"Lt. Wolfe, I assure you a formal welcoming was not necessary." The well-dressed Asian man closed the wallet and handed off it to an adjunct. As he closed to two arm lengths from the trussed-up man, he continued. "Though you could have at least dressed for the occasion." The captive's half-buttoned shirt was rumpled and partially untucked.
Before the detective had a chance to come up with a snappy retort, he was conked on the head. The assailant walked over to his boss.
"Dispose of him. Let the sharks eat well today."
"This is just too cool." Blair bounced in his airplane seat. Next to him sat Jim in a short sleeve turquoise shirt.
Jim smiled over at his roommate, partner, guide and best friend. "I'd think this would be old hat to a world traveler like yourself."
Admittedly, it wasn't a field project. But it was Hawaii during a Cascade winter! "Come on, Jim. I mean, I have a travel grant to track down some research leads, and you have a conference. And we are going to Hawaii!!"
Jim laughed at that. Even though Blair kept the whole conversation's volume toned down, it was still like Kermit ballying the next act. Which was kind of appropriate considering the lily pad patterned shirt the smaller man was wearing.
*What the hell?!* When he got rid of someone, they did not casually walk around outside airports. They didn't walk. Period.
"Isn't that..." The flunky cut off with one look from the other man. At the nod, he followed to settle incomplete business.
"What the..." Blair's exclamation was cut short as first the breath was knocked out of him by a barreling Jim, and then bullets whinged around them. "Who are they this time?" He doubted anyone had put money on the first hour after landing. *Guess the pool will rollover for once.*
Jim took out his gun from the ankle holster. *For once I'd like a peaceful vacation.* "Guess they don't like tourists."
*Jim?* Blair had gotten separated from the big detective during the shooting, and then completely turned around from the airport. "Jim, you are supposed to find me." Whispered under his breath, it should have been more than loud enough to pull out a lurking Sentinel. *As if he can't hear my heart beating out a tattoo from wherever he is.* As he continued his search, Blair picked his way over to a spot from which he could make out the ocean.
The sun felt good, and the sound of the waves hitting the small pebble beach was relaxing. He matched his breathing to the roil. Jim was somewhere, and he would find him. Blair started to calm a bit. Which was when he spotted the hand at the edge of the surf.
Scrambling down the short cliff was scraping up Blair's hands badly, and he skidded part of the way down on his backside. Running into the waves he found the form and started pulling. "Jim, man, you have got to help me here. You're heavy."
Sputtering, the other man roused. "Chief, stop dragging me over the rocks. Only my ex has that privilege." Opening his eyes, he pulled himself further onto the beach. "Somehow, I don't think this is a swimming accident." He looked down, contemplating the teal tank top, thoroughly sopped cream chinos and bare feet.
"Are you all right? Well, of course you aren't, you nearly drowned. How many fingers am I holding up?" He tried seeing if Jim's eyes were dilated, knowing that even with a concussion that was unlikely given how sunny it was.
"Four and a half. Who are you?" He looked around, hoping to find his shoes. The black pebbles really stored a lot of heat even this close to the water.
"Jim? Uh, Jim, I think I better get you to a hospital." Blair looked back the way he came and then down at his friend's bare feet. There was no way they could go back up over the rough lava. Actually, even looking at the steep incline wasn't making Blair feel so good. Seeing that further down there was some green, he pointed the other man down the beach.
"Do I know you?" He didn't feel drunk, but he also didn't think he regularly washed ashore in his clothes, either. As for the long haired kid, maybe twenty years ago he'd known somebody like him, but now?
"It's me, Blair. Are your eyes giving you trouble? Man, we are going to have a problem getting a cab to pick us up with you wet like that. Guess it's true, you really are nowhere without your towel."
He stopped and turned to the shorter man. "You okay there, Chief?" *My luck to be found by someone whose party started early.*
"I think that's my line. What happened to you? How did you get from the airport into the water? Come on, let's get you to a doctor.
"Amnesia?!" The sound echoed slightly in the long hall. He'd known Jim was a little out of it. Hell, it wasn't like knocking Jim in the noggin didn't affect him.
"Mr. Sandburg, this is a hospital. You say this has happened before?"
"Not this, exactly. But yeah, hitting Jim in the head is nearly a recognized sport back home. He's a detective. Here for the big police conference."
"I'd like to say this isn't major. Given his history of head trauma, most likely his memory will come back shortly. For now, he needs to rest. Is there someone that can check on him every couple of hours?"
"Yeah. The standard concussion stuff?"
"And Mr. Sandburg. Don't give him too much information. It's better if he remembers on his own."
"Where are we?" His clothes had pretty much dried out in the last several hours, though his shoes from the luggage felt funny. Having gone back to collect things from the airport and pick up the rental car, they now were at a very small hotel.
"Oh, I changed our reservations before we left. The rates are better here and I dare say it will be much quieter than the convention hotel. Come on, let's get signed in and you out of those clothes."
