by Kamin
---

Disclaimer: Paramount owns these characters. Paramount is God. I don't know why Paramount has forsaken us, but then again, Paramount is a wrathful god.

Dedication: To William Faulkner, for the title, and Elton John, for the song. Also thanks to the good folks at "General Hospital" for names.

Setting: About a month after "The Chute." This means a little angst for flavor, and a lotta mush, because I'm like that. I should point out that in my universe, the Voyager storyline took a slightly different turn after "The Chute." None of this P/T crap. If they're going to pair B'Elanna with someone, it should be Harry. They have the chemistry.

Author's Note: Well, after months of lurking, I'm finally brave enough to try posting one. Please be kind. Comments, complaints, hugs, and fruit baskets can be sent to Kamin5@worldnet.att.ne.. Flames will be met with snappy comebacks. If you're a gay man in VA, call me!

---

B'Elanna Torres walked into the mess hall with all the subtlety she could muster, flopping down at her usual table, next to Harry Kim and across from Tom Paris.

"Thomas Eugene Paris, is there some underlying order to the way you're sleeping through my department, or is it truly random?"

"Just saving the best for last B'Ela--Oof!" He managed to receive the kick to shins without screaming in pain, which was more than many of the people who had gotten in her way could say.

"In the past two weeks, you've had Ensign Coe, Lt. Barrett, and Crewman Jensen. And judging by what I heard Henley and Chell discussing in the turbolift this morning, I think I can add Alexis Davis to the list as well. And let's not forget your normal Wednesday encounters with Megan and Jenny." B'Elanna didn't miss the strangled look on Harry's face when she mentioned Davis, a pretty half-Bajoran.

"Well, let's just say that on this ship, a fellow can do all right for himself," said Tom, with his usual smugness. "And what's with the sudden interest in my sex life?"

"Tom, I don't mean to underscore this, but do you realize how small the gene pool on this ship is to begin with? We don't need to make it any smaller."

"B'Ela, I'm not interested in settling down with any or all of them. I just want to have a little fun, that's all."

"A little fun? Tom, there are about 150 people on this ship, split more or less evenly between males and females, with three androgynous beings. Among the women, there's the captain, who is off limits, Samantha Wildman, who, in her charming, naïve way, honestly thinks she, her husband, and Spike will all be a family again before Spike is a grandmother, Kes who is involved with Neelix--"

"Hold off on the last one," Tom interjected, "Jenny lives under Kes, and she told me that Kes and Neelix have been arguing more and more, and that they had a fight a few nights ago, which culminated in Kes crying herself to sleep."

"Gods Tom, you sound like you enjoy it!"

"I didn't say that; I was just reporting a little gossip. To continue?"

"And then there's me, who, excuse me here Tom, but you and I would never work."

"And why is that?"

"Because I'm looking for a little more than unzip, tackle out, zip, see- ya-next-year-babe. Granted, there are some people on this ship, like a certain pair of sisters in Stellar Cartography, who'll need to be buried in Y-shaped coffins, but I'm not one of them." With this, B'Elanna smacked her hand down on the table, sending dishes and silverware flying. Every eye in the room turned towards the three at the table.

"B'Elanna, you are not my mother, my priest, or my psychologist. When I want advice on my sex life, I'll ask. Now if you'll excuse me, I'm late for duty." Tom stormed out of the mess hall.

Well, that could have gone better, B'Elanna thought. At least he heard me.

"B'Ela, was all that really necessary?" asked Harry.

"I don't know, Harry. But I am worried about him." Neelix shuffled over, and set down something that loosely resembled scrambled eggs and poured her a cup of coffee. She took a bite and grimaced. The stuff loosely tasted like duranium shavings mixed with deuterium. At least the coffee was hot.

"Worried? About old Tom "Never-Met-a-Woman-Who-Didn't-Like-Me" Paris? It's not like he's acting out of character." Harry set to work on his own duranium and deuterium omelet.

"That's just it, Starfleet. He is acting out of character. Okay, he's always been one to drop trou at the first sign of interest. But not like this. It's just not like him." A lot Iadetrian spice grass and the stuff was almost palatable. "I think it must have something to do with your time in the Akritrian prison. Did anything happen that you haven't told me?"

"Let's see, it was a close approximation of Hell. The clamps had us at each other's throats every minute. I nearly killed him. That about do it?" Harry's voice broke on the last syllable.

"Look, Harry, I'm sorry to make you rehash all this, but I just wanted to see if I could get through to him before I spoke to Chakotay or the Captain." B'Elanna took a deep breath, and, with effort, finished her egg-like substance.

"You wouldn't really take this to them, would you?" Harry asked, horrified.

"Yes I would, Harry. Tom's behavoir just isn't healthy. I think there's something really wrong with him, and I don't think I could tell the Doctor or Kes. For all his knowledge, the Doctor doesn't have a whole lot of tact, and Kes is just a little too syrupy to deal with something like this," she said, hoping to get a smile out of Harry. She was rewarded with a small, sad smile on the young Asian's beautiful face. This doesn't look good, she thought. "Harry, are you okay? You looked a little shocked when I mentioned Tom's encounter with Crewman Davis. Do you--?" She trailed off.

"Yes, but. . . but not like you think." Harry sounded like he was trying hard not to cry.

"Meaning what?" Having one friend on the skids was bad enough, but two was really a handful.

"Meaning. . . B'Ela, I'm not jealous of Tom. I'm jealous of Alexis," he sputtered before a tear slipped down his cheek.

