Title: Male Supermodel Bonding

Author/pseudonym: Scribe

Fandom: Zoolander

Pairing: Hansel/Derek

Rating: NC-17

Status: Finished

Archive: Yes, to any archive that receives this (RS, WWOMB, allslash, etc.)

Feedback: Pretty please.

E-mail address for feedback: poet_77665@yahoo.com

Other websites: http://www.angelfire.com/grrl/scribescribbles and
http://www.angelfire.com/grrl/foxluver for Poetic Series (Mulder/Krycek) slash.

Disclaimers: I do not own these characters or concepts. This is written strictly for entertainment,
and no profit has been made.

Summary: Hansel has talked Derek into some extreme camping, and Derek experiences more male bonding than he expected

Warnings: m/m sex


Male Supermodel Bonding
by Scribe

"So, Derek, whatcha got planned for after the Spring Splash?"

Derek opened the pot of lip gloss and considered it, then screwed it closed. Maybe one with just a TOUCH of pink. He'd been a little pale lately. He considered booking some time in a tanning salon. "Nothing, really, Hansel. Catch some zees, catch some rays, maybe start checking out credentials on plastic surgeons."

"Dude! You're not considering getting yourself CUT, are you? Man, you're in your PRIME. You have at least six, seven months before you need to start considering having a tuck."

"I know, but it never hurts to be prepared. Why do you ask?"

"Well, now that you and me are friends and everything, I thought maybe we could, like, hang."

Derek's heart sped up a little. Hansel wanted to spend time with him? He asked casually, "Sounds
pretty cool. So are you and your entourage going to just sit around your warehouse, or what?"

Hansel shook his head. Derek tried not to be mesmerized by the glints on his golden tresses. "Nah,
they're all heading out to Acopulco for some cliff diving. I'm kinda burned out on that right now."

Derek was carefully smoothing the lip gloss on, using his little finger for maximum control. He held his mouth open and gently removed the excess from the corners of his mouth. Hansel shifted in his chair, grateful that his last outfit was cut full in the crotch. Seeing Derek with his mouth open did something to him. "No, I was thinking about heading up to Colorado to do some camping up around Aspen."

"I did a great fun-fur shoot up in Aspen a couple of years ago." Derek remembered the lodge the shoot crew had stayed at, complete with big four-poster beds, a roaring fireplace, hot buttered rum, toasting marshmallows, snow bunnies, and a Swedish ski instructor named Ingmar. Derek blushed. Hansel adjusted himself. "That sounds cool."

"Outstanding! So, Derek, we'll fly out day after tomorrow and spent a week in the Rockies, right?"

"Sure. How much will my share cost?"

Hansel waved. "Don't worry about that, dude. My treat. All you have to bring is your camping clothes and a sleeping bag."

Derek remembered room rates the last time he'd been in Aspen. Maybe it was cheaper in the off season? "Thanks. I'll go to the Bedding section at Bergdorf's and buy one as soon as we're done here."

"Um, don't think you'll have much luck there." Hansel scribbled a store name and an address on a scrap of paper with an eyebrow pencil. "Try here."

Derek read the address. "CAMPING?"

Hansel nodded. "It's a store that specializes in out-fitting male models. They'll take care of you."

*****

Hansel had rented a Range Rover, and it was waiting for them at the Denver airport. He eyed Derek's pack. "Pretty cool, Derek. You should be able to find it at night easily enough."

"The clerk said that neon colors were the fashion this season. I thought the flame orange would go good with my dark hair."

"At least you won't have to worry about being shot by deer hunters."

They drove up into the mountains. They passed numerous exits that led to various resorts, and Derek began to wonder where Hansel had made the reservations. Finally he said, "Hansel, I was
wondering."

"Yeah?"

"Why do we need sleeping bags?"

Hansel glanced at him. "Earth to Derek: Uh, to sleep in?"

"But don't they provide bed linens?"

Hansel shook his head. "Wouldn't be much point, since they don't provide beds."

Derek frowned. "What kind of a ski lodge doesn't provide beds?"

"I think all ski lodges provide beds."

