Blair Helps Jim Relax

by Carol Rose Cappe

Blair helped a trembling Jim into the loft. Jim was pale, lines of pain were etched on his face, his clothes muddy, and he leaned heavily on the smaller man. "Let's get you out of your clothes." Blair tugged at Jim's ruined shirt. Jim nodded, and stepped back from Blair's help. He quickly removed his dirty garments, and kicked off his shoes.

"I'm taking a shower." He stalked into the bathroom, again shaking off Blair's offer of help.

Blair went into the kitchen, put on the kettle for tea, and started heating up some prepared soup. A difficult case had almost ended in tragedy, but the psycho was in jail, and no one was injured. Blair was very worried about Jim, though. He was too tense and suffered from insomnia and too many headaches. He wasn't eating properly, and had lost at least ten pounds in the last two months. None of the relaxation techniques Blair tried helped at all. The weather was too inclement to go camping, and for some reason Jim refused to spend a weekend at the monastery. He also refused to see a psychiatrist, and Blair didn't insist; afraid of possible problems if a doctor prescribed medication. An idea came to Blair; if Jim was willing it might just work. Blair heard the water turn off, and Jim stomp upstairs. Anxiously Blair joined him.

"You can't continue like this, you know."

"I know. I'm sorry if you've been in the line of fire." Jim was lying rigidly on the bed, wearing only his boxers and a T-shirt. If anything the lines on his face were even deeper than before, and blue-black circles under his eyes spoke of his lack of sleep.

"I have an idea. It's really far out, but nothing else we've tried has made a difference. Ever hear of infantilism?"

"Pedophilia? What's that got to do with anything?"

"No, this would be done by consenting adults. Sometimes it's sexual, or is done as part of a bondage scene. It can be taken as far as the person wishes, but the basics would be diapers and bottles."

"Why would I want to participate in such a strange thing? I'm not into sex games, you know that."

"Just hear me out, Jim. In your case it would just be for relaxation purposes. If you agree, we'll do it for twenty-four hours. If you want we can continue it for the whole weekend. During that time you'll wear a diaper, I'll feed you and keep you clean. You'll have no decisions to make - absolutely no worries, no responsibilities."

"I can't keep going like this." Jim raised him arm, and watched how his fingers still trembled slightly. "Okay. It sounds too weird, but I'll give it a shot."

"Great. I know of a store that's nearby, it should have all the supplies I'll need. I'll be back in about half an hour, you can have some of that soup while you wait for me."

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When Blair returned he noticed the half-eaten bowl of soup sitting on the counter. He sighed. "This better work," he said to himself. He went upstairs with his packages, not surprised to find Jim once again lying stiffly on the bed.

"What do I have to do?" Jim asked, as he watched Blair unwrap his purchases.

"You're too heavy, so I'll need your co-operation if I'm changing your diaper or need you to change positions. If you're too uncomfortable with anything, just let me know. You can stop this anytime you want."

"I'm not sure I can use a diaper."

"That's okay." With Jim's help Blair removed his boxer shorts, and diapered him. "Do you want a bottle? I can fill it with juice, water, or milk."

"A bottle?" Blair showed him the larger than normal sized nipples that could be used with a baby bottle. "No." Jim noticed the pacifier that Blair had bought. "I used one of those until I was almost five. It upset my father, but my mother just told him I wouldn't still be using it when I went to college." Blair grinned as he popped the pacifier into Jim's mouth, and watched him awkwardly suck it.

"You try to get some sleep. I'm going to clean up, and maybe watch some television. I'll join you later."

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Blair made sure the loft was secure and made his way upstairs. He sat down on the bed and looked at Jim. Jim was sprawled out on his back, in a deep sleep, with the pacifier still in his mouth. He looked comfortable, happy, years younger with the lines of pain and tension gone from his face. Blair lay down, quickly falling asleep, the rhythmic sucking noises Jim was making oddly comforting.

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Blair woke up, feeling Jim's gaze on him. Jim was still on his back, but the pacifier was discarded and a slight smile was on Jim's face. "Do you want to continue? It's up to you." Jim nodded. "Your headache is gone?" Again Jim nodded. "Great, then let's get the day going. Do you need a diaper change?"

Jim made a 'T' with his hands. "I'm sorry." he said softly.

"Why? What's wrong?" Blair had gathered the diaper changing supplies, and slipped the change pad under Jim's raised hips. "Thanks." Blair opened the diaper. "Oh." The diaper was not only wet, but also soiled. "It's okay, Jim. I think it's great that you're relaxed enough, and trust me enough, to do it in the diaper. I really didn't expect that." Blair cleaned Jim, then put a fresh diaper on him.

"I imagine you're pretty hungry, you didn't really eat anything last night. I'll re-heat the soup for you. Be right back." When Blair returned with the warmed up soup, he was bemused to see Jim contentedly sucking his right thumb, while he worried the blanket with two of the fingers on his left hand. "My." Blair murmured. "You're full of surprises." He helped Jim sit up, and put several pillows behind his back. Carefully he fed Jim the soup, then gave him a bottle of milk. When the bottle was finished Blair brushed Jim's teeth and hair, then removed Jim's shirt. Then he had him lie back down. He sponged bathed Jim, marvelling at how relaxed his muscles were. When Blair was finished he put a clean shirt on Jim, and covered him with the blanket. "Do you want your pacifier?" Jim nodded, and he fell asleep, happily sucking away.

The rest of the day passed quietly. Blair thoroughly cleaned the loft, and did some big batch cooking to freeze for future meals. He had to wake Jim up for lunch and dinner. Jim slept so soundly he did not even stir when Blair changed his diaper during one of his naps.

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Blair was surprised that Jim actually slept until eight Sunday morning. He bent over and kissed his forehead. "Good morning sleepy head. I didn't realize just how sleep deprived you were. Do you want to continue?" Jim nodded. The routine from the previous day was repeated, the only difference being Jim stayed awake most of the day. Blair turned on the radio to an easy listening station. He caught up on his reading, and Jim listened to the music while sucking his thumb.

At ten in the evening Blair shut off the radio. "It's over, Jim. Tomorrow it's back to the regular grind. Do you want to talk about what we did this weekend?"

Jim sat up. "Thanks. I feel better than I have in years. At first I thought this whole thing was just too weird, but I'm glad I trusted you and gave it a chance."

"Would you want to do it again?"

"Maybe. I'm not sure. Let me think about it." Jim leaned over and set the alarm for the next morning. "Hold me, please."

Blair and Jim fell asleep in each other's arms. Blair did not mention that Jim slept in a diaper. The next day Simon commented on how rested Jim appeared.

END