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Valentine's Day and Corny Candies

Summary:

Oliver eats Joke Candy and is rendered unable to say anything other than Corny Lines

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Disclaimer: I don't own any of them (but I would love to get them as presents *g*)
AN: This is part of the Oliver Wood Valentines Challenge '04 ( http://groups.yahoo.com/group/The_Keeper_Pairings/ ). My challenge was:
"Pairing- Oliver and one (or both) of the Weasley Twins
Must contain joke candy (because, you know, they are Gred and Forge), and alot of corny lines Must contain the line: "You... you... you swing that way?"
Trace (The Femme Maurader)"

A/N 2: Thanks to Angel of Death for helping me find all those Corny Lines.

AN3: English is not my first language and this little piece is not beta read yet ... so sorry for anything I might have missed while going over it myself



Valentine's Day and Corny Candies


Oliver sat on the couch of his sitting room, contemplating a huge pile of cards, presents, candies and countless other things. It was once again Valentine's Day and there was nothing that he hated more than this holiday. That is why he hoped that it would be over soon.

Ever since he had started his Quidditch Career he got more and more Valentine Cards, some with presents and some without. And the presents were as different as presents can be. They ranged from cheap ones like pralines and candies to expensive ones like clothes the senders obviously thought would fit him. Not to forget the increase in marriage proposals. He always had the feeling that all the people who tried it once a year decided to send one at Valentine's Day as well. There was no other word than hate to describe what he felt about all this.

However this wasn't the only reason he hated this particular day of the year so much. It also reminded him of the fact that he had nobody to share his life with. The life he had between his training, the games and the endless Interviews and public outings at charitable events simply left no time for him to search for someone that he could love. Aside from the fact that his fame made it very difficult to find that special someone, for the majority was interested in his money and the fame. His mood decreased further when he saw another bunch of owls arrive with even more letters, cards and packages. Would it never end?

Annoyed with himself and the world itself he took a candy out of the box in front of him and popped it in his mouth. It tasted a bit off, but he ignored it. It wasn't his day, why should he care about the taste of candy?

As if his day couldn't get any more worse he heard the unmistakable sound of someone arriving by floo-powder in the adjourning room, directly followed by a voice he knew all too well.

"Oliver, Darling, are you at home?"�

He looked around and realised that the only way out was through the room with the fireplace and cursed to himself. What was it about this day? Now he did not only have to deal with his post, but with his mother as well! He would have loved to jump out of the window, but since he lived on the ground floor it was rather useless. He still would have to face his mother and the rest of the world.

Before he could reply to his mother she had already entered the room in her frightingly cheerful mood and embraced her son.

"There you are. I was already worried that you were out. Don't tell me you still do not have a girlfriend! We have to do something about this..."� looking around Mrs. Wood saw the mount of love letters and Valentine Cards and started to search through them.

Oliver wanted to stop her, but all that came out of his mouth was, "Your daddy must be a baker, 'cause you've got a nice set of buns."�

"Oliver Wood! Don't you dare say something like that to me again or I will wash your mouth with soap,"� said the scandalised woman.

But Oliver wasn't listening. Instead he paled and went to the candy box, lifted it and looked at it from all sides until he saw a little sign proclaiming:

"˜Corny Candies
Weasley's Wizards Wheezes'

Ignoring his mother he went to fetch his cloak, determined to have a word with Fred and George about sending him their joke candy without warning him beforehand. What if this had been someone important? Not that his mother wasn't important... He only hoped that she would forgive him for ignoring her and his departure. He didn't dare say anything else in her presence, fearing that he would say something similar embarrassing and get his mouth washed out.

Once he was fully dressed he apparated to Diagon Alley and the moment his slight disorientation had passed, he straightened up and headed to where he knew Fred and George's prank shop to be.

Unfortunately luck did not appear to be on his side, for he was stopped halfway there by an old friend. "Oliver, it is good to see you again. We could talk about the last few years over some Butterbeer."�

"Why do you have to be so damn fine every single day? Can't you take a break and let me concentrate on something else for a change?"� said Oliver annoyed.

A second later he realised what he had said and blushed. He had not meant to say that! But how could he tell Percy Weasley that he had eaten some of Fred and George's prank candy and could not say anything other than those god-damn corny lines? His old friend looked at him and said "You... you... you swing that way?"

Well he did swing that way, but he was most surely not interested in his friend. He shook his head slightly to signal his friend that he got it wrong when he suddenly had an idea on how to tell Percy that he was the victim of one of the twins' pranks. He quickly took his friend's arm and pulled him along until they arrived in front of the Weasley Twins store. Once there he pointed at the sign above the door and than he made an eating motion.

Being familiar with the pranks of the twins Percy realised quickly what Oliver meant and nodded with his head, showing his friend that he understood. He then promised he would help him to get an antidote and lecture them.