---

I hope my jaw isn't open as wide as it feels, B'Elanna thought. Her second thought was that the mess hall really wasn't the place to be discussing this with Harry. "Why don't we go back to my quarters and talk?" she asked the young Ensign, who looked like he was on the verge of a full blown cry-fest. She thanked Neelix for breakfast, if one could call it that, and steered Harry out the door and into the turbolift.

Before they had reached B'Elanna's deck, the lift abruptly stopped. Megan Delaney and Ensign Simone Hardy, the helmsman on Delta-shift, entered giggling and gleefully comparing notes on Lt. Paris's sexual equipment.

When all this is over, I'm going to kill them, B'Elanna thought.

"And did you notice that cute mole he's got right above--Oh, hi B'Elanna, hi Harry," Megan said.

"Good. Morning. Megan," B'Elanna choked out tersely.

"Simone and I were just discussing Tom. He's really on a Casanova streak, isn't he?" asked Megan, not noticing the Harry was starting very intensely at his boots.

"I hadn't noticed," B'Elanna said.

"You're kidding. He's already slept with half of your department, and most of Gamma-shift." I try so hard not to think of her as a slut, B'Elanna thought, I give up.

B'Elanna leaned close to Megan. "If you say another word about Tom, I'm going to wrap your intestines around the warp core," she said viciously.

"Um, okay, Lt. Torres." Megan and Simone exited on Deck 4; B'Elanna heard Simone whisper "Klingon mating urge," and Megan snickering.

Harry dissolved into tears.

Oh, gods, B'Elanna thought. "Halt."

The lift slowed to a stop, and B'Elanna turned to Harry. "Hold it together for just three more minutes, please, Harry."

Harry swallowed hard, and choked back the tears.

"Resume." The lift deposited them on Deck 6, and in under three minutes, B'Elanna had sat Harry on her bed.

She put her arm around his shoulder. "Okay Starfleet, cry."

Harry sat on her bed, racked with sobs for about five minutes. B'Elanna pulled away long enough to get two cups of chamomile tea from the replicator. "Do you want to talk about it?"

"Oh, B'Ela, I love him so much, and I. . . " he trailed off.

"Okay, Starfleet, one thing at a time. I take it this love thing isn't a recent development."

Harry shook his head. "I just wasn't sure until prison. I think it started last year, when I came back from the other timeline."

"The one where you didn't get posted to Voyager and stayed in San Francisco with Libby."

"Yeah. The Tom from that timeline sacrificed himself to save me, B'Ela. That was what triggered it."

"But what about Libby?" B'Elanna asked, remembering the fiancée Harry had once been so devoted to.

"Well, seeing that Earth, even if it wasn't our Earth, assumed that everyone aboard was killed in a plasma storm in the Badlands made me realize that it wasn't fair of me to expect Libby to be faithful to someone she thought was dead, and it wasn't realistic to expect myself to remain faithful to her for. . . however long we're going to be out here. So I decided to assume the reverse: As far as I'm concerned everyone back home, my parents, Libby, my best friend Danny Byrd, everyone, is dead. If we do find a wormhole, or some fabulous new propulsion system, then that'll change, but for right now, the only family I have left is on this ship."

"Including Tom?"

"Especially Tom. B'Elanna, he, well, a version of himself, gave his life to see me get home. He kept you safe in that Viidean prison. He kept me safe in the Akritirian prison--"

"Until he got stabbed." B'Elanna interjected.

"Until then. And suddenly, I was doing the protecting. I didn't do that good a job."

"You both survived, didn't you?" asked B'Elanna.

"Yes, but. . . " Harry paused, and nearly began crying again, "But I nearly killed him, B'Ela."

"You what?" B'Elanna asked with disbelief.

"He disassembled the pipe I needed to short-circuit the force-field protecting the chute. I found him in the process of doing it, and I could have killed him. The first thought I had after that I nearly killed the man I love." Harry said slowly.

"But you didn't, Harry."

"But I nearly did. And Zio certainly encouraged me."

"Zio was the man who's shelter you stayed in, right? The one you traded your boots to for bandages?"

"Yeah, the one I traded. . . my boots for. . . " Harry trailed off.

"Harry, you can't keep this inside you forever. Have you tried talking to Tom about it?"

"He isn't going to listen, B'Ela," said Harry, "He's too busy with. . . other pursuits."

"So I'm not the only one who noticed?" asked B'Elanna.

"No, but I can't be the one who says anything to him. I can't begrudge him anything after what I nearly did."

"Oh, Harry--" B'Elanna was cut off by a comm system chirp.

"All senior officers report to the briefing room immediately," came Captain Janeway's crisp voice.

"That means us, Starfleet. Can you make it?" asked B'Elanna.

"Yeah, I think I'm going to be okay," said Harry, not sounding okay in the slightest.

The pair marched out of B'Elanna's quarters and into the turbolift. Please, gods don't let us run into any more of Tom's conquests, B'Elanna thought. I would hate to explain Harry's condition to the Captain.

The lift doors snapped open on the bridge, where Tom and Chakotay were just heading turning over their stations. Tom handed Conn over to Ensign Lesley Webber, flashing her the patented Paris smile. Chalk another one up for him, B'Elanna thought.

B'Elanna noticed that Tom sat as far away from her at the briefing table as was humanly possible. The Captain walked in, and the entire room seemed to snap to attention.