"Then why won't we have them?"

"Because we're not going to a ski lodge. Dude, it isn't ski season. We're going to a boss, untamed
natural spot."

"Natural?" Derek sounded horrified. "You don't mean, like... outside?"

"Well, duh, Derek. I said camping, didn't I?"

"But... but... HANSEL! OUTSIDE?"

"I brought a tent."

Derek rode in stunned silence. He mouthed the word 'Out-SIDE?'. "Um, Hansel? What do we do if we need to, like, uh... you know."

"No calling agents, man. If you have a cell phone, I'm pitching it."

"I just brought my pager." Derek showed it to him. Hansel snatched it and pitched it out the window. "HEY!"

"No outside contact. Just you and me and the wonders of nature."

"Speaking of wonders, I wasn't talking about the phone. I meant, what do we do if we need to. like, you know... visit the little boys room?"

"I say don't hold it, man. Bad for your bladder."

"Earth to Hansel: Hello? Is there going to be restroom up there?"

"Sure. Thousands of them."

Derek blinked. "Well, the campgrounds are better equipped than I would have thought."

"Thousands--growing all over the place."

"HANSEL! You don't mean doing our business OUTSIDE?"

"Derek, what do ya think people did before they invented indoor plumbing?"

"Held it?"

"Well, that would explain the expressions on some of those old dudes in the paintings, wouldn't it?"

They drove for a while longer. Derek noticed with growing unease that there were fewer and fewer signs of civilization. When the power lines disappeared, he got nervous. Without power lines, you couldn't operate a blow-dryer. What was Hansel THINKING of?

The road sort of petered out. It went from paved, to gravel, to dirt, then it just WENT. Derek hunched in his seat, gazing out wide-eyed as trees went past. "Hansel, where are we going?"

"There's a nice little spring just up here, dude."

"I thought you said they didn't HAVE beds up here?"

"Not that kinda spring, dude. Water. It comes up out of the ground."

Derek wrinkled his nose. Hansel thought how cute he looked when he did that. Derek said, "Ew!"

"You drink Evian, don't you?"

"Well, yeah, but that comes out of a bottle."

"Where do you think it is BEFORE it gets in the bottle?"

He thought. "The tap?"

"No, but where do you think the water in the tap comes from?"

"Bottles?"

Hansel sighed. "Derek, all water that isn't rain, comes out of the ground at some point."

"EW! Well, that does it, I'm not drinking anything but Diet Coke from now on."

"Derek, they use water to make Diet Coke."

"~EW!~"

"Never mind. We can go swimming in the spring."

"Swimming in Evian?"

Hansel parked. "We're here."

Derek looked around. He blinked. Trees, grass, flowers, rocks, bushes, sky. Not a single street,
telephone pole, video store, or billboard. Not even a frozen yogurt stand or Starbucks. He blinked.
"Hansel, I'm not gonna get eaten by a bear or anything, am I?"

Hansel, smiled at him, reached over and ruffled his hair. "You won't get eaten by a bear, but I can't guarantee about an 'or anything'."

Derek sat there for a minute, mouth open, while Hansel jumped out and started to unload the jeep. Finally he got out, first checking the ground carefully to be sure that there weren't any rabid chipmunks or rampaging badgers around. He stood by the end of the jeep, watching as Hansel carried bundles over to a nice little cleared area. "Um... should I do something?"

Hansel looked at him. "Sure, I have a really, really important job for you." Hansel opened the glove compartment and pulled out a road map. He opened it and pointed to a spot. "See this?" Derek nodded. "We're here." He handed the map to Derek. "Re-fold that for me and put it away, would you?"

Derek sat back in the jeep and started to do his assigned chore. *crinkle* *fold* No, that wasn't it. *rustle* *crease* Drat. *unfold* *crackle* *rip* "Oops." *smooth* "Hansel, is there, like, a trick to this?"

"Probably."

"Darn. I can do this." *CRUNCHRUSTLEFOLDCREASECRINKLE* "There."