Together they went in and Oliver, who was by now very frustrated, went directly to the twins that stood behind the counter, planning to tell them off. Unfortunately all that came out of his mouth was another corny line, "Love is a complex word, but I think I just found the meaning of it."�

Upon realising what he just said he became even angrier, but before he could say anything else; Percy took his chance to translate what Oliver had said, "What he meant to say was that you are in deep trouble for playing a prank on him. Now get him the antidote and apologise! I'd like to be able to speak with him without being confronted with these corny lines he keeps saying. And Mum will hear about it!"�

Fred and George looked at each other confused, although someone that knew them very well could see that they had to try hard not to burst out laughing, and when they turned back around they asked in their most innocent voice, "What do you mean with we played a prank on him? Neither of us has seen him in weeks! How..."�

"Do you believe in love at first sight... or do I have to walk by again?"� interrupted Oliver the Twins. Realising that he once again had said something other than what he had intended to say he threw his hands up and sat on a near by chair, muttering to himself. "Did it hurt when you fell from heaven?"�

Not even being able to speak with himself he groaned. When would this stop? Suddenly reality hit him and he remembered that his mother was still at his flat and what he had said to her. That and the fact that he left without another word made him feel queasy. He would have hell to pay for that and he somehow doubted that his mother would accept the fact that he was played a prank on.

Before he could groan another time a piece of parchment and a quill was given to him. Startled he looked up only to see that one of the twins, he thought that it might be Fred, was the one to give him these things. Oliver thought that he looked very guilty suddenly for someone who claimed not to have played a prank on him "Maybe you can still write normally. That way you could tell us what happened."�

He took the offered utensils and turned around to the counter, using the wood of the counter to be able to write readable.

"˜I know that you were the ones that are responsible for this. You send me a candy box full of your joke candy. I will send my mother right here. It is after all your fault that I hit on her!!!'

He was glad that writing seemed to still work at least, although he did not know why he added the last part. They would tease him about this forever. However before he was able to give the note to anyone he added another line.

"˜Why don't I come sit on your lap, and we'll talk about the first thing that pops up?'

Reading what he wrote he groaned again. Would this never end? Before he had time to scratch out the last bit the note was taken out of his hand.

The twin that read the note started to blush and said to his brother, "You send this to Oliver? I thought it was meant for Harry? He is the one that tests all our products after all."�

"You mean Oliver got the package. Damn! Now Harry has the normal ones and the letter...,"� said the other twin before turning to Oliver and continuing, "Sorry about that. We apparently mixed up the boxes."�

In the meantime Percy was looking from the twins to Oliver and back again. Feeling a bit useless he quietly walked out of the door again. It wouldn't do well to get the twins to think that he would be a willing victim after all.

"I am new in town, can you give me directions to your apartment?"� asked Oliver before shaking his head. Why was it so easy to forget about this? He held his hand out, asking silently for the parchment and the quill.

"˜What about an antidote? Or how long do I have to wait until it wears of?'

Giving the parchment back to the twins, he waited for an answer.

"We are not sure about how long it works, but we think that it will wear of after about 3 hours. And since it is only a prototype...,"� answered the one on the right side.

The other twin looked as guilty as the first one, when he continued: "... there is no antidote yet."�

Oliver's eyes widened. Three hours and no antidote? That meant he would have to remain silent for at least another two! Without asking he took the parchment again and simply wrote:

"˜Than one of you is coming with me and will explain everything to my mother!'

And before he could do anything against it added once again another line.

"˜If I told you, you had a sexy body, would you hold it against me?'

The twins both knew what Oliver's mother was like and therefore none of them wanted to face her wrath and so they started to argue silently about who would go with Oliver. After some time Oliver had enough and simply took the arm of the twin standing closer to him, pulling him out of the door and in the direction of the apparation point. He did not care who did the explaining, all that mattered was that his mother knew what happened and that he could not say anything other than those god damn lines. It just had to happen on Valentine's Day?


A few hours and lots of more corny lines later, the effect finally wore of. Oliver leant back on his couch, glad that his mother had left for the duration of the prank and would most probably not come back before tomorrow. Now he only had to deal with the twins. His thoughts were once again interrupted by the sound of someone arriving through his fireplace. For a moment he feared that his mother decided to return now that it should be safe again. As if they had heard his thoughts, the twins opened the door and came in, one of them carrying flowers. Oliver was relived that it was not his mother.

"We wanted to say sorry once again. We honestly did not mean to send the joke candies to you,"� said one twin.

"...Although it was fun to watch you saying all those corny lines,"� added the other as an after thought.

Seeing them standing in the door, Oliver couldn't help himself and forgive them. In fact his heart did a little leap at the way they looked at him. He doubted that he had ever seen anything cuter than the way the two looked right now.

Simultaneously the two started walking and sat themselves on the couch so that Oliver was in the middle. He felt a bit awkward surrounded by the twins that way, but at the same time he felt content and warm and safe and... Here he stopped his thoughts. It couldn't be. He tried to deny it, but with both Fred and George next to him, touching him apparently by accident, he couldn't keep the denial up for long.

It seemed he had found someone he cared for closer to him than he thought he would. How could he have overseen them? It would have made the previous years so much easier. Now all he had to do was to tell them what he just realised. But were they even gay?

It appeared that luck was, for once, on his side and the twins took this task of him by telling him how they felt. The only thing that came to his mind was, "You... you... you swing that way, too?" And as if to prove it to him first one and then the other twin kissed him full on the lips. Needless to say that it soon became more heated and that the three of them decided in full agreement to move things to the bedroom after some time. All that was left in the room were the flowers lying on the table and all the other Valentine Cards, the candies, presents and flowers Oliver had gotten from his fans.


Who would have known that this would be the day that Oliver learned to love Valentine's Day and the next morning would be forever known as the day his mother found out that he was gay and although it came as quiet a shock to the woman she was still happy that her precious son had at least found someone, or to say it better two someones, he loved.

The end