The officer looked over at the detective walking away from his collar of a pretty good-sized fish. Handed an object by one of the other uniforms on the scene he called out. "Hey Mack, you forgot your shield!" The other man just continued on his way. *Typical.*
Jim was at the end of his tether. When he had been unable to find Blair, he went back for the luggage. No luggage. Okay. Nabbing the bad guys had taken awhile, as had waiting for the locals. Blair circled back and went ahead to the hotel. Jim took a cab to the hotel. No Blair. No reservation. Nor even an open room.
It wasn't the first time for a vacation snafu. With any luck, his guide would come bouncing in announcing that he had found the perfect room and then had looked for Jim in half a dozen places before tracking him back to the original hotel, which Blair had left when he had learned of the room problem. So Jim went to eat at the hotel dining room, figuring he could at least make things easy on his partner.
The final straw was finding that all of his credit cards had been canceled. *Except one.* He had never been so embarrassed. Or glad to have a card go through. Where the hell could Sandburg be?
He looked with amazement at the man puttering around the other bed, unpacking. First that he could think of canceling his friend's credit cards. *Wallet must have gotten lost in the scuffle or the water.* Then that he could cancel them. Even without amnesia, he didn't think he could have canceled them. Not with numbers and everything. From memory. What really blew him away was how they were still able to register on the erstwhile Citibank card. Not that it didn't take a good amount of talking between the little guy, the girl on the phone and the desk clerk.
*And I don't remember him. Zip. Nada.* "We must be pretty good friends..."
Blair turned around with a smile, bumping the drawer closed. "The best, man. Look, why don't you grab a nap, and then we'll go have dinner. Good thing I was carrying the travelers' checks." He soundlessly chuckled as Jim got under the blankets still fully dressed, shoes casually toed off. *Guess you can't remember the rules either.* The thought sobered him up. What if this wasn't temporary?
After making a moderate dent in calling the area hotels, Jim was getting seriously worried about his missing partner. The notion that he might have claimed the luggage only to be overtaken by a third party was not outside the realm of possibility. With that thought he headed back out to the airport.
*Damn it Blair, it would be a lot easier to do this if you were just here!* The irony wasn't lost on him. After several hours scouring both inside and outside all he was sure of was that he was getting a headache. *At least there is nothing obvious.* Small comfort as it didn't assure the safety of his guide. Searching outside one more time, he spotted a corner peaking out at him from behind some crates. Focusing. A wallet. Picking it up he carefully smelled it. While it wasn't overwhelming, it did faintly smell of one of the men that had taken him and Blair by surprise earlier in the day. A slim lead was better than none. Though the driver's license was missing there was a business card with an address. 'Wolfe Enterprises'.
"What?" He poked his head out from the blankets, turning in the direction from which the missile had come.
"Come on, man. We have an island to explore. Can't believe you sleeping in."
"Someone kept waking me every two hours." He plopped onto his back. "Uh, can you tell me what the plan is?" The other man had been hesitant answering any but the most tangential questions at dinner last night.
"Well, the conference starts in a few days, and hopefully that will be plenty of time for me to rattle through the appropriate museums. Anything coming back? Come on, Hawaii is a'wasting."
It had started as a search. A highly illegal one, unless you counted a friendly dog as permission to enter. From there it had turned into an even more questionable stakeout. The reconnoiter around the small bungalow didn't give him a single clue as to where Blair might be. *This Wolfe is a mess.* Between a fridge scarier than anything his roommate could concoct and a living space that almost looked like it had been tossed a few times, he was seriously worried about whoever called this place home. *Can't believe I fell asleep.* "What're you looking at?" Great, he was talking to the guy's dog. *A guy that 'casually' posts his HIV tests on the message board.* "Just because I fed you last night doesn't make you mine."
It was very easy to forget he couldn't remember much. That's how comfortable he felt around Blair. Apparently the younger man felt the same way as he pointed out one thing after another.
"Here, Jim." Blair held a shirt against his friend. Scrutinizing for a moment he turned back to the vender and paid for the turquoise shirt with emerald green fern and palm fronds and large hibiscus blossoms. "Try it on."
Looking at the loud shirt, he smiled incredulously, and then quickly unbuttoned his shirt, pulling on the gift. "You carry that." He laughed as Blair stared at the balled up shirt thrown at him.
"What percent of them do you think are real?" Blair looked over to Jim. After walking, they had stopped on the beach to sit for awhile.
"What are real?" He was wondering why the younger man was always whispering.
"You know." He angled his head towards the jiggling women. Jim's reaction took him aback. Instead of the long suffering sigh or the teasing cuff across the head the other man actually looked shocked. "Well? Nature or man-made."
"How should I know?" *What, do I usually conduct a survey?* He really didn't understand the expression his friend was turning on him.
"Look. It's not like those suits cover much." *Sometimes I really wonder about you.* Whispering even lower, he continued. "Faint scars here or here."
*So you do the investigations.* Turning away from the hairy diagram before he started laughing, he settled himself. "I am not going on your 'fact-finding' mission."