Hansel was tossing a handful of tent stakes on the ground next to a pile of canvas. Derek showed him the lumpy, torn wad of paper. "Whoa, Derek, that's better than I ever do." Derek blushed. "Tell ya what, dude." He pointed. "See that path? Go down that, and you'll come to the spring. Check it out, and I'll set the camp up."

Derek eyed the path with some trepidition. What if it, like the road, petered out? What if he got lost? What if they had to call in tracking dogs and park rangers, and news crews would show up, probably CNN and maybe E!, and they'd have helicopters looking for him, and by the time they found him, he might have SUNBURN. International television exposure, and him with no concealer. He'd left it out of his portable make-up kit.

Hansel was watching him. *Oh, wow. I can't let Hansel think I'm a wuss.* Derek squared his
shoulders, squared his jaw (thinking that he should remember this look--it would come in handy if he ever did any outdoor-wear modeling), and started down the path.

Hansel watched that pert butt disappearing down the trail. He started setting up the camp. *This has gotta work. Out here, without any distractions, I may have a chance. I have to do something, let him know how I feel, before I do something stupid, like bitch-slap Mathilda just before grabbing Derek's ass and sticking my tongue down his throat.*

He had the camp pretty well set up by the time Derek came back. He was announced by the squelching sounds. Hansel looked at him. "Whoa, dude. You look like the winner in a wet T-shirt contest. And wet pants contest. And wet everything ELSE contest." (Actually, those wet clothes DID cling to him in the most interesting manner). "But you could've skinny dipped. There's no one around but us. Why didn't you take off your clothes before you went swimming?"

"I guess it's sorta because I didn't GO swimming. Intentionally. See, there was this really cool log
kind of sticking out into the water, and I thought, 'Wow. Wouldn't that make a great place to pose for, like, some really serious, thoughtful pictures?' Like for my resume? So I thought I'd just go out on it and try a couple?" Derek wiped dark hair out of his eyes. "Hansel, it MOVED! Don't they have, like, safety inspections for this place? That water was so cold that my balls tried to crawl back to their place of origin. Oh, and were you planning on fishing?"

"I thought I might. We could have a contest to see who catches the first fish."

Derek tossed a rainbow trout at him. "I win. That swam into my mouth. I bet my eyes are all red, and I didn't even bring any Visine."

"You need to get out of those wet clothes before your skin gets all pruned up."

"Okay." Derek looked around. "There isn't a changing room around here, is there?"

"Sorry."

Derek peered at the tent. "I couldn't stand up in that, and I can't change clothes laying down."

"You can go back in the bushes."

Derek winced, and said, voice dripping with dread, "Hansel, there are BUGS in there! I was dive-bombed by a dragonfly."

"Those are harmless, Derek."

"Dude, they're named after DRAGONS, hello? Those boogers could breathe fire at any minute, and I'm not gonna risk having anything important out in the open around them."

"Well, you can change right here." Derek blinked again. "I'm the only one here, Derek. Come on,
you've been nearly naked in front of millions of people, even THOUSANDS."

Derek knew he was blushing. How could he tell Hansel that those were just strangers? Being nearly naked in front of HANSEL... that was different. Hansel was so perfect... Well, except for that bump on his nose, and even THAT was kinda sexy. With his broad shoulders and muscled chest and flat tummy and blonde hair and tight ass and...

Derek turned around and started back down the path. Hey!" Hansel called, puzzled. "What are you doing?"

"I'm going to go fall in that spring again. THEN I'll change clothes."

A few minutes later, a chattery-teethed, soaked Derek Zoolander came back to camp. "I'm not sure I can do this, Hansel," he complained.

"Sure you can. Look, pretend that you're modeling a complete outfit, from the outer layer, through sox and underwear. You present it by peeling off a layer at a time. Then you just take off the last layer."

"Oh! I can do that." He rummaged in his pack till he came up with a pair of radio-earphones and put them on. He twiddled the tuning knob, an intent look on his face, till he found a suitable song. Hansel squatted on his haunches and watched as Derek's head started to bop slightly from side to side. He could hear, faintly and tinnily, 'I'm Too Sexy For My Shirt' by Right Said Fred.

