needed. I started to thank him
but he just shook his head and turned away. So, I came looking for
you."

Harry gazed into incredible blue eyes, so full of need, desire and
love. Leaning in for a soft kiss, he murmured, "Then what are we
waiting for? We sure don't want to disobey the Commander's *order*.
Let's go." He set off down the corridor, pulling a laughing Tom along
with him.

---

The two young men, hands still clasped tightly together, reached the
Commander's quarters without meeting anyone along the way. Due to
another faulty system, the door had to be opened manually. Tom pushed
on the panels, allowing enough room for Harry to move through. He
followed, with the door closing behind him. The locking mechanism no
longer functioned, either, but that was not a serious consideration.
Who would enter Chakotay's quarters without permission?

Harry had only moved a short distance into the living area. Coming up
behind him, Tom pulled him into an embrace, nuzzling his neck. It felt
so good to be able to hold him, kiss him, know that they were finally
alone, even if just for a short while. The kisses continued as the
pilot's confident hands began caressing Harry's chest, moving closer
to the fastener near the neck. His movements were halted as the
younger man shifted, turning so he could put his arms around Tom's
neck, laying his cheek on the padded shoulder.

"In a minute, Tom," murmured Harry. "I just want to feel your arms
around me for a little while. It seems like years since we've been
able to do this. And I wasn't sure it would ever happen again. So many
people have been killed or injured. Every time we're attacked and I
can't see you, I keep expecting someone to come up and tell me you've
been hurt, or ..." With a slight shudder he stopped talking, pressing
himself to his lover's body. Strong, comforting arms pulled him even
closer.

"Hey, Harry. It's all right. Nothing's happened to me or to you. Can't
say that it won't but all we ever have is right now, anyway. Let's try
to forget about what could happen. Pretend this is that holodeck
program you gave me for my birthday, the one with the fireplace and
all those cushions. How the candles scented the air and the only light
came from the flickering flames. They made you look all golden skin
and dark eyes. You were so beautiful. You are so beautiful."

As he quietly set the scene with his words, his comforting strokes on
Harry's back began to change in intensity. Moving up to familiar broad
shoulders, he pushed Harry slightly away so he could see his face.
Ebony eyes, unnaturally bright with unshed tears, locked onto his own,
so different in hue but so similar in passion.

"Harry," he breathed. "You are my life. No matter what happens, know
that you are everything to me. These last several months with you have
made all the rest of my life worth while, because it led me to you. I
want to show you what this means to me. Let me love you." Tom bent his
head, softly claiming Harry's mouth with his own. The kiss gradually
changed from gentle to firm to almost frantic. Hands began moving,
stroking, trying to pull the other body impossibly closer.

Not even attempting to get to the sofa, the two men sank to their
knees where they were. Pale hands moved from caressing dark hair to
gently stroking trembling arms. Tom wanted to touch every part of
Harry and something was preventing that. The uniform had to go and 
now! He began to remove the clothes, uncovering that wonderful skin,
stopping to caress each part with fingers and lips. Harry was
breathing in short gasps, becoming lost in the sensations generated by
those talented, loving hands. He wanted to reciprocate but couldn't
seem to make his body do what he wanted. It was reacting on its own to
Tom's actions.

"It's okay, Harry. Let me do this for you." Tom gently lowered Harry
to the floor, gazing at the now naked body stretched before him. His
hands fumbled at his own uniform, desperate to feel that warm skin
next to his. Soon, nothing separated the two as they wrapped
themselves around each other, oblivious to the chill in the air,
creating their own warmth, their own universe. As they made love to
each other, Tom and Harry were aware only of the heat, passion and
love emanating from the other half of their whole. The rest of the
world ceased to exist for them. Time stood still.

---

A soft noise marred the silence. A shape darker than the room moved
quietly toward the two men entwined on the sofa. A hand reached out to
touch the shoulder of the blond one, just above the patterned blanket
that covered them. The sleeper came awake slowly, blinking in
confusion, trying to figure out where he was.

"Tom, sorry I can't give you more time, but I need you on the bridge."
Chakotay whispered apologetically, giving Tom a chance to completely
wake up.

"Chakotay? Um, okay, that's okay." Still a little groggy, Tom slowly
raised up on his elbow, trying not to wake Harry. Rubbing his free
hand across his face,he asked, "Do you need Harry, too, or can he
sleep a little longer?" His eyes began to clear, indicating the return
to full awareness.

"No, he can stay here for a while. Seven is working on temporal
shields and I need you at the helm. I'm sorry," he repeated. "You two
didn't have very long in here."

Tom smiled at the Commander. "Yeah, but what we did have was worth it.
Thanks for letting us use your quarters."

The warm body next to him stirred and a tousled head looked up. "Tom,
what's going on? Is something wrong?"

"No, Harry. Chakotay needs me on the bridge. Go back to sleep. You're
still off duty." Tom gently pushed the hair out of Harry's eyes and
placed a quick kiss on his forehead. Chakotay began to move away,
giving the two a few more minutes together. They didn't notice.

Harry's hand came up to caress a pale cheek. "That's okay. I'm awake
now. I'll come with you. I'm not ready to let you out of my sight
again." He grinned at the expression that flitted across his lover's
face. "Oh, no you don't. Time's up and the Commander is waiting for
us. One last kiss will have to suffice." He leaned toward Tom, meaning
to give him a quick kiss and get up. However, once they began, neither
one seemed to be able to break away. The kiss deepened, going on until
they finally had to come up for air. With flushed faces and rapid
breathing, they couldn't stop staring at each other.

"Battle stations. Krenim ships approaching!"

The voice of the captain made all three men jump. "I guess B'Elanna
got the comm system back on line," gasped Harry, as he and Tom leaped
off the couch, locating and pulling on uniforms that had been
scattered about. Commander Chakotay was already through the door and
on his way to the bridge. Tom and Harry ran out behind him, leaving
the patterned blanket in a heap on the floor.

---

Reaching the bridge, Tom slid into his seat at the conn as Harry
sprinted to what was left of operations. Tuvok groped his way to his
station. Everyone was in place.

"You know the routine," barked a disheveled Captain Janeway.

"Evasive maneuvers," groused Tom, trying to coax more speed out of
sluggish engines.

The Krenim ships attacked, punishing an already battered Voyager. Her
pilot wondered if this would be the final blow. Roughly pushing that
thought aside, he just kept flying. His concentration was interrupted
by Harry's announcement of a temporal wave heading toward them. As it
passed over, Seven's reworked shields protected their ship. Tom just
had time to turn around and flash Harry a grin before the next blow
came.

"A ship is closing in on us!" exclaimed Harry. "It's huge!" He stared
at Tom with fear in his eyes, then looked down at his controls. "That
entire vessel's in a state of temporal flux. It's like they exist
outside space time."

Tom turned back to his controls. He could feel Chakotay move up close
behind him. "They're scanning us." As soon as he spoke the words, he
felt the tingle of a transporter device. Before he vanished
completely, he saw Harry's horrified expression and heard that beloved
voice yell, "Tom! Nooooo!" Then everything he knew and loved
disappeared.

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The End