Janeway walked over to one of the display screens and called up some sensor readings. "Okay people, we need to move quickly on this. Long- range sensors have picked up what seems to be a large deposit of duranium and tritanium in an asteroid belt in a system about ten lightdays from us. With all the recent damage, due to both the Kazon attacks and the encounter with the duplicate Voyager have left us a little short on materials for hull repair. So I've decided to take a little detour to mine some."

B'Elanna spoke up. "I don't have anything to refine the ore ready, but that shouldn't matter. We can just mine a large supply, and then process it down in a few weeks. That shouldn't be a problem."

"Very good, B'Elanna. But that isn't the problem. Everything we know about the asteroid belt comes from what sensors can pick on the outer fringes of the belt. For some reason, whether it's interference caused by the star the belt orbits, or some form of charged plasma field within the system, sensors can't penetrate more than 2 kilometers into the asteroid belt." Janeway said, displaying the anomaly on the screen.

"So what do you suggest, Captain?" asked Chakotay.

"I don't want to risk taking the ship in until we know more about what we're dealing with, so, Mr. Paris, you're going to pilot a shuttle into the belt while Voyager remains in orbit of one of the system's gas giants. Mr. Kim will accompany you, to make adjustment and take sensor readings so we get some idea of what's going on. B'Elanna, I want you to reinforce one of the shuttles; add a little more armor against the interference. Is that clear? Dismissed."

---

The door to the shuttlebay opened. Harry walked inside, to find B'Elanna and her team going over the modifications to the shuttle one last time. She turned when she saw Harry. "We've checked and rechecked the modifications. Everything looks like it's in working order. The only thing you might have problems with is the communications equipment. The radiation from within the asteroid belt will most likely have a dampening effect. So I had an interplexing beacon equipped on the shuttle's underbelly. If you run into trouble, activate it. It'll release an ionic pulse at one frequency in nearly every direction. Voyager will be monitoring that frequency. If we pick something up, we'll get a fix on your position, and Chakotay and I will come in another shuttle to get you. The only problem is that it takes an enormous amount of energy. You won't have enough power for thrusters, or life support beyond minimal levels. Understood?"

"Sure, B'Elanna. Thanks."

"Oh, and one more thing, you may have to do minute configuring of the sensors to get a completely accurate picture of what's going on out there, but I trust you know how to do that. Lt. Paris is onboard doing a pre-flight check. I've gone over all this with him, so you should be about ready to leave." She lowered her voice. "Good luck, Starfleet. I think you're gonna need it."

With that, B'Elanna and her team cleared off the flight deck. Harry drew a deep breath, and stepped into the shuttle.

Tom was seated at the pilot's station, his fingers flying over the console in a rush to complete the pre-flight check. "Sit down and let's get the show on the road," he said without looking up.

Harry sat and called up a list of the modifications B'Elanna had made. The shuttles sensors had been equipped with a device which allowed them to block certain frequencies of radiation. He knew she had also installed one on Voyager's forward sensor array, but until he got into the asteroid belt and discovered which frequencies to block, they wouldn't do anyone any good.

Giving the shuttle's engines one last approving nod, Tom keyed for communication with the bridge. "Bridge, this is shuttle James Cook requesting permission to depart."

"This is the Captain, Tom," came Janeway's voice. "Permission to depart granted. Be careful with the shuttle. I don't have to remind you that we're starting to run out."

"Yes, ma'am. We'll take care of her. I'll contact you again before we enter the asteroid belt. Paris out."

The shuttlebay doors slowly opened and the bay depressurized. Tom's hands danced across the console, the thrusters flared, and the shuttle propelled itself out of the ship. When the shuttle had reached a distance of 500 meters from Voyager, Tom activated the impulse engines, and the shuttle moved towards the asteroid belt at a quick sublight clip.

"Do you believe B'Elanna this morning?" Tom began. "Where does she get off?"

Harry's brow furrowed. "Tom, she's just worried about you. To tell you the truth, I'm a little concerned myself."

"Don't you fucking start in on me too," snapped Tom.

"Tom, will you please talk to me. What's wrong?" Harry leaned towards Tom.

"Nothing's wrong Harry! All I want is to have a good time. Is that too much to ask?" Tom turned and stared intensely at his console.

"Something is wrong, Tom," Harry said. "Does this have something to do with prison? You haven't really talked to me since the Captain sprang us. What happened?"

"It's nothing to do with prison, Harry. I just like to party and have a good time."

"Tom, at this rate, you'll have fucked every woman on the ship in a month, and I'm counting the Captain, Sammie Wildman, and B'Elanna. Before prison you were never this aggressively heterosex--Oh, dear Gods. " Harry drew a breath. "That's it, isn't it? You feel like prison took your manhood, and now you have to recapture it. What happened before I got there, Tom? Where you raped?"

Tom put his head in his hands and drew several deep breaths, before he could speak. When he finally did, it was in a strange, distant voice. "Not on Akritiria. It was years ago, in New Zealand. It was my first night, and my cellmates where these two burly guys. Stephan and Luke were their names. I was scared out of my mind. When I got there, they had seemed really friendly and I let my guard down." Tom swallowed hard, then continued. "It was about an hour after lights out, and I was lying in my bunk, just thinking. Time moved slower in that night than it every has for me. You really don't know how slow time can move until you spend your first night alone in prison. I was just lying there, thinking about what an idiot I was when it happened. Stephan grabbed me and held me down while Luke pulled down my pants and fucked me up the ass, hard. Then they switched place and did it again. Luke didn't really need to hold me down though. At that point I was too dazed to fight. Someone on the outside would probably say that one of the other times is the worst, but in my mind that was the worst thing that ever happened to me in prison. Because I didn't expect it." Tom started to cry.

