by Astarte
---

Disclaimer: Paramount/Viacom owns Star Trek: Voyager. I am only taking the characters out for a little fun and will return them unharmed. No infringement is intended and I'm not making any money.

Note: I had a really hard time thinking of a title until Mykkhal pointed out that I use food a lot through the story and I thought of the lovely book/movie "Like Water for Chocolate." Also, the pasta recipe is what I use for my own hangovers and it does make me feel better.

I would like to dedicate this story to Mykkhal.

I would also like to thank all of my beta readers, Mykkhal, Janie, Jane, Tirinar, Bridget and Sue for doing an excellent job in helping me with my story. They really helped me smooth out the rough spots!

Thanks a million to all of you!!!

Do not archive, distribute or link directly to this story without the express permission of the author.

---

"Paris to Kim. . ."

"Yeah, Tom?"

"You coming to dinner tonight?" Harry could hear the worry in Tom's voice. He hadn't been out of his quarters in five days, except for duty. Harry had spent the last several months trying to help Seven of Nine to understand human emotions. Suddenly, she fell ill and died several days later. The Doctor had spent all of his time trying to make her well, replacing each of her organs as they failed, only to have the new organs fail even more quickly. His medical opinion was that Seven had caused herself such stress over trying to understand emotions and be more human that her body lost its ability to function.

"I don't really feel like it, Tom."

"I know, Har, but you can't stay in your quarters for the rest of your life. You need to get out and be with people again."

"I know, Tom, it's just hard. I really felt like I was getting somewhere with her, you know?"

"I know. . . Hey, would it be okay for me to come and see you, instead?"

Harry sighed "I suppose so. I'm not the best company right now."

"I know, but I'd like to feel like I was doing something, Har! You're my best friend, you're hurting and I can't stand not being able to help."

Harry's heart warmed just a little. "I understand, Tom. I went through the same thing after you and B'Ela broke up. Come on over."

"I'll be there in 30 minutes. Dinner's on me."

"Alright. Kim out."

---

Upon arriving at Harry's quarters, Tom was startled to see just how badly off Harry really was. He was gaunt and pale. He looked like he hadn't eaten or slept in a week. Tom thought about that and figured it was probably true.

Tom sat Harry down and went to the replicator. "Here you go, Har. Tomato soup, the ultimate comfort food, grilled cheese sandwiches with tomato, I know how you like them that way, and a big salad."

Harry grinned "You're so good to me, Tom."

"HA! As much as I owe you, this doesn't even come close to it!"

"Tom! You don't owe me anything."

Tom got a wistful look in his eyes, "This man is my friend," he said.

Harry fought the sudden lump in his throat. "No one touches him."

"I choose my own friends," Tom said, harkening back to an even earlier experience.

"Oh, Tom."

"It's okay, Harry. You've been the best friend I've ever had, by far. I will never, never forget that."

The pair ate in silence for several minutes.

"Thanks a lot, Tom. You're a good friend."

"I try, Harry. You're not such a bad friend, yourself." Tom looked around and noticed the absence of Harry's music stand. "Haven't felt much like practicing, eh?"

"No, not really. I. . . I could play something if you'd like. You know, play for my supper, so to speak. . ."

"Well, when you put it that way. . . Sure Har, I'd love to hear you play."

Harry began with a long, melancholy piece that Tom had never heard before. It seemed to match his mood. Then he played several pieces that he knew Tom enjoyed.

Tom took his leave of Harry when he saw Harry begin to yawn. "Time for me to hit the sack, Harry."

"Yeah, it is late."

"Get some sleep, alright?"

"Yeah."

---

For the next few weeks Tom spent as much time with Harry as possible. After the first week Harry had begun eating in the mess hall and playing pool at Sandrine's. He was eating more and sleeping more. He didn't look quite so gaunt or haunted. He obviously wasn't the old Harry yet, but he was getting there. Tom believed that Harry was making progress.

---

The mood on Voyager was celebratory. Tom had flown the ship through yet another amazing set of maneuvers, allowing them to escape a fight with some weird hostile race with very little damage.

There had been a celebration in Tom's honor at Sandrine's. B'Elanna had even provided some real, Maquis whiskey to thank Tom for keeping her ship intact.

