by Belynda
---
Date: October 10, 1998
Archiving: Yes to all
Disclaimer: All characters, places and terminology that you recognize
belong to Paramount. Anything else is totally mine.
WARNING! WARNING! WARNING! The story herein is about a male/male
relationship concerning Harry Kim and Tom Paris. If you have a problem
with m/m relationship or you are under 18 please leave now.
Note: This is part 8 in my Love Life series. Thanks to all the people -
and you know who you are - for encouraging me with their messages. I love
feedback. This story has not been beta read. So please don't
ask me if it is or not. Now onto the story!
---
Tom sat on the bed. He didn't really feel like going to sleep but
having to work the next day demanded that he did. However, the dreams came
when he slept. Dreams of Harry, and now dreams of Chakotay. God, I am
so fucked up! He thought as he rubbed his hands across his eyes.
He could still remember the day he found out that Harry was bisexual. Then
kissing Harry. Did that man have the sweetest mouth or what? But
Harry had turned him down when he suggested that they become lovers. Yes,
he could see Harry's side, but he wished it wasn't so. And to add
salt to the open wound, Harry confessed that he had began a relationship
with someone else. The same night that Harry had told him no to becoming
lovers.
He had been so angry that night. Angry about Harry, but also angry that he
hadn't told Harry how he had felt about him earlier. So much wasted
time and now it was too late. Harry was still seeing this other guy,
whoever he was. That was another thing that really bugged him. Harry had
been dating the same man he had turned Tom down for, for at least three
months. He still didn't know who it was. He had gone through all the
possibilities, but he had eventually ruled everyone out. And so he was
back where he had started, not knowing who his competition was.
Then he had broken up with B'Elanna. She had been good for him and he
would always love her but he wasn't in love with her. She had known
it. That had been the reason she told him that it wasn't working, and
he sat there and agreed. She had stopped just short of asking whom the
other person was, and for that he was grateful. They had both known that
for Tom to ever say their name would have done more damage than good. He
hadn't wanted to see the pity in her eyes when he told her it was
Harry. His best friend whom he had alienated and didn't say more than
two words to unless he had to.
She had been really upset and angry when she saw that he and Harry were
no longer friends. She didn't understand what had happened between
them and no matter how hard she tried, she had not learned what the problem
was. It had only taken a day for the word to spread around Voyager that
Tom and Harry were no longer friends. After all, having lunch together
every day for almost four years and then to sit apart the next day, people
were bound to notice. No matter how many people asked he hadn't told
a soul what had happened. He had come close though, talking to Chakotay.
Chakotay. His long time enemy, and only just recently, a tentative friend.
He didn't know when he had started thinking of Chakotay as something
more than an enemy or as just his commanding officer. For a while there he
had been certain that Chakotay was finally letting his guard down and
letting them to become friends. Yet soon after Harry had told him no, he
had seen something in his eyes that made him think that Harry had told him
about Tom's offer. He was almost certain of it, when the day after
that scene in the holodeck where he had told Harry that he didn't want
to see Harry ever again, he had seen the anger in Chakotay's eyes. It
shouldn't have surprised him that Harry had told Chakotay what had
happened. After all, Harry was a person who liked to have a sounding board
to which he could tell anything.
Even after Harry's accident, when everyone had feared that Harry was
going to die, Tom had found that he couldn't say those two little
words. 'I'm sorry'. As time went on he had seen the hardness
that had entered Harry's and Chakotay's eyes whenever they
looked at him. He had stayed away because he hated to see that look in their
eyes. But now that look had changed in Chakotay's eyes. Ever since he
had broken up with B'Elanna.
The day after he and B'Elanna had broken up, he had gone to see
Chakotay. He still wasn't sure why. Maybe because he had never felt so
alone before, but that hadn't stopped him from doing what he had done.
God, he remembered everything he had told him. Then he had done it. He
kissed the First Officer, and Chakotay had responded. Again he had uttered
the same words he had said to Harry all those months ago. 'Think about
it.' That had been four days ago, and Chakotay still hadn't said
anything to him. Oh, he had seen the look in his eyes whenever he had
looked at him. At least Chakotay wasn't avoiding him like Harry had
done. Maybe that was a good sign.
Lying back on the bed, he looked up at the ceiling, not really seeing it.