Harry was having a hard time keeping from joining him. He reached out a hand put it on his friend's shoulders. "Oh, Tom. . . ."

Tom smacked Harry's hand away. "But that's not even the worst part! The worst part is that was nearly me. I almost became those two men." Harry opened his mouth to speak, but Tom cut him off. "When I saw you come down the chute, I wanted you so badly that I didn't know what else to do. That's why I claimed you. I mean, sure I wanted to keep you safe from those other prisoners, but the biggest part of me wanted the same thing they did. I've tried to rationalize it by saying that it was the clamp, but I know the truth. The truth is that I'm in love with my best friend."

"And the Casanova stuff?" Harry asked quietly.

"I can't be in love with you, Harry. For whatever reason, you are still holding onto the hope that you'll be reunited with Libby before we're all old and gray. So I had to find someone else to love. Even if it was a slut like Megan Delaney." Tom dropped his head into his hands and sobbed.

Harry was having a hard time not joining him. He watched the man he loved crying because he thought that Harry was still carrying a torch for Libby. "Oh, Tom. . . "

Harry reached a hand out to Tom's face, and then, as if possessed, tilted Tom's head upward and kissed him lightly. The two men wrapped their arms around one another, and Tom sobbed into Harry's shoulder. "No more tears, Tom." Harry said firmly.

"Harry?"

Harry took a deep breath before he could tell his best friend what he'd wanted to say for such a long time. "I love you too, Tom."

"Harry, don't--"

"I mean it, Tom. Paris, I've been trying to tell you this for the longest time. I honestly think I've known since I met you. I just wasn't sure until prison. Now I am sure. You're the one I want. Not Libby, not B'Elanna, and especially not the Delaney sisters."

Tom looked like he was gearing up for another cry, but before he could, Harry brushed away the last few tears and gave Tom another soft kiss. "And now, Lt., we have a mission to accomplish."

Tom sat at his console again, and gave Harry a smile big enough to power Voyager's engines for months. "I love you, Harry." He cleared his throat and resumed the mode of The Son of Admiral Gene Paris. Harry opened a channel to Voyager. "John Cook to Voyager," Tom said.

"Voyager here. Go ahead, Tom," came the Captain's voice.

"Captain, we will enter into the dampening field in about five minutes," said Tom. "Any last minute instruction?" "Just this: Be careful, and don't hesitate to use Lt. Torres' beacon if you get into trouble. Good luck." Janeway was at her most commanding.

"Aye, ma'am. John Cook out," Tom turned to Harry. "Well, that's over. Shall we. . . " He reached for Harry.

"No way, Tom. As tempting as your offer is, we have a job to do, besides, someone has to pilot the shuttle."

"Aye, aye sir." Tom's hands returned to his console, but his eyes remained on Harry.

Harry checked over his instruments. "We should enter the field in just under fifteen seconds. I don't know if the navigational sensors will still be able to function, so look sharp."

The shuttle passed beyond the invisible barrier between sight and blindness. Harry's instrument panel went dark, as did Tom's navigational sensors. " Guess that answers your question, Ensign Kim," Tom joked.

Harry's hands began to furiously work across his console, trying to bring the modified sensors online. "How long until you get the new sensors online?" asked Tom.

Harry frowned. "I don't know. The diagnostic equipment has to tell the sensors how the systems are being affected. When that's done, the sensors should know what's happening, and how to compensate. Until then, we're blind, so be care--" The shuttle shuttered as a micrometeroid grazed the hull.

Tom smiled. "Harry, it's me, remember? The man who could pilot his way out of--" The shuttle rocked violently as it was hit broadside by a small asteroid. Inside, the two men jerked about. Harry's console began to spark, and an arc of energy hit him square in the chest. The shuttle began to tumble, drunkenly, end over end.

Tom was the first to recover, and knelt by his friend. Harry's uniform was scorched. "Harry, are you all right?"

Harry got up and shook his head to clear it. "I'm fine, Tom. What's our status?"

Tom checked the few displays that were still functioning. "Shields down, weapons down, propulsion down, sensors down, guidance systems down, communication down, life support functioning at minimal levels."

"There's that at least. Stand by, I'm going to activate B'Elanna's beacon." Harry reached for the console, but Tom grabbed his hand.

Tom pulled Harry up to standing. "Harry, Harry, Harry, what's the rush? We're all alone, no one will miss us for hours, and if I'm figuring right, our tumble pattern will take us out of immediate danger. Let's not let an opportunity like that go to waste."

"Tom Paris, if I didn't know you better, I'd swear you planned this," Harry protested mildly before allowing Tom to lead him aft.

Tom pulled Harry close, into a long kiss. His fingers started at the top of Harry's spine and traced down his neck and into the small of his back. Harry responded in kind, and in doing gently pushed Tom into a sitting position on one of the shuttle's couched. Harry parted from Tom's lips, and slowly kissed down Tom's neck and chin, while unzipping Tom's uniform. Tom squirmed out of the turtleneck, and Harry continued his journey down Tom, kissing his chest, and then the flat muscles of his stomach. Tom's hands were working on Harry's uniform, and he stopped for a minute to stroke Harry's hair. Harry looked up, smiled and then finished getting undressed.