The shirt went. Hansel wiped his forehead. Derek was so perfectly smooth and pale all over. He was slender, but toned. He shimmied his shoulders to the music. He had pink nipples. Hansel bit the side of his hand.

The hiking shorts went. Now Derek was wearing soaking wet Maurice Manstuff bikini briefs, pale blue that brought out the color of his eyes, and outlined a nice, big handful of cock. He turned, swinging his hips. Oooo... They barely covered a round, perky butt, too. Hansel, as casually as possible, clasped his hands in front of his straining crotch.

As only a true supermodel could, Derek removed his hiking boots and athletic socks without missing a beat or losing his balance. Then he stopped. Hansel waved. "Go on."

Derek was blushing again, the pink stain moving down his throat. Turn your back."

"Oh, come on, Derek."

"I mean it, turn your back."

"How about if YOU turn YOUR back?"

Derek had a 'My God, I never thought of that!' expression on his face. "Oh. Yeah." He turned away and peeled his jockeys down.

"Derek, you have the most perfect ass in creation. You should always be shot with high resolution, lit from the left side so that the left cheek throws a thin rim of shadow on the right, and makes it look more 3-D."

"Thanks, Hansel." Derek was touched that his new friend would notice. "See, my problem is that, from the waist down, my left side is my best. From the waist up, it's the right." As he spoke, he was getting ready to pull on another pair of underwear.

"Wait! You can't put your clothes back on while you're still damp. Dry off."

"But all I brought was a face towel."

"Derek!"

Derek, forgetting about being nude, turned back to Hansel, planted his hands on his hips, and said
huffily, "Well, the lodges USUALLY provide towels. I didn't think I'd need them."

Hansel stared, then said softly, "Okay, then dry off with the face towel."

It was smaller than a placemat. Derek had done numerous soap and shampoo commercials, so he knew the proper way of toweling down to show off the body to it's greatest advantage. Of course, before he'd always had those teeny, just out of camera range, decency thongs on, and he'd been grateful for them, with all the crew milling around. But now there was just Hansel, and he was a male supermodel, too, and he understood about the sheer joy of being really, really, really, really good looking, and using your body as a tool of expression for your inner self. Or something cool like that.

When he felt he was sufficiently dry and started to get into his dry underwear, Hansel got up and started for the trail. "Hey, where are you going?"

"To fall in the spring."

When Hansel came back and started to change out of his wet clothes, Derek felt like he should go fall in the spring again, but he figured that at this rate they'd spend the entire week doing that, so instead he just went and pretended to refold the roadmap again.

*****

Derek carefully tossed a twig on the fire and watched, round eyed, as it blazed up. "Fire is, like, really primitive, you know?"

"Yeah. I'm a fire spirit. My last guru told me that. I'm fire, because I'm intense and mercurial."

"Really? It's not because you're hot?"

Hansel shrugged. "That, too. I'm not sure how much I'd believe him, though. He also said that Madonna was obviously a water, because of her gentle and placid spirit."

Derek cocked his head. "I wonder what I am?"

"Well, I'd say that you're an air."

Derek looked hurt. "Are you calling me an airhead?"

"No, man, no! I mean you're like the wind. You can be wild and strong, like a storm, or gentle and
mellow, like a spring breeze."

Derek looked at his feet. "That's so beautiful."

"I know. It was the script for the Tempest Cologne commercial I did last month, but it really made me think of you. You want a puff?"

"I don't know, Hansel. I don't usually use that stuff. It's bad for you, you know."

"Oh, come on. We're out here all alone. No one will know. It's not like you're going to get arrested, or anything. You've tried it before, haven't you?"

"Well, yeah, sure. When I was younger, and didn't respect my body."

"Come on, one puff. You'll like it. It'll make you feel good."

"Well... just one."

"Cool." Hansel grabbed a marshmallow out of the Stay-Puft bag and speared it on the sharpened, peeled stick, then offered it to Derek.

Derek shook his head. "You do it. I always catch them on fire."

Hansel grinned as he held the marshmallow over the now low fire. "I thought you didn't do these?"