*Shit.* "Jim, what do you see at the horizon line?" *Double shit.* That he recounted exactly what Blair could make out was not good. *How do you 'forget' senses?* It was a stupid question; this was Jim after all. "Okay, Jim. I want you to picture a stereo console with five dials."
*What the hell am I?* For a moment everything was too loud, too bright... just too too much.
"Calm down, Jim." Blair rested his hand between Jim's shoulder blades as he mentally berated himself for being seven kinds of fool. Carefully he guided them to a secluded spot. "Better?"
"Yeah." He looked around. Everything seemed tweaked up just a bit but not painfully. Like somebody with had turned up the contrast on everything. "Blair, who am I really? Who are you?"
Blair weighed the questions and the doctor's advice. "You are a Sentinel. You have a genetic advantage with your senses."
"And you are my keeper." *Just somebody's experiment.*
"I'm your Guide. Jim, come on." Suddenly Blair came up with an eighth form of idiocy. "Whatever conspiracy scenario you are hatching, deep-six it."
"You are my Guide." *Riiight.* He'd been in the military. Heard the rumors and knew enough that not all of them were false.
"And you are a modern genetic throwback. See, I was doing research on Burton's theory and then I found out about you" Blair clamped a hand over his mouth. The other man stared back at him. "I can't tell you about all the particulars. Look, I can't. It's all wrapped up with the last, man, decade or so of your life and all of the time I've known you, plus."
"But this is normal for me? I was born like this?" He didn't know why he was believing this. Somehow it was just natural to trust Blair.
"More or less. Best I can tell, they weren't always expressed. Probably a good thing; they can get you into trouble. That's where a Guide comes in handy."
*What's in it for you?*
Jim was getting nowhere fast. Not only was his continuing search of the hotels not turning up his partner, it also wasn't finding him a vacant room. "Where the hell are you, Blair?"
"I can't believe you were eating pineapple. Simon's danishes will never be safe again." Blair laughed at the 'what' expression Jim was giving him. Relaxed, the tough cop was really just a big kid. *One with a newly discovered toy.* After the earlier scare with his senses, the older man had really thrown himself into them and it was all Blair could do to keep up.
"You have got to pace yourself. If for no other reason, then for me." Keeping an eye out for potential zone outs was hard when _everything_ was catching Jim's attention.
What the? Blair staggered back unable to look at his friend. *He kissed me.* More than that, Jim had kept Blair from realizing it for several seconds. Action, reaction. No thought.
Shit. It had seemed like the right thing to do. Now Blair was shutting down. He tried to push back how good it had felt, and watched as Blair turned away from him. "Blair." Carefully he moved closer. Taking Blair not running as a good sign, he hesitantly reached out. "Must have gotten my signals crossed."
"Jim?" This time, Blair saw the kiss coming and didn't step out of the way. The teeny part of his brain still communicating wondered when Jim had learned to kiss like this. It was like a soft gentle rain, and felt like it could last forever, though it didn't. He watched as the other man tried to frame words. "Can't believe I haven't done that before. We really live together?"
"Um, yeah." As his brain slowly slid back, his anxiety rushed him. "Why now?" Plausible deniability swarmed with a number of other contenders. Jim was in his touch-as-communication mode and after a few more 'romantic' touches he was back to 'friends'.
Blair woke up curled with Jim on one of the beds. Both were still dressed. Upon their return to the hotel room, they had kissed again, by mutual movement. Which had led to holding and caressing. More kissing. Between an indecisive Blair and a silently pleading Jim, they ended up in the same bed where they fell asleep.
Now the Blair that had gone to sleep nervous had woken up in the middle of the night horny. For Jim, his very male best friend. With whom he was curled up. Who was now blinking back at him.
*Oh my G-d.* The twin lights of bashfulness and desire were heady. "Blair." Whatever he was going to say was cut off by a hungry claiming of his mouth. It was with some difficulty that he managed to turn on the bedside lamp. He answered the questioning eyes. "If we are going to do this, the light has to be on." He waited for the other man to nod in assent. With that he took gentle possession of Blair's mouth, rolling them onto their sides.
Gradually their clothes melted away as buttons were undone and fabric pushed aside. Flesh was licked, lapped and laved, nipped and nuzzled. Skin slid against skin as they slowly ascended until they finally slalomed to their completion.
"I need to go to the archive." So it wasn't the smoothest thing Blair had ever said. *I am out of control. Totally.* On waking a second time, there'd been an explosive round of lovemaking, and it's subsequent shower. Now, with breakfast over, he needed time to think.
"Mind if I come along?"
Jim's question surprised him, but not nearly as much as his acceptance.
In the end, his thinking didn't take nearly as long as he had expected. Possibly from the confident adoration that met him whenever Jim looked over towards him. Partially because his brain was overruled by his cock, which had a monopoly on the blood supply. Knowing retreat was best, they headed back to the hotel and their room.
"Thought you needed to do some research?" The shorter man was making a concerted campaign on his mouth, face and neck, working his way down and up again as he freed buttons on the impeding shirt.