The two men, now completely nude, embraced again. Tom nibbled gently on Harry's nipples, while Harry caressed Tom's back and shoulders. Tom licked down Harry's chest and stomach, before settling in to work on his penis. Tom drew Harry's dick slowly into his mouth, swirling his tongue around the head. He sucked hard, and drew the whole of Harry into his mouth, and down his throat. He moved up and down, and up and down Harry, until Harry arched his back, moaned softly, and came into Tom's mouth. Tom returned his mouth to Harry's, and kissed his lover again.

"Any. . . lubricant?" Tom panted.

"Check. . . the. . . medkit," Harry sighed quietly.

Tom reached into the medkit on the bulkhead and dug through it until her came up with a small tube of lubricant. He handed the tube to Harry, who slathered the stuff on Tom's penis. Harry slowly rolled onto his stomach and spread his legs. Tom kissed Harry's neck and the small of his back, before gently pushing his penis into Harry. I'm inside Harry, he thought, happily. He began to gently thrust his hips against Harry, bringing his dick with it. Harry got the idea, and began to thrust his own hips in time with Tom's. Tom looked down and kissed the small of his lover's back. He laced his fingers through Harry's clenched fists, and continued his work. The two men's intensely built and built, until Tom reached the breaking point. He let out an intense scream of pleasure and came inside Harry. He collapsed against Harry in exhaustion.

"In space, no one can hear you scream," Tom said, remembering on of the late-twentieth century movies he was so fond of.

"I wouldn't be too sure of that, Tom. As loud as you were, they probably heard it all the way back in the Alpha--" Harry stopped speaking abruptly, and his whole body began to twitch.

"Harry? HARRY!" Tom watched in horror as his best friend began shaking. "Harry? Harry, what's wrong?"

Harry attempted to speak. "Tom. . . love you. . . " His eyes rolled back into his head, and he was still.

"Harry, oh shit, please don't die!" Tom grabbed a tricorder from the medkit, and passed it over his friend, only to discover they were still within the dampening field. The tricorder stared back at him, blankly. He put his fingers to Harry's neck and, much to his relief, his friend was not dead.

"Okay, Harry, just hang on." As quickly as he could, Tom dashed to the front of the shuttle and activated the beacon. He returned on Harry's side.

---

Aboard the starship Voyager, Kathryn Janeway tried very hard not to show the uneasiness that had crept into her stomach. This was the twenty- fourth century, and a starship captain should not believe in premonitions. But didn't it seem that Tom and Harry had left an awfully long time ago?

"Captain, we're detecting an ionic pulse matching the signature of the beacon on board Lt. Paris and Ensign Kim's shuttle originating at 125 mark 14," said Ensign Wildman from the science station.

"Commander Chakotay, will you and Lt. Torres--" she stopped once she saw her first officer and chief engineer had entered the turbolift as soon as Wildman began speaking.

God speed, gentlemen, Janeway thought. Superstition or no, prayer never hurt.

---

B'Elanna's fists clenched and unclenched to the quick rhythm of her eight-chambered heart. "Can't this thing go any faster?"

Chakotay, despite inwardly feeling the same as B'Elanna, calmly said "We're pushing it as it is. We'll get there in time, B'Elanna. Have faith."

"With all due respect, Chakotay, that's your job." Still, B'Elanna thought, it's at times like this that I envy you. I wish I could believe in something.

"We're coming up on them now. Are the sensors working?"

B'Elanna's hands traced the familiar route across the console. "They've emerged from the dampening field. All primary and secondary systems are off-line, and life support is barely functioning. I'm reading two human lifesigns, one very faint."

Chakotay tapped his communicator. "Chakotay to Paris."

"Paris here!" came Tom's frantic voice.

"What's your status?"

"We were hit by an asteroid and nearly everything's down. I'm fine, but Harry's really bad. You have to do something!"

"We'll get you in a tractor beam as soon as we're in range. Everything's going to be fine, Tom." Chakotay tried to sound reassuring.

"Commander, please hurry! I think Harry's dying!"

"It'll be fine, Tom. Just hold it together. Chakotay out." He turned to B'Elanna. "Get them in a tractor beam NOW. Chakotay to Voyager."

"Voyager here," came the Captain.

"Captain, can you rendezvous with us? We're having a medical emergency with Harry."

"We'll meet you at 012 mark 45. Voyager out." Though she tried to hide it, the Captain's fright was apparent.

---

"Lay in a course to intercept and engage at full impulse once we break orbit," Janeway barked. "Computer, activate E.M.H. program. Doctor, prepare for incoming casualties."

Webber spoke up from Conn. "Captain, we're out of orbit. We should be within transporter range of the shuttles in fifteen minutes."

I hope to the gods that's fast enough, thought Janeway.

---

Tom had just realized that both he and Harry were completely naked. It didn't matter that he wanted to shout how much he loved Harry loud enough for the entire Delta-Quadrant to hear. This was not the way to go about it. He tried to wrangle Harry back into his uniform, but he couldn't do it without moving Harry. From what little he remembered from his days as Voyager's field medic, he knew he shouldn't disturb Harry. He had to settle for covering Harry with a sheet. He dressed himself, and then knelt by Harry, stroking his hair, and silently begging the universe not to take everything away from him.

Sometime later, he wasn't sure how much later, he was dimly aware of hearing the Captain's voice say "Stand by for transport," and the shuttle disappearing in shimmering effect.