Tomorrow he would go to Chakotay and ask what was going to happen with
their relationship. He had only seen the First Officer off duty once and
that had been in the corridor with Harry. God, Harry! How he still ached
to kiss those full lips. To taste the sweetness of Harry's mouth. But
no, he had to stop thinking about Harry that way. The young ensign had
made his thoughts clear on the subject of their relationship and Tom could
only hope that with time, they could become friends again.
Checking the time, he saw that he should get to sleep now or he never
would. There would be time to think about Harry and Chakotay tomorrow.
---
Tom closed his eyes in pleasure as he slowly rocked into the warm body of
his lover. They flew open when his lover moaned his name. Seeing Harry
arching his back and thrusting back onto his cock, was almost too much for
him and he closed his eyes again.
However, the temptation was too much and he opened his eyes again. This
time the sight that greeted him was different. Chakotay was with them now,
standing beside the bed, running his hand up and down Harry's sweaty
back. Groaning low in his throat, he thrust harder into the ensign's
willing body. He watched as Chakotay gave Harry one last caress, then
moved closer toward him. A moan escaped his lips when the seductive lips
of the commander settled over his and kissed him with a growing passion.
Finally he had to breathe and he pulled away from his lover, blinking the
sweat out of his eyes. Looking for his lover he saw to his surprise that
Harry, who he was slowly fucking, had risen to his hands and was now being
kissed by Chakotay.
But instead of being jealous he found the sight of his two lovers kissing
highly erotic. He thrust harder into Harry, unable to hold off any longer
at the sight and sound of his two lovers kissing passionately. Feeling the
deep heat and tense build up of pleasure in his cock he knew that he was
going to come any second now. Gasping he slowed his thrusting for one last
time, trying to hold off on his orgasm. Looking down at his two lovers
again, he groaned and with a few hard thrusts of his hips, he was coming
within the willing body of Harry. His mind filled with the sight of
Chakotay kneeling in front of Harry, having his cock being sucked into the
warm mouth of the young Ensign, making his orgasm even more intense.
With a groan Tom woke up, his hand squeezing the last of his cum out of
his erect cock. It had only been a dream, but gods what a dream. He lay
there panting in the sweat soaked sheets, feeling his cum on his chest and
stomach. Only another dream, Tom thought as he found enough
strength to turn his head and look at the time. "Fuck!" Jumping
out of bed, he shakily made his way to the bathroom, knowing that before
he left his quarters, he had better throw the sheets into the refresher.
Again.
---
Chakotay exited the main room of Harry's quarters and walked over to
the bed. Harry was still sleeping and he made an adorable sight. But it
was the noises that Harry was making that had brought him in to
investigate. He had been working on the couch, even though it was his and
Harry's day off, when he had first heard the moaning. Putting it down
to Harry just turning over in bed, he had turned back to his work. But
then the moans continued.
Looking down to at his sleeping lover, he watched as Harry rolled over
onto his back, and the cause of the moaning became apparent. Another
erotic dream, he thought as he shrugged off his silk robe and lay down
next to Harry. Waking a sleeping ensign was a good way to start the day
but waking up a horny ensign was a once in a lifetime event. Getting
comfortable, he reached out a hand and laid it on Harry's chest and in
a flash he was somewhere else.
He blinked. Hard. And again, but the sight didn't change. Harry, on
knees and elbows, being slowly fucked from behind by Tom Paris. Within
seconds he was erect and throbbing, the sight more erotic than anything he
had ever seen before. Reaching out a hand he lovingly stroked Harry's
sweaty back.
Harry turned his head and looked at him, and he knew, beyond anything he
had ever believed before, that he wasn't just in any dream. The way
Harry looked at him, with utter trust and love, told him that wherever he
was, it was just as real as if he were awake. Yet before he could ask what
was happening, Tom moaned. Looking at Tom, as he thrust slow and then
fast and hard into Harry, he wanted nothing more than to kiss him again. And
with one step he did.
Even better than he remembered it, kissing Tom was an experience like no
other. Sweet and hot, Tom had an addictive taste that made a person look
around for the nearest bed. However, just as he was starting to become
heavily involved with Tom's tongue, he heard Harry call out for him.
Not out loud, but in his mind. A picture of what Harry wanted formed in
his mind and he was only to happy to oblige.
Leaving Tom, Chakotay climbed onto the bed and knelt down before Harry.
He quickly positioned himself when his young lover took hold of his weeping
cock and took it into his mouth. Whimpering, he arched his head back in
pleasure, only to look toward Tom when he heard Tom cry out. The sight of
Tom shaking as he came inside the hot body of Harry, left him aching to
hold Tom. But with a start the scene vanished and he blinked, finding
himself on the bed with Harry, panting and still feeling his lover's
hot mouth and tongue teasing his hard cock.