"We'll run some tests later." These were Blair's last coherent words as he focused on Jim's smooth chest. So much territory. His own senses were in danger of overloading on the feedback to every swipe of tongue, every little moan and shiver as he ran fingertips along each contour.
With thick fingers he unbuttoned the smaller man's shirt, toying with the hair there as he moved to the next one. With his target in sight he pounced, sucking and tasting Blair's chest. Both writhing on the bed, they stilled momentarily to divest themselves of pants and boxers.
Soul-searing kisses later, he once more worked his way down the curl covered chest, the furred stomach and claimed the thick prize standing proud.
*G-D!!! * Blair's eyes opened wide and then snapped shut. Only the strong hands holding his shoulders down kept him from bolting upright. The sight of Jim, burned on the insides of his eyelids, taking his full length into that incredible mouth was mind-shattering. What it felt like was a miracle. Heat and moisture and pressure. Firm lips slid up and down, tongue caressing and then licking when barely more than the tip was inside.
Each time he was about to cum, Jim would slow or change rhythm. Finally, with a hard suction he was flung to completion.
Swallowing his reward, the big man stretched back over his limp lover, nuzzling beneath each ear. Grazing lips over the sheening neck. Pressing his hardness into the soft warmth of Blair's thighs he undulated to release.
*Uhmmm* Slowly Blair's eyes fluttered open. Jim was snuggled tight to his side, partly draped over him. "You make a wonderful blanket."
"Got beautiful pillow." The words were muffled by Blair's shoulder. He gathered the 'pillow', tucking him chest to chest. Snuggling turned to caresses and sleep melted into passion.
With reluctance it was decided that they really needed a meal before further exertions. A quick meal later they were back in the room in a frantic thrusting of bodies.
*Blair.* He could hear Blair. And he was pissed. His guide was busy partying instead of worrying about where Jim was. It was enough to make him play fast and loose with the desk clerk, his badge and a room key.
When he pounded the door open, his first thought was his hearing had been playing tricks on him. As a face peered out from under the big naked guy, he wished it was that simple. "Sandburg?"
He followed Blair's shocked stare and looked up. Ice blue eyes locked on each other, while Blair scrambled out of bed with the sheet.
"Who are you?" Both men said it at the same time. "Jim Ellison." Replied both, again in unison. *What?!* Somehow Jim had the presence to shut the room door at this point. It was like staring into a mirror, barring the fact his reflection had never been naked when he was dressed.
"Blair." He turned, looking for support. Focusing himself on the bathroom and underneath the sound of the shower he could hear muffled crying. Unable to believe there were really two Jim Ellisons, he nodded the other man toward the head. *Who am I?*
Jim made his way to the bathroom door, filing away the twilight zone he had walked into for later. "Blair. It's Jim. Chief." Realizing the door wasn't locked he never the less paused. He had just barged in on a very private moment. That Blair had thought that private moment involved Jim... Who the hell had Sandburg been fucking? That propelled him through the door.
Braced for a steamy room, he was hit by the cold air coming from the shower. Slamming the water off, Jim tried to get a grip on the thoughts tumbling through his mind. In the end he settled for handing Blair a huge towel and pulling him out of the cold bathroom.
Not-Jim had wrapped one of the large hotel towels around his waist before Blair was brought out of the bathroom shivering. Instinctively coming over, he hesitated at the glare Jim gave him.
The nearly palpable tension roused Blair. The fog burned away; he saw the two Jims facing off. "Um." What could he say? Clearly the amnesiac Jim wasn't really Jim, but then who was he? "Do you have another brother you didn't mention?" He looked at the clothed Jim, nodding to the one in the towel.
Jim's eyes glowered at man in the towel. "Who are you." It was all order. *What are you doing with my Blair?*
Not-Jim dropped heavily to the tousled bed. "I don't know." *Who am I? What am I?*
"I thought he was you He couldn't remember Found him washed up on the beach" Each statement was more jangled as he rushed to explain.
"Slow down Chief. Deep breaths." Sitting them down in the closest spot, somewhat to the left of the remaining man, Jim worked at calming the smaller man. *Don't hyperventilate on me.*
"I couldn't find you, and then I saw him down in the surf and I went down to help you and you couldn't remember anything and he has amnesia and then you couldn't use your senses and..." Blair cut off as the hand squeezed his shoulder. *Jim?*
Not-Jim looked up when he felt the boring stare. As from a distance he heard Blair talk about his senses. About Jim's senses. It was all jumbled to him. In his confusion he reflected a look Jim knew too well, having seen it stare countless times from the magazine cover.
Blair realized that Jim, and also Not-Jim, had zoned. The hand on his shoulder pinned him where he sat. With difficulty he reached a discarded shirt and tossed it over Not-Jim's head while he worked at bringing Jim out of his zone. Assured that he was okay he pointed him away and uncovered Not-Jim.
Jim fidgeted while Blair brought the impostor out of his zone. It was too seductive, too voyeuristic. That train of thought was mercifully ended when Blair stepped back from the other man. "Blair?"