---

"Transportcomplete," droned Tuvok from his station. " Mr. Paris and En. Kim are aboard."

"Tractor the shuttles in," commanded Janeway. "I'll be in Sickbay. Mr. Tuvok, you have the bridge."

---

B'Elanna barely noticed Voyager's tractor beam scooping up the shuttles and depositing them in the shuttlebay. The only thing she clearly remembered was running for the turbolift, and calling "I'll be in Sickbay," back at Chakotay.

---

The Holographic Doctor was more than a bit surprised when Harry was beamed into his Sickbay completely naked. However, he was a doctor, not a gossip columnist, and his business was treating the patients. "Kes, tricorder."

The small Ocampan's hands worked the medical device with well practiced skill. "He's suffering from severe neurological damage, caused by a some type of electroplasma discharge. His neurons are misfiring, which is causing some of his neural pathways to be rewritten."

"Kes, get the neural regenerator. We need to preserve the pathways that are intact now, and then set to work restoring the ones that were rewritten." The Doctor's programming hadn't given him much in the way of bedside manner, but he had the drive of forty doctors that didn't want to lose a patient.

---

Janeway entered Sickbay quietly. She saw the Doctor and Kes working frantically on Harry in the surgical bay and Tom looking on. She went to his side, and led him into the Doctor's office. "What happened out there, Tom?"

Tom stared back at Harry and slowly began speaking. "We had just entered into the dampening field, and we were struck by an asteroid."

The door to sickbay opened. B'Elanna walked in, took one look at Harry and another at the Captain and Tom. Forgetting for a moment that she was on duty, and that she was a Klingon and Klingons don't show emotion, she embraced Tom.

The Captain didn't seem to mind. "B'Elanna, aren't you supposed to be on duty?" Or maybe she did.

"Court-martial me," was the pert response.

"I can't--You're not in Starfleet," Janeway said wryly.

B'Elanna held Tom for the longest time. The Captain took the opportunity to slip away to the replicator for coffee.

"Tom, what happened?" asked B'Elanna.

"Oh Gods, B'Ela, he told me he loves me too." Tom's face crumpled. "Now he's hurt, and it's all my fault!"

This made twice in one day that one of her best friends had told her he loved the other one. The Delta-Quadrant is really weird, B'Elanna thought. "Tom, it's not your fault. It was an accident. Accidents happen."

"But that's just it, B'Ela. It didn't have to happen. If I'd been thinking about flying the shuttle half as much as I was thinking how much I wanted to fuck him, it never would have!" Tom's voice rose sharply, which caused the Doctor to turn, scowl in their general direction, and then return to his work.

Janeway took her coffee from the replicator. I'm going to try very hard to pretend I didn't hear that last statement, she thought.

When she turned to face Tom and B'Elanna, she saw a strawberry-colored head crying onto a half-Klingon shoulder.

---

The three kept a silent vigil for hours. Janeway used nearly her entire week's worth of rations of coffee, until Neelix came in with a tray of food. He made some mention of not being able to heal on an empty stomach, before shuffling back to the mess hall in a rare display of tact. Sometimes I just don't give him enough credit, thought B'Elanna.

About six hours into the operation, the Doctor let out a simulated breath, which his programming told him was the proper way to end a long and complicated operation. He and Kes joined the trio in the office. "And now for you, Mr. Paris," he said, running a tricorder up and down Tom.

"I'm fine, Doc. You need to see to Harry."

"I've done all I can for Ensign Kim. He'll have to do the rest. As for you, you have a hairline fracture of your right tibia, and three cracked ribs, along with assorted lacerations. Kes, osteogenic stimulator." He pushed Tom down on one of the biobeds, and with some effort, began treatment.

"What is Mr. Kim's prognosis, Doctor?" asked Janeway.

Looking extremely annoyed that he was being asked to do something as mundane as healing a broken bone, the Doctor said, "I managed to restore all of the neural pathways that had been rewritten. None of his autonomic functions were affected--I got to those in time--so he doesn't have need for life support. However, his brain has yet to begin use of the reconstructed pathways, so he remains in a coma. As to when he will awaken, it could be as soon as a few hours, and as long as a few years."

"Years! Doc, you've gotta do something." Tom grabbed the Doctor and began to shake him. That was until the Doctor removed his physical self, and Tom's hands passed through the projected light.

"Kes, sedative," he commanded.

I'm not going to let this happen, thought Janeway. "Computer, deactivate E.M.H. program and disable self-initiation subroutine, authorization Janeway-9-7-Delta-Tango." The Doctor winked out of existence. Kes put the hypospray she had grabbed down. "Tom, I don't like doing that, but I want you to get some rest. In your own quarters. Ladies, if you please?" Kes and B'Elanna filed out the door.

Tom went over to the sleeping Harry. "Good night, Harry." He ran his fingers through his lover's hair and kissed his forehead gently. "I love you."

He turned, and Janeway led him out the door, stopping long enough to say, "Computer, enable E.M.H. self-initiation subroutine, authorization Janeway-2-2-Beta-Charlie." The Doctor reappeared.

"Captain, just where to you think you're taking my patient--" he began indignantly.

"Computer, mute E.M.H. program."

---

Janeway and Tom entered the Holodeck as Sandrine was turning up the chairs for the night. She went behind the bar and got two beers without being asked. She grabbed her shawl and headed for the door, stopping only to ask the Captain to please lock up when they were finished.

"Tom, none of this was your fault. I don't blame you, and I know Harry won't," Janeway began.

