Author's Notes: The challenge was to write a story of 1000 words or less in which an SG-1 member suffers a minor injury in a bizarre accident "caused" by another team member to set up a H/C situation. Exactly 1000 words.
DISCLAIMER: All characters and property of Stargate SG-1 belong to MGM/UA, World Gekko Corp. and Double Secret Productions. This fan fiction was created solely for entertainment and no money was made from it. Also, no copyright or trademark infringement was intended. Any similarity to real persons, living or dead, is coincidental and not intended by the author. Any other characters, the storyline and the actual story are the property of the author.
"I told you, I'm fine. Just leave me alone," Daniel said grouchily. Without looking up, he reached for the coffee cup that normally sat on his desk by his left hand. He picked it up and grimaced as he realized, for the tenth time that day, that it was empty.
"You know, you've been a bear for the last two days," Sam complained.
"DanielJackson does not look like a bear, Captain Carter." Teal'c mouth quirked in amusement. He enjoyed teasing the Tau'Ri about some of their strange idioms.
Sam sighed. "It's just an expression, Teal'c. It means he's a grouch."
Jack looked up from the Astronomy magazine he was reading and grinned. "I know what his problem is. Janet still won't let him drink since that bug he picked up on P4J572."
"This doesn't appear to bother you or Captain Carter," Teal'c observed.
"I'll admit I enjoy a cup of coffee in the morning, but Daniel is practically addicted to the stuff," Jack didn't even try to keep the laughter out of his voice.
At that, Sam laughed, too. Daniel was normally composed and in control of himself. Coffee was his greatest weakness.
"I'm not addicted!" Daniel's voice had a petulant whine to it. "Anyway, this ban is stupid. I'm completely over that now." He glanced forlornly at the empty coffee pot on the table beside him.
Jack sighed and dropped the magazine. He heaved himself off the couch and said "All right kids, let's go ask Janet if she can lift the ban now, before Daniel bites someone's head off."
Sam and Teal'c got up to follow. Daniel bounced up out of his chair after them. He was halfway through the door when a loud bang stopped them all in their tracks.
"What was that?" Jack demanded.
Daniel swore softly and held the doorpost for support. "I don't know, but something just hit me in the back."
Sam and Teal'c were quickly beside him and grabbed his arms. "Don't move, Daniel," Sam said. "You have something sticking out of your back." The cut was bloody but it didn't appear to be too serious.
Jack took command of the situation, "You two get him down to the infirmary, I'm going to find out what happened here." The other three went out the door headed once more to the infirmary.
Jack stepped back toward Daniel's desk and saw pieces of glass scattered all over, along with the remnants of the plastic handle of Daniel's coffee pot. He moved his hand near the coffee maker and felt the heat from the burner. He reached out and flipped off the switch. With a small smile on his face, he headed for the infirmary himself.
Thirty minutes later, Janet sighed in relief as she finished removing the chunk of glass and stitching up the cut in Daniel's back. Her patient had been complaining ever since he had arrived.
"Okay, you can go. You know the drill, don't get the stiches wet and come back if there's any problem. And yes, you can drink coffee again." Anything to get him to stop whining about it.
"Actually, there may be a small problem with that." A small smile played around the edges of Jack's lips.
"What do you mean a problem?" Daniel's voice was wary. He didn't trust that smile.
"Did you maybe forget to turn the coffee pot off last time?" Jack voice was teasing.
"No," Daniel replied, puzzled. "I haven't turned it on for days. You know Janet told me no coffee."
"Oops." They all turned to look at Sam, who was turning bright red. "That might have been me."
"What are you talking about, Sam?" Daniel asked.
"Well, you know I stayed late last night working on those samples from P3C282." Sam clearly didn't want to deal with this.
"What does that have to do with anything?" Daniel asked.
"Well, I knew you had better coffee than the cafeteria, so I borrowed your coffee maker."
"You know that's not a problem. You're all welcome to use it anytime you want." Daniel was puzzled at how Sam was acting.
Jack cleared his throat. "Well, actually there is a small problem. Do you remember I told you a couple of weeks ago that the light on the switch had burned out?"
Daniel nodded, still not understanding.
"Captain Carter?" Jack prodded.
By now, Sam was very red. "I think maybe he's trying to tell you that I forgot to turn off the burner."
"So what?" Daniel was getting impatient. Behind him Janet had figured out what was going on and was grinning widely.
"Well..." she paused.
"Daniel, what she's trying to say is that your coffee pot is gone," Jack's smile had developed into a full grin.
"I'm so sorry Daniel, I'll get you a new coffee maker," Sam said quickly.
"It's no big deal, Sam. I needed to get a new one anyway. What's this all about?"
Swallowing hard, she rushed through the rest of her confession. "If you leave an empty glass pot on a hot burner, the glass heats up and eventually explodes."
While Daniel stared at her uncomprehendingly, Jack and Janet began openly laughing. Even Teal'c had a slight smile.
"Are you trying to tell me..." Daniel's voice trailed off as he looked over at the bloody object on the medical tray next to him. "That thing you took out of my back was part of my coffee pot?" Daniel turned a stunned look on Janet.
"I'm so sorry, Daniel," Sam was horrified at the realization that her forgetfulness had caused Daniel's injury. She was shocked to see Daniel starting to shake.
Daniel burst out laughing. "Well Janet, you always said that all that coffee was bad for me! Come on, Sam, let's go get a coffee maker. You can drive, but I'm going to buy it, the old one was broken anyway."
Putting an arm around his teammate's shoulder, they left the infirmary, leaving Jack and Janet laughing behind them.