"Oh man." There were too many things all queuing up for him to process. He sat back on the bed, noticing he was wearing only a towel when he tried to tuck his legs under him. The past span hit him with renewed force.
The start of Blair's shakes had both of the large men at his side. Eventually they calmed Blair to ragged breaths. When he was stable, Not-Jim retreated briefly to the bathroom, snagging a pair of boxers and pants as he went. With him gone, Jim quickly found Blair clean boxers and a t-shirt, turning while his guide dressed.
Blair looked first at Jim and then the other Jim. *I am not going to lose it. I'm calm.* "Where the hell have you been?" This was Jim's fault. Wasn't it?
*Looking for you.* Thinking that I had let you down. Jim stayed quiet as more unsettling thoughts shifted.
Not-Jim observed Blair and Jim. Who he was pushed aside for learning who he wasn't. *Why does he love you?* That much not-Jim was certain. "What scares you more, Jim?"
Jim jerked his head up. Why did he keep spacing the other player? *That I can't get rid of you.* He turned slightly towards Blair. "How fast did you two get in the sack?"
"Jealous, huh?" Having whispered it, he wasn't prepared at both Jim and Blair staring at him. *Blair...* His fingers trailed the air just above the smaller man's arms.
"Don't. You. Start." The words were directed towards Jim as he glared forward at his lover. Getting off the bed he started pacing. "I am not easy." Wasn't he? "I am not a trophy." Got that right.
*Blair.* Jim was getting worried. Somehow the diatribe was off. As if it was as much, if not more, self-directed.
Jim opened his eyes. Then he realized what sounded wrong. Instead of Blair's heartbeat coming from a distance, it was right next to him. *One too many zone-outs?* And in addition to that of his guide and his own, there was a third beat. That was just faintly off from Jim's own. *We are a big sorry mess.* Jim could remember an exhausted, flustered Blair. They must have all fallen asleep on one big bed during the last stand-off. Thinking that figuring out who the stranger was the next priority, Jim was startled when Blair kneaded knuckles into his chest. Pushing his sleeping guide away slightly, Blair turned over and snuggled into the bulk on his other side.
*That feels good.* Slowly something disturbing pulled him from sleep. Opening his eyes, it all started pouring back. He wasn't Jim, and Jim had shown up. He snapped out of the memories, realizing that the other man was awake and staring at Blair mouthing the bare chest in front of him. Disengaging as carefully as he could he then roused Blair.
"Huhmm." Blair noted that he was nicely warm on both sides. One eye, then the other opened. *Still dreaming. Two Jims.* He closed both eyes. Opened one. Two Jims. Closed it and opened the other. Still two Jims. Reopened the other eye. *Not still dreaming.* "Guess I have to be awake." Sitting up he pushed himself down and off the end of the bed, heading to the bathroom.
Jim wondered what they were going to do about this. He had to do something. He was good with problem, action, solution. *I'm going to lose him.* Had Blair been waiting for this? Would Blair leave him for this stranger? *He's a Sentinel.* Wasn't that, and danger all Jim offered? Or would Blair just start running again? His dissertation was nearly written. He looked at the other man. *This is all your fault.*
"Jim, that's enough." Blair had tuned out pretty well in the shower, trying to figure out how he and Jim would work through this. If they could work through this. Hell, if he could 'process'. His thoughts had been disturbed by shouting. Blair stared up at Jim as he pushed the older man away from *damn you need a name.* He turned back to Jim. "What is wrong with you?!" Gesturing for Jim to stay still, he checked on the ersatz Jim. *Great, two stoic posturing pre-civilized genetic throwbacks.* "What was that all about?" No answer.
Not-Jim faced off from his rival. He was going to lose Blair. But he was adamant on not losing these past few days. *Remember that, Ellison.* He wasn't going to mess up Blair's memories. *Just don't forget you are a lucky SOB.*
As quickly as Blair gained control, he lost it again. *Man this would not be the way to get hurt.* Unable to break into the shoving match, he considered his options if things got serious.
"You want him and can't admit it." The words hung in the air. The three men were frozen. Blair waited for a denial that never came. Jim waited for a retort that never manifested. Not-Jim just waited.
"With any luck, you weren't traveling alone, and someone put out a missing person report on you." Jim glanced over, ostensibly looking at the rearview mirror as they drove to the police station. He hoped that Blair was okay on his own. The younger man insisted that he had research to do, and Jim couldn't argue against dropping him at the museum.
"You really hate me. Guess that's fair. Not that wild about you either."
Jim knew he was being baited and let it go. *Think you can get sympathy points so easy?* He was on thin ice already; pounding on the interloper would not encourage Blair to stay.
As they entered the station, Jim wondered why he was having such an easy time gaining access. In Cascade he had half a dozen check points to go through.
"Mack, why haven't you been in..." The captain stopped dead in his tracks. No, he had finally been driven mad. He looked at the man standing behind his most problematical detective. *Not two of you. The world does not need two of you.*
Jim looked at the man before him. "I'm here to see if anyone has reported him missing."