"Not often." Derek watched as Hansel turned the stick, and the marshmallow puffed up, turning a
delicious pale gold.

When it was done, Hansel pulled it back and examined it. "Okay, come and get it." When Derek reached for it, Hansel playfully pulled it back. "No ya don't. Toasted marshmallows are NOT finger food. Come over here."

Derek scooted over to sit close to Hansel, and the blonde man tipped the stick toward him. But when Derek tried to lean forward and bite the marshmallow, it wavered out of his reach. He tried again, and it moved again. He looked at Hansel suspiciously. Hansel smiled at him angelically. "Sorry, dude. Can't seem to hold my hand steady."

Derek grabbed Hansel's hand, holding it stead, leaned over, and nipped the golden crust off the marshmallow, leaving it's innards, a half melted blob, on the stick. Hansel watched as he munched. "Is it good?" Derek nodded. "Sweet?" Derek nodded again, more slowly.

*Oh, wow, I'm TOUCHING his HAND. He could be a hand model, it's so perfect.* Derek thought. "Huh?"

"I said you still have half of it left."

"Oh." Derek leaned forward again. He couldn't take his eyes off Hansel's face. He closed his lips over the gooey blob, pursing them, and s-l-o-w-l-y pulled back, removing most of it. Then he licked the last of it off the stick, swirling his tongue around it. Then he let go of Hansel's hand and said quietly, "Thanks, Hansel."

Hansel pointed. "You have some of it, right there. Just below the right corner of your mouth." Derek lifted his hand to wipe it away, but Hansel caught his wrist. "No, don't do that! You'll just smear it, man. Something that sugary, you have to have something wet to clean it off."

"Do you have any Wet Naps."

"We're roughing it, Derek. We'll have to use the natural clean-up method. Hold still."

Hansel leaned over and licked the small white spot away. Derek was frozen. "Mm. It IS sweet." Hansel kissed him softly, his tongue swiping over Derek's mouth. He whispered against his closed lips, "But that was even sweeter."

"Um, Hansel?"

"Yeah?" He hadn't pulled back. His lips moved against Derek's. Derek started to get hard.

"Um, Hansel? I think you just kissed me. That is, unless I got an endorphin rush from the sugar, and I'm hallucinating."

"No, I think it's chocolate that gives you the endorphins, and we didn't make S'mores because I
forgot the graham crackers. But if you WANT an endorphin rush, I know two easy ways you can get one. You either run a long way, really, really fast, or you have sex. Did I tell you that there were probably bears out there, beyond the campfire light?"

Derek squeaked. Before he knew what he was doing, he'd climbed into Hansel's lap, throwing his arms around his neck. Hansel patted him comfortingly. "I was just kidding, Derek."

Derek slapped his shoulder lightly. "That wasn't nice, Hansel."

Hansel pushed him down on his lap. "Is THIS nice?"

Derek gasped. "Hansel! I'm gonna break your flashlight if you don't get it out from under me."
Hansel had his right arm around Derek's waist. With his left hand, he showed Derek the flashlight. Derek looked at the flashlight, brow furrowed in concentration, then looked at Hansel, then looked at the flashlight. "But if that isn't the flashlight, then what..." His eyebrows rose slowly. Another part of his anatomy rose more quickly.

"I think we ought to go to bed now, Derek."

Derek looked into Hansel's eyes. They were a beautiful blue, and they were very, very close.
"That's an awful small tent, Hansel."

"Uh huh."

"It doesn't look much bigger than a bathtub. Is there going to be room for both of us?"

"Well, I got both sleeping bags in there, but I had to zip them together to sorta make one BIG bag."

"Oh."

"Actually, it will be better. If it gets chilly, we can use body heat to keep warm."

"Um... okay."

"But you have to take your clothes off."

"Huh?"

"Well, I guess you can keep your drawers on, but I sleep nude, and your regular clothing would just scratch too bad. Certain parts of my skin are kinda sensitive."

"Just certain parts?"

"Yeah." Hansel stood up, setting Derek on his feet, and opened his shirt. "See? I don't wear khaki too often, and the rubbing has my nipples hard."