As the evening progressed, Tom saw Harry grow more and more drunk, which was somewhat unusual for Harry. Tom also noticed that Harry's mood seemed to worsen with every drink. He became loud and obnoxious, also very unusual for Harry. Finally Tom heard Harry say something to an innocent Ensign from Engineering about being a murderer. Tom decided that it would be best for Harry to turn in early, which meant to Tom and he should go too.

Tom walked Harry to his quarters and went in with him, at Harry's invitation. They sat for a few minutes talking about the latest ship's gossip. There had been several new couples and a few splits in evidence that evening.

"I blame myself, you know. . ."

"Har?" Tom had wondered if Harry had been getting depressed thinking about Seven.

"She would have lived longer if I hadn't pushed."

"What are you talking about?"

"Tom, I pushed her and pushed her to try and feel normal human emotions, to try to understand us, to get away from being a Borg. If I had left her be. . . If I had allowed her to learn at her own pace, this wouldn't have happened!"

"Oh Harry! You can't blame yourself! You were doing what you thought was right! What you thought was best for her!"

"Not really, Tom. I was doing what was best for me. I wanted her to feel, so that she could feel something for me. I was trying to cure my own loneliness."

"Oh Harry." Tom moved from the chair he'd been sitting in and took Harry into his arms.

"I didn't really love her, Tom. I don't think I could have. I was just using her to fill the void."

"Shhh, Harry. Don't talk that way. You couldn't treat anyone that way. Ever. You'll see when you get more distance. You can't blame yourself, whatever your motives might have been. You had no idea that she could die that way. None. Nobody could have known that!"

Harry began to sob.

"Shh, Harry. Shhh. It's going to be okay. I promise. You'll find somebody. You will! You just have to keep looking and not give in!" Tom gently led Harry to his bed and helped him off with his boots. He sat down, took Harry in his arms and held him while he cried himself to sleep. When he was certain Harry was asleep, he loosened his friend's clothing before covering him with the blankets.

Unable to resist, Tom reached out and stroked Harry's cheek. "Someday, Harry love, you'll be happy. I'll see to it." Somewhere, deep in Harry's subconscious mind, he heard what Tom said and slipped into a deep, untroubled sleep.

---

"Paris to Kim"

"Mrrumph"

"Harry?"

"Yeah? What?"

"Heh. It's a good thing we're not on duty this morning, my friend. You don't sound like you're in such great shape." Tom heard Harry moan in response. "Hang on, Harry. I'll be over in a few minutes and I'll fix you a sure-fire hangover cure."

"Murmmel"

"I'll be there in ten minutes. Paris out."

---

"Sandrine used to fix this for me, Harry. It really works. It seems a little gross, but eat it and you'll feel better in short order."

"Pasta?"

"Yeah, it'll help buffer your stomach so that you don't get sick."

"Okay, but what's this yellow stuff?"

"That, Harry, is yeast."

"YEAST?!"

"Yes, Harry. It's a blend of several, very specific strains of food yeast. It's not like bread yeast or anything."

"I still think it's weird."

"I know, Harry, but the yeast will help replace the B vitamins that the alcohol took out of you last night, which will help you feel better. The butter and parmesan just help it taste good. Oh! I just realized I left out one tasty ingredient." Tom rushed to the replicator and came back with what Harry thought were Chow Mein noodles.

"Chow Mein noodles?"

"No, Sev."

"Sev?"

"Yeah, it's made from chickpea flour, oil and spices. It's really good. It's. . . um. . . Indian food, I think. Dig in, Har!" Harry did as Tom said and was surprised at how good the dish was. It did help settle his stomach, just as Tom had said.

"Wow, Tom. I'm surprised. This is good."

"Told you so, Harry." Tom grinned.

When Harry was done with his meal he stood up and began to stretch his back.

"Back sore?"

"Yeah. I slept in a weird position last night."

"Go lay down on your bed, with your shirt off. I'll get you fixed right up."

"Huh?"

"A back rub, Harry. You remember those, right?"

"Yeah, uh. . . alright."

Harry took off his robe, put on a pair of sweats and settled onto his bed. A moment later Tom came in carrying a small bottle. "Massage oil," Tom explained when he saw Harry's curious glance. Tom sat next to Harry, poured a small amount of oil on his hands and spread it onto Harry's back. Once he had the oil distributed, he went to work.