Before his mind could adjust to the fact to whatever had just happened,
and the fact that what didn't, he found himself being kissed
ruthlessly by his now awake and aroused lover. Without thought, he grabbed
Harry and pulled their hips together, rubbing their dripping erections
together. It was too much for either of them and within seconds, they were
coming, crying out with pleasure, their lips still joined.
It was several minutes later, when they were both able to talk without
losing breath, Chakotay asked what was on both of their minds. "What
was that?"
Harry closed his eyes in defeat. "I was dreaming of Tom and the next
thing I knew, I was in his dream."
"His dream? You didn't influence it?"
"You know me better than that Chakotay. Of course I didn't
influence it. It was Tom's dream, his will. I just replaced the
dream Harry. What I don't understand, is what you were doing
there."
Thinking over what he had done, he could offer only one explanation.
"I touched you. You were dreaming and I could tell that you were
horny, so I lay down next to you, intending to wake you up. I placed my
hand on your chest. The next thing I know, I'm in Tom's dream. It
was really weird but I couldn't stop myself."
Knowing that Chakotay didn't like the thought that he had betrayed
Harry, even if it was with just a kiss, he wrapped his arms around the
commander. "You have nothing to be ashamed of. Hell, I was the one
who was being fucked by Tom. All you did was kiss him. As I was already in
Tom's dream, I probably connected you to Tom's dream so when
you touched me. Through me." He pressed a kiss to Chakotay's
brow. "I only have one question. Were you jealous? Of Tom or
me?"
Chakotay was silent for so long that Harry grew concerned that he had
fallen asleep. Finally Chakotay spoke. "I wasn't jealous. Not of
you or Tom. In fact, I'm a little disturbed that I didn't feel
jealous. I should have felt jealous."
"It was only a dream. Only a dream. What you have to remember is that
we love each other and no one is going to change that. Although. . .
"
"Although what?"
"Although we both know that we are attracted to Tom. We know that
there is nothing wrong in being attracted to Tom or even someone else.
It's what we do with that attraction that makes all the difference.
Several days ago we decided what we were going to do with Tom and his
desire for the both of us. We can change that plan if you want. I
won't stop you."
Chakotay thought over their plan and decided that he still wanted to go
through with it. "We'll stick to the plan. We just have to wait
until the opportunity comes up. In the mean time, what are we going to do
about Tom's dreams?"
Harry ducked his head away from Chakotay's gaze. "I haven't
told you this before but I have been walking into Tom's dreams for a
while now, and I can't stop it. Maybe deep down I don't want to.
Nevertheless, he has been dreaming of us with him for several day's
now. I can tell that he is starting to resent sleeping. It just reminds
him of what he has lost."
"Janeway to Chakotay."
Both of them jumped at the sound of the Captain's voice, as unexpected
as it was. Especially as they were both naked with semen all over their
bodies. Chakotay sat up in bed and pulled the covers over the two of them
before responding. "Chakotay here Captain."
"Chakotay, Tuvok has just informed me that we will be in range of an
uninhabited M-class planet in under an hour. I still take it that you
would like for me to assign you and Tom on away mission together, although
it is your day off?"
Chakotay shared a questioning look with Harry before answering. "Yes
Captain. I really think that it would be best if Tom got away from Voyager
for a while. The situation with Ensign Kim isn't getting any better.
It's time for me to intervene."
"Okay then. Report to shuttle bay one in one hour. If you are going
to go on an away mission, you can at least have some form of comfort. Oh,
and Chakotay. Good luck with Tom. Janeway out."
"It's started." Harry stated.
Nodding, Chakotay leaned in for a kiss. "It's started. No turning
back now."
---
Tom made it onto the bridge four minutes late for his shift. Seeing the
look the Captain gave him, he flushed and looked away hoping that she
wouldn't call him up on it.
"Mr. Paris, my ready room if you please."
Shit, she was going to call him up for it. He had only been late
twice in a row, and he knew he had been pushing his luck, but she
wouldn't bring him up on it. Wouldn't she? Meekly he followed her
into her ready room, avoiding Tuvok's all seeing eyes.
"Mr. Paris, I'll come straight to the point. You have been late
for your shift two days in a row. Added to the fact that Tuvok tells me
that your work efficiency has dropped by five percent. Can you tell me
what's going on?"