Derek stared. "I wouldn't want to irritate you."

"Cool."

They stripped, Derek keeping his underwear on and desperately trying not to look at Hansel too closely, because it would be very hard to hide a raging hard-on when you were wearing nothing but jockeys and occupying a sleeping bag with someone.

They lay side by side in the sleeping bag. There was a couple of feet of space overhead, but almost none at the sides, and ABSOLUTELY none between them. Derek could feel Hansel pressed all along the side of his body. He stared up at the canvas roof and tried counting clothing designers leaping over a catwalk. It didn't help.

Hansel could feel Derek all along his side. *Man, he has smooth skin. And his nipples looked just like little pink gumdrops, the kind that taste like fruit punch with a little perfume mixed in.*

*Boy, he smells good,* Derek thought. *I wonder how often he washes his hair? I wonder what type of shampoo and conditioner he uses? I wonder if he ever uses them to jerk off in the shower? I wonder if I ought to turn over before he notices this boner?"

Trying to be discreet, Derek turned over on his stomach. Luckily Hansel was on his left side, because he was STILL having trouble with turning left. Unluckily, it turned out that ground did not have nearly as much give as a good mattress. Derek said, "Ow," softly.

Hansel said quickly, "Hey, Derek, are you stiff?"

"HUH?"

"Your back? I know you aren't used to sleeping on the ground."

"Oh, that. Uh, yeah. Kinda."

"I can help." *zip* "My sleeping bag has these cool zippered pockets on the inside for storage. I have some sandlewood massage oil. I'll just give you a little rub-down."

"That sounds nice." Derek sighed as the big, strong, oily hands began to work his shoulders, then his back, kneading the muscles strongly and smoothly. Derek purred. He felt like he was going loose and boneless... everywhere but his crotch.

"Derek, do you do anything to keep your gluteus maximus firm?"

"I didn't see Gladiator. I auditioned for the role of a body slave, but Joaquime Phoenix didn't want another brunette sharing too much screen time with him."

"No, man. Your gluteus." Hansel pinched Derek's butt gently. "You know, your ass. Do you do any exercises?"

"Should I?" Derek felt a tickle of unease. A drooping butt could lose you a LOT of work.

"Not really, but a good, regular massage would do wonders for keeping it from sagging any time soon. Want me to do it for you?"

"Yeah, go ahead."

"You'll have to take off the shorts."

"Huh?"

"Dude, I have oil all over my hands. It's ruin your Calvins." Derek started to argue, but Hansel had hooked his fingers in his waistband and had already dragged the underwear down over the curve of his butt. It seemed a little late to protest, so he lifted his hips and drew his legs up so Hansel could slip the drawers off the rest of the way.

Then those big hands closed on his ass and started squeezing and rubbing. Derek closed his eyes. Boy, that felt good. He felt his cock digging at the soft flannel under him, and thought that if the tent pole snapped, he'd be able to replace it easily.

Now with each squeeze, Hansel pulled outward slightly, spreading his cheeks. "I think I need more oil. You sure don't want to get chafed there, dude." Hansel's voice sounded a little hoarse.

Derek wiggled as he felt a trickle of oil ooze down the crease of his ass. "Hansel, that seems like a lot of oil."

"Yeah? I'd better rub it in, then." Derek started to sweat when Hansel started stroking up and down his ass crack. "Derek, I just want to tell you that I think you're a really cool guy?"

"Yeah? Thanks, Hansel. I think you're really cool, too."

Hansel's hand moved slowly. "I mean, I don't just think you're cool, I think you're really COOL, you know?"

"Me, too."

"And I think you're beautiful, too."

That made perfect sense to Derek. Male supermodels, by definition, went beyond handsome. Beautiful was totally appropriate. "No, you're beautiful."

"You are."

"YOU are."

"But even your asshole is beautiful, man."

Derek was silent. "It is?"

"Yeah. It's like a little pink star. Derek?"

Derek wondered if it was possible to die from horniness. "What?"

"You know what my agent told me when I started modeling?"