Tom could feel quite a bit of tension in the area between Harry's shoulder blades, so he concentrated on working it out. Once he felt that the muscles in that area were relaxed enough, he went to work on the shoulders and neck and then the lower back.

"I think you're set, Harry, " Tom said, not stopping.

"Mmmmmmmm," moaned Harry in appreciation.

After several minutes, Harry realized that the "tone" of Tom's touch had changed. Rather than a soothing, comforting touch, it was now loving, and arousing. Harry turned onto his side and looked up into Tom's eyes and saw the burning desire there, and the love. He had just enough time to wonder why he had failed to see that look in Tom's eyes sooner, when Tom's mask slid firmly back into place.

"Well Harry, I recommend a shower," Tom said, quickly standing up. "A water shower. By the time you're done with that you should feel human again." Tom went into the bathroom to wash his hands. "Dinner later in the mess, Harry?"

"Sure, Tom."

"I'll com you when I'm ready."

"Alright."

Harry discovered that Tom's suggestion of a real, water shower was indeed a good idea. As he stood there, letting the hot spray pound his skin he couldn't help but wondering what was going on with Tom. He was certain he'd seen love and outright naked desire in Tom's eyes. He would need some time to think about this development.

---

The next few weeks were routine and boring. The Voyager crew traveled through a portion of space where the few life forms present had not yet achieved space travel. The crew took time to give the ship some babying, gather food and minerals from the local planets, and take some much-needed time for rest and relaxation. Tom, Harry and B'Elana had enjoyed working on some new holo programs both for recreation and training.

Tom and Harry ended up on the final rotation for shore leave and food gathering on a lovely forest planet devoid of animal life, save for a few harmless insects. Some very delicious fruits and vegetables had been found and the crew was eager to incorporate them into their diets. The boys beamed down with two days to themselves, followed by a day of food gathering before they had to return to Voyager.

Tom and Harry had decided to take half a day to hike around the area and found a lovely place to camp. The ground was amazingly flat and soft, a stream ran slowly by, creating a very nice swimming hole, there were plenty of fruit trees, and to the east a cave provided extra shelter in case of bad weather.

Tom had the tent set up in five minutes flat. Once the sleeping bags were in and the rest of camp was unpacked, Tom got up and ran towards the swimming hole, shedding clothes as he went. "Last one in cooks dinner!"

"Hey! No fair!" Harry tore off after Tom but Tom had too much of a lead. Harry waded into the water and found it to be very pleasantly warm. Tom tried not to look back at Harry as he waded into the water, but he couldn't help it. When he did look, he regretted it immediately. The intense hunger that a naked Harry inspired in him was nearly overwhelming. He swam away into a deeper portion of the stream where the current cooled the water a little more and got himself under control. Once he felt he could control himself, he swam back to Harry and splashed him. Harry responded by grabbing Tom by the ankle and pulling him under. The two men splashed and played for several hours until they began to feel hungry.

Harry got out and gathered up armloads of two fruits that looked like bananas and apples. He then unpacked several packets from his pack and went to work making dinner. The result was a delicious fruit 'stew'. Tom was surprised at how good it was when Harry told him how it was made.

"Your base is a thick, chicken flavored gravy. You can add chunks of meat, if you want, but I prefer it without. Then you add apples, bananas and nuts and serve it with a savory rice dish. My mother used to make this dish all the time and when I saw the fruits that were coming back with the away teams, I just knew I had to make it."

"Wow, Harry. This is really good. I'm impressed. What other hidden talents should I know about?" Harry didn't answer, he just grinned.


Following dinner the men went for a short hike to check out the surrounding area. They ran into Chakotay and Tuvok setting up camp in a similar valley. They were shocked to come upon their superior officers making out like a couple of high school kids.

"Uh, oh. Tuvok, I think the cat's been let out of the bag."

"An interesting expression, T'hy'la, are you troubled by this development?"

"No, not at all. I had just wanted to get used to us for a little while before the rest of the crew found out."

"Commander," said Harry, "You can trust us to keep this private until you're ready for the rest of the crew to know. Really."

"Thank you Ensign, that would be most accommodating of you," replied Tuvok.