*I've lost him.* That was Jim's first thought when he learned Mack was local. Blair only stayed put in Cascade, put up with the weather, because of the work. *His dissertation is nearly done.* And here was a brand-new Sentinel cop who lived in Hawaii.
"He wasn't too happy." Mack was having a hard time reconciling 'his' past, with the account he'd overheard Capt. Herzog give Ellison. He turned to Blair. "I think he was trying to figure out how to send me to Cascade."
Blair started laughing. Hard. Very hard. He tried calming down when Jim glared at him. On a second try, he managed speech. "Sorry, Jim. But think of it from Simon's point of view. Face it, he'd be very tempted." He turned to Mack. "You don't have a habit of high collateral damage?" Oh, yeah.
*Yeah. Until he had to deal with Mack's self-inflicted financial woes.* With any luck, Jim could get Sandburg back to Washington before he realized what a loser Wolfe really was. Speaking of. "This is yours." He threw the wallet on the table. "We can drop you off."
Jim knew he couldn't get off so easy. Blair insisted on standing by Mack. Piecing together that the gunmen at the airport were somehow involved in Mack's current condition, Sandburg played every angle to wheedle his way. Which was playing nursemaid to Wolfe. While Jim watched.
*Isn't this fun?* Not. The tension was unnerving Blair. Mack alternated between furtive longing looks and a truly piteous 'kicked to the curb' stoicism. Jim. *I am not going there.* Right now, things were well and truly screwed. *Stop that.* It was too late. *Switch set, runaway engine.* Knowing it was pointless with two Sentinels, Blair stalked into the bathroom.
*Tease.* Blair had to know a hotel door, while it might block sight, did nothing about sound. With that thought, Mack set back to enjoy.
No. Jim was not going to listen. Why couldn't he dial down his
hearing? He tried to ignore the fricative sound of chest hair being
rubbed with strong hands. *No.* Not smell. He thought about leaving.
*Without dragging Wolfe out?*
*'Have you no shame?'* Besides that one corner of his mind,apparently not. In all the time he had lived in the loft, he'd purposefully only masturbated when Jim was gone for several hours. Enough to have time left over for scrubbing the bathroom or/and doing several loads of laundry.
*Program over.* As Mack returned from his aroused daze, he noticed Jim grinding his teeth. *You'll crack those, one of these days.* He was wondering whether hands could be crushed by clenching them too hard when Blair exited the bathroom.
Jim felt a blow to his chest from the satisfied look on his guide's face. An expression Jim hadn't seen before. *Mack has.* And been the cause of it; how many times? Jim got off the bed and walked over to the younger man.
Blair turned as he felt the presence, face nearly on Jim's chest. He slowly looked up. As he did, his hair was smoothed with infinite care. *What is it going to be?*
*No.* Mack couldn't watch this. Jim either was saying good-bye or hello and either way it closed his chapter with Blair. "Don't hurt him."
Jim ignored Mack. He was lost in a silent appreciation of his Guide, recalling every moment they had shared. "Could it have been me?" He grabbed Blair, semi-lifting the shorter man as he pressed close. Jim traced the jaw from ear to lip.
"Can it?" Blair pulled back, still aware of the heat coming off Jim. "Can you want me? Me. Not something you've lost..."
Mack stepped behind, wrapping himself around Blair. He calmed as Blair melded into his embrace. *You're not leaving.*
"Not something another wants. I demand more than that. Deserve more than that."
Jim almost said 'best wishes' and left. Instead he kissed Blair, claimed his mouth with a relentless softness until their breath was gone. Standing back but an inch he saw Mack withdraw.
"Mack." Blair scrambled to keep his world from unraveling. He sighed in relief as his recent lover burrowed face first into his still damp neck. Pleading eyes latched onto Jim. Blair sparked as Jim walked into his arms.
Blair couldn't believe this was his life. But here he was being loved by two men. *Jim.* That was the really bizarre part. That Jim would go along with it. Keeping his eyes open was impossible. Exciting as looking at the identical men was, it was also disorienting. *They are not the same.* Jim was on his left. The real Jim, while his lover, the man he had thought was Jim, was on his right. *Mack.* It was uncanny how similar, up to a point, the two men's lives were. "Oh G-D." Contemplation had a time and place and this was neither.
*Taste so good. Feel so good. Sound so good.* A small part of Jim's mind was screaming at him that he was making out with a man. That it was more than a bad thing, that that was the worst thing. A softer voice, one harder to ignore, iterated the dance was a little crowded. Unwilling to be distracted, he shut them off together and kept his eyes closed.
Mack was making do with his half a loaf, wishing Jim had never turned up. Part of his mind felt the other man had forfeited everything by not making a play earlier. *And why is my life so not worth remembering?* Being Jim had made him want his memories. Not being Jim made him jealous of Jim's memories. Pushing thought away, he concentrated on Blair.