"What?"

"Reach for the stars." Derek moaned as one long, slippery finger slid deep inside him.

Derek gasped. "And all MY agent told me was be on time and don't argue with the photographer. I think I like your advice better."

"Derek," Hansel moved his hand gently. Derek whimpered and squirmed. "Whoa, you're tight. Have you ever, like, done it?"

"Of course I've done it. You were there when me and Mathilda, and the Sherpa, and the Maori..."

"No. I mean, have you ever done it with a guy? JUST with a guy."

Pause. "No." Pause. "Not yet." Hansel kept pumping his finger in and out. Derek realized that he was spreading his legs. "Actually, I think I may be in the process of doing that right now."

"I sure hope you are." Hansel worked a second finger into Derek's anal passage. Derek crooned and started to hump back to meet him. "Yeah, I think you are. You want me to keep going?"

"I'd really rather not have to try to hurt you, Hansel, 'cause I think you'd probably kick my ass, and I'd rather have you fuck it."

"Excellent." Hansel reached over. "Those pockets are good for holding other stuff, too. I'm gonna have to take my fingers out for a minute, Derek."

"Hansel..."

"Just for a second, dude. Gotta put the baggie on." Derek mumbled in discontent as Hansel pulled out. "Macho Wraps gave me a year's supply of condoms when I did their last campaign. I figure if we hang together much, I'll run through them in a few months." Hansel rolled the condom down over his erection, then crawled on top of Derek, settling down in the space between his legs.

Derek said softly. "This feels weird." He felt Hansel parting his buttocks again. "Very weird."
There was a broad, warm nudge against his asshole. "Very, VERY weird." Hansel pushed forward gently, but firmly, and Derek breathed, "But G-O-0-0-O-D!"

Derek was so tight and hot that Hansel thought, *Oh, crap. This is gonna be one of those 'spoils you for anybody else' experiences.* But after that one flashing thought that he was probably never again going to be satisfied with anyone else, he kept pushing. When he was buried in Derek's ass up to his balls he whispered, "You okay, man? I'm not hurting you, am I?"

Derek groaned and wiggled. "HURT me!"

"Oh, wow!" Hansel started fucking. So did Derek. It was quite an experience for both of them. Neither had ever had the ceiling fall in on them before. Of course, it WAS just canvas, and it didn't slow either of them down a bit.

A bear approached the camp. He stared at the heaving mass of canvas and listened to the moans, squeals, and growls coming from it. He decided that there were a couple of mountain lions having a dispute under the cover, and he wasn't ABOUT to risk his butt breaking in on that. He stole what was left in the marshmallow bag and hurried away.

There was a final, frantic spate of thrashing, and two voices yelled, almost simultaneously, "FINAL SHOT!" "THAT'S A WRAP!"

The two men, still layered together, lay still and panting. Derek said, "Hansel, I'm lying in a puddle."

"You're welcome." Hansel rolled off of Derek, than dragged him up so that the slightly smaller man was lying on top of him. "How's that?"

"Still kinda wet, but a lot more agreeable." Derek rested his head on Hansel's shoulder and sighed.

Hansel stroked Derek's back. "I love you, man."

Derek peeked up at him. "Yeah?"

"Yeah." Hansel squeezed him. "I want to hang with you a long, long time."

"How long?"

So Derek needed to be reassured? Hansel smiled. "I want to hang with you till you're modeling as a father. As a father of a school-aged kid, not a baby. I want to hang with you till you can do ads for denture cream and Ensure."

"What about Depends?"

"That's gross, man. But yeah, even that."

"I want to hang with you till we can do Medicare Supplemental insurance commercials. I want to hang with you till we can do AARP commercials. Until we can do a Grecian Formula for Men commercial without being in danger of a fraud in advertising suit."

"Wow. So, we're talking, like, permanent?"

"Yeah. I'd like a commitment ceremony."

"Excellent. How about a double ring ceremony?"

"Yeah. That would be so romantic."

So they did. And, as Hansel had assured Derek, the nipple ring opened up a whole new spectrum of modeling opportunities.

END