"No problem, Tuvok. Uh. . . Tom, we should head on back to camp now, don't you think?"

"Sure Harry. Let's go. Oh, and Commanders. . . have an excellent time!"

---

The two young men spent most of the hike back to their encampment in silence.

"Have you ever been in love with another man, Tom?"

Tom visibly paled, but Harry wasn't looking. "Yes," he almost whispered.

"I was once, but nothing came of it. He already had somebody."

"Wh. . . when was that?"

"It was while I was in the Academy. He was my best friend's roommate. He was. . . he was everything I wanted in a 'mate' at the time. He was strong, smart, attractive, fun. . ."

"Wow, Harry. I never knew you were. . . um. . . interested in men."

"There haven't been all that many that I would consider, and I've never actually had a relationship with a man, so there wasn't much to know."

"Yeah."


The men returned to camp just as the sun began to set. Harry built a fire while Tom took a quick dip in the swimming hole to clean up. Tom warmed by the fire and unpacked some snacks he had brought while Harry cleaned up.

"Cheese and crackers, Tom?"

"With wine and fruit, young man."

The two ate and chatted well into the night. There wasn't enough wine to get more than a pleasant buzz, or not as far as Harry knew. Tom had saved a bottle for the next night.

"Well, Har, I think I'll turn in."

"I'll be there in a minute." Harry sat, staring up at the stars, wondering about recent developments. He hoped that things were going the way they seemed to be.

---

The next morning Tom fixed breakfast after both men had a brisk, morning swim. "Tom! Coffee? Real coffee? Eggs, bacon, toast and hashbrowns? Where did you get all this stuff?"

"What do you think I do with all those extra rations? I save them for special occasions."

"Tom! You're spoiling me! This is exactly my favorite breakfast!"

"Well, I do know a thing or two about you, Har."

After breakfast the boys went for a long hike, avoiding the Commanders' camp. They found a small grove of trees that resembled maple and oozed a thick syrup. Tom scanned it and found it to be edible. "Mmmmm, Harry, we're having pancakes for breakfast tomorrow! This stuff is great!"

They continued hiking and found the planet to be abundant in beautiful flowers, tasty fruits, and wonderful views.

---

After a long day of enjoying nature the boys were ready for a swim and supper. Harry again cooked dinner, this time a lovely stir fry with noodles. Tom provided the late evening snack and wine again. As they sat chatting Tom noticed that Harry was stretching his back in an odd way.

"Is your back alright, Harry?"

"Yeah, I just strained something when I slipped on that rocky patch."

"Hey, why don't I get one of the bedrolls and you can lay down by the fire while I rub it for you?"

"Tom," Harry sighed, "you don't have to do that. I'll be fine."

"I know, Har, but I want to."

"Okay."

A few short minutes later Harry was laying face down and shirtless enjoying Tom's expert touch. "Where did you learn how to do this?"

"I dated a massage therapist once. She taught me."

"Remind me to thank her in person if we ever get back." Tom was surprised at the way Harry said 'if we ever get back'. It sounded as though Harry wasn't so upset at the prospect of spending the rest of his life in the journey anymore. Tom was very pleased.

After a while, Tom's hands stilled, as he became lost in thought.

"Tom?"

"Hmmm, oh! You must be getting chilly. Here, put your shirt on. I'll get the dishes cleaned up."

"Tom?"

"Yeah, Har?"

"We already did the dishes."

"Oh."

"Tom, why is it that you look like you've seen a ghost or something?"

"Me? I'm fine, Harry. Really." Tom didn't sound fine.

"Tom, I'm your best friend. You can tell me the truth."

"Uhhh. . . Har, it's just that. . . well, I was thinking about what you asked me yesterday about men."

"Oh, you mean when I asked you if you'd ever been in love with a man?"

"Yeah."

"So. . .?"

"So, I am, Harry."

"No, I am Harry, " Harry joked. "No, seriously Tom, are you telling me that you're in love with a man right now?"

"Yeah."

Harry thought for a minute and remembered Tom's reaction to the question. "Oh no, Tom. I'm so sorry! I had no idea!"

"It's okay, Harry. It's not like you did it on purpose."

"Did what? Tom, aren't you talking about Chakotay? Aren't you in love with him?"

"Chakotay! No! Where did you get that idea?"