Watching the Captain as she sat behind her desk, Tom tried to think of a
good excuse. Unfortunately he couldn't think of one. "I don't
really know why Captain. I'll make more of an effort from now
on."
She nodded. "I accept that you will try but also think that you need
a break. That is why you are going to be one of the crew to go on an away
mission for supplies on a M-class planet."
"Away mission? I didn't know that we had come across a M-class
planet."
"If you had been on the bridge earlier, then you would already
know." Displeasure was evident in her voice. "Now, you will be
going with the Commander. He will give you the details on what you will be
gathering. You will leave in one hour and will be planet side for four
days. Hopefully when you return, your performance on duty will return to
100%. You can leave now to get ready. Report to Shuttle Bay One in one
hour. Dismissed."
Tom opened his mouth to give an argument about why he shouldn't go,
but then he saw the look in her eyes. There was no way he was going get
out of this away mission. Turning he left her ready room and walked off
the bridge. Once the doors of the turbo lift had closed behind him, he
sagged against the wall. "Fuck, four days with Chakotay."
God, I hope that he is going to say yes or this is going to be the longest
four days of my life, Tom thought.
---
An hour later he entered the shuttle bay. He quickly spotted Chakotay
carrying supplies onto a shuttle.
"Lieutenant. Good. I'm ready to go. If you would like to do the
pre-flight check, then we can get under away."
"No problem Commander." God can you smile any
brighter? Performing the pre-flight check at least gave him something to
do. He was not going to think about how he would be spending the next four
days with Chakotay. Four days! He shook his head at the thought,
thinking he would go insane if he had to put up with Chakotay for four days
and knowing that he couldn't be with him.
"Is something wrong Mr. Paris?"
Startled, Tom turned around in his seat. "Huh?"
"You were shaking your head. Is there something wrong?"
"No. I just have a sore neck. Probably just slept funny."
"Not bad dreams I hope."
Tom almost broke his neck in his attempt to look at the commander.
Chakotay couldn't know. Could he? "Why do you say
that?"
"No reason. Just a comment. Now, are we ready to go?"
"Ah, yeah. I'm all set." Turning back to his console, Tom
quickly prepared them to leave the shuttle bay.
Seven hours later, Tom and Chakotay had finished scouting the surrounding
area around the shuttle craft. It had also given them an opportunity to
collect a few supplies, and now they were back at the shuttle craft.
Taking a long drink of water, Tom looked over at Chakotay who was also
having a drink. "So Commander . . . Have you gave any thought to what
I said the other day?" Great going Tom, put your foot in it.
Chakotay looked up in surprise. "Yes I have. I've thought about
it a lot Tom and to be honest, I still don't know if I've reached
the right decision. However, life is about taking risks. So I am going to
take one." Chakotay put down the water cannister and the tricorder he
had been holding and walked over to where Tom was sitting. Dropping down
to his knees, he reached out a hand and cupped Tom's cheek. Time
to set the plan into motion, he thought as he leaned forward and pressed
his lips against Tom's. When he went to pull back, Tom finally moved.
Feeling Tom wrap his arms around his shoulders, Chakotay pulled him
closer, thinking how Tom was such an excellent kisser. With the
dream still fresh in his mind, he groaned into Tom's hungry mouth.
Pulling back, the younger man drank in the sight of Chakotay with his
swollen lips and passion glazed eyes. "Are you sure about this?
You're not going to regret this are you? I don't want to pressure
you into anything Chakotay. I will understand if you say no."
Please say yes. I couldn't handle it if you told me no.
The commander's eyes grew tender as he looked upon Tom's face.
With a shy smile he whispered his consent. "Yes I'm sure that I
want this. I want you! Now stop talking and let's go and get
the bed rolls out. It might be a touch more comfortable than the hard
ground."
Seeing the honesty in Chakotay's eyes, he nodded. Together they got
their bed rolls and spread them side by side on the ground. Then they
stood by their make shift bed, looking into each other's eyes.
Chakotay took his hand and pulled him to lay down on the bed. Running a
fingertip across the tattoo that was such a part of Chakotay, he
couldn't help the shiver of anticipation that shook his body.
Chakotay smiled and leaned down to kiss Tom again. Soon all thoughts of
not being here in Chakotay's arms left and he gave himself up
to the commander's will. Groaning into his soon to be lover's
mouth, he sunk his fingers into the into the black hair on Chakotay's
head, arching up into his mouth. Wanting more, needing more, Tom ran his
hands down the commander's back to cup and squeeze his taut
buttocks.