He was so hard. Two mouths sucking, biting, tonguing here, blowing there. Countless hands stroking, toying, carding, pinching, grabbing, kneading. Nothing where he needed. Close, so damn close. First one, then the other. Working their ways towards and detouring around. *Let me!* He was thrashing so hard that he barely felt the two touches as his world stopped and started back up in slow motion as he came.
Blair stretched into the warmth. Slowly his lids lifted. He could feel his cock filling at the sight of two Jims licking him clean. He sank into the sensation as he was given a very thorough tongue bath. *Oh G-d.* He arched up, the tremors building in his groin as his cock and balls were gently besieged. The concentration subsided as the two wet heats diverged, one seeking the backs of his knees and the other heading for his nipples. He mewled needily.
Sweet torture built as one mouth wandered from inner thighs to belly and back again, while the other ranged nipples and neck and mouth. Blair tried to work his way down from the kiss as his hands spasmed uselessly. The bed shifted and he could reach his goal, sucking one and then the other nipple. As he worked down, the body crawled up until knees were tight in his armpits.
Mack hissed as the mouth below him kissed his tip, struggling not to plunge into the wet heat. Slowly he was pulled in, arms wrapped around the back of his legs.
Jim nestled between Blair's thighs, gingerly trying to take the length. After a few halting attempts, he slowly pumped the organ in and out of his mouth.
Blair was drawn tight as he sawed from being filled and being consumed. When he thought he couldn't possibly go any higher the sensations synchronized. In, away. In, away. Sure that he would launch any moment, the pattern alternated. It swapped back and forth until he locked his knees behind one head, and arms around other thighs and sucked and thrusted hard. Swallowing and spilling as a single action.
Jim eased the legs from their vise-like hold on his head. Whapping Mack on the calf he encouraged him aside, and then sprawled sticky stomach to Blair's side.
Mack looked around at what was supposedly his home. Other than the friendly dog nothing reached out to him. Straightening things up as he went, he tried to figure out what he was. A reason he couldn't have just stayed Jim.
Mack stood absolutely still, clutching the room key. The smell of sex was heavy in the air. The scent of Blair and him. *Not me. Jim.*
Blair looked up from the bed he shared with Jim. Had just 'shared' with Jim. *Mack.* The look of forlorn astonishment tore at him.
Mack wasn't sure what he was feeling. He didn't have any right to feel betrayed. While nothing had been said, he knew Blair would be returning to the mainland with Jim. Back to their lives. Lives together.
*Damn it.* He'd taken the chance and Jim was cashing in the chips. *He ain't some lousy prize.* Mack for once had hit the jackpot, the only one that really mattered. *Borrowed lives, borrowed love.*
Jim roused as he picked up on the changes in Blair. *What is it?* His hand was caught before he could soothe. *Mack's back.* He tried to project strength which was difficult considering the situation.
Mack turned on his heels and stalked out.
Blair looked from the door, to the bed and back to the door.
"Go ahead." Blair looked back questioningly. "Go on." *I'll still be here.* With a smile of thanks, Blair scrambled out of bed, pulled on some clothes and bounded out of the room. Jim sat there, worrying the blankets before heading to the shower.
Mack tried to ignore the presence from across the patio. *Damn it.* These senses could be very frustrating. He acknowledged Blair, waiting for the man to come over. *I really don't want to talk.*
Blair was pained by the expression he found. "Mack." *I've really messed up.* For all his reputation with the Cascade PD, Blair had never had two lovers at the same time and had never cheated. *Guess you're going for a hat trick this vacation.* He'd never been with a man before, either.
Jim couldn't believe this. *He expects me to... to fuck him.* Couldn't believe that Blair had suggested it. *Thinking that it would 'fix' things.* Couldn't believe Mack accepted it. Really couldn't believe he'd agreed to it. Actually, it had taken quite a bit of persuasion. *Is he really ready for this? Am I?* Lying behind Blair, Jim caressed and soothed while Mack did much the same from the front. As he calmed and aroused Blair, his own thoughts stilled.
"Jim." It was a whispered reminder and permission. He was playing with fire and while no one would be left unchanged he couldn't think of any other way. Somehow he and Mack had to make their peace or it would damage his relationship with Jim through guilt and recriminations. Slowly Jim trailed fingers past the small of Blair's back and along his cleft. Mack gentled him as he tensed. Relaxing, he not-waited for the finger to pass again.
Jim had to collect himself. As long as he was slow and gentle, everything would be fine. Blair said so, and Jim had long given up not trusting the younger man. Confidence in himself was another story. Carefully he applied gel to one finger, which he eased into Blair.
"Oh!" "It's okay." Different, but okay. More strange was kissing Mack while Jim prepared, well, prepared. The digit slid in and out, until Blair just registered it as another pleasant sensation. He gave a little moan as a second slicked finger joined the first.
It was too tight, he was going to hurt Blair. And then the muscle relaxed some more. Very tight, but not impeding the movement. Slowly he worked at stretching Blair.
Mack felt the release of air into his mouth as the third finger entered. Distracting Blair he hoped it kept the man relaxed; Blair had said that was the important thing. From the noises the wriggling handful was making, Mack thought it was a pretty sure bet.
