TITLE: Missing Thoughts

AUTHOR: Roberta Hawkes

GniteJboy@aol.com

PAIRING: Fawkes/Hobbes

DISCLAIMER: This is a fan-written story and does not intend to infringe upon copyrights held by Stu Segall Productions, USA Cable Entertainment and SciFi Channel.

COMMENTS: This is a missing scene (missing thoughts, actually) from the episode "Another Invisible Man" What's going on in Hobbes' head when he goes into Darien's apartment while he's asleep.

ARCHIVE: Sure.



Missing Thoughts
by Roberta Hawkes


I thought I'd begun to trust Fawkes without question, but then he asked for a gun. When someone who has, up until this morning, not wanted to carry a weapon is suddenly begging for one it would set off the alarms in anyone. And when that "anyone" is a paranoid battle scared agent like myself the alarms are deafening.

Got to talk to Fawkes about getting better locks put on his front door. Someone who use to make their living at breaking and entering should know better. It was easier to break into his place than my sister's diary.

Hum... nice place. This is the first time I've been in his apartment. Funny, I thought he'd be a slob. He can't seem to comb his hair, but he can keep house. I like neat and orderly.

And there he is sleeping like a baby. A baby holding onto a hammer, that is. With his luck, he'll throw his arm over his head during the night and bash his own brains out. I'll watch him as long as I can and make sure he doesn't hurt himself, because as much as I've warned myself off of it I care about the kid.

Actually, I more than care about him. I admitted that to myself last month after I almost died from that fall off the fire escape. He doesn't know I know what he did while I was laying there in that bed, but the nurses told me. They thought we were a couple and would make comments about how Fawkes stood guard over me after and such. They just didn't understand partners do things like that. Couldn't get them to believe we weren't lovers. Then for some reason I didn't try too hard to convince them. Bet Fawkes would've had a cow if he'd heard them talk.

Yeah, Fawkes would probably throw a fit and find some way to get himself a new partner if he knew old Bobby Hobbes was in love with him. Really showed him love this morning when I busted through his door, throwing him to the floor and sticking my 9mil in his face. But I felt... what's the right word... betrayed when I thought he'd beat the Fatman almost to death. And yeah, I'll admit it, I was scared. Scared that if he had done it, what happened with us? What would become of me?

I know it's freaking stupid of me to feel this way. Maybe I'm just transferring my obsession for my ex to him. It'd be easy to do that. He's one good looking guy and the first person in my life I've felt any real in.

Aw, hell, told myself I wouldn't do this, but my brain doesn't have much control where it concerns Fawkes. Can't stop myself from moving close enough to smell him... Irish Spring. He must have showered just before he turned in. Now close enough to touch him... soft. I could spend the whole night just touching his hair.

He doesn't make any reaction. I've got to teach him how to be alert to his surroundings even while asleep. But then, maybe not. Agency's already forced him to learn things he should never have had to learn.

He looks all of eighteen laying here. Aw, crap. I can't do this. I'm sorry Darien, I was going to stay the night. Stop someone from hurting you, or learn for sure if you're the one we need protection from. But I can't stand here watching you in that bed and not want to climb in with you. I can't trust myself to stop at just touching your hair. God, Fawkes, it's been so long since I let myself feel this for someone.

What would you do if you woke up to find your nutcase partner standing over you with a raging hard-on? Probably use that hammer on me. Call it self-defense. The Fatman'd believe you. Probably give you a pay bonus for getting rid of this paranoid pill-head.

Gotta get out of here. One last touch, though. Sleep well, partner.



END