"How do you know that, Captain? He trusted me, and I let him down."

"I know that because you and I both know what kind of man Harry Kim is. I know that because he's your friend, and beyond that, I know that because he loves you, Tom." Janeway was even commanding when she wasn't on duty.

"With all respect, Captain, I don't know how you can say that."

"I know how I can say that Mr. Paris. I know because he literally walked into the mouth of Hell for you, and I'm not just saying that. It's not my place to tell you this, but I'm going to anyway. Do you know how he kept you safe in the Akritirian prison?"

"He wouldn't really tell me; he only said something about trading his boots to Zio for shelter and bandages and stuff."

"The boots may have been what he traded at first, but that wasn't all he traded. Tom, once his boots for gone, he prostituted himself to Zio in order to keep you safe. Let's just say Zio liked it rough." Her voice was hard, but she was trying hard not to cry. Tom was doing that same, but not having much success. "Tom, I've realized that since the situation in the Delta-Quadrant is starting to seem more permanent, that I need to start loosening up off-duty. So I'm not talking as your commanding officer, or your shrink. I'm telling you. as a friend, that Harry loves you. Now finish off your drink and get to bed. That's an order, Mr. Paris."

---

Tom entered Sickbay promptly at 0800 hours the next morning. Kes was readying the instruments for the day and smiled at him. The Doctor finished examining the still-sleeping Harry and turned towards Tom. He gesticulated wildly. The Captain hadn't thought to return his voice before she went to bed the night before.

B'Elanna entered, and cracked a small smile at the Doctor's attempt at non-verbal communication. He really was getting annoyed. "Torres to Janeway."

"Janeway here."

"Captain, there's a certain hologram who seems to want his voice back."

"I'm a little busy at the moment. I'll get to it as soon as I can. Janeway out."

I bet that sign wasn't part of his original programming, B'Elanna thought. "Kes, how's Harry doing?"

The Ocampan checked Harry's monitor. "He's stable, but there hasn't been any change since last night."

Tom pulled a stool next to Harry's biobed, gently stroked his hair, and began to talk to him softly. The Doctor attempted to silently get him to leave.

"Computer," B'Elanna said, "Deactivate E.M.H. program." She wasn't surprised to see the Doctor reappear in his office, but the ferocity if the "If-it-was't-for-the-Hipocrattic-Oath" looks he was giving her did give her pause. I better let the Captain know he's pissed, she thought.

She walked over to Harry, took one of his hands, and gave him a motherly kiss on the forehead. "I have to go on duty now, Starfleet. Do me a favor and wake up while I'm gone." She replaced his hand at his side, and walked out of Sickbay.

Tom began to talk again. "The Captain told me the truth about what let Zio do to you. Oh, Harry. You didn't need to do that. I'm grateful for my life, and I love you even more for doing it. I swear though, if Zio were here, maintenance would be cleaning him off the walls with sponges right now, with or without the clamp." He cleared his throat. "Why did you do it, Harry? I'm not worth it. What am I? Some two-bit whore who screwed you in the back of the shuttle. The man most directly responsible for you lying here now. I'm a really lousy friend, and probably a worse lover."

"No you're not."

Tom did a double-take. He was right though, the voice did come from the biobed. Harry was awake.

"Thomas Eugene Paris, you are the best friend I've had, in any quadrant. I don't have the basis for judgment about the lover part, and I don't think I want to develop it. You're the man I love, Tom. What happened yesterday was not your fault. It was not anybody's fault. I don't want you to blame yourself."

"But Zio--"

"Forget Zio, Paris. The only thing that matters here and now is us. Zio was the worst thing I've ever had to endure. I survived. You'll survive, too, Tom. You'll survive because I love you, and because I insist that you survive. I don't want to go through that again, but I would do it a thousand times if it meant you'd always be here next to me." A tear trickled out of the corner of Harry's eye.

"I love you, Harry."

"I love you, too. Now how about--" He was interrupted by a crash behind him.

The Doctor had resorted to throwing a tricorder to get the men's attention. Kes, who had started crying harder than either Harry or Tom, had been no help. He tried in vain to make sounds.

"The Captain?" asked Harry.

"The Captain," answered Tom.

"I don't think I've ever envied her more. Kim to Janeway."

"Janeway here. Welcome back to the land of the living, Mr. Kim."

"Thank you, Captain. Would you mind restoring the Doctor's voice? He's looking a little surly."

"Of course, Ensign. Oh, by the way, I'm relieving you a duty for at least five days. I'll be down to see you in a bit. Janeway out."

The Doctor utter a string of expletives. I never knew he could cuss like a sailor, thought Harry.

"Mr. Paris, would you kindly remove yourself from my sickbay? My patient needs to rest."

"No problem, Doc, no problem at all." Tom left Sickbay, looking happier than he had in weeks.

---

Tom was getting ready for bed when his door chimed. "Enter."

To Tom's utter amazement, Harry walked into his quarters. "Evening, gorgeous."

"Harry? But how--" "I'm not allowed to repeat what the Captain threatened the Doctor with. Sufficeth to say, I'm a free man." He grabbed Tom around the waist and kissed him.

Tom kissed him back. They laid down on Tom's bed, and undressed each other. Harry began another slow journey down Tom's body, this time taking detours up and down each arm. He bit on Tom's nipples harder than he intended, and Tom shuddered beneath him. Harry's mouth continues down, this time stopping to kiss the mole just above his bush.