*Man.* Blair gathered his wits, which was a feat considering. He turned over his shoulder, whispering so lightly he couldn't hear the words. "Sit up." Turning back he told Mack less quietly to pull him off the bed. Once Blair was standing where he wanted, just in front of Jim's legs, he snagged a pillow and dropped it in front of him.
"Blair." Both concerned cops were shrugged off. He was adamant, and they were going to follow.
Jim tried to calm down. What little he knew, mostly from his time in Vice, told him this wasn't the easiest way. Simple physics gave him several reasons against this position. *If I'm careful.* The mechanics weren't impossible, just tricky; Blair was trusting him to make this work. Relubing his fingers, he eased the three back into Blair. Pulling him back closer, Jim kissed the back and then withdrew so he could coat his cock.
Mack scooted the pillow closer to Blair's feet while kissing the neck before him. Slowly he worked his way down to the hairy chest, kissing and licking. He could smell Blair leaking.
"Now." Blair flowed into being guided down and back, hanging just above Jim. Slowly, so slowly, he was lowered onto and into Jim's lap. "Ahhhhh...."
Mack looked into the wide eyes, keeping contact as he knelt. One long swipe along and around the head of the beading cock. He went slowly, concentrating on anything to keep from coming.
So hot. And smooth. So damn tight. Jim started rocking his hips and pulling up on Blair. Nuzzling under each ear, he tried to hold on for Blair. What seemed an eternity exploded as Blair clamped hard, wringing the older man's completion from him.
Mack swallowed repeatedly, coming all over himself. It was with great difficulty he helped shift the limp Blair back onto the bed, and crawled in himself. Kissing Blair, he succumbed to sleep.
Blair turned back to Jim, bestowing a kiss flavored with his own seed.
He couldn't stop thinking. What were things going to be like when he and Jim went back to Cascade? They really hadn't had time to discuss how this changed things between them. What with the conference that took up Jim's days and well into the evenings, and Blair's research they rarely met away from the room. He smiled wryly, glancing from one side to the other. *Hope I don't get bored at home.* Sobered by that thought, he wondered how Mack would cope once Blair was gone. He was already back on desk duty, waiting for the staff psychologist's okay.
Mack fingered the beer bottle, watching Blair swallow. Before the younger man could raise his drink back to his lips, he started to speak. "I've been thinking." He barreled through the wise-ass smile. "I want you to fuck me."
Blair had not heard that right. *No, I heard it all right.* "Mack, you know that, you know..." He just couldn't say it. Blair had never been good at ending relationships.
"I'm not looking for forever. Came in a little late for that contract."
Blair didn't believe it for a moment. It was what made things so hard; Mack could be so much like Jim at times. Even while he was slipping back into old habits as his past became more real to him. "I don't want to hurt you... any more than I already have." As he said it, he knew that he would agree. He never had that much resistance to Jim either.
"Are you sure?" Blair was taken aback by the confidence for him in those eyes. Blair pressed in the waiting slick finger, wriggling it as muscles relaxed. Leaning forward he coaxed the man lying before him. He was puzzled that Mack wanted this. *I have got to stop transposing him with Jim.* Working slowly, stretching Mack to accept three fingers, Blair braced himself for the next part while his ass was lubed and filled. Pulling Mack closer he was shocked as Jim reached from behind to gel Blair's length. With difficulty he got Mack's cantilevered body into position.
*Connected.* It was missing from his 'real' life, his life before Blair. Since he couldn't have forever, he was going to have as much now as he could. *So much.* Maybe it wasn't right to ask that of Blair. It certainly wasn't fair. *Neither was finding what I can't keep.* This though, would remain. With that thought he lost himself to sensation.
*I love you so much, Blair.* Which was why Jim was doing this. Partly out of fear and partly as penitence. Fear of Blair choosing Mack, regardless of whether Blair came back to Cascade. Penitence for not figuring out their love earlier, for needing this wake up call. Mostly because Blair asked. *G-d, you trust me with so much, Blair.* What he had ever done to deserve that kind of trust, he didn't know. *Love you, Love.*
Blair couldn't believe anything felt like this. He had neither words nor equations to describe what was happening. Maybe living inside of a raga. Maybe. Sometimes he was surrounded and full, sometimes one or the other, occasionally nearly neither. As it built higher and higher the pattern started to crumble and Blair was tossed free. Taking the others with him.
"Guess this means you get to collect on the pool?" Mack really didn't want to be here, seeing Blair and Jim off. *You owe him at least that.*
"What?" Jim looked at the man looking away. *Very funny, Chief.* "Take care." The handshake aborted into a low wave. Jim stepped to one side.
"You've got Jim's work number if you start having problems." Blair shifted awkwardly and then bounced up to give a peck on the cheek. "Got that?" With the squeeze on Mack's hand Blair moved off with Jim, and headed for the boarding line.
When Mack could no longer see the windows on the plane, he left.
Finis