"Well, the way you reacted yesterday, I thought it must be him. Tuvok?"

"No! Harry!" Tom started laughing and had to sit down.

"I don't understand Tom," Harry nearly whined in frustration. "Who, then?"

"Oh. . . H. . . Harry. It's you!"

"Me?" Harry squeaked and he too had to sit down. "Me?"

"Yeah, Har. I hope I didn't upset you. I just couldn't keep it in anymore."

"Anymore? How long have you been keeping it in?"

"Since the day we met, Har, since the day we met."

"I don't know what to say, Tom."

"It's okay, Har. I understand if you don't feel the same."

"No, Tom, it's just that I'm surprised. Why didn't you tell me sooner?"

"I had no idea how you felt about that sort of thing, Harry. Men, I mean. I just didn't know how you'd take it. You never gave me any reason to believe you might be interested."

"Oh. I guess you're right."

Silence reigned for several minutes.

"Tom?"

"Har?"

"I'm interested."

Tom's stomach jumped into his throat. He just looked at Harry, unable to speak.

"Tom?"

"Uh, yeah?"

"Did you hear me?"

"Mmmm, yeah. I guess I was just stunned. Are you sure?"

"Tom I've been thinking about this for months, ever since you helped me out after Seven. . . died."

"Harry, I would have helped you, no matter what. You're my best friend and that's what friends do."

Harry could see that Tom was still having trouble processing so he scooted over next to Tom and put his arms around him. "Are you alright?"

Tom leaned into Harry's embrace, "oh, Harry. I've never been better."

Tom could not hold back any longer. He leaned in and brushed his lips against Harry's. Harry's mouth opened to him and Tom felt himself falling all over again. They kissed for what seemed like hours, gently at first, then with growing urgency. Soon they were tugging at each other's clothes, kissing deeply. Somehow they made onto the bed roll, by the fire.

Harry was a little afraid and told Tom so.

"You have nothing to worry about, Harry. I would never hurt you."

"You've done this before?"

"A few times," Tom said, grinning.

Harry relaxed and let Tom show him the way. Tom began very slowly. First he explored Harry's neck and found some deliciously sensitive spots. Working his way down Harry's chest, Tom found, to his delight, that Harry's nipples were hard with anticipation and arousal. Finally, Tom couldn't resist any longer. He had wanted to taste Harry for so long. He took Harry into his mouth, with no warning. The suddenness overwhelmed Harry who could not contain his equally sudden orgasm.

"Tom! Oh my god, TOM!"

Once Harry was coherent again, Tom began to prepare him, very gently. Harry tensed a little at the first intrusion of a slick finger into his body. "Shhh, it's okay. I won't hurt you Har."

Harry forced himself to relax. He wanted this. Suddenly a bolt of pure pleasure shot through his body. "TOM! AH!"

"That was your prostate, Harry."

Harry moaned in appreciation. Before he knew what happened, Tom had worked three fingers into him and was driving him mad with pleasure. "Tom, please. I need you. Please!"

"It's alright, Har. I'm here. I just want to be certain that you're ready."

"I'm READY!"

"Okay, Har," Tom chuckled, withdrawing his fingers. Harry groaned at he sudden emptiness, only to feel Tom shift up and place himself at Harry's entrance. Harry took a deep breath and willed his body to relax while Tom entered him very slowly. Once he was fully inside Harry, Tom stilled. Harry couldn't believe the incredible sense of fullness. After a minute or two, Tom began to move. Harry was lost in the amazing sensation of having Tom moving inside him and began to meet him, thrust for thrust.

After what seemed like an eternity, and a blink of an eye, Harry felt Tom take hold of his cock and begin stroking. Awash in pleasure, it took only a few strokes before Harry was coming again. The power of his orgasm ripped through him and nearly caused him to pass out. Just as he was coming down, he felt Tom begin to come inside him and came again.

"Oh Tom."

"Harry."

"Love you," said Harry, drifting off to sleep.

"Love you too, Harry."

Tom felt a sense of peace wash over him. There was no going back, but he wasn't afraid. He was not afraid that Harry would react badly in the morning. He knew deep in his heart with unshakable certainty that Harry would love him back. Harry was finally his. Tom fell asleep holding his Harry. HIS Harry.

---

End