"Cute mole, Paris" Harry kept on his path down, going down the inner thigh of one leg, stopping to suck on each of Tom's toes, before reversing the process on the other leg. His tongue traveled down Tom's penis, and swirled around its head. He drew all of Tom inside of him, and began to suck up and down. Tom began to breathe heavier and heavier, until his back arched and he left out a soft whimper of delight. With that, he came in Harry's mouth. Harry returned his mouth to Tom's lips. He gently rolled Tom over, and Tom spread his legs. I don't have any lubricant, Tom, Harry thought. Gods, will I try to be gentle.

As slowly and gently as he could, Harry entered Tom. Tom let out a small cry of pain, and Harry nearly withdrew, until he felt Tom relax beneath him. He began to go in and out in time with Tom's heartbeat, all the while kissing Tom's neck and shoulders. He went on his gentle way for quite a while, until he moaned softly and came inside Tom. He collapsed in a heap next to Tom, exhausted.

"You okay, love?" asked Tom.

"I think I overdid it," said Harry, a little sheepishly.

"It's okay, Harry. It's been a long day for both of us." With this, he gave Harry a kiss and curled up in his best friend's arms.

"I love you, Tom."

"I love you, Harry."

---

The next morning, B'Elanna sat at the usual table in the mess hall, more than a little upset. Not only was Neelix's coffee far less than it's mediocre best, Tom and Harry were late.

"Are you sure you don't want to start, B'Elanna?" asked Neelix, in the early morning chipperness she found so annoying.

"Positive."

At that moment, Harry and Tom walked into the mess hall, holding hands..

"Well, well, well," said Neelix. "Kes told me about this interesting new wrinkle, but I must say, I didn't believe her until I saw it with my own eyes."

"Neelix, do me a favor," said B'Elanna. "Go cook something and leave us alone."

Tom and Harry sat next to each other. Now this is a switch, B'Elanna thought.

Not noticing the eyes of the entire mess hall upon them, they greeted B'Elanna.

"I don't mind telling you there'll be a whole lot of broken hearts on this ship, now that the two most eligible bachelors are taken," began B'Elanna.

"Who, us?" asked Harry.

"Never," finished Tom.

Neelix shuffled over and placed something that was sort of heart-shaped in front of both Tom and Harry. He left, humming a Talaxian love song.

"How about that." B'Elanna was more than slightly annoyed. "I've been sitting here nearly twenty minutes, and he ignores me. I'll skip breakfast. It'll be good for my figure."

"Uh-huh," said Harry, studying one of Tom's ears intensely.

"Whatever you say, B'Elanna," said Tom, tracing the outline of Harry's face.

"There's an old Klingon proverb my mother taught to me: Two's company, three's an eavesdropping. Bye, boys." With this, she got up and left.

I bet they don't even noticed I'm gone, she thought, as she entered the turbolift. Who am I kidding, they barely noticed I was there to begin with.

---

B'Elanna had a hard shift in Engineering. After deciding the inner part of the asteroid belt was too dangerous to risk another encounter, Captain Janeway had decided to mine the asteroids which didn't lie within the dampening field. This meant B'Elanna had to come up with preliminary plans on how to refine the duranium and tritanium. That in and of itself wouldn't be too hard, but B'Elanna had extremely limited space and equipment to work with. She was looking forward to a long hot shower, and then some time playing pool at Sandrine's.

Once again, the turbolift stopped before it had reached her deck. Megan Delaney and Simone Hardy climbed in.

"Do you believe that slut Tom Paris," Megan was saying.

You're one to talk, B'Elanna thought.

"To begin with, he spends the last two weeks sleeping with every woman on board, and then he proceeds to move on sweet Harry."

Sweet Harry is, quite possibly, the only man on board you haven't moved on, thought B'Elanna.

"And he's not even that good."

Gods, do I want to slap you, thought B'Elanna. She cleared her throat instead.

Without even having to good graces to blush, Megan stammered, "Oh, hi B'Elanna."

Simone, in the meantime, had manually configured the lift to stop at the next deck.

---

His ears still ringing with all the comments he'd gotten from his so- called friends, Harry entered Tom's quarters. Tom was curled up on the bed crying.

"I guess you heard," Harry said softly.

No answer.

"Tom, there isn't an easy way out of this. But I love you, and you love me, and right now, everyone on this ship that I truly care about, B'Elanna, Kes, the Captain, probably even Tuvok, they're all pulling for us to succeed. That's all that matters."

Tom laid his head on Harry's lap.

"There's a song I've always wanted to play for you. You're the expert on the twentieth century, so maybe you've heard it, but the title always makes me think of you, and the chorus is something I really want you to listen to. Computer, play music file Kim-Lambda-4."

The piano music began, and Tom listened. When the chorus began, he started to cry.

"And I think it's gonna be a long, long time
Till touchdown brings me round again to find
I'm not the man they think I am at home
Oh no no no I'm a rocket man
Rocket man burning out his fuse up here alone"

"But you're not alone, Tom. I promise you'll never be alone again."

---

"Captain's Log, Stardate 50105.7:

We've mined as much hull materials as our present fuel-consumption program allows. Barring any major crises, I think we have enough supplies to last for a while. The ship is running fine, and the crew is settling into the next leg of our journey home."

---

In his bed aboard the USS Voyager, Tom Paris sleeps, curled up in Harry Kim's arms. The look on his face is the closest Harry has ever been to heaven.

---

End