Gasping into Tom's mouth, Chakotay rubbed his erection into
Tom's. Both men stilled, then suddenly they were in a frenzy, tearing
each other's clothes off, with only the thought of being one with the
other. Soon both were naked.
Tom kissed his way down to the commander's nipples. Licking, sucking
and biting both of them until they were red and swollen. Kissing his way
down until he reached Chakotay's throbbing cock, he paused briefly to
take in the beauty of the tool that was going to give him pleasure. Thick
and heavily veined, it was truly a sight to make him drool. Licking his
lips, he took the purple head into his mouth and sucked.
Soon Chakotay couldn't take it anymore, and he pulled Tom up and
kissed him. Hard and long. Finally he pulled back. "Can I make love
to you Tom?"
Gulping down the need to turn over there and then, Tom nodded. He watched
in surprise as his lover pulled out a tube of lubricant from the bed roll.
Chakotay parted his legs and moved between them to get better access to
Tom's body. With a lubricated finger, he slowly pushed it into
Tom's warm body. First one, then two. Finally three fingers were
slowly moving in and out of the Lieutenant. He took in the sight of Tom
moaning and softly thrusting back down onto his fingers. The vision was
almost to much and he leaned down and kissed Tom, his tongue soon finding
and entwining with Tom's.
Arching his head back, Tom took in a deep. "As much as I am loving
this, I would rather have something other than your fingers in me
Chakotay."
Chuckling, the First Officer took a pert nipple into his mouth and
tenderly bit it. "Your wish is my command Tom." Arranging Tom
so that he lay on his side, Chakotay quickly spooned up behind him. Coating
his hard cock with lubricant, he braced a hand on Tom's hip. "You
ready?"
"God, yes! Please Chakotay, I want you."
Nodding, Chakotay could well understand Tom's need. Slowly he pushed
into Tom until he came to a stop. He let them both grow familiar with him
being inside of Tom and waited until the younger man made the first move.
Finally the pilot moved his hips forward, making Chakotay's hard cock
slid within the hot tight glove of Tom's body.
Both moaned at the sensation. The First Officer moved closer to Tom, and
started to kiss the side of Tom's neck, while his hand stroked the
taunt stomach under his hand for a brief moment before reaching down and
taking hold of Tom's erection. Both moaned, and increased their
movements. Arching into the other. Thrusting towards completion.
Chakotay was now pounding into Tom, sweat running down both of their
bodies, making them slide ever more erotically against the other. Unable
to stop himself, Chakotay cried out Tom's name, coming within the
shaking body of his new lover. A second later Tom was coming as well, his
cum squirting out onto the commander's hand.
It was several minutes before they could get there breath back. Tom
couldn't help the moan that escaped his lips when Chakotay pulled out
of him. "God, Chakotay. That was better than I had dreamed it would
be like. Why did we wait?"
Turned away from Chakotay as Tom was, he didn't see the pain that
flashed deep in his eyes. "I don't know Tom." Pulling one of
the bed rolls covers over them, Chakotay looked up at the bright blue sky.
"I don't know." Then he joined Tom in slumber.
---
High above them, Voyager orbited the planet. It was at the end of the main
shift so there were a lot of people out and about the corridors, and in
the mess hall of Voyager. It was a time in the day, when people got a
chance to see one another and to share a few laughs. But hidden away in
his darkened quarters, young Harry Kim, sat on a chair by his window,
looking down at the planet.
As deep as his connection to Chakotay went, they were too far apart for
Harry to pick up anything. And even though he had agreed and had even
thought up several aspects of the plan to let Tom become lovers with them,
it still hurt to know, that even now as he sat there, his lover, his
beloved, was in the arms of another. It didn't matter that in four
day's Chakotay and Tom would be back on Voyager and their second
part of the plan would go into action.
What mattered was the fact that Tom now had the ability to take Chakotay
away from him. And no matter how he loved Tom as a friend, and despite the
fact that he had pushed Chakotay into this, he knew that if Tom took
Chakotay away from him, he might do something he would later regret.
"Chakotay, come back to me, my love. Don't forget me."
Harry whispered to the silent planet, hoping that his love would come back to
him as the same man as he had left. With a lone tear spilling across and
rolling down his cheek, Harry continued to watch the planet.
---
End
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